'Holding The Door For Me'—And Other 'Kind' Gestures That Piss People Off
It's natural to want to be kind or helpful to others. Sometimes these kind gestures can just turn out to be a huge inconvenience to everyone involved though.
Reddit user u/HighImShadow wanted some examples of these irritating gestures, so they asked:
There's A System For A Reason
Yielding in traffic when you have the right of way.
This JUST happened to me 5 minutes ago. I was waiting at a crosswalk to cross the street. The traffic light was green and my signal to cross was red. This idiot remains stopped at the green light and waves me on to cross the street. I was like, "no. just go! it's green for you!" he just kept waving me on until a person finally pulled up behind him and honked. He shook his head and acted all annoyed that I wouldn't appreciate his kind gesture and cross the street. I'm not going to risk getting smashed into the pavement by someone coming the other direction because I failed to stop at a crosswalk! Just go!
Some People Like Being Alone
When people feel compelled to eat with me if I'm eating alone. Where did this notion come from that it's sad to eat alone? I like it, it's peaceful.
Same, I would eat lunch every day alone with a book, and people would feel compelled to sit down and start talking to me. Drove me nuts. Like do you think I brought this book because I don't want to read it? Go away!
I learned at my first job to leave the building at lunch, even if it's to eat in your car or something because otherwise you will be disturbed and usually about work.
"Eddy, you have a call on line one."
"I have a hoagie in hand one!"
This is apparently not the correct response from the glares I got from managerial types.
It's Not A Competition
When you've just gone through a rough time and people try consoling/one-upping you by telling their hardship story.
Let me wallow in my own misery please.
Same with injuries and illness. My mother would ALWAYS try to one up me if I got hurt. It's not a competition I don't want to have WORSE pain, hell I don't want any pain. Also everyone has a different tolerance level.
Breaking the order of how things should move in order to give someone the ability to go first. Now you are just confusing people and wasting time.
My college campus had one area that was super busy with both foot traffic and bicycles and I saw several people get hit by bikes because they were trying to be polite, when really they just needed to be predictable.
Good god, so much this. You're holding the door for me, but also standing in my way. I could have already been through the door if you hadn't done this. People who stop hundreds of people in line behind them in order to let one inconsiderate asshole cut the line in traffic. You're not kind. You're a dope.
If I Say I Don't Need Help, I Don't Need Help
So I walk with a cane and I can't lift much, however when I'm insisting that I CAN do a particularly small thing it really upsets me when people insist on doing it for me anyway. It makes me feel weaker and embarrassed. Seriously, offer people with handicaps help, of course please do that, but if they are insisting that they are fine then please let them do that thing they are capable of; for me it makes me feel just a little bit more empowered.
Also thank you for your kindness, I don't mean to diminish it or seem ungrateful.
I once read somewhere that a good analogy is helping someone put on a jacket: if you see a random person putting on a jacket, it would be super weird to offer them help (or worse, just start putting it on for them). However if you see someone that's having trouble getting their arms through, or has the jacket all twisted up, offering to help them is a polite thing to do, although you probably wouldn't insist.
I don't have a disability, so I can't speak to what it's like being on the other side of that, but it's worked for me in the past :)
I'm sorry that people do that, I always think about how frustrating it must be when people treat you in a patronizing way under the guise of being "nice".
The not insisting part is what makes this a good analogy. Offering help is fine. Taking the jacket and making them accept help is not. You keep doing what you're doing 👍🏻
Don't Buy Pets As Gifts!
People being given pets as a surprise gift for Christmas or a birthday. I'm sure many of them will have a good home nonetheless, but some of them will end up in situations that are not fully thought-out with people who may not be up to the task of being a responsible pet owner because they either never had a say in it or view pets as toys.
Pets as gifts should be a non-starter in all situations. My mother bought me an adorable puppy at a time when I was not ready for it (apartment in the city, worked more than 40 hours a week). Fortunately, she now lives with my parents and the entire family loves her.
It really sucked because I am still attached to her and the realization came that I couldn't keep her was very sad for me.
Fortunately, she is in a good home and I get to see her, but there are countless other pets that aren't so lucky. Every person I have known to work for either a shelter or a dog rescue says the season after Christmas is horrifically sad with all the gifted pets they receive.
