The idea of a "scale" or being in/out of someone's league is kind of passe, we'll admit. Still, there's something about a major change in your partner that can spawn a few questions or concerns.
It's perfectly natural to wonder if things will change once you or your partner makes a big change and there are questions about whether you're still in one another's "league." This can be particularly true since the physical change = relationship change trope has been drilled into a lot of us since childhood.
Reddit user jwburner asked:
People who are or have been in a relationship where you're partner transformed (lost weight, grew out of their acne/awkwardness, got muscular, etc) into someone "out of your league." How did everything play out?
So look, we're not going to lie to you. A lot of these end terribly. That's not much of a surprise. However - there are some responses here that are enough to renew our faith in real love; regardless of anyone's "league."
I dated a girl who, while she didn't exactly change, started putting more effort into her appearance. She assumed I didn't like the "new" her; getting her nails done and going tanning. Truthfully I didn't mind one way or another. I think it gave her a confidence boost.
Which was good until she got confident enough to cheat on me, citing that I "didn't fit with her new lifestyle."
My significant other was born with hemifacial microsomia (basically no muscle tissue in her right cheek) and last year she got the seventh and last surgery to correct it.
I've always considered her to be out of my league. The confidence and love for herself that she gained after the surgery was amazing. Seeing her go from a shy girl who absolutely hated having her picture taken to randomly sending me selfies saying things like "I look good today" makes me tear up. I'm so happy to have been a part of her transformation.
Former Male Model
I've got it the other way - my significant other of 25+ yrs was a successful male model and pro athlete. A goodly proportion of his self esteem came from his looks and physicality. A few years ago he ended up in a wheelchair, getting a horrible cancer. He's aged, to put it mildly, and his legs have wasted away.
It's come out that in the back of his mind he thinks I'll leave him because he's not the man he was. Silly guy. I've always loved him for his big heart and disposition. He really hasn't changed at all in my eyes.
My husband's always been out of my league. I'm definitely no higher than a 5 and I'm aging like milk. He has loved me unconditionally since we were teenagers. Obviously, I feel the same. Some people are just meant for each other.
My husband began dry-curing meats for a living. Suddenly he's got the sexiest set of guns and he smells like bacon. Random women have begun flirting with him. Now he dramatic-casual shows off his wedding ring a lot.
Money Changes People
My partner went from making around 30k a year (similar to what I was making) to making $150k a year after a few years. My income didn't change much except for normal raises. Partner's job also came with a lot of travel, international included.
It changed him drastically, to the point that he started sleeping with other girls while out of town and taking them on his trips. We're obviously not together anymore.
Put The Weight Back On
I was with a guy for years and I lost some weight, got pretty toned changed my hair and got a better job. None of it changed me, but it changed him. He started getting really paranoid about the male friends that I'd had for years- none of whom had been an issue before my transformation.
He started trying to stop me from going out and got super paranoid. He wanted me to stop going to the gym and to put the weight back on. It ended our relationship.
My ex boyfriend went from chubby to body building competitions in the 2 years we dated. He went from being sweet to self absorbed and told me "There's a drop dead gorgeous girl at my gym you should workout so you can look like her."
I ran half marathons and was in great shape at the time. He also started eating the same thing every meal, so no more dinner or ice cream dates.
My wife would turn every head in the room when she walked into it. She fell in love with my writing (read some of my stuff, tracked me down and asked me out). I'm not usually flustered around women, but when I took my first look I said to myself "Well, it looks like we're just going to be friends."
At the end of the date she said, "Hey, let's go mountain biking next Saturday!" I said, "Great!" At the time, I was heavily into competitive Mt. Biking and I found out she was able to keep up with me. We ended up being Mountaineering guides, buying a sailboat and living on it for 7 years, sailing across oceans.
After we got married I asked her, "So what was it? Why'd you want to marry me?" She replied, "You're the first person (man) I've come across that really listened to me. You're also the first man to have cared for and respect my intelligence. You're also a good man Dean, and cute!"
"You mean I'm not handsome?"
