People Share Their Craziest 'Glitch In The Matrix' Experiences
So that happened...
Image by Ashutosh Goyal from Pixabay |
Blue pill or red pill? That is the question. Everyday feels like a computer game gone awry, or like we're all stars in our versions of the Matrix films. Life too often feels unreal and like a virus is corrupting the download. We all have to be our own personal Neo. Déjà Vu or Matrix, the universe can be a tricky mistress.
Redditor u/mailseuuu wanted to discuss the times when life seemed a bit... off... by asking... Was there a moment wherein you thought it was a "glitch in the matrix"? What are your stories?I've lost track of the amount of times I lost an item only to discover it in a place I KNOW I scoured earlier. Or who hasn't had a television restart once you've turned it off? How about hearing distant voices in the night? Just me? Let's see...
Vanished
Magic Vanish GIF by VPROGiphyOne time when I was like 8, I was rolling a toy plane (I distinctly remember it was an F117 stealth fighter) across my desk.
It rolled off my desk and just disappeared. I didn't lose it. It just disappeared. There was nowhere for it to go and I never found it again.
The Shadow
I have a very visually distinctive necklace. Well one day. After I took it off just it disappeared . I looked and looked for it finally giving up and wrote my necklace off as lost forever.
A few weeks later I was dusting the ceiling fan when I noticed a shadow in the light globe. So I undone the globe from off the fan. Thinking the shadow was maybe a bug. No bug. The shadow was my necklace.
DOOM
I preordered the special edition of Doom 3 and it came with a little pewter figurine of one of the monsters in the game. I accidentally knocked it off my desk and never heard it hit the ground, never saw it again. My room was carpeted so like, there's a chance I might not have heard the sound it made, but I looked freaking everywhere for it and could never find it. I lived in that room for four years after that, constantly rearranging and moving around, never saw it. And there was nothing under the desk it could've fallen into either. So weird.
On Loop
Oh My God Omg GIF by BarryGiphyEjected the CD and the music kept going. Four of us in the car were like "we are dead, this is limbo, what is going on".
They... just... disappear...
I have a desk that glitches all the time. Whenever I eat on it and I spill a piece of my food, the piece just freaking disappears. It happened to me 3 times this week already.
I call it the "quantum table".
The spilled pieces are quite large (meat, or vegetables). They don't fall to the ground (I've checked hundreds of times). They're not beneath it either (it's a simple table, it has nothing underneath like drawers). They... just... disappear. That amount of spilled food should pile up somewhere! But they are just gone. Forever.
Damn Cats
When I wear necklaces I have a tendencies to spin the pendant when I'm stressed. I remember one day I was rapidly spinning a necklace on my way to one of my classes and the pendant flew off. I didn't bother to look for it. I had to get to class and luckily it was a relatively cheap piece of jewelry.
A few months later I move about 1.5 hours away to a new town. About a year into being there, I come home and what do I see sitting on my bed? My pendant. My then gf said she found one of the cats playing with it by the stove and figured it had been knocked under there and they dug it out. But... how?
See now I knew I wasn't alone. We all have moments that seem like their part of either a ghostly experience or we're all characters in a real life "Truman Show." And I'm not sure that's how I want to become famous.
Huntsville Tales
We visited the spaceflight center in Huntsville a few years ago and I got an A-12 (looks like the SR-71) coffee cup. I started drinking coffee in it every day and for more than a year, everything was normal. I wake up, go pour coffee, drink it downstairs, wash it, then go back to work in my office upstairs.
Sometimes, I get a second cup of coffee and bring it up to my office and then bring it down when I'm done to wash and reset for the next day.
On May 1 of last year, I forgot to bring it back downstairs from my office. Next morning, I wake up and go downstairs to have a cup of coffee like usual in my A-12 cup I got from the Space & Rocketry Center in Huntsville, AL. When I'm done, I wash it and put it away and go upstairs to start work...
...and there's the cup from the day before with an inch of cold coffee in it.
I bring it downstairs, trying to figure out what's going on and the one I just used is still sitting in the drying rack.
I now have two A-12 coffee cups. In the months since, they've both picked up a little bit of their own character, but at the time I brought the original and its doppelcupper together, they had the same scuff marks and were in every way I could tell identical.
I don't have an explanation for how this happened. I don't know how this cup somehow duplicated or why or how to do it again, but what I DO have... is two A-12 cups even though I only bought one.
The Drop
bunny rubbing GIFGiphyMy brother got a lucky rabbits foot keychain. I was tossing it in the air and catching it. One time it went up, but didn't come down. 30 years later I was working in the ceiling and found it on the heat duct that was covered by a drop ceiling.
