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Guys Divulge The Most Difficult Things To Explain To Women

Guys Divulge The Most Difficult Things To Explain To Women
Photo by Mihai Surdu on Unsplash

Conversation can be one life's scariest actions. Whoever said it was an art form was 100% correct.

Words are beautiful and language is the bedrock of our lives but boy of boy can it create some problems.

One wrong word, or false noun and it can send a conversation reeling.

Having hard chats throughout life though are just part of the deal of living.

It can be especially difficult in relationships with opposite sex. Women are better at communication, that's just fact.

Men have a more arduous time broaching touchy subjects. Some touchier than others.

Case in point...

Redditor aeronachtwanted all of the gents out there to fess about the times they have to make, what could be uncomfortable, chit chat with the ladies, they asked:

"Men of Reddit, what’s the most difficult thing to explain to women?"

I've never had much trouble talking to women. Well, except for the one time I had to come out to my girlfriend and explain me and her friend, you know what, never mind. Let's hear from you.

Don't Look

Peek A Boo Reaction GIF by Robert E BlackmonGiphy

"Idk if it's the most difficult, but it sure did take awhile to explain to my ex that we (guys) don’t look at each other’s penis in the urinals." ~ itsOski13

Be Nice

"In a moment of anger, I’m smart enough to understand that 'shooting off at the mouth and saying something I don’t really mean' is FAR worse than 'saying nothing, realizing ‘it’s not the end of the world,’ and excusing myself to recollect my thoughts.' Just because I walked away from a conversation that was quickly going the wrong way doesn’t mean I’m metaphorically walking away from the other person or the relationship. I occasionally just need a couple minutes/hours." ~ CornerPubRon

Just Move

"Sometimes we are too shy to make the first move or take it further because we don't know if you're ok with that." ~ ungabungamans

"My female friends had a hard time understanding why I was single. I told them I was tired of chasing people, saying cute stuff, etc. I want them to do the same for me, I also want to feel special and worthy."

"They told me that it’s the guy’s obligation to go after the girl and that they wouldn’t make the first move. Had a whole argument with them that they should also try to make the first move or give friendly compliments to their guy friends. We also get tired of being friendly lol." ~ ImportantGreen

Nada

"That I'm happy just hanging out doing nothing." ~ Aggravating_Bat1786

"I feel this. even my (male) friends don't get this sometimes. I genuinely just really like doing nothing, guys. doesn't mean I don't want to hang out- you're more than welcome to come by- but I'm busy doing nothing right now." ~ jereflea1024

Hold Me

Teddy Bear Cat GIFGiphy

"Why I want cuddles everyday." ~ Nightfury0818

"And to be the little spoon. Even if I'm a giant and you'd be my backpack/jetpack, sometimes it's really nice to be the little spoon." ~ subscribe_for_facts

No one should have to explain cuddling. Just be grateful you have someone to cuddle with. For free.

It just happens!

Who Knows Idk GIFGiphy

"I can’t control if I get erect or not. If I can’t get hard then being angry with me is not suddenly going to make things better." ~ Hiredgun77

Don't you want me?

"I don't always want to be the one that initiates sex. It makes me feel like a creep." ~ leemurray98

"I've told this to my girlfriend several times, because it's a pretty big problem for me as well. She tells me sex doesn't just cross her mind randomly if I don't initiate. I remember her initiating 3 or 4 times in the 7 years we've been together. I still feel like a freaking creep every time I start. And when she doesn't reject me, it feels like she's doing me a favor. Very healthy, I know." ~ nudi85

These Actors Were Perfectly Cast In Their Roles | George Takei’s Oh Myyy

Sometimes an actor comes along that is able to reach the audience on a deeper level. The actor that immediately comes to mind is Robin Williams. Although it ...

Just before the wedding...

"My misses met my oldest friend at a wedding early last year. Haven't seen him since, or for about ten years before, despite living about three miles away from each other. Just before the wedding, she asked me how come we never met up, I said 'he's alive, isn't he?' Couple of days later at the actual wedding, she asked him the same things, and he also said 'he's alive, isn't he?' She never understood that. Never managed to explain that to her." ~ Fhjull-Forked-Tongue

Contact Sports

"That many men only have meaningful physical contact with their SO. Single men often exist in touch isolation. For a variety of reasons and social pressures many men experience a lack of physical contact. Most men I know won't even feel comfortable hugging their best friend. For a long time the only physical contact I had with other people was either sexual or a part of a competitive sport."

