Everybody appreciates a little playful, amorous attention now and again, it does the ego good. What is not appreciated is overly aggressive, foul mouth hollering that can be heard for blocks. And the coin flips both ways. But more often than not, men are the catcalling culprits. So it's always interesting to hear about what happens when shoes swap feet as they say.
Redditor u/MaxwellWillamette wanted hear about the times the shoe was on the other foot by asking.... Men who've been catcalled before, what was it like and how did you feel about it?
even stevens point GIF
Hard No
Back in high school I made the mistake of sitting deeper into the cafeteria (that's where all the scummy people sat) and I sat opposite a girl completely at random. She gets my attention and says "hey would you want to go out with me"?
Her friend has this smile on her face that tells me what I already know which is they're teasing me. So I ignore her and continue having my lunch.
She taps me again and says well, do you? Still both of them with this smile like they're waiting for their gotcha moment. I look at her dead faced and simply say, no. Then I walk to the front of the cafeteria where the relatively normal people are.
A Hard Stare
At all points in my life and all contexts, this.
Once a car full of girls pulled up tires screeching in front of me and they all started calling me handsome. I just did the whole "stare at them as if you are a psychopath" thing and kept walking because I was 100% expecting them to make fun of me, or that I was being recorded as part of those reaction stunts.
To this day I wonder if they were really hitting on me or if it was a prank. I mostly think it was a prank, otherwise it would have happened again.
Are you Sure?
joke drums GIF by neomagazinroyale
Giphy
It's not great because the first time it happened they were joking to see if I'd respond, and every subsequent time it's happened my mind immediately thinks they're still joking.
Ren Folk
It happened at a Renaissance festival. It was a little embarrassing and awkward. I didn't take it personally, though. I figured they were just trying to sell me something.
Naw man, that was probably legit. Ren Faire folk are horny.
They're basically all drama/band nerds, spending an entire weekend at an event where nearly everybody is getting sauced after (and during) hours and your tent (or someone else's) is always a short walk away.
I'd rather not...
I was about sixteen and pumping gas into my car when someone driving past catcalled me. I felt kinda flattered at first but then decided they were probably making fun of me and wished it hadn't happened.
Weird yet Playful
From women? It felt like their game was off. Like either they were unsure how to proceed and felt awkward about it or just lacking practice.
Gay guys were much more fun and playful. Basically what I would aspire to be when flirting with women. How ironic.
Creepers
matt anderson creep GIF
Giphy
Only by friends, for fun. I've had girls creep on me, while out walking and ask me if I wanted to go to a party. I always thought that's how I'll wake up in a bathtub with no kidneys.
Good Ole Gays
I've been hit on by guys and girls and I gotta say, the girls were way creepier and when i told them I was uncomfortable I was suddenly the sexist pig for not wanting anything to do with them. The guys were surprisingly way sweeter but maybe gay guys are just nicer than straight guys idk.
Similar Feels
Jack Nicholson Thank You GIF
Giphy
It's embarrassing at the same time as being a bit of an ego boost. Awkward when you're not good at getting compliments.
Meat marketing
I (male 26) used to work in an office with 19 coworkers - all female. They were all much older except for one. Anyways, I've been caressed, hugged, touched, kissed on the cheek, etc. more times than I could ever recall. For a 21-year-old recent college grad, I loved the attention. Looking back, there were a few instances that were grounds for HR. But the women there treated me very well (aside from the flirting), and I liked every last one of 'em. I'm also 6'4" and in pretty good shape, so I never felt threatened. So yeah, I liked it haha.
Brazen
A guy said my shirt was funny then asked for me to turn around. I thought he was reading the back until I heard "mmmm".
To be honest, I felt a little creeped out. Later, I couldn't believe someone would be so brazenly open about checking me out, and that part made me feel a little better about myself haha.
Buzzcut
I had just gone to the barbershop a few days prior and gotten lined up and felt pretty good and fresh. I walked through the library in college wearing a well-fitting sweater with my 5/10 forearms showing and a girl whistled at me as I walked by and when I looked back she was giggling with her friends like children while looking me up and down.
