Sometimes the universe just conspires against you. You do not deserve it, you lack the ability to avoid it, and yet circumstances align in the worst way possible.
Often, that looks like a bad day. But there is another version of the conspiring cosmos: not a bad day, but an incriminating one.
There you are, minding your business, when, before you realize it's happened, everything around you seems to scream trouble. For some reason--whether its the possession of the wrong item at the wrong time or simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time--you have suddenly landed in a situation that, if caught, you could never explain to the authorities.
At the time, you feel complete dread and some frustration at the dynamics of the universe. But looking back, it's pretty hilarious.
A recent Reddit thread asked users to remember their most suddenly incriminating moments.
rickkyaa asked, "What's your 'if I get caught there's no explanation' story?"
Smart Move, Better Safe Than Sorry
"I was in a camp shower (stalls, not open) when an unaccompanied kid about four years old started crawling into my stall from below the door. I was telling him to scram, but he wasn't listening. It was only us in the showers at the time. I had no idea where his folks were."
"I scrambled to put my clothes on (still soaking wet) when it was clear this kid was bent on getting into my stall. I rinsed the soap out of my hair with my clothes on and then took the kid by the hand to find his parents."
"Had I been caught in the shower with a stranger's child I'd have had a very difficult time explaining it."
"I found his mom, frantic, about five minutes later. I guess the kid was looking for his dad who he heard was in the showers and he thought I was him."
Scary to Know it Worked
"Flew on a major airline with a razor blade hidden in my phone case."
"I was meaning to buy one to peel the window tint off of my car, but I found one at work in a drawer. I didn't have any way to safely carry it so I put it in my phone case behind my phone."
"I about died when I was on the beach and realized what I had done. Threw it in the trash right away before I forgot again."
"When visiting a friend, went straight in... to the wrong house (In their building people keep their doors open). Make myself a cup of tea, put on the TV, and wait on the sofa for them to return."
"Someone else comes in, says nothing, looks at me weird, and goes to the bedroom. Call up my friend to ask when they are coming."
"They are at their house. They come and pick me up."
The Great Potato Incident
"I was with friends at a local park late at night, like 2 or 3am. Parks close at 11 and a cop doing his drive through check of the park found me and my two friends sitting in a picnic area and we definitely were not supposed to be there."
"We had all gotten stoned and hatched a ridiculous plan to mess with our other friend. The cop approached us while we were laughing hysterically with a huge bag of potatoes in front of us while we drew sexually charged images on the potatoes with sharpie markers."
"It was rough trying to explain to him that the penis potatoes were supposed to be a practical joke. We were going to leave them all over our friends lawn. Somehow he was fine with that and told us to take our potatoes and go somewhere other than the park."
"I still remember that night fondly."
"My boss left his office door open one time. I was working late that night and went into his laptop to see if he had anything juicy. He did. He had a document with a title something like 'what is wrong with 99thusername?' It included a handy list of my character flaws."
"If I had gotten caught, there would have been absolutely no excuse!"
Steal First, Buy Later
"Stealing a truck and driving it home because the owner had agreed to sell it to me, but he was out of town and wanted me to move it before it got towed, but he had the keys and paperwork."
"It was a short drive, but nervous as hell in a very small cop-saturated town in a hot wired truck."
A Nude Escape
"Oh it was epic teenage stupidity."
"Girl invited me over to a small house party. I was the only guy (score!) and there was drinking (new to me). So we all got hammered. Then someone came up with the idea of strip football?"
"All I know is, I'm drunk as hell, all I got left on are my boxers, at least one of them girls was in full underwear, one was actually topless but jeans on."
"We were all f***ing living it up in the backyard when her parents came home unexpectedly and I literally ran, grabbed my jeans that had my wallet in it and just ran for my life from there. Sacrificing my shoes and other clothes in the name of stupidity."
"Going outside in full winter gear bundled up to my eyes in the middle of a hot summer night because I saw my dog sniffing something on the ground and was worried it was a dead animal and wanted to check..."
