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Men Share Their Deal Breakers For A Potential Relationship

Men Share Their Deal Breakers For A Potential Relationship
Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Dating can be one heck of a fiasco, especially these days, in the time of COVID. Everybody is looking for something different and nobody seems to be on the same page.

Now there are two sides to every story but today we wanna here from the men out there. Everybody has a breaking point when the red flags finally add up to trouble. And y'all know what to do when trouble comes calling?

Run.

Redditor u/JaJaLoHawanted the gents out there to share with us about their love lines in the sand, by asking:

Men, what are some deal breakers for a potential relationship?

Compromise is important in a relationship. Everybody has to do it. But there are just some traits or actions that a big no-go when it comes to compromise. And you shouldn't feel bad about it.

Sorry

Sorry I Love Lucy GIF by Paramount+Giphy

"Not being able to apologize. Everybody makes mistakes, doesn't matter. Own up to it and I respect you even more. Seek excuses? Bye!"

- Attygalle

Own It!

"No accountability. In fact, having absolutely no sense of accountability for their actions. Believe me it is more common than you think."

- Embarrassed_Fig_6291

"My ex was just like this- I found myself apologizing for her mistakes, and she expected me to grovel when I made any minor error. And the gaslighting, mind games and guilt trips... holy crap. When I called her out, I was "lecturing her." I thank my lucky stars that I had the sense to get out when I did."

- all_teh_sandwiches

Cheer Up!

"Complaining about everything."

- Paranoides

"My ex too. It was unbelievably draining. I could handle it most of the time, but the worst was when in a situation where everyone is miserable (e.g. getting stuck outside in the rain). It's like, hey, everyone here is having a bad time right now, but by complaining constantly you're just dumping more misery on top of it for everyone."

- ZoltanBattery

The Menu

"Kind of a subset of this for me is being a picky eater. I dated a girls for over two years who ate nothing but macaroni and cheese and chicken tenders. Never freaking again. I've broken it off with two otherwise very nice and attractive girls over this. I'm not spending my life restricted to restaurants that sell chicken tenders and having to grocery shop for two different dinners every single night."

- username deleted

Fibs...

Lying Simon Rex GIF by Simon Rex / Dirt NastyGiphy

"Lying, saying stuff about you behind your back, being mean to people for no reason, being fake."

- sproolsy5

Ladies, ladies, ladies... listen up. Now don't think men aren't just as culpable, but y'all ain't perfect. Don't lie, start there. Shall we learn more?

Failed

fail black and white GIFGiphy

"No "test" behaviour. Be straightforward or I'll assume you're likely to instigate dumb crap drama. Honesty for honesty."

- Thatguyinthebottle

"red flag"

"Doesn't let you have time to yourself/ heir entire life revolves around you to the point that they suffocate you."

- jalo12

"To add on - if a partner is controlling of your relationships with friends and family, and generally won't let you exist as your own person, "red flag" is understating it. You should be able to at least occasionally do things without your partner."

"You should be able to have private spaces and private thoughts. You should be able to maintain existing relationships and create new ones. I dated someone once who was insistent as to how I slept, and didn't like it if I tried to get into a more comfortable position. Surprise surprise, also came with a side of emotional abuse and manipulation."

- Kradget

911 Operators Break Down The Strangest Call They've Ever Received | George Takei’s Oh Myyy

Basics

"Zero effort put into simple maintenance actions. Simply picking up after yourself is deferred repeatedly when it can be done and over in ten seconds. Inflexible mind, or unwilling to learn new things or see other perspectives. Seeing the fault in others, but inability to perceive such in themselves."

- virgilreality

Counting Ability

"If they are terrible with finances."

- notwithagoat

"Money is cited in the top 3 reasons for divorce, always. And money affects every facet of life. My BIL married a gal who was always a next thing away from getting her financial sh*t together. Anyway, he's living with us now, after his 2-year marriage ended, because, it turns out, people who are bad with money and have no real interest in saving, likely will not change."

- abqkat

try to be fun...

John C Mcginley Reaction GIFGiphy

"No sense of humor. Either a lack of sense of humor or incompatible sense of humor. I want to be able to laugh at the same stuff together."

- SnarkyRogue

Be Civilized

"If you can't have a civilized argument with them. If small differences at the start of the relationship already turn into screaming, shouting, insulting etc. just think about how those important discussions later in the relationship will go."

- PhobosDeimosX

"This is a pretty big deal. It goes hand in hand with escalating small problems. What could've ended with "oh ok, I'm sorry" turns into "are you calling me stupid" and that turns into "no! You're stupid, and everything about you is stupid!"

