Men and women have their quirks. So how do some of these lovable traits - like the sea of hair ties in the house, or grabbing his favorite hoodie and never returning it - register with guys? Men, because we're fair here Knowable, your turn to get read happens in the discussion following the list.
Saculu asked guys of Reddit: What are some weird things that almost every girl does but they don't realize?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
15. Hot sleepers.
Most of the girls I've been with complain about feeling cold all the time but when they are asleep it's like they go into oven self clean mode and I need to scooch away.
Not especially cold during the day, but I regularly wake up absolutely drenched in sweat, with clothes that are visibly wet. Not fun.
14. Clothing thieves.
Stealing my clothes. Every GF/FB ive ever had made off with at least 1 piece of my clothing.
Girls always know how to spot your fav shorts/hoodie/and t-shirt too. I wish they stole the stuff I don't wear...
13. Living in a sea of hair ties.
Touching one thing and suddenly 4 things disappear or leaving hair ties everywhere.
Hair ties have a life expectancy of one day, maybe two max.
12. There's a method to the madness.
When it's picture time they all strike a very specific pose. Usually it's subtle like a hand on the hip or a slight tilt of their head or something but it's automatic and kinda funny to see happen in real time.
The "one leg bent and the other leg straight" pose.
This is definitely hysterical but it isn't without purpose. I started paying attention to some of the things girls do when they take pictures and since I figured some of it out I both take better and appear better in pictures. For anyone interested I'll write what I know.
Some of the things I noticed for being photographed: Forcing out a laugh, even a fake one, makes your smile appear more genuine. The knee pops/squats/hands on hips indicate action of some sort, which makes the photo look a tiny bit less staged, so look like you could plausibly be doing or about to do something instead of waiting for a mugshot. Last, half of whether your smile looks genuine is because of what your eyes are doing, not your mouth, so smile with you eyes.
For taking photos: First, if you are somewhere dark, and using flash, grab someone who is not in the photo and have them shine a phone light down from above on your subjects. It softens the shadows from the flash. Second, if the main light is from behind your subjects, like the sun is behind them, get one of them to hold a phone light at their waist, a little in front. shining up on them. Suddenly you can see their faces AND the scenery.
Side note- Groups of girls (if you know them) love it when you pitch in to make their photo better, it's a really funny reaction. Like 8 girls just going "YAS F*CK YEAH I LOVE YOU" while also trying to cheese for the pic.
11. Back to the being cold thing...
Shower at near-boiling level temperatures.
My bf whenever I'm cold : "happens when women are too far from home"
Insinuating hell. He thinks he is hilarious. Every time.
10. Gotta get in there.
THE JEAN WIGGLE!
Jeans fit the waist but gotta do the wiggle to get them over the hips and booty
I do it to get it over my stomach fat.
I'm not "fat" (like at all) but god damn sometimes newly washed jeans need to stretch a bit before I feel like I'm in muffin top territory.
9. Who doesn't love a bargain?
Complimenting an item of clothing and then being immediately told how cheap it was and where it came from.
We're helping!
When someone says, "I like your dress," I want them to have a chance to get one too. So I say, "Thanks! It was only $20 at Target. And it has pockets!!" [pocket dance]
Or, if it came from a thrift shop, I tell them that. "Thanks! It was only $5 at a thrift shop. You know, the [shop] at [intersection] had a ton of cute dresses last time I went." I know they won't be able to get the same dress, but hopefully they can find something else good.
8. It was already like that.
Moving your things, forgetting they moved your things, then telling you they didn't move your things.
I bought us a second set of tweezers since she kept taking them to her car and leaving them in said car.
There are now currently two pairs of tweezers in her car. Cool.
Please find out how many tweezers your wife can squirrel away in her car, for the science.
7. Refused calories don't count.
Say no, they don't want any food/drink item that you offfered them, then proceed to eat half of yours.
Joey doesn't share food.
