black and white cat with mouth open looking at computer tablet
Kanashi on Unsplash

People need to stop throwing out unwanted advice.

And when it is requested, think before you speak.

People with mental disorders don't need everyone telling them they have a fix like "exercise" or "herbal supplements."

Redditor Gold-Ad-2827 asked:

"People with mental disorders: What do you hate being told the most?"

I hated being told to just smile. You smile and go away.


seth meyers GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy

"It's all in your head. Where else would it?! My colon?"


Don't Minimize

"Everybody goes through that."


"This saying makes my blood boil. Or the 'I was that age once too ya know' yeah no sh*t you were that age once. And just because you were that age once doesn’t mean we have the same experience."


"They try to minimize it."


Stellar Advice

"You're worried? Just stop."

"You're sad? Just don't be."

"You're compulsively binge eating? Eat less."

"Thanks for that stellar advice."


"Or even better, 'Just do it!' As if ADHD paralysis can be stopped with a can-do attitude."


"physical health"

"I get so frustrated when people treat the idea of 'holistic medicine' as some kind of woo. How does it escape so many people that the body works holistically? Even a lot of doctors seem to ignore this. It's very frustrating when you have 2 or 3 or 4 illnesses that are all affecting each other, and your 'physical health' is held distinct from your mental health, and nothing anyone is doing to treat you works because no one's looking at the whole system."

"I just got a lecture from a psychiatrist I am seeing about nutrition, and he apologized to me for doing so but I told him, 'No, I appreciate it. Do it for all your patients.' because it told me he's trying to look at the whole picture and actually fix what's wrong. It gave me faith in him."



Calm Down Golden Girls GIF by TV LandGiphy

"You need to calm down."


"Never is the history of calm down has calm down ever caused anyone to calm down."


Calm down. I hate that one. You calm down.


Season 23 Reaction GIF by Law & OrderGiphy

"When they try to give me tips on what to do, like bruh as if I didn't already try that."


The Standard

"You don't look sad. No crap... that's so I can avoid having this conversation. Also depression isn't 'being sad' like people think."


"God, I hate this. It's because saying 'I'm depressed' has been standard for people expressing that they're slightly unhappy about something dumb like not getting enough croutons on their salad or some crap. Now that's just what everyone assumes you mean when you say you have depression."


Be Faster

"'Stop being lazy.'"


“'Lazy' is when you don’t want to do anything at all. 'Executive disfunction' is when you can do everything at all, but that one easy quick thing that you do want to do just makes you and your brain freeze completely days ahead. I’m tired of people not understand that even when I explain and look at me like I’m bullshitting instead."


Ways to Cope

"Maybe you should try praying harder. I did, He prescribed medication."


"Praying is a way to cope for a lot of people, I think. That's totally fine, but insisting on praying in lieu of getting real help or actually addressing the issue is when it is not only unhelpful, but dangerously detrimental."


"Religious people will bypass everyone’s cultures, identity, views, and feelings just to be right and make a point. it’s disgusting. I read somewhere that real so called Christianity is all wrong. The real faith is from the Aramaic history and all the meanings were misinterpreted and the stories and all were made up by Catholics wanting to control their people. Yuck."



Disgusted Season 6 GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy

"As someone with OCD with a lot of attention to 'contamination', having someone try to explain contradictions in why I'm doing something that is technically unclean when I wouldn't do something that is technically clean due to OCD. There are a few doorknobs that I will not touch no matter how much you clean them in front of me and I know it makes no sense, if it made sense I wouldn't have OCD i'd just be cleanly."


Stop trying to be an armchair therapist. Be empathetic to people first.