People Break Down The Groups In Society That Aren't A Cult But Totally Act Like One
Between the Lularich sensation and the stories coming from film and entertainment employees about their dangerous and sometimes deadly working conditions, there's been a lot of chatter about "not-technically-a-cult-but-totally-a-cult" situations.
Reddit user "swiggityswoogey" asked:
What is a cult, but doesn't feel like a cult?
The responses are ... telling. Take a look, and then take some time to really think about what you read. Has this stuff impacted you?
Maybe someone you love?
Let's get into it.
The Drama
stage fright dance GIF by The Head And The HeartGiphy"Drama club. The actors are one cult and the tech kids are a whole different, weirder cult that literally operates in the shadows." - dieinafirenazi
"The tech guys are the secret society that really runs the theater. The actors are just props with legs, and even the leads are just props with legs and lines." - bigmcstrongmuscle
"I did visual arts in university and our program shared the fine arts building with the theatre and theatre tech program. Yes. They're cult-like. And they're weird and annoying about it." - catby
"I never did tech in school, but got pulled into tech by my sister, who worked in community theater. When you are up at 3 a.m. breaking down a set after the play is done, you feel the culty." - Joninokc007
The Fandom
fans GIF by Billboard Music AwardsGiphy"Fandoms when they reach a certain level."
"I know of someone that YEARS later was still receiving harassment because they made the blasphemous mistake of disagreeing with a certain Supernatural shipping-pairing."
"We're talking criminal harassment leading to lost jobs, swatting, the works."
"And that's just an example, there are so many other fandoms that are as bad or worse. I mean cast and crew have been harassed, sometimes completely out of their homes, by obsessed fans in the past." - amalgamas
"I know Jared Padalecki's wife (who he met on the show when she played Ruby) had to stop coming to conventions because fans were literally horrible to her, like death-threat level." - orangestar17
"I was into the Marvel Cinematic Universe fandom for three years and it is 100% a cult."
"They don't even celebrate the source material anymore - it's more like a nonstop celebration of weird headcanons involving straight characters they reinterpret as gay. The people in these groups even refer to each other as family, myself included at one time."
"I eventually started ignoring the fandom and just watched the movies and the shows with my actual family. It's been one of the best decisions I've ever made regarding entertainment." - DastenHero
We're Not Family
Season 2 Cheers GIF by Pose FXGiphy"Some workplaces. The ones that push the "we're all family here" attitude especially." - mikenyle
"Workplaces that push the 'we're family' attitude are doing it solely to create a sense of obligation to the company while stifling the idea of being fairly compensated, because you're just supposed to help out family without asking for anything in return."
"Nevermind that they'll drop you like a sack of bricks if it suits them, because they know the 'we're family' thing is just a ruse to get you to sacrifice yourself for them, for basically nothing." - remotetissuepaper
"Companies that are really like families never need to tell you, because it shows in how well you're treated."
"Kind of like with actual families, if they keep invoking 'family' they're probably abusing you." - Big-Goose3408
Cults Don't Feel Like Cults
Sarcastic Twitch GIF by Hyper RPGGiphy"Honestly, cults don't feel like cults to those in them. Everything is set up to make it all feel normal. It works particularly well because cults prey upon those who are lonely and searching for a sense of belonging."
"Usually there's some religious aspect and some nebulous threat to fight against. It's designed to make people involved feel safe, like they're doing good, and like they'd be nothing without the cult."
"The cult at Jonestown, People's Temple, started as a church that was trying to help people of color in Indiana. It was primarily elderly people at the start of it all."
"People who were alone, people who wanted to do good. So they gave everything they had for the cause. As it grew, more varied people came into the picture, but it started as a church trying to help people - but with a predatory leader." - mycatwinky
Jeepers Creepers
dance party jeep GIFGiphy"Jeepers. They're the Furries of the automotive world." - biggest____chungus
"Omg. This... The "Silly boys jeeps are for girls" stickers make me gag." - contactlenz
"This. My mom was finally able to get the jeep she's been wanting for 20 years and she got initiated one day."
"Some of it is pretty cute actually, someone put a rubber duck in the jeep and there's this whole jeep wave thing."
"But yeah, it's culty. There's an entire culture around this type of vehicle and soon they're doing an event where a giant rubber duck will be passed off to drivers and travel around the country." - Gamer-Logic
"I own a JKU and absolutely love it - It's very complimentary to my lifestyle."
"But HOLY SH*T I can't stand the majority of the Jeep community. I'm a member of the area's Facebook page and everyone is either holier than thou Jeep purist or posting about their new order of rubber ducks from Amazon."
"I really liked the Jeep because we had one when I was little and now I'm associated with these idiots." - lankyd*ck
"As a Jeep owner, I 100% agree."
