
"Disgusting" means different things to different people. So when one Reddit user asked about disgusting birthdy parties, we kind of expected stories about roaches or something...
What we got was something else entirely.
The reddit thread asks:
Redditors of Reddit, what's the most disgusting birthday party ever you have attended?
... we're going to be honest, we were not ready for this much heartbreak and vomit.
Left Out At Her Own Party
Depends on your meaning of disgusting.
I get invited to this girl's house for a party in 4th grade. She was nice, but also wasn't popular and got teased a lot.
Anyway, everyone in our class got invited, and sure enough a lot of the popular, louder kids came to the party. The evening itself had a few set activities as far as I can remember, but nothing concrete.
This did not end up well.
After the cake was served and everyone sang happy birthday, everybody pretty much said f*ck it and did their own thing. Ignoring the birthday girl and her mother's attempts to try to get the party on track. I remember overhearing the girl crying to her mother, and the mother saying to her they wouldn't have a party at home next year.
I can't imagine how sh*tty her parents felt. Nobody should have to go through that.
Thanks, Bro
My birthday falls pretty soon after Christmas and, still, technically, within the UK pantomime season*. So, for my eighth birthday we went down the local theatre, my mum, two siblings and five or so mates in tow, for the last performance of Jack and the Beanstalk.
My mum had lovingly made goody bags for us all, crammed to the brim in sweet, sugary goodness and we settled into our row.
My brother, fat little six year old piestacker that he was, inhaled all his sweets in a frenzy before the curtain even raised and promptly projectile vomited an acrid mess of barely chewed gummy worms and melted candy f*cking everywhere. Repeated a couple more times then sat there howling.
No f*cking way my mum was going to stay sitting in the mortification of this all in the newly vomit scented seats. We were hurried out to the foyer, placed in the care of an unfortunate usher as my mum tried to beseech them, in her complete embarrassment, to give her a cleaning bucket so she could go get rid of the evidence.
They denied her request and insisted on doing it themselves (just wanted us gone in all likelihood) whilst I'm now furious because my pig of a little brother has ruined my birthday.
Piggy brother is still howling and the foyer is chaotic with confused children. Seven year old sister took a book out her bag and decided to read until the drama calmed down. Always calm and sensible that one.
We picked up KFC on the ride back and watched the Jungle Book at home instead.
I'll be 33 soon enough. Has my brother lived it down? Nope.
Birthday Bullying
I got invited to a birthday party just to get bullied.
I kept begging the parents to call my mom so I could go home and they thought I was just being a cry baby. All I remember is the kids saying I couldn't play with them and all kinds of other mean stuff which made me cry.
When I asked the parents to call my mom they all laughed and said I needed to stop crying and just go play. They probably just couldn't possibly believe their kids would ever do anything wrong. you know how some parents are.
They said I wasn't allowed to sleep with them, and the birthday bully wouldn't let me sleep with the rest of the party, so I had to sleep in her little brothers room.
I told my mom and she was so mad. I had to beg her not to call the birthday girls mom because I was afraid of getting bullied more over it.
So Unbearably Cringe
One person showed up to my 7th grade birthday party and I just wished she didn't.
It felt like it was way more sad and awkward than if no one showed and I could just cancel the whole thing. Instead, she showed up out of sheer pity and I barely knew her, which was really awkward. I had to practically beg her to come and she clearly did not want to be there.
The whole thing was kinda made worse by my mom even though my mom didnt intend it. She kept asking over and over, during my own party, why no more kids showed up.
I had to lie to her the rest were late. Meanwhile, conversation consisted of hat girl saying "yeah ok..." and various monosyllabic responses to me while constantly giving me a look of absolute pity and awkwardness, like literally, her longest sentence to me was "well I mean I'm here. So I can go now, right?".
or Me desperately trying to find any topic of convo, any, that would yield an actual response from her
or My mom constantly trying to insert herself into our interactions. That last point was quite bad too because my mom kept trying to quiz us on the friendship we didn't have.
We literally had to make sh*t up for my mom. She acted like this girl and I have been besties for years, when literally my mom only heard her name for the first time on that day itself.
