You never forget your first, even if sometimes you maybe wish you had. For good or for bad, getting your heart broken for the first time is almost as important as falling in love for the first time.
Here, brokenhearted people share how they got over their first love. Enjoy! And check out the sources for even more chicken soup for the lovelorn soul.
I'm old (50). My first love was 30 years ago. That's a long time.
In short, yes: I got over her. I moved out west, fell in love with other women, lived with a few, played the field. She stayed in my mind for quite a few years, but as we both got on in life, she faded.
But I do remember one day, about 10 years ago, shopping at the mall. I walked past the fragrance section and BAM. It was HER scent. All these memories flooded back into my head. Laying beside her on a winter's night. Watching hockey with her wacky mom. Laughing when her closet bar broke - again. Spending the weekend in the Poconos in the rain. It was a blast of fond nostalgia and I nearly stumbled from its impact.
We're not in contact so that's the last "contact" I had with her.
I can say this to young people: the broken heart hurts but the hurt does not last. You will be amazed at how broadly your life and your loves will replace that hurt. It's like a pitcher of water into a small paper cup. Yet there will always be this standard of affection that was set by that first love. It can't be replaced. Don't forget it, but use it as a standard, a starting place. You will build on it. And what you build won't seem as "pure" or "perfect" as that first one, but it will be stronger, more adaptable, and more satisfying.
I think about her some times but I also remember a quote from Alexander Graham Bell:
"When one door closes, another door opens; but we so often look so long and regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us."
Remember your past, learn from the experience, and follow the opening doors.
Two and a half weeks ago, she told me she cheated on me. During our (5 year) relationship, we were always very clear about this scenario: Cheating ends it all. However, once it had happened, I needed time to think. I realized fully that she was my first real love. I'm 23 and never felt anything like what I felt/feel for her.
However, this made me angrier when thinking what she had done. I felt like she ripped my heart out and stepped on it. I went to confront the guy, but he was a real piece of work. Yes, I wanted to bash his face in, but he was not worth it. I still do not understand why she chose him, it just didn't seem right. Could have been that he was (at least to her) a very nice person, but at the moment I confronted him he just behaved like a jerk.
After one week I saw her again and told her it was over. I told her I do still love her, and am still in love with her today, even when I am typing this, I feel the butterflies. Followed by an intense attack of hate for what she has done. Anyway, a relationship with her is not an option anymore; I have to remove her from my life. It is still hard and I think every second of her, of us, of what could have been. But it is time to let go. Who knows, if we were indeed meant to be, our paths will reunite someday. Though at this point I believe that this is something I keep telling myself to make it easier to let go now.
The easy road I could have taken was to forgive her. Of course I wouldnt really be able to forgive her, but I would try convincing myself that I could. I would not trust her anymore, but convince myself I would, too. Easiest would have been to keep it to ourselves and try making it work again. This would have been like driving a car with a punctured tire; you try to convince yourself all is fine, but you know well enough that soon it will come to a standstill and youll need to throw that tire away. I took the hard road, I told her to move out.
To answer your question: no, she is not married. It does hurt me to think she is still working with that guy, and it hurts to think about her with someone else. But I'm still glad we met. We had 5 beautiful years for which I am greatly thankful.
He slept with another girl while I was on vacation, I found out about it, the girl harassed me for 6 months. They're still together and work at a fast food place.
I found out where she lived...I egged her house.
It took me getting married to the woman I actually love to get over what I thought was my first "love".
My first love was my best friend's girlfriend. They were terrible together and when me and her hung out it was great. We had so much fun together and hardly ever argued, basically everything him and her weren't.
I knew she was going to leave him about 3 months before he knew. She wanted to go back to where she moved from and do her own thing. She begged me to come along and I seriously considered it, but in the end I started thinking it was less about her wanting to be with me and more about her wanting to hurt him as much as possible. She left him one day while I was at the coast, about 5 hours away from home. She knew I was coming home within a few days and didn't wait for me. It really hurt me for a long time, more so than I think it hurt him.
A year of serious depression followed all that. I left the house for groceries and work. One morning I woke up and realized that even if I was wrong about her wanting to hurt him and not be with me, it didn't matter. It was pathetic and wrong of me to even entertain the notion of thinking she would leave my best friend for me.
