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Life-Ruining Secrets

Life-Ruining Secrets

LEGO person completely taken apart

People Explain How An Accident Completely Changed Their Lives

These People Made HUGE Mistakes

These People Made HUGE Mistakes

A man and woman naked and snuggling

People Break Down The Most Unexpected Sexual Encounters They've Had

People Share Subtle Signs That Someone's Had A Rough Childhood

People Share Subtle Signs That Someone's Had A Rough Childhood

People Who Ghosted Their Former Life Reveal Why They Left

People Who Ghosted Their Former Life Reveal Why They Left

People Explain Which Things Can Really Break Someone Mentally

People Explain Which Things Can Really Break Someone Mentally

Therapy Nightmares

Therapy Nightmares

A red headed man holds a blue flower and seductively looks into the camera

Ways That People Have Been Accidentally Turned On By Their Friends

Single People Who Have Experienced 'Touch Hunger' Explain How They Cope With It

Single People Who Have Experienced 'Touch Hunger' Explain How They Cope With It

AKA 'Skin Hunger,' when you just need a HUG.

This apparently is a somewhat unique need. Not everyone grows sad, frustrated, or lost without physical contact. Lots of people actually avoid physical contact as much as possible.

But there are some folks out there that NEED it. And we're not talking sex. People like this need an arm on the shoulder, a normal hug, a slow dance.

And It's pretty upsetting how many of the people that need the contact get with people that avoid the contact. Like some perfect storm where everyone is bummed out.

u/aygross asked, Do you have "touch hunger" the need for non sexual hugs touch cuddles etc? How do you deal with it?

This is Incredibly Tender

Today I said to my coworker

"remember that time we hugged in a trailer and then never talked about it?"

He said he did. He was having a rough time and needed to cry on a shoulder of a friend.

I asked if we could do that again, and he agreed.

I told him it's just fu**ing hard, he told me he knows but it will get better.

I think he might be one of my best friends and I didn't even realize it.

u/TransformingDinosaur

A Heavy Secret

My love language is physical touch and I try hard not to get starved. School breaks are easier because I'm home with family. When I'm at school or with friends I wish I could just know how they feel about physical contact. I'm always ready to give someone a big hug. Sit as close to me as you want. My heart breaks thinking about people who so desperately need a hug. I wish it was more acceptable for us to just ask and give.

u/Faith_Sci-Fi_Hugs

All the Small Touches We Take for Granted

I was widowed nearly two years ago. I miss things like holding hands to help my husband cross the road, cutting his hair. The normal sort of things that you don't think about at the time. I cuddle my cat but it's nothing near the same even though it's nice. So I don't know how to cope really. Not helpful, I am 😐 sorry

u/paddyplaistow

Industrial Cuddlin'

I attended my first "cuddle therapist" yesterday. I was a little nervous about it at first. It was $100 an hour and I saw her for 2 hours.

I've been to massage therapists before. It was either a massage or this.

I paid a partial deposit. I found her on a cuddle website where she had gotten good reviews.

Yes, she was attractive. I already agreed to the guidelines when I made the booking. No bikini area touching. Wearing a t-shirt and shorts at a minimum (no 'just underwear'). Nothing sexual. No kissing.

I was worried about how I would feel afterwards. Would I feel lonely like when i do after having an orgasm? Or would I get attached to her?

She was wonderful. She gave great hugs and made me feel very comfortable. I had gone to her place and it was very cozy. She fit nicely into my arms. She had a great touch and her nails on my body felt nice. We traded spoon positions and other variations. We held hands. We talked and had a few things in common (we even went to college in the same city but at different times).

u/CreepyPhotographer

Fur Goes Far

I suppose so, but it isn't extreme. Having a pet to cuddle with was helpful when I was living alone. My suggestion would be to get a dog or cat. Obviously the dog would probably be easier to cuddle with, but cats are super comforting too. Cats will just get overstimulated a lot quicker than a dog.

u/Froggin/Bullfish_

Volunteer at an animal shelter! The animals there are probably more touch starved than you!!

u/PersistentHobbler

Seems Simple Enough

nope, I have a beagle.

Beagle owners will understand.

