Top Stories

People That Work In Other Peoples' Homes Reveal The Worst Stuff They've Ever Seen

People That Work In Other Peoples' Homes Reveal The Worst Stuff They've Ever Seen

[rebelmouse-image 18351355 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

It's a rough business, going into other people's houses. Even if it is well-kept, it still might be very different than what you're used to. And if it isn't well kept... nothing can prepare you for the things you will be about to see.

Redditor SilverParty, perhaps a little too curious for her own good, asked:

People who have jobs where you go inside homes, what's the worst thing you've seen?

Here were some of the mortifying answers.

NOPE

[rebelmouse-image 18345950 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Heating company person here. We went into a home to install a new furnace, but turns out he needed a new heat run put into the bathroom upstairs. I should also mention that the dude has been without running water, electric and gas for about 2 years. Guess what we found piled up all over the bathroom floor? I honestly don't know how he was living there, but we called some people to get him the help he needed.

(It was poop.)

Beyond Words

[rebelmouse-image 18351356 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Used to clean up apartments after people had moved out / been evicted.

One apartment was Section 8 and the tennant who was receiving the Section 8 got cut off because she broke a bunch of the Section 8 rules. Aparently the last 6 months of her living there she had actually moved out and turned off services, but still let her kids live there (late teens to early 20's I think).

So the kids who lived there trashed the place, when I got there the floor was covered by 2 feet of trash / clothes / broken furniture. Food had been left to rot all over, and the place was filled with bugs and fleas and it smelled like a garbage dump.

The worst though was the bathroom. The water hadn't been on in a good long while, but they kept sh-tting in the toilet until it filled up. Then, when that had gotten full they sh-t into the bathtub and into 5 gallon buckets that they had left around the house.

All in all it was about 200 pounds of human sh-t in the tub. I had to bag it up in 1 pound bags, bag that bag, and then put no more than 5 bags in a sealable pail and take it to a special waste treatment site.

Second to that was the 5+ bedroom party house that a bunch of professional snow boarders had lived in for a year or two. They got evicted for not paying rent, or something like that, and they had thrashed the place before they left. The worst thing in that place was that there was a gap, maybe 3/4 of an inch, between a bathroom vanity and a piece of glass for the shower enclosure. Someone, or maybe all of them, decided that they were going to store their used condoms there, at least a 100 were stuck in there. It was gross, moldy, and eventually we had to rip out the vanity because that was the only way to ensure that it was clean.

The Cat

[rebelmouse-image 18351358 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Ex removals guy. I started moving a fridge to find a rotted piece of fish in a pool of cat piss at the back. I didn't like it.

Wading Through A Window

[rebelmouse-image 18351359 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I did remodels for a while. The worst one was a legitimate hoarder. That house was disgusting. She had to clear a path for us to get to the bathroom with our tools so we could work. Lots of cats too. The house smelled very strongly of cat piss. I'll never forget when I went to the back looking for the water hose. There was a pool filled with disgusting algae covered water and a dead cat floating in it. I was very happy when that job was over. At least her bathroom looked great.

Ammonia Pneumonia

[rebelmouse-image 18351360 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I used to clean carpets. We went to a double-wide trailer once that had about 20 cats inside, plus 3 dogs. I didn't see a single litterbox, and by the time we were done, the slate-gray carpet was almost white again. The ammonia smell inside about made me puke, but the old couple that lived there acted like nothing was wrong...

Leopard Print Mystery

[rebelmouse-image 18351361 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I used to work for a carpet cleaning company. Ive had some interesting stories but this one always takes the cake. We had this program where we hired special needs people part time. So we hire this new guy, bob. Bobs a rather large fella, not the fastest thinker but real nice to work with. Bob and I showed up to clean a couple rooms in this couples mansion. It was immaculate, two gay men in their 40s. Nevermind the paintings of half naked dudes all over the walls. So part of our job is to move furniture to clean under them. I had bob help move the bed, and this giant two foot leopard print veiny adult toy rolls out like a dead possum. Bob stares. No words spoken... I clean around it, kick it under the bed and move it back.

Bob and I finish the job and get in the van to leave. Bob turns to me and says, ' where did they get that leopards thing, and what are they gonna do with it?'

I still cannot tell this story without laughing.