About 5 years later I met a woman who would become my wife. I don't know how to put it, but I knew from the first date. Even in all the time I spent with my best friend's girl, I never felt as comfortable and happy as I have in every moment I spend with my wife.
It was winter time during my 8th grade. Few girls decided they wanted to make this Christmas special rather than usual celebrations we had in school. They wanted everyone to put their names on a bit of paper, Fill a basket with those scribbled names. We had to randomly pick a name, whom we have to anonymously give a gift. I really hoped I wouldn't get a girl. I being a shy early-teenager was really nervous to buy a gift for a girl. Unfortunately, it was a girl. Not only that, but this was a popular girl. As always I tried to avoid that and find a way out of playing Secret Santa . Sadly again teacher made it compulsory for everyone to participate.
I figured out I wasn't the only one under this dilemma. There were some guys like me. Gladly some wanted to be Santa to their crush. Well I helped those desperate lovers. I was kid who used to do lot of favours. People had a problem? I would sort them out. Want your crush's number? I got your back. I knew how strange everybody was, especially me. I exchanged my girl with theirs, not the girls of course just their names. I sorted out everything and finally got some guy's name. Now I wont have to tell anyone at home that I have to buy a present for a girl.
It was around Christmas. Vacations were about to start. I kept the gift safely in the guys bag. I already got my gift few days back. I don't even remember what the gift was. I just remember walking down the corridor and entering the classroom and being welcomed by warm smile. That was beautiful. Some guy brought a really nice present for the girl I was originally Santa to. Most of the girls were surrounding her while she was hugging her gift that she just unwrapped. Everybody assumed I gifted her that wonderful thing she could not get away from. Maybe everyone thought I was that mysterious Santa because I had asked lot of kids to exchange names with. But I knew I wasn't the one who gifted her. Things went on, she kept staring at me, smiling. I think her smile did it.
Everything around me felt good. I started loving everything. It was the first time I felt I looked good. You know when you look in the mirror, you don't see a sob story anymore. Every day was good hair day. I started participating in life, and stopped filling my mind with useless thoughts. Sometimes people use thought to not participate in life. And now I know how dumb and stupid I was. That was the first time I felt how being obsessed for something felt. It wasn't head over heels thing. It wasn't like in movies, you felt dying for someone is a great idea. It was plain and beautiful feeling toward her. She found many different ways to spend more time with me. I just wanted to talk to her, and feel someone was listening to me. I never thought of doing those cheesy things young kids do, holding hands, engraving their initials with a heart on desks. This reminds me of something, how someone can engrave their names on trees and wall, unless they came on date with a knife or something sharp. Its weird.
But sadly all those things started dying slowly. We passed our 8th and went onto next class. All the students were shuffled. She went to different section than mine. And that was the end of my puppy-love. And things were back to normal except I learned so many things. That was the first time I got in touch with music, it was not because of her though. That experience just made me try new things. Songs never stuck a chord inside me like they were supposed to before that. I started with listening to Linkin Park and Rage against the Machine. I could connect to those lyrics and those weren't even love songs. I felt what the artist wants to share. What all those songs meant. And I thought how many people have loved those songs. And how many had great time listening to those songs. I wish I would write a song like that someday just to know how it feels to make so many people happy.
That was the first experience of liking a girl. Though I don't even remember how she looked or where is she is now. Now I remember I didn't even love her like young-me used to think. I just loved feeling for the first time that I belonged somewhere. It was just experiencing something for the very first time. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon. Thats why I love first times. I want my whole life to be composed of them. Though I didn't learn most of these things because of that experience in my early-teen years. But because of all those experiences that happened last summer. Due to which I was able recall all that account of Secret Santa. Because of which I was able to write these things down, and think clearly.
I read somewhere how important it is in life not necessarily to be loved... but to feel loved and I love yourself. After previous summer I found a new self-inside me that I don't hate. I think maybe part of what got me into trouble was that I did too much thinking. Sometimes I tried too hard to make sense of the world, to figure out why people were bad to each other so often. I made a radical change in my lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which I may previously never have thought of doing. People who try to control situations all the time are afraid that if they don't, nothing will work out the way they want. Living in present and doing my best. I stopped being concise about my life and started drifting away like a feather to wherever the wind may take me.
