It seems like a trope of solely fiction that one of the wedding party would be left alone at the altar, jilted and scorned by their lover.
But all fiction is based in truth. So it must have happened at some point in history. And Reddit seems to exist to reassure us that these things happen way more often than we were lead to believe it does.
Some people really have been left at the altar.
Redditor randvoo12 asked:
Did you ever attend a wedding where the bride or groom was left at the altar? or Did it happen to you or someone you know? What happened and How did it affect the abandoned?
Here were some of those stories.
Everybody BUT The Bride And Groom
Giphy"Does it count if the wedding party was left at the altar?"
"I didn't know the full story of this one until afterwards, I was merely attending due to family obligation, being a teenager at the time. I already knew something up when my Mom grumpily told me we had to go to a wedding and that it was in two weeks. My Mom is the consummate scheduler - there's no way she wouldn't have told me about a wedding months in advance unless it was also a surprise to her."
"It's a Wednesday evening after school mind you, and the ambiance is just weird. No one is talking, no one is happy. The bridesmaids and groomsmen are all in nice-looking but clearly unmatched dresses and suits and looking around nervously. I don't know anyone, but my Mom worked with this girl for a few years and said something about showing up to support 'the bride and no one else.' I didn't really get this at the time, being 12-13. The only thing that really seems off to me is how young everyone in the wedding party looks, like, Vincent Adultman young. I go in with Mom, we sit on the bride's side. And wait."
"And wait."
"And wait."
"This is before cell phones were popular, so everyone is just kinda murmuring, until finally someone runs in with a letter addressed to the both sets of parents of the bride and groom. I can't see much but I heard the opening of the envelopes followed by one of the Dad's yelling out 'god DAMN it,' making the pastor/father/preacher of whatever run down c-team off-brand Christian church we were in go bright red. The dad proceeded to tell everyone the wedding was 'off' and to 'go home.'"
"Found out from Mom much later that the Bride and Groom were being forced to get married after the parents caught them having sex. Now, it's already ridiculous to do this in any situation, but there wasn't even a pregnancy involved, both of these people were 19, and it was the 90's. The bridesmaids were all pulled from bride's sisters/female cousins, and groomsmen were groom's brothers/male cousins. No friends, nothing, just forced matrimony straight up."
"Apparently the letter said the effects of "Dear Mom and Dad, screw you from the children you'll never see ever again."
"They ran off to a different state together to start over. Last I heard they're in their early 40's now, and actually married with kids, and still haven't spoken to their parents since that day."
- DigitalPriest
No One To Tell Her Story
"My great great aunt (before I was born, obviously) was stood up at the altar."
"We found out when my mother asked her grandmother to help her make a family tree. So great grandma started listing all of her 12 brothers and sisters, but accidentally named a 13th sister, then gasped, then made my mother swear she'd never tell anyone else in the family."
"She was stood up at the altar, and soon after committed suicide. Since the family was extremely religious, she wasn't allowed to be buried in the church cemetery, and her name was erased from the family bible. Her memory was wiped from the face of the earth."
KithAndAkin
Can't Fix A Broken Jerk
"In high school one of my friends, Sheri, got pregnant. It was a sort of shotgun wedding. Her parents found out that she was pregnant because they didn't care about privacy or personal space. I actually found out from my mom when i got home from school one day because Sheri's mom told my mom at the grocery store."
"Well, Sheri's parents were Christian and insisted that they get married. So the day of the wedding comes, she's about to walk down the aisle with her dad when the grooms cousin that was also our age comes up and says "Sheri, i gotta say something really important. Can i borrow you for a moment." Of course her dad is angry at the rudeness here, but Sheri goes to talk to him anyway. It turned out that the groom was supposed to be wearing a condom, but took it off at the last second without telling her."
"He had done this with another girl too, and then both times bragged about it to his friends. Sheri believed it 100%, and given the guys character, it's not surprising. She didn't go back to her dad to walk down the aisle, she just got in her car and left... 20 or so minutes later she called the church and had them put her mom on the phone and told her what happened and that there was no way she would marry him even if it means her parents kick her out of their house."
- lovablelikeadraugr
The Awkwardness
"Officiant here. Definitely have had this happen. It is usually pretty awful, and confusing. And it is, in most situations, (except of course same-sex couples) the groom. I've only ever seen the bride skip out on tv."
"The party usually waits 10-15 minutes after the designated start time. Then there's an awkward moment, and usually someone gets a call or text, or is sent to deliver the bad news. This generally results in tears, and statements of, "I knew it!" Some folks shuffle the bride off, and then usually Dad or senior member of the family makes an awkward statement."
