Millennials Share What 'The Rest Of Us' Just Don't Understand
Blaming millennials for all of the world's ills is a popular pastime of late, but the reality is that we don't have that kind of power. If we did, we would have fixed all of the things people complain about by now.
Reddit user u/GreenShirt7 asked:
50. The Avocados Are A Red HerringGiphy
What it's like to have no capital in you're 30s, and now be too old to acquire any.
Not all of us like "smashed avocado toast" (I don't even like avocado).
We're not adverse to hard work, life isn't any easier than it was when you were my age, life isn't going to get any easier when you're my age.
49. Hear Our Plea
The minimum wage has not been properly adjusted to inflation for years and as a result all of our wages are lower.
I only buy avocados when I make tacos, I don't go to Starbucks, and I don't own an iPhone. The system is broken guys...
48. Inaccessible Expectations
I'm the oldest on the millennial age spectrum, I was raised with strict rules and worked since I was 14 (THINK about it, boomer, I've already been working for 24 years now and I'm not even 40 yet). I moved out of the house with only enough to buy a bus pass, and paid rent with my first full time-job paycheck after crashing on friends' couches. I had one fork, and no knife, and when things hit the fan, food banks didn't give food to people with jobs back then so I had to call friends and ask them for help.
Skip forward to today: housing costs a fortune compared to before, taxes are incredibly high, wages have stagnated for I've now lost count of the number of years. What is my generation going to tell their children? That things will get better?
Boomers lucked out on the biggest economic boom this planet has ever seen, got good paying jobs with little experience and bought real-estate at affordable prices. They also taught their children, either directly or indirectly, that this was the norm. Turns out they were only living conditions by boomers for boomers.
I am not the care-free, spoiled and lazy persona you associate with the term « millennial ». Although at times I find myself really wishing I could be for once.
47. It's Snowing
Calling us snowflakes doesn't make us snowflakes. It makes you look like a snowflake. Back in the 20th century it was legal to discriminate against so many groups too many to name here. And you want to call millennials snowflakes lol
Spanking, yelling, and having no empathy towards children (or others for that matter) doesn't make you a giver of "tough love," it just makes you an jerk. We can look at studies — PEER-REVIEWED ONES — about how children who were abused verbally turned out.
A sub-2000-square foot house in my neighborhood costs an average of $1.4 million.
46. Just Exhausted, Babes. So Exhausted.
If you ask us a question, you don't get to reject the answer. That's what you don't understand: We'll be honest, you'll say we're whining. We'll be bitter, you'll say we're entitled. If you already know the answer why did you ask? What answer were you expecting? I'm at the point where I no longer answer questions from generations older than me; I ask them what they think the answer is, or if they'd believe me if I told them?
Sometimes it actually helps. It snaps the conversation out of casual and into focus. It makes them realize they either didn't think critically about the question they asked, or that they had preconceptions about my response before I gave it. Or I'm just told im being disrespectful and given a platitude about waiting for good things on hollow promises.
45. Boomers Love To Shirk
We have to be taught how to do things. When I was in my early teens, about 12-13, the dishwasher was full, so my parents told me to do the rest by hand, which I hadn't a clue where to even start, like I was unsure whether I fill up one side of the sink with soap and let it soak first or just apply the soap directly. I decided to ask my dad, since he was right there.
He went off explaining how I was lazy and and dumb for not knowing, when I had never been taught how. My parents constantly expected me to know how to do things without even pointing me in the right direction to start, or helping me get setup. I would understand if this was something that they had taught me before, but they hadn't. You can't just tell someone to do something they've never done before, expecting them to know how to do it and executing the task perfectly.
44. I Want To Sit
We should give Cashiers chairs. Them looking ''less professional'' will be GREATLY outclassed by the improved attitude of not standing for 8 hours.
43. We're Trying To Do Better
Tired of older generations accusing us of coddling our kids or otherwise telling us that we're raising our children poorly. We were all but ignored by our parents and want to do better by our own.
"I never let my children talk at the dinner table"
OK great, I'm sure there's no correlation between that and the fact your kid blames you for everything that went wrong in their lives to their therapist.
42. It Would Be Preferable
At 27, I've worked more then people i know in their 60s. I've worked 6-7 days a week. 12-14 hours a day for the last 7 years. I have medical bills from doing so that i now can't afford to pay, so i need to work more to pay it off. I'm so tired and burnt out, I don't have time to rest, relax, recharge, find a hobby, have friends or relationships. I just want death to come and save me.
41. It's Always A Struggle
No mom. I can not secure a 150K job (that my dad got with a high school education) with my teaching degree, post-bac and Masters degree. No, not even if I really wanted to.
Also, I really cannot afford to stay at home with my kids as I have a mortgage.. and three kids. Enough said.
40. You Ruined EverythingGiphy
Before judging the economic behaviors of millennials or calling us spoiled and entitled, please remember: Baby Boomers inherited the greatest economy in the history of our species from their parents in the 1950s-1960s, decided it wasn't good enough, and mortgaged their children's futures to keep the party going longer.
39. "I'm Not Stupid, I'm Broke."
We aren't stupid. I constantly dread the fact that I haven't started saving well for retirement, and I'm 27 y/o. Things are still on my mind even tho I haven't made any progress. But until I make some more money I'm lucky to have an emergency $1,000 lying around. So grandpa get off my back while I establish myself before judging me at thanksgiving for not having a , probably disastrous , 401k set up. I'm not stupid, I'm broke.