Which One are You?
There was a girl at a place I worked that I flirted with for a couple months. It was weird because she sometimes seemed a LOT more interested than others, like aggressively.
One day I finally got the nerve up to ask her out and she said yes.
So that weekend, I show up at her house to picker her up, and when the front door opens, there are two of them - twins!
Turns out they took turns working the job, and the one I asked out - not aggressive - was just as nervous as I was, so her sister was acting like a wing...girl (?) to encourage things to happen.
We all got a good laugh out of it, and I dated her for about a year. At work it was always funny to try and figure out who was actually working after that, although I did get better after we'd been dating for a bit.
Hannah
Season 15 Kiss GIF by The BacheloretteGiphyI woke up in the morning and saw a trailer for a movie named Hannah. I was then scrolling through my Google calendar and saw it was my friend Hannah's birthday.
Later on in the night I had some friends come over and we were about to go to a bar, I ordered doordash and the delivery girl's name was Hannah. I went out that night and got a girl named Hannah's number who I dated for about 6 months. Nothing else came up the relationship but that was an extremely bizarre coincidence and follow-up circumstance. It made me really consider the matrix theory.
All the Coins
I had a quantum carpet in my room as a kid. I remember spilling a jar of change on my carpet a mix of all stuff pennies, dimes, quarters etc.
I found like... A handful of the coins and that's it.
Wasn't a shag carpet that could hide the coins, not like 50+ coins all rolled away out of sight or anything.. But they were just gone.
Tossed
I tossed my first cheapo mp3 player at my desk and it never landed. I figured I overshot somehow and it was in my closet. Nope. Not in any of my shoes, not somehow caught in a fold or pocket. Wasn't under the desk or anywhere else. It simply ceased to exist. Never did find it.
Roku Away
Mobile App Streaming GIF by RokuGiphyMy roku remote. i was asleep, it was like 7:00 am and i wake up, I don't see the remote. i assume it fell off the side of my bed near the wall, I check under, nope. not there. nothing. It was just gone. Had a hard time convincing my mom.
Just Roll
I once found a 20 sided dice (that I had lost a few years prior in America) in the middle of a desert in Israel.
It was the exact same dice as well. I remember because it was the same coloring and had the same scratched off number as well.
I'm going to get my D&D group together to head off to Israel, I guess. We've collectively lost a bunch of dice.
Go Fish
Years ago I lost a can of tuna. I took it out of the pantry to make a sandwich, but then decided to just have cereal, and put it back. Before I got the cereal I changed my mind again and took the can back out of the pantry and set it down. I had been craving tuna on toast with extra tomato and had bought it the evening before specifically to make that.
I get the can opener and the can was gone. I looked all over the kitchen and never found it. I even checked the pantry and sure enough I was missing a can. I had bought a certain number like 4 for a dollar or something. This was in the 90's.
"abracadabra"
I was maybe around 5 years old. Pretending to be a magician. I put a pen in this big activity book and waved my hands over it and said "abracadabra" to make the pen disappear. The pen literally disappeared. The bulge you would see of a pen being in a book was gone. Looked through the entire book. Look around the floor. Couldn't find it. Never found it. We moved out of that house when I was 11 and never found the pen.
Trash Miracle
miracle GIFGiphyI dropped a piece of A4 paper at work and it landed stood up on the short edge. It wasn't bent or folded, literally a fresh sheet of paper just standing all by itself.
Whats more, it happened twice whilst I was at that work place. Never seen it happen again.
Fast Pass
I walked by my colleague who was having a conversation. The convo definitely continued after I passed. I walked another 150 meters, went up a staircase, and walked by a room. My colleague was in that room, talking to another person. I was shook. Later in the day I verified that I had indeed passed her.
I asked how she could have gotten past me and she just said "I'm a fast walker." You ain't THAT fast. She would have had to run up a different staircase, outpace me in the same hall but one floor above. I just didn't see how it happened.
I Awoke...
My bedroom at the time lead into the living room that you could see into the kitchen. We also had a bathroom that was directly off our room, in the corner. You couldn't get to it unless you were in our room.
I woke up one afternoon. I remember sitting up, checking my phone and lighting a cigarette.
I got out of bed, opened the bedroom door, walked into the living room to turn the thermostat up. I saw my ex in the kitchen fiddling around with the coffee pot. Then he started walking towards the back of the house, into the other bedroom. I said "Hey! You're up early." He looked at me, and kept on walking. I went back into our room and sat on the bed.
After a few minutes I called his name, and he opened the bathroom door and said "yeah?"