It was so unbearably cringe. My mom was just trying to be nice, but straight up it looked crazy because she was trying too hard and this girl was clearly a stranger to both of us.
The girl only looked happy when she managed to flee, I then told my mom that no one else is showing up yes only one person showed up to my f*ckin party now please leave me alone. Then I locked myself in my room and cried. Fun times.
It's been years and my mom still talks about that girl she saw once as if we had been best friends lmaooo.
- ramune_0
So Much McPuke
I was 8 or 9 at the moment, one of my best friends invited me to their party.
The McDonalds where my friend hosted the party was very small, so there was 20+ kids and adults in a small cramped room, covered in black.
Everything was fine until before lunch. The room was hot as hell and I had a lot of clothes on. At that time I struggled with my blood sugar.
I was hungry, being cooked alive and felt horrible. I went to a bathroom to vomit, and there was a massive crap in there, which made me vomit fast.
Then I came back ate lunch and then we ate cake.
I had to leave early because a young cousin of my friend threw up everywhere and we all had to leave the room, ending the party.
Black Tie Toddler
I went to a birthday party for a five-year old that said "black tie" on the (engraved) invitation.
They had miniature horses, a full size elephant, a chocolate fountain, FOUR clowns, a dance crew, and a martini bar for the adults. The parents gleefully told me that it cost them over $100,000.
It was gross.
Dad Remembers It Differently
I was once assaulted by a firing squad of classmates who I was forced to invite to my party.
They were armed with silly string. That was, for some reason .supposed to be a gift for me. I think it was my 5th or 6th birthday?
They blew through about 12 cans of the stuff at once. I still despise silly string and I recently learned my dad had the delusion that it was a good time for me.
- CLTalbot
Baby Heimlich
A slightly different kind of disgusting.
I went to a one year olds first birthday and they got her a smash cake and she choked on it and they had to give her the baby version of the Heimlich and everything and it was super scary and everyone was freaking out.
The baby eventually vomited up the cake (thank god!) and then just kept vomiting everywhere for the next five minutes while her mom hugged her and cried.
Needless to say it ended shortly after. It was more scary than disgusting, but all the puke was gross I guess... yet it was so good to see the puke cuz it meant she was breathing again!
A Little Birthday Racism
My cousin is black in a mostly white family. During her birthday BBQ, one of her uncles said "let me put makeup on you!" and rubbed coal on her face.
Just...
A friend invited me to his friend´s party. My friend didn´t show up and I was stuck at this kid´s party and I didn´t know anyone. Kid´s family, the dad in particular, is very racist and fit the redneck stereotype (I´m non-white). Ended very badly with the father yelling racial slurs at ten year old me.
"It Was Disgusting, But I'm Competitive"
Well now I feel like a weirdo that people are talking about kids birthdays...
I went to a stripper themed birthday party. She even had a pole installed and a competition where guests had Monopoly money to give people who did the best. I won 3rd place.
It was disgusting but I'm competitive so I couldn't help it.
The Deal I Made To Myself
My ex polyamorous gf.
She is a bartender who never had a problem drinking me under the table, but on her birthday she got so drunk and held nothing back that it bothered me so much.
It wasn't an "it's my party" attitude, but the way she spoke to everyone (including me) reeked of desperation and megalomania - a side I had never seen in her for the two years we were dating.
We would go out and meet others together from time to time and I had never gotten jealous, but that night it was as if she was grasping and desperately trying to freely hook up.
My feelings broke the deal I made to myself and I ended it not to long after.
Cake Smash
Went to a friend's 11th birthday party. Everything went smoothly for a while and there were no problem, but when they brought out the cake and cut it up, his mother decided to jokingly smash his face into his slice.
He turned around and full-on punched her in the face. Gave her a bloody nose.
Needless to say, all hell broke loose with every adult screaming and yelling at him, and the party was called off.
I later got the present I gave him back in the mail. It was part of his punishment.
Inviting 8th Grade
One of my own was pretty disgusting.
I went to private school and absolutely hated it for so many reasons, mostly for being bullied for being the one and only "goth kid." I wanted to invite 3 or 4 friends over for my birthday. My mom always had a rule that if I invite anyone, I have to invite everyone in my class. Since I had multiple teachers for the first time, I had to invite the entire 8th grade.