For those suffering from it get a beagle.

u/that_other_goat

This One is Just Very Very Sad

When you haven't had something for so long that you start to forget what it is then you are not even properly aware of it. You just feel that there is something missing constantly day to day and you learn to deal with it by distracting yourself with other things. It's when you remember exactly what you are missing that it gets properly bad. But you deal with it. You do what you do with everything else that you want or need but don't have. You take that feeling and bury it deep inside so that you can pretend it was never there.

u/katamuro

What are Friends For!

I hug all my friends. Constantly.

They need physical love and validation too, so it's a win for everyone.

u/boatbomber

So That's Why They Do That

This is a well known phenomenon among many elderly who live alone. Many people don't like giving them casual touches because they feel the elderly are icky somehow. But the elderly are people, too.

Ever talked to an elderly person you didn't know before and they put their hands on your forearm and talked for what seems like hours?

u/madeanotheraccount

A Well Timed Injury 

I was suffering really badly a few months ago. And then I tore a bunch of muscles in my chest and had to go to the Dr and get physical therapy. Honestly the physical pain was almost worth it. If it gets bad again though I think I might just opt for haircuts, massages, or manicures etc. I don't usually like being touched by someone I don't know very very well, but for some reason a professional setting makes it fine.

u/Amaculatum

Love Languages are Real

Absolutely. My husband and I have very little contact of any kind, so when we do touch, it feels awkward and unnatural. I just... deal with it. It hurts, and I've talked to him about it, but nothing has changed.

u/SKLover88

Hot Take

Someone gently caressing my back is sooo amazing. Could go for that over sex sometimes

u/snappyusername223

The Search Is On

I love psychical touch. Hugs are amazing, cuddling is amazing. It's hard not knowing who enjoys those as well. I hope I find a partner that enjoys it as much as I do.

u/ListofReddit

Use Denim for Best Results

When I was totally soaked fast by a super heavy rain it had kinda similar feeling to a hug. Maybe hop in the shower dressed?

u/ForbidReality

Some Legitimacy

I just heard about something called cuddle parties on NPR today. They start off with discussing consensual touching and are overseen by a professional entity. A professional cuddler I guess.

u/PBowler48

Yikes

Yes. My fix is keeping hug ready bodies in my freezer.

u/suicide_speedrun

A Tatted Up Hug

There are plenty of ways you can pay people to touch you in non sexual ways. Go get your hair cut, especially where they wash your hair and massage your scalp. Go get a massage from one of those Asian massage parlors, a half hour foot massage is usually pretty cheap and in my experience they also do your calves, shoulders, neck, and head as part of it. Another option is going for either a manicure or pedicure (treat yourself, do both) they almost always rub either your hands or your feet when they do it.

If you are feeling shy, insecure, or like that stuff isn't for your gender, just remember that a 300pb tattooed up dude on the internet said it's okay

u/nickhelix

From Your Site Articles
skin hunger

People Share Signs To Tell Whether A Friend Has A Good Marriage

Reddit user AnitaDickenme123 asked: 'What are some signs that your married friend doesn’t have a good marriage?'

A pair of wedding rings on the ground
Photo by Zoriana Stakhniv on Unsplash

No matter how good it might be, no relationship is 100% perfect 100% of the time.

On the contrary, there are some relationships that seem pretty doomed to fail, and it's disheartening how many signs we can spot of the relationship coming apart, perhaps even before the couple themselves is aware of it.

But as clear as a sign of trouble might be, it can feel impossible to talk to a loved one about it when it's about their relationship.

Redditor AnitaDeckenme123 asked:

"What are some signs that your married friend doesn't have a good marriage?"

All Joking Aside

"Talking s**t about their spouse, even if it’s in a joking way, is a clear sign to me. I went to a bachelor party with a bunch of guys I didn’t know and they spent the entire time b***hing about their wives, and they all sounded miserable."

- FunctionBuilt

Desperate to Hide the Truth

"They are withdrawn or secretive. If your friend is suddenly withdrawn or secretive, it may be a sign that they are having problems in their marriage."

- LiaRipsx

Weird Gestures to "Mark Their Territory"

"His hang glider now has a full-sized graphic of his spouse holding the cat on it. And he wasn't asked beforehand."

- BarcodeNinja

Hypothetical Divorces

"They talk about divorce hypothetically."

- LaximumEffort

"Okay, but what if, say, I am watching a lot of true crime murder shows, and he tells me we can just get a divorce instead of me killing him? Does that count? Lol (laughing out loud)."

