Whatever you do... don't do it!
Too late.
After Redditor FossaRed asked the online community, "What's the most inappropriate time you laughed?" everyone had a good (appropriate) laugh at that while recounting their memories.
You see, we've all done it. No use in denying it. As for the consequences of those laughs... while not everyone went into great detail, we imagine they're probably even funnier in hindsight.
"This was at a ballet school performance."
This was at a ballet school performance. It was for kids ranging from 5 to 16 year olds.
For one of the younger age groups they did this thing where one kid pranced from one corner of the stage to the other, and then another kid would do the opposite, in a big X pattern. And they would have these gigantic sh!t-eating grins on their faces. Just horribly precious.
Well I started losing it at about the 15th kid but it went on for like 40 children! By the end I was in tears and all the other adults in the audience near me had found it contagious so everyone was just sitting there laughing at their own children.
"I always had a problem..."
I always had a problem laughing when I was being scolded in my childhood. Then I would be scolded further for laughing, then I would laugh more. It was a vicious cycle.
"We were at my uncle's funeral..."
We were at my uncle's funeral whose death was a surprise; I was standing with my cousin who just came back from abroad to attend her dad's funeral and was breaking down. My aunt, the deceased's sister, came to tell my cousin that someone we know is apologizing for not being able to attend the funeral because she's in the hospital due to a car accident, my aunt went on describing the woman's very difficult condition and how she had an "iron pole" stuck into her forehead. 10 minutes later, the woman appears through the door in perfect health with just some scratches, my cousin sees her and look at me from the other side of the crowded silent room and we both can't stop laughing for the rest of the funeral.
"As soon as she opened her mouth..."
A woman got on stage to sing during a friend's wedding as part of the ceremony. It was naturally a song the bride and groom chose.
As soon as she opened her mouth it became clear that she absolutely tone deaf. It sounded like an animal being tortured.
I was trying not to laugh but two guys behind me started laughing and it set off a chain reaction of laughter. Even the groom was red faced from trying not to laugh. She just kind of sheepishly left the stage afterward.
"Me and friend..."
GiphyMe and a friend were altar boys. An older woman took to the podium to read a Bible passage. The passage described how Jesus loves everyone: the sick and the healthy, the rich and the poor, the circumcised and the uncircumcised. That's all it took for a pair of 10 year old boys to start laughing hysterically in front of a packed church.
"I was once hired to sing at a funeral..."
I was once hired to sing at a funeral and right before I was called up, the little boy in front of me ripped the loudest fart. I dug my face into my lady friends shoulder and my whole body trembled as I tried to keep it together. With in seconds I was at the pulpit and trying to come up with what I would do if I broke out laughing. I sang to the best of my ability at the time with a "cough" every now and then. We left immediately afterwards and laughed in the car till we couldn't breath.
"But there's one section..."
A few years ago I was participating in a religious ceremony with my extended family. I'm not religious, but my mom and her family are so I agreed to participate. I was tasked with reading one of the sections aloud and had to read off a list of titles of the Virgin Mary. Most of them were pretty straightforward, "Queen of the Angels, Queen Most Holy", etc.
But there's one section that starts with the word "Virgin...". I get to it and I'm trying not to smirk, but as soon as I said the phrase "Virgin Most Powerful" I glanced at my brother and my SO and they were grinning at me. Their grins caused me to burst into giggles and I had to excuse myself while my mom glared knives into me.
My brother continued the rest of the reading.
"He had a squeaky voice."
Group therapy.
A kid (22 or so but you get the idea) was talking passionately about his struggles with Asperger's and OCD. He had a squeaky voice. He started talking about his OCD categories: things that belonged under the earth, things that belonged on the earth, things that belonged in the water, and things that belonged in space. He named specific objects. Rocks, bugs, etc.
He said there were some things he could not fit neatly into his categories, even if they seemed like they were supposed to be in one. This distressed him.
He bemoaned cars. He bemoaned women and pointed at one.
Then with no segue, announced that the reason he was there was because he snuck into the zoo at night and leapt into the lion enclosure.
I had to bury my face in my elbow and turn away.
Of course his problems were real, but it just seemed so out of place on a day when people were talking about who diddled them when.
"I was getting scolded..."