"...but I have OCD and am fixated on bats and an intense fear of being bitten by a bat so I covered every inch of myself in padded clothing. wouldn't be surprised if the neighbors saw me."
An Unlucky Contortionist
"I got razor burn on the back of my thigh, I have horrible eyesight so in order to see where the burns are I have to bring my face physically closer to the back of my thigh."
"Cut over to me, foot up behind my head as I rub lotion on the back of my thigh sitting in my office chair watching lilo and stitch."
"I was getting ready for a New Years Eve party and decided I needed to shave but I didn't have any aftershave or shaving cream, so I used a little bit of watered down vodka just to make sure everything was fresh. But I sort of gave off a vodka smell."
"Then I realized I needed to pick up drinks for the party so I went to the liquor store but I got kind of lost in a neighborhood because there were a lot of one way streets and I kept repeatedly passing a police car hanging out at a corner."
"I realized how suspicious I would look driving around on NYE smelling like vodka on my way to the liquor store."
"Luckily everything went fine and me and my friends partied in my basement and then Ubered to a bar."
"I can't quite remember the details but I recall stealing a smart car with about 10-12 other dudes at a party. We 'simply' picked it up and carried it to my buddy's garage."
"The next morning me and my buddy felt remorseful and told his neighbor, luckily nothing was no damage, just a few greasy hand prints."
Could've Confessed Just a Few Steps Away
"This feels like a confessional."
"I stole a bottle of 'Holy Water' out of the shipping box in the storage room at church , when I was an alter girl."
The Key Ingredients
"Sophomore year of high school i showed up with nothing in my backpack but whip cream, weed and handcuffs 3 days in a row."
"If those had happened to be random locker inspection days i don't know what i would have said."
"Once had my minivan driving through a conservative town in the hills."
"We had been doing some body paint art at my house and I needed to transport 5 models to the site 2 miles away where we would be shooting the photos for a high concept art piece."
"So it was me, and 5 naked people painted with graffiti that spoke to human failures and weaknesses."
"It occurred to me that it might be a really bad time to have an accident, get a ticket, or have the van stop working."
"I had a SUV filled with ducks and a couple chickens in a graveyard around midnight. Me and the other guy happened to have knives on us, but that was not related. Got busted by the cops, who threatened to charge us for stealing city property for taking the fowl from a nearby park, but they let us go."
"We had been waiting there while an accomplice infiltrated the girls' dorm. The plan was to release them into the dorm."
Hiding the Evidence
"I was a weird kid. I printed out erotic literature and hid it. I took it to the bathroom 'to read' and my mom wanted to know what was taking me so long."
"I ended up ripping it up into tiny pieces over the next 10 minutes and flushing it."
Whips and Stuff
"There was an explanation but it still felt sketchy. Bringing my riding crop to school." -- Kenns02
"I kept a bull whip in my locker for about a week and a half, used it once for some project. Oh and once to hit my friend in the hall, ended up in the principles office for that." -- astrorobot85
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Everything is too expensive.
That's pretty much the whole article, and I was expecting that when I started writing this.
What I wasn't expecting was for a commenter to explain how everything being expensive directly impacts the US political climate.
Long story short, we're kind of doomed.
Reddit user r4tzt4r asked:
"What has absolutely no real reason for being so expensive?"
That sounds like a nice innocent question. Maybe someone will finally talk about why I'm suddenly paying so much more for an empanada.
Or maybe someone will offer a nihilistic view of the sociopolitical climate and we'll all need a hug.
Maybe both! Let's get into it.
"I had a professor that was really against the college textbook industry and said it was a huge scam, so for the class I took with him he used a textbook that he wrote and provided a PDF version of it for free to all of us."
"My geography teacher wrote her own book and workbook."
"The workbook consist of free use blank maps of the world and makes up 1/4th of book. The other 3/4ths is a notebook. Best $150 dollars I've ever spent."
"Her 'book' is organized like a badly structured Wikipedia page and cost $200. Both are required."
"I had a professor that wrote his own textbook because he hated that the university’s recommended book was $600."