- HopefulKitty

Detached Relationship

"When they don’t care what the other person is doing or where they are. Basically, two people who live separate lives and live like roommates."

- Lucyinthesky

"My friend never says anything bad about her husband, but she also doesn't speak about him much at all. They’ve been married less than a year, but she's said things like not caring what he's up to a couple of times, and it made me wonder if that was normal in marriage. It feels wrong."

- happinessinasong88

Fighting in Public

"I’ve known two different couples that off and on fought a lot around me at certain points, which isn’t obviously a great sign."

"The fighting stopped, but what I realized after a while that may be worse is that they didn’t interact at all unless absolutely necessary."

"I’m mostly oblivious, so it took my wife pointing it out to notice that both of these couples never really talk to each other besides mandatory stuff like plans or the kids."

"No casual conversations, no eye contact, no touching each other; literally no interaction that’s not necessary for the family to function."

"I suppose it’s better than fighting in public, but it’s kind of weird once you notice it."

- non_clever_username

Social Media Cover Stories

"If they're plastering social media with how HAPPY they are, and they're SO IN LOVE, and THEY'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER, that's a sure sign that things are in the process of going sideways."

- wilderlowerwolves

"This confuses me SO much. I have two close friends (women) who have been texting me nonstop about how s**tty their significant others are, like going OFF about them, long voice messages, etc."

"Then between messages, I will open Facebook and see they just made a post about how much they love their partner with a cute picture and tons of hearts and s**t."

"Like... WHAT. I have never called them out, but what the h**l?"

- perfectdrug659

"Gah, my BIL (Brother-in-Law) divorced after a short two-year marriage, and this was the prime indicator of knowing that they were doomed."

"They did this kissy cutesy schmoopy lovey-dovey thing in public, and the worse their relationship got, the more publicly showy they were about showing how in love they were. It was horrific to watch unfold."

- abqkat

Controlling and Jealous Behavior

"In my experience, going out with my old homie that was married, I couldn't ever post us out at the bar or anything. If his wife saw it, she’d blow her top apparently."

"We went out for my 23rd birthday a couple of years ago and merely his elbow was in the video of me sipping on whatever drink I had. In a panic, he urged that I delete it before his wife saw it for whatever reason."

"They’re divorced now."

- jailbreakthetesla_

Mean to Their Partner

"When their identity is the 'person who is mean to their spouse.'"

"I was at a party this weekend and there was a woman who just bad-mouthed her husband and talked about how nice it was to be away from him and the kids for the night. That’s like her shtick… she talks about how her kids and husband are s**tty. It’s such a gross personality, and it’s relatively common. It shouldn’t be common at all."

- SpacemanPete

Flirting Elsewhere

"They flirt a lot. A lot of unhappily married people I know are quick to flirt with anyone who seems interested because they want to feel that spark again."

- FlatulentDwarf

Constant Check-Ins

"When one of them is out and their spouse does not stop calling them."

- BansheeShriek

"I can't imagine living like that. I took a 10-day road trip to the beach alone, and all my husband asked of me was to keep my location turned on in case of an accident, and text a few times a day so he knew I was alive. That's trust."

- HopefulKitty

The Depression or Glow Up Era

"If they suddenly seem really down on themselves or stop taking care of themselves for seemingly no reason, If their outlook on relationships and/or marriage had changed since getting married, If they have nothing good to say about their partner or just don't talk about them..."

"The list goes on."

- Misspent_interlude

"Or reverse, they start glowing up. They lose weight, focus on appearance more, it means they're getting ready to split."

- Alternative-Post-937

Wishful Widows

"When my husband died, some friends admitted that they were a little jealous."

- emmymcd

"My ex-husband responded, 'One can only hope,' and looked at me when he heard someone’s wife died."

- foldinthecheese89

"I would never say this to someone, but I understand the sentiment. I absolutely wished my ex-husband dead a handful of times. It's one of those things where you can't leave because I had very little money of my own and staying meant living with abuse."

- IsThatBlueSoup

Jealous of Working Relationships

"It's bad when you avoid or feel guilty talking about how happy you are or about the nice and thoughtful things that your partner does because you know your friend can't relate."