"Some folks don't know how to approach a problem aside scream at it. Or if it's a personal problem, they flip it into a personal attack. This is someone that both does not know how to see a problem, let alone address it. Not enough emotional maturity to hold a healthy relationship."

- similar_observation

Disrespect...

"Lack of respect for my boundaries. I learned this lesson the hard way once, I've got no intention of letting it happen again. "Tests" and indirect behavior. If you want something tell me. I'm not playing a game just to see if I'm "worth" your attention. You don't treat the things I care about or respect seriously. It shows me you won't even put in the effort to act like you care. The idea of "I don't have to bring anything to the table and you have to bring everything."

"If you're a deadbeat leech I'm not interested in wasting my time on you. If they breathe their politics too loudly. I'm fully open to someone who doesn't perfectly align to my idea of a worldview but if they're super loud about it that looks incredibly cringy and tactless. I don't care if it's for something I agree with or not. There's more to life than mindless tribalism."

- AleksandrNevsky

Behind the Back

Fuck You Season 4 GIF by FriendsGiphy

"Seeing how they speak to other people, especially when they aren't around, if they crap talk their friends when they aren't around why would you think they wouldn't do that to you as well. Also, if they can't keep a secret."

- AL_drew

Too Much

"A girl I work with said she had to make her boyfriend have fights with her because he wouldn't before. She said she told him "look this isn't gonna work if you won't get into arguments with me." It sounded to me like a relationship with her would be very toxic."

- Poopoodl

"I had a boyfriend in college who complained that I didn't get angry or fight with him. Before me he was dating an older girl who had two kids and she was abusive. She would show up to his house randomly and they would fight/scream at each other all the time. I guess he thought that's what love looked like. I just wanted peace and someone to have sex with looool."

- BeverlyHillsAddict

Look into my Eyes

"They spend 90% of their free time sat on their phone but get annoyed when you play a few hours of PlayStation to relax."

- Artichoke19

"Yeah that's some people in general, My best mate since childhood moved to another country and was always "so busy", took hours, sometimes days to reply a simple message, but when he came to visit he was on the phone 95% of the time. To the point where it was hard to maintain a conversation (in person) because he's busy in the phone. Oh but when THEY need something from you, suddenly they are the chattiest people around and answer in miliseconds. I don't even bother anymore."

- Dynamicphone

Themselves

"Huge red flag when they ask you for every little detail when you've been somewhere without them i.e out with friends or something, and basically accusing you of cheating then getting overly defensive and secretive (showing really strong cheater signs) themselves."

- gamingninja12

All about them!

Jane Birkin Dancing GIF by Film at Lincoln CenterGiphy

"If they're full of themselves, can't have someone who can't joke and make fun of themselves and bases life on how many likes they get on social media."

- Montevallo1

Cleanliness is next to Godliness...

"Met this girl in college, nice personality, smoking hot body, invited her over to my dorm for some Netflix n' Chill and quickly noticed she had a... how to put it delicately... a severe BO problem, I'm talking rank and when she took her shoes off it was worse than some of the guys I use to play basketball with. Ok, not a deal breaker, maybe she just had a long day and hadn't had a chance to take a shower, happens to all of us."

"So we got together a few more times and if anything it got worse, so I tried dropping some subtle hints. She finally told me she was into something called "natural hygiene" and didn't bath more than once every couple weeks or ever use deodorant, soap or shampoo. Nope... my penis was screaming yes, but my nose vetoed it, I was out."

- Dervrak

Handle It

"Handles problems badly. Meaning, will become very demanding or sullen. Need someone who is calm in stressful situations, life is full of huge problems that will need two to deal with properly."

- Interesting_Tough926

"These are all good answers but I'm surprised this one isn't higher, if you're looking for an actual life partner you need someone who can handle their crap when the going gets tough."

- ___404___

3 Strikes...

Baseball Youre Out GIF by WAXGiphy

"A broke off with a girl on our 3rd date because she was mad I wasn't jealous. So I guess jealousy? Toxicity in general?"

- FonikiPana

It's not hard to be yourself in a relationship. In a potential love match, you should be as much yourself as possible. So stay honest and own up to your flaws and your partner will do the same. And if not, you can write a thread about the men.

Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

People Share The Best Little-Known Movie Facts They Know

Reddit user Kuli24 asked: 'What's a movie fact you know that pretty much no one else knows?'

movie set
Chris Murray on Unsplash

Easter eggs, bloopers, trivia, behind the scenes anecdotes... cinephiles live collecting them and sharing their knowledge with others.

