People Reveal The Thing They Did That Got Them Grounded That Was Totally Worth It

Look, I'd be lying if I said I didn't spend a fair amount of my life grounded. Usually it was for totally BS stuff (which my parents now admit - they were WAY more strict on me than on either of my siblings and would often "ground" me from books or educational TV for seriously minor offenses in an attempt to force me to go outside... not the best tactic, but at least they can admit it.) There was once, though, that my grounding was deliciously deserved.
Middle school is the literal worst. Everyone is trying to figure themselves out, everyone is weird, nobody has any real maturity - it's a godforsaken Thunderdome out there. She - we won't name names - was terrible to me. She tormented me daily. I was too young, too short, too fat, had weird hair, etc.
I wasn't physically aggressive, but anyone who knows me will tell you I don't typically need to be. My words are - and have always been - cutting. I let her bully me through sixth grade and most of seventh without ever standing up for myself. Then one day she decided to stand behind me and crumple little bits of styrofoam beads into my hair. It took the whole day to get even half of them out of my very ethnic hair. It ruined the hairstyle my mother had carefully spent ages putting in. I got in trouble for it because my parents couldn't possibly believe that I didn't feel it and had nothing to do with it.
I stayed up late and wrote the girl a letter telling her everything I hated about her and how much I hoped she amounted to nothing. I went in. I told her about her big teeth, her crooked nose, the fact that she always smelled like food and feet, how her name was stupid, how her cousin (who she had a super deep familial rivalry with) was way prettier, smarter and nicer than she would ever be, etc.
This letter was PAGES long. I let our entire creative writing class read it before I gave it to her. She cried halfway through the first page but I cornered her and made her finish the whole thing, then when she was done and sobbing I stared her down and told her I hoped she got horse flu to match her horse face and to never come near me again.
Seventh grade savagery was real, folks.
She took the letter home and showed it to her parents, who honestly believed she was an angel and I was just some hateful sociopath. It took a conference with 4 teachers, my parents, her parents and our school bus driver for people to understand that this didn't come from nowhere.
I got SUPER grounded, of course, because I said some things I'm very not proud of and that rightfully horrified all the adults involved. She transferred classes, then left the school. I hadn't considered that letting everyone else read it would turn the tables and she would go from a major bully to the most bullied and mocked girl in the school. Or maybe I had and I figured it was just karma?
Who knows. Either way, I remember not regretting a single moment of my grounding. At all. I was forced to be outside (my least favorite thing ever, to this day) but I was a legend that summer. It was glorious. And that's the story of how I read a girl to filth so badly that she disappeared.
Reddit user I_feel_like_death asked:
What have you done that your parents punished you for, but it was totally worth the punishment?
Honestly, this thread was all kinds of magic, you guys. There may not be any real justice - but there is so much satisfaction.
Consequences!
One time, my younger brother told our mom I hit him. Just walked into my room and started screaming about me hitting him.
I hadn't even looked at him.
So of course, mom comes in, won't hear me AT ALL, and immediately grounds me. My younger brother has this grin on his face.
And I thought, "F--- it...I'm already getting punished for hitting him."
So mom's like, "You're grounded for hitting your brother."
I turned to him, and punched him as hard as I could in his sternum. He DROPPED.
Then I go, "Alright. I'm grounded." And walk away.
Oddly enough, mom didn't say anything at that point. I like to think she realized what was up.
Bonus: My brother never pulled that again.
Consequences!
GlueStick
My grandpa was searching for chapstick all around the house and I ran up to him, handing him a glue stick. I thought he'd realize and laugh. He didn't realize. Not intended, but totally worth the grounding.
The Pants Incident
My friend had pantsed (pulling down someone's pants unexpectedly to reveal their underwear) me the day before and I was itching for the opportunity to get back at him. We had just finished PE class and were lining up for an assembly. He was wearing shorts, so it was the perfect moment.
I snuck up behind him and with one fluid motion pantsed him in front of everyone. I would say it was one of my best pantsings of all time, or at least in the top 10. He was thoroughly embarrassed, but that was the extent of it. I just did to him exactly what he did to me. This was just a weird thing we did in Junior High.