"I use mine to go on nice country drives with my wife, and as a way to enjoy the countryside. Fellow Jeep owners act like I'm committing some sacrilege because I don't want to tear around in some muddy field, or try to drive up a rock." - EarhornJones
"I came here to say this. I have been a Jeep guy my whole life."
"First car I drove was my parent's Jeep Cherokee when I was 8 or 9ish. I have owned one pretty much my entire adult life BUT I'm not part of the Jeep culture everyone hates."
"First, I have a Cherokee (93 so still a "real" offroad capable Jeep but since it's not a Wrangler people don't care about it.)"
"Second, I don't have anything flashy on my Jeep and it's more of a sh*tbox than everyone in the new Wranglers, but I drive it and use it like a Jeep."
"Third, I can't stand the whole 'Its a Jeep, you gotta wave' crap or the 'ducking' Jeeps thing everyone does. My local Jeep groups on Facebook only seem to care about ducks and waves and light bars."
"That said, and like someone else already said, there are two different types of Jeep people."
"There's the mall crawler, light bars before lockers, parking on a curb because it's a Jeep, check out my angry eye grill Jeeps..."
"...and there's the rest of us that don't care how she looks as long as it will get down a trail or through the rocks like we want." - struhall
Moms Losing Money
melissa mccarthy the boss movie GIFGiphy"I got tricked into going to an MLM meeting by a friend. Was supposed to be like a 'girls seminar.' I had actually just left a religious cult (ICOC) and it had the exact same vibe, except based around Amway."
"Closed but seemingly open & friendly, but aggressive, social circle. Motivational sounding, use of tons of buzzwords, hiding information, put in a lot of money for little gain."
"I had no idea how deep MLMs went to keep you locked in." - savwatson13
"Oh they absolutely feel like a cult, if you aren't buying into it."
"One of my best friends in high school grew up indoctrinated into Amway. I went with his family once to one of their big 'business meetings' or wtf exactly they call them just to hang out and get out of town."
"I already didn't buy into, and the 'meeting' is still one of the most bizarre experiences of my life."
"This huge auditorium with a stage had a couple hundred people seated. Popular (at the time) but completely irrelevant music was being blasted on speakers like I was at a damn concert, you had to yell over it."
"After a bunch of group singalongs, the leaders humble bragged about how good they have done recently and whatever fancy car one of them had bought with cash (ooooh /s) and how by following these 3 or 4 incredibly broad and vague steps, you too could be one the 5 people on stage instead of sitting in that crowd of hundreds."
"It felt like a reskinned Sunday service ramped up well beyond 11 and about as genuine as your average congressman." - WitchOfTheSword
"Watching the Amazon series on LuluRoe made me realize humans just really REALLY like being a part of a tribe, don't we?"
"It's engrained into our animal brains still. Herd animals through and through. Every convention looked just like a church, a comic con, a concert etc. We want to look up to someone and be someone to look up too."
"It's always good to be a part of something and a community, it makes us feel safe, but I guess the line is drawn when you start surrounding yourself with just that ONE tribe." - Davis1511
HR Recruiters Break Down The Biggest Resume Red Flags | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
You really want to land that dream job? Then attention to detail on your resume and cover letter are a must. Don't waste that first impression, like accident...Just Ride
30 Rock Fellow Kids GIF by PeacockTVGiphy"My wife really wanted a Peleton and Covid plus no gym memberships led us down that road."
"The workouts are good but holy f*ck, 90% of the instructors absolutely feel like they are trying to get you to join a cult or MLM scheme or something, they just have that vibe. They just ooze insincerity, as if everything they say is scripted and written by some corporate algorithm to appeal to millenials."
"Or they throw in some weird dumb sh*t that feels like they skimmed through a buzzfeed article and tried to talk about it during the workout and you end up spending three minutes listening to some weird recap of the article in the middle of your workout."
"They always come off as a "Hello, fellow kids/millenials" moment."
"There was one instructor talking about how they were "such an 80's/90's kid" and goes on about "Does anyone else remember that movie with David Bowie with the pants and it was all weird? That was my FAVORITE movie. I have no idea what it's called but I watch it all the time it's my favorite ever."
"This is an actual example. They were talking about the Labyrinth, but apparently couldn't remember the title or literally anything about the movie, but it was 'their favorite movie ever' and they still managed to talk for a few minutes about it for no reason." - attrm
Yesterday's Weather
Deserve Black Woman GIF by Janet JacksonGiphy"True crime enthusiasts, especially the ones who pay to go to live tapings of 2 people talking about their daily lives, and then casually talking about victims innocently murdered like it was talking about yesterday's weather."
"I used to be addicted to true crime stuff, but slowly have moved on." - Catlover2727
"I love true crime a lot and find it really interesting! I'm even majoring in Criminology! HOWEVER My aunt was murdered, pretty famously, by a serial killer."
"There's pods casts and videos about her, and let me tell you... as someone who's FAMILY are the ones being talked about, some of these people are downright disrespectful. It's important to remember that these victims were people, with families that loved them.""