So I told my actual friends they could come early so we could chill alone. We had the neighborhood pool right outside our house. My mom made a bunch of food and decorated my cake. Me and my friends were chillin, blasting Nirvana and Green Day, and swimming. We were just having fun and being our normal dorky selves.
Eventually the rich preppy kids showed up, including the really popular ones and my bullies I didn't expect to show up at all. Things were okay at first with mega hyper 8th graders. Then my mom walked over with the cake, we sang, and some of the kids wanted to eat other snacks before cake. So I suggested we should wait to eat the cake to make sure that everyone can have some. Everyone decided that was cool. My mom went back to the house.
Then, one kid decided it would be funny to get a huge handful of sour cream and onion dip and throw it at his friend. The friend was like wtf and went over to do the same thing back. Cue a disgusting sour cream and onion, salsa, cheese dip, guacamole, and whatever else fight BY THE POOL. Me and my friends are standing there like wtf is going on, all of us to shy to even know what to say. I just started to ignore them and count down the time until the party was over.
That wasn't the worst part.
Next some little sh*t grabbed the uncut Nightmare Before Christmas cake my mom hand decorated and spent hours baking/decorating on. This guy grabbed THE ENTIRE CAKE and smashed it onto the torso of his friend, knocking said friend backwards into the pool. All the bags of chips were then thrown about, dumped onto kids in the pool, etc.
I had f*cking tears in my eyes. I didn't even like most of these kids because of how rude they are at school, and now they just destroyed my cake and just being annoying and selfish. Hardly anyone even said bye or anything else to me the entire party.
My mom came over at the end of it and looked at me in disbelief. I was crying (because teenage girl lol) and she got pretty mad, even getting mad at me for not stopping them.
I was so awkward and painfully shy back then, I didn't even know what to do or say. I was mostly upset about the cake, not because I wanted any, but because my mom used to make cakes professionally and was always really into it. I always loved looking at my birthday cakes and appreciated how much effort she put into it. I love art, and it was one of the rare times each year I could see her artistic side.
So yeah. That sucked. I had to clean up everything, including the disgusting mishmash of dip, soggy chips, and cake out of the pool as best as I could.
My mom got rid of the "you have to invite everyone" rule after that.
The First Time I Met His Mom
I was about 14 and at my friend's apartment for his 15th birthday. His parents were divorced and he lived with his dad at the apartment. There were about about 6 of us boys there playing video games. About half way through the party his mom comes by to visit, and she was extremely drunk. This was the first time I had met his mom. After wishing her son a happy birthday, she started making sexual advances towards me and some of the other boys at the party. I felt so embarrassed for my friend.
Cue The Ambulance
My own at around 9 I think. One of my friends was leaning back in a chair and fell backwards into a wall. We all laughed because he seemed fine but then he put a hand on the back of his head and it came off covered in blood. He'd split his head wide open because he fell into a corner.
Cue the ambulance and several kids freaking out. One threw up. It was pretty gross.
But my birthday was the talk of the school next day. Friend was fine once he got stitches.
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The Mandela effect is when multiple people share the same, incorrect memory.
Its name stems from when paranormal researcher Fiona Broome falsely believed that the future president of South Africa, Nelson Mandela, died in prison in the 1980s.
A false memory she shared with a number of others.
Our memories have been known to deceive us, as we might frequently forget someone's name or one of our numerous online passwords.
But when we share a memory that turns out to be false with many others, convincing ourselves it wasn't the truth can be a very difficult ordeal indeed.
Redditor Mysterious_Boat_1701 was curious to hear people's most unsettling experiences with the Mandela Effect, leading them to ask:
"Which Mandela effect freaks you out the most and why?"
A mysterious gym
"Just had one personally."
"Went to a mall where there was supposedly a gym, asked around and nobody that worked at the mall knew what I was talking about."
"Looked around and couldn't find it."
"Come back a few months later and it’s right there in front of my face, you'd have to be strung out to not notice it."
"idk how or when it just appeared but it freaked me out."- prex320278
A "fruit"ful logo.