I was getting scolded by a teacher and just started to laugh. She wrote a note and told me to get it signed by my parents. Went back home and gave the note to my dad. He started scolding me and then I started laughing again. I'll spare you the details of what happened after that.
"A young teenager..."
A young teenager was leaning forward in a chair at a restaurant, lost traction, and SLAMMED their face into the table. Absolute hysterical sobbing ensued. Their parents stopped eating their salads to make sure they were okay (they were, aside from a nose bleed)
I was sitting at the table next to them and cracked the hell up at the sound of them hitting the table, and even more when they started crying.
I was a horrible human being in that moment. Feel bad after the fact, but in the moment it tickled me to my core.
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.
People Break Down The Cooking Hacks They Swear By
Reddit user Penya23 asked: 'What are some cooking hacks you swear by?'
Adults, who told you that you were going to have to come up with something to eat, three times per day, every day, for the rest of your life?
That fact feels like a false advertisement for life sometimes, but there are ways of making what can be a tough requirement go much smoother than what some of us may be currently putting up with.
Redditor Penya23 asked:
"What are some cooking hacks you swear by?"
Reduce Waste with Water
"Revive veggies that have lost their water by cutting their edges and soaking them in cold water. Lettuce, carrots, and celery will be crisp again."
- Rosy180
"Old produce guy here. Luke warm water is best, then refrigerate. The warm water makes the plant cells open more to absorb more water; while the refrigerator makes them hard to retain water and crisp."
- tjipa84
Buy the Good Scissors
"A quality set of scissors will save you so much hassle..."
- Mitchs_Frog_Smacky
"They should be able to disassemble at the hinge point for cleaning purposes."
- adamadamada
"And for sharpening. I hate MLMs as much as the next gal, but those d**n Cutco scissors my mom has are still going strong 25 years later."
- burnt00toast
Perfect and Easy Stuffed Shells
"When making stuffed shells by hand, mix the filling in a zip-lock bag, then cut a corner off and use it as a makeshift piping bag to fill the shells."
- PApauper
Include That Extra Zing
"If your food is bland even though you've added salt, then it's missing acidity. Lemon juice, lime juice, or vinegar are easy additions."
- PhreedomPhighter
Use the Power of Salt
"Salting your food 20 to 40 minutes before cooking makes a world of difference in the salt permeating the food."
- illusiveXIII
"Pat the meat dry first, then salt. This shift in osmolarity between the surface and the inside allows better penetration if the salt."
- tossthedice511
The Soy Sauce Secret
"I use soy sauce in a lot of stews and soups to help bring out savory flavors. My minestrone, for instance, usually has some soy sauce in it."
- potentialEmployee248
Don't Forget the Cocoa Powder
"Don't knock unsweetened cocoa powder. I add this to stews and chilis, and it adds a rich depth of flavor, and no one can pick out the cocoa."
- rthaw
"Everybody raves about my pecan pie and always wants me to make them for potlucks or gatherings. It’s literally the Karo syrup bottle recipe with a teaspoon of cinnamon, the tiniest dash of ginger, and 1.5 tablespoons of cocoa powder, and it’s exactly like you mentioned, a depth of flavor without actually tasting like chocolate."
- loyalpagina
MSG is Not All Bad
"Try a little powdered MSG. It will make any stew better. Chili and gumbo in particular really benefit, in my honest opinion."
- Red_Spork
"It's not called Makes Stuff Good for nothing."
- aquila-audax
Browned Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies
"Not my tip, but my wife browns the butter before she adds it to chocolate chip cookie dough and they're the best freakin cookies I've ever eaten!"
- dcbluestar
"If my recipe calls for cinnamon or other spices and melted butter, I let the spices cook in the butter for a bit to bloom them."
- screech_owl_kachina
Know the Difference Between Spices
"One thing that took me embarrassingly long to learn was that some spices are fat-soluble, and others are water-soluble."
"When I first started learning to cook, I wanted to figure out how to use each of the common spices."
"I put a dab of paprika on my finger, licked it, and it tasted like... nothing. I concluded that it was a useless spice and took it out of my cooking."
"I was wrong, of course. Paprika is fat-soluble, so when I put it straight on my tongue, there was nothing that could break it down. If I'd mixed it with oil or butter first, the taste would've been apparent."