"There's a couple of podcasts and true crime channels that are actually really good and respectful, but not as many as there should be." - uwuursowarm
Elon
Come On Wtf GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Tesla - how am I the first to add this?"
"Wait, maybe I've got this backwards though because they certainly do act cultish…" - Rockitrulz
"What do you mean, it's not a cult!"
"Elon Musk is going to revolutionize the world. Just ignore the lies, the government subsidies, his entrepreneurial history, and literally everything he says and does and things kind of look like they might be going okay!" - SeedersPhD
"These people literally want their currency to depend on what King Elon tweets." - the_leprechauns_anus
Employees Have Lives
falcon heavy rocket GIF by Product HuntGiphy"I turned down a job at Spacex making more money because every employee (6+) at Spacex I talked to told me they suggest working literally anywhere else and regret working there because of Elon musks insane mandatory work ethic."
"I work in software. 80 hours of work doesn't magically produce 80 hours of software. Everyone who isn't stupid as f*ck understands this. But yet that whole company pushes this mantra that you must work 80 hour weeks."
"Google does a cool 40 hours for most employees, and pretty much always did. My manager does "60" and much of it is availability for meetings with sitting on his @ss the rest of the time or gaming all day while he waits for his meetings."
"But somehow Spacex thinks that these billion dollar companies who treat their employees well and have a higher market cap are somehow dumb for letting people have lives" - MufugginChungus
"I interned there one summer and no joke, Elon sent a company-wide e-mail basically saying (in no uncertain terms) that 'if you're not working 80 hours a week, you're not working hard enough.'"
"All I needed to know that I never wanted a full-time position at that company." - Djent_Reznor1
Teaching
Canadian Comedy GIF by CBCGiphy"Public Education in the United States."
"Teachers are encouraged to work well beyond their contract hours for extremely limited pay, come in when they are sick even during a pandemic and then fed toxic positivity about how much better they are making kids lives." - Mudgeon
Two Party Trouble
You Lose Key And Peele GIFGiphy"To me the Democratic and Republican parties take on a lot of the same aspects."
"Those two storylines seem largely fictional to me; that one serves the interest of business, opposed to large government, and the other the common good, for all people, and social equality."
"Both focus on the interests of the same people, the very wealthy."
"Both set up a strong us-versus-them context, a sense of belonging for members, adding extra dislike for an opposing side to what is the minimum required to sustain a cult, the attachment part."
"Both emphasize some degree of accepting larger purpose and project, but it's a scam, the same scam ran by both."
"The wealthiest .1% might think that the Republicans really are "their guys," since they push transfer of wealth to the already wealthy a little further, but the country decaying under them isn't of benefit to them either, in the not-so-long run."
"Billionaires play games that they are also really losing." - john-bkk
Commission
happy episode 1 GIFGiphy"Commission based insurance sales."
"Took a job at American Income Life, worked for 2 weeks basically shadowing. Each Thursday they had this bragging session at the beginning of the day."
"The senior I was following didn't earn a penny, wasted gas, food money, kept telling me how he was 'taking control of your own schedule and don't have to learn new things like those techy guys' and how it's so great."
"Now I'm a 'techy guy' earning 3 times more than him." - overpaidengineer
Sports
Big Bang Theory Team GIFGiphy"Cults are loosely defined as a group of people that are dedicated to a singular set of beliefs, purpose, and/or goals, and commonly have a common interest in a particular person or object."
"To that end, essentially every major sporting team is a cult."
"A bunch of cultists (players) who are passionately following their cult leader (coach) in a singular goal (winning their sports championship)."
"In many of the lower levels, like High School and College sports, you'll still see individual personalities and lack of unity. The High School player who enjoys the game, but doesn't take it seriously. The College player who honestly doesn't care if his team wins or loses, and it just trying to impress scouts as an individual so that he can go pro."
"But by the point you reach the top level, it's basically full-cult mode."
"This sportsball game will take over the player's life and dominate basically everything they do. The cult becomes their identity so much so that they frequently lose individuality and become simply a part of the team." - Goal-Express
Disney
Happy Snow White GIF by DisneyGiphy"I had an older co-worker who I hated working with. She would NOT stop talking about the last Disney trip, the next planned Disney trip, her daughter's obsession with Disney, her own obsession with Disney, movies, musicals, etc."
"It didn't end. Her phone case and all of her jewelry were all some mickey mouse variation. I just don't understand."
"Absolutely nothing is wrong with liking Disney, feeling nostalgic about it, visiting the parks, etc. However, this woman ONLY talked about Disney related things."
"People need some variation." - censorkip
The Rock Shop
spencer pratt crystals GIFGiphy"Crystals for 'healing' absolutely."
"Few years ago I found myself in a bit of a tourist trap rock shop. Now, I love me a good rock, always have, I don't judge when people pick up a random stone and are like 'oh man, this looks cool' I get it."