Apparently he was in the bathroom the whole time. I was very confused and super freaked out because I could have sworn I saw him in the kitchen. There's no way it was him if he was in the bathroom. It shook me up pretty bad.
Dream Repeat
Occasionally I will fall asleep and dream at night and recognize the dream from when I was a very little kid (I'm 31) and basically pick up from where I left off. This has happened with 5 separate dreams now.
As in I'll dream I'm in a particular place doing a particular thing and remember inside the dream that I left off here when I was 6 and this is what happened before I reached this point.
Sometimes the Universe is sending messages we need to hear. And other times it's just playing tricks on us. Start taking notes of strange happenings. the coincidences add up.
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People Who Know Someone Who Died In A Freak Accident Share Their Experiences
Reddit user RawAsparagus asked: 'People who knew someone who died in a freak accident, what happened?'
TRIGGER WARNING:This article contains sensitive content about death and injury.
Sometimes, on a completely uneventful day, while someone is doing something they've always done, something goes terribly wrong. An accident occurs.
Sometimes, the person is lucky enough to make it. Other times, they are not.
These are total freak accidents -- harmful incidents that occur under unusual and unlikely circumstances.
I don't have any experience with this myself, but Redditors do. They are now sharing the stories of how people they knew died in freak accidents.
It all started when Redditor RawAsparagus asked:
"People who knew someone who died in a freak accident, what happened?"
A Nasty Death
"I used to work for a septic company. A guy who drove one of the big septic trucks that sucked out underground septic tanks at people's houses had to get on his hands and knees and reach into the tank because the lid had fallen in. He lost his balance and fell head first in. His shoulders got wedged in the opening and he drowned upside down in human waste. I don't think I've ever heard of a worse way to go. The homeowner found him after about an hour."
– Claytrain1989
Neck Injuries Are No Joke
"A family friend bumped his head, walked about 15 feet across his back yard, sat at his picnic table and died."
"Autopsy showed no head trauma, but he broke his neck when he hit his head. They figured the walk across the yard caused something to shift enough to do fatal damage to his spinal cord."
– Blundell1992
"My sister came so close to dying in a somewhat similar way. She was in a car accident and was pulled out of the wreckage by some friends. She was guided to some grass by the side of the road to sit and wait for the ambulance. She apparently kept saying her neck was really sore & was asking people to help her “pop” it. Thankfully, her friends were smart enough to encourage her to leave it alone. She gets to the hospital & some yahoo either doesn’t read the x-ray or reads it wrong & agrees that her neck is just sprained or something & wants to send her home. Somehow, someway, they ended up transferring her to another hospital before that happened who discovered her badly broken neck which required surgery to fix and left her with permanent nerve damage. I have NO IDEA how she didn’t end up paralyzed or dead. She has the stupidest luck where the most random bad things will happen to her but she turns out fine in the end lol"
– Aggravating-Jaguar96
Poor Guy
"A guy I knew was setting up a rope swing over a lake for his kids and their friends, which he had done many times before. He always would take a practice swing himself before he would let the kids go. His hands slipped off the rope and he fell before he was over the lake. He hit his head on a rock and died in front of the kids."
– highvolt132
Why I'm Scared Of Animals
"Former co-worker of mine was gored by a bison while on a trail run. Ironically, he often posted on message boards for the park to be aware of wild animals while there, and in one post he said there are too many people with headphones on, or trying to get too close to the bison to take selfies. He was normally very careful apparently."
– doctor-rumack
Before Life Even Started
"Lovely girl I went to HS with got a scholarship to a prestigious university, being one of the very few students from my sh*tty school to make it to college or uni. Two weeks into term her room mate found her laying in her bed dead. The heating boiler was faulty and she'd died of carbon monoxide poisoning in her sleep. We'd even thrown a party for her to celebrate her achievement. This was in 1996 and I'm tearing up a bit thinking about this. RIP Sonia."
– Johhnymaddog316
Adrenaline
"A friend of a friend showed up at his girlfriend's apartment with a head wound. He didn't know how it happened. He also didn't know how he drove over there."
"She took him to the ER where he ended up passing away."
"He had his keys, wallet and phone on him."
"The only thing we could think of is he might have tripped, fell and hit his head in the wrong spot."
– cbpantskiller
"It was probably muscle memory that got him there."
"How awful."
– BoringMcWindbag
"Or adrenaline. There was a woman who got attacked by a bear on her isolated mountain ranch. After fighting off the bear (with the help of her dogs), she got in her car and drove several miles down precarious mountain roads to the nearest fire station with her face ripped clean off and, IIRC, one eyeball dangling out of its socket. She said she was almost totally blind and going into shock, but a combination of muscle memory and adrenaline somehow got her down the mountain safely."
