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Home Depot Paint Mixers Share Their Funniest Experiences Matching Colors

Home Depot Paint Mixers Share Their Funniest Experiences Matching Colors
Image by naobim from Pixabay

I hate painting. I swear I'd rather eat uncooked liver or scrub a latrine with a toothbrush before I pick up a rolling pin and start painting walls.

I can never get it right, and the amount of coats you have to put on never seems to end. I cry when I have to do it.

And the stress of it all starts at the paint store. Those Home Depot people act like their artists and I'm an idiot. Ok, maybe they're right.

I can never figure out how to match the color or even get the perfect new color that's in my mind. So I doth my workman's cap to the HP counter crew.

Redditor u/PhantomHeroine wanted all the people with color mixing skills to share some interesting tales by asking:

Home Depot paint mixers of Reddit, what is the weirdest thing you've had to color match?

I've brought in previous paint chips to try and match. That is the extent of my ability in paint coordination... crusty, old, dirty chips. What else is there to bring to the paint counter? Let's find out...

Meow Mix

cat turning GIFGiphy

"My manager color matched a cat once. Mostly people just try to have you match splinters or things that have multiple color tones into just a "general vibe."

- TarotFox

In the Eyes

"I matched sharpies, microscopic flecks of paint people scraped off their walls, a woman's teal underwear, and more. Maybe the weirdest one was matching a guy's girlfriend's iris color. He wanted to paint something the color of her eyes, so he brought in a close-up photo of her. It was difficult because an iris isn't just one solid colour, but it was fun and he left happy with this kind of smoky blue."

- jojawhi

Crazy Brights?

"A guy came in once and wanted Asylum Yellow for his attic room. He said he saw it once and could we find it? Ended-up calling the 1-800 number and the woman said there was no color. After a while, she found it but it was Alyssum Yellow, named after a flower. He took a quart home, but I don't think he ever came back."

- LanceFree

Andy Picks

"My mom took a can of Campbell's soups to Home Depot to get a color match for the red part. She then painted the kitchen, which was full of Campbell's soup tchotchkes, Campbell's soup red." -

TGSwithtraceyjordan

"Andy Warhol would be proud."

- vishuskitty

Sexy Colors

babe dancing GIFGiphy

"I used to work at a sex shop. We took a dancer thong into a place to color match the shade of pink for paint for the inside of our store. They ended up naming the color Booty Pants."

- jedgica

If only I wore underwear, I never would've thought to use it though. And my dog and cat are all black, so that would've been simple, had I been painting a cave. But people certainly get creative. I mean, soup for walls? Hungry much?

Clean Mix

Giphy

"Somebody brought in a bar of soap for me to match. I think it was Irish spring."

- OpenlyAMoose

Not Pepsi?

"We did Coca Cola red, color matched a Coca Cola sign. (My husband only likes Coke, not Pepsi.) We didn't paint the walls red (walls are a soft yellow), but we painted the picture frames in the nearby room, and a clock frame, things like that. Stuff we can take off the walls if we decide to go a different route later, haha."

- LadyCiani

Never just one chip...

"Tostitos spinach dip. It was odd enough and with a good reward that I haven't forgotten it. A long time ago I worked for one of Home Depot's competitors and a someone came into ask if I'd be able to match the spinach dip that Tostitos was about to roll out. He wanted undercooked, perfectly cooked, and over cooked matched so that they could paint the inside of jars to show the manufacturing teams what each looked like as it all was made."

"The guy showed me a jar of the dip and we talked about how he'd have to remove all the spinach and red stuff (bell peppers, tomatoes?) chunks and have just the actual dip. He left but came in a few days later with just the dips smeared and dried on some little cards or something, then I spent a couple of hours working with him. To get the colors right. In the end he was happy."

"A day after that he came in just to bring me a couple of bags full of Lays (Tostitos parent company) and Tostitos with multiple jars of dips, including the not yet released spinach dip. He told me to share it all but I was in my mid 20s working full time and trying to finish my second college run at the time, so that free food was a godsend. I put those bags in my car instead of the break room and took it all home."

- GrahamTheCracker404

Dirty Lady

"Older lady comes in with a ziploc bag full of dirt. i figure she wants us to test it's pH or, something. Nope. She has a walkway, and when it rains some of the dirt from her flowerbed runs on to the walkway. she wants to paint the walk way the same color as the dirt so it isn't as noticeable."