The Carpet

[rebelmouse-image 18348506 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I used to clean carpets for a living and we were sent to a section 8 home that had recently had the electricity shut off. We went in to survey the situation and, after locating a flashlight, realized the six-foot high mound in the living room was all dirty diapers.

We did not clean that carpet.

A Bed Situation

[rebelmouse-image 18351362 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

This one is bad, not so much for its gross factor but rather the circumstances. I used to work in pest control in a major city and this included so low-income rentals. I was inspecting for bed bugs when sure enough, I found them in one of the units.

Being that this was a number of years ago, it was and probably still is standard practice to toss out the mattress entirely. Have you ever tried to tell someone who probably has no disposable income that they need to throw out their mattress and buy a new one?

That pretty much killed my day...

Doggone It

[rebelmouse-image 18351363 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I walked into a house where a family had two dogs that they'd trained to use those pee pads. But instead of throwing them out they just laid a new one on top.

The strench was bad, but the ammonia smell actually burned my nose. How people can go nose blind to that I'll never understand.

Had a hoarder once in a giant multi-million dollar home. I worked my way through a path to get upstairs and saw that the only accessible area was the master bed. And even then only a 2ft wide path. Down the hall I could just make out 6 bedrooms and probably a bathroom but crap was stacked up nearly to the ceiling making it completely inaccessable. The woman that owned the home said she hadn't been down to the end of the hall since the early 90s.

I've seen lots of hoarders. It usually catches me off guard because it can be any house or apartment. They can look completely normal from outside.

Unlivable

[rebelmouse-image 18351365 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

When I was in the Air Force I had to pull some first sergeant duty while the actual first sergeant was on leave. First sergeant was responsible for the morale and well being of the troops in the unit. We responded directly to the commander with any issues. We got a call to report to a troop's house in base housing. When we got there, CPS was outside and the cops were inside. When I got inside it was the most disgusting thing I had ever seen. Dog sh-t everywhere. On the floors, on the beds, counters. Piles of dirty clothes in the bedrooms. Dirty dishes piled up high. The troop was deployed to the Middle East, it was just his wife and kids in the house. The wife truly didn't understand what was wrong and why her kids were being taken away. Her husband got recalled from deployment to deal with it. I don't know what the final resolution was since the actual first sergeant came back and took over the case. I was happy to hand it over.

Defaulting

[rebelmouse-image 18348619 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I work in the restoration business, deal with insurance companies claims for water, fire, mold etc.. I had just started my job a month before I was sent to the worst house I've ever been in. There was a house that the bank took from someone because they defaulted on the mortgage. I was sent in to clean the house out, she was a hoarder. She had no running water and had not once taken her garbage bins to the curb. Not even kidding, they were the cleanest things on her property, two garbage bins that were spotless, not a spec of dirt inside them. The house however had 18" of garbage covering the WHOLE floor of the house. Pringle cans everywhere full of sh-t. A pile of used pads beside her bed, as high as my waist and about 4' in diameter. Tea bags piled from the top of the counter, to the bottom of the upper cabinets. A pile of used toilet paper taking up every bit of her bathtub and about 4 feet higher then the top of the tub. There was a spot under all of the garbage that she was burnt clothes and a big burn mark into her hardwood floor. Mouse sh-t everywhere and dead mice. It was also the middle of the summer when I had to go in, was about 25 - 30 degrees Celsius out over the 4 days I was there. We filled 2 MASSIVE dumpsters up with garbage. That was easily the worst 4 days of my life.

Paranoid Delivery

[rebelmouse-image 18351366 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I deliver food for my restaurant and one time I pulled up to the gate of this house. The resident told me to just come inside and deliver the food since she was wheel chair bound. Ok, cool. I get to the door and I discover a biometric finger print scanner that unlocks the door, along with a camera. I press the doorbell and the resident opens the door. I take the food to her in her living room and as I look around this lady has an electronic code lock installed on her fridge, pantry, and the backdoor to go outside is card-accessed only. The garage door is quadruple bolt locked and the windows have window-sized garage doors on the inside. I hurried the f-ck up outta there and told my manager to never put me on delivery runs again.