"He printed it through Amazon and sold them for cost - I think $40 or less. My class was the first to use it and we got to help him edit it."
"Unrelated, he died the next semester."
"He was definitely taken out by big text book."
"Canadian internet and mobile plans"
"I had this argument with someone on Reddit once haha. They didn’t believe me when I said that the Canadian mobile plans are straight up robbery."
"$160/month for mine :( "
"Recently moved to the UK for my studies after being stuck in Toronto during the better half of the pandemic."
"It's ludicrous how much they're charging."
"My UK phone plan cost nearly 1/5th of what I pay in Canada, and I get better perks too."
Paying For The Privilege Of Paying
"My apartment charges $25 to process online payments."
"I just get a cashiers check at the bank and deliver it by hand because I can't pay that much extra for absolutely no reason."
"So my apartment complex charges a $35 processing fee for online payments. BUT, if I walk a paper check to the front office that they have to bring to the bank, no fee."
"Guess who still pays in paper checks, this guy."
"We get charged $50 like what the f*ck is it doing that costs money?"
"Oh mine was $62 dollars a month lol"
"Mine charges 3%. Do the math."
"I just hand them a check in the office."
"Mine charges 95 if I pay through PayPal, my other option is to give them my bank account login info."
"In the last jurisdiction I rented in this was illegal: payments for rent could not themselves incur a payment, or indeed, any burden on the part of the tenant (or, e.g., drive across town to hand-deliver cash or a cheque)."
"What do the laws in your jurisdiction claim?"
"As an audiologist, I 100% agree!"
"Unfortunately the prices are the way they are due to two problems. One is most clinics 'bundle' services. This is mostly because insurance doesn’t like to pay for our testing or rehabilitation/counseling we provide."
"Two-if you’re a small clinic, the manufactures that make the hearing aids sell them at a higher price to you. For example, a small office might pay $1,500 for a pair of hearing aids. Whereas Costco, who can buy a lot more, only pays $100 for the same hearing aids."
"Its sucks because to become an audiologist you have to get a doctorate. You go through all that schooling just to end up 'selling' hearing aids nobody wants to buy from you because they can get it cheaper at a big box store."
"I wanted to help people, not be a sales person. One of the biggest reasons why I’m not practicing right now."
"Born in the US, but lived in two different countries. Can confirm that medication in the US is in many cases more than 300% of what you’d pay for elsewhere."
"Xyrem. It can be absolutely life-changing for people with narcolepsy. However, most insurance doesn't cover it, and the out-of-pocket cost is about $6k for a 1 month supply."
"Came here for this answer. No one pays the sticker price, but my insurance pays about $18k/month for this medication. It's nuts."
"It's free in U.K."
"I've stopped my seizure treatment because its $100/month with insurance and discount card from the pharmacist."
"It's not working well anyway and the doctor refuses to change it. Why pay $100 to still have seizures when I can pay $0 to still have seizures?"
Like Any Other Fast Food
"Panera is literally the only restaurant I deliberately avoid solely because of the prices. Last time I ate there it was like $40 for two people to eat f*cking sandwiches. Insane."
"I worked there for a week (quit because I hated it lol) and the worst part is everything is frozen and prepackaged just like any other fast food place, yet they act like it’s some “farm to table” “healthy artisanal” option."
"That’s how they justify the price. Absolutely bonkers."
"Houses. Long time homebuilder here:"
"Homes for purchase or rent- for humans to live in are TOO EXPENSIVE for no good reason."
"Artificial scarcity: lets talk materials- only a handful of MEGA manufacturers are producing the bulk of construction materials and softwood lumber. when there are only 2 or 3 mega suppliers and they raise rates at the same time due to "market forces" that is not illegal. when they lower prices to destroy competitors - that is also OK as long as they do not state that goal publicly."
"Additionally the MEGA wood producers- (Weyerhaeuser, Georgia Pacific, West Fraser Timber) hold politicians in their pocket. Lumber is the biggest line item cost on most builds after land."