Wife: "Oh no! You're just cute! So why'd you decided to marry me Dean?"
Me: "Your boobs."
And then we laughed our butts off.
She was my one. The love of my life. Passed away this last may from breast cancer. She asked me once if I wanted to cut out 'cause her condition was getting very poor, she needed a lot of care and her physical beauty had faded. I replied, "Babe, there isn't a person on this planet or a situation that could take me away from you. You and me baby...all the way." And that's how it was.
Do It For The 'GramGiphy
She was really cute and nerdy, and our biggest thing on a Sunday was reading comics and talking about dumb things. She made a friend at work who got her into makeup. She got really good at it and it was fun for a while, but then the things that we bonded over fell to the wayside and our Sunday's turned to her being insta famous and going out to parties and stuff.
Instead of just rocking up to see each other I had to give her notice to do her make up. She started to get more insecure about her looks and needed constant compliments. Then she dumped me because we didn't "look good as a couple in photos" anymore.
She even moved to a different city for better photo opportunities and that's when I finally deleted her off Instagram.
Former partner of mine went from cute to hot. And while that did not make her out of my league, she suddenly became much more insecure about things. It was weird.
I lost 50ish pounds and for awhile anyone I talked to would bring it up/compliment me. Weirded me out so much...like stop reminded me of my flesh prison, please.
I went from being short and chubby to tall and slim and counted as generally attractive but due to not being raised my whole life as a "attractive" person it causes me to be shy and awkward.
A Younger Version
Well, he got his braces off, decent glasses, found pants that were long enough, his acne (from 'roid use) cleared up and he found the right weight gain shake.
He cheated on me and left me for a younger version of me :)
My ex boyfriend was one of those people that didn't really take care of himself and so he was very quiet because people used to tease him for it. I got him into the routine of showering every other day and ironing his clothes and he started to be more confident ... confident enough to cheat on me three times. Now he's a druggie and looks gross once again. Now no one will date him anymore.
A New Human
When my wife began dating me I was in the process of losing weight and getting fit. She was well out of my league (and still is) but at least I don't look like I've had 2 chocolate cakes for lunch anymore.
So far so good. We go to the gym together most days and we also created a new human together. The new human is particularly noisy.
When I met my boyfriend, he was constantly down on himself because none of the girls he liked before me ever liked him and he thought there was something wrong with him. I watched him transform from a shy not confident guy into an amazing outgoing person with a charismatic personality.
Last week he wrote a paper for school about how I helped him grow out of his "sad stage" and it made me tear up :)
I was dating a girl very tentatively - everyone knew we were a couple, but we had never even kissed, just did everything together and everyone treated us like a couple. Then I started training to be a fighter. I got super-ripped, got promotions at work, started winning some fights (ring, not street) and lots of other girls started hanging around.
This girl, whom I loved dearly, stopped wanting to see me, quit her job and moved cities. It almost broke me. She was probably 'The One'. I've never seen her since and I've never considered marrying anyone else.
My girlfriend kept thinking I would cheat on her because I wasn't fat. Over time, she broke my exercise/eating habits so I gained 60 lb. Married me, but now doesn't find me very attractive anymore, so no sexy times.
I Left Her
I left her... although she was beautiful, but she had issues and got drunk so fast and so often. Beauty wasn't all I needed... I needed a partner.
I'm currently losing weight to fix some health issues I have, and my boyfriend is gaining weight and he's really insecure about it. He keeps thinking I'll leave him when I'm "out of his league." I've asked him if he wants to work out with me or go on a similar diet, but he doesn't want to. I'm not going to force him to do something he doesn't want to do, but he knows the offer is there.
He's always going to be my big cuddly teddy bear, and I'll love him no matter what sizes we are or what we look like.
Chubby Girl With A Hidden Talent
My girlfriend was the chubby girl people picked on and never chose for their team in high school. She got her PhD and a great job. In the past two years she's discovered a hidden talent for endurance sports and has consistently podiumed in every race she's competed in this past year.