"She did an AMA on reddit once. Cool lady. She wrote a memoir, too."
"EDIT TO ADD: Her name was Allena Hansen. I read her memoir and I quite liked it. She's a funny woman who has lived a very interesting life, even aside from the bear attack."
– eldestdaughtersunion
Frozen
"I was snowboarding in 1997 in Switzerland with a good friend. He was skiing. I had caught en edge and landed on the back of my head while also twisting my knee badly. I was being looked over by the mountain rescue and first aid. I told my friend he could keep skiing, i would head back to our villa."
"I ended up going to sleep at around 6pm as I had a hot shower and some tylenol 3s after dinner. I woke up to see my friend hadn't returned and thought it was odd but maybe he hooked up with a lady at some bar."
"Friend never came back from skiing. He was found deep in a crevasse the next afternoon and frozen to death."
– rayrayrayray
A Legitimate Fear
"A friend slipped and fell in the tub. Cracked his head. His roommate found him a half hour later. Died on the way to the hospital."
– HypeMachine231
"I've always been afraid of falling and dying in a bathroom."
– Morlanticator
"I tore my shoulder labrum falling in the shower. It seems like such an elderly person sort of way to get hurt, but I’m not old. Non-slip tub mats are like five bucks, people. It’s a good investment."
– the_cadaver_synod
Always Use A Spotter
"The TV station I worked at previously had a gym in it, and during the midnight shift, the security guard, during his break, decided to lift some weights alone in the gym. He lifted the bar, which was apparently too heavy, and it came crashing down and cut off his circulation. No one discovered him until about six hours later when someone came in to use the shower in the gym."
– phisigtheduck
Pinned
"My uncle was mowing grass on an embankment next to a small body of water. The mower unexpectedly slipped down the embankment and overturned on top of him, pinning him under the water. He drowned in a few feet of water that he otherwise could have stood up in."
– apatheticnihilist
"When my mom was working in hospitals, they had a patient whose tractor rolled over him and he fell into a ditch with water. He was so lucky because he was on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere and when he rolled over, a car passed by. The woman driving rushed to his aid and held his head out of the water. This was before cellphones so she had to wait holding him until another car drove by and then rushed to the nearest house to use the phone. Guy made a full recovery thanks to that woman being there at the exact right time."
– BlackChimaera
A Horrible Accident
"An old buddy I had known since elementary school died while driving when a chunk of loose gravel was kicked up through his windshield by a passing truck on the freeway. His best friend had been riding in the passenger side and had to steer the car to safety. It was nobody’s fault, just a complete freak accident. I’ve always felt terrible for the friend who had to watch it happen."
"I think about my friend who died a lot. He was a really cool guy. I still remember playing basketball with him during recess when we were kids. It’s strange to think that he never could have known how his life would end or see it coming in any way. That kid I used to play basketball thought he still had an entire life ahead of him."
– an_edgy_lemon
See A Bump, Go To A Hospital
"A mom went ice skating. Little slip, fell, all everyone saw was her bump her head lightly."
"Family finished skating. On the ride home, she started speaking gibberish. Dad dropped kids at the grandparents, took mom to the ER."
"Brain swelling, coma, dead a week later."
– Expert-Diamond6467
Honestly, I've always been scared of dying from a head injury that doesn't seem serious at the time. Always, always, always get checked out!
Dating experiences can be incredibly fun and even formative, but it can also be full of tough and painful lessons.
With each relationship, we're bound to learn things that we don't like or aren't looking for in our next partner.
Redditor Valuable-Ad440 asked:
"What do you think the biggest mistake is that people make in relationships?"
Not Apologizing
"Not being able to apologize. If someone tells you they're upset with you, you don't need to argue back."
- TheGame1126
Being Defensive
"Not being able to hear your partner expressing their own needs or constructive critiques without getting defensive."
"You should be able to hear your partner out with concern and curiosity, and THEN address your own feelings that happened as a result of their words. If you can’t have a difficult conversation without being overwhelmed by your own insecurities, you’re not ready to be in a relationship."
- greengiant1101
Too Many Compromises
"Compromising when they started the relationship, and then regret sets in and destroys the relationship."
- Damseldoll
(Not) Winning Arguments
"Trying to 'win' arguments. The goal should be to solve disagreements as a team, not come out as the victor."
- DoublePelix
Not Dating Their Best Friend
"Your partner not being your friend, too."
- Wonderful-Note9289
"Back when we were dating, my wife once told me that I was her boyfriend, but also her friend. I found that odd. Then she pointed out that her ex never had had the potential to be her friend. They just didn't match."