"If there was a reception with a meal planned, folks are either invited to stay and eat or the food is sent to a shelter."
"And that's really about it."
- User Deleted
Emotional Distress
"My husband and I weren't actually at this wedding (for mutual acquaintances), but a lot of our other friends knew the couple better and had been invited. Coincidentally, we were getting together that evening with some of the friends who were going to the wedding, and that's who we heard the first-hand account from."
"Bride and groom stood up in front of the priest to say vows, and groom hesitated. After an awkward pause, he turned away from the bride he'd been facing, said in a low voice, "I just can't do this. I'm sorry." The best man took him by the arm and led him out. The bride was too stunned to say anything, but then her bridesmaids led her away."
"There were some kind of meetings in the back of the church and in the bride's room, and the priest came back and announced that the wedding was being canceled. The bride's father tore a program in half and announced angrily that anyone who wanted to partake of the reception was welcome to, since it was paid for."
"Strangely, although the couple never did get married, they actually remained friends. How the bride did it, I'll never know. A little more than a year later, the former groom died of a genetic heart condition while traveling overseas. A couple years after that, the former bride went to a sperm bank and had a child and has raised her as a single parent."
- MinimalistFan
Not For His Own Sake
"A distant cousin of mine had a panic attack."
"As the bride was approaching I could see his eyes bulging, he was sweating profusely, and when the priest started speaking he begun to shake violently, holding his head down, and then he just walked out. The ceremony did not resume."
"He had a history of panic attacks, and it was so sad to watch. He confessed later on (after the divorce 3 months later) that he was just getting married to make his parents happy, and he wasn't sure at all that that's what he wanted"
hateful_liam
Crazy Person
"Actually the best. My ex, about 10 years ago. We split, she was fiery. She went to Montreal on a work trip, came back with a fiancee. Him and I grew close, a lot of similarities, and straight up, I was done with her and he was great. Drinking buddy, weed buddy. If see her half often, but never too long."
"The wedding rolls around, and I knew inside that she was going to bail. I gave him warning. He legit took the mic and invited everyone to get drunk."
"I'm happy to say he met a lady at his own wedding that night. Krista kind of lost her mind when she found out he was good."
"She messaged him for a year looking for alimony type payments, but he's a lawyer(now, school then). So no."
- ihate_your_face
Not Undeserved
"Happened to a guy at a company I worked at about 9 years ago. He and his fiance went up to the altar and she had requested a projector to show some of their times together, pictures, etc. He went along with it, only for her to have organised a video of him cheating on her to play instead. Full nudity. She walked away from the altar, refunded his portion of the honeymoon, and went by herself."
"Honestly, from what I heard, it was brutal on the guy. The women he cheated on her with was in the audience, too, and was part of the company as his manager. They were both made to resign, as office romances between a manager and their subordinates were not allowed unless the promotion happened while they were seeing each other."
JimmyL2014
The Worst Luck
"From what I know, my great-uncle, so my maternal grandfather's brother, left his designated bride at the altar. The great-uncle, let's call him George, served in WW2 and lived a lavish bachelor style life, were talking high society parties, expensive trips, even a minor scandal or two involved with some married women... It was around 1964, and he was my grandfather's older brother. Great-grandfather was concerned who will run the estate after he's gone, so he decided to take matters in his own hands and find him a wife."
"My great-grandmother and her sister were tasked and they found a suitable girl from the right family, let's call her Emma. So Emma and George were introduced at a garden party and my great-grandpa basically told him he's marrying Emma and George was super pissed."
"The wedding day came, my grandpa was an usher (this means he escorted his mother and his youngest sister in the church) and he saw everyone looking pristine and perfect, but the groom wasn't anywhere to be seen. George came piss drunk and couldn't stand. When Emma came, he puked right at the priest's feet and left the church, passing right by Emma. He got into his car and that was the last time my grandfather saw him, because he crashed into a tree drunk. Emma later married someone and lived a happy normal life, from what I've heard she wasn't even shaken by George's death."
"Grandpa, on the other hand, is still mourning his brother, 50+ years later. Everything fell on him and whenever he retells what happened to George, he tears up."
-DrunkWonderWoman
Ruined By Greed
Giphy"I did not experience this one but read it in a newspaper. In India, there's a custom in some states called the dowry system. Bride's father gives cash and expensive gifts to the groom and his parents for marrying his daughter. It started off as voluntary gifts but now people force the brides' side to pay up money. I know. I have four sister-in-laws wed this way. In the society, rebelling against parents or customs is akin to committing social and financial suicide. Still, a courageous girl refused to marry because the groom's father was being too greedy and was asking for more than what her father could afford. When I read it, I cried. I had seen so many families ruined because of this custom."