TLDR: For the love of god, do not buy pets as gifts!
It's Easier To Just Open The Door Myself
Holding the door for me but from the inside of the doorframe so I have to like... scoot by them butt-to-crotch style
Some people insist I try anyway. I say, "I don't want to run over your feet!" They think either I'm joking or I don't know the dimensions of my chair, so they say, "It's ok!" At this point I've stopped caring so I just run over their feet. I hope it hurts.
Additionally holding the door in general if I'm still quite far away. Either I've gotta now run to the door so I don't make you wait for me or I end up making you wait. Just let the door close if I'm not 2-3 steps away from it, I can open it all by myself. My mommy even says I'm a big boy now.
Information Is Important
Not telling me something to protect me. Drives me crazy.
Yeah, I mean...I get it. I do. But finding out later feels way worse than just knowing right away. Like, I came back from a trip and was told my cousin had died from cancer no one knew he had. He may have had cancer, I don't know. But the reality was that he killed himself and finding out way after the fact was way worse.
I Just Don't Have Anything To Say
When you're the quiet one in a group and somebody points out in front of everyone.
Them: "He speaks! Wow!"
F*ck off, ass.
Don't Touch People
Kinda specific to people like me but do not touch my freaking wheelchair unless I specifically and verbally ask you to.
F*ck off man.
And it's so weirdly dehumanizing too. Like "You look like you're struggling, so I'm gonna move you to where I think you need to go because I know better than the person in the actual wheelchair!"
"Would you like some/a "insert random food or drink"", no I am good but thank you. No here take it. No I really don't want it. Come on just take it.
If I don't want any don't force me, it isn't a nice gesture once you start hounding me about it.
"You want some extra (insert irremovable condiment here)?"
"No thanks, I'm good"
"Yes I'm sure"
"Ahh just have it anyway" then proceeds to pour it all over my food
He would do this with stuff like gravy so I cant pick up the gravy and take it off. One day after he did it I just put the plate down and walked away. He never did it again lol.
I've Got It
When people try to be helpful by grabbing heavy items I'm carrying out of my arms without asking me first. I appreciate the sentiment, but it throws off the balance of all the other heavy objects in my arms.
This. I work in a fairly physical job and I'm a 5'1" woman. I'm a rock climber, and I'm stronger than I look. Not only does it mess me up more than help when people try to grab stuff from me, it's also vaguely insulting that they think I'm struggling. Happens at least five times a day though.
It's Actually Slower Now
When someone is walking behind me & they push the button to make the automatic door open right as I'm trying to go through it. Thanks, now I have to wait while this slow-ass door opens when I could've just quickly opened it myself.
Always Choose GPS
When passengers offer to give directions and basically force others to not use the GPS, and then they don't even give the directions properly (like they get distracted and then tell others at the last possible second to dive bomb a turn because they were in the wrong lane to begin with).
"Ill let you know when we get close."
No, youll let me know now, or so help me Ill get GPS involved.
The Cycle Of Gifts
Receiving birthday or Christmas gift from loose acquaintance, thus creating cycle of guilt or undesired effort.
I'm the loose acquaintance. You don't have to return the favor- I promise. I just did it because I'm bored and depressed and seeing your face light up at the surprise makes my day. That's the only reason I do it
I Don't Want Them Either
People saying "these are about your size aren't they?" and giving me a big bag of clothes, like yeah, thanks mum but nothing is my style and now I'm stuck with a big bag of stuff you should've taken to the charity shop.
I've actually had the situation of making myself wear one of my mums tops to a family event because I thought she'd be happy and have her text me afterwards suggesting I dressed a little less frumpy 😂
Just Leave Me Be
Trying to make me do "fun" things I don't want to do. No, I'm not desperate for someone to drag me out of my shell, I just f*cking hate karaoke.
"Reddit user GifGuyRob asked: 'What is the weirdest thing you have seen that you can’t really explain?'
Every now and again, we might experience something that makes us stop dead in our tracks or gives us the shivers.
More often than not, there is a logical explanation for what happened, often resulting in our laughing about it down the line.
An electrical power surge caused the lights to flicker, that haunting noise we heard was just a nearby car radio, or that unexplained cold blast of air was simply owing to our standing too close to the air conditioning vent.