It's Been One Week Since You Looked At Me

[rebelmouse-image 18351367 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Not a job, but I moved out of my apartment and told the girl living there that I'd be back the next weekend to clean MY room and the common areas (living room & kitchen & bathroom) She was notoriously dirty and I wanted to make sure that I received my deposit back. I took the items that I paid for (she was incapable of shopping for items). I took the remaining toilet paper, leaving the partial roll, my shower curtain, my pans & plates & dishes, my food and the rest of my stuff.

I came back a week later to find

Rice covering the floor

She didn't have pots or pans, and instead of buying one, she attempted to cook using one of her plates. (By the evidence of the half melted plate on the stove with congealing food in it...why the stupid girl didn't use the microwave...) She had also melted a kettle to the back burner...I had to buy 2 replacement burners for the stove.

She stopped using the toilet when she ran out of toilet paper, left it unflushed and started using the bathtub. Bits and pieces still clinging to the back of it where the shower head wouldn't reach.

Plates stuck to the floor under the couch.

Snotty tissues covering her bed, so she was sleeping in her snot tissues. (She had flunked out of the graphic design program and took it rather hard)

Food IN the bed (crackers, pancakes, syrup were just some of the recognizable foods).

Food EVERYWHERE actually.

I found that she had been stashing her empty slim fast cans in her dresser.

There were just so many things to clean...it was gross.

Moldy Brains

[rebelmouse-image 18351368 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I used to work for a company that did fire, water, and mold clean ups. We got called to a mold clean up due to water damage, and these people were hoarders. Useless sh-t stacked to the ceiling. All of it had to get tossed due to being in contact with a really toxic form of mold. So once we reach the basement and we're tossing sh-t, we find TWO cat carcasses. The whole basement smelled terrible. We knew something was up, but we couldn't really put our finger on it until we found the decayed cats. The owners just shrugged it off. Disgusting people.

Phallic Consequences

[rebelmouse-image 18345360 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Friend is a realtor with a bunch of crazy stories. She said she had a client wanting to sell his house. No problem. My friend sends a coworker out to take pictures of the place. When the coworker shows up she says that it might be hard to use the pictures because the house was damn near covered in phalluses It was like a d-ck museum.

The Worst Way To Die

[rebelmouse-image 18351369 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Not a current job that I hold, but I used to be a Funeral Director and I had to go into someone's home who died and the police had to kick the door in and call us out.

It was the worst thing I have ever seen, she had rubbish everywhere and looked like she never chucked anything away. She had a cat and we couldn't see any litter tray anywhere, just Cat sh-t/piss in random corners and more hair on her clothes/furniture than on the cat likely (we never saw the Cat so I bet it was buried under all her rubbish).

The worst thing was how she died. She must have had some form of stomach cancer because she had died choking on her own poo as she vomited it up. What happens is that if you have an obstruction in the gut such as a tumour, sometimes it gets trapped and the body forces it upwards.

Litter Room

[rebelmouse-image 18347339 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

One of our clients had a water line breakage in their home and called in a claim. Our claims adjuster went out and then called us back immediately telling us he had just got done throwing up and we needed to get off this policy IMMEDIATELY.

It turns out they had converted a bedroom into a litter box room. Instead of using litter boxes, they just dumped new litter into the room on the floor. He said the litter was about 2 ft high, filled with excrement, and the whole house smelled so bad it made him sick. It was also a horder-esque type situation with piles and piles of "trash" everywhere.

We had to go out and investigate and his descriptive phone call didn't scratch the surface of how bad this home was.

How Sad

[rebelmouse-image 18346812 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

It's strange. Had a lot of jobs. Been in prob thousands of homes and I've forgotten almost all of them. Few stand out though. Yeah there are the roaches, spiders falling out of vents. The smells, the trash. People are pretty gross but the worst was sad.

Olderish lady who made me take off my shoes. Perfectly clean house and not a spec of dust. Plastic on the couches and not a thing out of place. I realize I needed to get in a room and told her and she immediately did the "no no it's terrible in there. It's my daughters room" and as always I'm like, no it's fine. I've seen it all and a messy kid isn't anything to be worried about it. After some prodding she finally let me in. Mattress was torn up and bloodstained. Holes in the walls and trash everywhere. The lady started crying and then she (mom) told me she (daughter) was an addict and she's (mom) tried redoing the room multiple times but she'd (daughter) always tears it up again.