- anemic_girlfriend

"Yikes. This is how I am with a friend group of mine. They’re always complaining about their husbands, and I stay silent. I don’t want to rub it in that I love my husband and he’s mostly awesome. In the past two years, one has gotten divorced and another is on her way there."

- Nonny70

"It gets weird for me when people are like, 'Must be nice to get away from the wife' if I'm on a work trip or something."

"I don't understand. I sleep better when my wife's next to me, I feel better about the day when I get to see her and talk to her, she makes me smile all the damn time."

"Everybody on the planet is a very distant second on my list of people I want to be around, and even though we do plenty of things separately I don't see time apart as some sort of reprieve from her presence."

- HereToTheSquatch

Wishing They Were Out

"I got married young and a lot of older guys gave me s**t for it, like they resented their wives for settling down too soon. It upsets me when men talk s**t about their wives. If you hate your wife, then leave, she’s probably better off without you."

"My wife is my best friend. Seven years later, our relationship only grows stronger over time. If you love someone and they love you back, be grateful for that and show it!"

- Apprehensive-Hall254

There are many ways to tell that a relationship is in a downward spiral, especially when the relationship is not our own.

But these accounts were intense and ones that we can only hope are less common.

signs of a breakup

People Reveal The Worst Health-Related Advice They've Ever Received

Doctor with arms crossed holding stethoscope
Sasun Bughdaryan/Unsplash

Whenever we feel like something isn't right about our bodies or we're suffering from some kind of medical issues, we want them taken care of straight away.

The problem with that is, that depending on whom we're getting information from, we tend to believe in the initial diagnosis or remedy because we trust the professional sources and we want quick solutions.

But do doctors and health specialists always know what they're talking about?

Unfortunately, that is not always the case.

Strangers online shared their medical horror stories when Redditor Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo asked:

"What is the worst health advice you've been given?"

Not doing further research into something that raises eyebrows can be a fatal mistake.

Turns Out It Was Brain Cancer

"i went cross eyed and my primary said 'could be a sinus thing, get some mucinex.'”

"turns out it was glioblastoma."

– Guy_Faux

"Wow, that's an absurdly sh**ty doctor. The same thing happened to my mother and it was quickly determined that it was stage 4 lung cancer. She made it about 3 months after that. She was 48 and I was 18 so the idea that any doctor would ignore that is infuriating to me."

– Frisky_Picker

Second Opinion Saves Lives

"My primary doctor kept telling me that nothing was wrong with my thyroid, and I was a hypochondriac."

"I had been told at 12 years old that I had thyroid issues and she told me that doctor was wrong. I had to see a whole other doctor to get a referral to the endocrinologist because she literally refused to refer me to one."

"The endocrinologist said, I had scarring all over my thyroid, I had Hashimoto’s, and my levels were horrible, and she didn’t know what the doctor was talking about. She said she was glad I advocated for myself."

– littlemybb

Tiny Grandchild

"I was not the recipient of this 'advice' but I had a coworker proudly say how small her new grandchild was when they were born and that her daughter smoked her whole pregnancy to try and have a smaller baby. This was in like 2010, not the 1960s for reference."

"ETA: smoked cigarettes. clarified since that can mean more than one thing."

– Emkems

Unforeseen Ailment​

"Was sick for a year in my late teens. Saw multiple specialists to find the cause. Experimented with diet. Saw a naturopath that did some ‘electric pulse test’ thing that apparently gave indicators of organ health. After a few visits, and months of eating the weirdest sh*t, the test said things were improving (including my gallbladder). Months went on but I was still quite sick. I eventually ended up in hospital and one of my specialists decided to take my appendix out on a whim to see if it might help. Turns out I had something called a ‘grumbling appendix’ and it completely fixed me. Funny thing is, while they were in there, they discovered I was born without a gallbladder."

– Ok_Ear_8848

These are not appropriate remedies.

That's Not How That Works

"When I had an urinary tract infection someone told me to wash my vagina with vinegar..."

– _Puke_Bucket_

"And maybe add some diced onions and tomatoes to make a refreshing Mediterranean salad."

– Bos_lost_ton

Pushing Through

"Just push through whenever you're sick. If you can get to a doctor's office for a doctor's certificate you can get to school/college/work."

– BoyMonday

"My childhood pediatrician told my parents that 'A sick child never smiles.'”