38. We Should Be So Lucky
Forget the jokes about us killing diamonds and Applebee's- it is NOT the case that we aren't interested in things like going to the theater, art movies, going to see live music, having a general practitioner(!?), going to museums- any time you hear someone older bemoan the fact that millennials "just aren't interested in" something that is a real cultural mainstay, it's NOT TRUE.
We have a wide body of interests and more exposure to high culture than any other generation, but on top of all our problems with wages and housing, it's SUPER expensive to regularly go out to cultural outlets. Yes, some places have low cost/free programming and we love that, but that might be one program a year.
37. The Insurance Problem
I didn't see any mention of US health insurance here. And if you have a family, a good portion of your check will easily go toward premiums and deductibles. Pay $4500 per year and another 15k out of pocket and then your insurance will finally cover something.
Meanwhile boomers have insurance they got when they were hired 30 years ago that covers everything and can't understand why we won't go to the doctor.
36. Lied To
We entered the workforce during the Great Recession. It wasn't possible to just walk into a business, apply, and get a job. The generation before us got the benefits of the 90s boom, and the generation after us is entering the workforce in the middle of a decent economy. We were also told throughout the course of our lives to do what we love and that college was essential.
It's not whining about how hard life is, it's ventin about the bad time we had and the effects that will take years or decades to get through...like enormous student loans we couldn't pay because there were no jobs and we got stupid degrees.
I didn't go to college until recently and enlisted straight out of high school, but my generation got screwed over.
35. Feeling The Bad Stuff And Choosing To Live Anyway
Being vulnerable and honest with your feelings is a good thing. Vulnerability is super difficult and it's a strength, not a weakness. A whole lot of older folks just stuff down all their "bad" feelings and sweep them under the rug.
34. We're All Going To Die
That the baby boomers and older messed up life as we know it, but will never realize because its effects aren't instantaneous. The permanent results aren't likely to be seen for a few decades, but they are in fact there and will hit the world right around the time you all die out.
33. The Economy Will Also Crash
I'm a teacher, my wife is a doctor. We still can't buy a house without help from her parents, despite having full time, good paying jobs.
I don't know who's buying boomer houses, but they're going to be in for some disappointment when they try to sell their 500K - 1M houses.
32. The New Ways To Meet People
Video games are absolutely a reasonable form of a social life. Just because I don't see these friends in person doesn't make the social aspect of our relationship any less real than that of someone I know irl.
31. No More Oppression
There isn't as much of a rise in the occurrence of certain conditions (autism, anxiety, depression, etc.), it's that thanks to better access to information, we can see and analyze the symptoms and find out who to go to for help.
Same goes for the "surge" of LGBT+ culture that I hear my elders complain about. Young people these days can tap a screen or type on a keyboard and see that they aren't alone in feeling the way they do. They find community, they embrace it, and they understand that they are not alone in being "different."
The Information Age is a double aged sword for sure, but it's raised awareness of so many things that we used to just shut up about and pretend they didn't exist.
30. Rewind (Wind Wind)Giphy
Most of us aren't entitled, most of us are very aware how extremely lucky we are to live in the time that we do. Previous generations worked hard to get us to this point in society and there's nothing that can take away from that. But why can't we improve upon what was built instead of just accepting things because "that's how it's always been". Or even worse, why does it seem like we are being forced to go backwards in terms of progress?
29. No Cheek Please
Registered Nurse Full time job 31yo After rent and bills I have 100£ a week to live on, fuel the car, feed my dogs and get groceries.
And my dad has the cheek to ask why I don't have 'savings.'
28. You're Letting Us Down
How much it totally ruins your reputation as hippies, punks, and rock icons to constantly complain about the way "the younger generation is ruining America." We might not say this often, but we looked up to previous generations - to the point of obsessively searching for nostalgia with our tastes in clothing, music and even in the resurrected ideology of past generations. Don't get a millennial started talking about vintage anything.
You're still setting an example, and the example you're setting now is "everyone turns into an old curmudgeon eventually."
27. They're Just Full Traitors
That everything that's said about us is EXACTLY what we grew up listening to our parents' generation say about Xers and now it feels really bad seeing them turn on us in exactly the same way.
Or maybe thinking about all the ways that the Xers and Boomers have pulled up the ladder that they climbed to their success and now we get sh*t on for being lazy or not caring enough.
Not sure how to word this exactly- older generations seem to label us (perhaps rightly) as materialistic and media obsessed, but it was older generations that ceaselessly advertised all this stuff to us. It's like they spent all this time trying to brainwash us to make a buck and then got mad that it worked.
25. My Mittens Aren't Attached To My Coat
We are grown ups now, so please stop treating us like we are ten. We have degrees, careers, marriages, children, and houses. It's way past time to let us be part of the decision making.
(I have some family matriarchs trying to rule with an iron fist.)
24. Give Up The Power
9/11 happened as we were graduating. A lot of us enlisted, served and died. (Us being Millennials, I personally did not enlist.)
Then those that served come home wrecked and infantilized by the general public. (2 of my brothers in law and some friends and associates, for example.)
Also, as adults, we've never known a stable economy where we had the possibility to prosper.