But sometimes, we experience something we simply cannot explain, and still lie awake at night trying to figure it out.
Redditor GifGuyRob was curious to hear people's mystifying experiences to which they still can't offer an explanation, leading them to ask:
"What is the weirdest thing you have seen that you can’t really explain?"
Card Tricks... Without The Cards.
"I was hanging out on the sidewalk in front of a drugstore when some dude walked by, stopped, looked at me, and asked me to think of a card, any card."
"Then he said 'you’re picturing the five of clubs!'"
"I was amazed."
"That’s the card I was thinking of."
”'Holy sh*t, that’s right!' I said."
"The dude just winked and walked away."
"That’s the best magic trick I’ve ever seen, and it was some rando on the street that I never saw again."
"I have no clue how he did it, other than some form of subliminal planting of the image in my mind, but that’s unreliable."
"It was a card trick that involved no cards at all."
"That was the most inexplicable thing I’ve ever seen."- I_Framed_OJ
"In a hospital, the nicer the patient, the worse the prognosis."
"If they work charities and are really polite, definitely aggressive cancer."
"If they are rude a**holes, they will live long no matter how sick they are."- KoorsboomThe Knocks Hospital GIF by feierSunGiphy
"I once saw a clipboard fly off of the hook it hung on and land around 3 feet away."
"The room was totally still beforehand, no breeze or earthquake or anything."
"Just hanging up where it always was, then flung across the room for no reason at all."
"Most boring poltergeist ever."- Reiseoftheginger
"I was living in my last apartment back in the 90s."
"I walked down the hall, turned to go to the bathroom, and got hit in the back with a penny."
"Nobody else was in the apartment."- kmsc84
"Family was on holiday at a resort in Vietnam."
"My sister and I took an elevator in the hotel and it stopped and opened up on the top floor, where nothing was built."
"Just bricks laying about, a wheelbarrow, no fence or wall around the edge of the building, and there was a single small tree growing out of the ground in front of the elevator doors a few feet out."
"There was also this impenetrable fog that was floating around, obscuring the sight of what would be the rest of the resort below and it was quite windy."
"We both agreed it was weird and looked dangerous to be up here - we clearly weren't meant to have access to the top floor since it wasn't fully constructed."
"We went back down to the ground floor and noticed that it was actually a sunny and clear day all round."
"We wondered where that fog and wind went to."
"So we decided to go back to the unfinished rooftop level to check again, but when we did it was perfectly fine and fully built."
"We couldn't explain it and couldn't find that half-built top floor again afterwards."- lifesnotperfectGoing Up 13Th Floor GIF by Taylor SwiftGiphy
"My friends and I flashed a powerful light across a river and saw what appeared to be an absolutely massive boar."
"It then stood up on its hind legs and it simply did not compute."
"Immediate fear everyone ran."
"I was a kid but I have a very good memory and several friends that are positive they saw it as well."
"I went from driving on one highway to another highway in pouring rain."
"Still headed in the right direction, and about 10 miles in total displacement."
"But I consciously chose one and was on it until I saw road signs telling me I was one the other."
"I just went numb."
"No loss of time or any other abnormality."
"If I didn’t have to actually make a distinct effort to choose the route I wanted, I can see how it might have been a simple mistake."
"But I was on the road I chose (geography etc) until I wasn’t."
"Like something picked me up and put me down instantaneously and I didn’t notice until how long?"- Stayvein
Creature Of The Night
"Actually, one that was recently solved thanks to the internet!"
"We used to have parakeets in an outside aviary."
"One night I was woken up by the budgies screaming and there was... some odd animal attacking it."
"It had a pointed, cone shaped head, no visible ears and a long tail that was not foxlike."
"But it wasn't a possum."
"It was thin and moved like a cat -- it jumped and moved lithely."
"I tapped on the sliding glass door and it stopped, cocked its head, and came over to look at me."
"We were looking eye-to-eye and for the life of me I still couldn't figure out a face."
"Now I was really into nature in my area, really into reading books and sh*t because I wanted to be a forest ranger, and I still couldn't identify this animal."
"Everyone who I told said it was a bad dream but it was real."
"Anyway, years later it was still the weirdest thing that happened to me."
"The internet had come along and I finally had my answer: I saw a Fisher!"
