Jilted People Reveal Why They Broke Up With Their Best Friend
[rebelmouse-image 18351881 is_animated_gif=A best friend is a special bond based on trust, openness, and honesty. But what happens when these standards break down, and one best friend totally betrays the other? Have you ever had to dump a best friend?
TakinShots asked, [Serious] Why is your ex-best friend an ex-best friend?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Ouch. Hopefully she didn't keep the husband either.
[rebelmouse-image 18351882 is_animated_gif=Because she had an affair with my husband (which I discovered when she had his baby).
Best friends don't do any of these things.
[rebelmouse-image 18351883 is_animated_gif=Invited me (and my 4-year-old daughter) to his home country and excitedly made plans with me for the six months leading up to it. I get there naturally expecting to hang out, but understanding that he has real life obligations (job, wife, etc). Long story short, we get zero time together. I was miffed but made the best of the trip just being away with my daughter.
He came by where I was staying after not communicating with me all week and offered my last weekend away to go to a cabin in the mountains four hours away for a couple nights. I took him up on it because despite being upset about him ditching me, I was hopeful that it was just an off week for him and that we could finally hang out. I really liked the guy and assumed he thought of me as I did him, a brother.
Anyway, we spent the night at the cabin after barely speaking the whole trip there (I tried several times to initiate conversation) and the next morning he promptly kicked me out. IN THE MIDDLE OF F**KING NOWHERE. He said he needed the time with his wife.
There I was, stranded with my luggage and my daughter in a foreign country and not expecting any of this. He was so casual about it "It just didn't work out". I could have knocked his teeth out for that. He gaslighted me over text messages as soon as I got home and I haven't spoken to him since.
He was my best and closest friend. I don't think I'll ever understand why he did that.
A ghosting best friend is no best friend.
[rebelmouse-image 18351885 is_animated_gif=I wish I knew, she one day just stopped talking to me and ignored all my messages.
Addiction shows no mercy.
[rebelmouse-image 18351886 is_animated_gif=He od'ed on heroin.
Sometimes people simply have to move on, as hard as it is.
[rebelmouse-image 18351887 is_animated_gif=She felt that I'm not relevant to her anymore???????
When you get replaced by a toxic relationship...
[rebelmouse-image 18351888 is_animated_gif=She was dating a guy she would always fight with. She would ditch me for him and drugs. She would get mad when I wanted to spend time with my boyfriend. She would call in the middle of the night and ask me to pick her drunk self up only to get in her car and drive home. Basically, it was one-sided and all about her.
MLMs often tell recruits to cut out non-believers from their lives.
[rebelmouse-image 18351889 is_animated_gif=She started selling oils from a pyramid scheme and drank too much Kool-Aid.
When having the biggest of hearts and best of intentions gets you nowhere...
[rebelmouse-image 18351890 is_animated_gif=Because he wouldn't do anything to better himself, no matter how much help I offered. He'd rather sponge charity meals off of other people than try to support himself.
A high school dropout, but a bright enough guy. Would get jobs, not go to work so he could play games with friends instead. Would whine about getting fired like it wasn't his fault. "I only called off fake-sick for my first three Friday nights, I don't see the big deal."
Said (perhaps rightly) that it was because he was a dropout that he couldn't get better jobs.
I offered to pay for him to take his GED classes and for the test. He said he worried it would be too hard. I offered to TAKE the GED classes with him so I could know what the subject was at any given time and help him study...AND I offered to pay for his first year at a community college if he didn't get full financial aid. He kept telling me, "I'd probably just fail you."
The only way he was failing me was by not trying.
Even after all that, I would have still tried to stay friends with him. But he'd also do things like invite ME out to lunch or dinner, then expect me to pay for it every time.
The combination was eventually just more than I wanted to deal with any more.
If it's all about you, this friendship won't do.
[rebelmouse-image 18351891 is_animated_gif=He's a manipulative liar and a huge egotist. Never will speak to him again.
Some people think they deserve to be punished, but onl end up punishing themselves.
[rebelmouse-image 18351892 is_animated_gif=I was best friends with let's call him Chris for many years. Chris was always the life of the party, everyone loved him. Just an overall fun, funny dude, with a good head on his shoulders, but he had very low self-confidence.