"So I'm snooping around, giving the side eye to this 7' tall amethyst geode trying to figure out if my girlfriend would notice me packing it in the trunk when this woman turns to her husband and says:"
" 'Oh! I think I need a few more crystals for my back, it's been hurting something fierce lately and I don't think the ones I have are cutting it anymore.' "
"Sure enough, woman buys a glob of quartz about the size of a normal human brain and walks out the door talking about how her back feels better already."
"Amazing." - Drix22
Now that you've read through, what "cultish" stuff is happening in your life?
Adults Who Still Need A Stuffed Animal To Go To Sleep Share Their Experiences
Reddit user Old-Horse1185 asked: '34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental object. Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?'
Stuffies, plushies, stuffed animals, or plush toys; whatever you might call them, we likely all can remember a fluffy friend we had in our childhood.
But some adults might have carried their childhood friend into adulthood, or even made others along the way, and they might even still go to sleep with them at night, too.
Redditor Old-Horse1185 asked:
"34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental objects."
"Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?"
The Twin Bond
"My twin sister died when I was 18. Ten years later, I still sleep with her unicorn pillow pet, she gets a nice spot on the bed, and I'd never be with someone who made me feel bad about having it. Only my girlfriend is trusted enough to give pillow pet a bath."
- insomniacinsanity
"My twin brother died when we were seven, and I used to have a specific stuffie that was given to him by an American lady who worked in the hospital he was in, but it got damaged in a house move when I was a teenager and was unsalvageable."
"It was a limited-run stuffie that you could only get in a specific American store in the 90s, so it was basically irreplaceable. My husband, 10+ years later and without letting on, tracked one down and paid a silly amount of money to have it shipped to the UK and gave it to me for Christmas a couple of years ago."
"I sleep with it every d**n night. I'm mid-30s, and I'll never stop."
- beesandsids
Keeping Them Close
"My partner passed away a few weeks ago, and I now cuddle his shirts that still have his scent. When my son spends the night with his grandparents, I also cuddle w his blanket or the pillow he sleeps on."
- anonmomanonnin
Cuddles and Fidgets
"My grandma made me a pillow when I was born. She sewed the pillow together and the pillow case, which had kittens all over it."
"I’m 33 years now she passed when I was 31, and I sleep with the same pillow in my arms every night."
"The pillow case is worn to bits because I guess I use it as a fidget thing I rub in between my fingers. Yes, I’m weird."
- Valuable_Panda_4228
From the Beyond
"I bought my wife a big stuffed seal for our first Valentine's Day. This seal has a slight green tint to it, so we named him Sealo Green. She had Sealo for a couple of years before she passed away."
"I hug Seal-o every night and pray to my wife, tell her about my day, things coming up, etc. I'll start using her perfume on Sealo soon, so I can smell her while I pray to her. My heart can't take it right now."
- Cubbycupcake-Uther
A Gift from Grandma
"I am one. My grandma gave all the grandkids a cat plush. A cat food brand had a promotion, if you bought enough cat food you'd get a free plushie. With 14 grandkids, a lot of food was bought to get there. Her cats didn't complain though, lol (laughing out loud)."
"I still sleep with it, it's a feeling of comfort, safety, and home."
- DavyJonesLocker2
An Evolving Friendship
"Stuffed dog I've had since my mom was squeezing him while giving birth to me. That dog has seen some s**t."
"He's a 'Sad Sam,' and his eyes used to break my heart when I was a kid, so I buried him under other stuffed animals or made him face the wall so I wouldn't have to look at him."
"Then I felt really guilty because I didn't want him to feel punished when all he wanted was to be loved. So I've been sleeping with him for almost 40 years now."
"I recently bought an original one off eBay to see the comparison and man, I have loved the daylights out of that dog!"
- dumdadumdumAHHH
A Special Bond
"I now sleep with my girlfriend's stuffed bunny she has had since birth. He’s my best friend now! I love you, Bootstin!!"
- silversauce
"Aww, that's awesome. My partner is the only person I've ever been with who didn't make me feel like crap for still having my blanket. When I travel, I leave it with them, and I think they probably cuddle up with it as much as I do after a rough day."
- the_Ozz
Keeping a Partner Close
"Sometimes when I take a nap and my wife doesn't, I'll take her pillow to sleep with because I like the smell."
"It smells like baby powder, vanilla, and her."
- TrailerParkPrepper
Very Considerate
"Huge jellycat bears. I don’t even wanna, but I’m just afraid I’ll hurt their feelings if I don’t."
- CommonAd9606
"As a kid, I routinely slept with a zillion stuffed animals on the bed because I didn’t want any of them to feel left out."
- PumaGranite
"As a kid? I'm 26 and still have to hug them all as I go to sleep or they'll feel left out!"
- Scymber
Lower Back Pain
"I sleep with a body pillow (plain cover). Doctor recommended it a few years ago to help with my lower back pain and it really does help."