I have a good one:
Took a girl to the movies. At the concession stand I ask what she wants. She doesn't want anything. Are you sure? You can get anything you want. No, I don't want anything. Not even a drink, or something? No, I'm fine. So I grab a cherry coke and some buttered popcorn. In the car afterwards she's pissed at me because I drank my drink and ate my popcorn while she sat there and had nothing! And I was a jerk for getting buttered popcorn which she doesn't like.
6. Sorry ladies, it was you.
Try to pretend they didn't just fart.
farts
You: Whats was that?
5. You know you're gonna eat it anyway.
Ranting about a particular food being too salty or sweet or oily, but proceeds to eat it.
Ugh this thing is SO unhealthy. why do these even make this? it should be banned.
Proceeds to eat the entire plate.
My aunt to a tee.
She visited us from overseas a couple of weeks ago and we took her to several restaurants for dinner. Every single meal we had with her, the conversation would go like this -
Mum - The food here is great! I'm really in the mood for (insert dish here)
Aunt - disapproving sniff The menu looks nice, but you can never tell how much butter/oil/salt they're putting into your meal at restaurants. I'll just have a salad.
- Proceeds to eat half of the food off everyone else's plate *
After dinner -
Aunt - That was SO unhealthy. I'll have to fast for three days now, otherwise I'll get so fat!
4. Don't we all?
Making weird serial killer smiley faces when they are texting the person they love.
3. You're sexy, own it.
Buys NEW sexy swimsuit for summer (or motivation to get in shape for summer). Never actually wears the new swimsuit even though it looks totally fine.
2. Cuz it's cute, duh.
Its not weird, but when you mention that a girls clothing has pockets, she often puts her hands in them and does a little dance to show them off. Its cute.
My son's GF wore a prom dress...WITH POCKETS. She pranced around on glittery stiletto heels with hands in pockets, just to prove she could.
1. You know you care, admit it.
Tells their partner they can pick a place to eat then says no to every place they pick.
My wife and I do the 3-2-1 method. One of us picks 3 things, then the other narrows it down to 2, and then then the other makes the final choice. We use it pretty much every day for almost anything you can think of.
I just explained the 3-2-1 method to my wife, and I asked her if she wanted to watch John Wick, 300, or Inglorious Bastards. Her response was "F*ck that bullsh*t."
- People Explain Which Crazy Things Their Partner Did They Didn't Realize Were Weird Until Afterwards - George Takei ›
- People Explain The 'Attractive' Traits That Really Turn Them Off - George Takei ›
- People Break Down The Things That Men Refuse To Tell Women - George Takei ›
- People Break Down The Things That Women Keep From Men - George Takei ›
- Seemingly Normal Things People Did As A Kid That They Now Realize Were Really Weird - George Takei ›
A recently deleted Redditor wanted to compare notes on parents, so they asked:
"What screams 'I’m a terrible parent?'"
I can't tell anyone how to be a parent.
But I have a few ideas on how to make a few tweaks.
recording homer simpson GIF"I'm SUPER fascinated in finding out how this generation of kids who are growing up with cameras in their faces turn out. Seeing as generations tend to do the opposite of how their parents raised them, it’d be funny if the babies born now, completely revolt against all things social media 😅."
WildflowerChickpea
Just Say It!
"Not saying sorry to your kid when you are in the wrong or made a mistake."
SuvenPan
"I used to struggle with this. I became so used to excusing my existence that I became habitually defensive. Admitting that I’m wrong is still a conscious effort for me."
"For my children, I try to model being magnanimous when getting something wrong; if they correct me and they’re obviously right, whether it be with discipline or information, I try to go out of my way to say I was wrong and thank them for telling me. I think I’m doing better? Hard to tell."
darklightner11
Crap Talk
"Talking crap about your ex in front of your kid."
Material_Ambition_95
"There was this woman who would rant about her ex-husband in front of her kids all. the. time. and their faces would look so sad and hurt. You may hate that man but your kids have part of his DNA and they take everything you say to heart. It's a poisonous and manipulative thing to do."