Some trivia is well known—like Eric Stoltz was replaced by Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future. Other tidbits are more obscure, like Arnold Schwarzenegger was first considered for the Michael Biehn role of Kyle Reese in The Terminator.

Some stories are conspiracy theories or urban legends—like the body in the forest on The Wizard of Oz set.

But what about just film facts? The obscure ones?

Keep reading...Show less
An illuminated mansion at night
Photo by Daniel Barnes on Unsplash

It's no secret that as a person starts to make more money, they may forget how difficult they had it when there was less money coming into their bank account.

Not only are rich people often incredibly out-of-touch with the realities of most people's lives, but what they choose to prioritize and bring into their home is often pretty bizarre, too.

Already side-eyeing, Redditor Jerswar asked:

"What's the weirdest thing you've witnessed in the home of a rich person?"

Love Can't Be Bought

"Rich grandparents had a brand new house built, had a $100,000 splash pad built for their only grandchild who has never visited them at their new house."

- wyoflyboy68

"This reminds me of when my sister built her house. She had a barrier-free ground-floor apartment built in it, so my grandmother could visit. She never did."

- P44

A Separate Hoarder's House

"I had a rich neighbor growing up who'd always invite us over for parties and always insisted on giving us gifts and leftovers. They did this with every guest."

"They were also hoarders but built a separate house to keep their crap in. It was filled with whatever they bought but never used and even never got out of the packaging it was delivered in."

"They told my mom to take a box of what she wanted, and for s**ts and giggles, she did. It was a knife collection and sharpener set."

- MUSTARDUNAVAILABLE

Unusual Art

"I was at John Waters’ house for his birthday and he has a room set up as a lifelike recreation of a meth lab (it wasn’t a real meth lab, it’s an art piece)."

"He told me that when Bill Clinton visited him the secret service agents were extremely concerned about the room."

- writeleahwrite

Weird Pet Relationships

"One client had a whole separate house on their property just for their dogs. They'd referred to it as the 'dog house,' and I was expecting like maybe a little building in the yard where they kept their toys or something, but this was a fully furnished home with king-sized beds and a huge playroom on the main floor."

"They had a full training and feeding staff to care for the dogs and everything. They lived in their own house and would come over to visit. Seemed like a weird dynamic to have with your pet..."

"One client didn't have a litterbox for the cats, their cats I guess didn't like using the boxes in the basement and they didn't want to put boxes upstairs so they put down pond liner and kitty litter across an entire room in the basement and had their housekeeper run a rake through it daily."

- daabilge

Special Needs Kitty Mystery Mansion

"As a kid back in the Mesozoic Era (I'm old), my best friend and I used to play in a converted racquetball court and lounge under the old West Coast mansion her family had lived in since its construction."

"The stairs to it were hidden behind a closet off of the abandoned servants' quarters. Halfway down the stairs was a wine cellar. A decoy as the actual wine cellar for the home was under the kitchen….. Another staircase behind a rack of dusty bottles led two stories down to our giant play area beneath this."

"At the beginning of WWII, before Pearl Harbor, my friend’s paranoid WWI vet grandfather had dug out the space over fear of Japanese (or German) invasion. Her dad made the giant room regulation designed for racquetball years later. Maybe originally squash. Not sure, but the lounge area was also glassed off above it so one could look down into the court like a gallery."

"It was really neat. Also upstairs in the living room was a wall straight out of an old mystery novel. If you pushed a spot just right, the wall opened to a hidden room. Super tiny and had a button to ring certain other rooms in the house as the home had these already to call for staff. My friend's mom said it was so if someone quickly had to hide, they could alert the household of danger."

"We used to pretend to be on Nancy Drew cases all the time... so fun."

"The family was wealthy, but despite the amazing home, they lived a completely pretentious free life. Normal cars, camping vacations, frugal living as sport."

"But they were philanthropists too, especially supporting organizations like the humane society. One thing about this family’s home was all the cats. I loved kitties but had a mother who preferred her animals well-seasoned. The family had the space so they always had, and were looking to adopt out but often didn’t, at least 20 rescue cats, many with special needs."

"I’m old, I didn’t know how to write that. Special needs kitty mystery mansion really is actually an appropriate description..."

- waltersmama

"Special needs kitty mystery mansion with hidden panic rooms and decoy wine cellars is like, the best possible fever dream."

- ConneisseurOfDanger

A Unique Viewing Experience

"In Naples, FL., I was at a house with a sensory deprivation room. Flat black walls with acoustic dampening baffles, in the middle was a coffin-like bathtub. It had speakers and a flat-screen display in the lid."