Our parents raised us on McDonalds and Lunchables and never set aside a dime for college, but we're called lazy and financially irresponsible. When we focus on our kids, we're criticized for coddling them. When we focus on ourselves we're selfish. We focus on our pets we're frivolous.
We'll never gain foothold until the Boomers die or decide to listen.
23. We're Not Gonna Take It
The fact that us US based Millennials grew up in the greatest country to ever exist in the 80's and 90's and we've watched greedy boomers suck the life out of it. We've watched everything we were promised get thrown out. Our bright, glimmering futures have been stolen from us by skyrocketing tuitions, medications, housing, etc. Then we get blamed for it.
22. Of Course What Really Matters Is The Blame
Telling us that we will be the ones to fix all the problems that the Baby Boomers caused.... Like you've left us barely anything to hold on to and you blame us for everything but Oh! We will fix everything ourselves... And we get blamed for why older people don't have jobs and that Millennials don't deserve jobs. I read that somewhere once in my emails and I was so livid. It isn't fair to us that we are blamed for things we can't control.
21. Begone Ye Pestilence
It's not your religion that turned me off, it's the way your fellow adherents act in its name.
Deny science, spout hateful messages about gay people, or seriously claim a 12 year old assault victim has to carry a baby to term at peril to her life?
I don't want anything to do with such disgusting people.
That it's hard, even in my early thirties with a good full time job, to afford rent and food and everything else. I wish I had been born in a time where working a job like I have now would pay for a three bedroom house and two cars. No, I'm not lazy. I just don't think I should have to work two full time jobs just to survive.
Yes! And that most jobs aren't even full time. They're either contract full time or part time so that businesses don't have to pay benefits.
Older generations: "Find what you love to do and do it!"
Also older generations: "No don't do that, you can't make a living off that."
That if I fail to get a job from multiple different places it doesn't mean I'm not trying it means the place that I tried are just picky with who they hire.
Can confirm. Recently moved states due to an emergency - put out over 40 applications in the span of a week, only received one callback and the job I did end up landing is only due to the fact that I knew someone working at the facility. :/ Looking for employment is an absolutely miserable process.
Edit: To add, I am more than qualified for the positions I applied for, but even with experience, it's just a really disheartening process.
I'm the oldest millennial. I have worked ridiculously hard, with no end in sight, to make the same money my dad, with no degree or specialized training, made and makes to this day.
I actually earn more than my dad does today.
I can't buy his house at its current price, though, whereas he did it on a single income (he started a new business) while supporting a a wife and one (eventually two) children. I'm single.
Not that this matters, because my job is hundreds of miles from his house. I can't afford houses here either.
"I paid my way through law school with a night job"
Yeah, and your law school was $450 per semester, Dennis
The whole "I had my house paid by the time i was 25" from old people.
Houses cost a whole lot less then, Barbara.
That nearly every place you apply wants you to do it online. No, going in will not help you get your foot in the door. More often than not it's just going to annoy them. Also - super annoying when people don't believe you about this so they go in and ask for an application and are told to apply online. Like..I legit could have told you this would happen.
I was at target, working behind the counter at the customer service desk, saw a guy walk in and INSIST on applying in person.
They found him a physical application and once he left they threw it in the trash. That was one of the managers who did that by the way.
Update : For clarification He walked in, asked for a physical copy, said he couldn't put in online because he didn't have a computer, the network for the store was down - He was friendly, shook hands, and had decent qualifications. They didn't care.
No, I don't find it shocking that you, your son/daughter, or your family pet got a job walking in some place. Not everyone's experience is the same. Every time I've followed up on an application, went in person, or tried to see a manager I get told to leave and that they will contact me when ready. At two places, they even put me on hold for half an hour before hanging up when I tried to follow up on an application. Call backs were rejected. Every job I've gotten involved either a phone interview followed by a start day, an online interview followed by a start day, or getting called to meet HR.
Target was just the most overt example, but nowhere I've worked has ever accepted walk-ins, taken physical anything, or let people talk to the manager about employment. For reference, I've worked big-box-store jobs, factory work, and non-chain stores. Your experience may differ, but you are the exception, not the rule. Even my local generic corner store and a new-age accessories shop want online apps, and my neighborhood family-owned pizza place has a detailed website.
that the average millennial is 30 years old, not a teenybopper or college kid.
Most people don't know the age of millennials....
To them, a millennial is someone that they hate and happens to be younger than them.
Can confirm. I saw a lady on Facebook who essentially trashed millenials in one paragraph and in the next bragged about her daughter being in a high level position at her company and working very hard after finishing college. She was convinced her daughter wasn't a millennial, even when people showed her the ranges. The discussion devolved into an argument about what the year range was.
Every time I read a thread about being a millennial, it just ends in depression.
That's the legacy our parents' generations have left us — depression and anxiety.
How to rotate a damn PDF.
CTRL + SHIFT + [Plus]
There are a lot of hotkey combinations where CTRL + [Key] is different from CTRL + SHIFT + [Key].
Some useful info: https://turbofuture.com/computers/keyboard-shortcut-keys
We didn't give ourselves participation trophies.
To put it a little more directly for anyone who doesn't understand: Criticizing the way someone was raised is a criticism of the people who raised them, not the children who had no say in the matter.
In addition, no kid ever got a participation trophy and thought "oh, this is amazing, I'm a winner!". You either didn't care about it at all or realized how much of a symbol of losing it was.