Dated a girl for 7 years, thought she was it, then we broke up. I've since started a new relationship that's been going on for almost 3 years now. It's a much healthier relationship and things are just all around better.
Buuuuuut, it somehow doesn't feel the same. It's not that I love her any less, just that I suppose I'm more realistic about what love is.
Love back then seemed like this special thing that selected you and you were just there for it and it was like all the movies and it was wonderful and great and the sun was always warm. Now, I realize love doesn't choose me, I choose love. I choose to love this person and to make it work no matter what, etc.
It's kind of a lot nicer because I know it's my decision that I want to be with this person and I can decide what kind of loving relationship I want to have with her. But it's also kind of like your first Christmas after learning Santa isn't real. There's just something not quite as magical about it in a sad, growing-up kind of way.
Sadly, I suspect I will never get over her completely. I had never loved anyone that much before. I really gave her everything I had, but in the end it wasn't enough for her.
To be fair, I should have known. Though in a way, I suppose I did know. We were only kids. I was 18, she was 16. I told myself it wouldn't work for four months while rejecting her advances. She was too young, too nave, and besides, how could she love me? I quickly fell victim to her charm and gave in. From that moment, I was hooked.
I truly loved her. You could say I was obsessed and I wouldn't fault you for it. In retrospect, I kind of was. Which made it that much harder when we split. To make matters worse, everything that I had told myself before we got together was continuously being confirmed and I pretended not to notice to avoid facing the reality of our inevitable break up.
Fast forward to now and it's been six years. I'm still a bit jaded. I'm practically married, I have two children that I adore, yet I still think about her. I still miss her. I still love her. Despite knowing it would have never worked, and despite it feeling completely irrational, I still love her.
Part of me hopes it will just go away at some point, but I don't think it will. And part of me is happy about that.
We met on the school bus, I was 14 & he was 15. He was the cutest guy I'd ever seen- shaggy brown hair, flannel shirt & hole jeans, big ice-blue puppy dog eyes, and a goofy lopsided smile that just melted my heart. It was love at first sight- the first time I laid eyes on him all the breath left my body & my stomach fell out of my butt.
I fell madly in love with him & looked forward to the bus ride home every day just so I could ogle him. I began to suspect that he liked me too when he started sitting closer to me every day, and the clincher came one day when I had a bad day & boarded the bus scowling, and out of nowhere he whipped out a marker, drew a line down his face, and said to me, "Hey look, I'm a butt!". It sounds silly, but that's how I new he liked me. Long story short, we dated for 5 months. He was my first boyfriend, my first kiss, and my first love. It ended with me not being ready to lose my virginity & him being a sweet but typical 15 year old boy, if you get my drift. He cheated on me constantly but did a very good job of keeping it hidden & keeping the relationship going. I only found out when I called his house one day & some girl answered the phone. He admitted everything that day & clearly felt horrible, saying that he really did love me but he blamed it on his hormones. I of course was heartbroken & we split up.
That was all back in 1995 (I'm old, heh). In late 2002 we reconnected through a mutual friend (my best friend at the time) & the first thing he did was sit me down & sincerely apologize for all the grief he put me through when we were together. I had forgiven him for all that long ago of course, but all the love I had for him was rekindled by the fact that he actually still cared enough to apologize after all that time. He was such a kind, loving person. Unfortunately though, he was unstable & had a lot of issues with drugs as well so I hesitated to let myself get too close to him again. But even so, we started hanging out a lot & I grew to really look forward to our time together. Despite all his problems, when I looked in his eyes he was still the same sweet, silly boy I fell for as a girl. Soon I began to consider a relationship with him again & it looked like he was leaning the same way as well.
In early May of 2003, I got a hysterical phone call from my best friend. She kept screaming "Chris is dead! Oh my god he's dead!" into the phone & at first, I thought she was playing some kind of sick prank on me. But sure enough, he had been found dead in his bed that morning. He was only 23.
It was horrifying enough that he was dead, but I felt partially responsible due to the fact that I had been planning to call him on the day that it happened but ended up doing something else instead. The combination of drugs and medication he'd taken stopped his breathing. I can't help but think that if I HAD just called him & invited him to go do something, he'd still be alive today. I made sure he knew he was forgiven after he apologized for all the cheating, but I never got to tell him how much I still loved him. I will be haunted by this for the rest of my life.