- HappyTimeHollis
"I sleep with a body pillow but it's an alligator. My grandparents gave it to me when I was 11 years old. It has a huge open mouth you can put your arm through or use to prop your phone. Had it 24 years. Love it to death."
- smoretank
Full Body Support
"Squishmallows. I have sciatica and they're great for when I go to bed. I put one between my knees at night (side sleeper) and I snuggle up with one."
- Raging_Utahn
Happy Kitty, Sleepy Kitty
"I'm not one to sleep with plushies, but my cat likes to snuggle up to me and sleep with his fluffy little head on my shoulder."
- imaybeacatIRL
"Cats have to count. My previous cat actually slept as the little spoon, snuggled in my arms."
- disapprovingfox
The Long-Distance Relationship
"I am a guy, I recently got to sleep with a stuffed animal for a week, I won't go into the details as to why or how, just know that I lovvveeeed it. I would get called a weirdo if I confess to this to the world, so I have kept this to myself and my bestie only."
"The stuffed animal was a large teddy bear, since then it has been taken away and now it is placed in the living room, my bedroom has one small stuffed toy that I sleep with, it's not super large and not as comfortable as the teddy but it works."
"It makes me feel good and less alone, the closest person in the world to me is 700km away, what I'm about to say is weird but hugging the teddy and pretending it's her makes me calm and makes me want to sleep."
- uninformed-but-smart
Build a Friend... with IKEA
"Ikea Hippo, Ikea Elephant. The Ikea bigs are the superior sleep companion. I also have the shark, but he is not right for my shoulder when cuddling so he guards."
- pm-me-neckbeards
"I also keep my Ikea shark on guard at night! The Ikea octopus is the guard when I sleep at my boyfriend’s house."
- jeff-buckleys-teeth
A Comfort Become Real
"When I was a toddler, I got a stuffed animal as a present from my uncle. It was a light brown rabbit with button eyes and ears with rainbow stripes on the inside. I'm unsure of when I got it, but I was either one to two years old or four years old."
"I don't know how or why, but it had a distinct scent, not particularly noticeable unless you shoved your face in its fur, like I did, haha. As I grew up, I needed to have this rabbit with me or I would not be able to sleep. I remember this one time when I couldn't find it in time for bed, and I was so distressed trying to fall asleep that I started hallucinating."
"Over time she lost an eye, her ears became frayed, her fur fell out in patches, and she looks like a well-loved creature (because she is) or hot garbage, depending on who you ask."
" Even in my rebellious teen years, I couldn't pretend to dislike her because the scent and texture of her fur gave me a feeling of comfort and safety, even when it felt like everyone was against me."
"I live by myself now at age 34 and you better believe I still keep her in my bed. The scent is gone but sometimes I can trick my brain into thinking it's still there, and when I touch the texture of her fur, I will still get a wave of comfort and reassurance the same way I did as a child."
"It's amazing not only how humans will bond with anything, but also the effect these things will have on a person."
"This got sappy, my apologies."
"PS: Her name is Ninni."
- Mwuuh
"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'"
"I'm reminded of this quote from 'The Velveteen Rabbit.'"
- tinycole2971
While everyone might feel a little silly about their sleeping arrangements, most of those who still sleep with a cuddly friend have spent a great deal of their life with their companion already.
From sentimental reasons to physical needs, everyone needs comforted from time to time, and there's nothing quite like the unconditional love of a favorite stuffie friend.
Working remotely from home certainly has its advantages, including not having to endure traffic and deal with coworker drama.
But many people found that during the pandemic, the isolation of working from home left little to be desired.
People who have jobs requiring them to commute every day and arrive at the workplace are given the opportunity to be social and feel like they're a part of society.
But being a part of a work environment can come with its own unique occupational hazards.
Curious to hear from strangers in the workforce, Redditor AMGBOI69420 asked:
"What’s the most f'ked up thing you’ve seen at work?"
People in medical professions draw on their endless list of shocking events.
The Crazy Patient
"I was sorting all the psych patients that were hospitalized in my state, and got to this guy: a teenager or maybe a bit older, and he got sent to the ward because he suddenly got aggressive and started to have some episodes that he squirmed in pain/took off his clothes and things like that. Before being hospitalized he was complaining about these things, but nothing the medics did was working and nothing wrong was found, so it should be a psychiatric issue, no?"
"Wrong, he was put in the ward for 2 or so years and lost a lot of his life, being considered insane, because he developed a rare spinal cancer that was hard to detect and caused him extreme pain. Really f'ked up, I don't remember what happened to him afterward, but I not really optimistic that it had an happy ending."
– vtomal
The First Aid Officer Who Couldn't Unsee These
"I was a first aid officer in a corporate job."
"Elderly pedestrian hit by a car in our car park: compound tib fib fracture that tore through her calf muscle"
"Deep laceration with arterial bleeding after some idiot from another department tripped and dropped a metal first aid down a flight of stairs during a fire drill."