"That the fruit of the loom logo never had a cornucopia."
"What’s crazy about that one is that someone emailed the creator of the logo about it and he said even he remembers it having one."- mrcock2·
Less well intentioned than they thought.
"I Mandela effected my whole family once."
"Years ago there was a football player on a rival team that always did a dumb celebration after he got a sack and my family and I always hated it."
"One night after he did it my family started trashing the celebration and I said as a joke 'we are all going to feel terrible when we find out he is doing that celebration as a request from a make-a-wish kid'."
"Fast forward to years later and our team is playing that team again."
"The player got a sack and did the celebration."
"I rolled my eyes and said 'I hate that celebration so much' my mom instantly turned and said 'don't say that, he is doing it for a sick kid'."
"'I actually like it."
"So I was like 'what?'"
"'No there is no sick kid', my whole family then proceeded to argue with me'."
"They all vividly remembered reading articles about it, seeing special report segments before games about it, and other information."
"Some of them even thought they knew the disease the kid had and even extra details about why the kid chose that specific celebration."
"They all had these shared memories that they were sure were true."
"I was floored by all this and insisted none of that was true."
"So we looked it up.'
"Not true."
'No kid like that ever existed.'
"They still have trouble wrapping their heads around this one."
"Turned out human memory is not near as reliable as we think"
"It was American Football and the player was Jared Allen of the Minnesota Vikings and his cattle roping sack celebration."
"This was maybe 10 years ago."- AUSpartan37
His eyesight was better than we thought.
"Mr. Monopoly's monocle."- Additional_Day9903
It's not easy being green.
"I have a personal one that to this day a decade later still destroys my mind."
"I had an old(ish) 2001 dodge neon."
"With BLACK SEATS.'
"I drove this car for years and years, like 80,000 miles.'
'All through college."
"I took work breaks in my car, commuted hours every day total, to college and then the opposite direction to work and back."
"I even lived out of this thing on several occasions.'
'The day I go and trade it in, I'm pulling misc things out of the car at the dealer."
'And the seats are GREEN."
"Not even a little."
'Like very unmistakably GREEN."
"In my black Neon, with black interior, that ALWAYS HAD BLACK SEATS."
"My girlfriend then, wife now, goes oh they've always been green."
"EXCEPT THEY F*CKING WEREN'T DON'T LIE TO ME."
"This is still upsetting to this day..... life is a lie and nothing is real."- ZakuLegion
An urban legend was born.
"Not a global one, just a family thing."
"Back in 2002 my grandma had her 60th birthday, my father took us home at 10.00pm, ready for bed."
"We, me and brother, were 12 and 14 at this time."
'All went well."
"Over the years, a story was made up that we went missing after visiting the local playground after dinner at said grandma's birthday party."
"Some neighbors help to search us, the whole train of 'missing children in a smal village'-thing."
"Fun fact: we never went missing."
"Dad brought us home, put on 'Toy Story' on tv and left."
"My brother and I heard first about this in 2015.'
"From different people on different occasions."
"'Ah your one of the missing boys'."
"I first thought they were mocking me for a different event.'
"I got lost, but it was 2013, alcohol inflicted, different story."
"But then they ALL tell us the same story about us going missing."
'And the stories are damn close to 'true' in every story my mum is driving around the same neighbors to different locations to search, old wine yard, old mill etc."
"Sometimes I think I got lost on the most brutal way."
"I was lost and changed this plane of existence with another one."
"It sometimes made me think about my whole life."- tjorben123
Memories are a fascinating thing.
They can be changed or altered with even the tiniest suggestion.
And making the truth seem less believable than lies.
One last time. One last meal.
How do you chose a last meal?
Let's hope we never have to find out.
People on death row get that option.
Do they deserve it?
Whose to say?
But they have it.
A steak. A pizza... Burger King.
The food world is their oyster.
Oyster. Also an option.
The menu is endless...
Redditor No-Caterpillar4212 wanted to know what our menu choices would be if we faced the end. They asked:
"You're on a death row, you have one hour left, they ask for your final meal - what is it?"