"Trump raised the Tariff to 20% on Canadian imports, the WTO ruled against this move and it was lowered to 9%. Now Biden admin is raising it back up again despite the ruling."
"Shingles are made of gravel and oil- not much has changed in the last 50 years. They are better- no doubt- but no major change in cost to produce. Yet, cost of basic materials with mature, highly automated production continues to skyrocket- (Market forces- supply and demand)."
"Land- homes are mandated by code to be safe- that is good. They are also mandated by code and zoning to be bigger, and more expensive that makes sense for many people."Giphy
"Builders must work within this framework and deliver what they can profitably, which pretty much means build the biggest house possible because density rules and overheads imposed on home construction make building smaller less expensive homes not viable."
"It is hard to find a 'starter' home for under a quarter million dollars- no real reason for this."
"Codes are written by industry lobbyists- (sound familiar?) Once a new patented (safety, energy improvement) device is mature and ready for market, the owners of the patent will promote/ push through code changes REQUIRING their product be used on every single new home if possible. I am all for safe homes - but where does that push the market?"
"I am a builder for 30 years and strongly believe new houses are WAY better than old by just about every measure. However, manufacturing and material improvements we routinely see LOWERING costs of other durable goods do not apply due to the artificial scarcity keeping supply low and cost high."
"Demand will ALWAYS be there- everyone needs a home. A super clunky supply chain primarily focused on shielding from liability adds tons of cost for no reason."
"Too many ways to get sued if you are a home builder - so all employees are separate contractors, distributers are separate from manufactures. Even new home sales are often done by realtors independent from the builder, offering separation and legal defense from the endless expensive lawsuits that can result from no cause other than customer preference, customer neglect, neighbors or other issues not related to the builders performance."
"And Finally- Financing: You are encouraged to buy the biggest house you can afford as early on in life as possible because your home is your 'biggest investment.' "
"Banks will loan CRAAAAZY money and the government supports, promotes and funds this process in loaning as much as possible (Trillions) to a market of people determined to have a home and a stake in real estate."
"Is there NO other way to save money other than building equity in your home? A much smaller home with a larger investment portfolio is not a mainstream option. Federal policy views home ownership as a positive to be supported no matter the cost."
"PROFITABLE New small homes for under 100K could be and should be a thing in every American city. Homelessness would evaporate if there was an alternative other than putting people in motels."
"Honestly, I can't believe that nowhere in this post as of right now can EDUCATION be found."
"College doesn't have to be free, but recently the prices have gone through the roof and based on this post, it seems to have been normalized."
"I would argue that cheaper tuition is good for the economy as a whole. The more educated people are, the more likely they are to invent, improve, or otherwise contribute to society."
"Absolutely everybody getting a free university degree is not ideal from a value to society point of view, but the way it has become these days, it is going to cost the country in 20 or 30 years."
"Yes, I don’t think college should be for free but it shouldn’t cost as much as a house. It should be where you can still pay out of pocket for it."
By The People?
"Running for office in America."
"The cost to run a successful campaign in America for virtually any state level or higher political office is simply unattainable for the common person and prices out anyone but the ruling class of oligarchs and those with connections to it."
"Sure there examples of candidates outside the typical wealthy and ingrained political establishment, but they are the rare exception, not the rule."
"With US House races costing over $2 million and Senate races costing over $16 million the average person, no matter how well educated and how well qualified, is automatically eliminated without a vast amount of personal wealth or connections to the individuals, corporations, and parties that do hold that power."
"So the halls of congress and the seat of power is never filled with our best and brightest, but instead those with the wealth to attain that power and the conviction to maintain that status quo at virtually any cost to the people."
That certainly took a turn for the depressing there at the end, huh?
I mean... we were already feeling pretty poor but that last one ... ouch.
We need a nap—and a revolution, apparently?
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After years and years of television safety and survival episodes, you'd think everyone had a list of "what to do if..."
Alas, we have more learning.
Get out your pencils kids.
Let's do some safety training...
Redditor directinLA wanted to help us all compile a life list we should already have.
"What is a safety tip everyone should know about?"
Don't give dogs chocolate.