– W2ttsy
Patient Left Against Medical Advice
"Patient comes in to the ER, gets full sepsis workup. His chemistries are all f'ked up, he required a manual white cell count because his was so high the analyzer basically said 'WTF?!', his urine was full of white cells and bacteria. You know, your classic 'old person UTI that's gone septic.' We figure he's going to be admitted. Nope, they send him home. Mind you, this was not a case of 'patient left AMA (against medical advice),' this was just the doctor said 'Yeah, seems like you've got a UTI. Go home and drink some cranberry juice.'"
"Two days later, the same patient comes in, with the same complaint. Gets the same blood and urine tests. While I'm doing the manual white cell count, the phone rings. It's the reference lab down the street. The blood cultures on the patient I'm currently working on from two days prior have come up positive. I take the notification and call the ER to let them know. Us labbies figure he's going to be admitted for sure this time. Come to find out, they sent him home again. (Again, not an AMA, a 'Go home and drink some cranberry juice.')"
– coffeeblossom
Those in customer service share their shocking eye-witness accounts.
Trailblazer
"I worked at one of the busiest Walmarts in the country during Spring Break for 6 years... I wouldn't even know where to begin."
"I guess the drunk lady leaving the bathroom with her pants around her ankles while actively sh*tting as she walked across the front of the building and back outside into the wild."
"None of the workers wanted to deal with it so they parked a shopping cart over each turd until the cleaning crew came in."
– UncleGrako
Slimy Salespeople
"Worked at a Nissan dealership where most salespeople where slimy POS. One senior citizen with a veteran ballcap was working on a deal for a car for his grandkid. Nice old guy got tired and fell asleep in the chair waiting for the salesguy to work out the deal with the sales managers. One of the managers from the bullpen walks by and farts right in the sleeping old mans face then runs back to the bullpen where everyone was watching and laughing. It was disgusting, I told the sales guy who I knew was a Iraq vet. He went to the bull pen and screamed in the face of every single one of those f'kers. He screamed so much at them I thought he was gonna pass out."
– adrielago
Work environments can be extremely dangerous.
"Once saw someone step into a bucket of hot fryer oil, it got into their shoes and everything. Was so bad that when they took the shoe off it peeled of skin with it. The person had 2nd and I believe 3rd degree burns. He never came back but I saw the pictures and it was horrific."
– Mrlionscruff
"I worked at a printing manufacturer and saw something like this happen in person, the guy had his right arm shredded. The wrench in his other hand stopping the machine is the only reason he didn't go all the way through. Later that month a 2400lbs paper roll was dropped on a coworker in front of me. I'm glad to be out of that job."
– Beullersghost
Threatening The Employee
"I worked at a Goodwill for a few years, we had lots of drug addicts trying to shoot up in the changing room and had an occasional OD."
"But the most shocking thing I experienced was the amount of times people physically threatened or attacked me or my co-workers when we refused their donations. Getting in our faces and trying to push us around, one guy tried to hit someone with a car. Another one threw a picture frame that narrowly missed smashing my supervisor's head, another threw such a temper tantrum that he smashed an entire set of chairs and a kitchen table."
"There was also someone who called the police because we changed the prices on soft-cover books."
– carefulwithyrbananas
T.M.I.
"Saw one guy drop dead (office job)"
"One get an arm cut off (Pulp mill)"
"One get de-gloved (Paper mill)"
"But the winner was the day we walked into work at an auto parts store and found the assistant manager f'king another assistant manager. Just going at it."
– Bigdaddyjlove1
Mechanical Nightmare
"Box cutting job saw a guy die after losing his arm to the machine. I still to this day dont know how my room mate at the time kept going to work for another few weeks before quitting."
"We'd go to work stoned off our a**es everyday. And seeing that guy die was a nope for me. I knew it was far to easy for the same mistake to happen to me stoned. Wasn't gonna get sucked in and die for 15 bucks an hr."
"Any heavy machinery related jobs since Ive made sure to ask about work related accidents and how common they are along with when the last one happened."
– idontneedjug
When I was a parade performer at certain theme park, we performed on a day when it was reportedly record-breaking heat, and some of my fellow performers who were dancing atop a couple of the floats collapsed and passed out from heat stroke in view of guests.
It was the scariest thing to see several paramedics bursting onto the scene and taking these unconscious young performers being carried away in stretchers.
Since then, the park instituted a code-90 protocol where the choreography was modified whenever the temperature hit 90 degrees.
Be it desperation, self-indulgence, or simply optimism, many people never leave home without a condom.
If the chances of "getting lucky" are much more likely at some places than others, one never knows where or when they might hit it off with someone.
Including a funeral.
Bizarre and tasteless as that sounds, a recent study reportedly showed that 1 in 8 men under the age of 35 do, in fact, bring condoms with them when attending a funeral, "just in case".
