Sometimes love isn't forever, and more often than not the end is closer to the beginning of the story than many would like to admit. The end of a marriage is no fun for anyone involved. It maybe a long time coming and a long awaited satisfaction but never fun. And the reasoning behind the severing of ties can be something only a fiction writer wishes they could think up. It may not be fun, but it's certainly never dull.
Redditor u/xancanreturns wanted to hear from lawyers about all the crazy, most bizarre reasons love fades by inquiring.... Divorce Lawyers of Reddit, what's the most outrageous reason someone filed for divorce?
How Law & Order....
Pleased Law And Order Svu GIF by SVU
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To avoid prison. Guy came in saying he was going to be indicted for many things (the list would have been impressive if it wasn't also sickening). So, he wanted to marry his accomplice because he saw on TV that your spouse can't testify against you without your permission and the accomplice had cut a deal. He just needed to get this pesky marriage to his current wife dissolved.
They're both happily remarried.....
One straw really can break a camel's back. I'm related to a couple for whom the last straw was him laughing at a joke about how to light birthday candles.
Important context: things had been rocky for a while, and they'd gone back and forth with trial separations, counseling, renewal retreats, reconciliations that didn't quite last, etc. But then they were at their son's birthday party, and another relative started lighting the candles from the left side of the cake.
Wife: Why didn't you start from the center and light outward?
Relative: I thought about it, but I was worried you'd have nothing to complain about.
Husband: chuckles
Wife: storms out in tears, files for divorce the next week
Obviously, it would be dumb to say they divorced over the birthday candles, or over a joke. To her, him laughing at a joke that was made at her expense was a sign of the lack of respect between them. And she just couldn't take living with him if things were going to be like that.
They're both happily remarried and stayed civil as coparents.
"other wife"
Guy came in and wanted to divorce his wife because he found out that she was still married to some other guy. He then asked me if he needed to tell his "other wife" that he was married to this wife.
"Aah"
Billy Porter Tea GIF by Pose FX
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A man filed for divorce because he couldn't stand listening to his wife make the "aah" sound after every drink. Apparently it got to him over the years.
Oh Boy.... lemme tell you....
Oh boy I've been working at a family law firm for 3 years and I have seen/heard some crazy stuff.
For example:
- We handled the divorce for an older man (70s), bc he was cheating and wanted to be with his mistress. Two years go by, he comes back to divorce the mistress bc he's been cheating on HER with his first wife.
- Wife found photos of her husband dressed up as a ballerina.
- Husband files for divorce bc wife does cocaine. He brings us photos of her with coke on her bare boobs. Then admits he took the photos. Then admits he's the one with the coke habit.
- Wife filed for divorce bc she didn't want to relocate to a neighboring state for his promotion.
- Couple with "open marriage" both end up jealous and call different law firms, and file separate complaints for divorce within hours of each other. beloved_wolf
Woof....
Because she bought a $3500 dog as a surprise and when she sent him the picture he responded with "this kind of impulsive nonsense is why your family is poor."
He was very harsh, but damn, I have to agree with him. Don't waste your money, ladies and gents.
The Pics...
Overheard in court one day a woman wanted to divorce her husband because he likes taking pictures of trains, and had been doing so for years before.
If he was a major foamer, i can totally understand that. Some of those people drag their families around the country, chasing heritage units or trains that are hauling neat crap. Literally every Saturday i used to see the same dude in his minivan full of family, happily snapping pictures of us going by while his kids looked bored to tears and his wife (probably) contemplated pushing him in front of a train. I couldn't handle wasting all my free time with someone who just wants to foam at the mouth in excitement over trains.
No Crusts!
gordon ramsey idiot GIF
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He a woman who made his sandwich wrong. Well, she made it with an end piece. So he divorced her.
We never.... you know....
I had a woman call and say she needed an annulment but couldn't find her husband, and hasn't seen him in years. I corrected her that it would be a divorce, not an annulment. She told me they never consummated the marriage so it couldn't be a divorce. I told her that hasn't been the law in a long time, and she fought me on it. I asked her how exactly she intended to prove to the judge - with evidence - that her marriage wasn't consummated, and that got her upset enough to hang up on me.
Jealous Much?
Saved By The Bell 90S GIF by PeacockTV
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She saw him in bike shorts and said she could never be sexually attracted to him again.
I practically live on a bike path and let me tell you that some people shouldn't wear bike shorts. Or anything with spandex. Ever.
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I miss people being sane. Though that maybe election cycle issues not COVID. We'll never know.
I thought I was Alone...
Black Friday Nbc GIF by SuperstoreGiphy"Being able to grocery shop after 11 pm."
Reading_Rainboner
"Hell yes. I miss the days where the Walmart across the street was open 24 hours."
Small_Tax_9432
let's just go...
"I miss spontaneity... everything now seems to have a barrier of difficulty."
iidosee
"I live very close to Disneyland so I have an annual pass. My friends and I would just go there after work and hang out and grab a bite to eat."