Real sad.

Too Rich

[rebelmouse-image 18351371 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

TV repairman here. I've seen my fair share of nasty houses, a couple outright hoarders, etc.

But I'm going to go with the most memorable sign of money.

I was working on a bedroom TV and there were a couple maintenance or plumbing guys working in the bathroom attached to the room. The home owner was bumbling around, and at some point the plumber says to her "we just got a call and the new tub finally arrived from Italy. We can get it installed next week if we pull out the old one today, but you won't have a bath in the master bath over the weekend."

She goes "Paul, don't be ridiculous. We have nine other bathrooms in this house I think I'll survive a couple days."

It really wasn't the worst in any way, it was just absurd.

People Who Witnessed A Teacher Break Down In Tears Share Their Experiences

Reddit user throwthrowwthrowwww asked: 'Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?'

Apple on a stack of textbooks
Element5 Digital/Unsplash

Teachers are not only educators, they're also inspiring leaders.

The most memorable teachers are those who genuinely encourage young students to do their best so they can be empowered to pursue their dreams.

However, we tend to revere them to such a degree, we forget that they're people too with real emotions.

Curious to hear from strangers who witnessed a vulnerable moment from someone they were inspired by at an early age, Redditor throwthrowwthrowwww asked:

"Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?"

There's no bigger heartbreak than people who are struggling with illnesses or know of someone facing medical challenges.

Ailing Teacher

"One of our music instructors 7th-12th grade. She had a long ongoing battle with stage three/four cancer. She always did her best to try to have fun during our classes, like it was an escape for her because she loved music so much. Over 85% of the entire high school joined choir because of her. Her chemo and radiation treatments left her exhausted some days, though, and she would occasionally break down. In 2012, when her condition worsened, she would have to take more days off because the cancer had become so debilitating."

"We continued to practice our songs while she was gone, and I swear we would sometimes spend an hour on one small section of a song, ripping every note apart, and repeating the same words over and over until we couldn't mess it up. One of the final days in class with her, I remember we were rehearsing for our upcoming state competition, and we sounded damn good. Mid-song, she stopped conducting, closed her eyes, folded her hands, and listened as we continued singing for her. The energy and sound was so profound throughout the room, I can't find the words to describe it."

"After the song finished, we stood in a long, complete silence before she opened her eyes with tears streaming down her face. She wasn't able to go to our state competition with us, but we ended up placing that year. It wasn't first like we were hoping, but it was the highest the school had ever placed. She later passed away that same year. She was one of the strongest women I had ever met in my life."

– Top-Box2372

Losing A Student

"My high school Spanish teacher also taught some homebound students with medical issues."

"One day the vice principal came into our class and told Ms J that one of her homebound students had passed away from his cancer. She couldn't hold back the tears."

– que_he_hecho

Wise Toddler

"I’m a teacher, I cried in front of my toddlers when I got a call from the hospital telling me it was time to make the call as to whether to pull my dads life support. One of my toddlers came up to me while I was crying, put her hand on my cheek and said 'it’s ok to feel sad, it’s ok to cry,' then gave me a hug. I love my job."

– Cheekygirl97

Students witnessed the following teachers get emotional.

Thoughtful Sixth-Graders

"The class surprised him on teacher appreciation day. Someone brought pop, snacks etc. He was surprised. 6th grade teacher."

– Stephlynn1234

Appreciation Day

"Had a philosophy course in uni during covid. So the class was held on zoom. It wasn't teacher appreciation day, but it was the second to last lecture of the term and we all really enjoyed this prof (and because of him most of the class became friends). So we organized an appreciation thing for him."

"We all started class without our cameras on, which was unusual and made him question (he got sad actually). So one girl said 'before we start, we just really wanted to do something for YOU because you've done so much for us. I hope this is okay.' He gave us a confused look, and before he could say anything in response we all turned our cameras on and held up signs saying 'thank you professor [name]' and our green screen backgrounds were of his face lol. He laughed so hard but started crying. Told us how he wished we could do this in person and that he genuinely cared about all of us."

