
The Elephant In the Room
[rebelmouse-image 18352134 is_animated_gif=If you say there is an elephant in the room, you mean there is an obvious problem you don't want to talk about. Couples can run into such issues often once they start living together. But not every elephant requires attention. Relationships are a give and take as well as knowing how to pick your battles.
Reddit user Jaylan96 asked "What is the harmless elephant in the room that won't affect your relationship but you never speak of?"
Here are some couples who identified issues where things are better left unsaid.
Hide & Seek
[rebelmouse-image 18350523 is_animated_gif=He continually thinks I hide his things when he can't find something.
Open & Shut Case
[rebelmouse-image 18348043 is_animated_gif=He leaves any and all doors/drawers open after getting what he needs out of them. Kitchen cabinets, the dishwasher, the microwave, bathroom vanity, closets, dressers, night stands.. I can always tell whether or not he's home when I walk through the front door. It will look like our kitchen is about to be ransacked.
I've called him out on it like twice - when I first noticed it was a trend and a time after that - and he was genuinely surprised. He was like, "you're messing with me, you opened some of those." Nope. 7 kitchen cabinets and drawers apparently had to be opened for you to make your snack - all you, babe. He sincerely apologized, but here we are 4 years later and I still just follow him around closing cabinets and drawers after he leaves the room. It's too comical to fight over, and it really doesn't even bother me terribly, so I just don't bring it up.
His & Hers
[rebelmouse-image 18352472 is_animated_gif=We've finally worked out after 13 years together that sleeping in the same room as each other just doesn't work for us and we are happier and healthier sleeping in separate rooms. Means we have to prioritize intimacy, but we are happier and saner sleeping in his and hers rooms. He snores and likes to watch movies on his iPad until the middle of the night and I wake up if a mouse rolls over two blocks away - years of sleep deprivation have taught us both that a good night's rest make us more loving partners to each other.
Crackers In Bed
[rebelmouse-image 18348038 is_animated_gif=Drives me insane that he eats in bed. Not snacks, but full meals. Spaghetti in bed. Chinese food in bed. Sushi IN BED. I freak out that he's going to spill something all over and I'm going to have to wake up to help him change the sheets again. He's a buck forty soaking wet so I don't even know where it goes.
If you asked him, it's that I never throw away a piece of paper I needed for that one class three months ago or that goat cheese in the freezer from even before then. He's constantly coming to me with two things in his hands saying I can only keep one.
Puppy Love
[rebelmouse-image 18352473 is_animated_gif=She loves the dog more than me, I know it, she knows it, the dog knows it.
I'm sure it'll be the same with the kids, but honestly it's why I'm marrying her.
Cry, Cry, Cry
[rebelmouse-image 18352474 is_animated_gif=Well since we've known each other since childhood, she remembers all the times I've cried over the stupidest things.
I dread the day she figures out how to use that against me...
Reading Is Fundamental
[rebelmouse-image 18352475 is_animated_gif=Every time we are driving by an outdoor mall or anywhere with a lot of store fronts, he will read every. Single. Store. Out. Loud. Every time.
TP
[rebelmouse-image 18352476 is_animated_gif=Every time he puts on a new toilet paper roll, he does it upside down. I flip it over every time. Sixteen years and counting.
Past Loves
[rebelmouse-image 18352477 is_animated_gif=The two relationships I was in directly before I met my wife ended when my partner died. Nothing suspicious, they both died of cancer. Different cancers. But my wife knows I miss one of them still and we never talk about it.
Cat Doo
[rebelmouse-image 18352478 is_animated_gif=From a couple I know. For the longest time the guy would walk into the bathroom and there was a number 2 in the toilet unflushed. Frustrated, he would flush and go about his day.
One day he walks in, their cat is squatting over the toilet pooping. He tells his wife about it, she says "I thought that was you?!"
Both parties were flushing the toilet, annoyed at the other one, turns out it was the cat.
Neverending Story
[rebelmouse-image 18345317 is_animated_gif=My wife is the absolute worst story teller ever. She is so smart and funny, but my goodness, her stories go on forever. She takes a story that should take 2 minutes to tell and turns it into a 25 minute story with EVERY SINGLE DETAIL that actually happened.
Checkmate
[rebelmouse-image 18345311 is_animated_gif=She once bragged about being good at chess and I beat her in 5 moves using a tactic i found on Youtube. We don't speak of chess anymore.