- Mybaresoul
Chaos...
"This kind of counts? My GF went to her brothers friends wedding. GF's brother's wife (wow that's a mouthful) gave the groom and groomsmen alcohol BEFORE the wedding for gifts... yup they drank it all. Now we have a bunch of drunk grown men up on the altar with the groom about to get married when the groom's parents (divorced, not civil either) start fighting."
"Chaos erupts as they start fighting, their dates start fighting and the rest of the family start fighting. Perplexed pastor looks upon the fight as the cops show up and one of the groomsmen says 'Egh, it's ok, this happens all the time.' Pastor refused to marry them and the wedding was called off. They got married later on but I don't know how they fared."
WS6Legacy
Big Problems
"So my brother was sort of left at the alter. They had gotten pregnant while in their senior year of high school. My brother wanted to do the right thing, so he asked her to marry him. The night before the wedding, she told him she didn't want to go through with it anymore. Sometime during the next six months she got involved with another older man, and married him. Her mother died and she had the baby pretty quickly after that."
"Then she asked my brother to give up parental rights to the baby so that her new husband could adopt him. The bottom line is it messed with my brother a lot. He's never really had a good relationship since. Never had one that lasted a long time. He spent a lot of time regretting giving up rights to the kid. Made a lot of bad choices including drug use, stealing cars, and alcoholism."
"It's been a long twenty years since all that happened. In the last year he did get involved with someone. Asked her and her daughter to move in with him, and then six months into it she said she was going to marry her child's father. And so she left him and took his savings with her. He had another sort of downward spiral after that."
"But he did get into rehab, he has been sober for several months now, and he is living with his mom for now. But he got a new job, and he seems to be a lot happier than I have seen him in ages. I am hoping this time things work out for him."
Evelyn_Black
Sorry Jezebel
Bette Davis Jezebel GIF by Turner Classic MoviesGiphy"I saw a close friend of mine's dad get left at the altar. It was so disturbing because the father turned out to be having an affair with the brides sister who at the time was 6-months pregnant with the fathers kid. I personally wanted to punch the douche in his face. F**k you Steven, and I am so, so sorry for you Jezebel."
ascension111
On the Way
"Buddy was getting married and was killed by a drunk driver on the way to the church."
butterfaceloser
"This happened to a friend of mine. I feel super bad for her, that’s something you can never get over."
TheMoonMaster
"Hey Mom, whose Eddie?"
"I was rummaging in a cabinet at my grandparents home when I was about 12 years old and found a stack of napkins. They were embossed in gold with the names of my mom and a man, a date, and wedding bells. So of course I bust right out with 'Hey Mom, whose Eddie?' The look that came over her face kind of said it all. She told me the whole sad story right then and there."
"She'd been left, not at the alter, but a few days before. I was horrified for her, but also immediately comprehended that I probably wouldn't exist had he not done this, and that sometimes bad things happen for a reason. I've never mentioned it to her or anyone again until now. I have wondered why the damn napkins were kept."
writersfolly
Hurry Up
"I was once at a wedding where the groom was almost late to the altar and the groomsman were late. In Serbian tradition, the groom's family and friends meet at the home of the groom's parents for a pre-wedding party. In this case, the house was about 30 miles from the church. For those in the Chicago area, the house was in Palos Heights and the church in Gurnee."
"The groom left barely in time to get there. I left shortly afterwards. The groomsman left later but I saw them on I294 going about 120mph to get to the church on time. Groom chewed them out afterwards since he told them to leave when he did."
teufelinderflasche
Taking the Hit
"Never actually got to the wedding. About a month out the groom pulled out and ended things. Too late to get any deposits back, so they basically just canceled everything and took the hit. They didn’t cancel the honeymoon though; bride and her maid of honour went on the round-the-world trip instead. The groom in question basically skipped town and is now persona non grata amongst her family and their friends."
"I had a high opinion of the guy before that but honestly don’t know what I’d say to him if he came back now. I mean, at least he didn’t leave her at the altar, but I feel like this is worse? At least when you leave someone at the altar it saves you the trouble of explaining what happened to your guests."
BrainstormsBriefcase
The Drop Off
Dinner Party Dancing GIFGiphy"Not bride or groom but my BIL's family didn't show up until after the ceremony to drop off their share of the potluck, mingle for a bit and eat before taking off. I don't think they approved of the fact that it was a small, non traditional wedding held at a friend's house. Plus my sister is white."
221CBakerStreet
Oh well...
"I went to one, and both did not show up. We waited for an hour. Then they sent us to the hotel for food, some people took the gifts back."
Talk about unhappily ever after.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.