Antidote_to_Chaos
"Adding to that, telling your kid about the 2 fraudulent lawsuits you’re creating against their other parent. And telling them how you’re going to hire a private investigator against the other parent. All while ignoring the child when they tell you 'Don’t talk to me about -other parent- you’re making me uncomfortable.'"
Fluffy-kitten28
That's Funny?
"Filming your child trying to mock them only because 'it's funny' when it's clearly uncomfortable for them, and then post the video on the internet."
arrastre
"I was an assistant manager at Spirit Halloween a couple of years ago and there was a couple there who filmed their clearly terrified young child screaming and crying at the animatronics, and they laughed. It hurt my heart."
carlykerfuffle
"Those videos of kids happily sitting down to blow out birthday candles, and then a pr*ck slams their face in the cake. WTF."
jpr_jpr
Bye Bye Bye
Sport Soccer GIF by Real MadridGiphy"If their kids are older, and want nothing to do with them."
spicy-bae
"Mom screams at me to move out and never talk to her again if she is such a bad mother. I move out and never talk to her again. Surprised Pikachu face."
No_Scale7584
No communication between adult kids and parents, speaks volumes.
Listen Again
No Way Wtf GIF by HarlemGiphy"Defending every action/behavior of your kid without hearing the other party's side. It's obviously natural and important to listen to your child, but you should not be disregarding the fact that your kid can make mistakes and is not perfect."
LeonLunaLola
"Or, for that matter, believing every story you hear about your child, no matter how outlandish it may be."
notthesedays
It's YOU
"When you use your kids as emotional support figures or use them to cover your own irresponsibility. You had a 20-year head-start on your kid, yet they're already more responsible and mature."
Osteo-Malaka-cia
"I just got the image of my dad in my head while reading this. No wonder why I don't pick up that f**ker's phone call. It's unbelievable how someone over 50 y/o can have the financial responsibility of an 8-year-old in a candy shop."
Zahard_Zj
Rude
"Trying to gossip with one of your children about the other one."
LennaPine
"My mother did this with all of her children - me, my sister, and our two older half-brothers from my mom's prior marriages. Before I cut contact with her, she'd call me and would bash my sister for 15-20 minutes."
"Or she'd talk sh*t about one of my older brothers and their wives/children. My sister would mention to me how our mom talked sh*t about me while on a call, etc."
"It's because of that; none of us siblings really communicate with or trust each other. We either fully cut contact with our mom or severely minimized contact."
shaoting
Are You Serious?
"An idiotic name (circa AITA Krxtxl) or anything similar. Any parent I’ve ever seen who does this crap treats their kid like an accessory. iPad/phone parents. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against screen time but there has to be some boundary) I had a child in my last preschool class who literally ONLY spoke in YouTube quotes or video intro styles."
"I had to have him at age 4 permanently removed from my class for hockey fighting a kid and screaming 'It’s a prank f***er.' So yeah... there’s been a lot of varying degrees of screen obsession but that was one of the worst. That and the kid who hit my co-teacher in the face with a poop-filled hand for putting the iPads away for lunchtime."
Sea-Butterscotch383
No Excuses
No Way Smh GIF by Amazon Prime VideoGiphy"Parents not punishing their kids. All kids are different and some things might not work but if your child is actively disrespecting a teacher or physically hurting another person and your first thing is to make an excuse."
nope123ee
Parenting ain't easy.
No one said it was gonna be.
And sounds like some of us may need to rethink doing it.
Redditor MightGuy420x wanted to share thoughts about some of the movies that left our brains and souls puzzled, so they asked:
"What movie had you saying 'What the f**k' the most while watching?"
Movies leave me aghast more often than not.
And endings are never easy.
Last Lines
"Swiss Army Man."
JawlessRegent64
"Isn't 'What the f**k?' also the last spoken line in the film?"
frygod
daniel radcliffe GIF by A24Giphy"Yeah lol, literally. It made me laugh so hard because I'd been saying that for the entire two hours I was sitting on my couch watching it. Never saw that coming from Harry Potter, Daniel Radcliffe is a strange man lol."
