People Confess The Details Of Their Most Embarrassing Trip To The Doctor
HansMartinPaul/Pixabay

A visit to the doctor is hardly ever a pleasant one, but we do what we must to ensure we have a clean bill of health.

But that doesn't mean patients aren't apprehensive about going to see their doctor for weird or embarrassing ailments–like the common case scenario where patients seek assistance after having foreign objects stuck in orifices where they don't belong or accidents involving the genitals.
Or, once in the doctor's office, there is no shortage of awkward conversations that can take place–all for the sake of making sure you're in tip-top shape.
The list is endless.

Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor GodOfMoominism asked:

"What was your most embarrassing trip to the doctor?"

The foolishness resulting in a trip to the doctor's office can be embarrassing to mention.

A Lesson Learned

"Not as embarrassing as the others but the time I was really slack about taking my blood thinners cause they are expensive AF and my job was wobbly thanks to the plague."

"Ended up in hospital with blood clots in my lungs and a kidney infection."

"I now take them as directed."

– MzFrazzle

Embarrassing Inflammation

"Infected ballsack."

"Crushed my nuts with a milkcrate at work, and when asked by the emergency staff how it happened they were confused. Spent roughly 10hrs trying to explain how and even had to demonstrate a few times."

– AussieMilk

When The Clippers Won

"Cut the flap of skin that connects my sack to the shaft of my penis with hair clippers. Not only was it a day that they were training new doctors but also my mom worked for the hospital and saw my name on the computer system."

"So by the end of the visit, I had 5 extra young doctors staring while I got stitches but also my mom walked in too thinking something bad happened to me."

– KeyProtection7

Anything having to do with the nether region elicited chuckles.

Just Backed Up

"Went to the ER for stomach pains, worried about appendix, spleen, gall bladder etc."

"I was constipated."

"My brother still tells the joke that the one time i went to the doctor I was full of sh*t."

– DAM5150

Pass On The Gas

"I had a kidney stone in high school, but when the nurse palpated my stomach (really f'king hard, too), she must have shifted it, because the pain stopped for a few minutes. I was flabbergasted when she suggested it might have just been gas. She assured me gas can be excruciating haha."

– TheGreyFox1122

The Eruption

"I had a cyst on my upper buttcrack for the better part of a month.. one lovely Saturday morning it’s gotten so large and swollen that I couldn’t even walk or sit down without crying in pain."

"I’m the first person to the Urgent Care that morning and find myself laying sideways on a table with a lovely Doctor using a scalpel to force an eruption of the volcano that had formed between my cheeks. It was instant relief and used probably 20 pieces of gauze to clean up."

"I’d say that one.. even worse than getting my balls ultrasound."

– Mikez63

It's All About Perspective

"My mom is an ultrasound tech. She complains that it always seem that the testicle ultrasounds always happen on her shift. Always a great conversation around the dinner table."

"You have to understand, medical professionals mentally kinda separate patients and their issues. HIPAA has kinda trained them to do this. When someone is getting an ultrasound, my mom doesn't really think of the testicles as being a part of the person if that makes any sense."

"She's not holding and prodding around someone's balls, she's holding and prodding around an object that may be causing someone pain and discomfort. She wants to help people. When she is performing one of these ultrasounds, she doesn't feel like she is in an extremely intimate position that is usually reserved for romantic partners, she is trying to help the patient feel better. Its just like a broken arm to her."

"Making fun of a patients is the last thing she would do. And of the coworkers of hers that i have met, none of them would either. None of this stuff is out of the ordinary for them. It doesn't warrant much attention."

– TJtherock

On Topic

"The time I went for a pelvic exam, and my gynecologist was rummaging around down there and suddenly asked me if I'd ever been to the Grand Canyon."

– GargleHemlock

When patients have to reveal their fanny for inspection, it's always with reservation.

Assuming The Position

"Hemorrhoids by far, I know women go through way worse at the Gyno and idk what I expected but I was not prepared to lay on my side in the fetal position while the doctor opened my a** cheeks like he was about to read a book."

– Mattrad7

Time For Class

"When I had to show my naked butt to the doctor in the hospital and she spread my butt cheeks to look inside and then a dozen student doctors (interns?) came in the room and were all staring at my butt for what felt like hours."

– modsherearebattyboys

A Wise Crack

"Post salmonella hemmorhoids. I went to my usual male doctor and told him about my painful butt things and he politely asked if I would like a female doctor to check them (I am a woman)."

"I said cheerfully 'Nah mate, all good, everyone's got a butthole!'"

"He did do the check, but I was silently asking myself the whole time...'why did you say that?? Why?'"

– lorealashblonde

Doctors visits can certainly bring out our awkward side from sheer nerves, but that's okay and is expected.

Medical experts have seen it all and they don't bat an eye over anything you might think is weird or embarrassing.

They can care less about your toxic gas or swollen ball sac.

We should all take comfort in the fact that we're literally in good hands and that all doctors only really care about making us feel better when we're not feeling our best.

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