"It's a super rare animal in my area -- like 500 left, max."
"Kind of like a weasel, but heavier."
"They do have ears, btw."
"I assume it was hidden by fur."- Z0ooool
Cabin In The Woods
"When I was about 13 or 14 years old myself and two friends found a house in the middle of the woods that just didn't make sense."
"We were all neighbors, and along all three of our houses was a very large wooded area."
"It runs a few miles back and becomes a state forest."
"We had run around these woods plenty of times and even had areas we'd recognize as we went."
"This particular day we followed this ravine that was sometimes a stream, but was dry at this time."
"That part is important, because we followed that same ravine several times after that and never could find the house again."
"When I say the house didn't make sense, I mean it. It was a white trailer."
"I'd say a double-wide."
"There was white underpinning along the bottom."
"It was a poor country area, so that's not uncommon."
"But it was unusually clean."
"Like, brand new, perfectly white."
"But that's still not the weird part."
"It didn't have doors."
"Or a driveway."
"We were in the middle of the woods."
"The entire walk through the woods is full of bushes, thorns, spiderwebs, bugs, vines, logs."
"But this was a clearing of flat grass like someone mowed this area."
"We weren't afraid or anything while we were there."
"There really wasn't anything remarkable about it, and that's honestly what makes it so weird to think about to this day."
"We just walked around it for a bit, said it was kinda weird, and we went back on our adventure."
"Eventually we all just went home."
"I'm still friends with both of the other kids."
"We're in our 30s and I'm even going to a wedding for one of them this weekend."
"We've talked about it since, and the story still just doesn't add up."
"My parents still live in that house, and we spent years after that day exploring the woods all the time."
"Never found it again."- LemonbeeeeHorror Home GIF by Knock At The CabinGiphy
Sometimes our eyes might be playing tricks on us.
Other times, we know for certain what we're seeing is real, but simply can't explain what we're seeing.
Either way, there is little more disconcerting in this world than uncertainty.
Who hasn't, at one time or another, dreamed about hitting the lottery big time?
When you do lotto research (as I frequently have), you learn the best thing for you is anonymity.
Hiding your fortune is one of the best ways to stay alive!
That's not a dramatic statement.
There are horror stories surrounding lotto winners.
Money changes everything, so keep your secrets.
Redditor divorced_dad_670 wanted to hear about how creative people would get to make sure nobody knew they were super rich, so they asked:
"Powerball is currently at 1.4b, if you won, what is your cover story as to why you’ve suddenly gained so much wealth?"
I have thought long and hard about how I'm going to win the lottery and how I will hide it.
I'm clearly not alone as may Redditors have their own plans.
Out WestFarm Workers Food GIF by Denyse®Giphy
"No cover story. I'd tell no one. Then I'd move to a ranch in the middle of nowhere in the Pacific Northwest, and spend the rest of my days riding dirt bikes and gardening."
"Keep working for a week or two. Get more and more angry. Get in a fight with someone and get fired, never to be heard from again. No one will miss me."
"I would totally miss you, dude. I feel like we are kindred spirits, you and I. And I would never let a kindred spirit miss out on a prime business opportunity like the one I am about to tell you."
"Bro, for 10k, I'll start the fight with you, and you can leave because of a hostile work environment. Then in 6 months when you blow it all, you can come back to work and I'll apologize."
"If people have realized I've gained obscene wealth, I've failed already."
"The only way to really tell is if you go straight Hollywood baller route. I remember 50 Cent saying you don't want a house that big. If you think s**t I don't want to walk all the way down there it's too big."
"This. I would absolutely not tell anyone, keep working, pay off my house and car (and not tell anyone), (secretly) invest, and keep my mouth shut."
"Bought Bitcoin early. Forgot password. Remembered password."
"This sort of happened to me. I got tipped $1 in Bitcoin years ago because of some stupid comment here on Reddit. I forgot about it for years until Bitcoin was actually worth something. Sold that little bit for ~$300! Most forgettable comment I’ve ever made on here, but the most profitable!"
"I won the Powerball. I'm disconnecting my number. You won't be able to reach me. If I want to reach you, I'll send a helicopter. Lol, get screwed, nerds."
"Vanishes in a cloud of smoke which cost me $230,000 to have set up!"
