Getting rejected can hurt, but it's the sort of thing that happens to everyone and you're going to have a much better time in life if you have a sense of humor about it.
One reddit user asked:
and honestly a lot of the responses had people cracking up. There aren't a lot of signals any clearer than faking amnesia or an official "wristband of friendship."
So kick back and have a read and a cringe. And please, if you'e got a hilarious rejection story share it. I mean, I once had a dude move all the way to the other side of the country rather than just tell me he was done. My friends still laugh about how ridiculous that was, but that's a story probably best saved for a whole other article...
Camping And Consequences
We flirted for several weeks, hung out every day, I kept feeling a closer and closer connection but due to circumstances I could not control we were never alone enough together for me to test it. Had some friends plan a camping trip and I invited her and she said yes. I even specifically told her there's gonna be two couples there so we're gonna be in a tent just the two of us, she said yeah she knows.
Get to the trip, we have a few drinks and I ask her if she wants to take a walk with me to look at stars (I get it, it's corny, shut up.) Once we're a little away from everyone I tell her how much I like her and attempt to go in for a kiss.
NOPE: "Sorry...I'm not what you're looking for"
That shattered me; utterly gutted.
We ended up going to a different area that weekend, met another group and I ended up meeting a girl who actually was into me - which made the first girl act wildly jealous and leave.
An Ego 180
I was with 2 guy friends at our mall one time (years ago in jr. High). A small group of girls started following us. So we stopped and waited to see what they would do. Eventually 1 comes over and says that her and her friends think we're cute and can they have our numbers. I remember feeling pretty bad@ss just then - I didn't realize yet that I wasn't included lol.
So one buddy says he has a girlfriend (he did), girl looks at buddy #2 and he gives her his number. She says ok thanks and leaves. Didn't even look at me. Ego did a 180 that day. Lol
Deathfaint fainting GIF Giphy
I told em I had feelings for them they responded with
They followed it up with a joke about corona and pretended like I never said anything. Which to be honest hurts more than proper rejection, at least acknowledge it.
If It Aint Broke, Don't Fix It
Gave a girl at work my number on a piece of paper and she handed it right back and said "We talk at work all the time so let's keep doing that"
At least she was clear about it though...
That sucks, but gotta give it to her, she ripped off the band-aid fast, no ambiguity in that rejection.
Stopped texting first and realized that she never texted me for three days. It was totally one sided.
An actual girlfriend ran this experiment and found that I didn't text her for a week... some people are just sh*t (ie. me). My bf status didn't survive this experiment, but I learned from it.
I was 18, fun loving and carefree, and I've always had a poor grasp of passing time... I had no idea. We lived a 30min drive for her/60min bus for me apart, so it wasn't unusual to go a week without seeing each other. She suspected that she was the one driving the text conversations, and apparently she was absolutely correct.
I was soooo into this girl, and it sucks that I made her think otherwise. I'm 35 now, and we're still friends. I'm very happily married, in no small part due to some post-break up coaching from the first girl on how to be a better human.
My roommate encouraged me to ask this girl out. He said she really liked me.
So I ask her out and set a dinner date. I pick her up and at dinner, she barely responds to me. I ask questions about her major, her family, etc and all I get back are short answers and no follow up. I'm frustrated and she's unhappy and I guess we both look miserable when the waitress tells us that we need to perk up and be happy!
She then asks how long we've been dating. Her face falls when I tell her this is the first date she goes "Oh..." and walks away and doesn't really talk to us again.
After dinner, we were supposed to go to a friend's house who was having a party but I look at her in the car and say "Look, obviously neither one of us had a good time. Instead of going to the party why don't I take you back to your dorm?" She said yeah and that was it.
The waitress really did put her foot in her mouth but it was good for me to hear that "Yes, yes this is a horrible date and it's obvious to other people too. Time to cut your loses and go home."
I went back to my roommate FURIOUS and asked him why he thought she had a crush on me. He said he thought she would catch a crush on me once she got to know me, making me realize he hadn't even talked to her.
Yeah, well she didn't.