I'd want 2 hours in a Golden Coral with a bar. Covers it all.
Years
"I want a nice filet mignon, medium rare, a baked potato with everything on it, and a nice Cabernet from a good year - I'm thinking 2135."
cleon42
"'Sorry, we couldn't get the Cabernet from 2135. So instead of what could have been a great wine request from a more plausible period of time, you get this crappy stuff we sourced from Wal-Mart. Enjoy your meal, I hope that maintaining your sense of humor was worth it."'
Until_Morning
Take Me
"Something badly cooked so I will be sick and want to die sooner and have diarrhea so bad it will be a last revenge!"
ratchet0101
"Taco bell it is!"
No-Caterpillar4212
"If Taco Bell makes you poop a lot, it's a sign that you probably need more fiber in your diet."
RDAwesome
The Yuck Factor
"A huge bowl of baked beans, a bowl of shredded wheat, a six egg omelette, and a gallon of apple cider. I'm gonna make it awful for everyone."
"Save yourself the hassle of eating all that, just ask for one pack of sugar free Haribo gummy bears. Should make for an interesting time for the folks watching you die."
MamaSweeney24
"You void your bowels when you die too so that should be lovely."
IDontControlTheFood
Perfect
"Fried chicken with some Fanta."
Aggravating-Year-776
Fried chicken is on the top of everyone's list!
Details
"150mg of MDMA. I’m dying happy."
W0nderfu1W0nder
"This should absolutely be allowed. If our leaders insist on the practice of capital punishment then the condemned should be able to ingest any substance they damn please."
forewontoi
Broken
"McFlurry. Those machine are always broken. I just bought myself some time."
Curiousuk_South9566
"Is this like an American thing? I worked at a McDonald's in Denmark once and our machine was never once broken when i was there."
oliv111
"I saw a video about this once. I'm a little fuzzy on the details but I think it has something to do with the contract that was signed in America. Only one company is allowed to do maintenance on the machines and they basically lock out if it's cleaned incorrectly. It's a crap system."
grilled-pbj
Sorry
"Cabbage!! Add some cabbage. I don’t know if an hour if enough to take effect but there was an old coworker on a cabbage diet. Omg she smelled, like it was coming out of her pores. She knew she smelled and kept apologizing and reminding us of the diet."
ImStillaPrick
The OG Always
"Olive Garden. Unlimited soup and breadsticks."
thegodfaubel
"I saw a sketch once, can't remember who it 2qs from. But a an inmate ordered the all you can eat buffet and had been eating for like 8 years. He's constantly on the toilet and takes micro-naps between bites."
KingOfTheGoobers
"Unlimited for 1 hour. Cool."
anticlockclock
How Golden
"If my grandma is still alive her potato soup and cheesecake. Hopefully I'd be able to cook said meal with her one last time."
ATLAS_IS_LOST
Let's hope none of us has to make this decision.
Most people have friends they've been close to for most of their lives.
But at the same time, friends evolve, and everyone finds themselves losing touch with any number of people they at one point considered their friends over time.
Most of the time, this isn't intentional, but just simply happens.
On rare occasions though, people might realize that their friends were not exactly who they thought they were, and didn't like who they revealed themselves to be.
Redditor One-Refrigerator69 was curious to hear stories of people who realized their friends were not exactly the nicest people to be around, leading them to ask:
"When was the moment you realized that your friends are assholes?"
Compared to others...
"When I started hanging out with better people."- Darklink326
All it took was getting my life together
"When I quit drinking ‘cos it was killing me."
"There were people I literally saw every single day who just disappeared as if by magic."
"12 years ago this week, as it happens."
"I’m not anti-drink, far from it."
"Some people, me included, just can’t enjoy it without it becoming a problem."
"Everyone is different."- bigdaftgeordie
A little perspective goes a long way.
"After I realized that other people don't sh*t on each other on every possible occasion in their circle."
"And that it isn't right when a 'friend' uses every known insecurity as an argument against you when you do not behave the way he/she would want you to."- ViscousPlateman
Lack of respect for other people's things
"I let my friend borrow my ps2 when I went to boot camp."
"When I came back, he said he sold it and gave me $50 I think?"