It felt nice. Kind of weird, but nice nonetheless.
-[DELETED]
This fine thing
I'm a guy but I have long hair and a feminine figure (slim, with a large butt). From the front I have a beard so you can immediately tell I'm a man, but I've had guys check me out when they've only seen me from the back, and usually I find it funny, because it's never the nice kind of guy that you HEAR checking you out. So when I turn around they find out they were checking out another man's butt and as soon as they do they get REAL quiet and awkward. I like to joke that every time I trick a man into checking me out (especially the "look at THIS fine thing" kind of guy) I take their soul.
Smooth
Not really cat calling but an attractive girl walked past me and said "nice shorts" and smiled.
My dumb self said "no not really they're from Walmart"
I always wonder how differently I could have handled that situation
Any time anyone says anything about my clothes, I tell them where I got it and how much I paid. It's like a compulsion, it just falls out. "Oh, thanks, I bought it last summer at the Kohls; it was on the clearance rack for 12 bucks." Like, a simple 'thank you' is totally sufficient, but I just can't seem to stop there.
Must be joking
8 points·16 days ago
It's definitely different for men. There is simply no everyday expectation that anyone will compliment you on anything ever. Nothing. Not a chance. For a man to get catcalled is just such a weird experience that the first response is simply confusion.
Who are they talking to? Compliments aren't funny, so they can't be joking, but it appears they are in fact talking to me, so they must be joking. It's a complete dichotomy.
The next step is ambivalence. We don't know how to feel. If they are joking, then we should be offended, but if they aren't joking, then it's the happiest we've ever been. Both are possible, as they can't possibly be joking, and they have to be.
The final stage comes once we have decided whether or not they were having a go at us or not and resolve the dichotomy, even if it's just in our heads as we will likely never know their true intent.
Outwardly uncomfortable
Growing up in rural Tennessee in Christian churches, I had a lot of older women trying to set me up with their daughters, who often I'd never even heard of. It also made me pretty uncomfortable, especially with the way they talked about me. At least with the guys it was over quickly, but women(specifically older women) would badger me despite how outwardly uncomfortable I am.
Relativity
It's happened exactly 2 times in my 37 years, and I liked it. I imagine if it happened 2 times every day for 37 years it might get a bit old.
-[deleted]
Scammed
Understand that I'm not an especially attractive guy. I had a young woman call me out for being attractive at the Union Square farmer's market in NYC. I was more confused than anything. Turned out she was trying to compliment me into applying to work at an Abercrombie and Fitch store. Very weird experience.
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I have a constant fear of death. I wanna perfect the ending of "Death Becomes Her" so I can live forever.
Before
morbid death GIFGiphy"I'm not scared of death because of working in health care I was around it so much. I AM scared of what leads to death, however."
Full-Mulberry5020
Why now?
"Why should I be scared now of something that's only going to happen at the end of my life?"
User Deleted
"I did this cult thing called the landmark forum and I actually did like their “meaning of life”: the meaning of life is that there is no meaning. Life is empty and meaningless. There is no answer."
"Life is what you make of it and every persons answer is equally valid because there is no meaning to life. Life exists as, basically, an accident, we are all here by complete accident, there’s no great mystery, it’s all biology and you are 100% free to make life about whatever it is you want."
Conservative_HalfWit
Death and I are good friends...
"I was very sick as a child. Spent ages 7-20 in and out of hospital due to kidney issues. Lost a kidney at 28. Almost died during the surgery to removed the dead kidney due to blood loss. Had 5 surgeries back to back during the next 2 years. Twice they had difficulties bringing me out of anesthesia."
"Found my favorite aunt dead in her bed when I was 22. Watched my best friend die from a brain tumor at 30. Death has been a constant force in my life. Sometimes just on the edges waiting, sometimes unexpected staring me in the face. I'm not afraid because it's always been there. I now work in healthcare. Death and I are good friends."
Tiny_Teach_5466
No Worries
"Because it's coming for us all, sooner or later. So there's no point in worrying about it. I am much more concerned about day to day minutiae. The Lars von Trier film Melancholia starring Kirstin Dunst portrayed this perfectly. If there was an asteroid hurtling towards the earth, I'd probably be more preoccupied with worrying about whether I left the back light on or not."
