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We have all fallen victim to the squirm. It arises from various sources.

The cringe igniter may be a memory of yourself long ago as an unbelievably awkward human being. It could be a moment spent witnessing the brutal faux pas of another.


However it happens, all control is lost. The shoulders hunch. The teeth clench together and the skin feels like it's shrinking. Eyebrows contort into novel positions.

For some, high school contains enough revolting moments to last a life. Others can't spend five minutes on the internet without the repulsion coming around.

One Reddit question set some list-making into motion. Here's hoping the list doesn't create new, additional cringe catalysts for readers.

Ryrylx asked, "What things REALLY make you cringe?"

Non-Essential 

"Influencers asking for support during these times." -- pataconesy

"Influenzers" -- AmzHalll

"I can't wait for the whole influencer thing to die off. I always wonder about these people. Do they have a backup plan? You have maybe a few years before you are discarded by the public eye." -- Occams_l2azor

Memory is Selective, and Unmerciful

"When I remember my high school interactions in general." -- greatplains35

"I remember one instance of being alone in a hot tub with two girls who liked me (was oblivious at the time) and proceeded to just talk about going to Warped Tour with my cousin and then proceeded to invite them inside to play Halo on the Xbox." -- Griefkilla

When It’s YOU

"The time I was talking too loud at a wedding when I wasn't supposed to and everyone at the wedding turned around to see what a**hole wouldn't shut up." -- IccyOrange

"I was across a table from some friends who did this during the reception speeches because they didn't realize what was happening."

"The bride's brother is a pretty well-known actor and happened to be five feet away from them giving his speech, which he stopped in the middle to yell at them to shut up." -- BatmanandReuben

Squirming and Desperate

"When someone is obviously lying." -- thelivingomelette

"My favorite story about that is when my grandmother had her first daughter, and after she gave birth she was told to abstain from sex for a bit to let everything heal down there."

"Her next doctor's visit she was ask if she'd been abstaining as asked. She of course lied and said yes. The doctor's response to that was, 'You're pregnant.'" -- SinfullySinatra

As Good an Identity as Any, I Suppose?

"People who always post/talk about smoking pot. You smoke that's cool, I used to but Jesus if drugs are your personality you might have a problem." -- SlugFiend138

"I'm a huge pot head and I absolutely despise it when stoners do that. Its embarrassing and makes other Cannaseurs look dumb." -- PlayDontObserve

You are Not a Tap Dance Duo. Stop.

"Shared couple Facebook accounts. Specifically where they use 'n' as the middle name." -- johnnythrash

"Or when high school girls change their Facebook last name to their boyfriend's last name after like 3 days of dating." -- VayVayLaVida13

"Thought you were gonna say, 'they use the 'n' word.'" -- L9L9L9

Homegrown Cesspool

"Having to stick your hand into the nasty food water that has been sitting in the sink for several days to open the drain and when u remove your hand the pieces of fish and lettuce and dark matter that are stuck to it."

-- VENOM_10BOI

Giphy

Before Safe Spaces Were Cool

"The time I thought I was being mature about sexuality and kept trying to tell my friends that they shouldn't be afraid of masturbation, that everyone does it, and girls do it to, hey everyone let's all tell our masturbation stories.

-- Asylist

The Unforgetting, Unforgiving Internet

"My own voice, face, appearance, and my old YouTube channel that should've been annihilated to oblivion like years ago."

"Oh and also, touching textbook pages with semi-wet hands."

-- ItzJustMonika__

Making it About Them

"YouTube comment threads that are essentially an endless string of 'Who else is listening in 2020?!'" -- DeathSpiral321

"Also the 'came here from' comments where they say what new show they heard this song on." -- little_brown_bat


Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "🤐" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk him about it.

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