"I heard that the room cost over $100K to build."

- frank_sarno

A Christmas Village

"They had part of the house permanently decorated for Christmas and it included a fully decorated Christmas tree that was suspended upside down from the ceiling. Which was pretty awesome."

- lithecello

New Meaning to "Don't Take Your Work Home"

"My wife and I used to babysit for this wealthy couple when they went on ski trips etc."

"Except for the children's schoolbooks, there wasn't a book, magazine, or newspaper in the house."

"The man was a publisher."

- Texbadger349

The End of Laundry

"I knew someone who didn't like to do laundry so she just bought new clothes for each of her 4 kids every week. They were always high-quality or designer clothes. At the time, all her kids were 10 to 16 years old."

"What would happen if they liked an item a lot and couldn't find it again? Why not just teach the kids to do their own laundry? Why not hire a housekeeper who can do it?"

"There are so many options, other than spending thousands every month just to avoid laundry. Plus, they rarely donated it. Just bagged it up and threw it out. I never could wrap my head around it."

- coffee-jnky

Can We Be the Trivia Guy?

"I know someone who's worked for a very rich person, probably worth billions. He had more than 100 staff on site, including chefs for the staff...all while divorced and living alone. He had a 'trivia' staff member... someone hired to tell him interesting facts and stories daily. That was his only job."

"Someone else was hired to maintain his shoes. Polish, shine, the works."

"If I didn't hear it firsthand, I wouldn't have believed it."

- mambo-nr4

A Mud Room, Indeed!

​"I used to work as an exterminator, mostly pest control. This had me walking through houses from the poor to the rich."

"One day, I pulled up to a four-story mansion with more rooms than I could count."

"I spoke with the lady at the door and got started. As I sprayed, I noticed there wasn’t much furniture in the house. As I went, I made a game of counting the furniture I could find. Over 50 rooms and the whole building had 13 pieces of furniture."

"Pretty odd, but then I went into the very last room, a mud room right by the door I came into."

"I stopped as I walked in, completely shocked. A huge, full-sized (alive) adult pig stretched from one end of the room to the other, resting on the tile floor. I’m talking five or six feet stretched out across the room. Flies buzzed around its head as it stared at me."

"Suddenly, the lady (who I hadn’t seen since she let me in) said, 'Oh, don’t go in there. She doesn’t like men,' and then she walked me out, paid me, and went back inside."

- Moist-Exchange2890

His Very Own Hot Wheels Garage

"Buddy of mine has a car elevator."

"Instead of just building a bigger garage, he stores his cars stacked onto each other, like some kind of Hot Wheels accessory. It's very surreal."

- SmackEh

Make Yourself at Home

​"My friend's dad growing up was one of the top lawyers in our state. Their house was so d**n big, I got confused (lost as h**l) on all the staircases they had everywhere. They would split in a few places and lead to banisters that had different connections to different parts of the house."

"They had a room just for dishes. Her mom had a huge room for sewing and another for different crafts. They both had an office. Many guest rooms. A small kitchen in one part with a sink, coffee pot, and fridge. Their main bathroom for guests had heated floors and rainfall showers and everything. I LOVED HER SHOWER."

"Her room had a balcony and a table outside."

"They had a pool and hot tub. Horses and a barn and lots of cute barn cats."

"I was very poor and had a messed up situation in my childhood. I stayed there a lot and they would even take me for weeks in the summer because my mother was not there. They are really great people."

" They didn't give handouts or anything, I would literally scoop up horse shit and clean stalls and help with everything for those horses when I stayed. I wanted to help."

"They had a maid, but we still cleaned up after ourselves. Their kitchen was gigantic, and I always loved the fancy pasta water arm over the stove. I had so much fun cooking with her mom and us having the big dinners (Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas) with them."

"They were so magnificent and beyond anything I would have ever experienced without them. I got my first pair of cowboy boots from them for Christmas. Her dad bought me a plane ticket one time out of the blue because I wanted to visit my grandmother. Never forget them."

- xNinjaNoPants

So Much Wasted Food

"A very rich person I know does not eat leftover food. They will cook a feast and after, everything goes straight in the garbage no matter how much is left over."

- duckduckroosebolton

"My husband won’t eat leftovers because he thinks it will give him diarrhea. His family is preoccupied with food poisoning but doesn’t know any of the actual food safety rules."

"Oh well, more for me."

- jendet010

"My brother-in-law’s family does this but they are middle class. It’s such a waste!"