That is a LIFE #1.
At least for fur parents.
"Wear safety glasses when working. Wear safety gloves when working. Wear safety boots when working. Do not make excuses, one mistake can cost you your finger, eye, toe." ~ bstefanovicGiphy
"Sleep with your doors shut at night (helps prevent fire spread/smoke inhalation). Be able to crawl, blindfolded, out of every room in your house. Make sure everyone in your home knows what to do in the event of a fire."
"Where to meet afterwards, etc. If you have kids, explain to them that firefighters may look ‘scary’ in full turnout gear, but they can not be afraid of us. Friendly reminder while I have your attention; check the batteries in your smoke detector. They truly are life savers." ~ CharlieMike12
"Put toilet paper in your cars." ~ lodoyox5
"Just walk through a supermarket. There are literally 1000s of food products that are packaged in sturdy, sealed containers that will not deteriorate or spoil in the heat while stored in a car. Canned foods come to mind immediately."
"Get the products that are self opening with pull open can lids to eliminate the need to keep track of a can opener. Juice in large bottles that can be kept as juice or the bottle can become a water container. The list of potential emergency food and water is endless if just given a little thought." ~ memskeptic
"When you cut wood or metal, the chips fly faster than you are able to blink." ~ jesusSaidThat
"Here is a protip. Eye glass material counts. Some cheap eyewear will shatter or not stop anything.. The good ones will deform and are made of polycarbonate. I think 3M makes a good trustworthy one." ~ Specific-Layer
"If you you have a skin mole that has blurry edges, isn't symmetrical, is a weird shade of red, weeps fluids or acts like an open wound that won't heal, you might have skin cancer. Go to a doctor IMMEDIATELY. Melanoma kills fast." ~ vivav5Giphy
I worry about every skin blemish.
So now I have more mole worry.
"If you're treating a gunshot victim while waiting on an ambulance, the best thing you can do is apply constant pressure to the wound. Bind it if you can. But, whatever you do, absolutely do not remove bandages if they get too bloody. Just add more. Don't give the wound any chances to bleed out more than it already is." ~ bamece3Giphy
“It is better to correct an unsafe friend than to bury one." ~ LamarB
"I tried so hard to try and stop a friend from seeing if he could jump an entire flight of stairs. He almost launched me down it trying to push past me. I held him back a lot but he was determined and I wasn't going to get messed up on his account. He broke the crap out of his ankles." ~ khaominer
"As a life long Floridian, I see this all the time here, and else where in the news. In the event of a disaster, stay the hell away from downed power lines!! Don’t walk along the street with them, don’t drive your car over them, don’t take selfies with them. They’re thunder noodles and have been known to kill." ~ kowog1
"The gates on a railroad crossing are meant to break away when driven through. If your car ever stalls out on a crossing don't bother with 911, look for the blue sign posted on the crossing gates themselves and call that number. That number will get you in contact with the train dispatcher who can let oncoming trains know about it immediately." ~ M3T4LL1CA
"You cannot drink the waters from cactuses in emergency due to acidity and toxic alkaloids, which causes vomiting, diarrhea and mass dehydration especially when you're hungry or thirsty." ~ peachie_bongoGiphy
I always hated cacti.
I hope everyone has paid attention.
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There are just some people you come across in life, that when they speak, you just have to laugh and say... "Bless your heart!"
You either laugh, or move along and mind your business.
You can pretty much can tell reality is not involved in their everyday lives.
Redditor CindyQuicknFye wanted to hear about the people we've all encountered that left a bizarre impression.
"What did somebody say that made you think: 'This person is out of touch with reality?'"
I've worked in the hospitality industry and the acting/writing business.
So I don't know where to begin with this, except to say... "Bless their Hearts."