"We have to be conscious of this in our cooking. Water-soluble compounds can be readily broken down by the saliva in our mouths, but fat-soluble ones need to be mixed with a fat (e.g. 'bloomed' in butter)."
"And a lot of spices (including garlic and cinnamon) contain both types of compounds, so they'll have one flavor on their own, but a different, fuller flavor when bloomed."
- FutureBlackmail
Easy Safety is the Best Safety
"Leaving a potholder on the handle of a cleaned cast iron pan to let anyone who might put it away know it may be hot as it cools down."
- Huntsmart2000
"Ditto for any skillet that comes out of the oven after roasting or braising. A towel immediately goes over the handle to remind myself not to instinctively go for the handle."
- Drach85
Avoid That Bitter Note
"If a recipe says to sauté onions and garlic together at the same time, DON'T."
"Do the onions first, and then add the garlic when the onions are just about done. Garlic can be over sautéed and it takes on a bitter flavor."
- dcbluestar
Prep Before, and Clean As You Go
"Prep everything first. Have all of your veggies cut and ingredients ready. You will be more relaxed."
"Clean as you go. Wash your dishes while waiting for your food to finish cooking. Fewer dishes to deal with at the end of the night."
- Draginia
Nothing Like High-Quality Knives
"Knives, get good knives and a sharpener."
- Pews_TRB
"Also, knife quality has NOTHING to do with how sharp it is in advertising or when you get it."
"If it dulls after cutting a few soft items, you probably got scammed."
- Ciryl_Lynyard
Small Additions Make All the Difference
"If your executive function is betraying you and you rely on microwaveable or premade meals, find something small you can add to make them more substantial and to feel more like a meal."
"Add chopped broccoli to ramen noodles. Cumin and red pepper flakes are great to toss in, too. Cook minute rice with a chicken boullion cube and some butter and pretend it’s risotto."
"My personal favorite is to dump a can of corn into a microwave-safe bowl and mix in a bunch of taco seasoning."
"And if clean-up is a struggle too, use paper plates and bamboo flatware. Disposable chopsticks are super cheap and easy to find online."
"When you’re struggling with depression, fatigue, or anything that makes taking care of yourself harder, taking shortcuts isn’t laziness, it’s how you survive to make those more daunting tasks a little less scary."
"Unrelated: if you’re making a soup or stir fry with lots of veggies, sauté the veggies a bit before adding other ingredients until the onions are translucent. I’m sure there’s some food science reason that this makes soups taste better but I have no idea what it is."
- ThunderDash
"As a multiply disabled person, f**k yes!"
"I swear by those 90 second rice packs. I get Ben's Original (Kroger, $1 sale), as well as Walmart and Target store brands ($1.25 to $1.50). Is it so much more expensive? F**k yes, but it's worth it."
"Frozen vegetables, canned beans, and rotisserie chicken are shortcuts that many poo poo on, but for me, they mean the difference between not eating and eating."
"And my personal favorite, adult Lunchables made from a handful of nuts or a spoonful of nut butter, crudites, and fresh fruit with cheese and crackers/pretzels/mini bread is such an easy thing to throw together and snack on for hours."
- annimdi
While cooking may not be everyone's favorite past time, there are ways to make the whole experience easier, much more enjoyable, and tastier than anything you've whipped up before.
We all have our own ideas about what our lives should look like and how we want our individual households to run.
When a young person wants different things for their home than their parents do, it might be time to move out.
Redditor RavenGreekGod asked:
"What made you move out of your parents' house?"
Too Many Cooks
"Too many adults under one roof. I needed to branch off and be my own person in my own space."
- cmf1990
Simple Independence
"I love my parents, and I honestly have a great relationship with them. In fact, I'm moving across the country to be near them in about a month, and I'll be living with them for a bit while I search for my own place."
"However, when I live with them, I struggle to act as an independent adult. It's as much my fault as everyone else's, but I still prefer living on my own long term."
- retief1
Financial Trouble
"Mom was downsizing due to financial difficulties and didn’t have room for me in the new apartment."
"So, I struck a deal with the manager of the little restaurant where I worked part-time to rent a room from him and his wife while I finished high school. It was a good growing-up experience."
"The only downside was I’m pretty sure my manager didn’t bother mentioning to his wife that some awkward pimple-faced 17-year-old would me moving in until that Saturday morning when I was dragging all my crap through their living room towards the back bedroom."