"I tend to laugh/smile when I’m nervous or uncomfortable to self regulate."

– pinotproblems

"A doctor once told my parents that a child who isn’t crying can’t really be hurt. Because of that, it took me days to convince my parents to take me to the doctor after I fell on my arm because I wasn’t crying. It turns out it was broken."

– slowsunslumber

"Ignoring" The Problem Isn't A Solution

"A friend of mine was in horrible pain, and was repeatedly told (by multiple doctors) that she should stop complaining and just get used to it because periods are painful and that’s the way it is."

"After being blown off for years, she finally got a doctor to take her pain seriously- and it turned out she had severe endometriosis. The surgeon said it was the worst case he had ever seen in his career, and was horrified that it had gotten so advanced with no one listening to her."

– sapphireblossoms

Choking On Blood

"The school nurse telling me to tilt my head back for a bloody nose. That was an awful experience."

– hypo-osmotic

"I do like doing this because when I cough up the blood I can pretend I’m in a period drama and I have tuberculosis."

– OrangeTree81

These Redditors discovered that all pain is not necessarily "normal."

The C-Word

"Doctor said certain pain is normal as you get older. Turns out it was cancer."

– REDDIT

"That's a fibrous strip of breast tissue, you're too young to have breast cancer."

"Delayed diagnosis by 6 months. I was 31."

– juniper_max

Thinking Twice About Back Pain

"I got from a doctor, 'everyone has back pain. There’s nothing wrong with you, just use a heating pad.' It was kidney stones."

– 5hrs4hrs3hrs2hrs1mor

"Yikes, I am so sorry."

"I had a kinda similar experience. I went to the doctor for a morning appointment to get some persistent, worsening back pain checked out. Doc asked me where my back pain was, looked me in the eyes and told me I was fine and must have just slept wrong. He shut me down when I tried to advocate for myself."

"That night, I was admitted to the ER due to the crippling pain I was in. Turns out I had a serious kidney infection that was turning septic."

"One of the ER staff who helped me told me if I had waited another 24 hours, my kidneys would have shut down and I very likely would have died from organ failure?!"

"I’ve been dismissed by doctors over and over again in my personal health journey, and it is so frustrating and scary, as they’ve dismissed me for 'being dramatic' when there’s actually something very serious going on with my body."

– Yarr0wFeather

Vitamin D Overdose

"If you have pale skin, get just a little sunburnt every day so that your skin will 'learn' to get a tan. That’s how everyone else does it."

"My Solar Keratosis skin cancers would beg to disagree."

– comfortablynumb15

As much as we want to believe our doctors when they give us a health assessment and assure us we're "fine," you should never ignore your inner voice telling you that something is not right.

Your conscience is there for a reason.

Even if a doctor tells you it's okay to ignore the problem, you should think twice about ignoring your gut feelings.

health

The Absolute Stupidest Things People Have Said With Complete Conviction

Woman speaking to an audience
Photo by Ben Moreland on Unsplash

When giving a speech and making an argument, the most effective way to reach other people or get your point across is to speak with conviction.

However, speaking with conviction doesn't always mean people are speaking the truth... or even coherently.

Redditor MonkeyGentleman420 was curious to hear more stories of ludicrous things people said with unwavering conviction, leading them to ask:

"What is the stupidest thing someone has told you with complete conviction?"

We Know How Often Birds Check Clocks...

'That we set the clocks forwards and backwards so the birds don’t get confused with their migration patterns."- alliecita410

Speaking From Experience?

"'Two people can breathe underwater forever if they have a hose'."

"The first person breathes in while the second breathes out, then the first person breathes out and the second person breathes in etc'."- PahoojyMan

Dream On...

"She said:'

"'If you are dream about falling and you hit the ground in your sleep you'll actually die'."

"'It's been proven'."

"I said 'If you die in your sleep, how can anyone know what you were dreaming?'"

"Ruined a favorite story of hers."

"Sorry."- FrankieMint

falling GIFGiphy

Because ALL Cops Ask For Your SSN Before Cuffing You...

"From a coworker: 'If you don't have a social security number then the government can't do anything to you'."

"I asked if that meant, if I didn't have an SSN then I could just go kill someone on the street and the government couldn't arrest me."

