Jilted People Reveal Why They Broke Up With Their Best Friend[rebelmouse-image 18351881 is_animated_gif=
A best friend is a special bond based on trust, openness, and honesty. But what happens when these standards break down, and one best friend totally betrays the other? Have you ever had to dump a best friend?
TakinShots asked, [Serious] Why is your ex-best friend an ex-best friend?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Ouch. Hopefully she didn't keep the husband either.[rebelmouse-image 18351882 is_animated_gif=
Because she had an affair with my husband (which I discovered when she had his baby).
Best friends don't do any of these things.[rebelmouse-image 18351883 is_animated_gif=
Invited me (and my 4-year-old daughter) to his home country and excitedly made plans with me for the six months leading up to it. I get there naturally expecting to hang out, but understanding that he has real life obligations (job, wife, etc). Long story short, we get zero time together. I was miffed but made the best of the trip just being away with my daughter.
He came by where I was staying after not communicating with me all week and offered my last weekend away to go to a cabin in the mountains four hours away for a couple nights. I took him up on it because despite being upset about him ditching me, I was hopeful that it was just an off week for him and that we could finally hang out. I really liked the guy and assumed he thought of me as I did him, a brother.
Anyway, we spent the night at the cabin after barely speaking the whole trip there (I tried several times to initiate conversation) and the next morning he promptly kicked me out. IN THE MIDDLE OF F**KING NOWHERE. He said he needed the time with his wife.
There I was, stranded with my luggage and my daughter in a foreign country and not expecting any of this. He was so casual about it "It just didn't work out". I could have knocked his teeth out for that. He gaslighted me over text messages as soon as I got home and I haven't spoken to him since.
He was my best and closest friend. I don't think I'll ever understand why he did that.
A ghosting best friend is no best friend.[rebelmouse-image 18351885 is_animated_gif=
I wish I knew, she one day just stopped talking to me and ignored all my messages.
Addiction shows no mercy.[rebelmouse-image 18351886 is_animated_gif=
He od'ed on heroin.
Sometimes people simply have to move on, as hard as it is.[rebelmouse-image 18351887 is_animated_gif=
She felt that I'm not relevant to her anymore???????
When you get replaced by a toxic relationship...[rebelmouse-image 18351888 is_animated_gif=
She was dating a guy she would always fight with. She would ditch me for him and drugs. She would get mad when I wanted to spend time with my boyfriend. She would call in the middle of the night and ask me to pick her drunk self up only to get in her car and drive home. Basically, it was one-sided and all about her.
MLMs often tell recruits to cut out non-believers from their lives.[rebelmouse-image 18351889 is_animated_gif=
She started selling oils from a pyramid scheme and drank too much Kool-Aid.
When having the biggest of hearts and best of intentions gets you nowhere...[rebelmouse-image 18351890 is_animated_gif=
Because he wouldn't do anything to better himself, no matter how much help I offered. He'd rather sponge charity meals off of other people than try to support himself.
A high school dropout, but a bright enough guy. Would get jobs, not go to work so he could play games with friends instead. Would whine about getting fired like it wasn't his fault. "I only called off fake-sick for my first three Friday nights, I don't see the big deal."
Said (perhaps rightly) that it was because he was a dropout that he couldn't get better jobs.
I offered to pay for him to take his GED classes and for the test. He said he worried it would be too hard. I offered to TAKE the GED classes with him so I could know what the subject was at any given time and help him study...AND I offered to pay for his first year at a community college if he didn't get full financial aid. He kept telling me, "I'd probably just fail you."
The only way he was failing me was by not trying.
Even after all that, I would have still tried to stay friends with him. But he'd also do things like invite ME out to lunch or dinner, then expect me to pay for it every time.
The combination was eventually just more than I wanted to deal with any more.
If it's all about you, this friendship won't do.[rebelmouse-image 18351891 is_animated_gif=
He's a manipulative liar and a huge egotist. Never will speak to him again.