She gave me a thin paper wristband she has made which said "the wristband of friendship". Like literally printed on it.
This is the best one by far. Sorry but also thank you. I might have not even been upset 'cause it's just so funny.
I feel like if it got that far for you to realize she wasn't into you then you probably deserve the blunt message at least a little bit since whatever else she tried obviously wasn't working.
Oh snap. So, last fall I went to class and ran into this really cute girl and I thought "hey, I'm gonna try to talk to her more" and over the next 2 weeks I found 0 openings until we were told to get into groups for a project. Small class, but I wasn't in her group so I asked her if it was cool if I joined her group because they seemed more serious than my other group. (Bunch of losers)
She said yes. So it was me, her best friend and another girl I'd talked to for a bit. We agreed to meet up on Friday at the library. We talked a bit more before then and became friends. She's really touchy so she'd grab my arm, lean on me etc. I thought she was into me. I show up early and she was there alone so we began to talk and she's sooo much like me. Has a weird sense of humor, very smart, and super friendly. She even liked Dragonball. That's the dream!
Then the other two girls arrive and I see her phone and her lock screen is of her best friend. The other girl comments "Aww, your best friends your lock screen?" And she says "nope, my girlfriends my lock screen"
So that really made me realize she totally wasn't interested in me at all.
Funny thing is, we all are still really good friends. We've tried to take classes together and she's helped me out when I had trouble. I accidentally ruined her surprise birthday party, we hung out while we could, she'd buy us lunch, invite us to her place and we really have a good time together. Those 3 girls are the best friends I've made in university.
It's kinda sad but before I went like 6 months without anyone in college saying my name or even talking to me. They weren't mean. They were just not my friends. But I met these girls and I have a friend network, I have a constant study group and she's even helping me lose weight because I couldn't do it on my own.
She wasn't into me but I honestly couldn't care less. I'm way happier now than I was before I met her.
Amnesiamusic video amnesia GIF by Vevo Giphy
I have to tell this because it's hilarious and I know for a fact it's true because I witnessed it.
A girl I know was dating a guy who turned out to be married. The wife found out but stayed with the husband. So the guy gets in a car accident and the side chick girl calls to see if he's ok.
The dude tells her he has amnesia and doesn't remember her and he's with his wife now. Homeboy done said he got amnesia to get rid of the side chick!
I was in a club and wanted to go to the bathroom. He kept pulling me back into his lap. I tried to explain and he wouldn't listen. So I peed in his lap
When I accidentally let a fart slip as we got out of the car to her crib and then suddenly had to sleep in the guest room.
Let Me Stop You Right There
Female colleague at the beer garden: "Awww, cute. But let me stop you right there. You are more like a cute little brother."
She was 28-29, I was 21-22. It didn't hurt as much as I thought/excepted. Still in contact with her.
Kinda sorta on topic, but 180 degrees different:
I once lived with this very beautiful woman, and my dad, who hadn't visited much, suddenly started visiting me once a month (flying his plane to the local airport). I thought, great...it's good to get to hang out more. When that relationship ended, suddenly and immediately dad stopped flying there to see me. So...yeah, I found out my dad definitely wasn't into me, just my girlfriend.
Not a girl, cos gay etc. But heard this guy I worked with had a crush on me, which was awesome cos I always liked him but didn't think I had a chance as I was about 8 years older.
We went on a few dates and got on really well, looked like it was going somewhere until I dropped my age into a conversation and saw the horrified look on his face. Turns out his roommate told him I was MUCH younger than I actually was and from that point on it was pretty clear it was going nowhere.
On the plus side, found out I still look young af 👍
Almostits happening almost famous GIF Giphy
I asked a girl out to see a movie and she turned up with a female friend. I only had two tickets, and this was a very nice movie theatre so the seats were allocated . I bought another one, but it was now late, so the seat was at the back...and yes, that's the one I sat in.
She called me later and said 'they had tried to find me..' but from my crows nest seat I had seen them leave. They had quickly walked straight to the exit, not even looking back.
