How necessary is it?
Some people need it.
Some are good with a once-and-a-blue-moon situation.
No matter your personal thoughts, when you're in a relationship it's a two-way street convo.
You have to be on the same page about intimacy or else it all blows up.
So...
Let's talk about sex baby.
Redditor Abysmal_2003 wanted to discuss sex and all the drama and fun it brings.
"How important is sex to you In a relationship?"
I love sex. And from experience I know it's important.
Toilet Thoughts
I Understand 2 Chainz GIF by MOST EXPENSIVESTGiphy"A wise man once told me 'Sex in a relationship is like a bathroom in a house. It's not why you're there, but if it disappears it can be an issue.'"
Fubai97b
Desire
"Sigh... Prostate cancer survivor here. Since I had my prostate removed to stave off cancer, I have no sexual desire (this is rare; many men have ED problems, but an unlucky few like me have no sexual desire at all). My wife has been very supportive (we are both in late 60's early 70's) and we still have plenty of cuddles and our memories to fall back on."
amerkanische_Frosch
Checkmate
"I think it's something for which you need checkpoints every so often. While at the beginning you may have the same drive things can change on a physical level (hormones, etc) that may pull you one way or another. Don't assume that just because you had the talk years ago and you feel the same way that it's the same on the other side as well."
FellcallerOmega
"bringing it up"
"Doesn't have to be a centerpiece but I should never have to beg for it."
its_Is
"This to be honest. Always felt like I was the one 'bringing it up' so to say. Pretty big dealbreaker. And before someone saying stuff about how I could do something different/I did something wrong: Shut up. You have no clue about any context."
KanadeKanashi
Not Everything
making love passionate kiss GIFGiphy"Sex isn't a super important part of a relationship until one of you isn't getting the sex you want to be getting. Then it can become very important."
ethnicbonsai
Clearly everyone is obsessed with sex. Big shock.
Same Page
Season One Love GIF by This Is UsGiphy"If it’s not important to you, you better make sure your partner feels the same or you are going to have a bad time."
lone_rutabaga
Human Intimacy
"I really don’t care at all. I used to think I wanted sex, but then I realized I just incredibly starved of human intimacy. Yes sex is an intimate thing but I’ll be just as happy curled up under a blanket with someone."
YUNGN0
"Agreed. Am dating someone who can't have sex right now for medical reasons... instead we just cuddled on the bed for a little bit. It was just as magical, if not more so."
Glamdring804
earth-shattering...
"I was someone who placed some importance on it before but not a ton. Then I met someone who really gave me an actual earth-shattering orgasm and that’s all she wrote. I’m still as attracted to him as I was when we first got together. Sex isn’t everything but when it’s good it really does take the relationship to another level."
SPtotheA
be-all-end-all...
"Pretty important. I love sex. It makes me feel closer to my partner. I love feeling desirable, vulnerable, loved, trusted, and just good. That being said, if my sexual partners decided they didn't want sex anymore for whatever reason, than our relationships wouldn't change for me. I'd miss the sex, and coping might be difficult initially. But as important as sex is, it's not the be-all-end-all when it comes to loving someone, and I'd still be grateful to have them in my life."
mother**queer
Desired
tired madonna GIFGiphy"For me the sex itself isn’t what’s important so much as the feeling of being desired. We don’t have to have sex often as long as I know I’m the only one you’re looking at in that way."
ImAshroom-69
Together
"Very important, it brings us so much closer."
Inside-Currency9002
"I was someone who placed some importance on it before but not a ton. Then I met someone who really gave me an actual earth-shattering orgasm and that’s all she wrote. I’m still as attracted to him as I was when we first got together. Sex isn’t everything but when it’s good it really does take the relationship to another level."
SPtotheA
80/20
"Crucial. My mom used to say when the sex is good it makes up 20% of a relationship, when the sex is bad it becomes 80% of the relationship."
WhiteTigressss
"Old Boomer Dude Here: She was right on point. My sex drive departed in my fifties and I don’t miss it, but my poor wife certainly does. The interesting thing is apart from that, I’m a pretty great husband. But the lack of intimacy is killing the marriage."
bdbdbokbuck
beyond a certain point...
