Good Luck Timing That Out

Some retired admiral died, and his wife "insisted" that a group of F-18s perform a flyover during the service. Well, this was extremely difficult to pull off, for numerous reasons. Anyway, the owner of the funeral home was able to make it happen. Unfortunately, the flyover was roughly 2-3 minutes earlier then scheduled. The wife was so mad that she tried to withold paying.

startinearly

How Else Would A 16-Year Old Go?

Former funeral director. Usually ran the back of the house but met with families on a few occasions. Met with the parents of a 16 year old girl who had died in a car crash. Arrangements were tough at first because how could they not be. We got the official stuff out of the way and then talked about what she (the deceased) would've wanted.

Ended up re-arranging the funeral home so that the lobby had crock pots of boiled peanuts and a lounge with the Lion King playing. Inside the main parlor was a purple-themed dance party. The pinnacle of the evening was the girl's mom leading everyone in doing "the wiggle." It was amazing and I am still floored by this family for being able to really celebrate their daughter's life in this way.

flynnen

All In The Family

Long line of funeral directors. My great grandfather buried a lady that was over 8 feet [tall] and worked as a performer for the circus. He had to use an oversized display model for the casket and sat on the coffin for seats (horses back then). Buried the whole site with concrete to keep out grave robbers. Heard she was a really nice lady.

kcguy1

Welcome...To The Dance Of Death!

The one where they wanted some gentleman to dance with their coffin.

AaronJoosep

literally dance macabre

ariel_y

May He Rest Well In The Halls Of Valhalla

A "Viking" funeral.

Putting the ashes of the deceased out to sea in a little boat fashioned out of salt and covered with dry flowers/kindling. Fashioning biodegradable arrows with flaming tips. Everyone shot flaming arrows at the boat and it caught fire then dissolved into the sea.

(Now to be clear, Vikings never did any of this but Hollywood gave people ideas...)

Apparently I am not the first, but it was cool. Put the "fun" back in "funeral."

harpejjist

At Least He Allowed It

When my grandfather died, we had a request we were afraid was odd, but the funeral director told us he'd seen much, much stranger, so it was okay.

My grandfather was big into motorcycles. He had Harleys as long as I can remember, and even after he had his hip surgery and the doctor told him not to ride anymore, he retooled his bike into a trike so he could still ride.

So after he died, my uncle outfitted the trike with a special rig (very secure and very safe) so that we could take him to the cemetery in his coffin on the back of the motorcycle. My uncle drove the motorcycle while all the members of my grandfathers riding club circled him from the funeral parlor to the cemetery. It was bad-ss and awesome, and I know my grandfather would've loved it.

EducatedOwlAthena

At Least They Didn't Sing, "Ding-Dong, The Witch Is Dead!"

As a funeral music planner and organist, I've worked with families on many funerals to honor "special requests."

One was a "Wizard of Oz"-themed funeral, where the deceased woman had loved the original movie and requested that music from it be used.

Pall bearers and friends of the family dressed in costumes of the principal characters as they entered the church, including dozens of Munchkins, Toto and the Witch.

There wasn't a dry eye after the eulogy when the soloist sang "Over the Rainbow," but many smiles as the coffin was carried out of the church en route to the cemetery as everyone sang "We're Off to See the Wizard, the Wonderful Wizard of Oz!"

Back2Bach

A Couple For The Road

Story one; a young guy died in a diving accident - his friends and family wanted him to be cremated in his diving suit. The crematorium guys told them the could not do this; but did not tell the reason. So the family decided to sneakily put his diving suit underneath his normal clothing, to give their loved one a proper farewell...

So, the corps goes into the oven, the neoprene suit catches fire and if you have ever seen a car tire fire you know what comes next. Picture the scene, a lovely bit of countryside with lush green fields, birds tweeting, elegant crematorium in the centre, with huge black billowing clouds of smoke coming out of the chimney, to be seen and smelled all over the area... woops

The next obvious one is the sneaking of bottles of expensive whisky in the pockets of the deceased, popular with the Indian population.

I won't have to tell you that the combination of an 800 degree C oven and a bottle of 40%VOL booze is an exciting one...

Best one was the story of the Eco-Friendly coffin. This crematorium had a system where the coffin during the ceremony would be lifted with two metal forks, the oven door opened, coffin gets inserted in the oven, door closes half way, forks retract and the coffin, pressing against the door stays in the oven; and finally the door closes completely.

Well, this system is perfect for wooden coffins but this guy was into his environment etc. and had an eco-friendly coffin made of some type of recycled cardboard. The forks lift, the oven door opens, the forks slide in, the coffin disintegrates instantaneously when it meets the intense heat of the oven, the door lowers half, the forks retreat, taking the body back outside of the oven.... Family and friends are distraught, staff try with broomsticks to push the corpse back in the oven, total chaos ensues.

Bealze-bubbles

Funeral Or A Party?

I've been in the funeral industry for over ten years now and most services I have arranged have been 'run-of-the-mill'. Most people seem to want similar things but one service will always stand out to me. A family asked us to play some hardcore gangster rap for their mother/grandmother at her service and we happily obliged. I can't quite remember the name of the song but it had heavy themes of murder, drug use and pretty foul language. Her service was then finished with a recital of the Lord's Prayer.

This lady was in her late eighties.

MelbourneTerrier

Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk him about it.