I can't see 'Almost Famous' without feeling that same disappointment.
I had never been dumped, I was always the one to end it. So the first time it happened I didn't even realize it.
It was only while clearing an email inbox, running across an old message from someone I had left, recognizing the language—someone else had been saying all the same things to me that I had been saying to this other girl.
...Oh—I am being ghosted! And I'm acting like one of those clingy "psycho" girls I used to date...
...Oh—being ghosted sucks. Those girls were not psycho, I am just a terrible person...
Opened my eyes. Hard. Not just snapping to the fact that the girl I loved did not want to be with me (ouch)
But also that I had done the same thing to so many girls without even realizing (yikes)
So not just hurt, shock, embarrassment but also shame on top; a real seven-layer burrito of trash.
In the long run it made me a better person. When it came time to end things in later relationships, from either direction, I handled it better.
...too bad I didn't realize it before I spiraled and burnt a bunch more bridges... sigh
After taking her out to dinner, having a great time, making out with her and slowly our clothes came off and... she was super super dry.
I noticed she had an odd expression on her face. Like you lost a loved one or had your heart broken -and then I realized everything like the end of a SAW movie:
She didn't really get over her ex-fiance who died of cancer a year before.
I knew her for 10 years and I always had a crush on her too! Out of circumstance we just both were always seeing someone else. We were never single at the same time.
I just hated how it fell so flat lol. UGH.
Actually initiated the hug for once and she tensed up, recoiled and let out a little yelp. I think about that girl all the time. She was the perfect height for me to rest my chin on her head when I hugged her. I wish I was less awkward back then.
Addition By Subtraction
When my 60 year old female neighbor and close "friend "of 5 years told me not to come near her after I got the flu shot, but wanted to hang out during the Covid-19 quarantine. She then went after another man.
Addition by subtraction. There were many other quirks like ADD, germophobia, possible bipolar and others - but that was the last straw. Too much baggage for an attractive woman that age which; explains why she was never married.
A Crumb Of A Hint
Uhhh once me and a guy i was friends with kept matching on dating apps, and we would be playful and I would ask him to hang out and he would say he's down. Once I ran into him at a bar and sat with him awhile and he looked at me deeply and said, "You know, I think about you a lot."
And idk he was drunk so I didnt want to make a move when he wasnt sober, but I told him the same and we flirted a little. Then on Instagram i got bold once and called him attractive and flirted, and all he did was "like" the message, so I just stopped. If I cant tell if they return an interest, and if they're not making any obvious indications, why would I even want them?
Part of dating is wanting to feel wanted. I genuinely really liked him for a few years, even before the dating apps. But if someone wants you, you shouldn't feel confused about it. You should have more than a crumb of a hint.
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Cities. Those things we live in.
What city would you never, ever, EVER live in?
These places, while inhabited by a good number of people, aren't exactly the kind of spots you would want to go back to on a repeat visit.
Transformed Into Something Unsettling
"For me, it's Mecca. It's beautiful, but it's just not for an openly gay Western dude like me."
"Same with Tehran."
"Im surprised you think Mecca is beautiful lol. I, along with almost every Muslim I know, hates what has happened to that place. The skyscrapers are extremely ugly (especially that goddam clock tower) and overshadow the beauty of the mosque. Almost all historical sites are gone except for the Kabah. I know they need infrastructure to handle all the people but they did it in the worst way possible."
"Mecca like almost every other Arabian city has turned into places for rich Saudis to show their wealth and almost nothing else."
"Irvington, NJ - My friend told me to run through every red light and not stop at any cost after I dropped her off at her apartment. Her wise words phased me as I stopped at the first red light. 3 seconds later a huge motherf-cker with a crowbar starts heading in my direction. 3 red lights all while screaming toward McCarter Highway."
"The following week my car was stolen while I was attending classes in Newark and they used my car to rob a liquor store in Irvington, NJ. Literally only owned my car for 2 weeks."
"F-ck Irvington, NJ."