A big, splashy peace out "I QUIT" MOMENT can be a lot of fun.
Fools...Diva Hello GIF by WHOLLY GUACAMOLEGiphy
"I'd tell people I stopped buying avocado toast based on a story on the news - next thing I knew it I had a ton of extra cash."
Making a Family
"I’d immediately start some bogus MLM, and begin soliciting anyone who asked about my money. I know I haven’t seen you since high school, but I’d like to talk to you about an exciting business opportunity. We’re more of a family than a team, really. If you’re a go-getter, you’re exactly who we’re looking for. #Bossbabe #MyownCEO #IDidYouCanToo."
"This is actually genius. People will think you're swimming in debt to sell the idea, when in fact, you're swimming in cash 😂."
"I would say I sold all my crypto. Those who say they didn't know I was in crypto I would say yeah I didn't want to talk about it because too many crypto bros out there ruined talking about it. Florida releases the names of winners 90 days after they claim it. So the lie is not going to work for long. I would have isolated myself by then so it's not like I will need to worry about people showing up where I live and work asking for money."
"Apparently a corporation, trust, non-profit, partnership, or estate can claim lottery winnings in Florida. I was told many years ago that you had to claim it yourself. That's great to know I don't have to claim it myself. I'm still concerned it would get out that I won. That would be a nice worry to have compared to worries I am dealing with."
"When a colleague who ran our work lottery syndicate decided it was our turn to win, he said we should figure out how we were going to quit."
"His plan was supposedly to blow the south wall off the open plan office all the programmers use, hire a helicopter with some sort of harness arrangement, and the London symphony orchestra to play him away from the car park with Ode to Joy as he disappeared backward on his harness over the city under the helicopter with two fingers up at the building the whole time. I wish he’d won, he was just crazy enough to have possibly done it."
"I will ask everyone I know if I can borrow money. Every single person will be asked for an amount that will be enough that they don't say yes instantly but not so large they can't afford it. If I barely know you maybe I ask to borrow $40. If you're my parents I ask for $10k. I write down every single person's response. When I am later asked for anything I will reply with that exact answer."
Simple Planssigning season 3 GIFGiphy
"No cover story. You call an accountant, a lawyer, and a financial advisor. You move states and claim the ticket after you have moved."
Money is fantastic but it can be dangerous.
Do you have any fantasies about winning the lotto? Let us know in the comment below.
When someone dies young, people often lament they're "gone too soon."
Death comes for us all eventually, but sometimes it's especially shocking when a person on the cusp of greatness dies—often tragically.
Reddit user rigorousthinker asked:
"Which person who died too early in life had the most potential?"
"Henry Mosely, a British physicist."
"One of the greatest physicists of the 20th century. Developed Moseley's Law that helped to define the atomic number."
"The reason why nobody has heard of him is because he [was killed by] sniper at Gallipoli when he was 27 years old."
"Isaac Asimov wrote about him: 'in view of what [Moseley] might still have accomplished ... his death might well have been the most costly single death of the War to mankind generally'."
"He's the reason why countries keep their scientists and researchers from being drafted or allowed to fight anymore."
"I'd forward Évariste Galois."
"At the cutting edge of mathematics, as a teenager solved a centuries standing open problem, and created a field of mathematics which was so complex at the time that Galois' contemporaries were stymied and overlooked it's value."
"He was killed in a duel at the age of 20."
"I'm going historical. Prince Arthur Tudor. He died aged 15, leaving his younger brother Henry to become Henry VIII of England."
"Arthur was apparently more of a scholar than anything else, compared to his brother who was more into the idea of being a warrior king."
"Had Arthur survived and gone on to become King, then global history would have taken a very different turn."
"Many of those priceless manuscripts existed nowhere outside of England because they were written in English. Back in the ninth century, the West Saxon king Alfred the Great had established an educational system where children learned to write their native language first before learning Latin."
"The Anglo-Saxon Chronicle is in English because of that. Beowulf was written down in English because of that. The Old English they spoke then is practically indecipherable now except to scholars, yet English is still the best documented secular language of the early Middle Ages."
"Only a tiny sliver of that literature survives. Mostly because Henry VIII had the rest of it burned."
"While he wasn't terribly young, I'd say his true potential life was cut in half. Imagine what music will never be or where it could have gone had he lived a longer life."
