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...You know, sometimes, men just miss the mark. By a lot.

Expect an overabundance of facepalms while reading the following entries.


Reddit user, u/Nermal666, wanted to know what men need to keep their ears open for when they asked:

Guys, what is the most obvious hint from a girl you've missed?

*facepalm

Her: " do you have a girlfriend"

me: "no" (just typing this hurts me she was super cute)

her: "lol really that's so suprising, I don't have a boyfriend"

me: "lol"

MyHeadHurtsRn

*nutty facepalm

Giphy

A girl literally confessed her feelings directly to me and I didn't hear it cause I zoned out looking at a squirrel

burningfreedom4

*camping facepalm

I was fifteen or sixteen, camping with some friends, no parents. Met a girl, who said I could stay in her tent that night.

"No, that's ok, I already have a place to sleep"

DrColossusOfRhodes

*bathroom facepalm

When I was drunkenly flirting with a girl (I never flirt and I'm horrible with girls in general so didn't think I was getting anywhere) and asked her where the bathroom was. She said 'I'll show you' then came in with me and asked what I wanted to do.

Awfully confused I says 'well I want to have a piss, you'll have to leave'.

She said 'oh' and left

Took me about 6 months before I figured that one out

DwaynesMountain

*last day of school facepalm

In 8th grade there was this blonde girl about as tall as I was. Everyday she asked for a hug from Me and I thought it was like how girls hug eachother in a friend way and that she didnt exactly see me as masculine.

Her friend told me on the last day that the girl really liked me the whole time and I just let out a loud "Ohhhhhhhhhhh" in the quiet classroom. I feel a little dumb now but now their conversation in the background made way more sense

Planktillimdank

*press play facepalm

A girl once burned me a mix CD of almost nothing but love songs. My guy friends and I held a small conference where we listened to the CD in full and tried to see if there was some hidden message there.

We came up with a solid maybe.

There were 6 of us debating this.

justaspacecowboy

*cousin facepalm

I have always had a crush on this girl.

We started texting a bit fir a few months and she says "I love you". I did not reply back for two hours and she later says it was her cousin who texted. Even before she texted this she gave a lot of hints.

F-ck I still regret it

owbun

*daddy facepalm

I'mma just say. The "obvious hint" isn't a hint sometimes... I know because. Well. Mine wasn't

I met this girl in middle school and we hit it off right away. We talked all the time, we called, texted 24/7. She was cute and... honestly. Out of my league. In Highschool we had this stupid joke we started where she'd call me daddy all the time. People told me constantly after that, that she had a thing for me. I didn't think so. But people always pointed out how we hugged all the time and even held hands sometimes. So they told me to ask her out... and I did

She told me she only thinks of me as a friend, then stopped being my friend because "it's weird now"... yeah. I miss her sometimes but I honestly don't blame her. I shouldn't have said anything :(

AnOrdinaryMaid

*homework facepalm

She would stare at me constantly during class and we would even occasionally lock eyes. I just thought there was something interesting behind me even though there was only a plain wall behind me.

Then, once in Biology, we were allowed to sit next to whoever we wanted to. My best friend came over to sit next to me but couldn't because she had sat there. Then, my friend jokingly said, "Just because you want to sleep him doesn't mean you get to sit next to him instead of me."

She then replied, "I do actually." Meanwhile, my dumb self just sat there thinking about the homework I had forgotten to do. The whole lesson was filled with her 'accidentally' brushing my hand and her blushing afterwards.

Turns out, she wasn't joking and I completely missed it.

riley560

*too baked to facepalm

I was super baked hanging out with some friends, including these girls who were into me, and I asked where the bathroom was. One of the girls said she'd show me, and when we got to the bathroom, she asked if I needed any help.

I was too high to comprehend so I gave her a weird look and said "uh no..." and shut the door. As I was peeing I realized the mistake I made :(

donttrustjeffery

*high school facepalm

I was in high school, and there was this girl that went out of her way to make sure I remembered her name (the orchestra and band rooms were right next to each other and she'd always come and talk to me and point out her name). After school, she'd be at my locker just waiting to talk with me.

I noticed that she would appear at my track and lacrosse practices/games. She'd also move any girls who were near me out of the way so she could constantly walk with me in the halls. I honestly thought nothing of it all.