Everytime you bash millenials for taking participation ribbons remember who came up with that stupid idea. Here is a clue: it wasn't us.
Most things millennials gripe about aren't just whiny child BS, they're legitimate issues.
Employers requiring more experience for "entry level" positions
Unreal student loan debt
These are real issues. Since the average retirement age keeps increasing, these issues will only get worse.
We got some really bad advice, did everything we were asked to do, and when it didn't work we got yelled at for not doing it hard enough.
I think this is really the big one. They complain about Millennials making bad decisions and doing things wrong when they did...EXACTLY WHAT THEY WERE TOLD TO!
Boomers: Do your homework! You don't want to be flipping burgers the rest of your life!
Boomers: Study hard in school! You don't want to be flipping burgers the rest of your life!
Boomers: Get into a good college! You don't want to be flipping burgers the rest of your life!
Boomers: Go to class! You don't want to be flipping burgers the rest of your life!
Boomers: Get your degree! You don't want to be flipping burgers the rest of your life!
Millenial: "Wait, I worked my butt off did all of this! WHY THE HELL AM I FLIPPING BURGERS for a living?!?!?"
Boomer: "Are you complaining about flipping burgers?!?!?!? Your generation is so ENTITLED!"
I think we are the only gen to have grown up in both the pre-internet and internet era.
I remember growing up with VCRs and Walkman's. I remember dial-up internet when the internet was still a gimmick and not all that interesting. I remember growing up in a state of constant change. Both socially, politically and technologically.
I think this state of constant change and constant adaptation is why we do so well with technology, when our parents, just one gen earlier, grew up with a mostly analogue world, and that's why it's so hard for them to change with the world.
For better or worse, we have been given a unique way of growing up, and we are the only generation to have grown up in both 'eras' of history.
Labor jobs are not shameful and you can actually earn good money doing it. Trades are dying because we were told to go to college and then get a desk job because it's better than what mom or dad does now.
I make more money now as a 23 y/o millennial in a labor job than my parents made combined when I was growing up. But they had a large 2 story house in the burbs when I grew up and now that I make such good money they can't fathom how I still can't afford to get my own house or why I still have to drive an old beat up truck rather than have a newer vehicle and park out in a garage of a nice house. Probably because y'all screwed up the housing market and economy so bad that making 80k a year I still can barely afford to support my wife (who also works) and son (the freeloading 2 y/o that just refuses to get a job geez).
The reason older people can get away with "not being a computer/ technology person" is NOT because they are unnecessary. It's because you have your kids and grandkids to do that stuff for you. Stop putting down technology and maybe just say thank you to them.
Millennials are not one homogenous group.
Some are successful, some are struggling.
Some are urban, some are rural.
Some have college education, some do not.
Some live with their parents, some live alone.
Some have marriage and kids, some are single.
Generalizing an entire generation makes it an "us vs them" argument, that you assume everyone is on one side or the other. Don't fall for this bs.
If someone is an entitled person, it's not because they're a millennial, it's because they're an entitled. It's not a generational thing.
Stop projecting societal frustrations on people who happened to be born in a different year than you, and realize that if you accept and address the real issues of societal change, we're all better off.
Burnout. You can't forget burnout, it's basically the millennial condition.
We work because we need to. We get tired of working. But we get paid jack and our benefits are we have a 50/50 chance of our two weeks notice turning into immediate termination. We can't stop because something like 40% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck to the point where they'd struggle to come up with $200 in an emergency.
Minimum wage hasn't increased in decades, college tuition and textbook price increases have increased wildly, and when it's all said and done older generations call us lazy and greedy for wanting any part of the American dream because the whole thing is only attainable by the rich who are taxed lower than ever.
The economy is growing but our paychecks are not.
Economists will tell you that wages generally increase with productivity – that you're paid in line with the value of what you do.
Related to this, that a $20K salary today is not equal to a $20K salary decades ago.
This is so important. I had a VP laugh when I told them we needed to pay someone $60k minimum for a position I was tasked with replacing that had previously been budgeted at $42k. I had to work with the CFO and fight tooth and nail, and they finally asked our payroll company to estimate the job value. When it came back $72k, they immediately approved $60k with benefits without question.
We had a really awkward situation hiring last year where every applicant for a junior position were requesting $10-15k more than the manager that was hiring the position. They ultimately had to opt to go with a 22 year old straight out of college to get the rate. She's a rockstar, but that incident kicked off a huge company salary assessment.
MS Word is not a design program and shouldn't be used as one.
Also, powerpoint is also not a design program.
And if you’re going to use powerpoint as a design program, please at least export it as a pdf.
Reddit user Little-Two6210 asked: 'F*ck "Money can't buy happiness" BS, what did you buy that made you so much happier?'
Happiness is relative.
The idea that money can't buy happiness sounds good, but the reality is money can buy many things that contribute to our overall well-being.
And isn't comfort happiness?
Reddit user Little-Two6210 asked:
"F*ck 'Money can't buy happiness' BS, what did you buy that made you so much happier?"
"My rice cooker."
"I always bought the cheapo $20 rice cooker and they’d under/overcook the rice and then eventually burn up and die."
"Saved up my pennies a few years ago and bought a nice Zojirushi model and it has been amazing. Absolutely love the Keep Warm function and the little song it sings when it starts/stops cooking."
