People Explain The Most Illegal Thing They've Ever Done By Mistake

Knowable

When we think of illegal activity, we think of it as a purposeful thing you undertake. Like very few people accidentally lead a life of crime right?

Wrong. Lots of us are unintentional criminals. Hell, you could be doing something illegal right now and not even know it...


One Reddit user asked:

What is the most illegal thing you have done 100% as an honest mistake?

We expected a whole bunch of "I walked out of the store with this in my cart and didn't realize it" posts but nope! Reddit is a weirdly overachieving collective criminal mastermind.

We're talking accidental drug smuggling.

We're talking "Oops I stole a whole car!"

We're talking "Hey neighbor so I tried to break into your house and accidentally set off your alarm - but I was breaking in to be nice and didn't realize I was breaking in, exactly... sooo..."

Yeah. Reddit is a hotbed of illegal-beagle kind of people ... and we love it.

Underage

Underage drinking, I was 16 and hanging out with some friends when I accidentally had ordered an alcoholic drink. Here in Mexico the legal age for drinking is 18.

- Jarf710

Transporting A Fugitive

Years ago my friend, whose license was suspended at the time, had me drive her car several states away to pick up her boyfriend and bring him back to our state to live with her. I didn't like the dude from the minute he got in the back seat, just gave me a bad vibe, but she had a history of dating guys I didn't like and I just sort of shrugged it off and drove back home.

a few weeks later I hear from her mom that he was arrested and extradited back to his home state— turns out he was a fugitive, had multiple warrants in multiple states, and federal warrants as well, and she was bringing him to our state because he didn't have any there. I had absolutely no idea.

- lasirenasatanica

A Travel Buddy

Accidentally smuggled drugs from Turkey to the Uk.

I was on holiday in Turkey. I'm a smoker and a girl on my cruise found a pack of cigarettes with a few left. She gave it to me and I popped it in my bag.

Travelled through Turkey all the way to London with multiple baggage checks. A few days later I open the pack of cigarettes and sitting in the bottom is a big lump of weed.

I'm not into weed so flushed it immediately!

- kabige

Target Facial Recognition

I once walked out of Target with a bag of unpaid groceries in my tote purse because I had dropped them in there thinking it was my shopping tote. Was very distracted when checking out and didn't realize until I was home.

That night Dr. Google taught me a ton about Target's facial recognition system and I haven't been back since.

- [reddit]

Geocaching

Giphy

Was geocaching with my significant other and we didn't realize the GPS had led us to private property. A guy working at the property thought we were two teenagers (we both look young) up to no good headed for the woods behind the building. We got the cops called on us and had to explain to the officer what we were doing and what geocaching was. For those that don't know, geocaching is basically the hiding of small containers by other people, sometimes with little trinkets inside, and finding them with clues and GPS coordinates.

The officer looked at us like we were crazy. She had never heard of it before and seemed like she didn't fully believe us. She said we were technically trespassing and we apologized explaining we didn't know and that normally geocaches are hidden in public areas. She also thought it was a bit ridiculous the cops were called instead of the guy just asking us what we were doing. We left without finding it.

- rocinovus

Uber 

I was an Uber driver for the summer. Got a request to drive a guy from Southern RI to Boston, a 2 and a half hour drive, for a pretty $250. Went to a Stop n Shop to pick this guy up (which was odd) and he had 2 suitcases and a duffel bag on him.

He got in, we exchanged pleasantries and we were on our way. After about 15 minutes of driving, I began to get a hint of some bud. Normal, a lot of passengers smell like that gas when they get in. But the more I drove, the stronger the smell got.


It got so bad, by the time I got to Boston, it smelled like someone had taken 5 blunts to the face while hotboxing the car... with the windows down. Like I had never been around the smell of weed this strong. But the passenger didn't seem to notice as he never even looked up from South Park on his phone.

Eventually, we got to his destination (a dilapidated house in the South end) and I asked him why it smelled so strongly of weed. He kind of got nervous and insisted he didn't know, quickly gathering his bags and ran into the house. He later tipped me $30 for the trip.

Now I don't want to say for certain, but I'm pretty sure this guy paid me $280 to move a very large amount of weed across state borders. This was about a year ago, and you still get a whiff of bud when you open the door to my car.

- shermstix

Kinder Smuggling

I came back from England with a bunch of Kinder Eggs. Didn't realize they were illegal to bring to the US.

Lady at customs asked if I had any food. I said no, because to me, kinder eggs aren't food, they're freaking candy. Didn't even connect the dots in my head. Felt pretty bad when I was talking to my friend after, who told them about his, and they made him destroy them all.

Political statement: Liberate Kinder Eggs! Kinder Surprise is not the same thing and is sh!t in comparison.

- MrGradySir

Selling Weed

I was 8 and instead of setting up a lemonade stand I sold what looked like weed.