- outlawjoseymeow

An Art Enthusiast

"Not weird but a Van Gogh, just chillin' in the hallway. I took a selfie with the flash on, whoops."

- Raccoon_Expert_69

"When I did executive level IT support years back, I found a Monet dangling haphazardly on an office chair in the CEO's extra office (which was unused for storage, and had an extra desktop computer I would sometimes use for quick tasks when on that floor)."

"Another time, I was admiring a Joan Miro coffee table book in his main office, and when his assistant noticed, he showed me into a side room I didn’t realize was there, which had a mini gallery of original Miro drawings."

- spymusicspy

It's amazing what people will spend money on when they have the money to spare. It would be so interesting to see how much more a person would explore a hobby if they had the money to spend.

There's nothing like leaving a movie theater having just seen an excellent movie.

Particularly one that took you by surprise.

Perhaps it was deeper and more meaningful than it purported itself to be, or on the flip side, had much more warmth and humor that you would have expected.

Or, the film took an unexpected twist that you never saw coming.

Resulting in your needing to bite your tongue until the rest of your friends and family see the film, and not spoil the surprise for them.

Redditor HornyCorny was curious to hear which plot twists left viewers utterly speechless, leading them to ask:

"What’s a movie twist that caught you completely off guard?"

He Didn't See It Coming Either!

"Brad Pitt in 'Burn After Reading'."

"So surprising and downright freaking hilarious."- thefirehairman

If The Shoe Fits...

"'The Shawshank Redemption'."

"Come on."

"It's not always a man notices another man's shoes."- FUBARspecimenT-89

Lucky For Some, Not For All...

"'Lucky Number Slevin'."

"Huge twist and very satisfying."- kvlr954

angry josh hartnett GIFGiphy

Rosie O'Donnell Would Agree...

"Fight Club."- BuchseeI

"once watched it with a friend who had never even heard of it, and she called the twist like, a half hour in."

"She said it as a joke and didn't realize she was right until the actual reveal, but still I was shook."- yugosaki

I See You Keyser Söze

"The ending of 'The Usual Suspects'."- Schwarzes__Loch

Definitive Shyamalan

''The Sixth Sense'."

'I love movies with plot twists, but I never imagined this one. It caught me completely off guard."- lucasduka

Haley Joel Osment Movie GIFGiphy

The Title Is Also Misleading...

"The second half of 'Parasite'."- iwontrememberthat4

Appropriately, They Really Toyed With Your Cognition

"'The Game'."- DudeHeadAwesome

"Good one!'

"I spent the entire movie going 'is it a game? Is it real?'"- fastpixels

There Were Definitely Ghosts...

"'The Others'."

"Unsuspected end."- NeckComprehensive743

scared horror film GIF by FilmStruckGiphy

One Unforgettable Opening Scene

"'Scream'."

"The Drew Barrymore role."- LivingTheLife53

The Real Reason Everyone Is Terrified Of Bees...

"When I was a kid, I wanted to feel good and happy."

"So at the video store, I decided to rent a movie with two happy laughing kids on the DVD cover, thinking it would be a feel-good playful story."

"That movie was 'My Girl'."

"Eff that movie."

"Seriously."

'The DVD cover lies."

"IT LIES."- buckyhermit

You THOUGHT you knew who the villains were...

"'From Dusk to Dawn' — midway point."

"Didn’t know at all what I was walking into when saw it in the theatre decades ago — just, you know, Salma Hayek. Good enough."

"Quentin Tarantino slurping tequila from her foot after it ran down the entire length of her leg — that was already a 'Holy WTF' moment."

"But then, well.. . you know."

"And if you don’t know — quick, go watch it. "

"No trailer, no synopsis, no summary."

"Find it and load it 'blind' and fasten your seatbelt."

"You’re in for a wild ride."- canada11235813

George Clooney Tarantino GIF by MIRAMAXGiphy

It's Title Is More Than Accurate!

"'Crazy Stupid Love'."

"The scene when the whole movie goes apesh*t in the yard is one of my all time favorite movie scenes."- Fimbulvintern

Trifecta Of Twists

"'The Others'."

"The end of 'The Mist'."

"'The Prestige' (though, I ALMOST had it figured out, but not quite)."- Krinks1

There's nothing better than when a movie surprises you.

Even if it does make talking about said movie with people who haven't seen it a bit more challenging.

Case in point, people who saw The Sixth Sense and The Usual Suspects after their endings were spoiled for them, don't seem to like those movies as much as those who went in blind.