I was his best friend for years. We would talk every day, hang out all the time, workout together, etc. Eventually, we all went to college, and Chris and I stayed close friends, but I started hanging out a bit more with a girl, let's call her Maria. Maria was cool, and friendly with Chris, all was well until Maria started inviting her friend "Ashley" along. Ashley was nasty, rude, and well...evil. She treated her friends like absolute shit. I couldn't stand hanging out with her.
But Chris liked her. I think it was just because she paid special attention to him, and because he had such low self-esteem, he felt that this is what he deserved, and it was the best that he could do. They eventually dated, and we all stayed in touch, until one night, they broke up, and he called me in tears.
He explained that he got her a necklace. He went out of his way to pick out something that he thought that she would like, and she threw it back at him and said to return in. I thought that this was so horribly mean, so I told him, "Look, man, I know you think that this girl is right for you, but she's not, and you will realize that when someone better comes along and treats you like a decent human. It was thoughtful of you to do that for her, and she didn't even appreciate the thought, that's horrible." He told me I was right, thanked me, and we made plans to hang out.
Then they got back together a few days later, and I literally never heard from him again. I tried to text him, call him, etc., with no reply. Every year for three years I would text him on his birthday and Christmas just to wish him well, but he never replied. It's sad, but, I think he told Ashley about what I said, and her being completely controlling and manipulative forbade him from seeing me.
My cousin just messaged me the other day that he ran into him and that his number is the same that it has always been. Also, he's married now. I always still thinking about texting him and wishing him well, but I always decide against it. I would never make him choose me over his girlfriend, and I just feel bad that he threw away years of a friendship for this very unpleasant person.
Is it ever too late for second chances?
[rebelmouse-image 18351893 is_animated_gif=My possessive boyfriend made me choose between him and her and I made the wrong decision :( its my biggest regret in life, I miss her so much.
The best friend chose her fate by aligning with bullies.
[rebelmouse-image 18347896 is_animated_gif=She made friends with people who bullied me so I stopped hanging out with her and we drifted apart.
Sabotaging your best friend's relationships? Deal breaker.
[rebelmouse-image 18351894 is_animated_gif=If a guy ever liked me over her she would get him alone and make up nasty things about me to turn them off of me. Took me a few times of interested guys just ghosting me suddenly to realize what was happening. She was super jealous of any other girls getting attention and used to bitch a lot so it didn't surprise me. It's annoying now to see her preach about women supporting women online though.
Admitting to your best friend that you're in love with them? That's risky business.
[rebelmouse-image 18351896 is_animated_gif=Personally, I think it was (and still is) my fault.
I was really good friends with this girl for around 4 years. We did everything together - go to the movies, dine out, chill at each others' house - the usual best buds stuff.
I still don't know how, but somehow, someday, I started developing some feelings for her. Out of fear that my confession would disrupt the friendship, I decided to stay mum. Once, when we were out drinking, we were doing the regular chit-chat when I just...told her.
She just looked at me for a moment and became silent throughout the night. I knew I'd blown it.
So I decided to give her space. I temporarily ceased communication with her. After a week or so, she texted me and told me that she thought about it for a long time and that she doesn't feel the same way.
The now me would have completely understood, but I was an egoist back then. I felt hurt, but I didn't spontaneously retaliate - I decided to let the friendship decay away.
As the days went by, I gradually started decreasing contact with her. It went from "one-worded text replies" to complete ghosting. I felt stupid, but it was my pride at stake, after all (/s).
Eventually, we ceased talking. We still don't talk to this day. I miss her like crazy, but I know I've made the friendship irreparable. Every time "Wish you were here" plays, I remember her and start crying.
For people who are doing what I did - PLEASE don't. It's not worth it; trust me.
Sounds like someone was just trying to stir up drama. No thanks.
[rebelmouse-image 18351897 is_animated_gif=She always had complaints about her other friend, but never listened to any of my advice. I also found out that she was emotionally manipulating her other friends. OK, bye.
People do strange things in order to feel like they fit in, even if what they do is harmful.