Some people think they deserve to be punished, but onl end up punishing themselves.[rebelmouse-image 18351892 is_animated_gif=
I was best friends with let's call him Chris for many years. Chris was always the life of the party, everyone loved him. Just an overall fun, funny dude, with a good head on his shoulders, but he had very low self-confidence.
I was his best friend for years. We would talk every day, hang out all the time, workout together, etc. Eventually, we all went to college, and Chris and I stayed close friends, but I started hanging out a bit more with a girl, let's call her Maria. Maria was cool, and friendly with Chris, all was well until Maria started inviting her friend "Ashley" along. Ashley was nasty, rude, and well...evil. She treated her friends like absolute shit. I couldn't stand hanging out with her.
But Chris liked her. I think it was just because she paid special attention to him, and because he had such low self-esteem, he felt that this is what he deserved, and it was the best that he could do. They eventually dated, and we all stayed in touch, until one night, they broke up, and he called me in tears.
He explained that he got her a necklace. He went out of his way to pick out something that he thought that she would like, and she threw it back at him and said to return in. I thought that this was so horribly mean, so I told him, "Look, man, I know you think that this girl is right for you, but she's not, and you will realize that when someone better comes along and treats you like a decent human. It was thoughtful of you to do that for her, and she didn't even appreciate the thought, that's horrible." He told me I was right, thanked me, and we made plans to hang out.
Then they got back together a few days later, and I literally never heard from him again. I tried to text him, call him, etc., with no reply. Every year for three years I would text him on his birthday and Christmas just to wish him well, but he never replied. It's sad, but, I think he told Ashley about what I said, and her being completely controlling and manipulative forbade him from seeing me.
My cousin just messaged me the other day that he ran into him and that his number is the same that it has always been. Also, he's married now. I always still thinking about texting him and wishing him well, but I always decide against it. I would never make him choose me over his girlfriend, and I just feel bad that he threw away years of a friendship for this very unpleasant person.
Is it ever too late for second chances?[rebelmouse-image 18351893 is_animated_gif=
My possessive boyfriend made me choose between him and her and I made the wrong decision :( its my biggest regret in life, I miss her so much.
The best friend chose her fate by aligning with bullies.[rebelmouse-image 18347896 is_animated_gif=
She made friends with people who bullied me so I stopped hanging out with her and we drifted apart.
Sabotaging your best friend's relationships? Deal breaker.[rebelmouse-image 18351894 is_animated_gif=
If a guy ever liked me over her she would get him alone and make up nasty things about me to turn them off of me. Took me a few times of interested guys just ghosting me suddenly to realize what was happening. She was super jealous of any other girls getting attention and used to bitch a lot so it didn't surprise me. It's annoying now to see her preach about women supporting women online though.
Admitting to your best friend that you're in love with them? That's risky business.[rebelmouse-image 18351896 is_animated_gif=
Personally, I think it was (and still is) my fault.
I was really good friends with this girl for around 4 years. We did everything together - go to the movies, dine out, chill at each others' house - the usual best buds stuff.
I still don't know how, but somehow, someday, I started developing some feelings for her. Out of fear that my confession would disrupt the friendship, I decided to stay mum. Once, when we were out drinking, we were doing the regular chit-chat when I just...told her.
She just looked at me for a moment and became silent throughout the night. I knew I'd blown it.
So I decided to give her space. I temporarily ceased communication with her. After a week or so, she texted me and told me that she thought about it for a long time and that she doesn't feel the same way.
The now me would have completely understood, but I was an egoist back then. I felt hurt, but I didn't spontaneously retaliate - I decided to let the friendship decay away.
As the days went by, I gradually started decreasing contact with her. It went from "one-worded text replies" to complete ghosting. I felt stupid, but it was my pride at stake, after all (/s).
Eventually, we ceased talking. We still don't talk to this day. I miss her like crazy, but I know I've made the friendship irreparable. Every time "Wish you were here" plays, I remember her and start crying.