The Literal Fast And The Furious
"Cairo, Egypt. 19 million people, 23 million cars, no stoplights. On a 3 lane road, you have 5 lanes of traffic, left shoulder, straddling first white line, middle lane, straddling 2nd white line, and right shoulder! When we visited, our tour guide told us we needed 3 things to drive there…"good brakes, good horns & good nerves!"
Cars are bumper to bumper, and then people are crossing the street in between the cars, walking, in wheelchairs, pushing baby strollers! Then along beside our bus, comes someone riding a donkey! Crazy. Soldiers with machine guns on the street corners, we even had an armed guard on our tour bus."
Then there are some cities, some you might never have visited, which have generated enough discussion and gotten enough publicity to be actively awful in your mind. You don't have to have gone there to know you never want to be there.
A Place To Skip Completely
"Mumbai. Even if I was financially secure, I couldn't stand seeing all the poverty and squalor all the time. It would weigh on me."
"A friend of a friend spent six months riding his motorcycle from London to Chennai. He recorded everything in his journal in excruciating detail except for Mumbai. There was only one sentence about Mumbai. It was about driving around Mumbai. He did everything you could imagine on the way, but decided to skip Mumbai completely."
Not All Of It. Just Some Of It.
"Paris. I used to hate all French people because of my experiences there, and then I met one who explained that there's basically two Frances; Paris and everywhere else, and then we bonded over bad mouthing the place and now my antipathy is more precise."
It's All In The Family
"LA, if you want half quality people, air, and living for double the price and problems, it might be for you"
"I have friends who live in LA, and swear it's awesome. But they actually live in Rancho Palos Verdes, in their parent's mansions."
And then there's cities like these.
Cities so bad an introduction isn't required.
What's Your Excuse?
"The Simpsons summed it up perfectly: "We were born here, what's your excuse?"
"I can laugh at this because I'm from Thunder Bay"
Booze. Sex. Sin. All The Best Family Values.
"Las Vegas. Fun to visit, but not where I'd want to raise my family."
"I think my first realization that people grow up and live in Las Vegas was at 16 or so when watching Criminal Minds and hearing that Spencer Reid grew up there. It was that record scratch moment. Wait, people LIVE IN and raise their babies in the city of sex, sin, and gambling? I felt stupid, of course, upon realizing that all the casino workers and strippers have to live somewhere, and might fall in love, and might marry and have kids."
"And then I had a second life-changing revelation when I realized people probably feel the exact same way about my home city, Miami. I was raised there and lived there for 2 decades. A lot of people have no concept of Miami outside TV and probably think my parents are horrible people who raised me in a den of yachts, Pitbull, cocaine, dirty money, bad boob jobs, and spring breakers. Meanwhile I actually lived in a very normal and boring suburb."
A Slow Decline Over Time
"Gary Indiana. Went through there when heading to O'hare & was not impressed. heard multiple gunshots when driving through."
"So I literally learned about Gary, Indiana from these threads where it always pops up as one of the worst places to live or be. Could you explain why it is so sh-tty?"
"Long story made short, Gary was a good place to live. Nice paying steel industry jobs. That went away. High crime rate, high poverty rate, and empty, falling down buildings everywhere. I used to live in Chicago and would avoid Gary when traveling at all cost."
Each city is different. What works for some might not be what works for others.
However, it does feel like some of these cities need to be at the top of your "Never Visit" list, don't they?
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Sex is fun. Sex is healthy. Sex should be enjoyed and always consensual. But often, sex can be dangerous, especially when you're trying out new things, like a new location.
Who hasn't thought about upping the adrenaline ante when it comes to sexytime? We've all been there. But some ideas really should just stay ideas.
Why break a hip or an arm just to make things a little more saucy? Just try a different room in the house, or the backyard, but bring bug spray.
And some areas in public are safety hazards for a reason.
Redditor u/playfulinvestment01 wanted to know about all the places we need to avoid when it's sexytime, by asking:
What is the worst place you had sex?
I can tell you from experience that airplanes are not a good idea. Don't ask me how I know. A lady never kisses and tells, but highlights are ok. There will never be enough room and the movies are lying.