[rebelmouse-image 18351898 is_animated_gif=He was a smart guy, very friendly if not a bit lonely. We were both very close as young kids but when we started high school I fell into the 'normie' crowd whilst he quickly made friends with the more troublesome students. He would get into trouble to amuse them and this became a part of his personality in general over time (in fact this happened to a lot of close friends).
This basically ended the friendship after a year or two and what I can't understand is, is that he is still like this, 10 years after high school. C'mon Ed, time to grow up.
Toxic people spread misery.
[rebelmouse-image 18351899 is_animated_gif=I hate conflict, especially with loved ones. I always try to avoid escalating a dispute in any way I can - even if that means putting someone else's wants before mine.
I was upset with this person over how their uninvited friends crashed and treated me at my own birthday party. I spent the night crying in a corner of the place. As respectfully as I could, I raised this issue to said best friend a couple of days later and they completely exploded on me. Their insults ranged from how ungrateful I was to them to what a horrible friend I am. As a bonus, they even told me that me learning how to speak up for myself shouldn't be tested out on them because I have plenty more fake friends to call out.
I cut contact after that without looking back and the weight off my shoulders is much lighter :)
Best friend literally stealing your man? Girl bye.
[rebelmouse-image 18351901 is_animated_gif=Was best friends with a girl for many years. It was basically a sappy "girls' night" movie type thing. We shared clothes, had sleepovers, got ready for parties together, texted all the time. People thought we were sisters. Also, this is into our late 20s, not grade school.
I was dating a guy that I was absolutely nuts about. Long story short, he went from amazing and charming to condescending and mean. I was absolutely heartbroken about it and confided in my best friend, of course. I detailed to her all the reasons why it didn't work out and she watched sad movies and ate ice cream with me.
Suddenly best friend was less and less available. I'd ask what she was up to and get weird strained answers. I asked her on several occasions if she was seeing my ex (she'd expressed an interest before we dated), and she said no.
This goes on for several weeks until I get a pocket dial from her on my voicemail. It's literally her flirting with my ex and talking about all the reasons we broke up and why that's not a problem for her.
I texted her to ask what she was up to, she lied, so I made an audio file of the voicemail to send to her and never heard from her again.
Friendships require trust and honesty. Without those, what's the point?
[rebelmouse-image 18351902 is_animated_gif=I started realizing how often she was lying about things. Even little things that I couldn't understand why she would even bother lying about them.
After I was aware of the compulsive lying, I just couldn't trust anything she ever said and I started to disconnect.
- People Share How Their BFF Became Their Ex-Friend - George Takei ›
- People Divulge The Real Reason They Dropped A Childhood Best Friend - George Takei ›
- People Break Down What Can Instantly Ruin A Friendship - George Takei ›
- People Divulge Why They Stopped Talking To Their Childhood Best Friend - George Takei ›
- People Share The Real Reason They Cut All Ties With A Friend - George Takei ›
- People Explain Why They Really Severed All Ties With Their Best Friend - George Takei ›
Former Inmates Disclose Which Things People On The Outside Wouldn't Understand About Prison
Being a law-abiding citizen shouldn't be that difficult.
As long as people obey the rules, maintain their morals, and avoid making extremely bad decisions, they will never see the walls inside a prison cell.
Unfortunately, people do often break the law and find themselves in the slammer where their contemplations on life choices come a little too late.
But now that they have nowhere to go, what is the wisdom inmates acquire?
Curious to hear what some of those might be, Redditor Max_Fenig asked:
"Former inmates of Reddit, what are some things about prison that people outside wouldn't understand?"
Many speculations about life behind bars are confirmed here.
Boredom
"how boring it is. you spend your entire time just waiting. waiting for court. waiting for a sentence. waiting to get out. it’s a level of boredom i never want to experience again."
– Necessary-Rabbit-340
Misery Loves Company
"Starchy food and a lack of dental care."