"Since then, I realized how important this is."
- Lvcivs2311
Lack of Communication or Acceptance
"So many people jump straight to 'lack of communication,' but more often than not the problem is refusing to accept what your partner is communicating."
"Communication skills can always be better, but a lack of understanding or willingness to compromise around the difference in each other's needs leads to resentment really quickly. Once you resent each other, it's game over, there's no real way to come back from that."
- alk6489
Taking Others for Granted
"Taking the other person’s love, time, empathy, or patience for granted."
- thebuffyb0t
"Or holding onto a relationship that isn't making you happy out of some hope that the other person will stop taking those things for granted."
"Both are non-starters."
- sophistre
Different Values
"I would rephrase this as 'people are their values and what they value.'"
"If you want a big family and they want to be child-free, you’re not compatible."
"If you are a homebody and they have wanderlust, one of you is going to be miserable."
"If they are fixated on their career and external signs of success and you are more interested in experiences and togetherness, you’re both going to resent each other."
"If you have significantly different political outlooks, it’s going to poison how you see each other over time."
"The first person to say yes to you may not be the right person for you long term. You need to talk about your values and life goals, and if they don’t align, don’t sit there hoping the other person will compromise who they are for you, or expect yourself to compromise who you are for them."
"Respect each other enough to recognize you aren’t the right life partner and move on."
- Fraerie
Getting Married First
"Waiting until you’re too far in to discuss marriage and kids. That’s an issue that needs to be hammered in before you completely shut yourself off from anyone else."
- DefinitelyNotADave
"Tons of people have those tough discussions way too late. Kids, in-law interactions and responsibilities, finances, living situations, household chores, medical issues, and future plans ALL should be discussed before getting married."
"If you don't have an answer for that now, you're going to have to find an answer soon enough. All of these things WILL be faced throughout your lifetime together. It's better to find out if you're completely incompatible before signing that paper. Or at least you've got a plan of how to face things together."
- buyongmafanle
Helping Around At Home
"My girl has been on vacation for about two weeks and f**k, I hate cooking, man!"
"I should help her prep some of the food. It's just more time-consuming than anything else. But yeah, when she gets back, I'll start helping her more. I eat a s**t ton, so yeah."
- Deads4dayz
"Start now, impress her with your effort when she gets back, and tell her you realized how much time she was putting in. Can't go wrong."
- orionicly
"Learn some knife skills on youtube, it can cut your prep time by 50% easily. I've seen people spend ten minutes on a single onion, smh (shaking my head)."
- DaoNight23
"And clean as you cook! Something is simmering on the stove and you can step away for five minutes? Don’t kill time on the couch, clean your workstation! Then when it’s time to serve, you have only a minimal amount of cleanup left to do."
- Youareaharrywizard
"CAYG or Clean As You Go is taught in professional kitchens everywhere for a reason, it’s a proven strategy to keep things clean."
"That and 'if you have time to lean, you have time to clean,' but that one is less popular."
- its_justme
Getting Too Comfortable
"I think it's a combination of getting so comfortable with somebody that you take things for granted, stop doing the little things, and stop communicating."
- Rathemon
"Been feeling this recently. My girlfriend and I moved in together nearly two years ago, and our relationship improved so much when we did, but it has led to me taking things for granted."
"I'm traveling at the moment, and I haven't seen her in nearly a month, and I'm really missing just existing together. Even something as simple as sleeping next to each other, I miss it like crazy, but it's not something I think of as much when we're both at home."
- V0lkhari
Committing 100/100
"Thinking that it's one person's work. A successful relationship needs commitment and work from both parties."
- Mapache_villa
"I find that as the woman, I’m usually carrying the emotional load and it’s f**king exhausting. Talking about feelings, initiating tough conversations, etc. I won’t do it anymore."
- pattimay_ho_nnaise
Having Children to Love
"Believing that having a child will fix their problems."
"Great job, now the THREE of you are in a sucky situation and now are forever tied through a choice you both made instead of just working it out OR separating, both options that would've been a lot less messy and complicated, not to mention that the kid is now stuck between something that's not their responsibility to fix and now they're suffering through it."
"'Compromising' on big life decisions, it never ends well."
- ThanosWifeAkima-4848
Knowing When to Say Goodbye
"Not leaving or ending a relationship when it needs to be ended. Sometimes the best thing to do is to walk away."
- toosickto
That About Sums It Up
"Not 'dating' their partner after getting married and having kids."
"Not communicating."
"Not being on the same page when it comes to finances, household responsibilities, and boundaries with external family."
"Simply not prioritizing their partner."