"'Yep', he said, 'if you don't have an SSN then they can't enforce any laws on you'."- AllAboutThePotatoes

Keep Them Away From Needles...

"A former coworker insisted that the body believes the ears are injuries, and we are all constantly trying to heal our own ears closed."

"The only thing keeping them open, you ask?"

"Ear wax."

"We worked in healthcare."- Reflection_Secure

Credit To the Visual Effects Designer

"A girl I worked with was convinced that every single mythological creature was real."

"I’ll never forget one of her claims."

“Think about it, every movie you done seen all those creatures and aliens and sh*t, all that’s real."

"Someone has to have actually seen it to come up with that!”

"Apparently there’s no such thing as the human imagination to her."

"So yes, transformers are real, Godzilla is real, Independence Day is real."

"This was a 20-year-old that said all of this."- Dragonborn83196

Unicorn GIF by MOODMANGiphy

In Theory... Still Wrong!

"That the speed of light wasn’t like an actual number, it was just a figure of speech."- sunbearimon·

Check The Date...

"Sunburn is not caused by the sun, it is actually caused by sunblock."

"If you don't use sunblock then you will never be burned."

"Sunburn was created by the sun cream industry to sell their products."

"Seems easily testable, why not lie on the beach all day in one position with no sun block and see what happens?"

"Make sure you fall asleep for maximum effect."

"You go bright red and then blister to the point that you get taken to hospital for a combination of sunstroke and the beginning of shock then spend the rest of the holiday indoors face down with regular application of creams and replacement paraffin patches on the burns."

"It puts a bit of a dampener on your 2 week break."

"Sunburn is mentioned in Livy's history of the second Punic war and others over 2000 years ago which is solid proof that the 'Big Sunscreen' claim is ridiculous."

"However it would be hand-waved away by a True Believer of big Sunscreen."- Magnus_40

Sonne Sunburn GIF by Mitteldeutscher RundfunkGiphy

Ignorance Is Not Always Bliss...

"A distant relative, recently retired, once told me that he was going to hire a gardener and a housekeeper because 'the government will give you a grant to pay for them now'."

"This was a few minutes after a lengthy rant about how the welfare state should be scrapped because only lazy people lose their jobs and need to claim benefits."

"The same relative, some years ago, also announced with absolute conviction that he was going to hire a neighbor as a cleaner because 'she won't have anything to do now her kids are grown up'."- Plantagenesta

The Price Of Never Looking Up!

"Pineapples aren't real."

"They're entirely manmade and do not exist in nature."- tricksterloki

ALWAYS CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR!!!

"My dad was experiencing end stage renal failure (was on dialysis at the time and has since had a transplant)."

"My best friend's boyfriend at the time looked at me dead in the eye and said he could reverse his condition with a vegan diet and that the only important organ in the body was the skin, so as long as you take good care of your skin, your other organs will function properly."

"Mind you, by the time my dad got on dialysis his kidneys were functioning at 11% and his SKIN WAS JUST FINE."- lyingintheleaves

But What Causes Cavities?

"I'm a dental hygienist."

"We had a patient come in with terrible teeth."

"They thought toothpaste caused cancer."- dilapidatedfungus

If Only...

"That women don't burp or fart, because only men have (the ability to pass) gas."

"Spoiler alert: he was horrified when I burped in front of him."- sequoia_summers

Guilt Is Easier When You Know It's Coming.

"First girlfriend was religious, and apparently it was okay that we had sex 'as long as she feels bad about it after'."

"Pre-planning regret was her loophole to do what she wanted."- Lone_Buck

season 2 famalam GIF by BBC ThreeGiphy

When people do speak with conviction, more often than not they firmly believed what they say.

So much so, that they have trouble believing the person brave enough to correct them.

In spite of the concrete evidence thrown in front of them...

conviction

People Explain Which Dating Red Flags Instantly Signal A Breakup

Picture of a pink heart tearing in two, hung off a red and white string, set against a black background
Kelly Sikkema/Unsplash

When you're in a relationship, it's important to stay alert.

Yes, you of course want to give in to love.

But when you start seeing red flags, be vigilant.

You're gut always knows more than you give it credit for.

Sometimes those flags are a sign that it's time to jump ship.

if you see them... run.

Redditor Shinfekta wanted to compare notes on why people would immediately end a relationship, so they asked:

"What red flag is an instant break up reason for you?"