Tit for Tat
[rebelmouse-image 18350524 is_animated_gif=My wife leaving food out on the counter without ever putting it away disgusts me and I end up cleaning up after her every day.
I leave my socks everywhere which she finds repulsive, but she cleans them up and never says anything.
Neither of us are changing our ways so we just accept it.
Fluff & Fold
[rebelmouse-image 18352479 is_animated_gif=Neither of us puts up laundry. It's supposed to be one washes the other puts it away but neither of us do it. All our clothes just sit in baskets 99% of the time. It irks us both but we're both guilty so we keep our mouths shut.
Open & Shut Case
[rebelmouse-image 18345301 is_animated_gif=My wife doesnt screw the top back on the bottle of..... anything. Everything with a lid is a potential bomb.
Where? What?
[rebelmouse-image 18352481 is_animated_gif=80% of our marriage is one of us says
"Where's my keys?"
And the other saying "What?"
I don't think it will change,
Ours is, "What?"
"I wasn't talking to you; I was talking to myself/the cat."
"Oh ok."
Dish Duty
[rebelmouse-image 18352483 is_animated_gif=My wife uses all the dishes when she cooks. I don't even know how that's possible. I'm grateful for the meal but salty that whoever doesn't cook does the dishes.
Tales of the Glass Monkey
[rebelmouse-image 18352484 is_animated_gif=We have a trinket (small glass monkey) that started out as me putting it on his study desk in secret, to which he would then put it back on mine. Now it has escalated to being hidden in each other's stuff all around the house (underwear drawer, shoes and luggage). We have never spoken about it.
Like Signs
[rebelmouse-image 18352485 is_animated_gif=Her - leaves half finished glasses of water everywhere. Also, puts a glass of water next to the bed despite knocking it over at least twice a week.
A Life of Your Own
[rebelmouse-image 18348044 is_animated_gif=Divorce lawyer and married man here. Something I saw come up in divorces and tried to make sure was not happening in my own relationship is when one person feels they don't have a life outside their marriage and kids. That feeling will swelter and grate for years and I have seen it finally be the end of long marriages. The spouse who feels they have nothing outside of the marriage eventually blaming the other spouse. My wife works part time and is home part time, so I started being pushy about her getting out while I stayed home with the kids. (And I really did have to get pushy about it). She wound up playing on an indoor soccer team and getting drinks more regularly with friends. She would often thank me later for being insistent about her getting out and I think it helped relieve something that could have otherwise festered between us.
Comedy is in a very tricky place right now.
There is so much to NOT laugh about in this world.
In truth, many of us have forgotten how to laugh.
And certain jokes that are told, make people afraid to laugh.
So what do we do?
We tell inappropriate jokes apparently.
Let's hear some...
Redditor CrewCreation wanted to hear some "risky" comedy. So they asked:
"What’s the best morbid joke you know?"
***WARNING: THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS SENSITIVE MATERIAL. PROCEED WITH CAUTION!***
I can't think of anything hilarious at the moment. Make us LOL.
Lady
"I have this friend, love him to bits, but his wife has a tendency of just constantly showing everyone pictures of their son at every social event. At the start it was understandable, but now I'm just like 'Lady, it's been two years; they're not going to find him.'"
UnoriginalUse
at 9am...
"Not the most morbid but I love Anthony Jeselnik’s story about his neighbor who has Alzheimer’s. 'One of my next door neighbors is a 90 year old man suffering from Alzheimer’s. And every single morning at 9am he knocks on my door and asks me if I have seen his wife.'"
"'Which means that every single morning at 9am I have to explain to a 90 year old man suffering from Alzheimer’s that his wife has been dead for quite some time. Now I’ve thought about moving. I have thought about just not answering my door in the morning. But to be honest, it’s worth it… just to see the smile on his face.”
dreagan021
Comedy?
"Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is."
GW2RNGR
"Why can't orphans play tennis? They get confused when they hear love."
JayDub506
People who make comedy are evil. LOL.
The Darkness
"Dark humor is like food; not everyone gets it."
storm_the_castle
God Laughs?
"A Holocaust survivor dies and goes to heaven, where she meets God. To break the tension she tells God a joke about the Holocaust, but God doesn’t laugh. The lady shrugs and says 'I guess you had to be there.'"
“'I guess you had to be there' is a common expression used when someone doesn’t laugh at a joke. It means that the comedy may not translate without the context of the situation."