"He had a lot of health issues, the most prominent one being MS. Whenever he didn't start class on time we all got worried, and there were a few times where he cancelled altogether because he fell or something. He also had a cat, and we asked to see him just enough times that his cat learned what time our class was at and would climb up to see us and stay the whole class. It was cute. During the breaks he would email a link to play chess since he lived far from his family and couldn't visit and wanted the company. We organized a Christmas movie day with him over the Christmas break and he loved it. He retired after the following year because of his health, and I still wonder what he's doing now and if he's doing okay. I've been in uni for 5 years now and he is the only prof I've actually spoken to consistently and genuinely liked."

– Burnt_Your_Toast

Sad Literature

"5th grade teacher reading Where the Red Fern Grows out loud to the class. He shed some tears. He did every year."

– SnoBunny1982

"Our teacher read that book to us in 5th grade also. But when it got to that part, she elected me to read it and she left the room. Luckily I had read it before and knew what was coming, but it was still rough."

– MIBariSax81

The Private Life Of An English Teacher

"I forgot his name, but he was one of my favored teachers in high school. He taught English."

"During class, he was called out to talk to some members of the school administration and a few proctors. It took several minutes. But he returned, taught as much of the class as he could, and then just walked over to his desk and started crying. Whimpering. He then left."

"He just found out his wife, who had also been a teacher, was having an affair with one of the female students. We didn't find out that specific fact until later on though."

– Typical_Samaritan

Some students, however, can force a teacher to realize they're in the wrong profession.

Bad Attitude

"Student that had behavior issues and a hard time maintaining emotional regulation threw his recorder (the instrument) at the music teacher and it snapped in half. He then threw his desk in her direction and walked out. This was 3rd grade, and all she had asked him to do was listen to the song we were learning. She quit the next week after almost 30 years of teaching."

– Last_Tuesdays_Beans

Bullying The Substitute

"Ms. Hanlon... Substitute teacher, I still think about her and hope she's doing well. She was posted as the teacher when the usual teachers were off sick. Absolutely zero respect was given to her and the class knew if we had Ms. Hanlon it was just an extended lunch, we could just mess around and act like animals for the whole lesson."

"She had physical conditions like a dent in her forehead and a gravvely voice which prevented her from being able to raise her voice to tell us to be quiet. So the kids would all do Hunchback of Notre Dame impressions, spitballs through straws and do the 'coughing game' where they would just cough through whatever she was trying to say."

"Even as a kid I felt kinda awful after we'd essentially broken her and she'd just come in not even say hello and pull open a book for the hour and sometimes cry into it. I weirdly still think about her randomly once or twice a month, I hope she moved on to way better things. School children really have no filter at all."

– PNCL

Absolutely Zero Respect

"Substitute teacher in Jr High must be among the world's worse jobs. 8th grade we had a sub that demanded and got no respect. Kids would throw stuff at her etc. She left the classroom crying then the vice principal, who was not to be messed with, came in and took over."

– woolash

Major Mockery

"I had a substitute teacher named Mr. Crane who looked exactly like Ichabod Crane from the old cartoon. Some kids in the class bullied him relentlessly for this and he just kind of broke down one day. Poor guy."

– backflip10019

In seventh grade, I witnessed a classmate talk back to our homeroom teacher and saying very inappropriate, bullish things to her in front of the whole class.

But that didn't make her cry.

What made her tear up was when another student defended her and yelled at the bullying student for being out of line.

It can be a pleasant and exciting surprise to see a friend or family member show up on the evening news.

Particularly if it is a story showcasing their accomplishments or allowing them to let their voice be heard on an important issue.

Of course, showing up on the news isn't always a joyous occasion.

Indeed, some people tune in to find their friends and family on the news for reasons they might hope people will eventually forget down the line.

Redditor Miguenzo was eager to hear stories of a loved one making the evening news for less than brag-worthy stories, leading them to ask:

"What’s the dumbest reason somebody you know landed on the 6 o’clock news?"

15 Minutes, Or Four Seconds, Of Fame...

"Years back, there was a college scholarship scam going on here."

"These companies would go to high schools and do a presentation, and grift parents into paying a large sum for the company to help get a scholarship."

"My mom took one look at this and was like, 'this is a scam'."

"My uncle bought it hook, line and sinker and paid up."

"And received absolutely nothing."