"I was so impressed that I bought one for my mom who also loves rice with every meal. First she said 'oh honey it’s too expensive, take it back!'."
"Then she used it and refuses to 'give it back'. These cookers are absolute workhorses."
"I moved into my sister's old house (family land) when she moved in with her boyfriend and just assumed she'd be back 'any day now'."
"Well, I slept on a 'floor mattress'/cot for a year before I accepted that it was okay to start making it my home, bought sheets, pillows, blankets, everything and holy sh*t it changes how sore you feel in the morning."
"Same, except my dog is a cat."
"So much this. I really feel like the only unconditional love relationship I've had in my life has been with my pets."
"I realize that's kind of a pathetic statement, but I'm grateful to have found that type of love in some way."
"My first piano. It changed my life."
"For me it was my first acoustic. I had been playing for a decade on electric."
"Discovering how to use tone- and the beauty that tone carries- was magical."
"Flight tickets to Barcelona. I landed, had a blast, contemplated 'forgetting' to leave."
"Wandering around the city, losing myself in thought in the Gothic Quarter, sitting on a fontain's edge at a square."
"Barcelona is one of my favourite cities. I rarely go there because the flight is rather long, but Athens is a good subtitute for a weekend getaway."
"I ruined my teeth thanks to depression and poor self-care."
"Money paid for my teeth to be fixed and my confidence improved so much."
"Walking is dope."
"I don't have a lot of money so it makes me so happy when I buy anything."
"Like the other day, I got sushi, it was awesome."
"And I got a beautiful comfy beanie."
"Makes me so happy I'm wearing it now. Keeps me warm."
"When I was poor, like super poor, anything was the world to me!"
"My set of cheap pots and pans from Walmart, my first tv (small but awesome!) my first set of not donated sheets, my first new pillows, my first set of new flatware, a lot of firsts."
"My own apartment."
"Feel like my parents, siblings and myself get along better after everyone got their own place."
"Having your own space to just shut off and not be bothered takes such a huge load off."
"Time—help with housekeeping has been invaluable to keeping a sane household while working."
"Services...which to me is essentially buying time."
"So paying to have laundry washed dried & folded has brought me more joy than anyone could ever imagine. Or cleaning service for my house so that I can do other things."
"I've actually noticed that I'm much less grumpy when I don't have to do as much of my own house work."
"I can be so productive with other things I really need to do."
"What is one thing that is the great equalizer between rich and poor people? Time. No amount of money in the world can buy someone time."
"We all have 24 hours days and we will all eventually die. The one thing in this world rich people cannot buy is time."
"So they spend their money conserving time."
"It's why they travel in private jets, have chauffeurs driving them around, a cook who makes their meals, a cleaner for their home, and personal assistants to take care of mundane tasks."
"They cannot buy more time. Only use their money to conserve what time they do have."
"The most important thing money can buy is choice."
"With enough money you can choose to walk away from a sh*tty job or a toxic relationship."
"You can still walk away without money but it’s SO MUCH harder."
"Peace of mind.
"I grew up dirt poor."
"But I’ve had a pretty successful career. Unfortunately, my family has accumulated a lot of medical debt."
"And despite me having a low six figure income, we were living a low income life and worrying constantly about money and spiraling debt."
"The state I live in is very conservative, which translates to a general stance of 'f*ck poor people', despite being one of the poorest states in the country. So it took my spouse, who is a textbook case for the type of person for whom disability is intended, 7 years to finally get approved."
"After that, and refinancing the house, we’re no longer spiraling further into debt. We’re debt free except for the mortgage. And we’re actually growing our savings account."
"I can contribute to a retirement account now. And while we’re far from rich, the sheer relief I’ve been feeling for the last few months is just amazing."
What things have you bought that contributed to your happiness?
We've all heard that love and work do not mix, and we've definitely heard that we shouldn't take relationships or friendships with coworkers to the next level.
Between having our work, our jobs, our income, and maybe even our reputations on the line, there's simply too much at risk.
But maybe sometimes, the affair won't turn out quite the way we expected.
Redditor Nuff-Do asked:
"People who had sex with coworkers, how did that turn out?"
Rewarded with a Trip to Italy
"I was a young Airman at my first base in California and I worked with a girl (let's call her Sarah) who was way more attractive than anyone my small-town Missouri a** had ever hooked up with before."
"For some reason, she was into me. She was into a few other dudes too, but at the time it didn't matter because I was 19 and stupid and she was a few years older and far more sexually experienced than I was. We had sex a few times and sort of 'dated,' but it didn't really go anywhere and I was heartbroken but cool with it."
"This was right after 9/11, so U.S. military operations were starting to ramp up and Sarah got deployment orders. They didn't tell her where she was going, but she was on the hook."
"Her reaction to the news was to tell our Chief that she was pregnant with my kid so she didn't have to go. I knew she wasn't pregnant and just using it as an excuse not to deploy."
"The Chief came to me and asked if I'd go in her place. As I said, I was 19 and even though I was a little scared, I signed the dotted line and told him of course I'd take the deployment."
"It turns out, the 'deployment' was to a NATO base in Naples Italy where I'd be paid about 80 dollars per day per diem on top of my normal paycheck."
"As soon as Sarah found out where I was headed, she called the Chief and told him she wasn't pregnant anymore and would like to take the deployment."