"Getting closer to my middle age I've learned to hug my friends and have platonic physical contact. It's really helped my mental health. I used to feel alone all the time even when I was with friends. Hug your male friends and help them normalize platonic physical affection." ~ zzSc0tchzz

Mirror, Mirror

Benicio Del Toro Man GIFGiphy

"We can feel unattractive too. Just because I don't want to sleep with you, doesn't mean I don't love you or find you attractive."

"Just like you, guys can feel insecure about our bodies and not feel confidence, and having you question if it's because we don't love you anymore makes it feel like we can't be honest about those types of things." ~ FFSock

Nothing more.

"Sometimes we just want a hug. Nothing more. Just a non-judgemental shoulder to cry on." ~ Rajun_Cajun1

"nothing"

"When you ask me what Im thinking about, and I occasionally say "nothing" I'm literally staring off into the middle distance and spacing out. Im not failing to share with you. It's like a mini reset button that takes 30 to 90 seconds to reboot the mainframe and stop a shutdown." ~ d3k3d

The Struggle is real...

"We struggle with insecurities, feelings of inadequacy and feeling like we are worthless too and a big thing we struggle with is many of us feel like we are only loved on the condition we provide something, i.e financial resources, ability to protect, that sort of thing and society does a really bad job of even attempting to convince us that isn't true. And in fact the general narrative around the subject actually enforces such feelings rather than attempting to dispel them."

"Growing up we are told we need to earn lots of money in order to provide for a wife and kids and the media shows all the rich guys getting the girls and dating in later years the topic always comes up about how much we make and what our future prospects are like and it can be really discouraging. I've personally been turned down because she unashamedly said i wasn't wealthy enough to keep her happy." ~ dman2316

Not Tonight

No Thank You Reaction GIFGiphy

"I don't feel like having sex, I'm tired. No it has nothing to do with you, if I desire you, if I think you're attractive. I am honestly tired and just want to sleep tonight." ~ Noah_Deez_Nutz

let's talk...

"That dudes can have a 2 hour conversation with each other (phone, down at the pub, playing online games) and not talk about any personal s**t. My SO finds it super bizarre that I can talk to my brother for an hour and not know how his family is going, how his work is, what holiday plans are. Sometimes some bros just want to talk About movies or make fart jokes." ~ W2ttsy

Today

"When you ask me how my day was or what I did today, nothing in my day usually stands out as special, so I just don't remember. I usually don't remember what I do, I just live." ~ Ok--Masterpiece

"My husband and I have this backwards. He always wants to talk about his ordinary workday whereas I’d rather not be asked about work because what is there to say? I worked. If anything was exciting about it I would’ve said so." ~ NettyTheMadScientist

Men Need

"Men need foreplay too. A buddy of mine once had a gf who would leave the room to undress before sex to freshen up etc. When she returned if he wasn't completely erect and ready to go she'd cry and accuse him of not being attracted to her. Like, the idea of having sex with her alone should keep him 100% erect for the 10 minutes he was waiting for her." ~ Chiggadup

Good Dad

"That, despite what movies/TV/literature hammer into your brains, fathers can be emotionally available, engaged, great parents. I'm the sole parent of a son and two daughters and I've had to listen to 'what does mom think of her getting this haircut?' and 'tell mom to schedule an appointment' for years. Mom's in a halfway house you twit, and I'm plenty capable of making decisions for my own children." ~ TecumsehSherman

Let me be...

South Asian Man GIF by IdentityGiphy

"Some of us. just can't properly express our emotions. Even when we're allowed to be vulnerable. We've been psychological conditioned not to for most of our lives. Even when we try to, there's just. something that won't let it fully come out." ~ JoakimSpinglefarb

We Don't Care

"That when we say we don't care about something, we don't care about it. We're not being stoic, we're not playing games, we're not lying, we literally do not give a flying fig, and the reason why we seem to be a bit tense is that you've asked about it at least 10 times in the last hour." ~ mammbo

Ok gents, time to buck up and share some feelings. You're not alone in your worry. But you can handle it. I have faith in.

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People Confess Which Things They've Always Done They Didn't Realize Were Gross

Reddit user one-droplet asked: 'What have you always done, but later found out was gross?'

There's this amazing quote by Maya Angelou that we can all put into practice: "Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better."