"So he calls our news program and they do a feature with this company in their 'hall of shame.'"

"My uncle was absolutely THRILLED."

"'They interviewed me for 4 hours!'"

"'It's going to be huge!'"

"We all sit around the TV."

"It's February 2000."

"Boom, there's my uncle!"

"They do the lead-in..and then, there's my uncle saying..."

"'They said, uh, sue 'em'."

"My uncle is screaming."

"'What the Hell?! They were at my house for 4 hours!'"

"We still have it on VHS somewhere."

"My uncle's star moment over in seconds."- JKW1988

Episode 19 News GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

Preserved For Posterity...

"My college roommate got stuck in an infant swing at a public park and firefighters had to use some type of Jaws of Life contraption to cut the swing down and cut her out of it."- Nocomt

Oops!

"I know a guy who was interviewed on camera up in the mountains where there was a forest fire."

"He had been up there fishing with his girlfriend."

"He was married."- Fezig

Close Call

"Dude was swimming laps in a lake after dinner (i.e., around sunset)."

"Predictably, he got bit by an alligator."

"I saw him on the news, shirtless in true Floridaman fashion, with a little bandage over each tooth mark."

"The bandages made a dotted line around his shoulder and chest in the shape of an alligator's mouth, like he was in a cartoon or something."- BigRedRobotNinja

Tiere Bis Unters Dach Swimming GIF by SWR KindernetzGiphy

Unpaid Extra

"There was a park nearby that had no drainage and was bowl shaped."

"So if it rained hard, this baseball park/ football field turned into a mini lake."

"It rained a lot one day and the news did a story just showing how much it rained, and in the background behind the news-woman, from out of frame you see my friend rowing past her in a kayak."- hook_killed_pan

Right Place At The Right Time?

"A fight broke out at a HS football game."

"Turned into a huge brouhaha.'

"They intervened this dumba** friend of mine on the local news, the only bit that made it into the broadcast was him saying 'For the first time in my life I was happy to see cops!'"- KneeDragr

Awww...

"Marrying their pet goldfish in an underwater ceremony, complete with a wedding gown and guests in scuba gear."- Candies-For-You

Illustration Swimming GIF by Ordinary NadeeGiphy

Strike!

'A childhood friend’s dad embezzled money from the local Little League team."- Key-Zebra-4125

How Did He Even Make It To The Freezer?

"An ex boyfriend of my best friend’s sister ended up on the news for breaking into a Checkers through the drive through window and locking himself in the freezer until the cops arrived and arrested him."- pineapple3712·

Ice Cream Snack GIF by My/Mochi Ice CreamGiphy

Setting An Example...

"I got filmed and aired sticking a swab up my nose at drive thru covid testing."

"I had just declined to be interviewed at my car because I was afraid of getting someone sick."

"Test was negative, and my sister got a new pic for my contact profile on her phone."- idiotsavant419

Criminals Don't Ususally Wait In The Check Out Line...

"My friend was going to target with his mom to buy a tv."

"They stopped at Starbucks in the store."

"When the worker asked what the wanted he said “'he money in the register see' like an old timey gangster, then laughed ordered and payed for their coffee and went into target."

"While they were pushing their cart with a tv in it to the check out line the swat team surrounded them and arrested him for armed robbery.. was on the news."

"Got charged and everything."

"The first hearing the barista could not point him out and the judge threw out the case."- MACHOmanJITSU

Returning To The Scene Of The Crime...

"A guy from my high school stole Michael Jackson's glove from the Motown Museum in Detroit MI in early 90s."

"He returned it."

"I knew it had to be him, and yep, it was."

"I remembered him because he dressed like Michael Jackson every single day of school for years."

"He did it really well, too."

"He also didn't talk much."

"So, I was surprised to see him talking to a TV reporter about it."

"I hope he's doing well."- ATK80k

Animated GIFGiphy

Some people crave their 15 minutes of fame and embrace it however it may come.

Others only hope that no one they knew happened to be watching their local news that night...

Even though they know deep down that all their friends have it on their DVR and are never planning to erase it...


People say the darndest things after -- and sometimes during -- lovemaking.

Maybe it's the euphoria.

Maybe it's the adrenaline.

Maybe it's the tequila.

It's always good to have a kind-hearted joke on hand or a generic compliment.