She's now slim, successful, smart, and wildly athletic. To me she hasn't changed a bit and neither have I in her eyes. We're pretty happy as things are. We've just got new hobbies and encourage each other as we go through life together.
Caught On Early
Just to preface this whole thing, I'm not a 10/10 knockout or anything but I think most people would consider me to be pretty. I met my husband in high school when his hobbies included weed, video games, and playing guitar badly. He was chubby, short, going through an emo phase, and covered in bad acne. My father hated him. Obviously he stole my heart immediately.
When we got out of high school he worked mainly in fast food while I was a college student. He lived with his parents. My sisters were sure we'd break up and tried to convince me I could do better, but he's my best friend so I didn't care in the slightest. While I was in college he thought about going into the military, so he started working out daily. He got very fit very fast, and decided he no longer wanted to be in the military but wanted to go back to school. Just getting older and changing his diet cleared up his acne. Going back to school got him interested in dressing better. No other way to say it, he glowed up!
He's now on his way to being an electrical engineer, is still my best friend, and is honest to god out of my league in looks/physique. I'm crazy lucky that I caught on early and saw that potential. (And that bone structure)
He Cheated On Me AnywayGiphy
Along similar lines, I lost 30 lbs and grew out my hair while I was with my boyfriend because I thought I would be more attractive. He cheated on me anyway, now I don't determine my worth by my fears about what others will think of me :)
Traveling is one of life's greatest pleasures. To see new places, meet new people, and witness different cultures in action can be both a thrilling and rewarding experience.
But travel can also feel intimidating, especially if you've only just started to get a feel for it. What do you pack? What if you forget something?
And when you get to your destination, how should you behave in order to blend in and to avoid making yourself an easy target for scams and the like?
People shared their best advice with us after Redditor swankyhank asked the online community:
"What travel tips do only the pros know?"
"Know the rules/laws/currency exchange rates for the country you are going to. Ignorance is not a get out of jail free card."
This is so important. You should know it and come prepared! It'll save you a big headache later.
"Do not entertain..."
"Do not entertain people asking questions in other countries."
Similarly, know the common scams for wherever you're going. If you travel around it's inevitable that you'll be targeted at some point, probably more than once.
"My tip is to download..."
"My tip is to download the map of the towns you are visiting. You can do that easily in the Google Maps app. If you have the map downloaded on your phone you can easily find your way around town even if you don't have any internet connection."
"It won't show you the route you should walk from A to B, but through the magic of GPS you will still see where you currently are and if you are moving in the right direction."
Google Translate as well. You can download an entire language onto your phone, and type back and forth.
Obviously don’t physically hand your phone to someone else, unless it’s like a hotel concierge, and not a random guy at the metro station who might just run off with it.
"If you are traveling in a group..."
"If you are traveling in a group, give yourself breaks from others. Some people want to do everything together, and that can lead to a lot of fighting."
Indeed. Getting some alone time to wander or nap or whatever can make or break a trip.
"Clean or at least..."
"Clean or at least leave your home in some state of clean prior to leaving on your trip. It feels terrible to come home to a mess when you're likely exhausted from a plane or long road trip. Especially if you have to work the next day."
Yes! It is such a relief and I always make sure to clean before I head out anywhere.
"You are allowed..."
"You are allowed to have your ID and boarding pass out and ready before your turn in the security line. You don't have to begin fumbling for these things only once it is your turn to go."
I seriously don’t get how people don’t understand this. It's so frustrating.
"If you don't know..."
"If you don’t know where you’re going, walk and act like you do anyway."
Same goes for any busy location, metro, train station, bus station, busy park...
"If you're going on vacation..."
"If you’re going on vacation and can swing one more day of time off, take it after you arrive home and give yourself an extra day to mentally prepare and get organized."
A vacation from your vacation. This is the way.
"Navigate before going..."
"Navigate before going into a massive crowd. A simple mind map of 'right in three blocks, left in two' usually suffices for the walk, and makes you look like you're walking with purpose, instead of standing out immediately as a target."
Excellent advice. The less you stand out, the better for you (and anyone in your party).
"It's worth it..."