"She gave me a frosty reception and frankly, I couldn’t blame her."
- Southern_Snowshoe
Not So Merry Christmas
"My brother's friend called home from college in early December, to make travel plans for coming home over Christmas break."
"His parents said, 'Oh, uh, yeah, about that, we meant to tell you before... we moved... to a one-bedroom apartment... but I guess if you wanted to come here and sleep on the couch for the break, I guess that would be okay...'"
"He did not go home over break, or to my knowledge, ever again. He spent Christmas at our house that year, instead of with his own family."
- DaddyBeanDaddyBean
"Crippling Disability"
"Living with my s**tty, controlling parents for 18 years was enough to make me move out and run to the farthest, most remote college I could without having to pay out-of-state fees."
"They wanted me to stay home and go to community college because I was their 'precious, delicate little girl' and because I had ADHD, it meant I was destined to be incapable of looking after myself, and they needed to shelter me."
"Everything I accomplished, my grades, my awards, my honors, they attributed it all to themselves, not to me (I couldn't achieve those things, I had ADHD after all. In their eyes, it was all them). They believed being verbally abusive somehow helped me succeed (it didn't, it just stunted my growth)."
"I took my diploma, my scholarships, and my PC and got the f**k outta dodge. Best decision I ever made. I did just fine, and I am a successful electrical engineer with a husband, a house, and an active healthy social life."
"So much for my 'crippling disability.'"
- McMew
Severe Anxiety Attacks
"I found an okay job and left immediately. I’m lucky I did. I can survive about a week with my dad before remission into panic attacks and severe anxiety. The last time I spent more time than that, we had an argument that ended with me in the hospital (no violence, just fear)."
"Yeah, no thanks. I’ve since gotten a support group of friends that I can stay with if something goes wrong, and I’m lucky I can live without him spending much time in my life. I don’t think I’d be around if I couldn’t."
- MountainMan2_
Packed the Bags
"We didn’t have a house. We lived in an apartment. I had been paying half the rent since I was 15."
"One day, I got home, and my mom was packing bags. I asked what’s up, where was she going? She said she was going to go stay with my sister and see my nieces. I was like okay, cool, see you in a few days, I guess."
"I got a call two weeks later that she wasn’t coming back and already told the landlord I’d be out in 24 hours. I called the landlord and told him I had no idea what was going on. He gave me a month to move out."
"I put all my mom's stuff in storage and started life on my own. To this day, I don’t know why she chose to up and leave me. I’ve asked her and she just says she missed my nieces and wanted to be with them."
"Really going to drop a 17-year-old and give them 24 hours to move out. Took a long time to get over."
- captainkrakin
18 and Homeless
"She kicked me out the day after my 18th birthday because I turned 18. She dropped me at a homeless shelter with a small laundry basket of clothing and no money."
- AkKik-Maujaq
Time to Cosign
"I went to college. When I graduated, I moved back until I could find my own place."
"After a week of living there, I felt it was time to go. I had a fine childhood and my parents are nice and all. But my dad went right back to treating me like a high schooler. If he wanted me to do something around the house, I had to do it right then, like I didn't just work 8 hours like everybody else."
"The funny thing is, he told me that I had six months to find my own place (which is fine, this was in 2006). I asked him to cosign on an apartment and moved out after two weeks of living there."
"He then told me he was joking about the six months. I think he missed me."
- CaptainAwesome06
Unreasonable Standards
"My dad raised the rent to pay half of his mortgage while I was 17 and had barely gotten my first job. Talk about killing your kid's economic future."
"It was an easy decision to move out. He was also an alcoholic and smoked like a chimney. You live and move on."
- Intrepid-Ad-3871
Anxiety-Inducing
"I could practically feel their breath on the back of my neck."
- burn-babies-burn
Classic Scapegoat
"I was already in the process of finding a place to live when I got kicked out by my mom. And it was for something I didn't even do! (It's so ridiculous that I can kinda laugh about it now, but the situation was so messed up.)"
"My parents have a terrible marriage and apparently, my dad decided to use something I said in an argument against my mom. Thing is? I never said the things he claimed I did. I was asleep for most of this screaming match (they happened daily, so you learned to sleep through it) and was entirely unaware that I had been thrown under the bus."