"I try to talk her in to using landscape ties or something to prevent the dirt from getting on the the concrete in the first place. Nope, just wants to paint it. Ok. So i asked her if she wanted the paint to match the color of the dirt when it was wet or dry. Blew her mind."

- cptpedantic

Manual Labor

Ned Beatty Art GIFGiphy

"Oh, now that's long ago... I used to be very good at manually matching colors (no machines in those days). There was the standard bits of paper and cloth."

"One day someone walks in covered in dried paint, and asks me to match the color on their arm. Someone has spilled the paint all over him and they needed more, but had lost the color identification code somehow. He stood around patiently for an hour until I sorted out an exact match."

- Saigonauticon

People Share The Scariest Thing They've Ever Experienced While Home Alone | George Takei’s Oh Myyy

Bunnings

"A mum came in with her daughter in a swimming costume and plonked her up on the counter and I colour matched the bum of her swimmers which were a bright blue that were apparently her school colours."

- Chrysuss

Doing the Good Work

"About 10 years ago I was working at Walmart in high school, this lady once came in and said she has a color in mind but can't find anything similar. So she describes it and I guess how to make close to it. It comes out and she wants me to add a little more pink to it so I do it and mix again. This went on for near an hour but then I finally got it right. It was a great shift."

- RealHuman96

Skin Woman

"It's a tie between the large jar of ghee (clarified butter) and someone's skin. I got both of those within a week of each other. The skin thing was because a woman came in looking for a paint color that would match her skin so I thought, "f**k it, let's match her arm and see what happens." She loved it so much she ordered it for her whole house. I named that color "Susan's arm."

"Edit: I forgot a couple of other weird ones. scotch masking tape blue (was really happy with how that one turned out), multiple ottomans, a reading chair, dog fur, an egg, a painter's shirt and a painter's jeans. Whenever people ask me this question i'll respond with "let me tell you about the skin woman" which is probably the worst out-of-context sentence you could hear out of a home depot employee."

The Sign

walmart GIFGiphy

"I worked at Lowes, but someone once wanted the blue color of the sign hanging above the paint area. There was no way I could get the sign down to put it in the scanner. I picked a paint Swatch that I thought came the closest and he agreed to it."

- RedditBrowser90

Glitter Girl

"It wasn't a color match exactly, we just had to mix a very bright pink. It was afterward that the mom of this little girl pulled out a container of glitter and said "will this be able to be mixed in with it too?" So we ended up just kind of saying forget it and mixing a big container of glitter into a gallon of paint. I'm not sure if it ever worked, kind of doubt it did, but the little girl was super excited about her glitter paint."

- Zierdo

Speckle

"Overheard while buying paint for my son's room. Lady in front was complaining bc the green she ended up with didn't have the 'speckle' she whips out a chameleon, photo of I presume the same chameleon, and is trying to tell the young lady that the color they made for her was so flat."

"The young lady was so confused. Lady kept asking why the paint didn't have the speckle like the photo and animal. Stood there patiently and watched the staff try and explain what dimensions are, how you can't match gradient, patterns etc with one shade of paint."

- Metemgee

Get the Tape

"Worked at Walmart about 18 years ago and had to occasionally run the paint area. Wife and husband brought in a 4 foot by 4 foot piece of wall that they painted. They wanted me to match it. The wife then pulls a paint splotch from her purse, and says something like "this is the paint we used from Home Depot!" Some people are just born to entertain."

- BarnacleMcBarndoor

Dear Ben

"Had someone bring a chocolate milkshake into our store wanting paint matched to it. My other favorite story is a couple who bought Ben Hogan's house in Westover Hills in Fort Worth. They brought in a sample of something that was oil based paint and had nicotine stains. We tried to explain to them that it use to be white or off white but the yellowing of the paint and the nicotine had turned it to this snot yellow color. They didn't care, they wanted the color Ben Hogan had been living with - just freshened up."

- C-Rock

For Jesus

jesus wink GIFGiphy

"Not Home Depot, but we had a customer come in with a statue of the baby Jesus from her church's Nativity scene."