"It’s worth it to pay more for accommodations in the city center close to all the action rather than a cheaper place far away. It’s less stress and you have to pay for transport back and forth anyway."
Very important. I am generally quite frugal but spending the extra money to have a place close to the airport saves a lot of time and makes the trip relatively stress free.
Get out there, young traveler! There's so much to see! And watch out for pickpockets. They're always around.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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Sleep is one of those elusive things that people go to any lengths to get.
Some take meds, some have a nightcap, and others ... well others get down with their imaginations.
Reddit user EDBTZ asked:
"What fake scenario do you imagine while falling asleep?"
I'll admit, the scenarios that play out in my head when I let my imagination wander are often "interesting" - but I'm glad to know I'm not the only one!
Check out these sleepyheady Imagineers.
Bed Bunswrong turn cabin GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy
"I picture myself in the middle of the forest and it’s blizzarding."
"There are obviously dangerous creatures all around."
"But I’m in my weather-and-monster-proof cabin all wrapped up like a cinnamon bun in my king size bed."
"Gotta have the monsters to emphasize the safety in the imaginary stronghold. They're much easier to keep out than the stressful thoughts."
"This just sounds like what it’s like living here in rural Canada lol"
"I like to think about an imaginary tortoise walking around in a desert eating little flowers and cactus."
"I dont know why, but imagining that little guy always puts my mind at ease. When I am at the dentist getting a cavity drilled or a tooth extracted, I try to dissociate by imagining that tortoise."
"For whatever reason, its become a coping mechanism for me."
"This is lovely. I hope the tortoise has a name."
"Wait this is so cute"
In The Igloo
"Have done this semi-regularly (weekly) for at least 15 yrs."
"I'm in a tiny igloo with my head facing the entrance. There is a small fire in the entrance with wolves growling at me on the other side of the entrance."
"Strangely it's extremely comforting because I know nothing can get to me."
"I'm usually asleep within 10 seconds of my head touching the pillow."
"I used to do this one a lot as a kid!"
"I would even place my head under a long pillow imagining that was the igloo entrance."
"How odd. When I was a kid I would have recurring dreams about sleeping in an igloo."
In RecoveryBlack And White Hospital GIF by National WWI Museum and MemorialGiphy
"This is so stupid, but here we go. I've disabled and have chronic pain problems, so I always go to bed with some kind of bad ache or cramp to keep me awake."
"At some point, I got into the habit of daydreaming that I was injured and am recovering."
"Sometimes I'm a soldier, or on an alien ship, sometimes I'm an SCP, or a Marvel villain turned good."
"Sometimes its angsty, sometimes more sweet."
"Whatever the background, it's always that I have many people around to care for me, I'm finally safe from whatever situation harmed me, and I can relax and sleep away the pain."
"My therapist surprisingly encouraged it as a coping mechanism when I told her about it. It works wonders."
"This is very weird, but it used to be a lot of fun lol."
"When I was a kid, I had this big window near my bed. So, before getting into bed, I’d imagine that there was a spooooky witch gliding towards my window and I’d have to jump underneath the blankets in time, before she saw me."
"I’d cover myself up real quick and fall asleep."
"I did something similar as a kid."
"Only instead of a witch, I imagined a burglar creeping through my house ready to kill anyone who was awake."
"I'd practice looking like I was asleep so I'd fool him. (Mouth slightly open, jaw relaxed, deep but not too deep breaths, eyes gently closed, not squeezed shut) "
"Worked every time. Never got murdered and always fell asleep."
"I build a house."
"I go through many different types of homes: Mini homes, big mansions, modest style homes, or even bus homes. But I build it in my mind as I walk through it."
"It’s a good imagination tool that doesn’t keep your brain too active but still has you in a 'dream' like scenario."
"I do this too! Never realized someone else would do the same :)"
"There they are. My fellow bedtime architects/landscapers/interior designers."
"I'm glad to be a part of this club!"
"I'm always building an off-grid cabin in the woods."
"I enjoy the idea of thinking how to build it and what the layout would be like. Then the extra fun is trying to rig solar, deal with water, sort out heating and cooling, and then throwing in a toilet."