This can be applied to anything in life, from learning more about a subject that we're passionate about, to practicing better time management skills, to being a better friend.

But there are some things that we may not even realize we need to do better... until we suddenly know better.

Cringing in anticipation, Redditor one-droplet asked:

"What have you always done, but later found out was gross?"

The Best Ice

"When I was like five or six years old I would love going to the grocery store with my mom because the vegetable and fruit and meat tables always had the best ice to chew on..."

- campio_s_a

"I work in a restaurant, and I try to grab a cup to get the ice before they use it for raw oysters and shrimp cocktails. It really is the best ice."

- AustinRiversDaGod

Toilet Paper Use

"As an Asian, I was always taught growing up to throw used toilet paper in the trash bin. It wasn't until I went on a school trip to Italy and the chaperone mentioned to everyone, 'The plumbing system here isn't as good as the USA so you guys are just gonna have to throw it in the trash bin,' and everyone went, 'Ew.'"

"That's when I learned that it was gross to throw toilet paper in the trash bin since the issue was you're basically having shit bits sitting around in a bin."

- stigma_numgus

Toothbrush Bristles

"All my life, I wiped my toothbrush on the hand towel to dry it up until my sister asked what the f**k I was doing."

- Sark_Doul

"My sister used to scrub the bristles on the faucet where the water came out when she was done brushing her teeth. I guess to dry it off. I still cringe thinking about it."

- Suspicious-Craft4980

That's Not Clay

"As a child, I would dig up bits of clay from the local sandbox. It wasn’t as good as Play-Doh, so I would cast it aside and continue digging."

"Maybe I didn’t have a very good sense of smell at that age, because I was well into adulthood before I realized it was probably cat s**t."

- Blue_Moon_Rabbit

Dirty Showers

"I showered in a dirty tub. Once I discovered how gross it really was, my hoarder mother didn’t like it when I cleaned the bathroom, so I just lived with it til I was able to get a place."

- TrustIsOverrated

"My hoarder mom was like this."

- Best_Eggplant_9259

"When I tried to wash the nicotine off the walls in my bedroom, my hoarder parents were not happy."

- obviouslyanni

Fresh Towels

"I waited until a towel smelled weird to swap it out."

- DrippyFlames

"Look, the towel forgets everything before the next shower."

- gljivicad

Self-Service Assorted Candies

"I used to really like those self-service lollies/candy buckets with the scoops. They were in most big box stores in Australia, like Kmart, Target, Big W. So much fun mixing and matching."

"But then one day I started working at Target. Every single day I caught old people and kids with their hands directly inside grabbing them out and munching down all slobbery-like. That turned me off forever."

"Though not too long after they started disappearing from businesses so obviously someone got the unsanitary message."

- blahblahrasputan

Not Flushable

"I flushed my tampons my whole life until I was about 30. No one had taught me they weren’t flushable. I stupidly thought they were like toilet paper."

"One expensive and embarrassing plumbing problem later, I never did it again."

- Ew_fine

Dental Habits

"Not brushing my teeth when I wake up. I would only brush my teeth after breakfast, and I would rarely eat breakfast."

"So most days I would only brush my teeth at night. I figured, 'Well, I brushed last night and haven’t eaten anything since, so why should I brush again?'"

" Then I learned about all the bacteria that feed on the tiny bits of food left in your teeth and they literally expel gas and feces in your mouth as they consume it. And this is what causes awful morning breath."

"So I have this mental image of bacteria poop and farts coating my mouth and have brushed every morning since regardless of eating breakfast or not."

- scatteredwardrobe

"Brush at night to keep your teeth, and brush in the morning to keep your friends."

- coykoi314

Not Just Yellow Snow

"Eating snow. Just take the same handful of snow you might see a kid stuff in their mouth and let it melt in a glass. Bet you wouldn’t willingly drink it!"

- Affectionate_Cloud86

Don't Visit Everyone's House

"I sit on my couch butt naked when I’m alone watching TV at night. I mean I’m relatively clean but I feel sorry for anyone else that sits there."

- Rich-Abbreviations25

Letting the Hair Fall Where It May

"I'm suffering from hair loss at the moment (51 Female) and I'm often absent-mindedly raking a hand through my long hair, glancing at what comes out and then dropping the strands on the floor."

"Just read on another sub that that's pretty disgusting to other people. In my defense, I work exclusively from home in my own small office and would never do it in public, but even so, maybe my husband thinks I'm gross."