"Now, we have to reserve a day to go. And most of the time, the days are at 'full' capacity so we couldn't even reserve. I don't want to schedule to hang out at Disneyland for a couple hours for July. So yeah, I definitely miss the 'lets go eat at Disneyland tonight?' texts."
mymymissmai
Not til 24-25
"Functioning global supply chains. Ah, the product you want has got microchips in it? 9 month wait."
richard-king
"Minimum, I'd been saying for a while now that I wouldn't expect a true return to normalcy in terms of electronics prices till 2024-2025. Although Crypto crashing through the floor really took some of the pressure off graphics cards which I really appreciate."
statiiic
WTF?!?!
"How affordable everything was!"
Disastrous_Hour_6776
"Yep. Today I was bagging up my things at the grocery store and I heard the cashier say to the lady behind me 'thats $78.12.' She had -- 2 boxes of Kellogg's corn flakes, a carton of 12 eggs, milk, strawberries, raspberries, blue berries, a small cheese cake, English muffins, coffee, and a small whole frozen chicken that could maybe feed 3 people if the meat portioning was small."
SnowyInuk
Sushi
sushi GIFGiphy"My favorite sushi place. It was good quality, close by, kid-friendly, and not too expensive."
InannasPocket
All of this... it was a simpler time.
NASTY
Janet Jackson Reaction GIFGiphy"As a retail worker, just how f**king NASTY some people have gotten."
DmitriPetrov*itch
"They applauded you for being an essential worker but won’t vote for policies that’ll raise minimum wage while insisting a wage cap for heavily paid employees."
sketchysketchist
CHANGES your DNA...
"Some of the people closest to me became very bitter and petty over the last 2 years. So many people have the 'crazy eyes' now."
__--__7
"So true and holidays with the family is like who has the biggest tinfoil hat building contest. How many jumps does your brain have to go through to think that the Covid vaccine CHANGES your DNA into the patented DNA so that the government now controls your body."
"So like vaccinated people now have a singular DNA set. I feel like I still have a chunk of my brain just broken off due to that comment alone. I was also told by same family member that I could never donate blood again due to the vaccine. I guess it is so my patented DNA doesn't affect people?? FYI my vaccinated butt just donated today fine and multiple other times after the vaccine."
tyreka13
Homeward Bound
"House prices."
adrianinked
"I'm resigned to never thinking I have a chance on owning property where I live. I'm 30 and just can't imagine it anymore. And I don't want to live anywhere else so, whatever."
Osdab2daf
"That didn’t happen because of the pandemic. That was already happening regardless."
CH11DW
Oh Mickey
"All Day Breakfast at McDonalds."
hutch2522
"It was honestly hell to do, and not very popular. ITs margins aren't anywhere dinner and lunch specials. ON top of that, the temperatures are such that They require its own grill, meaning that if you have 2 grills in shop, you are down 50% of lunch capacity."
Freyas_Follower
Way back when...
Season 5 Friends Tv Show GIF by FriendsGiphy"Hanging out with friends. And I mean waaaaaay before Covid. Like 2006 back when I had some friends."
LoocsinatasYT
I miss the old days. Maybe we'll get back there.
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I'm waffling between G-O-D and nothing. So please give me some education.
911
Role Playing Reaction GIF by Hyper RPGGiphy"We need to look out for each other because help isn't coming."
cknipe
Peace Out
"More than 2 decades ago, a priest was giving a sermon in my church and he said 'our faith requires you to believe without question. Why call it faith if you have to ask questions?' I haven't returned to church. Not until my wedding day but you know what I mean."
asiangontear
Delusion
"When I was young I used to think that after death you would have access to a PC that you could see absolutely anything about your life. Stats, any question you had no matter how obscure, replays of moments, perspectives of others in relation to you. No matter what you wanted to know, if it was relatable to you, you could see it. I know it's silly, but as time goes on I just want it to be real, and I don't think I'd have any issue allowing myself to fall into that delusion."
eggwardpenisglands
I think nothing happens...
"Realistically, I think nothing happens. We literally experience nothing after death. Same thing that we experience before birth. We don't exist, so it's nothing. I think the tenant that we should follow while living is to try to be happy and healthy while minimizing the damage we do to each other."
"What I would LIKE to happen after death is whatever you believe in, exists. I think Christians should get to go to heaven if they truly believe in it, Hindus and Buddhists get reincarnated, and everyone else also gets to experience what they believe they will experience."
"'I would still experience Nothing. Maybe it's one of those things where at the moment of death their brain makes them experience what feels like an infinitely long moment in time where they experience their afterlife. I just think it would be neat for everybody."
Better_Meat_
Shrug
Happy GIFGiphy"Best advice I received from a dear senior on their way out. 'You win some, you lose some' shrug. Nothing divine, life is that simple and wonderful, accept it and move on."