"The Chief denied her request and I spent an amazing eight months in Italy, being paid more money than I knew how to spend and having the time of my life."
Watching Them Move On
"We met thru work and dated for one and a half years. She cheated with another coworker who is married. We broke up. She started to date a different coworker. Not the married one. She paraded that relationship in my face."
"Everything was great until it wasn't. It really f**ked over my self-esteem and self-worth for years. It sucked that I had front row seat to her moving on."
"I feel that last part. When my ex moved out, she did it slowly over the course of like a month. She came over every day and packed up slowly until she finally got everything."
"The worst day was when she finally came and took her cat. I still remember sitting in front of the door and crying for hours after she left that day."
"There's a band called Pedro the Lion that has this lyric, 'My old man always swore that hell would have no flame. Just a front-row seat to watch your true love pack her things and drive away.'"
"When I kicked my ex out this summer for having cheated on me, I gave her an arguably unfair timeline to leave before all of her possessions just went outside, and packed and moved everything for her to the garage overnight, since I couldn't sleep anyways."
"This is why. I simply couldn't handle those constant reminders and wanted it done and gone as fast as possible."
A Messy Breakup
"I had resigned and was leaving the company anyway but it was one of those classic hookups at a company party. We had fun for a while but then she decided to stop seeing me."
"I'm glad I had left the company by then; otherwise, things would have been messy."
A Huge Theft Ring
"I got fired and she got fired and all 20 guys she f**ked while we were dating were fired."
"I got fired under false allegations because she was my girlfriend and she was stealing from the store."
"She got fired for stealing from the store."
"The other 20 were fired because it was brought up that she was stealing and sleeping with managers and other coworkers while in a relationship with me. They thought that me and her were the center of a theft ring."
"Like, no... I don't steal so."
A Promotion for Everyone
"So my wife of over 10 years, who had cheated in the past and I forgave her, got a huge promotion at work which caused us to relocate."
"I guess she got tired of me because she kicked me out and we were getting a divorce."
"Four months later, I found out that a co-worker had a thing for me, so I took my shot. The sex was amazing. It could be that it’s been a long time for me since sex with the wife was basically non-existent for the last few years of marriage."
"Me and the co-worker have now been dating for over a year and I haven’t been happier. So for me, it worked out for the best. And the sex is still great!"
Too Many Options
"I worked at a casino as the only male cocktail waiter/bartender (roughly eight cocktail waitresses and four female bartenders). The floor was mostly women between the bar, servers, restaurant, and dealers."
"I slept with one of the cocktail waitresses for a couple of months even though I knew I had a bigger crush on her than she did on me. I also knew I didn't really want a relationship with her for a couple of reasons."
"Evidently, she told some people and gave me good reviews. After she quit and moved away, I had more interest than I really knew what to do with and kinda just went for it with anyone who showed interest that I was attracted to as I knew I had no more than a year left there no matter what happened. I ended up with four more of them over the course of a couple of months."
"One time on a shift, I looked around and all four were on the floor somewhere. All knew each other but I'm not sure any knew about the whole situation, and none were any false impressions of a relationship as far as I know so nothing bad came of it."
A Family Man
"Not me, but she was working in payroll and he was a security guard. One day, a coworker saw the security guard walking her to her car. Immediately, she was transferred to another branch. However, they continued to see each other."
"Soon after, they got married after finding out she got pregnant. In the next five years, they had three daughters, with me being the youngest. My dad ended up passing away from brain cancer when I was just a toddler."
The Downfall of a Friendship
"I had one good experience one bad. The first one we ended up dating for a year and a half. We had a ton of fun sneaking around at work, and even though in the end he totally broke my heart, it wasn't a bad experience."
"The second one was very bad. Do not recommend."
"I thought he would be safer because we were friends, so I figured communication and rules would be no problem. Instead, we didn't communicate at all because we were both so worried about hurting each other's feelings."
"It ended badly with major assumptions on both ends and now it's very awkward and uncomfortable."
"It makes me sad because honestly, I just miss my friend. While the experience can be fun, I don't recommend it."
A Suspicious Relocation
"Pretty fine. We worked at different locations in the company the first time we slept together, but we knew each other as she had trained at my location."
"One night we ran into each other at the bar and one thing led to another. A couple of months later, I ended up getting transferred to the location she was at and we just acted like it never happened."
"After a month or two of working together, we ran into each other again at the same bar, and history repeated itself."
"There was a slightly awkward moment a couple of days later when I had to find a way to give her back the necklace she'd left at my place without anybody noticing, but other than that, our working relationship didn't change at all."
Messy Feelings Everywhere
"First time: super fun but I got more attached than she did."
"Second time: kinda fun but she got more attached than I did."
"Moral of the story: don’t f**k coworkers unless you’re SUPER SURE."
"We dated for over a year and then one day she randomly decided to break my heart. Thankfully, we had stopped working together by that point. It still makes me tear up thinking about her, though."
Best Decision Ever
"We had an instant connection the moment she joined the foundation I had been working at for a year. We worked at the front desk together and we got to know each other very quickly."
"Neither of us enjoyed small talk and we would get angry emails from our unbelievably incompetent manager about the amount of laughter coming from the front desk. We got all of our work done, and then some, our manager just felt like she was getting left out. Which our manager was, but it was because she sucked."