"Working for a super wealthy client who lived in the most expensive gated neighborhood in the country. A Walled community, filled with old money and old political families, and he was complaining about 'the elites' who the hell do you think you are ? Joe F**king 6 pack?" ~ stinkloadGiphy
"One of my relatives 'Joined the illuminati' on facebook... On. Facebook. He was really serious too and excited about it." ~ deadpuppet01
"I was 'invited to join the Illuminati' by a vegan raw food store I bought something from. I knew it was BS but wanted to show someone what it was so we could laugh about it. It sounded like some pyramid scheme that would 'have me vacationing in the alps with my investments' but it looked like my friend was considering it. :( " ~ Halfassedtrophywife
"I remember a while back I read a post about a man who refused to wipe his bum hole after number 2 because he believed no man should have anything touch him there.... I remember vividly thinking 'how out of touch with reality do you have to be to have such a belief?' I am still occasionally haunted by this stranger." ~ GlassBear1609
Isn't that a crime?'
"I'm a 911 operator and had a man call 911 because the internet at the hotel he was staying at got disconnected. I told him it was not a police issue and he would have to talk to the hotel staff and/or just wait for it to reboot. He responded, 'Not a police issue? This is criminal. If I unplugged someone's life support, isn't that a crime?'" ~ nocreamjustsugar
"Had a coworker that noticed an item’s tag said Made in Vietnam. She’s said 'Made in Vietnam? That’s a place? I thought it was a war!!'" ~ pookies10Giphy
And I bet you these people are allowed to operate vehicles unattended.
Life & Death
"'Nobody has ever died from rationing their insulin, nobody' - My FIL. That was an odd take of his, I'm still kinda puzzled over it. People have died doing almost anything. He didn't think they died from rationing something that costs hundreds of dollars per week though." ~ Adventurous_Bed_6151Giphy
"16 yo at DMV office getting her driver's license. Coworker asked her for ID, pulls out her phone and shows photos of her expired passport. Coworker said that's not acceptable. The girl turns around and hits her mom on the head and blames mom for no bringing in her IDs. Coworker yelled at the girl and said if you are old enough for a license, you are old enough to check online what IDs you needed to bring. 😐" ~ tintin9197
"My aunt is a bit into that. She's done really well for herself but has forgotten that not all of us are retired engineers who play the stock market for funsies part time. She suggested Thanksgiving at my place one year, and I had to remind her that I lived in a 2 bedroom apartment and inviting around 15 people there wasn't going to work." ~ BoilingHotCumshot
"There are a lot of older ugly apartment buildings near the house I grew up in. My friend at the time that lived a very privileged lifestyle, $200-300+ weekly weekend dinners with the family, timeshares over the place, skiing and snowboarding trips, etc. She was like why would anyone want to live in these apartments? I would never I was like, people that live there don't have a choice." ~ OnfiyA
Me. ME. MEE!!
"Former roommate declared, 'I'm an only child, that means I don't have to be nice if I don't want to.'" ~ StoneCold_SteveIrwinGiphy
Well none of us are perfect.
As long as know one is not violent, just nod and smile.
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A lot of what we think of as "common occurrences" most likely come through word of mouth.
Stories told from a friend of a friend who knew someone who has a guy who set them up with this extremely rare piece of jewelry that's totally authentic.
Until you find out it's not.
Reddit user, BroodyBatman, wanted to know what's rarer than we might have given it credit for when they asked:
"What’s something very rare that people think is very common?"
Going with the "word of mouth" idea, anecdotal stories, as well as "it happened to them so it could happen to you" type stories can be detrimental to your life, especially if you spend all day thinking it might happen to you.
No, no one is going to sue you for parking in their space.
Every Jewel Trade Everywhere Show Are Liars!
"Turquoise! I'm beginning study to be a jewelsmith and apparently most of the turquoise on the planet has already been mined and used. What we use today is a stone called howlite that can visually imitate it. If it's real it's likely hand-mined from the few small mines remaining that have some left. Real turquoise is very expensive as a result."
"Yep, same goes for real jade too. The real stuff is expensive and hard to find."
"Most cheap “jade” is aventurine, glass, resin, serpentine or some other kind of stone. A lot of jade is also injected with resin and dyed to get the clear, pale-green effect."
"I wanted to buy a jade bangle and did a ton of research and found that the real ones cost at least a few grand with the nice ones being tens of thousands, if not more."