"I’d like to think I’m floating in the middle of the ocean."
"The water is so still with no other sound than that of my own breath. Looking up, not a single cloud in sight only a beautiful blue sky kissed by the sun."
"I close my eyes, take a deep breath and submerge myself."
"I open my eyes, staring into the dark abyss. I’m sinking."
"The light from above fades. Darkness engulfs me but then…I see lights.. are they stars? They are."
"I’m floating through space. Passing by stars and cosmic events that have no true words to describe them when witnessed first hand."
"Anyways that’s how nights usually go."
"Getting kidnapped and taken to Mexico to be sold - but before I am, I try to escape."
"One of the workers there, who was also kidnapped, catches me; but he helps me and ends up escaping with me. From then on, he and I are on the run from Mexican traffickers."
"We have to stay low for a week before we can fly out of there. During that time we have to stay in a small motel room to lay low. He takes me out to the woods to teach me to shoot guns and fight and sh*t just in case things go bad. We know they'll probably go bad."
"We have a few moments that make me wonder if I have feelings for him?"
"We’re eventually able to get to the airport, but the bad guys are there and he has to protect me. We are able to make a dramatic getaway, during which we admit that we've fallen in love."
"But then he is charged with helping the bad guys so he has to go to prison even though he was there against his will!"
"I wait a year for him, pining and counting down every moment until we eventually reunite and get married."
Natalie Imbrugliamusic video 90s GIFGiphy
"About 25 years ago I was a a teen with a crush on Natalie Imbruglia (she was getting famous with Torn videoclip)."
"My imaginary scenario before falling asleep at night was attending one of her live exhibitions and saving her from a terrorist."
"Her body guards were useless and the terrorist ran up the stage, but I was faster! I climbed on the stage and KO-ed the terrorist with a karate kick (and no, I didn't even do karate, but karate stuff and flippy-kicks vibed hard in the 90s! It grew in our DNA)."
"In the backstage, she thanked me and we started making out. Of course..."
How My Species Is
"It’s kind of out there but here it goes:"
"I imagine a group of authority figures (usually scientists or doctors) 'discovering' me. I’m the last of my species."
"They have no ill intentions towards me, and in fact want to care for me. They force me to relax and rest, sometimes against my will. They bring me food and entertainment but most spend time just cuddling me and making me feel safe."
"They study what I like and don’t like, and praise me over the littlest things. I’m allowed to be as weird as I want and it’s ok cause that’s just how my species is."
"I am an autistic who went through a very rough childhood, so a fantasy where I’m being cared for and cooed over despite my differences doesn’t surprise me."
So now that you know what other people are thinking about, it's your turn to spill - especially if it's as delightfully odd as karate for Natalie Imbruglia.
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Ever take a look online?
It certainly feels like everything about the world, as of writing, is awful, terrible, and just downright no good. While there's positives out there to be found, don't purposefully overlook the subjectively bad stuff.
There's knowledge to be gained from this practice, so be sure to look at the dark and bleak facts of the world.
"What are some simple yet incredibly disturbing/scary facts?"
Our lives are fragile, and important, so it's critical you keep an eye out for yourself. Odds are if you blink, you might end up another number within these stats.
The Stats Change On How Many Years It Takes To Solve
"1/3 of US murders go unsolved."
"That’s a relief."
"On average since 1965, sure, but in 2019 the solve rate was 58%. In 2020 it was 50%."
*peaks out the window
"If you live in a major city there is a nuke aimed at you"
"I live on the outskirts of a city in the top 100 American targets. Out of morbid curiosity I looked some blast radius maps when Putin said to get them ready. Anything smaller than the largest theoretical nuke ever designed (never built) puts me squarely in the "everything will be on fire but you'll probably survive the initial blast with severe burns if you're inside when it happens" so that was a fun night"
On Your Feet, Soldiers
"Despite literally all war propaganda from every country saying otherwise, you are not going to make an individual impact in glorious battle and die valiantly in a hail of bullets. Statistically, you are overwhelmingly more likely to be killed by an explosive device launched miles away by a vehicle you will never see, long before you ever get a chance to pull the trigger."