"I woke up the next morning to my mother waiting for me in the kitchen, going absolutely bananas, yelling at me, and I could not get a word in. I had to leave with no warning and just stuff as much as I could into my backpack and two plastic bags and drag my belongings with me to my first-year uni math lecture. I had to explain to all my friends why on earth I was dragging so much stuff around all day, fun times."
"To this day, six years later, they still have not acknowledged that it happened and just pretend that it was a 'disagreement' where I was equally at fault."
- mihio94
A Golden Scapegoat
"I was every parent's dream. A law-abiding, obedient, straight-A student going to college on scholarship."
"I nannied, tutored, chauffeured, and cleaned up after my three younger sisters. My part-time job went to groceries for the family instead of luxuries or even savings for myself."
"But somehow Mom was unable to communicate with me in any form other than lecturing. I was never good enough."
"I left at 17 and never looked back. I have a chill, successful, happy life surrounded by people who appreciate me and tell me so. Mom doesn't understand why I don't call her (for more lectures)."
- bluescrew
The Circle of Life
"I got pregnant at 18, married, moved out, and had the baby at 19."
"Then I divorced, went back home, and then out, and then back in a few times over the following years."
"Finally at 26, I moved out again with a degree, a career, and the best husband ever."
"And then five years later, my parents moved in with me. Life is crazy."
- Gladyskravitz99
There are all sorts of reasons that a young adult will decide to move out beyond simply turning 18.
Though some will move out because of toxic homes and parents who make them move out, there are others who move for far more independent reasons, like going off to college or wanting to start a life of their own.
Outdoorsy People Break Down The Most Terrifying Experiences They've Ever Had In The Woods
Being surrounded by nature by going camping or hiking is a yearning many people have to escape their everyday metropolitan trappings.
However, as much as a breath of fresh air is a good thing for everyone, not everything encountered in the woods can be utopian or blissful.
Because we just might encounter a wolf disguised as grandma, or even worse things.
Curious to hear what other horrors might be lurking in nature, Redditor Inevitable-Print-702-702 asked:
"Outdoorsmen of Reddit, what’s your most terrifying encounter in the woods?"
Some things are better left undiscovered.
Lost Hearing
"Man I don't even go out that often but the one time I do I found a severed ear on a hiking path."
– hausenbergerdorff
Fertilizing The Grounds
"A grown man taking a sh*t, when I was maybe 8-9. He was squatting in the trees off the trail, dressed in business casual. We made eye contact, he looked absolutely terrified, and I turned and started walking away. For some reason, he said, 'Wait!'"
"I did not wait and took off running."
"He might've been some kind of pervert with a sinister post-dump plan, but I think he just panicked and probably didn't know why he said that. I like to imagine him fleeing through the woods, watching for the police and thinking, 'why the hell did I tell him to wait???'"
– FoldedaMillionTimes
Ominous Dwellers
"In the 90s, I was on a week-long backpacking trip with my uncle in the Colorado high-country. He was a professional rock climbing-trail guide at the time, so he knew his stuff while off-the-grid."
"The second day in, we were following some old trail that hadn't been groomed in years, and came across the outskirts of some random commune deep in the woods. We knew there were people there because we could see campfires and laughing/talking in the distance."
"My uncle immediately freaks out, tells me to keep quiet, and then made us back track nearly five miles, and then around. It was the first and only time I've actually seen him panic off-the-grid."
"Afterward, he lectured me that it was some kind of small sect or cult that had a rep for being very territorial in the area at the time, and was known to shoot at trespassers without provocation."
– Avery_Di_Umbra
Animals are cute...when you're not invading they're territory.
When Comes Mama
"I was all dressed up in a ghillie photographing bee-eaters and then some little boar piglets start getting near me sniffing at me. 10 seconds later I hear a very loud noise and the mom was running towards me. I left there my camera and climbed the nearby tree faster than a monkey. I stayed up there like an airborne turd half afternoon."
– Ares982
Adrenaline Rush
"While on horseback came across a deer carcass. Horse was spooked and about 30 yards away saw a grizzly stand up...... Felt my heart pumping hard."
– Quiet-Cancer
Bear-ly Breathing
"Had an over-curious bear climb up the tree I was in during a hunt and man I almost jumped out of the tree. He just wanted to say hi but sh*t yo I definitely was scared to death."