- RadioDorothy

Shoes Indoors

"Wearing shoes inside. My family was not a shoes off family and they always wore outside shoes inside."

"I remember a few friends' homes were strict shoes-off homes, but I thought that was the minority."

"I was about 27 years old before I realized it was disgusting and people were definitely judging my etiquette."

- MyDogAteYourPancakes

Double-Dipping

"Double-dipping snacks. Pretty logical but only found out recently that’s very bad etiquette."

- AggravatingDriver559

"Double-dipping is only acceptable if you’re not sharing the dip with anyone."

- froderenfelemus

Fair Lessons

"Some things I've learned:"

"Wash my bedsheets every week, including bed, pillows, and covers."

"Only use the same bath towel twice before washing it."

"Use a new toothbrush head every month."

"Always wash my hands coming back from a store or public transit."

"And NEVER EVER go into a resort pool with a swim-in bar."

- freddg_mtl

This conversation was so cringe-worthy and left us wanting a shower in the worst way.

At least for most of these Redditors, now that they knew these are gross habits, they've chosen to do something better.

Bags of movie theater popcorn
Corina Rainer/Unsplash

Sources provided by health experts informed us to eat fruits and vegetables in order to nourish our bodies with energy, and to drink milk to ensure we grew up with strong bones and muscles.

However, nowadays, consumers are confused.

There seems to be conflicting information every day regarding the benefits, or harm, of eating the foods we were always told were detrimental to our health.

Curious to hear from strangers online about our misconceptions regarding the foods we eat, Redditor Meerkate asked:

"What are some foods that aren't as unhealthy as people make them out to be?"

People discuss everyone's favorite movie snack.

Pass The Popcorn

"Popcorn. For how good it tastes, it has almost nothing bad in it."

"You add the salt and butter of course, and those arent great, but you're not getting a super high amount of those."

– mithridateseupator

"Adding in decent quality butter (not margarine) and a few shakes of regular salt is not unhealthy at all. The problem is with the sh*t that movie theatres put in popcorn."

– puffy_capacitor

Careful With The Seasoning

"My body started rejecting movie theater popcorn butter when I was about 25. That stuff will make you sh*t your pants and miss the end of the movie. Just salt for me thanks. Real melted butter at home or at Alamo Drafthouse."

– jesusbatman

Healthy Suggestion

"I love popcorn."

"You probably buy the kernels too but for those who don't, it's significantly cheaper and healthier to buy just a big container of popcorn kernels."

"Pop them on the stove top with a small amount of oil and sprinkle some finely ground salt (that's what movie theaters use for that magic flavor) and you're golden."

"It's super easy. I don't even add butter."

"You can also pop kernels in the microwave in a paper bag or in a bowl without buying the pre-bagged stuff. You'll never go back to those once you've popped your own kernels."

"An air popper works too of course, though that will definitely require butter."

– VralShi

Redditors talk about the health benefits of eating certain kinds of fat.

Not So Fat

"Fat in general (not the trans ones tho)"

– LenkaSky

"The low fat craze of the late ‘90s/early ‘00s has A LOT to answer for. My mom is still ridiculous about it. Yeah, moderation is good, but you can add some butter to your food so it’s edible and still live a long life."

– burgher89

Fat Is Your Friend

"Fat is a great source of sustained energy that doesn’t boost your blood glucose like other options."

– honorificabilidude

"You really, really need fat in your diet for proper hormone regulation and other important body processes!"

– aledaml

Go easy on the carbs.

Hey Spud

"Potatoes got several countries through famine! Probably alot of people associate them with fatty fries or crisps."

– Meerkate

Get Starchy

"Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew"

– DokiDoodleLoki

"Exactly this. High satiation and low cost. You can wash out a lot of the starch if you're worried about it."

– The_Quicktrigger

Let's discuss fruity.

Nature's Candy

"I’m so tired of hearing people talk about 'all the natural sugar in fruit.'”

"I guarantee you this banana is healthier than potato chips and cookies."

– Sharyn913

"My mom has done basically ever fad diet ever, but one thing I do like about the 'new' Weight Watchers is that fruits, vegetables, and lean meats like chicken breast are zero points. I think the logic behind it is that there is no f'king way you're going to eat enough carrot sticks and apples to make yourself gain weight, so they're trying to encourage people to default to that stuff when they're hungry even if they're out of points rather than just starving until they give up and eat a bunch of unhealthy foods. Weight Watchers doesn't really work long term, but that detail is nice."