– tacopony_789
Waiting In Lines
"Seriously. Between regular prison stuff, it's all just waiting in lines. Picking up commissary? Go wait in line. Doctors appointment? We'll wake you up at 4am so you can go wait in line. (Also, why did the doctors always have to check me out at 4am? One time, they woke me up for medical and for a split sec I didn't know where I was so I just put my hands down my pants and went back to sleep. Guards just laughed and told me to wake my a** up...lol)"
– nnnoooeee
Like A Psych Ward
"No kidding. Your feeling of helplessness is so intense. I sat there thinking I was just a bit down and sad. So now you lock me up and treat me like child and expect me to suddenly be happy? I didn't gain anything from it except learning to keep my sadness to myself and not reach out for help."
"Left the place barely being able to function from my depression to being so drugged up I could barely function. No change in my status to society etc. Just a change in the cause."
– Ashotep
Some former inmates miss the established sense of order and the mundanity of life in prison.
Weird Kind Of Freedom
"Sometimes you miss it once you're out."
"There are some days where I just feel defeated by the daily stresses of life, and I remember being able to wake up every day and not really have to worry about a lot of things: I don't have rent or utilities to pay, I don't have to go grocery shopping, I don't have to do yard work, I don't have to keep a schedule of places to be and worry about making sure I have enough time to get from place to place or anything. It was a weird kind of freedom while being extremely un-free."
– bstyledevi
The School Analogy
"I think this is part of what I miss about being a kid. School was like an optimistic 'prison' in that we were told what to do and when. But that in itself was freeing, because I didn’t have to worry about planning the day, or my life. I didn’t miss out on things bc we all went to the same things. It felt like the guidance we had would make everything turn out okay."
"This is part of what’s difficult about being an adult, that you don’t know what you’re doing. You don’t know if youre making the best choices, you constantly fear missing out on other things while doing anything, you got no guarantee of social interaction with others. People aren’t trusting of you by default, and every first interaction is an attempt to convince people that you’re a good enough person to engage with."
"Someone’s always there to catch you from falling and help you out in school as a kid. As an adult, there’s no safety net, no one’s coming to save you, because you’re on your own."
– ItActuallyIsGullible
Going Through The Motions
"Yeah, its so easy once you get used to it. Everything is figured out for you, you got a stable rutine and there are clear rules and bounderies. Also you usually have a tight group of friends that you share everything with."
"I spend a year in the army as a conscript and I was pretty down after it ended, because I had to return to a life of a young man where everything was still so unclear and difficult."
– ManyPerformance9608
Finding A Community
"Honestly, it's not always so bad. These days there are so many drug addicts in low sec prisons that they sometimes group them together in the same blocks. I was one of them, and everyone was respectful and friendly. When I got there I was in full opiate withdrawal and my cell mates gave me food and comfort to help me get through it. This is not always the case, for sure, but I've dealt with worse people on the outside than when I was locked up."
– boston_nsca
For the most part, ex-cons believed the reality of life in prison didn't closely reflect Hollywood depictions.
Don't Rock The Boat
"Ex-Con here. One thing about Prison I feel like people don’t understand when I tell them my story is that Prison (at least for me) isn’t entirely like what it is in the media. Yeah sure there is Riots, Yard fights, people get shanked, and there scary dudes who look like they want to kill you but in reality they just look mean and scary as a way to protect themselves. For instance there was this big tough dude who was actually a chill dude and got cigs and stuff for others guys if you treated him right. So in reality if you treat other inmates right and don’t bad mouth anyone then you’ll be fine. Just don’t do the what the 'skinny idiot' did, and that is act all SUPER tough and get in peoples faces because that is what will get you beaten up."
– Suitable_Panic_7558
Surprising Civility
"Prison society is exceptionally polite 99% of the time. Inmates have some of the best manners of anyone you will ever interact with. They hold doors for the next person even if they are far away and have to wait. They say please and thank you. They do not insult each other or show disrespect."
"If you are ever in prison and see inmates acting impolite towards each other, get the f'k out of there. That 1% when it's not polite is extraordinarily violent and dangerous."
– Duke_Shambles
Unexpected Comfort
"I'll take a different angle on this instead of the usual horror stories, as violent and crazy as it was, there were a lot of good parts too. As someone that has had a pretty chaotic life, having a secure day to day life, employment and lots of trusted friends around me for a few years was really nice."