For people who are doing what I did - PLEASE don't. It's not worth it; trust me.
Sounds like someone was just trying to stir up drama. No thanks.[rebelmouse-image 18351897 is_animated_gif=
She always had complaints about her other friend, but never listened to any of my advice. I also found out that she was emotionally manipulating her other friends. OK, bye.
People do strange things in order to feel like they fit in, even if what they do is harmful.[rebelmouse-image 18351898 is_animated_gif=
He was a smart guy, very friendly if not a bit lonely. We were both very close as young kids but when we started high school I fell into the 'normie' crowd whilst he quickly made friends with the more troublesome students. He would get into trouble to amuse them and this became a part of his personality in general over time (in fact this happened to a lot of close friends).
This basically ended the friendship after a year or two and what I can't understand is, is that he is still like this, 10 years after high school. C'mon Ed, time to grow up.
Toxic people spread misery.[rebelmouse-image 18351899 is_animated_gif=
I hate conflict, especially with loved ones. I always try to avoid escalating a dispute in any way I can - even if that means putting someone else's wants before mine.
I was upset with this person over how their uninvited friends crashed and treated me at my own birthday party. I spent the night crying in a corner of the place. As respectfully as I could, I raised this issue to said best friend a couple of days later and they completely exploded on me. Their insults ranged from how ungrateful I was to them to what a horrible friend I am. As a bonus, they even told me that me learning how to speak up for myself shouldn't be tested out on them because I have plenty more fake friends to call out.
I cut contact after that without looking back and the weight off my shoulders is much lighter :)
Best friend literally stealing your man? Girl bye.[rebelmouse-image 18351901 is_animated_gif=
Was best friends with a girl for many years. It was basically a sappy "girls' night" movie type thing. We shared clothes, had sleepovers, got ready for parties together, texted all the time. People thought we were sisters. Also, this is into our late 20s, not grade school.
I was dating a guy that I was absolutely nuts about. Long story short, he went from amazing and charming to condescending and mean. I was absolutely heartbroken about it and confided in my best friend, of course. I detailed to her all the reasons why it didn't work out and she watched sad movies and ate ice cream with me.
Suddenly best friend was less and less available. I'd ask what she was up to and get weird strained answers. I asked her on several occasions if she was seeing my ex (she'd expressed an interest before we dated), and she said no.
This goes on for several weeks until I get a pocket dial from her on my voicemail. It's literally her flirting with my ex and talking about all the reasons we broke up and why that's not a problem for her.
I texted her to ask what she was up to, she lied, so I made an audio file of the voicemail to send to her and never heard from her again.
Friendships require trust and honesty. Without those, what's the point?[rebelmouse-image 18351902 is_animated_gif=
I started realizing how often she was lying about things. Even little things that I couldn't understand why she would even bother lying about them.
After I was aware of the compulsive lying, I just couldn't trust anything she ever said and I started to disconnect.
- People Share How Their BFF Became Their Ex-Friend - George Takei ›
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- People Break Down What Can Instantly Ruin A Friendship - George Takei ›
- People Divulge Why They Stopped Talking To Their Childhood Best Friend - George Takei ›
- People Share The Real Reason They Cut All Ties With A Friend - George Takei ›
- People Explain Why They Really Severed All Ties With Their Best Friend - George Takei ›
Every now and then, we can't help but be proud of certain accomplishments.
Graduating from college or grad school, earning a promotion at work, hosting your first Thanksgiving dinner.
Though it shouldn't be forgotten that pride is one of the seven deadly sins.
Which should serve as a reminder that we should be careful of what we boast over, and that some accomplishments might not be cause for celebration.
A Redditor was curious to hear some of the more questionable skills and/or accomplishments people have boasted about, leading them to ask:
"What are people stupidly proud of?"
Yeah... not cool.