My gym teacher (who notoriously had it out for me the whole year) noticed all the commotion and asked what was going on.
Some kid piped up and snitched on me. She immediately told me to go to the principals office. "That's sexual harrassment.", she said. That was the first time I had even heard those words uttered. I had to go to the principle's office and explain what happened. They called my parents and slapped me with a 3 day suspension.
I came home and my parents were waiting for me in the living room. My dad was strict as hell, and I was constantly frightened of him. I sat down across from him (on the farthest seat across from him no less). He just stared at me, for what felt like hours, with his eyes burning black like the fires of hell. I was terrified.
"Stand up!" he then ordered. I had no idea what he was going to do. And then...he walked up...and in one fluid motion pantsed the living sh*t out of me. "YOU LIKE PULLING PEOPLE'S PANTS DOWN!? I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT IT FEELS LIKE!!"
I burst into tears, with my pants hanging down by my ankles, in total embarrassment and humility. Talk about giving someone a taste of their own medicine.
The Concert In DC
I flew to Washington DC with some friends to see a concert. I told my parents I was at my friends for the weekend. I almost got away with it too, but I left my phone at the concert venue and someone was "nice enough" to look into it and dial the home number and let my parents know they found my phone in DC. This was back in the day when it was basically a flip phone so I would have preferred he stole it. Grounded for about 3 months, no phone, no computer, no tv.
I went to great lengths to hide the trip from my parents too. I switched my debit card to paperless (my dad was a snoop) The flight was really early in the morning, so for a week ahead of time I went to school early everyday and told my parents that I had a study group before class, so it wouldn't seem odd that I was leaving so early that one day. I hid my car in a college parking lot. All to be ruined by some guy trying to do a good thing.
They weren't worried at all. They were pissed lol I had talked to them a few times during that weekend. They were very protective, especially since I'm a girl, so I always "checked in." They were able to get a hold of me right away because I was with the same friend who they thought I was at her house. She answered the phone and acted like I had just left her house, we were at the DC airport on the way home. My dad replied "I know you're in DC, give my daughter the phone."
I saw the immediate fear in my friend's face. I was the one who was scared sh*tless. lol
Good thing that came out of this though, they started loosening up. They saw that I could take care of myself and started to let me travel/roadtrip with my friends as long as I told them first.
Croquet And The Bloody Nose
At my 11th birthday party, my step sisters son (who was also 11) hit me in the back if the head with a croquet ball. On purpose. Once I stopped crying, I punched him in the face hard enough to bloody his nose. My mom spanked me for it. No regrets. He was a mean little sh*t who was always doing stuff then blaming it on me. After I fought back, he pretty much left me alone. And no, he didn't get in trouble for hitting me with the ball.
- katgib13
Gmail
Changed my dad's gmail name to "d*ckface" He couldn't change it back for months. I'm sure doing business was nearly impossible, but it was hilarious.
I was banned from all computers for a year and never allowed the Netflix password (It's not stopping me, by the way.)
The Best Start
My mom was always very strict about my curfew. When a girl from work asked me out for ice cream after the late shift I couldn't refuse. I called my mom told her I was going on a date and I would be home later. She wasn't very happy but I went anyway. That date was the start of one of my best relationships.
Shoplifting
I had a, fortunately short-lived, shoplifting phase when I was 8. I would often steal gum and candy from stores and got away with it for weeks. It came to an end when I got cocky and tried shoving a giant bag of gummies in my pocket.
A man caught me, and he looked me with a concerned face, asking "Are you really going to do that?" He didn't seem like he was going to snitch on me, but he didn't need to.
He scared me so much that I put it back and my mom caught me pulling it out of my pockets. She finally realized why I kept having candy when before she accused my grandma of buying me excessive candy in secret.
I was not allowed to watch TV, play video games, nor go to any friend's house for a month.
I learned to never steal again. It was worth it in that the lesson I learned was valuable.
The Candy Scheme
Candy.
My brother and I were very smart kids. (He still is, I've settled around average.) We came up with a plan to get candy, so much candy. I think we were around 10 at this point.