A part of my heart died that day & I miss him so, so much still. It's been 10 years since his death, but I'm nowhere near over it. I'm tearing up as I write this, in fact. I still have dreams about him and I always wake up crying. Every time I hear someone say that young teenagers don't know what love is, I wanna throat-punch them. What I felt for Chris was & is the purest, strongest love I've ever felt for anyone in my entire life.
I still love her and I think about her every day but it's different now. Her and I are very similar. Extremely low self esteem, abandonment issues, unknowing co-dependence. But the way we handle them are different and resulted in a lot of fighting. Our relationship was awful. First we fought. Then the fighting escalated. We never got physical (she pushed me a couple times, claiming that I was intimidating her), we yelled at each other a lot, she spit on me. It was all around a terrible year and a half but not because I didn't love her but because looking back our problems only exacerbated each other's problems. We knew this would happen, it's why we called it quits the first time we dated but we quickly realized we were in love and ended up back together. I miss her every day but I know we can't be together. We messed each other up pretty bad.
I know she's still single but it's by choice. She's a smart driven women who is already a leader in her field and is only bound for greatness. I hope whomever does come a long doesn't break her heart like I did.
We met in college in Ohio while we were dating other people - mine was long distance. I was playing the Pogues in my dorm room, and she popped her head in to say she liked it. Her boyfriend was a bit of a meat-head, and whenever he dropped the ball, I picked it up.
He didn't want to go to the Ani Difranco concert with her, so she went with me. He didn't sign up for ballroom dancing, but I did (before I knew she'd be there) and we were dance partners. He wouldn't watch Wim Wenders movies, so she watched it with me and my friends. She got sick, he went out to party, and I was on night-guard duty with some Mrs. Grass soup.
By the time I broke up with my girlfriend, She left Ohio to go to New York, so I never got to ask her out. My heart broke for the first time. A few months later, a visiting friend from Scotland needed a ride to NYC. I drove him there with a stop off to see Her in Rochester, NY. We all hung out for two days, and as we left to complete our trip to NYC for my friend's flight, it dawned on me that I may never see her again. It would add 5 hours to my return trip to Ohio if I stopped by to see her. We hugged goodbye, and I looked her in the eyes and said, "I love you." I felt like it was still goodbye, and I wasn't trying to accomplish anything by it. I just wanted her to know. I turned and drove away.
We drove through the night, and at 2 AM, we arrived in NYC at JFK airport. My friend, David, said, "If you don't go back and see Her, you're useless." We said goodbye, and I hopped back in the car to drive back to her house right then.
5 hours later, I pulled up to her house, ready to boldly ask Her out. I could see her through the screen door wrapped in a blanket on the couch, so I opened it and walked over to her, thinking I had a lot of explaining to do for why I was driving 5 hours out of my way to see her again. I didn't have to say a thing as she just jumped up to give me a hug. Then we kissed.
After that, it was about 6 months of wonderful before we hit some reality. It was just hard to manage the distance, and I was losing my confidence. I was financially strapped, and I was exhausted from working, studying, and traveling. I didn't see a way ahead for us, so I started to let it go.
I spiraled down into depression, thinking that I didn't deserve the girl I loved because I couldn't make it work financially with her. I didn't return her calls. I didn't answer the phone. I became something of a jerk.
I also became a teacher, and I worked in some awful (but great) schools to help pay for grad school. I dated other people, and I heard from friends that She was dating too. My depression got worse until I hit rock bottom. I made a choice about living or dying, and I decided that I would live, and make it my goal to be the person who wouldn't have let her go the way I did. Not to get her back, but just to not screw it up if it happened again.
When I reached a place where I could honestly say I wasn't depressed, I wrote to her. I apologized, and said I was prepared to give her anything she needed in order to get closure. No response.
She called me up months later. I heard her voice say my name, and my heart raced. We talked for a while about everything. She told me about the guy she was dating. (He was from Sudan one of the Lost Boys.) We said goodbye, and my heart broke again. It felt like an actual goodbye. I looked up her boyfriend and he was in the news as a genuine hero. It was finished. But I was happy for her.