I didn't see her until 15 years later. The day before I got married, I was driving through my hometown and saw her outside. I parked and spoke with her for a few minutes. She actually pointed out all of those things and boy did I feel stupid. She ended it all by saying that it sounds like I'm marrying a great girl and everything apparently does happen for a reason.

VirginKingBehe

*texting fail facepalm

Her: Do you have girlfriend?
Me: Nope.
Her: Let me help you with that. *sends number*
Me: Thanks!

Idiot me at 18 (29 now) thought she meant I could call her whenever to have support in my loneliness. Really liked her too, so I'm still beating myself up for not getting the more than obvious hint.

SwedishRobotFish

*hey facepalm

She kept messaging me on facebook. Literally the start of our whole conversation was basically just her typing "hey" 50 times on 50 different days, sometimes interlaced with one word responses on my part. Her friends also kept asking what I thought about her, and I was still none the wiser.

Chef_Chantier

*cheating facepalm

Yikes. I have so many of these. Here is one:

9th grade. We have seating arrangements that change every new term. I sit on the edge of a rectangular table and next to me sits a cute girl from orchestra class (We both played the violin). One day she tells me she always likes how she can talk to me. I don't know what to do so I mutter an awkward "yeah ok".


A few days later it is a new term and everybody changes seats. Everybody but me and Orchestra girl. I suspect something up so I ask her why we never moved. She gets all awkward and tells me that sitting next to me helps her grades and so she requested the teacher to keep us together. What do I do? Approach the teacher after class and tell her that I suspect Orchestra girl is cheating off of me. The teacher laughs at me and tells me not to worry.

It clicks. . . two years later. I still feel the shame.

jdieterbusche

*punch yourself in the face facepalm

So it's grade eight, were having a dance to celebrate us going to highschool. this girl I know asks me to find her a date, she says she wants a guy who's tall and has brown hair

"hmmm sounds like me"

aeveryone tells me she's trying to get me to ask her and I thought they were BS-ing me, tenth grade rolls around and apparently she had a huge crush on me...

I was punching myself for weeks afterwards.

IAteMyInfantSon

*eventually gets it facepalm

Her: Do you have a girlfriend?

Me: No...no one would date me anyway.

Her: I'd date you.

Me: Thanks, but you don't need to pity me.


Her: I would date you

Me: Thanks but...

Her: Are you free on Saturday?

Me: Surprised Pikachu face

And we're going on two years in October

FlaxinWaxin

*happily ever after facepalm

Me posting on Facebook: "anyone wanna go hiking this weekend?"

Cute girl: "I'll go."

After a long hike and dinner, I still didn't know I was on a date until I was dropping her off. Seriously thought we were just hiking. We're married now.

72scott72

Society definitely teaches men some really cruel and unrealistic things about women. It ends up warping their attitudes and later affects the relationships they develop (or try to develop, in other cases). Men are also taught that women are crappy communicators, or simply don't communicate at all. Perhaps that contributes to men's behavior around women, which can come off the wrong way. It can seem entitled at best, frightening or violent at worst.

After Redditor rocketbot99 asked the online community, "Men who used to be creepy around women and stopped, what made you change your ways?" men shared their stories.

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Image by HISdesign from Pixabay

Parenting is a lifelong commitment.

My mother still marvels at how fast I grew up, and I know she was very much taken aback by the (first) time I moved out. I was 20 then and honestly, she would have been fine if I'd stayed indefinitely. Did she ever think, watching me take my first steps, that the years would fly by and that one day she'd be helping me move across the country? I'm sure she did. But that doesn't mean she was entirely prepared.

After Redditor amberarmy1912 asked the online community, "Parents, what surprised you the most when your child moved out?" people shared their stories.

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Image by F1 Digitals from Pixabay

Students who have not prepared for an exam somehow have the energy to devise a plan to cheat.

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Image by Pexels from Pixabay

Sometimes the things that come out of peoples' mouths are truly astounding. It makes you wonder, where did things go wrong? Why are they like this? As Forrest Gump once said, “stupid is as stupid does".

Here are a few of the most jaw-dropping lay stupid things that have been said by actual human beings. Not aliens trying to figure out how humans communicate--ACTUAL human beings. Thanks, Reddit.

U/cperr310 asked: What's the dumbest thing you or someone you know has said?



First up, what better people to hear ridiculous claims from than children? Here are some people that even teachers couldn’t help.

Well, that’s awkward.