Whether or not these condoms were used, however, is another story entirely.
"After a recent study found 1 in 8 men under 35 admit to taking condoms to funerals "just in case", what's your experience with this?"
Select Crowd...
"I went to my grandma's funeral and hit it off with this hot nurse."
"Things were going great until my brother pulled me aside and said it was my second cousin."
'You know who shows up at funerals for old people? "
"Family members."- bumblef**kglobal
"I remember seeing a really hot chick at my grandmother's funeral."
"Immediately thought was I should chat her up."
"Then my brain went to, 'What if she's family and we just never met?'"
"I just went back to mourning."- VideoGameDana
Okay then...
"Once I was dating a girl whose dad absolutely forbid us from dating."
"Like, would lock his daughter in her room and take her phone to make sure we did not communicate."
"She told me when we spoke for a moment at Starbucks that she would date me if her dad was out of the picture."
"He died is a car crash on the freeway, and since her mom liked me invited me to the funeral."
"My girl and I sat next to each other at the funeral and couldn't wait, got it on in the parking lot of the funeral home."
"Condom was necessary."- crunchysquare
car studio GIF by ZI ItalyGiphyNever The Funeral, Always The Wake
"Ngl, some of the best parties I’ve been to have been wakes."
"In no way disrespectful, they were a celebration of the person’s life and also a massive tension release after grimness of the funeral itself."
"So I’m not surprised some people take a condom just in case."
"I’ve never done it, but I didn’t often expect to get laid regardless of situation."- Goryokaku
Oops...
"Proudly in the 7 out of 8 camp."
"But the 1 in 8 aren’t wrong."
"Heard through the family grapevine that one of my female cousins met a dude at a funeral and they banged it out the same night."
"Also turns out they were related (what’re the odds at the funeral of a relative? )."
"Distant enough they would never see each other again (different branches of her family), close enough that their family photo albums have overlapping people."- ESQBOJaguar
If You Really Think About It...
"Biologically speaking mourning/death triggers mating instincts as though that death tells the lizard brain in us that we need to procreate because death is scary."
"Scum'ically speaking, funerals typically leave people especially women in a state of fragility that leaves them vulnerable to suggestion and coercion."
"Socially speaking, some people, both men and women, seek comfort and company after/during a mourning period and when two people engage in comforting each other emotionally through a death it can trigger chemicals in the brain that cause the idea of connection or chemistry which can inevitably lead to copulation."- KURO-K1SH1
Season 18 Episode 3 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphyBetter Safe Than Sorry!
"If you forget to bring a condom you increase the chance of casual sex with 10.000%."
"It’s a well-known fact."- Mukkeman
Not Just Men...
"I'm not a man and I've taken condoms 'just in case' pretty much anywhere."
"I've told folks to take condoms 'just in case' to a festival who I was sure would never have a one night stand and who I had never even seen mingle with any man/woman."
"It's a safety."
"The thing costs less than a dollar, but if anything somehow would happen, not having it could cost you your healthiness or independence/freedom due to a child being your new responsibility."
"Unless you absolutely, 100% am sure you will not be having sex that day, and no one will be able to change your mind - carry a condom."
"And having visited a funeral is likely not impactful enough to everyone to make them absolutely sure of that."-deterministic_lynx
It Is, Indeed, A Source Of Comfort...
"I'm a woman, but I'm going to point out that grief affects everyone differently."
"Some people get an intense need for sex when they are grieving, I speak from experience here."
"Perhaps they're carrying them everywhere already, but choosing to take some specifically to a funeral makes perfect sense to me."- Sexy-Snowflake
"My bf's son died, and his sex drive was significantly higher around that time period, I think it's just a way men deal with stress."- Arielxxxlee
"There is no 'wrong' way to grieve."- Noctudeit
Sexy Ava Gardner GIF by Turner Classic MoviesGiphyAlways Listen To Your Mother...
"When I turned 15 my mom told me to always have a condom in my wallet just in case."
"That was before people realized it was really bad to keep it in your wallet."
"So yeah I’ve been pretty much everywhere with one 'just in case'."- euphoria110
If It's Already There, Why Take It Out?
"I do too."
"I'm not going to remove the random condom that is in my wallet just because I'm going to a funeral."
"Not that I ever needed one, I'm still a virgin BTW."- azarbi
When One Life Ends, Another Begins...
"I’ve heard that the proximity of death increases the desire to make new life."
"Anecdotally, my FIL and MIL met at a funeral and 9 months later my husband was born."- KerouacsGirlfriend
Lionel Messi Hug GIF by FC BarcelonaGiphyNot SPECIFICALLY Funerals...
"We bring condoms everywhere, 'just in case', not only the funeral, you silly!"- WeetIkVeelNL
No one should be judged if they happen to have a condom with them when attending a funeral.
After all, should the moment arise, better to be prepared and safe.