Like Glue...Melissa Mccarthy Falling GIFGiphy
"I lived in Australia for a bit and our studio had this black pleather couch. It looked exactly like that casting couch meme so we tried it for fun once. My ex sweats a lot even when it's not 40C out, but it was and we stuck to the couch like glue."
"On a hike in a wildlife refuge. We went off the trail to a more remote area. Was all fun and games tell I got stung on the penis. Was after the event had ended when I was briefly exposed, the little moron went right at me. We joke about it regularly, I'd say it comes up monthly. Just out of the blue she will say "hey remember when you got stung on your penis?" Yes, I remember and will never forget."
Up a Tree
"A "treehouse" that was actually a plywood shack on 6' stilts. It was pretty old and the plywood was splintery, so he laid down an old towel for me (you know, like a gentleman.) Also it was too small for me to fit in any direction, so my head stuck out the door. I stared at the sky and just... And that's the story of how I lost my virginity! A close second would be the bed in his semi-abandoned house full of the semi-abandoned hoarded belongings of his mother. But that's a different story."
"Met a girl online and we tried to do it at the park. A cop showed up before we started and told us we had to leave. We went back to our cars which was at a small shopping mall. We went behind the shopping mall and got it on behind a dumpster. It worked out well so we met up there again a week later. Except that time, as we were walking away, a dump truck picked the dumpster to empty the trash. Was hilarious at the time but frightening looking back on it. This was about 10 years ago."
Keyed OffPiano Performing GIFGiphy
"I don't recommend on top of a piano. Very uncomfortable and not at all the experience we envisioned."
Scratchy...Screaming The Voice GIF by NBCGiphy
"Bottom of cliff next to the ocean. Turns out I have an allergic reaction to coral and my back was scratched the hell up from it. It was windy, wet, and itchy. Runner up is a movie theatre."
"In a literal smoke house... lost my virginity with about 50 rings of deer sausage hanging around to dry. My friend and his dad were gone and we were like "this seems like a great place!" At least when I went home I smelled like venison instead of sex."
"I'm not sure if this counts because we didn't get very far. But In a Burger King parking lot… He had a car, so we would park it someplace and hook up in the tiny little two-seater. I was sitting astride him and most of my clothes were off when he froze. I looked over my shoulder and the once abandoned parking lot was abandoned no more. A family of four were just staring at us through the windshield. We didn't know what to do so I just put my shirt back on and we drove away."
"we can hear everything"
"My childhood house had an enclosed porch that was level with my parents' bedroom window (it's hard to explain). You couldn't see into the porch from the window, but if the porch windows were open and the bedroom windows were open you could hear everything from either room."
"So my now husband and I were trying to have sex in that porch, having opened the windows cuz it was hot AH. My parents usually never opened their window and it was past ten, when they usually went to sleep. We weren't trying to be loud, but apparently we were."
"After we were done, I checked my phone and I had 5 missed calls and a text from my mother saying "we can hear everything" and "please at least use a condom". We didn't acknowledge it at the time but my mom got drunk a few years ago and told my aunt the story and said she was worried she was hearing the conception of her grandchild."
Ivy!jerry seinfeld help GIF by HULUGiphy
"After a drunken night on 6th st in Austin, girl and I were walking down red river st, she drags me in this bushy grassy area, we go at it, finish, call an Uber to west campus, continue going at it. The next day, we are super itchy, come to find later it was poison ivy, got it all over our genitals. Fun times. 10/10 would do it again though."
Also, be careful when and if you do it on a bus. You're never fully out of the driver's line of sight. Don't ask me how I know, I just do. Be careful out there but have fun.
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Being a parent is one of the greatest challenges you'll face.
What did your parents do to you that made you promise that you would never do that to your own children?
You won't be in charge of your child forever. At some point, they're going to go out into the larger world, interact with other people, and suddenly all those little tics and quirks they developed at home will start to hamper their social progress.
Never Able To Hit The Pick-Up Time
"They always had me late or last minute to everything. I'll never do that to my kids because, having it done to me, I know it's all the parents fault."