"My ex actually said, 'Yeah, I saw this guy in a pub yesterday who tried talking to us so I basically burned his stupid shirt for an hour lol,' which is one of the main reasons I broke up with him."- AnyCurrency6027Giphy
Always read the fine print.
"Those IQ tests people share but they don't know how to read their results."
"Had some guy just so proud that he was in the top 90%."- 7grendel
Can knowing and doing nothing really be considered an accomplishment?
"Example: pride in not knowing how to do basic math."- stupidlyugly
"Willful ignorance."- storm_the_castle
"Amazingly and increasingly, ignorance."- vanta_blacknessGiphy
Definitely not the parent who deserves to be celebrated..
"My dad, a father of 7, brags that he's never changed a diaper."
"Like, congratulations on being no help?"- Porrick
...Where do you even start?...
“'I’m proud of myself, I haven’t cheated in a while'.”
"Me: 'it’s been 2 months and I’m not f*cking proud of you'.”- Pufferfish4467
They shouldn't be allowed to have pets!
"That their dog weighs so much, but really it's an obese sausage with legs who can't even take three steps without running out of breath."- whiskybidnus
But what's the payoff?
"Long commute times and working hours."- KyotoGaijin
"I'm terrible at my job, let's celebrate!"
"Teachers being proud that their classes are hard and their students are always failing."- GreatXsGiphy
It's hard to imagine what some of these people were thinking when they boasted about these non-accomplishments.
In all likelihood, they weren't thinking at all.
I love TV!
Some television shows are a part of my DNA. That's why an ending is so important.
In the end we want to be forever satisfied. Which is a near impossible ask. Not everyone is going to love the chosen ending.
But sometimes writers really get it right... Buffy the Vampire Slayer... (save for *@#*'s death!!) is EVERYTHING.
But then they can get it really wrong... Game Of Thrones fans are STILL fuming apparently.
Redditorslice29wanted to discuss all the best entertainment endings we've ever watched.
"In your opinion, what TV show had the most satisfying ending?"
I hate and love endings of shows. I love them when they're done well. I hate that it's over. Let's start with one of my favs!!
End of Life
"Six Feet Under."
"Watched this in real time with my mom. The whole show. Every episode. As they aired. I grew up along with it, and the ending felt like the opposite of a death - I was a grown up. You're right."
ipakookapisix feet under GIF by HBOGiphy
"Sledge Hammer! For those too young to remember this gem from the 80s, it was a show that satirized the Dirty Harry-style bad cop dramas that were in at the time. The show ended with Sledge trying to defuse a nuke ('Trust me, I know what I'm doing...'), failing."
"And then the camera slow-pans across the charred landscape of the ruined city and you hear the distant voice of the long-suffering police chief yelling 'HHHAAAAMMMMMMMEEERRRRR!!!!!!' Priceless."
"Blackadder Goes Forth The ending of a comedy set in WWI trenches to end with everyone dying after going over the wall is both sobering and satisfying."
"When Darling thinks the war is over because all the guns stopped firing. 'Thank God! We lived through it! The Great War: 1914-1917.' But we know there was still another whole year of war to go through."
"Newhart. No one in America saw that plot twist coming."
"And with the rise of the internet, I doubt any show could pull off a twist like that again and take people by surprise. The Season 1 finale to 'The Good Place"'was a rare exception of this happening post-internet."
"The twist is that good, and so few people saw the show during its original run, that there are probably tons of people discovering it every week. I don't want to ruin it for anybody."
"Cheers. 'We're closed.'"
"Thought the same thing. Have been going through the series again, usually one a day and about to start the last season."
SnooLobsters4636Cbs Cheers GIF by Paramount+Giphy
Ah 'Cheers.' Not my favorite show, but a great end. And 'Six Feet Under?' GENIUS!
"The Good Place."
"I need to rewatch that show. If someone told me to watch a show about the afterlife, philosophy, morality, interspersed with d*ck jokes I wouldn't be able to take it seriously but somehow they pulled it off."
jn2010Season 1 Nbc GIF by The Good PlaceGiphy
The Tie Up
"Gravity Falls. Tied everything up nicely, but left me wanting more, but what good show doesn't?"