The signs are always there, but I tend to put on blinders.

I need to do better.

A Big Deal

Illustration Text GIF by Jacqueline Jing LinGiphy

"Someone that casually says they've cheated. There's no way around that for me."

Kitchen-Bid-8235

"Or worse when they treat cheating as somehow noble."

2diceMisplaced

Hear Me!

"Wanting and demanding my attention but not reciprocating whatsoever."

Cranky_Windlass

"My ex. She would get pissed when she would talk to me about something while I was working and I wasn’t giving her my full attention. But every time I wanted to tell her something while she was doing nothing, she would get 'ADHD distracted' and completely ignore me or interrupt me to say something completely irrelevant."

ModestMustang

"I had a friend like this! he literally completely ignored me for 6 months and then blew up at me for not responding to him within an hour. Very strange."

KindBrilliant7879

Wronged

"Never admitting a mistake."

Curious-Force5819

"I know a total hottie that is notoriously known for not being able to admit he’s wrong, sucks because he’s a gem outside of this. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a fair and responsible person in general… but he 100% can’t admit he was wrong in banter or a light argument even when he realizes he realizes he’s wrong hahaha lost confidence in him ASAP."

Zomgirlxoxo

"This is a big one, even when these types of people apologize they still pass the blame. 'I'm sorry for my behavior but you made me really angry.'"

space_being135513

Never Again

"Unmanaged mental illness. Never again."

RuggedHamster

"I was with a girl that had that and I helped her through all of it and it was so hard to deal with it all but somehow I managed but when she felt better she just left me for her best friend’s ex and I was left with all that trauma because I loved her with all my heart and soul but she was just using me to feel better… and when she broke up with her best friend’s ex she came crawling back begging me to be with her again but it was too late.. the damage has already been done and I can’t do that again even though I still love her but I can’t tell her that... sorry for venting."

d7oomy998899

Afterthought

Sad Sponge Bob GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy

"If someone makes you feel alone, that you don't matter, or if you are a second choice on most of the occasions, you need to leave."

​Mycatsnameislegolas

Always know when to acknowledge your feelings.

And know when to depart.

Behavior

Andre Leon Talley Manners GIF by GIPHY NewsGiphy

"How they treat animals, children, elderly, handicapped, and service workers."

REDDIT

"A wise man once said: judge a person not by how they treat their equals, but by how they treat their inferiors."

Major-Ad148

Just Kidding

"Being mean as their 'thing' or 'just a joke.'"

netsbr

"'I'm just sassy!'" No, you're a bi*ch."

BansheeShriek

"I’m going to be honest, with certain friends I am absolutely ruthlessly mean, to the point that people are actually concerned it’s just bullying."

"However with strangers, I’m nothing like that. And the friends that I am meant to, they do the exact same thing back to me. We also know that if we need each other, then the meanness is dropped instantly, and it’s nothing but support and love."

5tr4nGe

​Well-Meaning

"Zero accountability for anything. Everything they do is absolutely justifiable because, well, they mean well."

Throw_thethrowaway

"Yeah, I was looking for this answer! And it’s true outside of romantic relationships also! I had to end a friendship over this exact behavior- it was never her fault, always the victim, and her hurtful behavior shouldn’t be addressed because she 'meant well…' but my feelings are still hurt so why don’t I matter?!"

helibear90

"This. Can't stand people who always play the victim or blame everyone else and never take accountability for what they do."

_5minutesalone

Boundaries

"This one may take a while, but I would break up if I notice them creeping over personal boundaries, and not stopping when I tell them about it."

"People cross each others' boundaries all the time. I'm happy to give the benefit of the doubt until it becomes apparent that they have no intention to respect me."

"For example, if I don't like tickles or being startled, don't do that. It's not about the tickling, it's about them respecting me. And if there's no respect, there's no relationship."

Ptatofrenchfry

Talk to Me

Sarah Jessica Parker Hbo GIF by DivorceGiphy

"If I'm hearing about a problem in our relationship from someone else rather than the partner. It shows huge trust issues."

"I've seen three divorces in my life, and they all were the result of the girl venting to her mother and her friends about issues she should have discussed with her husband."

michajlo

Communication is key.

If you're not talking to you're partner, why are they you're partner?

red flags