"Also, pretty much all “jade” facial rollers are not real jade (most are either glass, resin or serpentine, which they like to call “Xiuyan Jade” because it is found in jade mines but isn’t real jade)."
You're Not Suing For What You Think You're Suing For
"Multimillion dollar personal inconvenience lawsuits."
"You’re not suing McD for millions because your fries were cold."
"And, many times, these lawsuits that are “personal inconvenience” are actually intense lawsuits disguised as inconvenience by the company."
"One example of this is the woman who sued McDonald’s for her coffee being too hot, which seems like an inconvenience, until you realize the coffee was so hot it burned her down to the bone."
Don't Do It For The Fame. Do It Because You Like It.
"Making it big on Youtube/Twitch"
"Yeah that one guy you watch who “only” has 100-200 viewers on twitch is actually in the top 1% or something lmao it’s crazy"
Medical marvels are just that, marvels.
They're rare occurrences that shouldn't be taken as an absolute certainty when you go visit a doctor.
"Anecdotal" does not equal "regularly happens to everyone."
If You Need It, It's Going To Be Rough
"Receiving CPR and surviving with good quality of life."
"One of my good friends had sudden cardiac arrest due to V-fib. Was completely healthy and normal and suddenly dropped dead. CPR saved her life and she is back to normal, albeit with a defibrillator now implanted in her chest. I think this is the best case scenario."
Movies Have You Thinking The Wrong Thing
"Only 3% of all epileptics are triggered by flashing lights, but it’s what most people think of when you mention seizures."
"To add to that, not all seizures are the kind where you fall down and flop around."
"My brother has severe epilepsy, and most of his seizures are just like he's really spaced out."
Not As Loud As You Might Think
"Tourette syndrome. Well Tourette is not that uncommon, but the swearing is the most extreme form and it's very uncommon"
"I've only met one person I know for sure was diagnosed with it. It was in middle school and also somewhat conveniently around the time Tourettes Guy was popular on YouTube, so that's the only reason I was aware Tourettes was a thing."
"However she just squeaked every few minutes, and after sitting behind her for a week or two I didn't even notice anymore. Thankfully she didn't get teased at all for it, and honestly my ADHD restless legs were probably a bigger distraction for anyone seated near us."
Our parents mean well, right?
Some of us grew up doing what they told us, avoiding dangers because the television told them there was danger to be avoided.
However, as the internet and peering through the veil of falsehood has shown us, there's no danger there.
Let's Get Together, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
"It seem having two loving parents that treated you right is rare when you speak to people"
"Definitely. When I was in University my step mom turned sour and began showing post-partum depression (what ever it’s called) and bi-polar disorder. Ruined the entire family."
"When I complained about fighting at home all my friends looked at me and said it was super normal for them. Blew me away how many of my friends I’ve known for years had parents constantly fighting and bickering."
"Granted my father raised my brother and I for a while by himself."
Oh No! They Slipped A Fully Loaded Glock Into My Kid's Candy!
"Intentionally tainted Halloween candy. Remember growing up some kids couldn't trick or treat because their parents feared psychos who poisoned the candy or slipped razor blades into the tootsie rolls or whatever? Yeah, as far as I can determine it's a myth and never happens. If it did, think about how easy it would be to trace and capture said person."
"Child abductions by strangers."
"Growing up in the 80s we were taught that if you were by yourself you were liable to be snatched up by a stranger. The reality is most abductions are by people the child knows. Stranger abductions make the news and often end tragically, but they’re relatively rare."
That Stuff Was Supposed To Be Everywhere
"As a kid who grew up in the 80’s - quicksand."
"Grew up in the 90s and same! But then I was hired at my current job and quicksand was actually included in my hazard training. It turns out there is actually some quicksand at some of my jobsites. All those hours of cartoons have prepared me for this!"
Obviously, keep your eyes up because there are real dangers out there.
However, don't fall for propaganda meant to make you fear something that has such a low likelihood of happening that getting struck by lightning feels more likely.
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