"I want more so bad, but we all know it's better to die a hero than a 25 seasons show nobody wants to watch."
"Agreed. Whether Alex Hirsch does something new in the future or just sods off with his residual checks, I couldn't be more proud."
"why we fight"
"'Cherish the memory of a question my grandson asked me the other day when he said, ‘Grandpa were you a hero in the war?’ Grandpa said ‘No... But I served in a company of heroes.'"
"Band of brothers is GOAT. Even reading that line gave me goosebumps I stumbled across 'why we fight' the other day, must have seen it 20 odd times, watched it again, still amazing. In fact, my missus is out tmrw, you've inspired me to start episode one again."
"M*A*S*H, still the greatest final episode in TV history. It made it clear that nobody would be the same after the war. Winchester couldn't love music like he had before without being reminded of the war. Father Mulcahy lost his hearing as a result of the war. Hawkeye lost some of his sanity."
"Margaret had to lose her self-reliance and realize that it is okay to accept help. Potter had to lose his beloved horse, which was his #1 way to stay sane. BJ had to learn to say goodbye. And, of course, Klinger had to give up his dream of leaving Korea at least for the foreseeable future."
"There are times (most times for me) when being in the military totally sucks. Living in deplorable conditions, spending 24 hours a day with the same people; working, playing, and sleeping together with people you like and people you hate. Missing your family and loved ones. Yet, when you have to separate, the feeling of loss is like nothing else that I have experienced in civilian life."
"Star Trek TNG. The episode itself was great, but that ending scene was phenomenal."
"'Nothing is wild and the sky is the limit.'"
HaCo111annoyed star trek GIFGiphy
Those are definitely some incredible endings. And endings are hard to pull off.
Friendship is not something that can be forced.
As with any kind of relationship, it all depends on compatibility and chemistry, and thus must happen organically.
On the flip side though, it can be pretty clear when people will not end up being your friends, owing to a fundamental difference in personality or beliefs.
Redditor Chola_Bhatora was curious to hear the type of people the Reddit community would never become chummy with, leading them to ask:
"What kind of person would you never be friends with?"
Basically, people who aren't nice
"People who don't apologize for their mistakes, blame others for their problems, and generally complain without doing anything about their situation."
"Oh, and generally a**holes."- NerdyDadGuy1981
"People who are overly rude and constantly laugh it off and call themselves 'a**holes' as if it is an uncontrollable character trait."- Business_Grand7665
Don't you twist my words around!
"People that distort what you said."- Mystery_Ireal housewives lies GIF by leeannelockenGiphy
Just take some responsibility!
"People who can never admit they're wrong about anything."
"No matter how blatantly wrong."- Rachfo44
Say it to my face!
"The kind that talks behind your back."- 0breanna0
Are you sure about that?
"Someone who thinks they already know everything."- Fragrant-Crow-4513know it all boomerang GIFGiphy
Then why aren't I laughing?
"Someone that puts you down in front of your other friends.. 'as a joke'."- motherfugher
How well do you actually know them?
"People who abuse your trust and honesty to manipulate you, especially when they disguise it so well."
"Had it one too many times, thankfully gets easier to spot but some people are freakishly good at it."- nothingjustk
Yeah, well mine's better!
"One uppers."- BasedChickenTendiekristen wiig television GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy
Someone needs a lesson in self respect...
"I'm a woman."
"Had a classmate strike a conversation with me for the first time."
"2 minutes in said she doesn't have female friends because all women are b*tches."
"Why are you talking to me then?"
"What do you think you are?"- Minimum_Greedy
As Jane Austen famously explored in Pride and Prejudice, first impressions can often be misleading.
But every now and then, they can give a crystal clear depiction of who someone really is.
Which could easily be someone you do not want to be friends with.