– standbyyourmantis

Saving Grace

"I think its the fiber in fruit that makes it not as bad. Also, it has nutrition to make up for it unlike the cookie that's just all refined flour and sugar."

– Tangerine_memez

Calorie Count

"There are scientific studies suggesting that not all the calories in nuts are bioavailable, so you might only get 75% of the calories! There are also studies showing they contribute to weight loss even despite being high in calories."

– kazzah31

When I was told butter is actually a better alternative to margarine–which is known to contain trans fat–I started cooking more with butter.

I believe we can eat anything in moderation, so as much as I love smearing pads of butter on my English muffin, I take it easy.

When it comes to baking with it and putting it on toast, nothing beats the flavor of my favorite dairy fat.

It goes without saying, that when we pay a visit to a hospital, either as a guest or as a patient, we only see a very small portion of all the working parts of a hospital.

While countless doctors, nurses and orderlies will be seen roaming the halls, their hands more than full, there are also lab technicians and administrators who are every bit as busy, just not as visible.

Knowing this does rather make one wonder what goes on in a hospital that we don't see, or don't realize.

Or, for that matter, what we patients are actually entitled to, that they may not realize.

A question possibly best left unanswered.

Even so, Redditor SingLikeTinaTurner was eager to find out, leading them to ask:

"Hospital workers of Reddit, what happens there that's hidden but that we should know about?"

If You Know, You Know...

"Not really hidden and kinda minor but I’ll say it anyways."

"I deliver food to patients and it’s not hard to tell when someone is on their way out."

"Could be simply not being hungry, or could be the inability to eat."

"Had one patient who hadn’t eaten anything off their tray for 3 days straight."

"The last time I delivered to them, they smiled and gave me a wink."

"Next day, they were gone."

"It’s rough seeing these things happen in real-time."

"I’m a grown @ss man who doesn’t cry often, but it always leaves me feeling extra empty picking up the untouched trays and replacing them with another tray that I know will stay untouched as well."- jgss2018

Hidden In Plain Sight

"Sometimes when people die we just put an oxygen mask on them and wheel them through the corridors."

"Less distressing for other patients and visitors to think they are asleep rather than see a body with a sheet over it."- dont-believe-me-·

Know Your Rights

"You, as a patient, have every right to refuse any test or treatment or even leave."

"At any time."

"For any reason."

"Unless a harm to self or others- that's different, at least in the US."

"Added bonus you should know: leaving against medical advice DOES NOT mean insurance will not pay for the care you've received."

"Your insurance will still be billed the same as anyone else who stayed the whole time till discharge."

"But if you leave with an IV in your arm we will call the police to find you and bring you back to remove it, because of drug abuse."- Suitable_Sorbet_8718

Peeking Not Recommended

"The hospital I work at has these big square covers."

"When I first started, I would see transport staff pushing these things around the halls."

"I thought they were food trays, or large boxes of hospital equipment."

"Turns out it’s a structured bed cover, so when they are transporting a deceased patient to the morgue, it doesn’t look like a person under a sheet."- rajortoa9

The Flashing Lights Only Get You So Far

"An ambulance ride is not a one way ticket to the front of the line."

"You still get triaged and could be rolled right to the waiting room if you’re non-emergent."- dozerdude1995

emergency ambulance GIFGiphy

Whatever Gets Them In The Zone...

"Surgeon here."

"We listen to music in the OR."

"Most people seem surprised when they hear that."- johnnyscans

Hide And Seek...

"I got a fast bleep (ie. drop everything you’re doing and attend this emergency please) one night to a side room on the ward to find no patient in the bed."

"Was just about to leave the room and go back out to the nurses station, where there had been a bit of a hubbub when I’d dashed past the first time, when something caught my eye."

"Looked up to see a face with wide, slightly wild 'psych eyes' peering down at me from a gap in the ceiling tiles."

"She was a lady waiting for a bed in the psych hospital who’d clearly thought the ceiling was the best place to hide from the people trying to poison her."

"Honestly can’t think of another occasion that I’ve been quite so terrified."

"Worst thing was that I had to walk (well, dash) back out underneath her to get help from the nurses and security to get her down."- Leas-Pe·

Speaking In Code...

"If you register in the ER and tell the triage nurse that your problem is 'personal' we know you’re here because of something genital or anal related."