I was in 5th grade like 20 years ago, and I am a male which is important later. My school changed an extra girls locker room into a computer lab. When my class got to go check it out, I say "wow, it looks so different!".

Everyone looks at me like I'm a creep. What I meant to say was "wow it looks so different that the boys locker room!" I still think about this when trying to fall asleep more often than I'm comfortable with.

Xeeke

....no. No it’s not.

War Guy GIF Giphy

In my Spanish class where they were talking about Spanish countries

"What about Syria...isn't Syria Spanish?"

Worst part... NOBODY called her out on it to the point I was questioning myself. The professor had good English but it wasn't her first language and she dodged her question saying she's only going over countries in south america. I had to literally write myself a note that she literally asked that question. Then I got paired up with her like 10 minutes later for a group activity and I still wasn't over this question lol

Papapsie

Fake but also real but also demonic?

A kid in high school tried to convince me that men had an extra rib and that the earth is only a few thousand years old. Same kid said that ouija boards were full of magnets and gears which made them fake, yet they were simultaneously completely real and needed to be burned on sight to prevent demonic possession.

HotelRoom5172648B

But sometimes it’s the parents of children who say the dumb stuff.

Back in 2014 I still vividly remember we were eating dinner, and my brother is chewing with his mouth open while my sister is talking. My dad, still thinking about her talking but talking to my brother said "Talk with your mouth closed." and my sister just went silent immediately.

Starr_fall

Stupid can turn into ignorant really quickly. Here are a few examples of the not-so-harmless kind of dumb statements.​

Fun fact: they don’t use the US Constitution in New Zealand. Who knew?

angela rye guns GIF by Third Rail with OZY Giphy

After the church shooting in New Zealand, they banned guns. My coworker said that they can't do that since it violates the second amendment. We live in California.

Onbakeplatinum

Everyone knows New Zealand is the state below New Canada.

Rysilk

Uhhhhh that’s racist af.

Not to me but my husband.

He had to take an uber home from the Naval Base in San Diego (car was getting fixed) and the guy who picked my husband up was from Pakistan and they had small talk, telling him how he moved over here etc, dude was pretty cool.

My dumbass half sister whom we were staying with for a bit told him straight to his face, "Oh since you're military he probably wanted to like... murder you."

...What a f*cking ignorant, racist thing to say.

HelloxOctober

Just gonna leave this one here....

"And then I see the disinfectant where it knocks it out in a minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside, because you see it gets in the lungs, so it would be interesting to check that out."

The_questcoast

Well that’s a new one.

A trans friend got "You're registered as a man here, so I need to hear a male voice to complete the verification of your acount."

Not the first time the cable company pulled this 'female' account 'female' voice / 'male' account 'male' voice crap. But that one time was on a whole other level.

Tricky_Ad_8459

But most of the time, dumb statements are harmless, and make for a good story down the line.​

I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face either.

alvin and the chipmunks GIF by 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment Giphy

A few questions I've heard come to mind, I'm not sure which is the best/worst.

A few years ago my mom, in her 60s at the time, asked me if chipmunks grow up to be squirrels. Have you ever tried to keep a straight face while explaining to the grown-ass woman who was responsible for keeping you alive for ~18 years that chipmunks and squirrels are different animals?

In high school during a Spanish class as student asked "Do Spanish-speaking people think in Spanish?" After being told yes, her follow-up question was "Are they born speaking Spanish?" The teacher kept a straight face explaining that foreign language speakers learn their language the same as the student learned English, but there were a lot of other students laughing and brutally mocking her.

Relikter

Ah yes, the two types of guitars.

Dumbest thing I ever asked was, "do you prefer playing electric or air guitar?" I really meant to say acoustic, like my dad's.

Yankstraveler

Air guitar. I don't know how to play the acoustic or electric guitars, but I never get a wrong note on the air guitar.

CCC_037

Did you change your birthday?

At the bank.

Teller: Is your phone number still 123-4567?

Me: Yes

T: Is your address still 123 Easy st?

M: Yes

T: Is your birthday still 01/01/2000?

M: laughing I sure as hell hope so

That_one_air_guy

I can't even make fun of these. One time I asked my husband where the Newport Ferry sailed to.

Newport, obviously.

I think we all have slip-ups in our brains sometimes. It's part of being human, and hey, they stay alive as inside jokes for generations to come