"The paint was chipped and she said the price to replace the statue was too high--so she asked us to see if we could match it. The woman working the paint desk with me said she'd give it a try. She succeeded. That's right, she color-matched the baby Jesus."

- retailguy_again

In the Sky

"My wife worked at Lowe's and had a lady come in asking for the color of the sky. My wife told her to look at the samples and pic a color and she'd mix it up. The lady said "No I want the actual color of the sky" like she wanted her wall to look like the inside of a Vegas casino. My wife seeing this lady is going to be a problem, asks her "What time of day do you want? If it's night time I've got black."

"Now the lady is getting upset that she can't just buy one can of paint to make her wall look exactly like the sky. My wife finished the conversation with "bring in a sample and I'll see what I can do." Lady then proceeded to ask for the manager."

- catjam

Look at that some people are nuttier than me. Retail careers are never easy. Whether you're selling food, cars or paint. The customer is always right and always crazy.

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People Describe The Moment They Realized Their 'Friend' Was No Friend At All

Reddit user Aesthetik_1 asked: 'What made you instantly realize This "friend" is not a real friend?'

Two guys hi-fiving each other
Tyler Nix/Unsplash

A good friend is not always the one with whom you share laughs and fun experiences.

The friendships you want to keep include those who won't abandon you in a time of need or someone who supports you in a variety of complicated situations where not even a family member can be relied upon.

Unfortunately, many of us have experienced a time when a person's true colors revealed to us that the so-called "friend" we've always trusted wasn't one at all.

Curious to hear examples of this, Redditor Aesthetik_1 asked:

"What made you instantly realize This 'friend' is not a real friend?"

These Redditors didn't realized at the time that they were being used.

Recurring Favor

"When he only called me when he needed something. It didn't hit me until much later."

– Queasy-Location-9303

"I have one of those 'friends'. She always gushes about how we're friends but she never initiates contact unless she wants me to do something for her."

– StiffAssedBrit

The Errand Girl

"Several years back, I had a friend who introduced me to this new boy she was seeing. Maybe a year later, their relationship blew up in a fury of bs (whole other story), but by the time they split, I was equally friends with both of them. He and I were both photographers at the time, so the friendship was instantaneous."

"One day we started talking about her, neither positively nor in poor taste, just kind of in general."

"He then asked me 'when she texts to hang out, what does she usually want to do?'"

"I paused. I thought. Holy sh*t, she'd either be asking for a favour or for help with some kind of errand. I was her f'king errand girl."

"She texted me a month or two later, just a 'hey'. I never responded. She never texted again."

"I'm still friends with her ex, though. That dude is genuine as heck."

– ChamomileBrownies

Testing The Friendship

"When you decide to let them be the one to reach out. And you never hear from them again."

– plzdontgetmad

"Yup. Made plans with a friend three times, she cancelled each time. I finally told her to let me know when she was free, we haven’t hung out since."

"She was a good friend for the season, but not a lifetime."

– NoMrBond3

People were shocked to discover the moment they realized they didn't really know who their "friend" was anymore.

The Chaperon

"I had been giving rides to a girl I thought was my friend. To and from school in high school. She wasn’t really suppose to ride with other teens but due to her mothers work hours we could easily pull this off. I thought we were close."

"One day while on the way home my brakes went out. We were about 2 blocks from her gated neighborhood. I managed to roll in safely and parked at her house to call a tow truck."

"She flipped. Told me I couldn’t stay. She knew my brakes were not working as she had also been terrified when we couldn’t stop. She said she wanted to go to a movie that weekend with other friends and her mom would ground her if she saw me at the house. I offered to lie and say I only stopped there as my car malfunctioned on my way home. I had to pass her neighborhood on my way home anyways."

"She refused. Started to scream at me. She didn’t care what happened I had to go. Started to call the guard at the front gate to tell them I had broken in and was threatening her."

"I left her and that friendship that moment. I managed to roll my car slowly to a mechanic not too far away but never forgot the shi* feeling of knowing I could have been seriously hurt and she wouldn’t have cared. She wanted to see a movie. She had the nerve to sheepishly call and ask me a couple days later if I could give her a ride to school. Told her I was too busy and no longer had time… after all I wanted to help her obey her mom's rules. She rode the bus til she graduated."