Our parents would habitually go grocery shopping, and they would take us with them. We were both quite well behaved, and polite, so it wasn't a big deal to bring us along.
Dad usually beelines for the butcher section, while Mom putters around the produce. Dad would pick up something, and hand it to one of us. "Go put this in the cart." This was a weekly thing. (Can you see where this is going?)
My brother and I realize that Mom doesn't question when we put things in on Dad's request. Dad doesn't questions things on the conveyor belt, because Mom must have okayed it.
We got so much candy.
Remember Baby Bottle Pops?
We had, like, 2 packages of them. Gushers. Gummy bears. Chocolate bars. Caramels. Those dip sticks that you lick and stick in powder that changes the colour of your tongue and has the consistency of chalk.
Oh God, it was glorious.
We get in the car, giddy to go home. Mom grumpily says to Dad: "I can't believe you let them buy that much candy."
Dad: "Me? You let them get it!"
There was a pregnant pause as they both turned around in their seats and looked at us.
"Guys. Seriously?"
So we didn't get the candy.They didn't return it, though.
We were grounded for a month, and everything we brought to the shopping cart was now scrutinized.
But it so worth it because about 6 months later we got to eat the candy. Now that we're adults, my Dad still thinks that was one of the most clever things we've ever done.
- Dante_
Laundry
I let a friend do 4 loads of laundry in our basement while my parents weren't home because her family's washer and drier broke and they had 5 kids and no clean clothes. I didn't want my best friend to have to go to school in dirty clothes when I could help her.
My family was not poor by any means and we do laundry constantly so I didn't think there would be any problem with it. We had already finished and just folding the last load of clothes and putting it into her hamper bag when my parents got home.
They waited until she left to yell at me and then 'grounded' me, taking the door off of my room and removing all the 'fun' stuff from my room (books, art supplies, ect) and I wasn't allowed to go anywhere but school for 3 months. My parents are borderline narcissist, this wasn't an unusual punishment or behavior for them. This was just one time where there was a clear reason for their bullshit
They were being selfish assholes and I continued to help my friend do laundry, we just made sure to limit it to 2 loads and made sure she was gone before they were home. Helping her was worth it.
I'd Do It Again
My mom was drunk when my 8 year old little sister told her that she wanted to do some acting in a school play. My sister was notoriously shy and my f*cking mother sat there and told an eight year old that "I don't think you can do it, you're too nervous."
I lost my shit (I was fifteen), all I said was "I can't believe you just told your daughter you don't believe in her!" I got grounded and I'd do it again every day.
Defending Mom's Honor
Aunt of mine on my dad's side used to bully my mother a lot, very condescending and belittling so much so that I recognized this as a young child. My dad would put a stop to it when he was around but he worked a lot... one day this aunt was in the kitchen on the phone and I burst in, wearing full plastic armor, helmet, shield and sword - and stabbed her right in the ass.
She was heavily overweight and I managing to really jam it in there for full effect; bending the sword just above the handle and I believe I managed a slight ass punch too.
She jumped up a remarkable height considering her bulk and let out a Wilhelm scream to rival any.
I was punished, grounded, scolded and told to apologize. But after she left I wasn't grounded and I heard my parents laughing about it when I was in bed.
My aunt is a much nicer person now (she still fears me) but she really was a horrible person back then, bitter and cruel. My mother was never good enough, despite raising 4 kids vs 0 by my aunt and living far away from her own siblings. I think my dad put her straight and told her don't come back until you've sorted your shit out. Worth it.
As much as we always hop for our dating efforts to be worth it and for every relationship to work out, we all know that some relationships are not destined to work out.
But sometimes relationships end for totally valid reasons, and sometimes the reasons are painful, if not devastating.
Redditor overIorded asked:
"What went wrong with your last partner?"
History Repeating Itself
"He cheated on me. And I was glad because that was finally reason enough to allow myself to leave."
"Now I know somebody who's in the same situation. They're trapped. And she's such a gentle and fun person who's afraid to leave him because 'well, it's always been like this, I'm used to it,' and 'I deserve it.'"
"She wants to leave him, she knows she should leave him, but it's so hard to do it, and I know that feeling."