A few months later, I went on a cross-country trip to make amends with other friends whose bridges I burned. I drove alone from Chicago to Denver to Vancouver to L.A. to St. Louis, making amends with my friends, and stopping at every National Park that I could. In the words of Tom Waits, I was never more alive, or alone. It felt wonderful.
Out of nowhere, on this trip, my uncle in Lake Placid contacted me to invite me for a visit. That trip would take me right through Rochester, NY. I called her up to ask if I could stop by for a visit. I didn't know it, but she had just broken up with her boyfriend the day before. She invited me over, and I drove there within a day. My heart melted when she greeted me with the biggest smile. We talked for hours upon hours. As I drove off to Lake Placid, she told me to stop by on the way back.
One month later, we had our second "first kiss". We've been married for 9 years this Christmas.
Insults come in many forms, most of them involving swear words or similar affronts. However, there is something to be said for a truly cutting remark made without the use of such language.
Some favorites are always old Victorian slang and insults. They just hit different. Something about telling an a-hole “you sir are an unlicked cub and your wife a sausage wallet" is just more satisfying. Although we do not recommend going around insulting people, the list of swear-free insults below will certainly get a chuckle.
Redditor Beadiest_Cape wanted to hear the best cuss free insults out there and asked:
“What's the best insult you've heard without swearing?"
“After getting a compliment on his assignment, A buddy of mine leaned back in his chair and told our college professor, ‘I'm not as dumb as I look.’ To which he leaned forward on his podium and said, ‘You couldnt be.’” dusty_boots
“…and may God have mercy on your soul.”
“One of the best is from Billy Madison, ‘What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.’” maswriter
You should apologize…
“You’re not the dumbest person in the world, but you'd better hope they don’t die.” WhatThatBoiDoin
“Whenever this question is posted, my favorite is usually along the lines of: ‘There's a tree somewhere in the Amazon jungle with sole purpose of producing oxygen you breathe. You should go find that tree and apologize." all_worth
How low can they go?
“The bar was on the ground and you grabbed a shovel” BlckAlchmst
“That reminds me of one comment i read saying: ‘the bar was so low it was practically a tripping hazard in hell, yet here you are dancing limbo with the devil’.” give_it_a_vodkashotSeries 2 Limbo GIF by BBC ThreeGiphy
"Having been born an infant, and realizing he quite liked it, he decided to stay one forever." overt-wan-kenobert
“From Casablanca: ‘You probably think pretty poorly of me don't you?’”
"’I would if I gave you any thought’" koiven
These teachers got clap backs for days…
“I had a teacher tell some kid ‘Nothing you have to say is of any consequence...to anyone.’ He was an odd teacher who kinda talked like that, but it was his version of savage. The room lost its sh*t in unison.” glib_battling
“I had a guy sit behind me in English class let out of fart that reverberated off the wooden seat. The whole class heard it. The teacher said ‘that's the most intelligent thing you've said all year’. Priceless” melbers22
“I was at a karaoke 50th the other night and this one caught my eye. Thankfully I wasn't drunk enough to sing it. But I love this song for its sick burn. Poor old Edie. Bob really gave it to her that time.” crankenfranken
Down the Monty Python rabbit hole…
“Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt... of elderberries!” UpTwoDownOne
“Elderberries were the cheap replacement for grapes in making wine. That is basically ‘your father is a drunk and can't afford the good stuff’.” ukezi
“And hamsters have sex all the time with no regard for monogamy.” draconum_ggg
“So, ‘Your mother is being cheated on but is also a w*ore and you father is a drunk who is also broke’.” EmpanadaDeMayonesa2
“‘My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a...middle.’ --Mal Reynolds”
"’It's not that I hate you, exactly; it's just that any admiration I have for you is well under control.’” FlourChild1026
Shakespeare master of insults…
“Straight from Shakespeare ‘I wish we could become better strangers’.” Dundeklil
“Also from Shakespeare: (Fallstaff, after Bardolf calls him fat) ‘Do thou amend thy face, and I'll amend my life.’” driving_andflying
Excuse us while we go grab the burn cream.
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Aging is a sneaky process. Most of us don't realize how old we've gotten until we find we are no longer able to do things the way we used to with ease when we were younger.
Sure, it's depressing, but you know what? Aging happens to all of us, and no one is getting out of here alive.
"What gets worse with age?"