Tune_Kindly
It all sounds pretty simple. Why are people so up in arms about Atheists?
Whatever
Bored Episode 15 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy"I believe in a universe that doesn't care, and people that do."
imCIK
Cool with Empty
"Nothing. [Serious]."
rumblingtummy29
"I feel this way about death. When I was 5, my grandfather died and my cousin simple said, he is dead, that means you are gone forever. Everything ends up dying, even plants and animals. I'm now in my 40's and still have this simplistic view of life and death. People think I'm ambivalent to life and death but it's just what it is."
thepigfish82
puppet-masters...
"I think a lot of religious people struggle with the fact that we are all just swirling units of chaos. There is no grand plan or great orchestrator. I think that’s why people who are prone to religion are also susceptible to things like Q anon and the Cabal and all that. They REALLY want to believe that there is some almighty puppet-master who determines all of humanity’s fate."
Lngtmelrker
“we’re living in a society!”
"Just be a kind and empathetic person not because you’re worried about some cosmic justice, but because it’s the right thing to do. If there is some being that created us there’s no way they actually care about believing in it or adhering to some rules from over 2000 years ago."
"Also a big thing for me is that I find the idea that you need religion or the Bible in order to have morals and ethics pretty dumb. It’s pretty f**king clear that most evangelicals have neither. But my main thing is being a good person simply because, as George Costanza once said we’re living in a society!' If you’re only a good person in order to make it to heaven you probably aren’t actually a good and moral person."
conservative_genius
That's All
Circle Of Life Loop GIFGiphy"You're born. You live. You die. That's it. After you die you cease to exist, the same as before you were born."
serefina
Believe what you want. We're all here together. So let's focus there.
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I feel like this article can go on forever. Let's get some highlights.
Wasted Time
Nbc Im Done GIF by SuperstoreGiphy"Meetings that could and should have been an email."
Sirena609
Lotto People
"Getting stuck behind people playing the lottery at a corner store."
thenuggetlover
"I also used to work in a gas station and you’re SO right. I f**king hated the lottery people. Especially since my store had a small staff and there was usually only one of us working at a time, which meant that I couldn’t get any of my other work done as long as they were there."
"And you’re right, it’s also pretty sad to watch. I had one lady who used to come in every day and spent hundreds and HUNDREDS of dollars on scratch tickets. One day, she won $200 after spending probably around $600 and she was so excited and saying she can 'finally pay her bills.'"
i-am-your-god-now
Aware...
"No situational awareness. Job, home, shopping, driving. Think for one minute and go about. OBSERVE!!"
Dizzy-Foundation8122
"My mom is one of those people who leave the shopping cart in the middle of the damn aisle and proceed to walk twenty feet away. After correcting her a million times to no effect I just walk away now so people don’t know I’m with her."
OutrageousEvent
Shut Up!
"Endless barking in the middle of the night, I love animals but that sh*t I can't stand."
Acceptable-Lemon2924
"Endless barking in general drives me up a wall. One of my friends dogs was barking almost an entire gaming session the other day. I wanted to reach through the computer and smack him for letting it go on."
bangersnmash13
Kindness
customer service waiter GIFGiphy"People being mean to service workers, especially if the workers are very young."'
scaryboilednoodles
All of these things. I hate them all.
Admit It
Admit It Tell The Truth GIF by TV LandGiphy"People who never accept fault when they mess something up. Like, why blame a million people when it was clearly you who did it???"
Quirky-Area-8978
From Above
"My upstairs neighbors."
lutzow89
"I had terrible neighbors at my previous apartment. It was a one person studio for students, but her boyfriend was clearly living with her illegally and he was loud."
"One night we knocked n the door at 3 AM because of the loud music and an unknown girl opened the door. I just thought they were having a little party. But the next door I saw the girl living there come home with a suitcase after having been away for the weekend... Her BF was cheating on her in her own apartment."
Th3_Accountant
Move Away
"People who sit directly next to me at the airport, movie theater, any other place where you can choose a seat when there is PLENTY of other seating."
BacardiPardy33
"I can’t YES this enough and the ones who can’t park for crap so they park so close you can’t open doors on one side of the car or the ones who park directly behind when you pulled through so the door won’t open to load groceries."
BacardiPardy33
It's Over
"People who try to restart old drama. Like I'm done with you, just leave me alone."
Tired_Potatos
"Yep, half the reason I've basically quit playing one of my favorite online video games. People keep bringing old crap up or sh*tting on on someone who used to be our friend. I got tired of it so I just ejected the game out of me."
CaucasianHumus
AHHHHH!!!
move leading GIFGiphy"People walking too slow in front of me with no way to get around them. It’s even worse if it’s a couple or group taking up the whole sidewalk. HAVE SOME SPATIAL AWARENESS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!"
_-v0x-_
Life in general pisses me off. I'm easy.
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