JawlessRegent64
A Midnight Opening
"The most audible 'What the f**k?' I have ever heard from an entire movie theater audience was actually from Pixar."
"It was their short film Bao, I think before Incredibles 2. A woman makes a little baby out of dumpling ingredients, there is a cute montage of them together, and then she eats it without warning."
"It was a midnight opening so the audience was all adults, and yeah nobody saw that coming."
AllBadAnswers
Weird but Funny
"Sorry to Bother You."
MCPanda6969
"I saw this in theaters having absolutely no idea where it was heading (like everyone I think). I must’ve walked out to pee at exactly the wrong time, when I came back I had to double-check it was still the right theater."
drownednotgod
"I freaking love this movie and you're exactly right. There was a point I went from like 'This is a weird one, but it's funny' to 'What in the actual f**k is happening?'"
"What's even better is if you go back and watch, they led you right up until that point. They're always hinting at it, but the protagonist makes everything about him and I think that's why it just hits you out of nowhere."
JackJackensworth
Gross
"Splice."
AnotherBadPlayer
"I feel bad for introducing this movie incorrectly to some friends. I really thought it was going to be some kind of science-fiction drama. And then Adrian Brody mated with it."
ddh85
"Well, that's easy the thing he was f**king was a human-animal hybrid that he raised from birth like a daughter and was made from his girlfriend's DNA the hybrid later changes from female to male and attacks the before-mentioned girlfriend which I guess is technically its own mother."
o_MrBombastic_o
30% Out!!
"Mother!"
GreatTragedy
"We had to refund AT LEAST 30% of the admissions for this movie every day when I worked in a theater. People were leaving the cinema pissed off because of this movie."
RepresentativeName18
jennifer lawrence mother movie GIF by mother!GiphyThat movie makes no sense at all.
Someone explain it to me!
No Light
"Human centipede."
Odd_Adhesiveness4804
"When Roger Ebert reviewed this movie, he gave it zero stars, saying such a movie could exist only in a universe with no light in it whatsoever, and hence there could be no stars in his review of it."
PhuckingDuped
Over It Rose GIF by HULUGiphyJan's Story
"Abducted in Plain Sight."
sodangshedonger
"My mom actually went to school with Jan and her mom was friends with my grandma. I’ve tried to get my mom to watch the show but she has refused because 'I have already had more than enough Jan Broberg in my life.'"
"From what my mom said, I’d take everything the family claims happened (especially Jan’s story about what happened while she was kidnapped) with a grain of salt because Jan was apparently super melodramatic even before the abduction."
"That said, I found the show to be less shocking than most people because their naïveté is incredibly unsurprising for a Mormon family in a small town in the 70s."
ToBeReadOutLoud
Unconvential
"The Lobster."
awakami
"Seriously had no idea what I was getting into. A couple and a dude bailed out of the theater when I saw it."
2ndRook
"The Lobster made me realize I had an unconventional taste for films. It’s my favorite film of all time next to Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I tried to make my friends watch it, and they all would bail out mid-film."
areyousureyourealive
"This. What utter f**king bats*it crazy horseshit this movie was."
Tackit286
Hey John...
"'Being John Malkovich' is just one weird thing happening after the other, giving you very little time to process it."
LoopyPro
"I got to see an advanced screening of Being John Malkovich. I knew absolutely nothing about it going in. It was the first time I was ever left so completely speechless by a movie in such a good way."
"I was already in love with the movie before the portal was even introduced. It could have just been a really weird series of set pieces revolving around those bizarre characters interacting in that weird half-floor and puppetry recitals and I would have been happy. Then it gets all metaphysical and kooky... And it did it all so perfectly."
lingh0e
Unreal
"Cats. I was just constantly saying 'What the f**k?' under my breath as I watched it in theaters. I honestly don't remember much of it. It was so incoherent in tone and execution, and weird that it just feels like a fever dream in my memory."
daddydonetomuch
Taylor Swift Dancing GIF by Cats MovieGiphySo many movie WTFs for me are about... "How did THIS find funding?!"
Thank God for vodka.