– MaximumMajestic
Bye, Kitty Kitty
"Face to face with a cougar while making my way to the deer stand. I had to check my drawers afterwards."
– otcconan
Welcome Cow-mittee
"I was on a month-long canoeing trip though the sub-arctic tundra. I was looking for a good place to set up my tent, I hadn't realized I had just accidently stumbled within 10 meters or so of a massive Caribou bull and two cows."
"We all just stared at each other for a minute or so, then they ran off."
– Drach88
Unpredictable dangers befell these innocent Redditors while in the forest.
Open Season
"When I was like 14 I was hunting deer with my dad and heard a weird sizzle. I heard 2 more and my dad screamed at me to get down. It was the sound of another hunter shooting in our direction. He hadn't seen us despite the orange. I will never forget that sound. It's a very different experience being on the other end of the bullet."
– Post-Scarcity-Pal
Close Calls
"Slipped and tumbled backwards head over heels down a rock face. There was about a twenty foot drop after that but I got wedged in between a tree and the rock face. Ended up walking away with just a couple bruises."
"Another time in the Sierra Nevadas I fell through a hole that was covered in snow. My rifle stopped me from falling straight through and I yelled for help. When I was getting pulled out all I saw was a black hole beneath me that covered in snow again. No idea how deep it was or if anyone would have heard me if I just poofed through the snow into a crevasse."
– COCKBLOKALYPSE
Raining Bullets
"Bullets whizzing over my head. Some smooth brains were target shooting in the middle of an established hiking trail. Wasn't a one off experience either!"
– _old_relic_
Woods in general freak me out due to the lack of clear line of sight.
For that reason alone, I tend to avoid wooded areas and prefer prairies, meadows, or a clearing when I go hiking.
So if I find anything that doesn't belong out on my hike, it won't raise alarm because being out in the open somehow makes it less ominous for me.
Now, if I see a wild animal that might want to cause me harm or views me as lunch, I'm pretty much screwed since I won't be able to scamper up any trees or hide behind one.
Well, so much for that.
There is little people fear more than their home being broken into.
Particularly when they're inside it.
Unlikely as the prospect sounds, there are a staggering 1.65 million home invasions in the US per year.
And in many of those cases, people were unlucky enough to have been home when these invasions took place.
Those who lived to tell the tale, however, might consider themselves lucky.
"People who were in a real home invasion situation, what was it like and what did you do?"
He Didn't Know Who He Was Dealing With...
Dude came knocking on the front door and my mom and I ignored it."
"I was about 10 and my mom didn’t want to answer the door to a stranger."
"He knocked a while then went around the back and hopped the gate to try the back door."
"My mom got her gun and opened the back door with it visible, right before he tried to smash the glass."
"He took off running and was arrested on B&E charges the next day after he broke into someone else’s apartment and couldn’t run."- SilverSunrises
It's Always Lunch Money That Gets Stolen First...
"Was in 7th grade home alone after a half day when suddenly there was very hard knocking on my back door."
"I knew immediately something was off because we never have visitors and my father did not knock like that, and froze up in my room."
"I peak out of my room (right in front of back door) and suddenly it's quiet so I go back to my room."
"AS SOON as I close my door I hear glass shatter."
"Turned off my computer and TV and dove under my bed."
"For the next 40 minutes I hear him thrashing around my living room and parents room, then hear them leave."
"During this I'm on call with the cops who think I'm PRANK CALLING THEM and take 70 minutes to finally come over."
"The station is 3 streets away from my house."
"They come and investigate only to find out it was our next door neighbor that broke in and was actually looking for drug money, as it turns out the previous person to live here did at-home haircuts and sold weed on the side."
"The neighbor was arrested and his family moved out a week later."
"THE ONLY THING THIS GUY TOOK WAS MY LUNCH MONEY I LEFT ON A COUNTER OUTSIDE FOR THE NEXT DAY."- level 1Ogletreb
whatever you say bully GIFGiphyThey Actually Apoligized...
"Four guys knocked on my buddies door at 11pm."
"He lived with a bunch of other guys so this wasn’t anything new."
"They burst in and held a gun to his neck and demanded the drugs."
"He stammered that there weren’t any drugs but they could take what they wanted."
"One guy held him there with the gun as the others searched the house."
"Since they didn’t find anything they realized they had the wrong house and left."