"I'm thinking I should give her my phone number like when the day comes you've had enough, I'll gladly come to help you move out from that s**thole."
- NmlsFool
Mental Health Struggles
"I'm lost in my own trauma and mental illness and he deserves better than anything I have to offer right now."
- Last-Celery7146
"I’ve been on the receiving end of this, and mildly said, it absolutely ruined me. Her trauma and mental problems were BAD, but I still wanted to be with them. So if you ask me, as long as they can give you the space and support you need, and want to be with you, let them make the decision."
- emilersen
"It's also fair and mature to care very much about someone but realize that you only have the emotional bandwidth to take care of yourself right now."
"I'm sure it was very hard for both of you to come to terms with that decision. I don't think it's that he deserves better, I think it's that your attention needs to be on guiding yourself through this thicket of trauma and mental illness before you can be someone else's partner. You can love each other very much but also acknowledge that you don't have the tools to spare for a relationship right now."
"I'm proud of you for focusing on your own mental health and someday, when you have more emotional stability and energy, I hope you find a wonderful partner."
- SpoonAtKnifeFight
Relationship Styles
"We disagreed on how many women he was allowed to date. I’m very strong on monogamy and have no interest in someone (in a supposedly committed relationship) that isn’t."
- Altrano
At Least There's That
"Her psychotic brother tried to kill me. Thankfully he has a Stormtrooper's aim..."
- Active-Plate7939
"Hate the attempted murder, love the 'Star Wars' reference."
- letmetellyousom
Childfree Living
"He wanted a big family, like, six kids, all-natural. Obviously, he wouldn't be birthing them. This was very important to him while I was pretty ambivalent about kids, and the further into my adulthood I've gotten, the more I've realized I just don't want to be pregnant."
"I broke it off so we could both get the lives we wanted. He was also quite a bit more conservative than me, and at the time closeted pansexual person, and some stuff he believed just didn't line up with what I believed. It hurt, but it was amicable."
"Now he has a wife and kids like he wanted, and I am happily partnered and childfree. It worked out for the best."
- Free-Government5162
Family Ties
"She hated that I had a healthy relationship with my family and was trying to find ways to sabotage it."
- Cobra-Serpentress
"Similar aspect to mine, she hated my sister and mother because she had a bad relationship with her sister and mother. She would get mad at me whenever I brought my family up."
- letmetellyousom
Quality Time
"My last boyfriend dumped me because I got mad that he was coming to Dallas after I hadn't seen him for two months, but didn't want to see me."
"He was going to meet up with some friends of his he hadn't seen in a few months. I told him that was fine with me, but I felt he should make time to see me too since we hadn't seen each other in two months and we were supposed to be a couple."
"He responded to my anger by ghosting me. That was two years ago."
- dallasmysterylover
Distracted with a Punch
"A girl contacted me about him talking to her. I asked him what was going on, and he sucker-punched me in the face."
- Brilliant-Victory128
Projecting Insecurities
"He cheated on me for all six years we were together and then accused me of cheating on him, even though I wasn't allowed to leave the house."
"I'm also pretty sure he slept with my sister-in-law when my brother and I went to pick up dinner."
- Affectionate_Egg1252
Children Come First
"He was and still is no father to his kids, has anger issues, and probably has other mental health issues. I tried for years to help him and help the relationship, but he wasn't having it. After seeing how my oldest suffered under him, I had to leave."
- rintan13
Poor Communication
"I communicated how I felt about many things in the relationship. He never communicated about anything."
- aj_oof0323
"Oh look, it's the last 14 years of my life..."
- empathetic111
"I'm guilty of this, and boy, do I regret not being able to open up about my feelings. It cost me my marriage. But now I'm trying to be more open and share my thoughts and feelings. Just wished I could've done this earlier than later."
Deserving Better
"I started drinking again and became a miserable a**hole due to my own depression and my s**tty job. As such, she didn't get the attention she deserved, and had to put up with my s**tty mood all the time... so she left. I don't blame her."
"So, it was me. I don't know if I trust myself with a relationship again, but aside from the shame of knowing I hurt someone who I loved, and loved me back, but I was too self-absorbed and selfish, I am trying to be a better human to everyone."