"There's a certain level of comfort that comes with being surrounded by murderers that you're actually friends with, new inmates come and go but you're tucked away in the long term unit where there's a 3 month waiting list to even apply to transfer in, it really was a very peaceful experience for me."
– Totallycasual
Based on the majority of what was shared here, it may seem those of us who have never served a sentence have wrongful impressions of life behind bars.
We just have to take their word for it.
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I know we're a culture full of over the top whiners.
We love to go on and on about all the things that bother us.
And all of the life impediments that stand in the way of our happiness.
But we need to dial it down a notch.
There is a difference between actual bodily harm and an inconvenience.
Redditorseesnawsnappywanted to mull over what aspects of life make us feel like actual pain but maybe we're exaggerating. They asked:
"What isn't torture but feels like it?"
I hated waiting tables. You have no idea the actual torture, ok not actual, but misery one must endure.
Dial Up
"Slow internet."
sev45day
"Slow internet : pretty salty"
"Connected but no internet : a n g r y"
Out of the Way!
"Traffic when you’re already late."
EdibleTurds
"Being stuck in traffic, and having a poop locked and loaded in the chamber. Stupid drivers wrecking all the time and having me prairie doggin' for an extra hour."
pineappledaddy
"Worst part for me is I don't have to poop until Im stuck in the car i get the urge before I leave and I try to go and it doesn't happen but when I'm the car without a bathroom within 50 miles it's like I've taken a laxative it's so terrible."
bknox1789
Extensions...
"Food delivery being over the estimated time."
leswhinin
"Or when the time keeps getting extended further and further and further and you have a 6 AM flight the next morning and then you check and it turns out the restaurant closed 2.5 hours ago but Doordash still says that a Dasher was waiting for an order and you have to give up and have sleep for dinner."
THROWRA302376
Midday Blues
"Having a 230 appointment the whole day is ruined."
LikelyGeoduck85
"I had one of those today! It was the only appt available this week, and fell right in the middle of an 8 hour shift. So I left and took my cat to the vet, brought her home, and went back to work. Honestly, not nearly as bad as if it was scheduled on an off day. Lucky to have a boss that understands pet needs, too."
verycoolfarts
If I hear that song again... I can't even think about it.
Swollen Glands
"I caught strep for the first time in my early twenties when working at a daycare/preschool, and it actually was torture. My throat was so swollen it felt like I was swallowing glass and every time I tried to swallow I couldn't really get all my saliva to go down so I was pretty sure I was just going to drown in my own spit."
Timely-Tea3099
It's Lost
"When you lose 5g and it kicks you back down to 4 and it won’t load a webpage even though 2 years ago it would’ve had it up in 2 seconds."
EggsAndBeerKegs
"Long story short with physics, it’s frequency vs power. Then providers think they need to upgrade some parts but not others. There’s a reason, but it’s a stupid reason."
hoosier268
"This makes me furious. How in the hell is having only 4g as slow as when we didn't have 4g at all years ago? Ridiculous."
FainOnFire
MOVE IT!!
"Being on one of those slow-moving people movers and stuck behind someone who is just standing there instead of walking."
bassistmuzikman
"I yelled 'get out of the way' this morning to a guy that was walking slow when a car was behind him and I need to get to where the car was coming from."
coolcrushkilla
Eternity
"Waiting at the doctor's office. (USA). They have the audacity to charge you a fee for being late and calling it a 'no-show' but damned if I've ever been to a 2pm appointment that actually began earlier than 2:30-2:45."
sexapotamus
"45 minutes is ok, in France we don't pay for doctors but it's possible to wait 2 or 3h after the original time of appointment."
Rabanaaash
"I remember having regular appointments for physical therapy that never started on time. The magazines in the waiting room were crap, so I started bringing a really long novel with me."
Annihilated_Matter
Forever
"Watching 2 unskippable 30 second ads, it's only a minute but it feels like an eternity."
Formal_Activity5040
Well there are worse things in life. We do whine a lot.
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America is in a terrible situation.
We are addicted to guns and nobody seems to care.
And nothing seems to get done.
RedditorSpecktakles88wanted to take a serious moment to ask:
"What, in your opinion, is a realistic solution to gun violence in the United States?"