"35 IS terribly young. And throw Franz Schubert in this thread as well. Died at 31 and was writing some of the greatest music ever produced."
"Just for the final 2 movements of the Unfinished Symphony alone! Supposedly on his deathbed he said 'I have so much still to say'."
"And Chopin, too. Died age 39, was writing the greatest piano works ever."
"Shout out to my boy Felix Mendelssohn, died at the age of 38. Wrote 4 amazing symphonies, the famous music for A Midsummer Night's Dream, and the greatest violin concerto in the repertoire."
"I'd give anything to see what he would have done with another 38 years."
"Based on his energy, the fact that after a short career with an amazing voice, he came back from surgery with a better one, recorded one of the great songs of the 20th century, and then immediately died."
"Otis is interesting to me. He died right before he was going to crossover to white audiences."
"What would Dock of the Bay sound like if he got to finish it and realize his vision (he had kind of a Pet Sounds vision for the full album)?"
"If he didn’t die, would soul have lost so much ground to funk in the 1970s?"
"And would Stax Records still be around and thriving, instead of closing in the mid-1970s?"
"All interesting questions."
"Alan Turing—died for the worst f*cking reason and what happened to him was a travesty."
"Turing was prosecuted in 1952 for homosexual acts. He accepted hormone treatment with DES, a procedure commonly referred to as chemical castration, as an alternative to prison."
"Turing died on 7 June 1954, 16 days before his 42nd birthday, from cyanide poisoning. An inquest determined his death as a suicide."
"If you're unfamiliar with Turing and what he did for the world (and also the punishment he had to endure after the fact), I highly recommend watching The Imitation Game."
"It's a phenomenal movie, and Benedict Cumberbatch plays the role of Turing amazingly. It really drives home how extra terrible his death was, considering all of the good he did for the war effort."
"We likely would have lost the war (or struggled through it for a lot longer, and lost many more innocent lives) if not for him."
"Roberto Clemente was going to be a great humanitarian and role model after he retired. Charity and helping the people of the Caribbean and Latin-America was really important to him and he spent almost all his free time doing charity work.
"He played 18 seasons for the Pittsburgh Pirates, 13 seasons as an All-Star, played in 15 All-Star games, 12 Gold Glove Awards."
"Clemente was the first Caribbean and first Latin-American player to be inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. He was the first for many things in his career."
"MLB was only integrated for 8 years when Clemente started playing in 1955. What Jackie Robinson did for Black players, Clemente did for Caribbean and Latin-American players. Just think of all the MLB stars he paved the way for."
"The Roberto Clemente Award is given to the player who 'best exemplifies the game of baseball, sportsmanship, community involvement and the individual's contribution to his team'."
"His friends and teammates described him as a humble, kind man. He was 38 when he died in a plane crash delivering humanitarian aid to earthquake victims."
Stevie Ray Vaughn
"Stevie Ray Vaughan."
"He really got his sh*t together and seemed to really be in a good place career wise and in his personal life."
"Dude played the cleanest guitar I've ever heard. No missed notes or leaning on too much feedback or too many effects or anything."
"Steve Irwin—I believe his conservation work would have probably spilled over into environmental issues and he seemed passionate about doing good not just fame and money."
"He is my inspiration."
"I was in 6th grade when he died, and it took me some time to get here, but I currently have a degree in Forestry, Wildlife and Fisheries and I'm working on a second in Forestry conservation and restoration sciences."
"I'd like to think that one day I'll be able to make the world a slightly better place even if I'll never have the impact he did."
"I think Robert and Bindi (and recently, Terri, too!) are doing great work to reach a modern audience with social media these days. Of course, nothing will ever be like The Crocodile Hunter ever again."
"That show was a gem of its time. I still grieve Steve when I watch their content, especially when they show clips of him. But it's so cool to watch his family carry on his legacy."
"Within the sphere of music, I think Jeff Buckley is unquestionably the answer."
"'Grace' is an absolute tour de force of a debut and my easy pick for best album of the 1990’s. He was an almost indescribably incredible vocalist and fantastic young songwriter who likely would have only gotten better at his craft."
"It’s such a shame he never got to finish that second album because even what we have of it contains some gems and I’m sure the finished product would have been incredible."