Age is just a number.
We all hope to stay sexy until the end.
And even when we don't feel sexy, maybe there will be people who still think we are.
Redditor Debonair-Redditor21wanted to hear about famous crushes that enter into the "Harold & Maude" territory. They asked:
"Who is the oldest celebrity that you still find attractive?"
All Hail Dame Helen Mirren. Is there anything else to say?
How Old?Viggo Mortensen Peace GIF by Golden GlobesGiphy
"Viggo Mortensen. Very handsome at 63."
"Damn, he is 63? Time flies."
"Elvira. Cassandra Peterson. Just turned 70 and still breaks out that amazing personality at every appearance."'
"Omg. I saw the BEST suggestion for a movie ever. Elvira & Dolly Parton playing their stage personas as estranged sisters who must team up to fight evil."
Fatalejane seymour call me kitty cat GIFGiphy
"Jane Seymour. 71 and still stunning."
"Live and Let Die. Incredible, and she'll always be in my mind as Elise McKenna, the woman so beautiful that Christopher Reeve's character went back to be with her in Somewhere in Time. I totally get the desire."
"Susanna Hoffs (63)."
"Plot twist: She sang 'Walk Like an Egyptian' because she's immortal and actually lived in Ancient Egypt."
"She was my first crush. As a child, I used to watch MTV for hours just for that moment when she cut her eyes in the 'Walk Like an Egyptian' video."
I am loving this list. I didn't think I would.
Maddymads mikkelsen hannibal GIFGiphy
"You mean my daddy issues? Damn I love that guy. Death Stranding really nailed how he can come through a medium without much hassle."
My Biological Clock
"Jesus, I was so confused watching the new Spider-Man movies with Marisa as Aunt May. Marisa Tomei is perpetually the hot 80s chick in my head, also Jennifer Connelly. I was watching Morbius and seeing Requiem for a Dream and Career Opportunities. I AM OLD, I GUESS."
"Christopher Plummer, right up until the day he died at 92."
"I first saw ‘The Sound of Music’ as a child, watched in many times, know if off by heart etc. I didn’t watch for many years."
"Then as an adult I wanted to introduce a friend’s kid to it, put it on, and spent the next couple of hours absolutely dumbstruck by how hot Christopher Plummer was. It had never struck me before that time but go**amn have I never forgotten. No wonder Maria chose the Captain, if I had to choose between him and God I know who my pick would be."
"Timothy Olyphant. Idk what it is about him. He's so funny, charming, and handsome that I don't care how much older than me he is."
"I do NOT get tired of watching him; he is so expressive. In Catch and Release there's a scene where he and Jennifer Garner are having a conversation that consists entirely of gestures and facial expressions. Hilarious!"
"He is amazing in Justified and Deadwood... hell, pretty much everything. I think I just found out I may have a man-crush on the dude lol."
YeohMichelle Yeoh No GIF by RegalGiphy
"Ugh she was a vision in Everything Everywhere All at Once. And if she doesn't win all the awards then there is something really wrong with the voting system."
"Oof that's kind of a hard one. Without looking up a bunch of older actors I think I'd have to go with Ken Watanabe. I think he's in his early 60s now and the last time I saw a recent pic of him he was still looking fine AF. And an honorable mention is Steve Carell... I don't know what it is but he keeps getting hotter with age. I was never attracted to him until he did that silver fox photo shoot with the paint brush 'n shi*t."
total class act...
"Stanley Tucci. As my mom says about handsome men, he just looks like he smells good."
"He visited our hotel a few weeks ago. As the Restaurant Manager I was specifically told that my team and I were not to treat him any different to other guests, which we don't."
"The guy was a total class act polite, courteous, and always keen for a chat. Never mentioned his movies, his career, but was there to enjoy time with his family, and they themselves were also a joy to be around. Can confirm he always had a slight aroma of warm cinnamon."
Well that is a long list of sexy. Cheers to growing sexy with age.