Most of us were raised in some sort of faith.
Church is a part of the communities of America, and church groups often have outings together, camps, bake sales, festivals--it can be a really inclusive experience, if you fit in.
But churches also have serious problems. Bigotry, indoctrination, taking large quantities of money from its parish--and sometimes those things can send people away.
u/TrespassWill asked:
[Serious] Christians turned atheists, what made you lose your faith?
Here were some of those answers.
Bad Luck
GiphyShort answer: grew up southern Baptist.
When I started getting to the age where I could think critically about things, I just started noticing some inconsistencies. Specifically, I was told that people who believed in other religions would go to hell because they followed the "wrong" religion. What?? When religion is based a lot on where you are born, I just could not truly believe that people would be sent to hell for being born in the "wrong" country.
Money Money Money
Taking a mythology class in college and realizing all the different religions had similar origin stories of how earth and man were created and evolved, but the details differed based on the environment the people lived in and how far along they were technologically. Anything science couldn't explain was the will of a higher power.
Not saying higher powers COULDN'T exist, just realized people are killing each other because theirs is the 'right God', but the people don't realize that for all intents and purposes, they are all following the similar lessons/stories.
I also believe religion is separate from its organization structure. I think being spiritual and believing in a higher power is okay - it has helped mankind cope with the terrifying unknown. Anybody telling you that God wants you to donate money to them so that their leader can live in a super mansion or own an airplane is a liar. Last I checked, none of that money ever gets trickled up to a deity.
Doctrine
Being told to not question my faith made me lose my faith, if I cannot question what I believe in to better understand it then it wasn't worth believing in it in the first place. Or they are hiding something they don't want me to find out, which makes me even more skeptical of it.
Also reading beyond the selected passages in my bible study classes? Whoa, there is a LOT of messed up stuff in the bible and you would get in trouble! for reading more than just the cherry picked parts they only wanted you to know. Contradictions Galore!
Self-Care
I was in a hard time for me and I started praying, attending catholic activities and doing lots of other things like these. I wasn't feeling better. Years after I gave up doing these things and started taking care of me by myself and now I'm happy. So the faith gradually went away. I'm not fully an atheist tho, I may be an agnostic but I'm not sure.
A Made-Up God
I started to read the Bible.
Then it was gradual. First I did not believe that the god in the Bible was good and created my own personal god. Then I realized that I was making up a god and started to question if everyone else was doing the same. That's when I started questioning, but felt guilty about it and had conversations with god like "You cannot be angry that I am questioning. If you wanted me to believe you shouldn't have left all of this gaps and contradictions." Eventually I became an atheist.
The Business Of Oppression
The Church did it for me. When I started to understand that it was a business. For profit and for power and for influence. When it started to become political. The final straw was when I started to see how much hypocrisy there is, by way of prejudice, and hate.
When Nobody Helps You But You
Was heavily indoctrinated with young earth creationism as a child. Stopped believing in the literal truth of the Bible in college when confronted with extensive evidence to the contrary. Was still very religious, with faith in the moral truth of the Bible. Got engaged to a conservative Christian in medical school, it ended badly. Realized after the fact that Christianity did nothing to prevent the emotional abuse I had suffered by the hands of my mother growing up and my ex as an adult. In fact, faith actively facilitated it in many ways. Hence, not a reliable source of moral truth, too subject to personal interpretation. Put faith on hold. A year later, realized I was happier not going to church. About another year later (just recently), discovered my beliefs align much more cleanly with secular humanism.
The Lies Fell Apart
I spent my early childhood education years in a Christian school. That age is easy to manipulate. The economy tanked when I was entering 5th grade and I had to go to a public school because my parents couldn't afford to send me to a private school. I gradually started to doubt my faith as I was exposed to people from different cultures and religions. I was told by teachers to be weary of people at public schools because they're awful people who will poison my mind. As I got older the lies fell apart. I became an Atheist at 18 and unfortunately I lost a lot of people I thought were my friends.
People Cycling Out
Church politics put me off a lot. I grew up in generally friendly churches full of well-meaning people, but when I was in my teens there was some trouble with the ministers (a husband and wife couple) that were there at the time. They were a bit too evangelical with their sermons compared to the rest of the denomination, and also had some personality clashes with the rest of the church leadership.
After a few years of listening to my parents gossip and grumble, the ministers were sent off to somewhere else and we got a new one. (Not that my parents had any part in that happening, just that that's how I knew about it at all.)
It was hardly the only reason I stopped believing, but it really made me see how these were all just humans, doing their own things, and trying to make their community the way they wanted it.
Everything's Beautiful, Nothing's Real
GiphyI wish I could point to a specific factual source or analytical process or real, concrete and rational justification for my loss of faith like others in this thread, but I can't.
What happened is that I reached my teenage years after being a dutiful believing Catholic my whole life and just...began feeling like it wasn't real. Suddenly I went to court and saw that the emperor had no clothes. I didn't like church, I didn't like all the youth stuff I had to do, and I put my foot down and declared that I would not be following through with confirmation.
The intellectual stuff and the reading and the Sagan and Dawkins and all the other junior atheist bro phase came later. But it started with simply feeling one day that it wasn't real.
“'Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience'.” What's your best real life example of this?"
They Literally Won't be "Shut Down"
"When I tell people to just reboot your computer and it will fix all their problems and yet they won't because they said if you wait long enough it will shut down, when in reality it only goes to sleep."
"Then when I tell them they have to completely shut it down they look at me like I'm an idiot and say they did."
"I tell them it seems like it but it only went to sleep."
"They argue back."- niallaa
Some People Just Don't Get It...
"I used to argue a lot with my sister when we were kids."
"She would do this thing where she would say something, and then I would reference back to it literally a minute or two later to prove a point and she would say 'I never said that' or 'that’s not what I said'."