"That feeling, when you are the last kid to be picked up after a school event that they didn't attend, and my teacher asking if I called, and if she said she was on her way, and how far away we lived, and then a big sigh while we continued to wait, in the dark, outside school, after everyone else has gone home, and me just wanting to disappear."
Forcing Them To Miss Out
"I was never allowed to hang out with friends outside of school. I had to go straight home and couldn't stay and hang out or go over to friends houses after school or on weekends. This went well into my senior year of high school. It sucked constantly feeling like I was missing out growing up."
Definition Of Overprotection
"Isolate them from the world."
"Growing up I see now that they wanted to protect me from how sh-tty things were, but now I feel a useless idiot. If I would've known as a kid that I had violent gang-related family, addicts, or that we were on welfare I could've found a desire to do better."
Taking on the care and responsibility of raising another human being to be a smart, compassionate, and well-meaning member of society shouldn't be easy. It should be a challenge.
Downplaying Their Accomplishments
"My parents never thought anything I did was a big deal. I LOVED art class but I remember showing my mom artwork and she'd tell me she could make that herself, ok thanks."
"Ouch, this brought back a painful memory. I always loved to sing but I was shy. I was also bullied and made fun of quite a bit. In highschool I finally joined choir and it helped me come into my own. I won first place awards at State Solo and Ensemble competition, student of the year in choir and even the Directors Award which was the highest honor given. My mom came to none of my performances. Not until Senior Night when I was the only performer singing a solo. I did the cliche song...Memory from the musical Cats. I got a standing ovation!"
"People who would typically refuse to speak to me approached me to tell me that they never would've dreamed I had that big, powerful, voice in me. I was just about floating with happiness and pride when I walked up to my mom and asked her what she thought. Her face twisted like she'd bit a lemon and she wiped out all my good feelings with the words, "Well, it probably isn't a good song for you. You sound like you were ATTEMPTING to sing opera and it's not supposed to sound like that."
Saying They Don't Quite Stack Up
"Compare them to other kids!!"
"This needs to be higher up. It's soooo insidious. Undermines so much about you, engenders the tendency for you to compare yourself to others, makes you needlessly resent the people they compare you to, but most of all, creates a sense that you'll never measure up or be 'good enough', not just for them, but in general."
Unable To Keep Their Minds At Peace
"The amount of anxiety I have/had from money related things is ridiculous. We were never poor, we were broke they just made bad decision after bad decision putting us in a stupid amount of debt"
Perhaps the most important part to remember when raising a child some adults might forget: You are the adult. Deal with your adult matters and let your child be a child. Don't bring them into your petty squabbles or unresolved affairs.
"My parents refused to address issues between my sister and myself. They hate conflict, so it was easier for them to guilt me into doing whatever my sister wanted and then praise me for being "good" than to ever put her in line. Being praised for always giving up what you want can really mess you up."
Lashing Out At The Other
"My parents were divorced since before I can remember. They did not get along very well when I was a kid. There was one weekend in particular where on the way to drop me off my Dad told me "whatever you do, don't end up like your Mother." Get home to Mom, she tells me "whatever you do, don't end up like your Dad." Best advice either of them ever gave me."
Asking The Child To Be The Adult
"They made their problems into problems for the whole family."
"They pulled us into everything. That's not fair to a kid. F-ck, I was straight out asked to fix things between them sometimes. No kid should be even the remotest bit responsible for their parent's relationship or fixing things that are wrong between them. That's f-cked up."
"We all have problems. We're human. No one expects perfection. But if you have a problem with your wife/husband? Don't bring the kid into it. Don't make it the kids' problem. Don't make the pain of the household -- which they're going to feel anyway -- somehow the kid's fault."
Don't want kids? Don't have kids.
Want kids? Be prepared to do everything you can to make sure that child has a supportive, strong upbringing. Don't let the mistakes of the past become the present.
Animated movies meant for children have been known to sneak in a few dirty jokes here and there. After all, the parents have to sit through the movies with the kids too.