I don't know what more there is to say on this topic. But let's try...
American society failing...
"A school shooting is the ugly culmination of multiple facets of established American society failing. A single 'solution' would mean a complete overhaul of countless modern systems."
Lupia_
"Indeed, the whole idea that there’s no, one solution, is what people who don’t really want this to be sorted out rely upon."
"Every time this sort of thing happens and people talk about solutions they demand you give them A solution, pretending to care and be engaged. Then they can easily point out the one you’ve suggested won’t fix the problem, make out that you’re eating everyone’s time and are stupid, and nothing changes."
Aloonatron
Swiss Cheese
"There's a model used in risk analysis called the swiss cheese model - in short, every tactic that you throw at a problem will be like a slice of swiss cheese. Each hole in the slice of cheese is an opportunity for the problem to still slip through. Some slices will have more holes in than others, but if you have enough slices stacked, you won't have any holes."
"So it's not just one solution that's needed - it's lots of solutions, all working together. Some may be less directly effective (such as restricting lobbying), some may be more directly effective (such as making background checks 100% required in all cases)."
Blythyvxr
Too Much Effort
"Well for starters, make sure your local police force isn't made up of a gang of cowards."
CannaPanda69
"How dare you expect police to waste their time stopping mass murder?!?! They have speeding tickets to write and drug kingpins to arrest for having a dimebag in their car!!!"
TheMadTitan2016
"Don't forget about stopping parents from going in to save the kids."
therealbeeblevrox
Complex Issues
"I get that this is the internet, and hence 5000 people have expressed a mostly non-expert opinion, but there are actual public health experts in gun violence, mental health, and injury prevention science that politicians should take policy direction from. Wicked problems require complex, systemic, and science-based solutions."
jamafam
Culture Shifts
"Everyone is arguing that it's a mental health issue, but there are people with mental health issues and crap healthcare all over the world and this STILL doesn't happen. I think the states needs a huge culture shift."
LuigiLoly
"And the vast majority of people who have mental health issues in the US are... not violent. I agree it's mainly a cultural problem. The government can't fix radicalization or the glorification of violence. Better gun laws can help too, but it's a cultural issue."
The_GREAT_Gremlin
Well those all sound good. And not at all new. Gimme more...
No Safety
"People realizing two very important facts that have become painfully clear in the last 4 years:"
"The Government does not care about you. They will not protect you or your children."
"Law Enforcement does not care about you. They will not protect you or your children."
"No one is coming to save you. Act accordingly."
SaltyPilgrim
From Afar...
"In NZ we have a massive mental health problem, yet mass shootings are extremely rare. We also have good gun control laws, with most people with guns using them for farming, hunting, animal population control or hobby shooting."
"Looking at the US from afar, there seems to be a very paranoid culture centred around a need to protect oneself at all times, and personally I think that’s a core issue. Why are people so scared? Addressing that issue would probably have a substantial effect."
grizznuggets
Media Issues
"Change the media culture, stop publishing names and pictures of shooters, increase mental health awareness and risk assessment when someone wants to own a firearm. Do actual background checks."
ThePantsMcFist
"There has been a major shift in reporting on mass shootings (at least on the local level) where the name of the shooter is reported in the immediate following of the event, and then not mentioned again. Everything afterwards is focused on the names of the victims and community reaction to the shootings. Both local stations I have worked for have implemented this method of reporting."
Hybrid_Johnny
Broken
"As someone on the outside looking in. I feel you have a broken nation and I have no idea how you can fix it. I don't know how well received this will be and I maybe wrong, but I feel like the corrupt elite in your nation are playing with our patriotic values for their own greed under the guise of national security. I mean. A few thousand Americans die in one day and you spend trillions of dollars and 2 decades to bomb impoverished nations, destabilise regions and directly and indirectly kill thousands across the 3rd world in the name of national security and the war on terror."
"Yet tens of thousands of Americans die each year to gun violence and nothing can be done. Is this not a national security issue. How much talent are you losing every year that could benefit both your country and the world if you would just give them a chance to live."
bushmanbob_82
Something to Cling to...