"Absolutely impossible to argue with someone who will just deny having said things that could hurt their argument."
"Also, trying to change the course of an argument if they feel like they are 'losing'."
"A coworker once called me an idiot for doing something 'incorrectly' when I was actually doing it the right way."
"When I politely explained to them that the way they suggested doing the task didn’t actually work, they started asking 'why are you getting so angry?? I was just trying to help' etc."
"So now we’re arguing about whether I’m angry or not instead of the right way to complete the task."- themightypianocat
Facts Are Facts...
"Arguing is pointless if you do not agree on a set of facts."- niallaa
Facts GIF by Judge JerryGiphyYou Can't Have It Both Ways...
"For a short while, I worked as a line cook at a Cracker Barrel, and there was a little saloon style door that led to the staff section (kitchen, bathroom, etc)."
"There was a staff only sign on the door, above the doors, and on the wall behind the doors at eye level."
"Usually if someone from the customer side comes in, they said, 'Coming in' before opening the door, so they didn't hit anyone, but of course customers didn't know that."
"So when this dude opened the door and hit a waitress carrying a ton of drinks, we were reasonably upset with him."
"He said, ;You should really put a sign up'."
"We showed him all the signs, and he goes, 'That seems a bit excessive'."- GreyFoxHound1
So Wrong.
"Had an employee sign an NDA about an upcoming art installation that had investors."
"He told everyone."
"He argued with me the NDA only meant he couldn’t disclose anything with the people in the company."- BosskHogg
He Knew What He Was Talking About
This was best said:
“'Never wrestle with pigs'."
"'You both get dirty and the pig likes it'.― George Bernard Shaw"- Zerowantuthri·
pigs GIFGiphySome Outdated Inventions Are Definitely Not Missed...
"I’m showing my age here but I used to work for an estate agency, and we had sales offices set up at the site of large new housing developments."
"Our primary method of communication was fax."
"One of the sales associates telephoned our office to say that the fax machine had run out of paper."
"No problem, I said, one of the guys is coming your way later for a house tour, I’ll give him a box of paper to give to you."
"We then had an almost 20 minute long argument when they kept insisting 'NO, YOU JUST SEND ME A BLANK FAX BECAUSE I NEED THE PAPER, IT WILL JUST COME OUT OF MY FAX MACHINE'.”
"It was like trying to nail jelly to a tree."
"Difficult, irritating, and it achieved nothing."- BettieKat
Very Few Hills Are Worth Dying On...
"I had a friend in university who was a world-class high school debater."
"Over meals, she liked to pick a ridiculous proposition and then talk circles around people until they had to concede to her point, no matter how absurd."
"When she tried it with me, I just stonewalled her."
"Met every point with a solid 'I don't think that's true'." or 'That doesn't make sense'."
"Eventually she gave up and never tried it with me again."
"It was the only time I've ever used the tactics of the stupid to win an argument."
"But, to be fair, if you're not arguing with me in good faith, I feel no obligation to respond in good faith."- kitskill
IS The Customer Always Right?...
"Working retail."
"Especially when I worked in the tech shop or a computer store."
" Trying to convince someone their $500 laptop is never going to be a gaming system no matter how many of the very few replaceable parts we throw at it can be exhausting."- MOS95B
happy episode 7 GIFGiphyEducation Only Matters If You Learned Something....
"Was arguing with this dude about something math-related."
"He didn’t know how to read a study that involved statistics. claimed he was in multiple AP math classes."
"Tried saying that I 'probably don’t even know basic integration'."
"Gave me a common integration problem."
"He wrote it but forgot the minus sign, making it unsolvable."
"I pointed it out and he edited the comment to make it correct."
"Told him that some people can see when you edit comments."
"He claimed that he just capitalized a letter. on and on and on."- SaturdayNightCity
Good Legal Counsel Might Be Worth The Splurge...
"I asked a representative from the Friend of the Court to explain something she said and she told me that I understood what she was saying."
"I replied that I wouldn't have asked her to explain if I had understood."
"She said if I was going to be difficult, she would hold me in contempt."
"My X chimed in that she didn't quite understand what she had said and was greeted with a smile and an explanation."
"From that point on I always disagreed with the Friend of the Court on EVERYTHING, so that I could be seen by the 'Actual Court' and a Judge."- PURPLEPEE
Season 4 Episode 21 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphySore Winners Are No More Attractive Than Sore Losers...
"Once worked with a guy who, by his own admission, got his rocks off by picking fights."
"He'd start an argument over the smallest thing."
"If you said it was white, he'd say it was black, just to try to start something."
"The one that always stood out for me was the weather app competition."
"One day he asked me what temperature it was, so I read it off my weather app."
"He got all offended, because his weather app said it was a couple degrees warmer."
"So he decides we're going to have a weather app competition."
"He was going to chart what our apps said the temperature was, and at the end of the week, whichever one was closest to that day's high would be the winner."
"And the loser would have to start using the winner's app."
"To which I said, "What is your f*cking problem?'"
"So, yeah."
"For the first few days, he'd make a big performance about marching into my office, recording the temperature off my app, jotting down some notes, and walking off."
"This started on a Monday."
"He gave up after Wednesday."
"Either because I was winning, or he was disappointed because, despite his best efforts, I just did not give a f*ck about weather apps."
"Or maybe the boss told him to stop because I filed a complaint that this was bordering on harassment."- originalchaosinabox
Im Always Right GIF by ZionGiphyIt should perhaps be said calling someone an idiot, or even thinking it, is not a particularly nice thing to do.
Even so, if you're tempted to do so when you're in the presence of a particular individual, probably best not to provoke them.
After all, if you're so determined to "win," does it really make you any better than them?