"Buddy Holly. Of course, he already wrote some fantastic songs, but man would it be a treat to see his songwriting in the '60s!"
"Could end up being the same or he could have grown. But it's those what-ifs!"
"Buddy Holly was only 22 when he died. Lennon and McCartney had not peaked by that age, so who knows where he would have gone with his music."
"Buddy would have been 30 in the summer of 1967, the Summer of Love. Maybe he’d have been out playing in a toga in Golden Gate Park with shoulder length hair and granny glasses, protesting the war in Vietnam."
"Sadly, we’ll never know."
"His ability to create the most absurd possible sentences and situations and make them as funny as they are... amazing writer."
"The infinite improbability drive. The hyperspace bypass. The bowl of petunias. Really knowing where your towel is."
"So much happy silliness. Might just have to dig out my copy and read it again."
Martin Luther King Jr.
"Martin Luther King Jr. People remember him as some wise old man. He was 39 when he died."
"Martin Luther King Jr., Anne Frank, and Barbara Walters were all born in 1929."
"It's actually crazy to think MLK could have feasibly lived past the 00's, even the 10's."
"Like, can you imagine THE Martin Luther King Jr weighing in on the 2016 election as an 85-year-old man?"
"What an alternate timeline that would be."
"Or if he lived to see Obama become President."
"Thomas Sankara was only 37 when he was assassinated."
"He brought through huge reforms in Burkina Faso in such a short space of time."
"He increased literacy massively and improved women's rights, also brought through vaccination programs and improved infrastructure."
"None of which was popular with the French."
"Jimi Hendrix hadn't even reached his full potential when he died."
"Yet he is still regarded by many to be the best guitarist of all time."
"Imagine if he had lived."
"The man made sounds that no one had ever heard before in the history of humanity."
The Good Doctor
"My husband. He was special to me yes, but he was important to his patients. We all know about the ER docs that are dismissive, condescending, and are just all around jerks. My husband, even at his most burnt out wasn’t like that. He was the type you pray you get."
"The one that will actually listen, who will figure out what’s going on. It didn’t matter if you were female, a POC, trans, or any combination. He was listening. He was going to treat your pain. He wasn’t going to send you home until he had an answer."
"I knew this about him, but it was confirmed by the patients that left messages on his obituary page. Sure he did the usual emergency med life saving things. But a car accident is easy. There’s no argument about whether or not a patient is hurt. It’s assumed something is wrong."
It was surprising just how young some of these people were when they died.
Who else do you think was gone too soon?
It's funny, because depending on our financial management, some of us get really "spend happy" once we have an adult job with adult money.
But others realize instead that they may not need to buy everything they can suddenly afford, but just that one thing they've wanted since childhood.
Curious about others' wish list items, Redditor zydollasiign asked:
"What did you purchase as an adult because you could never have it as a child?"
A Metal Detector
"A metal detector. I always wanted one as a kid, but my dad said I'd use it a handful of times, and then it would sit and collect dust forever."
"I bought myself one, and it turns out that my dad was right."
"Desserts at restaurants."
"Yes! And appetizers and a soda. I was only ever allowed to get one thing; I could choose an appetizer, a main dish, OR a dessert. But getting all three and a drink makes me feel so bougie."
Options at the Book Fair
"It's not about what I buy myself but I make sure my kid has plenty of money for the book fair."
"The parent I dream to be… you’re awesome."
The Big Pack
"The gigantic pack of Crayola crayons!! Just took me 65 years… lol (laughing out loud)... and I love them!"
"I don’t share my 120-pack, either. I got the variety pack of Sharpie and Flair, too!"
"Clothes that fit."
"Ugh, my mother was absolutely DELUSIONAL about what size clothing I wore. I was 18-20 before I realized that you weren't SUPPOSED to buy clothes you could just barely squeeze yourself into, clothes that dug deep red marks into you all day, clothes that caused you physical pain to wear. It was incredible the first time I bought myself a pair of pants that actually fit."
"Opposite for me. My mom was paranoid about me "growing out" of stuff and it was so embarrassing and uncomfortable. Having so much extra fabric is so uncomfortable and makes it so hard to just function like a normal human."
"Having clothes that were the correct size was life-changing."