"I worked from home four days a week before my new coworker started and a few weeks later she asked me why I was coming in every day. I told her something about training her how to answer the phones, which she instantly knew was bullsh*t (we got four calls a day, max)."
"The first time we hung out outside of work we told each other it would be a terrible idea to date. That lasted for about 10 days. The next time we hung out we slept together."
"That was a year and a half ago."
"We left the foundation after she told our manager that her 'management style' was untenable in an email. The two of us then called a meeting with her and we laid out a very well-planned strategy for departmental growth and change."
"Our manager nodded her head the whole meeting and told us how proud of us she was for taking ownership of our careers and how excited she was to implement our new plan."
"Three weeks later, they fired my coworker. They pushed me out, telling me that they no longer had a place for me (at my review the previous year, the CEO told me herself that she believed I had CEO potential)."
"We both have new jobs, she is a high school English teacher at one of the best high schools in the country and I became a private investigator."
"Her dad and I go to college football games together and our moms get lunch and do spa dates."
"We have been showing each other how to heal and grow as individuals and as partners."
"Right now, she's sleeping in my bedroom while I type this in the living room. I don't know what the future holds for us but I do know that she's the love of my life."
"Sleeping with my coworker is the best thing I've ever done."
"Marry this girl already."
Redefining the Coworker
"Pretty good. We have a kid together. Granted we'd been married for seven years before we became coworkers."
"She always wanted to teach at the same school as me. The school grew enough that it needed a dedicated English teacher. She has a master's in it so it worked out."
A Slow Transition
"We worked together for a couple of years and became close friends before we crossed the romance line one night after a lot of drinks. Honestly, it was and still is amazing. Happily married now over 15 years with two kids."
A Bartender's Love Story
"She's sleeping next to me, cuddling our cat."
"Turns out our chemistry working behind the bar together was also amazing outside of work."
We've all heard that love and work don't mix, and that we absolutely shouldn't get close to our coworkers, but from these Redditors, it seems that while things could get messy, sometimes it's worth the risk.
It's not attractive to gloat.
And there is little more obnoxious than flaunting how wealthy you are.
Particularly if you aren't even that wealthy to begin with.
Indeed, perhaps to make themselves feel more powerful and important than they actually are, many people will try and show off how much money they have in what they wear, eat, live in, and drive.
However, not everyone is so easily fooled, as those in the know can detect a charlatan when they see one.
Redditor aloe_veracity16 was eager to hear the dead giveaways that someone might not be as wealthy as they appear, leading them to ask:
"What’s a dead giveaway that someone is not actually as wealthy as they claim?"
Stating The Obvious...
"When they constantly talk about how wealthy they are."
"A genius doesn't need to tell you they are smart."
"An athlete doesn't need to tell you they are fit."
"And a rich person shouldn't need to tell you they are wealthy."- TigLyon
Attracting Unwanted Attention...
"90% of the wealthy shut the f**k about it, because they learn once they start making good money everyone wants a piece."
"Talking about it constantly = broke AF."- Vladtehwood
Simply By Doing It...
"Making the claim at all is a dead giveaway."- Starfox41
In Plain Sight...
"People who actually ARE wealthy mostly try to hide it."- Matt7738
"Living In A Material World..."
"I'm not well-versed in judging someone's wealth, but I do notice that the fake rich only look rich on social media and try their hardest to go to popular locations celebrities post."
"I know a couple of friends of friends who took out a loan just to keep up the facade that they're all in on the latest iPhones and wearables."
"They built a persona of being a rich kid, so now they have to stay the course."- anima99
Flaunt Modesty, Not Wealth...
"As a person which knows many very rich people."
"I can guarantee that not a single one of them wants to be known as rich."- CompetitivePause9033Schitts Creek Flirt GIF by CBCGiphy
We Heard You The First Time!!!
"When they repeatedly and adamantly tell you how wealthy they are."- Famous_Bit_5119·
Experiences Over Stuff!
"I feel like actual rich people prioritize vacations/travel, buying their kids cars, paying for their kids/grandkids tuition."
"They don’t spend money on flashy or luxury stuff as much."- KleseaSummer Time GIF by Merge MansionGiphy
All In The Editing...
"Ever notice how those jet setting influencers that post their pictures out of the airplane window are behind the wing?"
"They're in coach."
"The picture in business is where they stopped to pose on the way through."- Turbulent-Ask-2633
"Private Jet pilot friend of mine said for the slightly wealthy they bring loads of luggage."
"The ultra rich bring a day bag they have enough money to buy clothes when they get there or already have clothes waiting on them."- hadmeatgotmilk
The Less Said...
"I never met a wealthy person that talks about it."
"They don't need to."- 181Eclipse·Christina Moses Secrets GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy
"See The Pyramid [SCHEMES!] Along The Way..."
"They make a goofy advertisement for some book or course that 'will help you get rich too!'"
"If they were actually rich, they would be on some tropical beach engaging in whatever vices they enjoy most-not hocking some get-rich-quick scheme."- illegalopinion3
All About The Simple Things...
"My dad's entire job is managing millionaire / billionaire philanthropy accounts, so I’ve grown up surrounded by some of the wealthiest people in the country."
"And I never knew until I got older how these 'Mr. Smith' and 'Ms. Jones' people that I’d grown up hanging out with were anything above upper middle class."
"Normal clothes, modest homes, very down to earth and funny people."