- vtfb79
These responses came from people who clearly regretted decisions they'd made in relationships or been on the receiving end, neither of which likely felt very pleasant.
Countless emotions arise when going on a first date.
Making this all the more difficult is that a first date is one of the few things that absolutely must be done solo, so bringing friends as backup simply isn't an option.
Leaving one to wish there was a handbook for navigating a first date successfully.
Of course, while there is no official guide, everyone has rules and beliefs about what to do and what to avoid on a first date.
From how to effortlessly bring out your best qualities, to a foolproof escape plan if your date is anything but the one you've dreamed your whole life of meeting.
"What's an unspoken rule on a first date?"
EyeContact, And Not With Your Screen...
"Your phone is not part of the date."- Wonderful-Note9289
"Don't be on your phone the whole time."
"And don't talk about your ex."- HoW-LoNg-DoCtOR-YES
Think Very Carefully Before That Second Round
"Don’t drink too much."- drivethruhell
"Had a date like this."
"Within the first 90 minutes they had taken like three shots, and were on their third drink."
"I understand wanting to calm your nerves, but damn."
"The whole 'you need to play catch up LOL' isn't as cute as you think it is."
"We did not go on any other dates."- mothershipq
Drink GIFGiphyThere Is no Scent More Intoxicating Than Your Own...
"Have a shower beforehand."- Porriz
"And take it easy with the perfume/cologne."
Your date shouldn't smell you before they see you."- imnotlouise
No One Likes A Moocher...
"Don't order any extras plates to eat at home with your mom when the other is paying."- lil_wavey999
Always Be On The Same Page...
"Both should know it is a date."- mosquitohater2023
"I met a woman at an out of town festival through a friend of mine that she was hooking up with."
"She ended up taking too many shrooms and I spent an hour with her helping her to feel calmer."
"She is a traveling nurse and was going to be in my city in a few weeks so we exchange numbers and when she gets in town she asked if I want to get some sushi."
"Happy to make a new friend, we meet up, talk a lot about my friend that she’s hooking up with telling funny stories about him."
"Eventually it comes up that I’m leaving the next day for a 3 week trip to Europe with my girlfriend and she screams, 'I thought this was a f*cking date!'"
"Reeeeaaallly awkward."- redmoskeeto
Dating Wtf GIF by MaxGiphyBe Open And Transparent...
"Not a rule but never make the other person carry the conversation."
"You're both here to make an effort and give each other the respect."
"If you both want different things then let it be said after."
"No need to hurt someone's self-respect for your ego."- Arkjump
"Be there with honest intentions and nothing else."- S-Vagus
Or At Least Be Willing To Share
"Don’t order 3 full meals."- WinkMartindale
"AND expecting him to pay for all of it."
"I mean sure if you want to take some home for your mom, you pay for that yourself."- Widowhawk·
GiphyBe Prepared For A Lack Of Shared Interests...
"Leave the coin collection at home, wow her with that on the second date."- IronLion11·
Choose Your Activities Carefully
"Don't go to the movies or a fancy dinner on your first date if you don't already know this person."
"The movies is a place where you sit in silence for 2 hours staring straight ahead."
"That does not give you any opportunity to get to know the other person."
"A sit down dinner can be perfectly fine, but if you know within the first 10 minutes that you have no desire to spend any more time in this person's presence, you're stuck through the rest of the meal."
"First dates should always be intentionally short with an option to extend."
"Coffee, froyo, drinks, things that can turn into an hour of talking or 'would you like to grab a bite to eat?'"- baltinerdist
Get Your Emotions Under Control
"Don't excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and then accidentally think about your ex while in there, have to fight back tears, and then come back to the table after way too long, with puffy red eyes."
"Whoops." - Reddit
Sad That 70S Show GIF by LaffGiphyJust Be Open And Honest... To an Extent...
"Don't: Unload on your date about your trauma."
"Gotta keep that sh*t under wraps until at least date 5."
"Do: Be yourself, unless your whole personality teeters on your traumatic history--in that case, self-deprecating humor will suffice until you can successfully abandon all hope and sit in your car for an hour to cry afterward."-Deep-Essay-4829
A Conversation Is A Two-Way Street
"Usually when asked a question I’d answer it and then hit her with a 'what about you?'"
"To ensure that I wasn’t dominating the convo."
"Let the other person speak."- bumboclawt
... NOPE...
"Bring an egg, uncooked, in your pocket."
"Casually let it fall out at the end of the date."
"This establishes you as a breadwinner, who else has the money to just carry eggs around in their pockets?"
"When your date, inevitably, wants to know more about the egg just shrug it off."