"And to my ex: You'll find someone again... someone better."
- cracksintheegg
Big Moves
"He wanted to move to Alaska to be with some girl he was 'friends' with before me."
- dont_be_trash
Alzheimer's Disease
"My ex's early-onset Alzheimers (at the age of 50) and the resulting violence, paranoia, and irrational thinking. I tried to honor my vows, but he was so far out there, I feared for my life."
- No_Transportation258
Different Definitions of Marriage
"She cheated on me after five years total together, the last one of which was while we were engaged. She cheated on me for months, all while I was planning the wedding, working part-time, and going to graduate school so I can support us comfortably in the future."
"I planned on giving her everything I could and sharing the rest of my life with her, and apparently she didn’t care."
- Mountaingoat1001
This conversation just goes to show that relationships can end for all kinds of reasons. Even in relationships where there is still a lot of love and committment, the relationship can still end, just like how the relationship can end suddenly because of a surprising and devastating realization.
We all had our aspirations about becoming a certain type of person or accomplishing different goals when looking towards the future.
But the goals we have for ourselves can drastically change once we're adults, and that's partly due to the influence of different life experiences.
Sometimes, despite our best intentions and respective strategies to achieve something by a certain age, we can never imagine experiencing different outcomes.
Curious to hear from strangers online who never saw themselves in their current positions in life, Redditor graces-taylor12 asked:
"What about becoming an adult caught you completely off guard?"
The following Redditors were not ready to process the inevitable when it came to their parents.
A Role Reversal
"Watching your parents becoming old and frail."
– Mrbusybaconandeggs
"Dealing with this yesterday and it is an eye-opener. Its hard seeing someone you’ve known as a pillar of strength for 30+ years in a position of such weakness, and knowing that he might improve but generally the decline is coming."
– Rook1872
Age-Defying
"I've had a weird atypical experience. My dad was pretty old when I was born and always had a bad knee he could never afford to get fixed. He could barely walk and has never been able to run since I could remember. It got so bad that he couldn't even walk up or down the stairs in our house."
"Well he eventually got a knee replacement and he's now more agile at 73 than he was at 53. It's weird to see."
– Downtown_Skill
Sad Epiphany
"I'll never forget when I first realized how frail they actually were. I went over to their house to help out with some chores, and they couldn't even clean out any of the pens by themselves. They ended up selling most of their animals that year because they couldn't look after them."
– thecanadiancowboy
Life Can Be Cruel
"It’s slowly beginning with my parents, small hints here and there, they’re in their mid 50s.The big freak out for me has been watching my grandparents slowly declining over the last 3ish years. One set of grandparents have been gone since I was a kid, so these two are all I’ve got now. My Pap’s arthritis and sciatica is to the point now where it’s a process for him just to stand up. 2020 I saved him from a fall, if I wasn’t there to catch him, he would’ve easily been in the hospital for quite a while. That was the first 'Oh sh*t, he’s not immortal' moment."
– NoinePiecesOfVinyl
These Redditors discovered older doesn't always mean wiser.
Wake-Up Call
"I can do whatever the f'k I want. But I don't really want to do anything..."
– IcarusWax
"Yup, the idea of doing whatever you want as an adult was the biggest scam cartoons sold us."
"Yeah, you can do anything you want but you're gonna need money. So you get a job, there goes most of your day to your job."
"So now you have money but that'll go to bills first and by the time you can do what you want you don't have the energy or funds. Then the loop continues.."
– JimmyJackJericho
Fake It Til You Make It
"How clueless other adults are. I really thought adults had their sh*t in order while in reality most people are winging it."
–= xepci0
"Maturity is a skill. Some people learn it quickly. Others never do."
"Children are limited by their youth. Their brains aren't fully developed. But adults are not guaranteed to get more mature without working for it."
"Some people never grow up. They just get old."
– snapwillow
Being Independent
"I'm surprised by the amount of people who genuinely couldn't live by themselves if they had to. They somehow never learned basic life skills like simple cooking or cleaning and always had someone else to do it for them."
– CliffExcellent123
People became more aware of time.