"In this case the Holocaust survivor is saying it, meaning that during the Holocaust God was nowhere to be found. It’s not really a joke about the Holocaust, but the absurdity of belief in a benevolent God. Hilarious right?"
semimillennial
Oh Baby
"How many dead babies does it take to fix a light bulb? More than 3 cause my garage is still dark."
sirnibs3
I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Because I don't know what it says about us as people if we laugh. Oye.
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Life can change in an instant.
It can always change for the better.
Just ask any lottery winner.
Sadly, life can also take a turn for the worst and leave people shattered beyond repair.
Watching someone's life fall apart in a short amount of time is difficult.
You have to wonder if there really is such a thing as karma, bad luck, or Voodoo.
Redditor OkImagination5852 wanted to hear about the times we've been witness to personal disaster. They asked:
"People who witness a person's life crumble in a single day, what happened?"
I have lived through a lot of bad days. But thankfully they've been one disaster at a time days. So I guess I'm lucky.
Horror
"A friend of a friend had his entire family killed overnight. He was from my college and was home visiting his family. His parents, siblings, and extended family were all there together. One night, while they were all asleep, his father got up, took out a gun, and went on a shooting spree. He then killed himself."
"Everyone except this guy died on the spot. When my friend visited him at the hospital, the guy was still in shock. He had no idea why his father did that. This was more than a decade ago, and I have no idea how he's doing now."
DeadOnDeparture98
The IRS Called
"Knew a guy who had a nice house, wife, 3 kids. Machine shop in his garage, Snap On tool truck, sign out front, great mechanic. Never incorporated, didn't pay taxes on his business, cash only. Took nice vacations, bought a boat, then a camper. Five years later, the IRS came. I don't know what they estimated he owed but they seized everything. He lives alone in a trailer now."
Nobody_Wins_13
2 at Once
"My mom’s dad and dad’s mom both died on the same day. Completely unrelated. We were pretty messed up for awhile. It was 2010. Mom's dad had emphysema (lifetime smoker) and was pretty sick for a few weeks. I was in college at the time and came home to be with him, because we knew he was about to pass. Dad's mom was in the nursing home, as she had had a stroke and also had dementia (she often thought I was my dad, she thought we were in the 70s, etc.)."
"She took a turn for the worst, and so my dad left the hospice my grandpa was at and went to be with her. The towns they were in were about an hour apart, so I stayed behind with my mom to comfort her when her dad passed. A few hours go by, and he passes peacefully (huge thanks to the hospice workers for their respect and grace during this time)."
"Within an hour or so of his passing, we get a call from my dad saying that his mother had passed as well. It was a terribly dark day in our family, and the next couple years for me in college were pretty much a blur. Thankfully, things got better in time and we are all doing well now."
She lost everything...
"Her husband left her after previously persuading her to remortgage their house to save his business and he's already made her take multiple credit cards out in her name. She lost everything. He did it the week after their youngest turned 18 so he wouldn't have to pay child support. He'd obviously been planning for years."
Ieatclowns
a black sheep...
"My cousin was in a motorcycle accident with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend died. She broke her back. When she was in the hospital she learned she was pregnant. It's been 16 years and we're still trying our best, she took an all too familiar path of drugs, burning bridges and more pregnancies."
"At this point she's fairly stable and clean as far as I know but a bit of a black sheep. Her mother has custody of all one of her kids. She has her youngest and seems to be doing good by her, but who knows. It's been hard on everyone, especially her mother and her brother."
Paradigm6790
Well this is the stuff of nightmares. I'm grateful for every moment I have alive.
Several lawsuits are filed...
"Here is multiple lives ruined in an instant. A friend was over at some other people house, drugs were involved. They had been playing with a gun. My friend points the gun at a girl, pulls the trigger and shoots her in the head. Girl dies, friend gets locked up until he turns 18. Parents at the house get arrested because they knew what the kids were doing. Friends mom goes into a depression and ends up getting evicted from her house. Several lawsuits are filed."
sentondan
Gone Forever
"It was me... got in a car accident and suffered a traumatic spinal and brain injury that I had no chance of surviving... a 7 vertebrae spinal fusion, yrs of physical and mental therapy... 18 yrs later and the pieces, though many forever gone, are finally coming back together."