Or maybe just grab your belongings and skedaddle.

Redditor ella-es-julia wanted to hear about the craziest pillow talk stories, so they asked:

"Men of Reddit: What's the weirdest thing a girl said to you after sex?"

The weirdest I ever got was... "What city am I in again?"

Geography matters.

Morbid Much?

In Bed Home GIFGiphy

"Met girl, went on date, brought girl home, had the sex, finished the sex, laying there she says 'What would you do if I died right now?' and demanded an actual answer."

Vixxay

Meow

"Not to me, but as she walked over to the bathroom after the deed, she said 'I just did your owner' to my cat. Sexiest thing that ever happened to me."

shlanky369

"My Fiancé and I were about to start going at it when the cat appeared from under the bed and stared at me. I went, 'Babe the cat is here. I don't like how he's staring at my boobs."

"Fiancé grabbed the cat and yeeted him into the hallway with the phrase, 'Get out you weird pervert.'"

"The cat proceeded to (without his claws) smack the door over and over again while screaming for a few minutes straight. Pervert."

Trumpet6789

POP!

"'I need you to take me to the hospital. Something is now bleeding and hurts.'"

"Turns out her ovarian cyst popped. We're still together with the running joke of sex so good it put her in the ER."

DasBatt

"Ah ah ah, 2 hemorrhagic cysts ruptured, I was bleeding internally, but only a little bit. I'm still impressed by how quickly you went from a naked sex stupor to being ready and carrying me to the car. Good times."

"In the ER when they asked me what happened all I could do was shout 'we were f**kin!' through my tears. That memory still makes me laugh."

Straystar-626

Damn it's Good

"We were going at it for some time then her face went instantly from 'damn it's good' to full-on crying. I stop, ask her what's wrong and she tells me 'I can't cheat on my boyfriend, it is wrong.'"

"So this is when I learned that the girl that I met on a dating website and that I started seeing 3 weeks before and that she told me she was single had a boyfriend for over 5 years. Got her to talk more, and she told me she was on the dating website to see if there were guys better than her boyfriend so she could end up with someone better."

"This was like 20 years ago, a coworker I have right now knows her (his girlfriend is like a distant relative of hers) and I learned she had 5 different boyfriends since then, cheated on all of them except the last one (for now). She was also a cam model in secret, one of the boyfriends was a high-paying customer."

draftstone

A Binding Contract

"'Pleasure doing sex business with ya.' We then shook hands."

"Still together 5 years later!"

Tatarstan

It's nice when people who have great sex make great partners.

And it all starts with a handshake.

Sleep on It

“'I don’t usually say this but, yeah, you can stay.'"

lennyukdeejay

"Did you high-five after that? Seems like that statement called for it."

EvilNinjaX24

"This is the best one."

TomKhatacourtmayfind

Tiny Dancer

"Not really weird but I slept with this girl while backpacking Asia, she was also a backpacker. After a bit of chillin'/talking, I got up to get dressed, she looked at my flaccid manhood and said 'You're quite shy when you're not excited.' I thought it was hilarious."

fleetwoodsackk

"That's a much better way to put it. My wife, when we were just dating and had moved in together and eventually saw it flaccid just said 'Aww, it's so little.' Thanks, hun, exactly what every guy wants to hear."

striker180

Fine!

"She said 'If I get pregnant I'm keeping it.' I was dumbfounded and when I didn't respond quickly enough she got really agitated like I had hurt her feelings and yelled 'Fine! You don't have to be involved if you don't want to!'"

"We had just met that night. My condom use skyrocketed after that night."

Fullyme

"When I was a poverty-stricken college student I was banging a girl who said, 'If you get me pregnant I’ll take you for everything you own.' I said, 'All I own is my bicycle. You want that?'”

OrwellWasRight101

Amen

"Best weird compliment I ever got was 'Damn boy, you f**k like the Devil!'"

"I married her, we still goin' at it."

BeBearAwareOK

Well, these certainly created some lasting relationships... or hilarious tales to tell their friends.

Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.

woman in black pants and red tank top
Jakayla Toney on Unsplash

Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.

Accepting compliments can be much harder.

Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.

But we just need to say thank you—even if the compliment is a little odd.

Keep reading...Show less