Not Enough Me Time
"How little free time you have. You have to work, you have to prepare for work, drive to work, drive home from work. You also have to do household chores. You have to take care of kids if you have some. When do I get to enjoy my hobbies?"
– lllSnowmanlll
Point Of Exhaustion
"Most of the time I'm so tired from the day, I just don't have the mental capacity to do anything but go right to bed and watch tv ;_;"
– WitherWithout
Never Going Back
"Transitioning from college student + part time worker to full time worker I gained a bunch of time back. I was shocked that I could just decide to do laundry tomorrow if I didn't feel like it. Every evening I had this huge chunk of time that was just open."
"But then, moving from an apartment to a house, now there's a bunch more chores to do. Then introducing kids, now there's all that. But still, I wouldn't go back to the hectic college life."
– civilwarcorpses
Marking Time
"How it just goes on endlessly."
"When you're a kid, there's a summer break every year, and a new school to go to in a couple of years. Whatever part of your life you are in is clearly delimited and there is something new to look forward to after it."
"Once you're an adult, it's just 5 days of work and 2 days of weekend over and over and over until you die."
– Suitable_Mistake2208
After having a decent, long run in the entertainment business as a dancer, I've long held the belief I was invincible.
I was physically stronger, more agile, and foolish enough to think I could perpetually live in such a state.
All of a sudden, reality smacked me in the face one morning when I woke up and heard and felt various parts of my body crackle and pop like when milk hits a bowl of Rice Krispies.
My tired body had the audacity to inform me:
"Not today and from this day forward."
We're currently not on speaking terms.
Not much good can come from dwelling on the past.
Even so, no matter how hard we try to avoid doing so, we can't help but look back on things we've done in our lives which we regret.
In some cases, it's nothing which had any sort of lasting effect, like wishing we thought more carefully about where we had a birthday or spending more than we could afford on an outfit that didn't end up paying off.
In sadder cases though, we often wonder what our lives might have been like if he had made a different, and smarter decision.
If we didn't say certain things to certain people, not spoken up when someone needed us to or rushed too hastily into a life we weren't ready for.
"What is one thing you regret doing in life?"
Giving People Attention Who Didn't Deserve It
"Wasting time worrying about people that never spared me a single thought."- Eborys
Getting In With The Wrong Crowd
"I regret making friends with people who I knew were bad for me just because it was easier than becoming friends with good people."
"Now I don't have many solid friends."- misswallflowerr
Staying In, When They Should Have Gotten Out
"Not ending bad/unhealthy/unfulfilling relationships sooner."- Superseriouslyguys
"Hanging on to a relationship for too long."
"I should have up and disappeared the first time he was disrespectful."- Mirrorflute88
Not Taking Enough Risks
"Not putting myself out there enough."
"I probably missed out on a lot of opportunities because I'm so self-conscious."
"Working on this though!"- Fife_Flyer
"Not following my dreams and ended up sitting behind a desk for 30 years."
"Of course, I'm currently on Reddit sitting behind my desk."
"So, there's that."- CatOnTheHill
"Overthinking my way out of potentially rewarding choices."- mmmmike1590
Rushing Into Things
"Going to college before I had the slightest idea what I wanted to do with my life."- Mysterious_Shake2894
Taking Things For Granted
"Not spending more time with my mom."
"I visited her 2-3 times a week but still, there were other times she'd call and I'd ignore the call or tell her I didn't have time to talk."
"Would give anything to go back and take every one of those calls."- Fruitjustlistens
Putting Their Health At Risk
"Most of 2019–addiction bottom."
"Sober now for 432 days and counting."- CommunicationTop5231
"Smoking."
"20 years spent on expensive, self-fed poison."
"Biggest regret of my life, by far."- Itsprobablysarcasm
Undervaluing Self-Worth
"Mentally exhausting myself at work for companies that turned out to not give a sh*t about me or value my work."- fpuni107
"Being too nice to tell undeserving people to f*ck off when I should've been putting myself first."
"Lessons learned."- MrsHppy
Not Having Enough Fun
"So, this is gonna sound kinda dumb, but I kinda wish I had acted out a bit more."