"This was in 2006."- madmike-86
Lack of mutual respect
"When he does sh*t to me and acts like it’s no big deal, then I do the same back and he gets offended."- Primary-Maybe-2749·
Constantly being taken advantage of.
"They only bothered with me when it suited them."
"I'd rather have nobody than have to deal with that."- zombi33mj
When they literally revealed themselves to be criminals
"When they robbed me at gunpoint."- Ok_Student8032
When they stopped liking them after a change of situation
"Fourth grade, when my parents economical situation went downhill and suddenly no one invited me to their birthday party."
"Until Seven years later no one had never invited me to their birthday, or to anything at all actually."- Justalittletoserious
Not being able to get a word in...
"When they tell me to shut up when I say anything."- the_golden_cheese
Violently playing with emotions
"She got a boyfriend and would let him listen to our phone calls and not tell me, even if I was crying about personal stuff that I would only ever tell her."
"Then they both started lying to me about my crush liking me back, forcing both him and me into awkward positions, telling everyone we liked each other so they'd play along, swapping places constantly to make us sit next to each other, pressuring him into giving me a lap dance, making him kiss the prettiest girl in the room, etc, and encouraged me to shoot my shot more and more."
"All the while they knew he didn't like me, he had told them both directly."
"One night I was crying on the phone cause I was so confused why my advances weren't working, and they just kept explaining it away, blaming some other bullsh*t reason and telling me to try again."
"The next day they told me they were laughing throughout the whole call, because I didn't get it and I was so upset."
"I should add I had no dating experience at all and nobody had ever liked me at this point."- Juliemj
It's always sad when our friends disappoint us.
But when our friends proved to be completely different people than we thought they were, it can be devastating.
As the saying goes, one never truly knows who their friends are.
When visiting any foreign country, one should always be familiar with the laws and customs of the land.
After all, what might be generally accepted on your home turf, might be frowned upon, if not illegal, elsewhere.
For that matter, even locals might need a refresher course on what they can and can't do while at home.
A recent Redditor was curious to hear what tourists and locals alike should avoid doing in the USA, leading them to ask:
"In the United States, what should you never do?"
Stay out of the skies!
"Don't fly a drone in Washington, DC."
"The whole D.C. Area is a no fly zone."
"It's a federal offense."
"Just don't do it."- PeytonCarrK
Cops can't be bribed.
"Don't try to bribe cops when you get pulled over."
"I had some Argentinian friends immediately pull out their wallets and start pooling their cash when they got pulled over once.'
"Fortunately someone in the car noticed and told them to put it away immediately."- PeytonCarrK
"Don't pay off the police."
"My dad has friends from several third-world nations where it is common practice to give the police some cash when you are pulled over."
"However, if you try to bribe a police officer here, you'll get into a lot of trouble."- JohnASmiley
Know your rights.
"Everyone, including foreigners, has the right to be silent and have a lawyer when being questioned."
"Don’t say anything."
"Also, even if you speak English fairly well, ask for an interpreter."- WickedLilThing
Enjoy all that nature has to offer... carefully!
"Don't wander off in the national parks."
"It's very real wilderness and you can get lost and die out there."
"This includes going over railings you aren't supposed to, or off trails."
"People have died accidentally falling into a steam geyser that looked like normal water, mauled by animals or left to the elements."- AlphaOhmega
Allow plenty of time!
"Expect consistency at TSA in airports."- WickedLilThing
Some terminology doesn't translate...
"If you’re from England, they’re called cigarettes here."- Yung_Onions
Make sure your license is up to date.
"If you come from a walkable country don’t come here expecting the same."
"There are some areas with good public transportation and bicycle/pedestrian friendly streets but for the most part, especially outside of cities, the areas are designed to accommodate cars more than anything else."
"The reason a lot of Americans drive everywhere is because, depending on where you live, we have no choice."- The_Cars93
Wait for instructions.
"Get out of your car and approach the cop when being stopped by a cop unless told to."- hildrash
Whether your'e waling down a street in a foreign country, or the street you've lived on for your entire life, it's always wise to be on guard and aware of your surroundings.
Not to mention, obey the law.