2boneskuLL
A Bad Night
"He trashed his fathers vacation house with an axe before setting it on fire, stabbed the neighbor nearly to death, stole their car and then crashed it into a cop car so bad the cops were injured. He also got his girl pregnant, so once he is out of prison they're gonna start a family."
Dumbing_It_Down
"dangerous"
"Pregnant friend found out husband (43) was having an affair with young woman (19) who was a volunteer at their ecolodge. Friend had 'dangerous' pregnancy and had to spend a lot of time in bed. This betrayal destroyed their marriage, split the little town where they lived and caused two employees to quit because witnessing the affair going on was just too painful."
"She had a beautiful baby girl (to go with her other two girls, lol) and after the breakup was clinically depressed. Worked hard and got a divorce (she had a great lawyer); got the business back on track; beat her depression and now is planning a great vacation trip with her girls."
"Meantime, Dad has generous visitation but just 'hasn't gotten around to' buying a car seat so he can pick up the baby and for a long time asked my friend, 'Can you drop the girls off at my Mom's?'"
NoBSforGma
Lost it All...
"Recently, I know of a guy that had borrowed all his family’s life savings for the most part to participate in the whole game stop stock thing happening… he lost every penny of his money (credit card advances), and his parents retirement, and every other dime he could get… it makes me sick to even think of it."
Bangbangsmashsmash
Well those are A LOT of bad days. Good luck to all of you.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
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Those who are wealthy have the luxury of acquiring the best of the best–whether it's dinner at a Michelin-starred restaurant or status-identifying clothing from Chanel or Yves Saint Laurent.
But even the rich have their limits when it comes to frivolous spending before casting judgment on friends or colleagues.
Curious to hear examples of this, Redditor Sasquatchfl asked:
"Rich people of Reddit, what's the craziest/most unethical thing you've seen people in your circle spend money on?"
Expensive experiences were a priority over prized possessions.
Live Sushi
"An ex worked for Dell in the late 90s/early 2000s. He was pretty high up and there were lots of partiers in his work circle. Went to a party hosted by one of the dellionaires and there was a body sushi girl. I don’t know what was paid to her, but it was one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever seen."
– 5hrs4hrs3hrs2hrs1mor
Pissing Contest
"Paid a group of homeless guys to only use the bathroom on a competitors business. Eventually bought that place for a massive discount."
– Haboobalub
Let's Work Out
"My mother woke up one morning and said she felt she was way too fat and she wanted to get a treadmill. The treadmill wouldn’t be a problem, but then she saw where it would be and didn’t like the lighting. Fast forward 2 months later there’s a 40k outdoor gym built and connected to the house. She hasn’t used it once."
– Herrera5449_
Taking A Leap
"Travelled with a bunch of ex 'friends' all fairly wealthy."
"First trip to SE Asia together and as an ex-local I was a de-facto tour guide (despite not being there in over a decade)"
"They somehow found and offered a bunch of kids diving off cliffs to jump for spare change."
"They increasingly challenged each other to land their coins as close to the cliff base and small surrounding rocks for the kids to dive for."
– Satakans
It's about the finer things in life.
Expensive Party Gag
"A 3k ouija board from Gwen Paltrow's store. I didn't even know it was a thing until the dude brought it out. I really wanted to cut it up and see what it was made from. Looked nice don't get me wrong but the thing is basically a party gag. For 3 grand, it better summon a demon that's all I'm saying."
– con_this
Slow Burn
"$600 USD for a candle."
– Jeffranks
It's not always about the things you acquire.
Minor Inconvenience
"I know a guy who went to get a new drivers license and had to pay ~$100k in back parking tickets, then joked about it after."
"Apparently he couldn't get a permit to park in front of his house, so he just did anyway, and accepted like a $200 fine everyday."
– melodyze
For A Successful Election
"Not me, but I know a guy who crowd funded (read: threw a bunch of money into, then solicited more at a flea market) $80,000 toward his friend's DA election campaign. The guy won. So far, this has paid back at least $120K in avoided legal fees. I know some rich people. Most of them are more boring than you think. Hell, most of them drive Hondas, Toyotas, and Nissans."
– KP_Wrath
The Lance Corporal
"I was stationed with a Lance Corporal who was wealthy beyond means after selling some of his patents. He owned and piloted four helicopters. Lived in a palatial waterfront house in Jacksonville, NC."
"The cheapest one cost 400K. That's the one he trained on. The most expensive was about 1.2 million. That's 1.2 million 1981 dollars. The two he's got now are about 5 million each."