– Duffarum

Unwilling Companion

"I had this friend in school. Each year there was a funfair in our city, all students received vouchers for a drink and something to eat. This friend complained the whole day that she had no one to accompany her to the funfair. So, stupid me offered to go with her."

"Once we arrived we met another friend of hers. And another, and another... until we were a group of 5 or 6 people. I didn't know anyone and was basically just walking behind them. This friend took me aside and said, 'My friends think you are annoying, and we would like you to leave.'"

"It was a pleasure to see that she failed her exams a year later."

– Auldale

There's the spirit of competition, but when it's taken seriously, we're no longer game for these friendships.

I Can Do It Better

"Constantly 'one ups' me. A real friend is happy for you."

– Complex-Half8338

"That one time I got a fake bag but she doesn’t know and then 2 weeks later messaged me that she also bought a luxury bag… Then when I got a bf, she also went to get a bf within 3 months which is TOTALLY fine but she constantly messages me for us to go on a double date. Anyways, sadly they didn’t last long :( I mentioned that I wanted to go to Cuba, she went ahead and bought herself a ticket to Cuba but I didn’t end up going lol"

– Hot-Coffee-8465

Never Steal The Spotlight

"When they loved the idea of me shining, but behind their shadow, I could never do or achieve anything above them, and when I did, they would get jealous."

– Jasssin23

"Yes! I recently ghosted a friend because of this kind of behavior. She was trying to compete about EVERYTHING. Like she bragged about how her mom’s car accident was more traumatic than my elderly MIL’s - which is not even an appropriate thing to compare. She would also try to 'outshine' celebrations of my milestones and was mean to several of my friends for no apparent reason. She was a loose cannon at best."

– thefifthtrilogy

All About Me

"ALL she talks about it herself and her problems. Granted she has a a lot but never asks about me or my life until she realizes she just bypassed my attempt to want to talk about something in my life bothering me and continued to talk about herself."

– PokemomOnTheGo

People can just be so rude.

"When I got really sick. Very few came to help."

– Tofflus1

"Same here. I got cancer and everyone I knew was over the top supportive for the first six months and then all but three of my friends just vanished. I saw one of them at a Halloween party while I was going through chemo and she told me that my bald head made people uncomfortable. I was dressed as Captain Picard, it was awesome and she ruined it."

– CatGoNoTail

Not Missing High School

"At lunch, she was sitting with her boyfriend, I was sitting with our friend circle. She came up to me, guilted me into sitting with her and her boyfriend, and then proceeded to ignore me for the rest of lunch."

"She didn't care about me, she just didn't want me talking to the friend circle that she had abandoned for her boyfriend. When I pointed this out to her, she called me a jealous b*tch."

"Ah, high school. How I don't miss thee."

– Symnestra

These examples actually served as a good reminder for me to take a moment and assess my friendships.

Not so much about how I've been treated but more about checking myself to see if I'm respecting the people I call my friends.

We've all been guilty of casually mentioning future plans to get together. I embarrassingly wait for people to initiate something, which is terrible.

Show up for your friends. Make them feel important like the individuals they are.

There are few moments in life more momentous than buying your first home.

Of course, as is the case with any big decision, after going through with it, your mind begins to spiral down into a series of doubts.

Most of the time, once you've moved in and lived there for a while, all these doubts begin to slowly disappear.

In some cases, though, those doubts quickly turn into regrets.

Particularly when you notice more and more elements of what you thought was your "dream" home that is more reminiscent of a nightmare.

Redditor californiabred was curious to hear the biggest regrets from people who recently purchased a home, leading them to ask:

"Homeowners who bought recently, what’s your biggest regret?"

Not The What, But The When

"Not buying 4 years ago."- 3rdPartyArbitor

Location, Location, Location!

"The situation when you bought a house where it was possible and a month later they sell a house in the area where you wanted"- BenefitOk3952

"Not knowing enough about the area/town."

"I hate where we live."

"Hoping we can move by the time my oldest starts kindergarten."- MP1087

jason patric fox GIF by Wayward PinesGiphy

Upon Closer Inspection...

"The inspector told us the main drain in the basement was clogged."

"We thought it was clogged with something normal."

"It was, in fact, 'clogged' with cement from when our basement floor was redone."