On the other hand, if any of these people are attending the funeral with the intention of "getting lucky", that's just... yeah...
The Best Real-Life Examples Of 'Never Interrupt An Enemy While They're Making A Mistake'
People will trip themselves up eventually.
Because liars and lunatics always make mistakes.
They may be small mistakes, but they leave just enough room to expose their wicked ways.
Sure we all want to fight off an enemy and be the victor.
But sometimes the victor's greatest weapon is nothing but a little patience.
Then, we celebrate with a smile as we watch the crumble.
And maybe we have a little victory dance.
Redditor Spinksy48 wanted to understand the fun of letting your opponent lose by just doing nothing, so they asked:
"What is your 'never interrupt an enemy while they are making a mistake' moment?"
If the story starts to get really crazy, just wait for a break.
Then ask a question from the beginning.
I guarantee you know more of the lie than they do.
Just keep talking, friend.
Gotcha
Dashcam Hello GIF by TranscendGiphy"I let the lady who changed lanes into me run her mouth about how I rear-ended her before pulling the cop aside to show him my DashCam footage."
ThrowingChicken
A Cherry Wave
"I was accused by a neighbor of reversing out of my drive and hitting his car. He gave me the date and time I had allegedly done it and pointed to a (small) scrape on my car that supposedly matched perfectly the location of the dent on his. This was 7 weeks after the alleged event, by the way."
"I said it wasn't me but told him to contact his insurance and we'd see what they said. A few weeks later I get a letter from my insurance asking what had happened, to which I responded with the date I had bought my car (and updated my insurance) - two weeks after the supposed bump."
"He never spoke to me again but I used to give him a cheery wave every time I saw him glowering at his window."
Gazcobain
Speak Once
"In a meeting with my project manager who has not been in the office or worked a proper full day for MONTHS, she has increasingly been annoyed by people bypassing her to get things done by telling me and her other direct reports what to do."
"I was about to answer a question for stakeholders, and she told me to let her speak one sentence and will let me have my bit. I did as I was told, and she told the stakeholder a completely wrong thing about the system we were handling and made a complete fool out of herself. She got sacked this month."
choiaera
We Hated Each Other
"Guy stole a presentation from me, this is 25 years ago. We hated each other. When he started presenting I realized I had made a huge error, didn’t say anything. Let him get through it. Asked him about the error, but he couldn’t answer. This was in front of COO. Got fired, not for just that, he was an overall douche. This was before everyone was on PCs, and had one printer in one room."
Bmilvis
Whoops
Office Space GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy"When a coworker who I hated got fired a few weeks after I decided to stop fixing his mistakes even if it impacted a client."
Hrekires
It's always thrilling to see the bad colleagues go!
Bye. Bye. Bye.
I will see you on the 15th
Idiot Reaction GIFGiphy"Not my story, but several years ago my older brother was fighting for custody of his son with his ex-wife. As the first custody hearing date approached, they were exchanging [un]pleasantries over text and my brother ended up saying something along the lines of, 'I'm not continuing this conversation. I will see you on the 15th.' The ex-wife told him, 'The hearing is on the 25th dumba**.'"
"So of course instead of correcting her, my brother just allowed her to keep thinking it was the wrong date, and she missed the first hearing entirely. It became the first of many mistakes she made in the court system that eventually led to my brother and the woman who is now his second wife winning full custody of his son."
Damn_Furries
Follow the Prints
"I'm working on a job site and the architect is there one day. I've been given some light fixtures for the sconces in a leasing office lobby. The fixtures are meant to be hung from a ceiling, they can't be installed on a wall. I attempt to convey this to the architect, but he brushes me off and just tells me to follow the prints."
"I turn to the apprentice and say, well you heard the man, put them up. A bit later, we hear the crashing of glass. The architect asks what was that? I said your light fixture. As I picked up a broom and dustpan to go clean up."
Ohhhhhhthehumanity
No Debt
"As I was being fired from a job, the district manager requested we record the conversation. He thought I was gonna be very upset, so I obliged. Then when he started to tell me why I was being fired he started with, 'You are gonna be graduating college soon, and we want to make sure we get ahead of you leaving us.'"
"I very calmly asked him to send me the recording right after he said that. Then later that day I called a lawyer. I now have no student loan debt."
JRTHEAMAZING
The Screams
"I reminded my ex-wife the divorce court was the next day and was invited to Get F**ked. So I went by myself, she failed to appear and pissed off the Judge so he asked what would be my desired outcome for assets and Custody of the kids. He wrote down whatever I wanted and I could hear her screams when she read the Orders from 3500km away."
comfortablynumb15
Silence
"There's a thing in law enforcement/legalese called a spontaneous utterance. Many many people will bury their own cases with these while bi*ching and moaning at their arresting officer on the way to jail."
raccoonsonbicycles
That last one is good knowledge to have in the back pocket.