"I'd put it as a requirement, but it's more like 'we need a certain amount of compatibility sexually for this relationship to work' rather than it being a primary determinant of how much I value the relationship. Like, beyond a certain point, if sexual compatibility is good enough, it doesn't matter if it's the best I've ever had or if we have it all the time. Other things are much more important. Nonetheless, if we couldn't even make each other happy sexually, there's no way I'd stay in that relationship."
d**gsucker
Desire
passion seduction GIFGiphy"I just want to be desired."
darlingmakinzie
"This. The actual act of sex is cool, but I want the desire. I want to be lusted after the same way I would lust at my partner."
xxDoublezeroxx
Bad Cuts
"For me it’s important because it makes me feel wanted. But I only want it if she wants it. Nothing worse than having it feel like it’s a chore or obligation for her. Once a month isn’t cutting it but I’ve tried everything to make things in her life easier that maybe she’d be interested. My self esteem is now at a zero and all I want is to feel wanted or desired."
TheHeed97015
Chores
"Very... sex to me isn't just getting my load off but it'd a actual 'connection' to me on a emotional level... being able to communicate with each other and have a good sex life because of it is just as important to me as something as simple like being able to share chores or being able to accept that you might disagree on things and that being more then okay."
6F1I
Partners
black and white love GIFGiphy"Not at all important. To me the emotional intimacy matters. For me a relationship is a safe space where we can support each other and be there for each other. Sex doesn't have to be a part of that. Of course, as long as both partners think that way, otherwise there's gonna be a problem."
Name-Forsaken
speaking from experience...
"There are a lot of great responses in this thread. Great question, but also I think the wrong focus. The right one is 'how important is sex in the relationship you have?' If the answer to the question you asked is more or less the same from both parties, then all is good."
"If this is a source of disconnect then it can be a major issue. Sex and intimacy are foundational to a true relationship, but whether or not it is a load bearing support depends on both partners not just you. (speaking from experience)."
waremi
Hold Me
"It wouldn’t really affect me to not have it. Cuddles on the other hand... I can’t imagine a relationship without them. They recharge me and fill me with love."
machinedog
Sex. Love it. Hate it. We need it or need to communicate our needs. At least now and again.
"What is the worst thing about being left-handed?"
Take Your Pick...But Mainly Scissors...
"The smudging is annoying."
"The right-handed desks suck."
"But it’s scissors, man."
"F*cking scissors."- Icy_Mortgage6654
Sucks The Joy Out Of Morning Coffee
"All the cute designs on mugs are only visible for right handed people."- jdon93
Baking Complications
"Measuring cup labels are on the other side when I use my left hand."- maninthemoonpie
Great British Baking Show GIF by PBSGiphyGood Penmanship Is Futile
"Fountain pens, and pencils."
"F*cking hate smudges."- deanfranz12
"When you write, you have to put your whole arm on the paper because you are actively pushing it."
"Whereas right handed people just have to apply a little force not to pull the paper."- iStealP
To Assume Makes An A** Out Of You And Me...
"When someone tries to teach you how to play guitar, line up a pool cue, shoot a bow and arrow, and they can’t because you’re left-handed."- aeowyn7
Dougie Payne Guitar GIF by TravisGiphyAt Least Some Progress Has Been Made...
"My grandad was left-handed."
"He went to a catholic school, this was in the 1930s/early 1940s UK, and the nuns would tie his left hand behind him and hit him until he wrote with his right hand."
"They said that it was a ‘sign of the devil’ if someone was left-handed."
"So cruel."- miz_moon
Might As Well Be Dying...
"Hearing the following words:"
"'Ohhh you're left handed!'"
"It becomes grating after the 1000th time of hearing it."- redbutterfly_78
In All Seriousness, It's Worse Than You Think...
"Left handed people aren't taught how to write as lefties, they are taught as if they are right handed."
"Pens tips are designed for right handed people, especially ballpoint and fountain pens."
"But even others work less efficiently for lefties."