I picked leaves off a backyard bush that I thought smelled good and put them in sandwich bags then rolled up the bags on the table to sell as potpourri. We lived in an iffy neighborhood and on a busy road.

So many cars honked and laughed. My mother came out horrified. Yeah, even selling fake weed is illegal.

- imbex

It Didn't Even Register

Blew past a school bus with its stop sign out

Happened during my early days of driving. I was driving down a multi-lane road in an unfamiliar area and I just didn't see it. Humongous yellow bus, bright red stop sign and it didn't even register until the driver slammed the horn as I passed.

Thank God I didn't hit anyone. I almost cried when I realized what happened. Helped me become a lot more aware as a driver after that.

- reejoy96

Trying To Be Too Nice

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I accidentally broke into a house, does that count? My sis and I were asked to grab the mail for some neighbors on vacation and leave it in the garage near the door. In their garage, they've got a coded key box thing, where you put in the code, the box opens, and there's a key inside. I happened to see them putting in the code before, because we were friends with their kids and hung out with them often, so I knew how to get the key.

I thought it'd be even nicer if we brought the mail inside, so I got the key and unlocked the door. Well it turns out they had an alarm system inside that I didn't know the code for. I opened the door, the alarm sounded, and I sprinted home and saw the police like 15 minutes later pulling up to their driveway. We weren't asked to help them again.

- cubs108144

Grocery Theft

Yesterday I walked out 🎯 with an entire grocery cart full of groceries and stuff that I didn't pay for.

I went to do check out and they had no registers open only The DIY self-check out. It was a major pain because I was doing a huge amount of shopping. I had to call over assistance three or four times because of barcodes not scanning or just missing. I had so many groceries that I had to move them off of the scale into another cart.

I guess I was not thinking clearly it has been extremely hot here and on top of that I was wearing a thick fabric mask and I think I was getting a little bit of a heat stroke. For some reason they didn't have any air conditioning in the checkout area.

So as I was moving groceries off the scale and into the other cart I just kept doing that on autopilot. Loaded up everything and just walked right out. I had loaded everything into my car and then I realized I didn't pay for it. I went back in and apologized and asked them if I could pay them hoping that they had saved some sort of ticket with my checkout. They didn't so I had to go back to my car and bring all the groceries back recheck everything else out and pay for it. I was super apologetic and they weren't angry at all In fact I think they were a little shocked that I came back. I think they had just written me off as gone.

- crinnaursa

Chips And A Well-Armed Class

My high school had a zero-tolerance for knives, medicine, scissors and such things. I was in English class and the teacher was trying to open a bag of chips and was failing. He looked at the class and asked if anyone had a way to open the chips.

Without thinking I pull out my pocket knife and hold it up for him to see. He looks up and shakes his head. There must have been a dozen hands raised with a knife in hand.

He walked up to me and took the knife. He opened his chips and then brought the knife back to me. I silently took it and not a word was said to anyone about his well-armed class.

- YeahIProbablyDidIt

I Was The Idiot

I didn't hear the ambulance everybody else was stopping for. I thought the person in front of me was being an idiot and I zoomed around the car at the intersection ... right in front of the ambulance!

I was the idiot.

- Rainlilly8

Accidental Car Theft

I accidentally stole a car once when I was younger.

My buddy/apartment neighbor dropped his car off while I was at work, so he could binge whatever game he was playing and not have to worry about picking me up. After work, I hopped in, drove home, dropped the keys through his mail slot, and went to bed.

In the morning, he banged on my door confused about where his car was, so I showed him.


What I hadn't realized the night before was that, while the car I took was the same make/model/color, the plates and bumper stickers were wrong, and it was missing the mountain of empty fast food bags he lovingly referred to as his "security system" (which was provably effective, but kinda gross).

We tried his key, and sure enough, it worked on the door and the ignition (this was before cheap cars came with keyfobs). He drove me back to work in the not-his-car-car, and we found his actual car sitting right where he'd parked it.

I went inside and called the police. I explained to the officers that showed up, we showed them the cars and how the key worked in both. Of course, the rightful owner had reported it stolen, so they got his info and he came down. We all had an awkward laugh about it, I gave the guy money for the gas I'd used, and he didn't press charges.

- Nadieestaaqui

Immigration

I stepped over a line rope in a foreign country's airport and accidentally skipped immigration.

- rmettle

Patriot Propane

Walked into a Ace hardware with a empty propane tank to refill. Apparently that is considered a act of terrorism from the Patriot Act. Scared the sht out of me people freaking out.

- cakefarts88

A Doorknob

As a child of maybe 8 years or so, I thought this doorknob looked super cool at Home Depot while hanging out with my dad. I don't remember taking it home but apparently I stole a doorknob and didn't realize it until I was cleaning my home the other day. Dad remembers specifically telling me I couldn't buy it too...

- SpiritofHyrule

Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or ":zipper_mouth_face:" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.

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