Physical consequences of aging is one of the cruelest things in life.
Watch Your Hyde
"Your skin. Take care of it. Skin cancer sucks."
What The Body Does With Food
"Every meal is followed by a poop."
"Bending over to pick a quarter off the ground. Hurts your back, gut and your fingers don't work. That's why there is change all over my floor. ;)"
After A Wild Night
"Hangovers for sure."
"At 18 I could go heavily drink and feel damn near 100% the next day. Now I get horrid mental and physical effects. Probably should quit drinking all together."
When our senses gradually start to fail us, it's yet another reminder of our brief mortality.
"Make sure you get your eye dilated every year and check for cataracts."
"My hearing is on the decline. I don't think it'll go completely, but I did get hearing aids last year."
The degeneration of certain abilities as we get older is too much to bear.
Staying Above Water
"My ability to cope. I'm just burnt out all the time."
"I feel the same. Aside from my family and friends, I have no care for anyone or anything anymore. Nothing phases me but that's not a good thing IMO. I feel very apathetic towards everything, I'm tired all the time and just want to lay down."
"The ability to sleep through the night."
"Used to be a world champion sleeper and now 5-6 straight hours is huge. Pretty much wide awake every night at 3am."
Putting Up With People
"Humanity.... The older I get the less I want to deal with people."
"Friendship - making new friends after your 20s becomes a big struggle, and the newer friendships just aren't the same. You can literally run out of 'lifelong friends' due to death, disease, people growing apart, etc."
I found as I'm getting older my patience and tolerance for certain things have gotten worse.
Waiting in line at the grocery store while someone fumbles with their payment option, or getting antsy when the food I ordered at the restaurant is taking way too long are things that never bothered me ten years ago.
I"m not curmudgeonly by any means, at least not yet. Besides, I'm not that old.
But to all the cranky elders I grew up with who complained about poor service or lack of efficiency, I get it now, and I hear you.
It's never easy to leave home.
Redditors that were kicked out before or at 18, what happened to your relationship with your parents afterwards?
Things outside your control, like divorce, shouldn't be the child's concern. If the parents don't handle things properly then unfortunately it ends up falling on the kid, forcing them to make the tough choice.
Putting Your Problems On Others
"Parents kicked me out when they got divorced and "couldn't afford to take care of me anymore."
"Struggled for a while but doing ok now. Don't talk to either of my parents and that seems to have improved my life quite a bit."
Suffering The Consequences
"My parents divorced when I was 12, dad had primary custody. He got a new girlfriend who hated me and my brother when I was about 16. My only request was they wait til I left for college to get married. He dumped me and everything that was mine in his house on my estranged mother's front lawn, jumped back in the car, and drove off a full two months before school started. They were married by August (on my mother's birthday)."
"I moved out of my mom's place as soon as I made a friend in the new city 500 miles from where I grew up using $400 a month he gave me for expenses to keep him from feeling too guilty about it (my mom's alimony payments expired right around the same time I left, so he just gave it to me instead of her, he did the same thing when he forced my brother out after I graduated. I joke when he's old I'll find him a nursing home that costs $400 a month so see can see what that buys you.)"
"I begged to be allowed to come back for holidays every year for a decade. I had to listen to my dad call me every holiday with his new wife's kids clearly there in the background and when I asked about it he would just sigh. One time he had me call his wife to ask her and she just spent 5 minutes cursing at me and telling me I was awful. I was maybe 19 and had never had any real trouble, legally, academically, or socially. I spent summers on my friends couches so I could go back to see them at least. He would try to meet up with me, but I was just so angry and hurt I usually didn't tell him I was in town."
"He is still shocked I don't want anything to do with him now that I'm older. He still thinks I deserve everything I got, which I know because it was the last thing I ever let him say to me before calling it officially done. He won't be at my wedding. He won't ever know my husband or my family. I'm done."
"Did fix my relationship with my mom eventually though. She was actually sorry for the time we missed and glad to have me back in her life. I'm also still tight with my brother."
Growing To Understand The Decision
"I was kind of a b-tch as a teenager, moved out at 17 after she gave me an ultimatum, didn't talk to my mom for three-ish years, then only on holidays. Then I moved back in with her for 6 months, which was not fun as someone 21 years old who had been on their own for 5 years prior."