"A lot of we healthcare workers have seen a lot."

"If you’re not truthful at triage, your care might be less prompt when it’s a true medical emergency."

"It is possible to die of embarrassment."- DocWednesday

Hide Reaction GIF by florGiphy

Things You Can Tell Just By Looking At Them

"If you come into the ER drunk there is guaranteed a pool of bets on your blood alcohol level, possibly with odds if there's a pharmacist available to do the math for us."- K-Tanz

Ensuring They're Surrounded By Love

"In the ICU you spend a lot of time keeping corpses alive until their family comes around or their body gives out."

“'Oh Jesus ain’t ready for her yet!'”

"Yes, Jesus is ready for her; we’re just actively delaying it."- gamerdudeNYC

Maybe Not Just At Hosptials... Just A Thought...

"Not hidden, per se, but for the love of all that is holy, if you insist on bringing your kid into the hospital, do NOT let them crawl or play on the floor."

"The amount of literal blood, urine, poop, and vomit that has been on it and hastily (not thoroughly) cleaned up is, well, a lot."

"The hospital, especially the floors, is NOT a clean environment."

"Added to that, think of all the rooms nurses, doctors, housekeeping staff, etc. have walked into."

"Rooms that have COVID or Norovirus or group A Strep."

"We walked into those rooms and those same shoes walked into other rooms."

"Tl;dr hospital floors are disgusting as f*ck."- duckface08

Baby Crawls Face First Across The Floor GIF by ViralHogGiphy

Not An Exact Science...

"Hospital lab worker here."

"Not particularly scandalous, but most people don't realiZe their lab tests are just very accurate guesses, and have an error range."

"When we say your 'X' is 10g/L, we might actually mean it's 10g/L ± 10-20%."

"I see too many people get extremely worked up about small fluctuations in blood test values that aren't actually in excess of the reference change value, and so technically aren't genuinely different from a previous value."- Hayred

A Decision No One Wants To Make...

"You are doing your 90 year old grandmother a great disservice by making her a full code, she will not survive CPR and her death will be significantly more traumatic because of it."- singlenutwonder

WASH YOUR FREAKIN' HANDS!!!

"I help patients to the bathroom nonstop all day."

"The amount of patients that just leave the bathroom without washing their hands is disgusting."

"If I didn’t hear the sink or soap dispenser your a** is getting led right to an alcohol hand station."- Madamiamadam

Wash Hands Water GIF by Jared D. WeissGiphy

More goes on in a hospital than we're ever likely to know.

If you check out from a hospital healthier than you were when you checked in, that's probably all you need to know.

Even if it's understandable to ask what song the doctor was listening to when you were open on the operating table.


red throw pillow on white couch
Photo by reisetopia on Unsplash

My family went on a lot trips when I was young, and we always stayed in hotel rooms. Around the time my brother and I were old enough to stay in a room by ourselves (our parents would stay in another one, usually across the hall), he also became a bit of a germaphobe.

At the time, I actually believed hotels changed the sheets on the beds daily, so when my brother fretted about the cleanliness of the hotels, I reassured him they were fine. He believed me at first, since I was his big sister, but by the time he was 12, he got suspicious.

During one of our trips, he decided to test this by making a mark on his pillow cover with a pen and turning the pillow cover inside out before we left for sightseeing the next morning. When we returned, he turned the pillow cover back, and his mark was still there, proving that the sheets hadn't been changed. He only had to do this one more time, during our next trip, for me to realize this wasn't a one-off.

Ever since, and even now in adulthood, my brother and I always intentionally spill something on our sheets during our first night in order to get clean sheets, at least for the duration of our stay. This, in fact, is the first thing we do.

I'm not the only person who does something a bit quirky like this when they first enter a hotel rooms. Plenty or Redditors have stories about this and are ready to share.

It all started when Redditor BlundeRuss asked:

"What’s the first thing you do when you get into a hotel room?"

​Preparing For Sights

"Go to the balcony to see if it's going to be public nudity or private nudity during my morning coffee."

– hoffarmy

"I love that this doesn’t change your plans, just prepares your mind. Excellence."

– sewahyelah

Show Me The Truth

"Put my bags up on something and check the mattress. I also bought a UV flashlight but after using it at home I’ve decided that bringing it to a hotel would be unnecessary torture. Nothing is clean when you shine the thing on it. And I mean nothing."