"Which, relatively, is such a new human experience. To quote Dan Carlin (Hardcore History) "I am fascinated by the extremes of the human experience."
"It used to be that a single, well trained, well armed soldier on a battlefield, who is physically imposing could single handedly turn the tide of a battle. The Romans used to fear the Gallic tribes to the north, because while the average Roman soldier was around 5'3-5'5, the average Gallic warrior was more like 5'10 to 6'. That used to mean something, EVERYTHING. I mean, I myself am 5'8, and I sure as hell wouldn't want to fight hand-to-hand combat with someone 6 inches taller and at least 30 pounds heavier than me if I was given the choice."
"In the modern era, it means jack sh-t. A 6 foot 200 pound soldier goes down to bullets and artillery all the same as his 5'6 comrades. Infantry combat from the American Civil War onward is just a glorified meat grinder. The winning side is the one with the most expendable soldiers, and no individual can change that anymore, at least not on a battlefield. Today, it's more about the technology than ever before, since the most technologically advanced countries are nearing being able to fight, and win, a war without ever having any actual boots on the ground. It's fascinating how far we've come in just a couple thousand years"
Animals are walking encyclopedias or fascinating information, and we're all at the mercy of them if they decide one day they don't feel like eating the things they're used to eating.
In Short Supply Of Iron
"If given access to it, butterflies will happily drink blood."
Meat Is Good. Hard To Argue With That.
"Bored ducklings can become cannibals!"
"The amount of animals that are opportunistic cannibals or even carnivores would shock some people."
"Yeah, there aren't a whole lot of actual herbivores in nature. Deer, horses, cows, and most other 'herbivores' love eating insects and other small animals when the opportunity presents itself."
Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Back In The Water
"sharks have been around for at least 420 million years, meaning they have survived four of the “big five” mass extinctions. That makes them older than humanity, older than Mount Everest, older than dinosaurs, older even than trees. Yet we could potentially see them extinct in our lifetime"
The world is an interesting place, and we'll keep on learning as the days go on. Whether it's about the human mind, or whether it's about the gigantic illusion we all find ourselves living in, it'll always be something to gain knowledge from.
Reading This Late At Night? Go To Sleep.
"Moving back the start time for school in an area resulted in 70% less car accidents."
"Similarly at each daylight saving, heart attacks and accidents decrease with an hour of extra sleep and increase with an hour less of sleep."
"Sleep is crazy important."
Cotard's syndrome, also called "walking corpse syndrome," is a condition wherein the patient believes they are dead, dying, missing parts of their bodies, or don't exist.
Some people with Cotard's syndrome may stop speaking or eating since they believe they're dead.
I would like to add its extremely rare and that most medical professionals will never encounter it.
When You Can't Trust The People In Front Of You
"Capgras Syndrome is a mental delusion where you believe that the people closest to you have been replaced by impostors"
"This will probably get buried in the amogus spam but the theory behind how it works is actually super fascinating, basically it turns out that there are two independent facial recognition processes instead of one, where one is subconscious and emotional and the other is conscious and objective; This is evidenced by research showing that people who developed facial blindness (a really interesting subject in its own right) due to brain damage would still subconsciously react to faces of people they had been familiar with before their condition, so essentially in FB the conscious level of facial recognition breaks down even if the subconscious level doesn't, but Capgras is the inverse of that where the conscious level remains intact but the subconscious level breaks down so you recognize that they're physically indistinguishable from the person you know but that emotional and familial connection with them that tells you that they are who they are just stops firing."
Maybe Humanity Was A Mistake
"Egyptian mummies wouldn’t be so rare today if the Victorian British hadn’t eaten most of them."
"Wow, that was something I never knew or imagined. Thank you. History of Eating Corpses as Medicine"
Mmwah! Good Night, Everybody.
"You have no way of really knowing if everyone experiences reality and consciousness the same way you do."