"I did a lot of work in therapy and we repaired our relationship. She's now one of my best friends, we live about ten minutes apart, and I go over just to chat a few times a week."
"I hated her at the time, but I have grown to understand that she was trying to do the best with what she had. Also, I was a very difficult child."
You know what's a perfectly reasonable solution to not having a home to live in?The military, apparently.
(Only join if you feel that it's right for you. Don't let anyone make you join.)
Military Or Bust
"Six months before I was 18 my grandmother was adamant that she was going to take me to enlist in the military and I said no, so she wanted me out at 18. I arranged to move in with my gf."
"By the time of moving day, my grandmother was acting like our spat never happened- "keep in touch" "don't be a stranger" "dont burn any bridges". I only really interacted with her at family gatherings after that, and I have her on Facebook so she can keep up-to-date without me actively taking to her."
No, Really. Military Or Bust.
"My mom always said that "had to be out" at 18 once I graduated. I honestly took this to heart. I didn't have a bad relationship with my parents, but I was also left to raise myself most of the time."
"I graduated at the beginning of my senior year, was 18, and moved the f-ck right out, joined the military shortly thereafter. My mom had a fit. I thought this was what she wanted."
"I'm "OK" with my folks, but I basically left for 5 years and stopped calling. Still very much independent, very successful, and have very little of what is a relationship with them. I didn't have role models or people to guide me. I'm a parent in my 30s and I'm trying to unf-ck everything and treat my child like she should be treated, lots of attention and love. I'm salty about the way I was raised; I often upset at them. The more I grow, the more distance I out between myself and my parents."
"I'll be sure go guide my kid and not make her leave home asap."
A Fizzled Relationship
"I was 17 when my mom and I had a huge fight. She said, "If you walk out the door, don't bother coming back" - one of those empty threats. Of course she was surprised when I packed some bags and took off. I stayed with a guy that I had been seeing for a couple of months."
"That relationship fizzled out fast and I wound up coming back home. Learned fast that he was a drug user. He was also staying at his brother's house and said it was cool that I was there. But then the brother announced he was coming home - and that was it for me."
"Took a long time to patch things up with my mom. We started getting along better later in my life. It took a long time to get there though. My dad and I always got along well."
Then there's these situations, far outside the reasonable control of any child. Abuse and divorce are situations which shouldn't be placed at the feet of someone under 18, but this is how it goes sometimes.
Burning That Trust
"It's a long, ugly story. But yes, it did change everything. I still harbor resentment toward my mom for caring more about getting my stepdad out of jail than making sure I was OK or taking me to the hospital. I'll never stop loving my mom and I know she loved me back, but it was clear that her men sat higher on her priority list than I did. I was 16, he didn't even have a legal right to kick me out in the first place."
"And I obviously never trusted my stepdad again. I haven't talked to him since my mom died in 2010 and I hope I never see him again. I couldn't care less about how his life is going, I have more important things to focus on."
Lose A Key? Get Out.
"When I was 16 my mom invited her alcoholic boyfriend to move in with us. He hid his drinking quite well, and he hid the violent outbursts he had towards me even better. I tried talking to my mother and grandmother about it and they accused me of lying because I "just didn't like him". The whole thing snowballed and, because my dad wasn't talking to me or my sibling at the time (a key fell out of my pocket before I left for school, got locked out of the house for a couple hours. Apparently that was the worst thing ever and justified a massive argument and falling out), I ended up on a bus to a different city at 2am to live with a friend whose dad owned a roofing business.
Spent a few months hating every second of it and trying to make it on my own. Eventually, my mom's boyfriend started to go after my sibling, and it all ended when he threw a glass of water at them (glass included) in front of my mom. I was able to go back home, but things were never the same and I fell into a deep depression and it left me with some trust issues, especially with people around the age I am now. It also left me with an odd aversion to physical labour"
"A lot more has happened since then, despite repeated attempts to reconcile our relationships. I ultimately decided that I can't be around them, and that it's best to keep my distance from family. I talk to my parents once a year, on Boxing Day, and that's all the time and attention I'm willing to give to them"
Getting Out Of The House No Matter What
"I grew up in an extremely abusive household. Every category of abuse you can imagine."