"Taken more risks, gotten in trouble more, explored and pushed my boundaries."
"I was pretty sheltered growing up and really wanted to be this good person."
"It created a lot of conflicting feelings for me."
"It also contributed to me avoiding doing some stuff cause I thought it'd be bad for me."
"Now that I'm older and worked through some of those issues, I feel like I missed out on a lot of stuff other people got in their teens and 20s."
"I'm now at a point where I'm exploring that, but most people my age have already gone through it."
"I just feel like I'm trying to 'catch up' with everybody."- animewhitewolf
It's only human to look back on things we regret, or wish we had done differently.
But living in the past will only keep us in the past.
The only way to move forward and make progress is to accept the present for what it is: a present.
Serving in the military is not for the faint of heart.
There are so many dangerous aspects to the job.
When people discuss it, we think about war and the sacrifice people make with their lives.
But there is a ton of scandal involved with the military.
Over the years, so much information has leaked about bad behavior and just everyday nonsense.
Just because a person becomes a soldier doesn't mean they're perfect.
Redditor AdRealistic03 wanted to discuss the shocking things we've all learned about our armed forces, so they asked:
"What are some NSFW secrets about the military?"
The military is littered with secrets, and I love secrets. Tell me more...
Hey Girl
"Been in for a long while now, the most apt descriptor I've heard:"
"'Gayest bunch of straight dudes you'll ever meet.'"
Tak_Jaehon
Baby Guards
"Our Air Force’s most critical asset, nuclear weapons, are primarily guarded by a bunch of really bored teenagers."
it_helper
"Navy is the same. The guy that Naruto runs to the galley is the same one that stands watch over the nuclear reactor."
satanyourdarklord
"Lowest ranks pull guard duties more often."
"Who's the lowest rank? That baby faced 18 year old who just joined up."
"Guard duties are up there as one of the most bone taskings going."
Daewoo40
The Side Hustle
"Sometimes the guy that administers the drug test is the same one that you get the drugs from."
Lazy-Plum-19
"I was our unit's drug test guy. I smoked weed every day because I obviously would not drug test myself. I was also really good at it so they wouldn't give the job to someone else. I could get our tests done and completed without mistakes in like 1/5 of the time of my predecessor. Didn't sell drugs, but I've given plenty away."
Changnesia_survivor
Oh My
"Swingers exist on every single base in the world, in Sigonella, they would use different boxes of detergent in the windows to show what they were into and what age range they were looking for. Patrolling the housing area became much more interesting when you see who lives in the houses and what they’re into."
catfartzz
Multi-Purpose
"The food boxes that come in literally say 'For prison and military use only.'"
BlackLotus8888
"My husband was watching a documentary with people in prison and was like hey we have the same blankets on the ship."
PricklyPix
No matter who eats it, it's been said nobody thinks any of that food tastes good.
How many?
"I was selected 6 times in a row to be a urinalysis checker. Have seen over 2000 penises involuntarily."
Jarhead-Coffee
Bad Intentions
"The number of people who get sick and tired of being in the service who will go out and do some drug or another to get kicked out. During our Iraq/Afghanistan years, you wouldn't believe how many people would purposely pee hot or, females would intentionally get pregnant to get out of going."
Blackhawk-388
Not Sexy
"A friend of mine in the special forces told me since they are out in the field a lot, they get plenty of ticks. And while you can inspect yourself fairly well, you can’t inspect everything, so they pair up and spread their cheeks, and your mate has to stare into your anus to check you for ticks in there. Not very glamorous."
Litenpes
Health Issues
"Looooooottttts of chlamydia."
Triatomine
"My unit in Okinawa had the highest STD rate for the island. I was so glad I wasn't a part of any of that."
FightingNymph
Trashed
"Our oceans are loaded with garbage. LOADED."
"I would watch the long trail of garbage follow my ship, in the wake, as crew dumped the s**t off the fantail. Every single day. Miles and miles of trash. And this was just one ship. This was just one nation. Our oceans are full of garbage that will take centuries to erode. Our waters are littered with sh*t that fish are eating and dying on."
eyehate
Sounds like there is A LOT of fraternization in our Armed services.
Be careful out there.