– Fatguy73

Temperature Check

"One of my close friends travels a ton for business. She also loves to sleep in a f**king ice box."

"She has found some resource for how to basically jailbreak hotel thermostats. Each hotel thermostat has a specific key sequence that unlocks the lower temps that the hotel normally doesn’t allow guests to set because, you know, money."

– Sp4ceh0rse

"I do this in every hotel."

– jubilee__

Sweet Relief

"Set bags down."

"Look at room for cleanliness."

"Take a dump."

– PuzzledCitron8728

"I showed up early to a hotel after 12 hours straight of driving. Took forever for them to get me in the room (really it was probably only 30 minutes and they were super accommodating)."

"Anyways, I had been feeling the tyrannical gouging of a sh*t demon trying to claw it's way out for about half an hour beforehand. I ran down the hall, opened the door, threw my bag at something, and was kinda hovering over the toilet just in time. Hadn't put cheek to rim yet and my darling baby began his exit."

"It wasn't until after I looked up that I realized neither door was the self-closing kind and you could see all the way in from the hallway."

– coreylahe

"You’ve unlocked a childhood memory. I stayed in a lot of hotels while growing up and I saw someone in your position once, trail of belongings leading to the toilet. So I went and shut the door for him."

– scarfknitter

Disney Magic

"Find the bible and flip through it. When my sister and I were kids, we went to Disney, and I think she asked why is there always a bible in the drawer, waved it by the spine and 20 bucks fell out. So I always check now."

– TyWiggly

"I found $100 that way. 5 crisp 20's,. I was pretty broke at the time too."

– weisblattsnut

Always Check

"First, I look at the area between the mattress and headboard for any signs of bed bugs, then under the sheets. I’ve never encountered them, but I’ve heard so many horror stories that I’m paranoid about them."

– triceraquake

"As someone who worked in hotels, I always double check the door locks and then inspect for bed bugs."

– Chatterbxer

Yikes!

"Look for cameras. I'm a paranoid f**k."

– Gubble_Buppie

"If anyone wants to see an overweight guy in his mid-40s eat pringles in his underwear while reading Stephen King novels, then they have my flabby white blessing."

– oppernaR

"They sell surprisingly easy to use scanners on Amazon. I found a camera in an air bb bedroom alarm clock, threw a towel over it and got the whole stay for free. Some will detect signals but the best way is there’s a looking glass that’s red and it emits a light and you turn off all the lights and look around the room. Any active camera will shine like a cats eyes when you skim over it."

– Vacation_Kinkycouple

The Things We Find

"I check in odd places to see if anyone stashed drugs or money. You would be surprised at all the sh*t I’ve found over the years!"

– Deathbot-420

"We found an axe under the bed once."

– Punkstarbabe

Ick.

"Yank the comforter off the bed and throw it in the corner. they rarely wash those things."

– whatever32657

"I discovered this recently while calling home to say good night to everyone. Dried food stuck to the comforter. Threw that bad boy off the bed."

– DuchessofSquee

"I cleaned an air BnB for a little while and I was so disturbed when they told me they didn't wash the comforter because hotels don't.... Like I guess I get it because they're heavy and they're trying to save water on the washes but yuck dude... Cleaning that air Bnb made me NEVER want to book one because of the sh*t the owners wouldn't LET me clean... I don't think I'd ever survive as a maid for a hotel, I could never travel again lol."

– ModestMeeshka

It's A Process

"Make a condom for the TV remote control. Take the ice bag from the ice bucket and put the remote in it. Now I never have to touch the remote."

– dontknowafunnyname2

"I'm sure disinfectant wipes could do the job."

– Pheobe0228

Check For Monsters...People Monsters

"Make sure no one is hiding under the bed or in the bathroom 😂😅"

– HeadInTheClouds916

"I travel a lot for work…and I’m shocked no one else mentioned this. First I check the closet, under the bed, the bathroom for a hiding serial killer…then check the mattress for bedbugs…"

– pdxmikaela

Today I Learned

"Check for cleanliness and then take pictures Traffickcam."

"Traffickcam is an app where you take specific pictures of your room and then upload them to their database. They use these pictures to check on the location of human trafficking victims."

– slappymasterson

"Take a picture of the room and post it on the Trafickcam app so if the room or similar has been used by human traffickers maybe it will help find someone."

– CatsInTrenchCoat

And thanks to those last two stories, I'm a little scared to stay in another hotel.