"So now our basement regularly gets standing water on one side."- doctorpotterhead

"Hiring the wrong home inspector they missed so much, I really have to wonder if all those reviews were bought and paid for."- CaptainQuoth

Landscaping Decisions

"Not planting the fruit trees sooner."

"It’s a long wait."- SageLeaf1

Plant Hope GIF by The Seed of Life FoundationGiphy

How Long Have You Got...

"Be shameless enough to perform your own base level of inspection of a house so you don’t have to rely on what an inspector finds or get in a situation where you have to make an offer regardless of what the inspection finds."

"Turn all the faucets on and run the dishwasher."

"Start the washer machine for a second."

"Figure out if there is any water pressure issue."

"Bring a multi line laser and a tape measure."

"Check for any significant changes in slope on the foundation for some settling issues."

"Pay attention to the downspouts."

"Do they terminate right at the house or do they have longer pipes that lead the water away?"

"Pay attention to the flooring and create a rough estimate of what it will cost to immediately replace the flooring."

"Way easier to do when you don’t have a house full of furniture and can do it right before you move in."

"On the financial side you need to talk with multiple lenders at all times and make sure they continue to give you the most up to date closing costs."

"There were a lot of sneaky numbers that made there way in that I was unaware of as a first time home buyer."

"Until that mortgage lender gives you the locked in rate don’t trust them as to what number they are currently telling you."

"Discover your maximum mortgage rate + escrow and work backwards as to the maximum house you can afford."

"Don’t buy based on the pipe dream of refinancing."- from_the_Luft

GIF by BlindspotGiphy

Procrastination...

"Not recent, but I still regret not refinishing the floors before I moved in."

"I'll never do it now."- WinterFilmAwards

"I regret not having the inside painted and the carpet replaced before we moved in."

"Been here two years and it never felt like 'my home' until I got rid of the stains of those who came before."- DaisyRage7

Consider A Test Drive...

"Not particularly recent, but we did not pull out cars in the driveway or attempt to park them."

"So we didn't realize that my car could only enter the driveway from one direction, so I had to turn around half a block up every time I needed to park."

"And we just BARELY got two cars in the driveway."

"So my regret is that I took for granted that the driveway met our needs."- gtizzz

homer simpson episode 24 GIFGiphy

Always Read The Fine Print

"I bought a few years ago."

"So many things have gone sideways."

"One thing I regret is not being educated about permits."

"Contractors/handymen/ anyone who works on your house really, never mentions a permit may be needed."

"Learned that it’s up to me and me alone to do the research and phone calls."

"Currently have a job on hold because they needed a permit."

"The company blamed me and now I’m not sure they’re even going to do the work."

"Watch the movie 'The Money Pit'."

"It’s not that far off."

"Some days I wish I’d just be a renter."- MissPeppingtosh

Simply Not Worth The Effort

"Don't bother childproofing your home."

"They still get in."- Blueblackzinc

season 9 friends GIFGiphy

It's easy to question whether or not buying a home was the right decision.

But rather than live a life full of regret, why not make the most out of what you have, and turn your not-quite-dream home into a temporary dream home?

Who knows, it might even increase the resale value.


A dilapidated shack is ablaze at night
Photo by Stephen Radford

In an instant, anything can change in life.

Deciding to turn left instead of right at a traffic light can save your life -- and you may never know it.

That's why the movie "Sliding Doors" is so great.

Small choices and seemingly minor chances can shift things massively.

Redditor Lexie_Mark wanted to hear about how life can change drastically by the smallest influences, so they asked:

"What's a seemingly minor decision you made that ended up having a massive impact on your life?"

I had dinner with a guy once.

I told him a joke and let him read 5 pages of my writing.

Now I write for this website. BOOM!

Right Turn

Never Mind Baby GIFGiphy

"Turned up to a military recruiting day on the wrong weekend as a youngster. Walked into a BBQ for traumatized veterans accidentally. That changed my mind."

flecknoe

Moving on...

"I had moved countries and decided to go back home after initial plans didn't work out. Had a ticket booked, was in a hotel near the airport, and got an invite to stay with online friends for a week or so before going back. Deferred my ticket, took them up on the offer."

"Met the love of my life there- moved to his city, have a new job, new friends, new life completely."