"I work somewhere that sells a specialty clothing item for a youth activity (think something like sports jerseys). I frequently have to talk moms out of buying several sizes too big for their teenagers!"
"Yes, when the kid is eight and wearing a medium, I tell mom to get a large or even an XL so it fits for more than six months. But it is shocking to me how many moms want to buy a 2XL for their 15-year-olds who wear a small!"
"They’re not going to keep growing that much! Let them get the one they’ll be comfortable in. It’s like they have no idea when a kid will stop growing, even when the kid is taller than them."
"I can relate to this so hard, it hurts."
A Gaming System
"All the current gaming consoles. Feels good, man!"
"And never have time to play anything! My PS5 might as well be a $600 paperweight."
"Feel you here. I’m able to buy any game I want now. Have about 300 quality games in my library. Super juiced computer. If I am able to play for a few hours on a Friday night, it’s a win. Adulting is a paradox."
Ice Cream Cake
"Ice Cream Cake."
"My sister was a spring baby. She got ice cream cakes. I never got ice cream cakes because it was hot for my birthday and my mother said they'd melt too quickly."
"Now I get my own d**n ice cream cakes. I don't care if they melt."
"Growing up, I never got a birthday cake in the flavor that I liked because my mom hated those flavors. Now I don't have to dread having to eat my own birthday cake anymore."
"The fastest Internet I could buy in my area."
"Same, grew up on Dial-up. It was torture."
A Comfortable Mattress
"As a teen, I started sleeping on the floor because my childhood mattress was so bad. I remember buying my first new one as an adult. It was one of those memory foam ones that came in a box."
"I ordered it online and paid $600. I felt like I was rich being able to do that. And it was the best mattress I had ever slept on."
"Same here. My mom kept saying she was allergic, but suddenly, now that I'm on my own, she has no issues taking care of him when I leave town. Make it make sense."
"Comfortable shoes! Growing up with flat feet and parents who didn’t want to shell out a lot of money for shoes meant that I wore uncomfortable tennis shoes for years. That’s why as soon as it was warm enough and sometimes not, I would wear flip-flops because they didn’t hurt my feet."
"My husband makes sure my shoes fit comfortably because when we met, my one 'comfortable' pair was falling apart because I was so broke, I couldn’t afford shoes. He took me shoe shopping as a date and bought me comfortable shoes."
"(Crying emoji), what a keeper."
"Protect that man at all cost."
"I grew up in a home where my parents practiced a religion that said you can’t seek medical help or go to doctors. I always wanted the Operation game and a pretend doctor’s bag like my friends had."
"When I became a parent, my child received a play doctor’s kit and the Operation game for Christmas one year."
"Raising my glass to FINALLY knowing 100% no one will rifle through my things and then confront me because they didn’t like what they found and then blame god for telling them to do it."
"No, Mom, no one told you to snoop. You went through my stuff hoping to find something shocking, and got mad because all you learned was that I left my laundry in the dryer without folding it on purpose just to annoy you and that Dad let me have half a beer one night while we watched 'Bubba HoTep' on USA UP All night."
"Same! My mom used to go through my things and read my journal. I never understood it, I was a nerd with a small group of friends who didn't drink, smoke, or do drugs, or have a boyfriend for that matter."
"I caught her so many times that she banned me from using the word 'snoop.'"
"Anyway, I understand now, it wasn't about being worried about me, it was about having control over me and me knowing I didn't have a safe space."
"Congrats to all the kids that finally reclaimed their safe place."
"Aww man. I could name multitudes. I have been very blessed since I got married."
"But the main thing I do now is buy multiples of various grocery items we buy regularly to just keep the house stocked. When we open the last one, I go out and buy two or three more."
"Something about just knowing you have it available is comforting. Growing up we never bought anything unless we were OUT of it."
This conversation went from wholesome to anticlimactic to heartbreaking and back again.
There were some basic wants, like privacy, properly-fitting clothing, and appropriate shoes, that everyone should just be able to have. They should be a right rather than a privilege.
But fortunately, there were enjoyable things here, too, like more money for the Book Fair, fuzzy companions, and ice cream cake, that are wonderful to give to ourselves when our parents were unwilling or unable.
Adult money needs to be put toward bills and basic expenses, yes, but it should be put toward joy, too.