"You really have no way of knowing if you are experiencing "reality" at all. You could be a brain in a box, a delusional god, an alien's computer science experiment for their 4th grade science fair..."
Don't let facts like this get you down. There is, you just have to go find it.
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It can be hard when a relationship has run its course, when there's no more gas left in the tank but you keep pushing the proverbial car forward hoping to reach your destination.
Sometimes you need to leave the car at the side of the road and keep making your way on foot. It's okay to ditch a bad relationship, and it'll be better for all parties involved in the long run.
You just have to know what signs to look for, and thankfully, the internet can provide a litany of examples.
Reddit user, Nonchalant_Calypso, wanted to know when the magic ended when they asked:
"What was the moment you knew your relationship was over?"
Your relationship should be something that brings you joy, on a near daily basis. If there's a repeated sense of dread then maybe it's time for a talk.
Knowing You Have To Spend Any Amount Of Time With Them
"When she came up on caller id and my first thought was 'Ugh.'"
"I had a similar feeling in my first marriage. I'd come home, turn onto our street, see her car already in the driveway, and have the same feeling... 'ugh.'"
When The Drama Is Never-Ending
"When you dread her name coming up on caller ID because you knew it was an argument about nothing. Don’t settle for an angry life."
When You Don't Smile Like You Used To
"I was at my best friend's wedding. When he saw his bride walking down the aisle, he had a grin so big it looked like it could have exploded right off of his face. He was so happy to be marrying this person. And when I thought about my, now-ex, gf I realized that I just didn't feel that way about her."
"I will say, when I married my wife, I was grinning like an idiot."
When Your Day Night Is Awful
"When I realized I dreaded Fridays, our standard date night, and saw it as something I needed to get past before I could start enjoying the weekend."
Sometimes you look at a relationship through foggy lenses, unaware of how terrible your partner actually is.
Because once you realize it, wow, there's no going back.
When The Cheating Was Going To Happen Right In Front Of You
"My ex & I were not living together, but he had the key to my place. I told him that I was gonna go see my parents for the weekend, but then changed my mind last minute because I started feeling sick. I forgot to tell him & just went home after work & went to bed. I woke up around 10pm to get a glass of water & while I was in the kitchen I heard someone fumbling at the door with the lock. I freaked out because I lived on the 17th floor, so if it was a break in, I was f-cked. All of a sudden he walks in..... dragging a tipsy girl in behind him."
"I just stood there while he tried to make up some sort of excuse as to WHY he was there. The girl was pretty shocked too."
When They SUCK
"When I was going through a miscarriage and he couldn’t take me to the ER because he was in fantasy leagues and football was on."
"Damn that goes way beyond just not loving you anymore and into worthless piece of sh-t territory."
When They SUCK. Hard.
"She poisoned my cat 🐈 Mr Noodle"
"Edit: Thanks everybody for the support, and if you're asking: yeah I got the police involved"
No one likes the talk, and even fewer people will act on it the moment they feel it, but what will hurt worse? The talk or letting your relationship reach these levels?
When You Fade From Their View
"You can see it in their eyes when they don't love you anymore."
"I'll never forget that feeling."
"You absolutely can. It's like they are looking past you, yet right at you.. ugg. It's terrible .. Been there a few times."
Cheating, Sure, But Completely Misreading The Situation
"The day my mom passed away (the coroner hadn't even come for her body yet) with zero consideration on how I felt and what I was going through my ex-fiancé thought it was great idea and a good time to tell me he has been cheating on me for the last 6 years, and how sorry he was for it."
"He wasn't sorry he did it, but he sorry because the other woman had lied to him about who she really was and he wanted me to comfort him because he felt betrayed by her...."
"When I promptly broke up with him, he asked "wait is this really goodbye?" how could you do this to me now?"
When They Look For The Right Moment In The Wrong Time
"Yeah. Long time girl friend broke it off between us after my Father died. Basically, she felt since I would feel less grief then over us, as I was already feeling so bad about Pop's passing. I later learned, this happens a lot."
Don't feel bad when it has to end. Think of it as a fresh start for you both and make the tough call.
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