"As they were leaving the last guy said ‘sorry, this wasn’t my idea'."- discostud1515
A Gun Needs No Explanation
"My in-laws were home when a young guy broke into their house."
"They don’t speak English very well so my FIL, in the clearest English he could muster loudly said, 'Get me my gun!''
"At that point the intruder left in a hurry."- TheManInTheShack
Could Have Used The Teethmarks As Evidence...
"I was at my friend’s place when it happened to him."
"We were both teenagers then."
"The guy thought everyone was sleeping and he got startled when he saw us, he bit my friend (his arm required stitches from the bite) and ran away."
"No idea who the guy was or what he wanted, never happened again and we never saw the guy again."- Melancholic84·
He Should Have Chosen Which House More Carefully...
"Tackled the guy."
"The hardest I’ve ever hit someone, and I’m a pretty big guy with a football background."
"But he didn’t see me coming."
"It felt very much like a do or die moment so I didn’t hold anything back."
"Broke a few of his bones, messed up his face, and got him sentenced to 6 years."- The_SunDancer
Still Had To Replace That TV...
"Not me, but my aunt."
"She was at home alone in her backyard making food, and when she walked into the living room, she saw a couple of men in the middle of carrying out the tv."
"It seems that they didn’t think anyone was at home; they got surprised, dropped the tv, and ran out after she started screaming."- RitaSaluki
Feline Intuition
"I was in bed asleep at 7am when I heard a loud bang."
"I thought nothing of it because of the large cat tree I have downstairs that's always getting knocked over, so I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep."
"Not long after my elderly cat comes running into my bedroom, jumps up on the bed and tries to hide under the blankets."
"This immediately woke me up because that old fat cat hadn't ran nor jumped on our bed for years."
"As I came two I see two men coming up my stairs."
"At that point it felt like time stopped and somehow ran incredibly fast at the same time."
"I jumped out of bed and started screaming 'GET THE F*CK OUT OF MY HOUSE!' and I remembered thinking while chasing these guys through my house and screaming again and again at the top of my lungs that my voice sounds exactly like my brother and I wondered how strange that was.""I tackled one of them on my front lawn, but he struggled free and got away."
"I saw the get away car and tried to keep repeating the license number, but it faded away in my mind as I was repeating it."
'I remember vividly being so mad at myself that I couldn't remember 7 numbers, and how stupid I was for not grabbing my phone! "
"Looking back on the situation there are so many things that happened that I never noticed, like how I fractured my arm slamming into the wall at the bottom of my stairs, and that I cut my feet up on the splintered wood of my front door."
"The adrenaline rush of a true fight or flight situation is something so strange it's almost impossible to accurately describe."
"The sense of time, not being aware of pain and injuries for hours, and the hyper focus on some details but the complete loss of others."
"Luckily I wasn't seriously hurt and nothing was stolen, but I installed cameras all over my house the very next day."- robot_boat_loan
camera surveillance GIF by MOST EXPENSIVESTGiphySometimes Size Does Matter...
"Girlfriend and I were sleeping in bed, some dummy broke into our apartment, ran real quick when he saw how big my naked a** was."- Croceyes2
FIVE DAYS?!?!
"Blocked the doors when it became clear that someone was trying to break in."
"My husband and I were staying with a friend and her husband; her step son and elderly mother in law were also in the house."
"Someone had heard the old lady had jewelry and decided to try their luck."
"We heard this later through the town grapevine."
"Said person then escalated to trying to kick his way in through the windows (they were leaded)."
"My husband called the police while my friend tried to keep the gap and child calm and her husband and I screamed a lot and sort of flailed at the protruding feet with pokers from the old fireplace."
"On realizing there were more of us than there were of him, he ran off."
"Good thing too; the police never showed."
"They called 5 days later to see 'if we still needed their assistance'."
"Bloody useless."
"In comparison 6 months later I arrived at work to discover the door and cash drawer had been jimmied and the £50 float nicked and they were over and taking fingerprints inside the hour."
"I wonder why trust in the police is so low."
"Total mystery."- Haunting-blade
It's a hard call to decide which is worse, being in the house while it's being burgled, and potentially saving your valuables, or being out and losing them.
Either way, it's a terrible situation no one deserves to be in.
Making the notion of buying a security system and bolts for your doors seem better with every passing second.