Giallo_submarine
It's Over
The Lord Of The Rings Mueller Report GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"Because no one has ever made it out alive, and I was dead for an eternity before I was alive, and didn't suffer the slightest inconvenience because of it."
MarshallApplewhiteDo
I never thought about the before much. I hope the before is quick.
The Effects
Pray I Hope GIFGiphy"I hope that when my times comes it will be merciful. My uncle had a stroke, he is paralyzed. My grandmother is 91, but is losing all her memories of her life. Death does not scare me, what could be left of me before I die is what terrifies me."
M1ssy_M3
No Terror
"It’s like when the writer Nabokov said that he saw a picture one time, a picture of before he was born. It was a picture of his mother, his brother and sister that were older than him, but he had not been born yet. He said that when he saw that picture there was no terror in him, even though he was looking at a picture where he didn’t exist."
im_on-the_can
state of nonexistence...
"I'm not afraid of death, I'm afraid of dying. Death is just the state of nonexistence I experienced before I was born. I don't remember it because I didn't exist yet. Death will be the same way. I just don't want the transition to be marked by pain and sorrow at things left unfinished. I want it to be quick, painless, and with me surrounded by love."
Wazula42
I'm Gone...
"Because once I die, I won't know it. I won't miss people or regret things or feel pain or sadness about anything. I might fear being sick and slowly dying, just having to live with the knowledge that it's all going to end and this is the last time I'll ever see the people I love or taste good food or hear good music. That sounds almost unbearable. But death isn't even a thing, it's just having done something (died)."
"It's like virginity, it's a made-up state of being that just says whether or not you've experienced a specific occurrence. Once I die, I'm gone. My corpse will be the empty wrapper I used to be in, just garbage to be disposed of in whatever way makes my survivors feel better. I'll be switched off. If I don't worry about what the light feels after the bulb burns out, why would I be afraid of being dead?"
SallyHeap
At Peace
Season 3 Nbc GIF by The Good PlaceGiphy"I’m scared now because I have young kids. Once my kids are old enough to be on their own I imagine the fear will subside and I’ll have a more relaxed approach."
User Deleted
Some very interesting perspectives. May it all calm peacefully and with great mercy for us all.
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I once had a guy ask me if I was willing to follow him into the woods, depending on the price of the meal.
Yeah. No steak is worth that.
Plans After...
Wait What Wtf GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Thanks for the ride but I have a date with someone else, I figured you wouldn't drive me if you knew I was going on a date with someone else and I really needed a ride."
"Online dating, talked to her for a while, finally got the courage to ask her out and then she said that as we got there."
iareyours
Mirror Image
“'You look just like my wife!'”
catalinachild
"I did have a guy tell me I reminded him of his son. I don’t believe English has a word to adequately describe my feelings at that time."
UnicornMagicRainbow
"That would definitely do it."
chaotica78
Third Wheel
"'Hope you don't mind if my mother joins us.'"
ofsquire
"Actually had a girl do this on a first date because she had anxiety issues. Honestly wasn’t bad except that 90% of the time she was silent and her mom talked over her."
"I didn’t mind that much and wouldn’t have minded trying again when she was more comfortable except that she was let go at the company we worked at and she deleted her social media profiles and she never responded on her number. Ah well."
Seightx
Liar
Lying Simon Rex GIF by Simon Rex / Dirt NastyGiphy"'Hey bro aren't you gay? I made out with you last night.'"
"Random dude I've never seen before in front of my (f) date."
JHXC16
Was he lying though?
Filter Issues
"'You looked better on Tinder.'"
waqasnaseem07
"Isn’t it basic knowledge that everybody looks slightly worse than the worst picture you can find?"
no_user_ID_found
The Past
"'My ex used to do that too.'"
xxIvyOF
"Yep. I’ve definitely had two otherwise-decent-guy date-situations sour because the ex-comparisons just would not stop flowing. No woman wants to be seen as interchangeable—I’m not here to perfectly fill that ex-sized hole in your life. Focusing on the present moment and a future we could build together is a courtesy we need to grant each other in earliest dates of dating."