"We also need to give our children hope. They currently do not see a life ahead of them that is equal to or better than the one their parents lead. They see nothing but pain, strife and hopelessness. We need to show that we can give them a world that is as clean when they are adults as it is now. We need to show there will be a career waiting for them, that they will be able to afford housing and be a member of a healthy society. Hope is one critical part of the solution."
GamemasterJeff
We're in some troubled waters friends. We can fix this. We just have to want to.
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There are obvious signs of high intelligence.
People who can do the NY Times crossword in ink.
People who cure things.
People who know not to re-date a serial philanderer.
Those are signs of brain power.
But the lower end people, i.e, most of us, tend to be most subtle in the flag waving.
A lot of lower IQ folks are good at hiding the lack of intelligence.
It's a gift.
That's how you get a job in politics.
RedditorRecipeNew7219wanted to discuss the red flags to look out for when dealing with people who have "less than stellar" IQ scores. They asked:
"What’s a sign of extremely low intelligence?"
I'm afraid to start reading this. I may end up with more self loathing than I already have.
Hands Up
"Having your hand be bigger than your face."
RichFamiliar9715
"I just put my hand up to face to check lol."
SorryBooBoo
Equals...
"Equalling contrarianism with intelligence."
AustrianReaper
"Also, equalling contrarianism with critical reasoning and skepticism."
p0lisz
"A lot of people confuse rhetorical questioning and skepticism with critical thinking. Doubting information you don’t like is just the default and framing your doubts as questions is disingenuous."
Jeremy_Winn
Backfired
"My boyfriend was telling me about his new coworker today, who decided the best way to get acquainted with him was to tell him 'I have an IQ of 115' and then later 'only when someone is more intelligent than me in an opposing idea, I'll yield.'"
"So basically, if he doesn't like what you're saying, and you can't prove your IQ is higher than his, he can just ignore what you're saying. So intelligent."
ruckingroobydoodyroo
Knowledge is NOT power...
"Making strong opinions on topics you don't understand."
Key_River5489
"Worse when they don't want to admit that they don't know much about it. There are people who admit they are not the most knowledgeable about a topic but will still give their thought."
User Deleted
"I’m a lawyer. The same thing happens to me. Great example is the Johnny Depp trial."
"I’ll give my understanding of the law as well as the logistics of the way trial witness testimony works and people basically respond by saying she’s a liar and you shouldn’t support her. I was just explaining how trials work. I think many people watch movies about trials and they don’t realize that in real life they are pretty messy. There are always errors on both sides. Those attorneys are up all hours of the night prepping."
pedrojuanita
Positions
"Inability to take new information onboard and change your position on subjects."
Totallycasual
These are the people that haunt my dreams.
Proof
"Difficulty understanding analogies. Using anecdotes in an argument as if they prove something."
vellyr
Shut Up!
"Talking louder/over someone to win an argument."
Emergency_Pudding
"God this drives me nuts. I've worked with one woman for years and this is her M.O., all while espousing crap about nothing. She retires in 17 days and I cannot wait."
ThatWasNotMyName
"Or talking faster to win an argument."
sammysummer
Repetition
"Parroting the talking points without being able to discuss them, even in their most basic terms. That indicates that they have no knowledge, and no curiosity about the world."
hmmm_thought_pig
"This. Especially in politics, funny names and sayings might be ok on a sign in a protest or on a bumper sticker, but if you're using those in an actual argument I immediately assume you can't think for yourself."
zachtheperson
Cult like...
"People incapable of independent thinking and being unable to solve small problems by themselves."
Ompare
"My mother was 'book smart' and could learn just about anything that was in a book. But she couldn't logic her way out of a wet paper bag. She'd need a pamphlet with written instructions. Fell for every kooky scam product, MLMs, infomercials, weird diets, and even a cult. Tell her two truths and a lie, she'd believe all three without question."
OpheliaRainGalaxy
Not so wise...
"If I claim to be a wise man, it surely means that I don't know."
EhlersDanlosSucks
"A fool thinks himself wise. A wise man knows himself to be a fool."
AthenasApostle
Let's be honest. How many times did you see you on this list?
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