"When I was 16 I was given a choice to either leave or go to foster care, so I packed what little I had and moved to another state. That was nearly 12 years ago."
"My relationship with my parents is strained at best, I rarely speak with either of them any more and I plan to change my legal full name and leave the country, so that I am not associated with them in any way, shape or form."
Keep your head on your shoulders. Have a plan. If it feels like you're set to be kicked out or, even worse, forced to leave for your own safety, start preparing.
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Like it or not, we've all met a liar or two. Some lies aren't so obvious either, and if the individual has a habit of lying regularly, then that's a sign that they could have a larger problem. Some lies are more innocent––we know those as "little white lies"––and typically don't harm anyone.
And some lies are just obvious and absurd––even entertaining. Why do people say these things? In truth (ha), the reasons might be complicated and the individual might not even be aware. We heard all about them after Redditor Mobile_Sturgeon asked the online community,
"What was the most obvious lie you've ever heard?"
"My friend told us..."
"My friend told us he was born mid-flight, and that it was on the exact border between Scotland and the USA, so he was half American, half Scottish."
This person has never looked at a map, have they?
"He then showed me..."
"My regular job is as a club promoter, I just work here [crappy retail franchise] for fun money." He then showed me a generic picture of a Ferrari and said that was his car.
Bonus lie, he told everyone he was 28 when he was clearly in his mid to late 40s."
"I stopped believing it..."
"My grandma got me to eat bread crusts when I was a toddler by telling me they're made of broccoli and cauliflower. I stopped believing it in a few months but it worked."
Ha! The creative little white lies that grandparents make up!
"My husband forgot..."
"My husband forgot to wake me up after promising me that he would. When I woke and realised that I may get late, I was pissed and asked him why he didn't wake me up as he'd promised, he told me that I was looking so cute, sleeping, that he didn't want to disturb me.
Well, after six years of togetherness, that is so obvious a cover-up for having forgotten something that I broke out laughing."
Oh, they totally forgot. But it sounds like you two are very much in love, so that's great!
"Aside from this bizarre quirk..."
"A guy at my local pub claimed to have written just about every popular song you could name, and when called out would get mad and come up with elaborate stories to explain how, for example, he had written "Stairway to Heaven" when he was 10 years old and been ripped off by Led Zeppelin.
Aside from this bizarre quirk, he seemed totally normal. Had a proper job and everything."
You meet some odd characters in pubs, but they're typically not hurting anyone, so leave it be.
"A friend of mine..."
"A friend of mine once told me a great story about something funny they did. It was hilarious.
Problem was, it was MY story. I had told it to him six months before. He told me the whole thing almost verbatim, only he had inserted himself where I had been in the story. I think that's my favorite."
"I had an employee..."
"I had an employee who was 45 minutes late to work and he told me with a straight face that he had to wait for a family of ducks to cross the road, and that's why he was late."
You have to admire his chutzpah, don't you? I cracked up at this.
"A friend I had in high school..."
"A friend I had in high school wanted me to come with her to Texas to visit her brother. Presumably, he was in a gang and had a million guns and robbed banks all the time. As if I've never seen a Western before.
Also she's adopted. She has a foster sister, a foster mom, and a pet dog named Snowball. I've been to her house. She has no brother."
"A girl I went to high school with..."
"A girl I went to high school with was neurotic about grades and rankings, etc. During the college application process, she was rejected from a school that accepted one of my close friends. We were discussing the school after class one day and this girl said 'Yeah, they rejected me but sent a letter saying they did it because I should go somewhere better given how strong my scores and grades are.'
That was very nice of them!"
Very nice of them, indeed! You'd think they'd be tripping all over themselves to have her!
"The more he spoke..."
"A security guard that works at a grocery store I once worked at said that he had been in Iceland. I asked him about the penguins he saw. He blabbed on about species of penguins that he created on the spot and that he was stationed there for military purposes. The more he spoke, the more the lie snowballed."
Pathological liars can benefit from psychotherapy, which can pose its own challenges because the liar isn't in control of their lying and could begin lying to their therapist.
"Treatment will depend on what the person needs and what they respond to during therapy sessions," as noted by WebMD. "Finding a qualified, experienced therapist who can work with someone over the long term is the key to managing the condition.
If you or a loved one needs help, seek help today.
Have stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below.
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