"You're not here to brag, your egg does that for you."- wearywarrior
Broken Heart Love GIF by Share It AgainGiphyIf there is one rule absolutely everyone should follow when going on a first date, it's not being beholden to rules, spoken or unspoken.
After all, the best romances are often the ones which happen organically.
Love cannot be forced.
People Divulge Things Their Coworkers Have Done That Should've Gotten Them Fired But Didn't
My second college internship led me to a small content creation company. It was so small that the two editors were the only paid employees. Everyone else was an intern.
I was excited to start so I could add more to my portfolio only to realize that one of the editors replaced my name with hers every time she edited one of my articles. Not much of the content was changed, but I was too shy to question it.
I eventually found out that she did this to all the interns, and most of the interns had learned to private message their draft articles to the other editor, who did not take the bylines.
I asked one of my fellow interns if the founder of the company knew the editor took bylines. Turns out, the founder knew, but for some reason no one else could figure out, the editor never got fired.
It turns out this story isn't unique. There are lots of instances when someone does something at work that should get them fired, but they manage to hold on to their job. Redditors have plenty of stories like that and are eager to share.
It all started when Redditor Shelendrea asked:
"Have you ever witnessed something that should've gotten someone fired at work? If so, what happened?"
Needs More Than A Demotion
"Coworker jokingly threw a box at my chest and knocked the wind out of me and I collapsed. He begged me not to tell anyone and I didn't. The guy was a weirdo. He'd talk about how he'd burn insects and starts fires. Weird sh*t. He ended up getting in more trouble later on for some reason or another...crass jokes, sexual comments....either way, he eventually transferred stores and I never saw him again. This all happened back in 2013-14."
"Fast forward to earlier this year 2023, my store was getting a major remodel, and he was one of the managers that came from afar with a team of workers to do the remodel. I was surprised he was still with the company, let alone in a leadership position. I said hi to him a time or two, but he was busy with the remodel project on the other side of the store so I eventually stopped seeing him."
"This whole time things were tense between the remodel crew and our store crew. Pallet Jack's getting stolen, supplies going missing, etc. Both sides hated each other."
"I hadn't seen (we'll call him John) in a few weeks and noticed there was a new manager on the remodel crew. Either way, things were finally cooling down between us."
"Out of curiosity I asked one of the remodel crew what had happened to John, and they told me, "Oh you didn't hear? He got demoted for trying to start problems between our teams. He'd tell us to steal your pallet Jack's and tried getting a few people to fight.""
"Unreal."
– AdamR91
Got Milk?
"I worked in a milk factory. I was working with a man that was a bit off. We had to take the milk cartons on a conveyor belt and place them on a pallet. While we were working he said "time for a break" and slammed a blade used to open boxes into the conveyor belt. The conveyor belt got absolutely destroyed and the machine was in maintenance of two days after that."
– LyricalJerrycal
"Hey, when it's time for a break, it's time for a break."
– MyOpinyunIsRight
"How dairy?!"
– StrongestAvenger2211
Money, Money, Money
"The supervisor left the safe open."
"At this job, he should have absolutely gotten fired but his blunder got overshadowed because one of the douchier employees stole 50k and went on the run for over half a day."
– BW_Bird
"...doesn't that just highlight why the supervisor should keep the safe shut?"
– akaioi
"You'd think."
"Honestly, I wasn't too upset. Sups was a nice guy."
– BW_Bird
A DQ Thing
"When I was in high school, I worked at Dairy Queen. I was on the opening crew one Saturday and the assistant manager unlocks the doors, lets us in, and tells us "Guys, I'm really hungover right now so I'm gonna sleep in the back. Wake me up if you need me." She goes back and curls up on top of the laundry machines (we washed all the uniforms on site because they get covered in ice cream). It was a slow day so and she was the cool manager, so we all let her sleep and never told the owner."
"Another night, one of our cook's buddies parked their car in our lot and he just hung out there with them smoking weed for a couple hours. If someone ordered food, we'd go out and get him. He'd come back inside, cook it, and go right back out. The rest of us had the decency to smoke after work, but nobody ratted him out either."
– SeveralAngryBears
"Must be a Dairy Queen thing. When I was seventeen I was the grill cook at Dairy Queen and the employees had a pact with each other that if one of us came in after 4 pm when we weren’t working and made food and walked out with it, nobody would see the person doing it. We only had a shift leader, no managers after 4pm. So, my friends and I would smoke weed, drive to Dairy Queen, and I would walk back to the kitchen and cook a bunch of fried food and burgers, then take it out to my stoner friends waiting in the car. As you can imagine, I was pretty popular with my weed smoking friends."