These "Easter eggs" can be found in virtually every movie meant for kids. It may go over our heads when we watch at age 10, but years later when we re-watch to enjoy a bit of nostalgia, we realize just how raunchy the creators were.
It's not just old movies from the 90s or early 2000s, some movies as recent as Frozen 2 have some moments of adult centered levity.
Redditor Pooky135790 wanted to know:
"What are the best adult jokes that are hidden in kids movies?"
These scenes really had us rolling.
Shrek definitely has a few innuendos.
"In Shrek talking about Snow White:"
"'Although she lives with 7 other men, she's not easy.'"
"Gets me every time!"
"The whole Duloc opening scene with the singing puppets. 'Please keep off of the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your…….face.'"
"Also in Shrek: when they get to Farquuad's castle, they note the large size of it, and Shrek asks if Farquuad is compensating for something."
"Kids will think it's a joke about his height."
"Adults will think it's a joke about his other kind of height."Giphy
Cars had plenty of jokes.
"In Cars when the two Miata ladies flash their pop-ups at McQueen"
"I didn't realize for years that that was the connotation."
"Look at that scene again and look at the photographers behind Mia."
"It took me a second but I think the one directly in the middle is zooming in on their posteriors lmfao."
- -Paintlightning mcqueen car GIF by Disney PixarGiphy
"Also the Piston Cup. 'He did what in his cup?!' Funny enough 10 year old me got that and my dad didn't."
Robots had it's fair share of moments.
"In Robots the [father of the] main character and his wife get the parts for their robot child and exclaim, 'Making the baby's the fun part!'"
"Also the old lady bot, Aunt Fanny, has a lot of junk in her trunk."
"There is that one scene from Ratatouille, when Linguini is about to confess about how Remy is in his hat cooking for him, and says 'I... have... a little... tiny...' and right after he says tiny, Collette quickly glances down at his pants. I never even noticed it until someone pointed it out to me because it is pretty subtle and can be easy to miss."
"Seriously the best dick joke in a kid's movie."
"That and the time when the short lil chef guy catches linguini in the pantry and says, 'One can become to familiar with vegetables, you know!'"Giphy
Coco really went there!
"In Coco, everybody laughs when they say Hector died 'choking on chorizo.'"
"'Choking on chorizo' is Mexican slang for sucking d*ck."
"I mean the song Hector sings to his dying friend has the implied, but not spoken, lyrics: 'And her tits they drag on the floor...' (he says 'knuckles' but the guy shouts, 'those aren't the words!')."
What a forgotten gem Monster House was.
"'That's it's uvula!' 'Oh.... So it's a girl house....'"
"Rick and Morty gets a lot of hate around here because of the sh*tty fan base, but Dan Harmon is a genuinely funny writer."
"Could not BELIEVE Dan Harmon was a writer on this 'til I googled Monster House; your point is a good one lol."
Even in Frozen.
"'Foot size doesn't matter' - when Anna from Frozen talks about her fiancé."
"Frozen 2, 'I like you better in leather anyway' when Kristoff dresses up for Anna at the end."
"My boyfriend and roommate and I all watched it and all three of us spat our drinks at that and we all did the 'Did we just hear what we think we heard?' look. Then we laughed for like 10 solid minutes."
Not a movie, but still good.
"There was an episode of Dexter's laboratory where the father kept going on about Dexter's mother's muffin, and saying he only married her for her muffin. The whole episode was filled with innuendo."
"'Your father is a muffin fiend, a muff-o-maniac, just the aroma can make him crazy.' Lol. Had to see it for myself."
"Season 2 ep 18 The Muffin King."
"There was the episode about DeeDee and Dexter having decoder rings! DeeDee says Dexter's club is for big 'I-D-K-S-C' Dexter decodes it, gasps, and says he's gonna tell mom. Lol."Giphy
Children's shows may be for kids entertainment, but they're created by adults. No doubt they're going to slip in a few naughty jokes here and there.
Time to re-watch some old favorites and see what we missed when we were younger.