"Had a floating landing pad out back moored to his dock and another landing pad in the back yard. Kept two helicopters and a Rolls inside his custom-built hangar at Norfolk International Airport."
"He drove a pair of Rolls-Royces. He also toyed with a 900K Miami-Vice type speedboat. He also housed and transported his squad to Camp Lejeune and back in a custom mini-bus."
– ApplicationConnect55
The dude was very giving and lived a very clean life. He'd fly us to Norfolk, pickup the car and we'd do our shopping and eating. Hop in a chopper and return home. He'd fly his fire team down to Miami on weekends. He kept a Limo there and wore a chauffer's outfit and did all the driving.
He bought a full-service and licensed pub in Northern Ireland. He lives there with his wife. Does a lot of charity work there. We still keep in touch."
– ApplicationConnect55
When there's plenty of money going around, there's no need to worry about a single thing.
That peace of mind is a luxury in itself.
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When marriages or relationships fall apart, infidelity is not always the cause.
Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor Liam_Tang asked:
"People who've divorced, aside from adultery, what were the irreconcilable differences that ended the marriage?"

You think you know a person when you walk down the aisle.
These Redditors were in for a rude awakening.
Pet Neglect
"My wife divorced her ex for many reasons, but the final straw was when she went out of town for a few days, and when she got back he had not fed or given water to the dog. The dog lived a long and happy life after that."
– StrangeCrimes
Obsessed With A Crush
"Not me, but I had an old coworker that divorced his wife for spending their entire savings on candy crush and games of the same type."
– Hexis40
Compatibility Musts
"ITT: Intimacy (sex/romance), beliefs (religion/spirituality/politics), kids, and I haven’t seen it yet but it’s coming: finances."
"The big four. You REALLY need to discuss these things in detail BEFORE getting married."
– rabbiskittles
Physical violence is a legit reason for people to peace out of a relationship.
The Flattening
"She threatened to hit me with a hammer."
– michaelrohansmith
Hitting The Bottle
"She became an abusive alcoholic. It was sad but I had to get out."
– diegojones4
Emotional pain is too damaging to recover from.
Truth Hurts
"She told me as we stood in front of the judge ending our 7 year marriage, 'I never loved you, I just wanted kids.'"
– Pinch_Dogs
Can't Fix Angry
"She was beautiful/smart but an angry angry person. I thought I could be sweet to her and 'fix' that. Heh. She kicked the crap out of me emotionally. Wife II has been a walk in the roses for 32 years now :)"
– lowlandr
A change of heart is worthless if comes too late.
"We Could've Had A Nice Marriage
"He could not understand that my wants and needs were as important as his wants and needs. We tried to make it work for 7 years. During that time, for things that were really important to me, I tried explaining logically, asking nicely, begging, crying, yelling, passive aggressiveness... cycled back through all of these options multiple times."
"(If I knew something was important to him, I would do that. For example, he was really into sports, so I went to all his events, even though that is not at all my thing.) When I finally threw up my hands and told him it was time to get a divorce, he suddenly panicked and said 'What can I do? Do you want me to do half the chores? I'll do it! Do you want me to get a job? I'll do it! Do you want me to buy you presents for your birthday? I'll do it!'"
"So, in other words, he could have been doing that all along, but just couldn't be bothered. That made me so angry. We could have had a nice marriage that we both enjoyed, but no, by the time he saw the light, that ship had sailed."
"We are both happily remarried now (to different people) and I joke that his new wife owes me a thank you note. It was his experience with me that taught him to listen to her and take her needs seriously."
– Bluebird-True
"What Can I Do?"
"My ex was exactly like this. I didn't marry him but when I told him let's break up, he went all like, what can I do? Let's get engaged, let's look at houses, etc. Basically all the pre-marriage topics that we should be discussing about after being together for 7 years."
"I got so angry and straight up told him it's too late... I don't need you anymore."
– gudetarako
As much as a couple wants to stay together, unforeseen circumstances can eventually tear people apart.
Very few people can maintain healthy long-distance relationships.
When a new job opportunity takes a significant other away, would you begrudge them for wanting a better position to earn more money? Or is it better for them to reluctantly turn down the opportunity so they could stay with you? Do either scenarios breed resentment?
These were questions I've often asked myself with past relationships, and my answers varied depending on the person I was with.
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