Severn6

Hey Teach

"While I was experiencing a period of career ennui, I treated myself to taking some college classes in biology, which I had always been interested in."

"While walking in the neighborhood close to the university one day, I saw one of the professors walking down the street, contentedly eating some ice cream. I don't know what possessed me, but I actually stopped him, said hello, that I was in one of his classes, and how much I liked the course."

"I have come across many professors in such casual circumstances before and since and never had the inclination or the guts to talk to them, particularly when they are clearly just having an enjoyable moment and likely don't want to be annoyed by a random student they don't even know."

"But I talked to him, and we had such a nice chat that he invited me to come to his lab and potentially do some work there. I came by a few days later, and he asked me a few questions and then asked one of his postdocs if he'd like to have me give him some help on a project. The postdoc said yes, and within 2.5 years I had my MS in biology (advised by Dr. Professor and helped greatly by that postdoc), and I was on my way to getting my PhD.

"Now I'm the prof."

zazzlekdazzle

On the Vespa

"4 months ago I was riding my Vespa to the gym on a Saturday morning, and I was T-boned by a car pulling out of a side street. She was looking the other way to make sure the traffic was clear and didn’t see me."

"I was coming from her right (in Australia, left-hand drive) and the front left of her car hit the back of my Vespa. If I had been half a second faster, I wouldn’t have been hit."

"I ended up with a crushed lower left leg and foot, permanent nerve damage, and 2 weeks in hospital. Fast forward to now, and I still can’t walk or move my leg and foot, I’m in unimaginable pain, and I (just today) lost my job."

"The recovery timeline is looking like 18-24 months and there’s no guarantee I’ll walk again."

"I was just trying to be healthy and go to the gym on a Saturday, and now my life has totally turned upside down. lol. Sigh."

ShoeAccomplished119

Swipe Right

tinder GIFGiphy

"Matched with a guy on Tinder and complained about my current job. Encouraged (and walked me through) the recruitment process for a government job and 5 years later I’ve had 4 promotions, earned almost twice my old salary, and have much higher job satisfaction."

​misssofifi

Maybe Tinder isn't so bad after all.

Key Strokes

Jim Carrey Reaction GIFGiphy

"Taking a typing class in 1974. Almost no guys took typing at my school. Made life with computers a lot easier."

A20Havoc

"Same here, it was the main reason I got a job in IT, I was able to have a lifelong career."

MyIpodStillWorks

Run

"Started running because I heard it helps with chronic tinnitus, now run 5 days a week, lost 20 kg, stopped drinking, and can sleep. It doesn't cure the tinnitus, there is no cure and probably never will be, but it made it more manageable, lowered the volume in my head, and let me sleep easier. I still have it and struggle with it sometimes, but running/exercise for me is the best way to mitigate the stress chronic tinnitus causes."

rickdangerous85

Brisbane

"Buying tickets to Guns 'N Roses. I'm from Northern Australia and went to the Brisbane show. Ended up going with an old friend who was looking for an extra roommate, moved to Brisbane, did an audio course cause I needed something to do, and ended up working in the music industry full-time. Just got off tour with Suicidal Tendencies as their backline tech and have had an incredible career so far."

Acquiesce95

No Regrets

"My current job was a throwaway application I submitted purely for interview practice. It was one of two listings I saw at once, one was quite detailed and looked really good, and the other one was a handful of vague bullet points that seemed interesting enough. The one I was hoping for never replied, the other one offered me more than the maximum salary on the ad. No regrets."

PM_me_ur_navel_girl

Forever

Smooch Love GIF by molehillGiphy

"I decided to have my first ever one-night stand."

"We've been together for 12 years!"

CrabbiestAsp

"So you still haven't had a one-night stand!"

NickyDeeM

Ah, the curse of the one-night stand gone wrong.

Love is all around.

lab test with pipette and test tubes
Louis Reed on Unsplash

At the end of the last century DNA laboratory companies began to offer direct-to-consumer home DNA test kits.

According to The Center for Genetics and Society, as of November 2023 more than 26 million people have taken an at-home ancestry DNA test.

These tests have helped people find and reunite with long lost family members. However not all revelations were well met.

Unknown ancestry was discovered.

Infidelity and secrets and lies were also exposed by these tests which led to strife in some families.

Keep reading...Show less