– Horror-School-6713
Going, Going, Gone
"At my last job we had this guy who seemed normal, I knew he did some club drugs outside of work but I don’t have a problem with that. Anyways, he shows up to work one day COMPLETELY f*cking blasted. Like couldn’t walk right, couldn’t talk. This motherf*cker gets mad at me when I send him home, the next day I get to work and our boss is like "hey man what did you say to Tyler last night? He said you’re a huge a**hole and he’s never working with you again”. I told him and my boss goes “oh. Okay. Well I think he quit, he said if I don’t fire you he’s done here""
"Bold f*cking move to make after showing up in a k hole during your third week of work at our company lmfao"
– _clydebruckman
A New Kind Of Sneeze Burgers
"Was working at McDonald’s. Watched a female crew member sneeze into her hands, and proceed to make a wrap and sent it out. I threw it in the bin before front staff got it."
"Edit* I should mention - I was genuinely shocked to see it happen. McDonald’s are extremely strict on hygiene. I reported her to a manager, but she denied it and said she sneezed into her arm. We were too busy for anyone to check cameras."
– RewardNew5810
Nepotism At Its Finest
"Work in a residential setting for teens with behavioral issues. There’s 1 staff in particular who should not be working with kids and it was clear on my 2nd day. He’s almost 50 and behaves like a 15-year-old. He’s always going back and forth and gets mad about everything with them."
"One day, things got heated between him and a kid for the 100th time and he ends up choking the kid. The kid was actually being more mature about it and he wanted to continue to fight the kid. We separated them and I was holding the staff back when he started to get mad at me for not letting him beat up a 14 year old."
"I’ve only been at this job for 3 months and was told by other staff that this has happened multiple times now with different kids."
"He still has a job because he’s best friends with the 2 bosses."
– i-piss-excellence32
Wrong Accountability
"I worked at a special needs day program many years ago. Wednesdays were classic film day at the local theater and we’d take the clients. I was a 1:1 meaning I had only one client. My direct superior had 3, and a substitute had 4. The substitute lost one of her guys and didn’t realize it until after the film when we were counting clients."
"Long story short, I got fired & the superior got fired. But the one whose responsibility it was to watch him kept her job. The client was fine, though, he was found a mile down the road asking for a police officer to help him find his way home."
– iateacakeonce
It Is The Night Shift
"I work overnights at a hotel. They hired a guy to be the security/valet and in the first two weeks he was found sleeping on the job. The first time he was found by a third coworker. We told the manager and nothing happened. The second time the manager found him sleeping in the bell closet in a wheelchair. He got sent home but didn’t get fired."
– aolewahine808
"I'm overnight too, sometimes it feels like they just want a living body and don't care about much else."
"One of the guys I've had over the years would fall asleep constantly and sounded like he was drowning he snored so horribly, no consequence."
– wickedblight
Santa is Real!
"I worked at a small map company. Our first task when we started was to add rivers and lakes over satellite imagery/topographic maps. It was a summer job when I was in college. Both me and the guy who worked next to me were 19-20ish. It was very dry, repetitive, tedious work. We weren’t really allowed to talk while working so for the most part just plugged away at our own computer stations. Occasionally we would write notes to each other. Towards the end of the summer when he was about to go back to school my coworker went off the deep end. He just started drawing line art with the GIS software and naming them things. He drew Santa and his reindeer. Made up like half a dozen lakes with a bunch of whacky names like “Lake Milk Was a Poor Choice.” I didn’t tell anyone what he did and I wonder what the quality control people thought of it. He definitely would have been fired had they known."
– JMaple
Just One More Zero
"Yep."
"Few weeks ago one of my sales rep comes in to drop off paperwork for a sale he had just completed."
"The whole time he's bragging about how the customer couldn't believe his great deal even though he was paying MSRP."
"I take the paperwork, and start looking through it to verify the same amount to put the commission in for payroll."
"I come up on the price, and in the box it says: $2,100. I look at him in complete disbelief. I show him where he put the price, and his face went white as a ghost."
"$2,100 when it should've been $21,000. By misplacing the comma, and not adding an extra 0, the dumb S.O.B let a BRAND NEW UTV GO FOR $18.9K BELOW MSRP!!!!!!!"
"I had to tell the owner who told sales rep that 1% of the price would come out of all future paychecks until the price was paid back."
– amethyst_haired_emo
Yikes!
"I worked in a pizza restaurant from age 15 to 23. My answer is almost everything. Just a tip, when people say be kind to your servers, this is for your own benefit, not theirs."
– Silver-B-NotGold
I used to be a server. This is very true!