LarkScarlett
Powerless
"'I'm an alpha, you cant handle my top energy.'"
Midnightgay28
"I actually left a dude in the middle of dinner, in part, for saying this. I ordered an Uber under the table while pretending to listen to him. Went to the bathroom, and never came back. That was when I was young. Now I’d just say, 'How about we enjoy this meal in silence, before we head our separate ways.'”
UnicornMagicRainbow
Mommy...
"'Mother says I should be back by 9.'"
"Saying 'mother says' just feels weird."
bunnyrut
"That gives me Norman Bates vibes."
Werewolf_lover20
"'Mother says alligators are aggressive because they have an overabundance of teeth, but lack a toothbrush.'"
sodaextraiceplease
Obvs...
just kidding jk GIFGiphy"'If you were going to be murdered, what method would you prefer. Purely hypothetical. Obvs.'"
Specific_Tap7296
If it looks anything like a Dateline NBC episode... RUN!
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Or so you would think.
Do people still knit to pass the time? Are people actively collecting stamps?
It depends on who's asking.
Curious to hear about hobby trends, Redditor gizehgizeh asked:
"What are once popular hobbies that are slowly dying these days?"
Before we've become conditioned to living on our phones, these activities used to keep people occupied.
Before Texting, There Was This
"Letter writing."
– littlekingMT
Literal And Tangible Joy
"Well the internet killed pen pals for sure. I do remember I had a Japanese girl for a penpal maybe back in 2007 or so. I honestly don't remember how it started, pretty sure some website, but that was a fun experience. But now I can just straight up talk to foreign people real time, lol. But yea getting a physical letter that someone took the time to write and mail still is hard to beat feelings wise."
– skyburnsred
Model Trains
"When I was growing up, every town had a model train store in it. Now I have one in region and everything else has to be bought online."
– Hairy_Effective1172
Pretty Rocks
"Don’t see anyone playing marbles anymore, I had an awesome collection in school."
– sheeple85
"I had some marbles as a kid in the 90s. My grandma got them for me and I had no idea what I was supposed to do with them. I always imagined them as a thing kids in the 40s played with."
– Ryoukugan
People Were Moving Canvases
"Paintball has been dying a slow death since 2006. Sad, really."
– hobo_recycler
Before the general population began hating clutter, collecting was once a "thing."
Precious Coins
"Coin collecting... I'm a silver/gold nut and I'm always hunting for precious metal coins. whenever I go into a shop they get all excited because 'no one under 70 collects coins anymore.'"
– ThatFishySmell99
Post It
"Stamp collecting."
– spooky_scully_mulder
"Collecting in general, really. Of course there are still prominent collectors but it's slipped more into enthusiast and niche territory than being a popular hobby that you might expect anyone to have."
– iuytrefdgh436yujhe2
What A Gem
"Rockhounding was immensely popular back in the 1950's and 1960's. Personally, I think it's a fascinating and fulfilling hobby, but when I go to a meeting at a rock and gem club, I'm usually the youngest one in the room by several decades."
– filthy_lucre
People once enjoyed making things.
Admiring The View
"Stained glass. I learned how to make it from my old man, and my junior high art class teacher also taught it. Very few artisans are still around."
– brobeanzhitler
Metal Vocation
"Black smithing."
– kenworth117
"I bought a forge to try. It’s insanely hard work, and crazy expensive. I still haven’t finished a piece."
– DSentvalue
Scrapbooking
"Yeah. I'm watching the arts and crafts stores around me completely uninstalling their racks for specialty paper. Now the only thing they have is mega packs of repeating colors/images. To boot all the inclusions like papercraft/die-cut things, washi tape, scissors, stickers, etc have gotten so expensive I would rather go buy $5 bags at value village to get an assortment of things versus buying anything new. I really, really miss yard sales for the same reasons."
– Phantasmai
I envy people who have jobs that are basically their hobbies.
Not everyone gets paid doing what they actually enjoy and have a profound level of passion for.
If they do, kudos to them.
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