"This is because we have to push the pen across the page, whereas they are pulling it."
"This causes frequent breaks in pencil tips, catching of nibs, and this ink/graphite will be rubbed against the lefties' hands, often ruining their writing."
"In addition, this pushing motion means there is pressure going into the hand of the lefty, trying to push the pen into their grip."
"As a result, they have to squeeze tightly."
"This reduces control of the pen, leading to bad handwriting and pain after even short periods."
"I know doing exams was awful for the lefties."
"Handwriting is for right handed people."
"Pretty obvious, you are taught a way to move your hand to get the shapes of letters, but lefties aren't taught the opposite."
"They are just left to figure it out, but these kids don't know what they are doing wrong."
"A lack of equipment for lefties, whether it is left handed scissors or desks or sharpeners."
"It may seem trivial, but these little things can make a leftie feel weird or like their can't figure out even the tiny little things that everyone else is getting so quickly."
"The effects:"
"This is a cause of lefties craning their wrists round so that they don't smudge and get a better pulling motion."
"As well as craning wrists, some may lean round, or massively rotate their page just so it isn't in the way, but no one taught them these solutions."
"Bad handwriting."
"Lack of confidence, which affects schoolwork and how the kid see his/herself."
"It may be the kid simply can't do what their classmates can do, despite trying his/her hardest."
"Uncomfortable positions causing pain in the neck, back and wrist."
"There are some, very small, organizations that have developed ways to properly teach left handed children how to sit and write comfortably."
"It usually involves angling the page slightly, but clockwise, whereas most lefties angle it anti-clockwise."
"I'd gladly volunteer my time to teach left-handed kids how to write."- untakenu
Left-handed people have to take the good and the bad much more than right-handed people.
However, considering Mark Twain, Albert Einstein and Ruth Bader Ginsburg were all left-handed, it seems that it's easy to make the most of the disadvantage.
"Who is the best sitcom character of all time?"
The Dad We All Wish We Had
"Hal from 'Malcolm in the Middle'."- TerriblyAverage1
malcolm in the middle ifc GIFGiphySomeone Get That Lady a Vodka Rocks... Or A Piece Of Toast...
"Lucille Bluth."
"She stole every scene she was in, which is both a testament to how well the character was written and Jessica Walter’s performance."- PobBrobert
"It's Always Sunny" When They're Around.
"Charlie Kelly!"- SuperDuperCatman
"Frank Reynolds."- Pumpkin-tits-NYC
it's always sunny sunnyfxx GIF by It's Always Sunny in PhiladelphiaGiphy"But He Already Did Something Today"...
"Titus Andromedon from 'Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt'."- cherry_blsm00
Especially When He Makes A "huge mistake"...
"Gob Bluth."- BrushGoodDar
Threatening Our Grasp On Reality
"Creed."
"Proof that less is more."
“'Somebody making soup?'”- AussieDuckMan
creed bratton television GIFGiphyThe Boss Of Our Dreams
"Captain Holt"- Cabbiecar1001
If Only For His Hair!
"Maurice Moss, 'IT Crowd'."- SalsaYogurt
One Only Hopes Our Future Will Involve Him
"Bender B. Rodriguez."
"Remember that scene in Kill Bill where Bill says Clark Kent is Superman's impression of humans?"
"Clark had to act like all the other humans in order to blend into human society."
"Now apply that logic to Bender."
"He was made by humans to be able to function and relate to people in a human world."
"The humans made him in their own image and he's the most self-centered, amoral, insecure, emotional train wreck on Earth."
"He is what we secretly fear about our own nature."- blakethegr8
swag futurama GIFGiphyOne could say it's their questionable grasp of reality that makes sitcoms so enjoyable.
If Will Truman were a real-life New York attorney, there's no way he would have been chronically single for seven years.
Far-fetched as some of their premises may be, however, our favorite sitcom characters can almost be viewed as the friends who never disappoint us.
As they're always guaranteed to make us laugh and put a smile on our faces.
Even when they break our hearts.
Seriously, how could Nathan do that to Ted Lasso?!?!?!