"Big wealth, and especially old wealth, is quiet wealth."- Travel_and_Tea·
Anything But Proud...
"I have a family member who insists she and her husband are upper middle class."
"She’s rich (8 figures), but it hurts her in some sort of primal way to acknowledge that."
"Her adult brother is also wealthy, although not as much as his sister."
"Likely also 8 figures."
"He insists he’s blue collar and middle class."
"There’s something in their upbringing that makes them ashamed of having 'made it' financially."- strangled_spaghettiBlue Collar Work GIF by Pudgy PenguinsGiphy
People will try to come off as wealthier than they are for a multitude of reasons.
But just like any facade, keeping it up eventually becomes untenable.
This is why it's always most important to be grateful for the things you have, rather than flaunt what you wish you had.
When it comes to dating, I have my mental checklist. The guy must be kind, intelligent, funny, and a movie buff. He must be adventurous but also doesn't mind a Netflix and Chill date night.
Most of this is similar to the mental checklists other people have. Of course, I can be flexible. If someone is nice and I'm having fun with them, they don't necessarily have to check all the boxes.
However, I have one specific dating restriction that is a dealbreaker regardless of how many boxes the person checks, and that's religion. I've never been a fan, and now I'm an atheist, and I would want my partner to be as well. That's because I want kids, and the last thing I want is for us to argue about how to raise the kids when it comes to religion.
I'm not the only person who has one specific dating restriction. Everyone has that one thing that is a dealbreaker when it comes to a romantic relationship. Redditors certainly do, and they are ready to share.
It all started when Redditor AceofSpadesYT asked:
"What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?"
It's Just A Joke!
"No cruel or rude pranks."
"I saw a post by someone whose boyfriend "pranked" her by pretending to be dead on the kitchen floor. That is exactly how she had found her previous partner, dead on the kitchen floor, which her current boyfriend knew. He was surprised she dumped him and didn't think it was funny."
We're (Not) Gonna Party!
"No party people. Nothing wrong with it, I just ain't dealing with that sh*t."
"True. I like planning weekend stuff, but it has to be something meaningful - visiting a different city, movie marathon, mountain hike, fancy lunch, all okay. But... clubbing and drinking? How f**king old are we, 19? No thank you, I'm old and have no energy for listening to music I don't like while being surrounded by 50 people that I don't give a single half of a sh*t about."
"Same sense of humor. I have 0 interest sharing physical space with someone who doesn't laugh with me."
My Ears Are Bleeding!
"I'm a light sleeper. I cannot date a snorer. I can hear snores through ear plugs AND a fan blowing. It's not you, it's me."
At that point, it does sound like them 😂
"Have a f**king job."
"Found this difficult when I was funemployed. Was fortunate enough to be able to live off savings for a bit."
"People reacted oddly to it. “But what do you do???”"
"Was dating at the same time and some girls had the same sentiment. “You don’t have a job?”"
"I had a good enough job that I didn’t need one anymore. And one lined up 8 months from then. But there were two girls specifically who treated it as a deal breaker."
"I had a similar situation. I worked a high-paying job for a few years that demanded a ton of my time and had crazy hours. It burnt me out badly and I lived off of the savings from that job for a while and tried to date now that I actually had free time. I had more money in my bank account during that time than at any other point in my life but so many people were put off by me being funemployed and assumed I was looking to leech. But I guess there’s really no way to know someone's history and hard not to assume. Now I work full-time and have way less money overall but it looks better..."
"No smoking. Ever. I'm not kissing an ashtray, or smelling an ashtray. Instant turn off."
"100% I broke up with an old gf because she started smoking behind my back knowing I’ve got asthma and it was always a hard pass. She thought I was joking but it showed me that she was also untrustworthy."
That'll Do It
"I guess my husband restricts my dating."
"My wife has the same rule. But the jokes on her, I get around it by dating her!"
"Must like dinosaurs."
"That goes without saying."
What's In A Name?
"Cannot have the same name as any of my relatives."
"My last ex had the same name as my Dad and I reeeeeeaally didn't like it. So, fair."
"If they’re rude to people they’ll never see again (Waitstaff, cashiers, etc) I’m out."
"I can’t respect anyone who doesn’t respect themselves, and when you’re not polite to people you’re disrespecting yourself."
God Only Knows
"When I was dating, you had to be an atheist. I don't mess with religion. And I genuinely just don't think atheists + religious people work out."
"And I know... There's going to be someone who comments (assuming there are enough upvotes) who says "I worked out with my spouse who's religious and I'm not!" but you're the exception. When it comes to making decisions long-term, how to spend your money, where you think you'll go after you die, not to mention basic morality (!), and if you have children - that's a huge hurdle."
"We worked it out. It's absolutely an exception and not the rule. Don't do it if you can avoid it."
Let's Move Tonight (Literally)
"They need to be ok with cold weather."
"I grew up in the north, live in the south, and I'm tolerating it until I can move back north. If someone says they hate the cold it's an instant turn-off because I don't want to drag someone into a climate they hate."
"The same thing also applies to walkability. I want to move somewhere walkable, and I hope to meet someone with that same goal rather than try to talk them into it."
"Let me know when you find this mythical northern walkable community."
My Purr-fect Match
"Cat has to approve."
"They need to be male. Kind of important."
"So weird, I want the complete opposite."
Yeah, the male thing is kind of important for me too!
Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments.