Men, we gotta do better. Check out these harrowing tales from women who were guilted into going out with a friend. It turned ugly - fast. We're not entitled to anything, and rejection is a part of life, so guys - do better.
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Oh wow yikes okay.Giphy
We were friends in high school and most of college. It was one of those things where he was a friend of a friend, but we always went to the same parties, hung together in the same group and so on.
The guys in the group would always say things like, "Ah man you and Kyle would be so great together! You should give him a shot!" I'd kind of laugh it off because for a majority of the time I had a boyfriend.
Eventually me and the boyfriend broke up, and about a week later Kyle asked me out. I wasn't really ready, but I figured it was a first date and everyone had been pressuring me into giving this guy a chance so I went.
The whole evening was awkward. We just ordered a pizza and watched movies, which was what we did in our friend group anyways, but this guy would NOT STOP STARING. I felt like I couldn't even eat because I was under a microscope. The evening ended uneventfully, but then there was the aftermath.
We kept texting and seeing each other in the friend group, and about a week later he asked when we can have another date. I told him that maybe I had rushed into things too fast and I just wasn't feeling any connection with him.
"I BROKE UP WITH MY GIRLFRIEND FOR YOU!"
Yup, dude found out I was single, dumped his girlfriend of 8 months just so he could ask me out to an awkward pizza date in his bedroom...
The timely cherry on top is that they got back together, and apparently I'm tearing their marriage apart because she found a bunch of texts from me from six years ago and he admitted that he kept them cause he still likes me. I haven't seen him in four years.
Edit for timeline: We were friends in high school (10 years ago) and college (5-6 years ago). While we are in college, he asks me out after dumping his girlfriend. Sometime after that they get back together and are married last year. Last week, a friend informs me that they are on the verge of divorce because she found texts he had saved (screenshots) from our college chats 5 or 6 years ago.
Edit: Several people are commenting that I shouldn't have gone out with him and just told him I wanted to stay friends... the thread is literally "girls guilted into going out with 'nice guy'"
This isn't a very sisterly thing to do.
Moved to another state with my sister and she made a few guy friends. One of them saw her with me and begged her to set up a date with me. I reluctantly agreed because she kept saying how sweet and nice he was. First date he kept gushing about how gorgeous I was and the fact that I was smart made it 100x better. He was going to make me his queen and take me around the world but I have to pay for my own meal and his since he paid this time.
I told him I was only interested in being friends and he begged my sister to get me to go out on another date. I declined and we moved back home and he came to visit my sister. While he was here he kept looking at me and telling my sister to just hook him up with me. It was my birthday and I kind of just rolled my eyes and was like come on I'll take you out too with my group of friends.
At the bar, he was really into me and I was getting annoyed because he wouldn't let me relax and have fun. I told him I really only saw him as a friend and in front of everyone he yelled at me saying what a horrible person I am for leading him on, nothing but a whore etc. I ended up crying because it was so embarrassing. My guy friends wanted to go "talk" to him after they heard what happened. My sister ran up to me and told me to go make him happy again he came down to see me and this is how I was treating him. I just went home and the next morning my sister told me how sorry that guy was and he wanted me to come say bye to him at the airport. Needless to say I didn't.
Trust your instincts.Giphy
Throwaway account for this as don't want my story tracing back to me. I met him through online dating and after a couple of weeks of chatting online decided to cool things off as he was giving off a creepy, needy vibe that frightened me. He would ask about ex boyfriends frequently and tell me that he would be good for me, ask sexual questions without any encouragement and want to know intimate details. I forgot all about him until he sent me a random message months later and apologized for his previous behavior which he blamed on a tricky break up.
Time passed and he seemed a new person so I gave in and met with him. Our first couple of dates seemed fine with just a few odd comments that I should have paid attention to. Then he started questioning where I was and who I was with, but again I just foolishly ignored this. The first time (and last time) I stayed at his we went out for a drink beforehand and he was judging me for having a couple of beers. When we got back to his I wasn't feeling up to anything sexual so told him firmly no and went to sleep. Later that night I woke up to him on top of me.
I never confronted him about this. I just pretended i hadn't woke up and made my excuses the next day before blocking him from by life. I've never told anyone this before. I just wish I'd listened to my previous instinct and kept well away.
Wasn't really a date. I was at a hiking trip with my sister and other people from our village when we met a group of guys, drinking and having fun. Was on (German) Father's Day, so it wasn't an unusual sight. For some reason my sister got into a talk with the guys and somehow got me and her invited for the party at one of the guys house later. No big deal, we brought her boyfriend with us and were expecting some good time. My boyfriend was on a biking trip with his dad, so he couldn't come.
We arrive and nobody else is there, guy says they will all arrive later and we are early (30 minutes after the time he told us to be there) and we start drinking, having fun and everything. He clearly has a thing for me, invites me to go on festivals with him, sisters boyfriend tells me I would be stupid if I say no and he would totally be going. The others arrive and at some point the homeowner asks me to go out for a walk, he needs some air.
We walk a bit and suddenly he turns around, telling me I am the love of his life, the girl meant for him, most beautiful, smart etc. he has ever seen. I was shocked and didn't know what to say except "I have a boyfriend, you know..", he said he doesn't care, we're clearly soulmates and then just kisses me out of nowhere. Tells me he would break up with his girlfriend for me (he never mentioned her before) and I should do the same.
Luckily, my sister blacked out on the toilet and someone shouted at him for help unlocking the door, so we went back up. I took care of my sister, his girlfriend arrived, he pulled me aside and told me he would do it now, right here. I said "no" and he told me to take my sister and leave, what I did then. He messaged me on facebook the next day that I was a whore and I lead him on and he almost broke up with his future wife for a b*tch like me.
Tl;dr: Met a guy, got invited to his house, he wanted me to break up with my boyfriend, he wanted to break up with his girlfriend, kissed me, called me soulmate and then a whore when I said no. All within 24 hours.
Edit: Since a lot of you asked "why would you let a stranger kiss you" or if I told my then-boyfriend about it... we did not make out and did not kiss him back. He smooched my lips after he approached me in the middle of a sentence at high-speed and let go of me seconds later before I could even process what had happened.
I CAN take care of myself and would have given him a good kicking, but I honestly was worried about my sister, even though I used the word "luckily". At least I could make you laugh about that.
Well, this is scary.
All my friends said a guy from our group of friends was very nice, even though I felt like he was creepy. Went out once, thought I'd give it a chance, to be nice. Regretted it immediately.
He asked me what I thought of being in a relationship with him, and when I said no/I didn't want that (because I wasn't very interested and we had only been friends before this), he said he was disappointed with my answer and expected something more worthy of him. He said that saying no was disrespectful. Big yikes.
We met once after that because he surprise visited me a few months later. He asked me to ruffle through my hair because he wanted to feel my scalp, treated me like a dog and wanted me to sit next to him so he'd be closer to me. He also thought it was a great idea to mention that he sometimes hears voices in his head and has dreamt of killing people.
I rushed him out of my apartment onto the street. I just wanted him to be gone. I checked my keys five times to see whether he took any. I've had to see him a couple times since then, and he is the most creepy, socially inept person I've ever met. He's so aggressive and impulsive.
edit: this blew up. Yes, he still is in my circle of friends. For some reason my guy friends laughed it off and don't see him as much of a threat to anyone, let alone me. I avoid him as much as I can, and never see him in groups of less than five people.
There's a word for this - misogyny.Giphy
He was genuinely nice and I thought I was being too picky and maybe I could see this through, if I took the effort of getting to know him. But every time I offered a contradictory point of view on any generic topic of discussion, he would proceed to casually mock my appearance, attire and my personality, in retaliation to my disagreement. That was the last date, obviously.
Edit: He might not have been "genuinely nice."
Hence the quotes around "nice."
I was a college freshman. First week of school, I was in my dorm hangout area going through the calendar on my phone to add exams to my schedule. I didn't realize that "Nice Guy" was looking over my shoulder as I was doing so.
He goes, "I see you don't have plans on Saturday, we're going to breakfast." - I continually objected and said I just hadn't gotten around to adding anything to it yet. He wouldn't leave me alone about it all week, so eventually I agreed to go on Saturday. I was purposely on my worst behavior in an attempt to repulse him because clearly, my opinion didn't matter otherwise. He ended the date by calling his mom, telling her that he met his future bride, that we were going to give her grandchildren.
He handed the phone to me, so I straight up told his mother that I had no interest and was only there because he wouldn't leave me be and apparently acting like a barnyard animal wasn't enough of a turnoff. Mom laughed and said "sounds like my boy!"
He would sit on the couch outside my dorm door to bombard me whenever I tried to go anywhere, followed me to and from classes for two months, and tried to befriend my roommate to get closer to me before moving on to a new target. She ended up with a restraining order against him.
Edit for clarification: This was not my first interaction with this guy. He lived in my (small) dorm building where we did multiple getting to know you exercises that week. He helped a ton of people move in and was a self proclaimed "nice guy" like the title had in quotes. Most people's first impression of him was that he was nice enough, but a little off. I clearly completely agree that dude was creepy af, I just posted in a hurry and left out some background. Edit edit: since "nice guy" was in quotes in the OP, I thought it was clear that we weren't dealing wit actual nice guys, hence why I thought my story was relevant. If it were asking a story about going on a date with an actual nice person, I don't think it would be an interesting AskReddit question?
I'll take male entitlement for $100, Alex.
The date wasn't too bad, although he kept changing pretty much every single sentence he said so it would fit my interest. Something like "I like ice cream" "Cool, I like frozen yoghurt" "oh yeah, that's what I meant. Ice cream is nice but frozen yoghurt is amazing" and so on for 4 hours straight. At the end I had no idea what he was actually like.
He also kissed me in the most awkward way possible. I guess he thought it was going to be romantic and spontaneous but it wasn't. Then kissed me again when he walked me to the train station. He hugged me so hard I couldn't breath and started making weird noises (kind of like what some people do during heavy, pre sex make out sessions, except it was a rather quick kiss in a public place). Started texting me before I even got home and when I didn't answer, got upset. Told him he was nice but I don't think we'd work out. Said its cool, asked if we can stay friends. Silly me, I said yes.
We kept talking for about a month, during which he very "friendly" kept checking if I had slept with someone else and making sure I know how much of a sex god he is ("you know, I once even made my lesbian friend cum super hard"). This is also the time I met my current BF and was meeting a bunch of new people at uni, so we'd talk less and less each week. Then one day he asked me out. I said I wasn't sure if he was completely fine with us being just friends so that wouldn't be appropriate. He went on this massive rant about how he'd actually been seeing someone else in that time, but they broke up shortly before that, how he's so over me and didn't even think I'm that hot anymore and how nothing would happen. I said no, because I was broke and couldn't fully enjoy myself while worrying about not spending too much (we were supposed to go to a Metallica concert, apparently his best friend had spent £120 on his ticket but then last minute found something better to do...) but he promised he'd take care of everything and we could chill at his place with pizza and some films, as friends.
I said I could consider the concert but there's no way I'd stay over. I mentioned texting someone else to see if they would be fine with me sleeping over at theirs afterwards. He jokingly asked if it's someone I'm sleeping with and I said it's none of his business. Then he told me how much of a bitch I was for sleeping with other people and not sleeping with him, said it's so unfair that he knew me so much better but he felt like other people had more rights to me than him and that we kissed and he didn't expect me to be this slutty (btw, I did not want to kiss him, it was just so random I felt him making out with me before I even realized what his intentions were and stopped it rather quickly). The he called me a few more names, said he's such a nice guy and didn't deserve to be treated like that and we never spoke again. Fun times
Nice? No. Weird? Very.Giphy
I dated the 'nice guy' everyone was convinced is a catch, for a few weeks. I can't fit an adequate description of the experience in one post. If I had to pick a few salient moments, they might be:
• He compared me to his ex-girlfriend frequently. "She smelled amazing. Like lavender. You don't smell like lavender." "She got into Oxford. You could never get into Oxford."
• He was a PhD student, and I was an undergrad at the time. "Undergrads are so mentally disabled. ...Not you though, you're special."
• When he wanted to have sex, then insisted I have the morning after pill the next day. I agreed on the condition he paid for it, because I was broke. We walked to the pharmacy, and he slows down and lingers outside. He sort of...circles the block. I am confused. Then I realize he doesn't want to enter the pharmacy with a girl, requesting the morning after pill. I state he can just give me cash, and I'll do it. He decides to enter the pharmacy. The pharmacist asks if we need help, and he quickly replies, "We're just browsing." It takes him a good fifteen minutes to get around to it. The pharmacist is very professional the entire time. When we reach the counter, he looks at me expectantly. I realize he now wants me to pay. I physically don't have the cash, so I just shrug and leave. He finally pulls out a bunch of credit cards.
• He sold me a broken second-hand laptop. Months after we broke up, I realized he hadn't logged out of Facebook. Being a terrible person, I read the messages he exchanged with his best friend. Many of the girls in his laboratory oscillated between "sluts" or "frigid c*nts", his supervisor was a "downy." and he'd written many remarks about his other colleagues and housemates. I also found out he'd been visiting my profile regularly, and commenting on all my activities and new boyfriend (we've been together six years now!). I promptly deleted him and made my account private.
I don't understand my gender.
After a few years of tepid friendship (something was always a bit 'off' about him, but I thought he was such a nice guy and I was just being a judgy bitch, plus he always claimed to be so in love with me), I agreed to a few dates with my friend. On one date, we went out with a whole group of couples to this state park a few hours away, and during the ride home, I dozed off. I woke up to him groping me under my clothes, and when I told him off, he twisted it around like I was being ridiculous and imagined his hand under my bra. Like, we're on a date, why was I being so weird, etc etc etc.
When I told him I had to cancel out 4th date because I'd gotten grounded after accidentally setting the kitchen on fire, he punched me. Mostly in the face. Punched me.
He spent the rest of high school periodically stalking me/my sisters, ranting and raving to literally everyone about how I just didn't understand and he loooooooves me, he's just so emotional with his true love for me that sometimes he acts without thinking, he's not like those other guys that would make sexual comments about my appearance, why did I have to be such a Stacey, he's the best friend I ever had until I ruined it all by willfully "misunderstanding" and refusing to hear him out or give him closure, on and on.
What a nice guy. Guess he tried to break into my bedroom window out of love and concern, huh?
There is so much to learn in life.
And once you acquire certain things mentally, you regret it.
How much 411 have you come across over time that made you think... "How can I unlearn that?"
Yeah, not possible.
Knowledge is power and sometimes it's a nightmare.
Don't we have enough to keep us up at night?
Well let's do some learning.
Redditor RedBoyFromNewy wanted to shed some light on creepy issues we need to be discussing. They asked:
"What’s a disturbing fact that not a lot of people know of?"
So who is ready to spill, and where do you find the info?
From the GutsBasketball Wives Ugh GIF by VH1Giphy
"Without mucus your stomach would digest itself."
"The reason you body produces more saliva before vomiting is your bodies way if protecting your mouth from the acidity of the vomit before you actually throw up."
"There are more suicides than homicides in the US every year."
"60% of all gun deaths in fact are suicides. It is estimated that someone offs themselves with a firearm every 20 minutes in the US. And 80% of them are males."
"And what's worse (knowing, as my family just went through this.)... 70% of suicides have no note. It's a common misconception that most people leave a note and it just isn't true. Mainly because a lot of people who write notes realize they don't want to go through with it. Those who are 'successful' just do it."
"You can give still 'birth' if you die while pregnant. The decomp process will force the baby out. It’s rare but it does happen."
"This is usually what ends up happening when a pregnant woman gets murdered. They usually find the fetus either completely separate (like in the Lacy and Connor Peterson case) or in the same location as the mother, but clearly birthed (like with the case with Shanann Watts). It's something I never knew happened until very recently and I think it's one of the most horrifying aspects of death."
"The deadliest ship disaster was the MV Wilhelm Gustloff, a ship built during the Nazi Regime. In January 1945, she was evacuating 10,000 German citizens ahead of the soviet Invasion when (albeit ironically) a Soviet Submarine spotted them, and fired three torpedoes. The ship was on the freezing cold Baltic Sea, and the davits (ropes) for the lifeboats had frozen over."
"Not only that, but the ship was only meant to carry 2,000 people normally. These two factors, coupled with the harsh angle the ship was sinking at, meant only half of the lifeboats could be deployed. 9,400 people drowned to death that night, and nobody knows about it."
I See YouKung Fu Wtf GIF by A24Giphy
"Your eyes have a separate immune system than the rest of your body, and if your normal immune system ever learns about your eyes, it will target them and you'll go blind."
Oh my eye. How do we protect them? As if I don't have enough stress.
LaunchedStanley Cup Nhl GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphy
"Penguins can launch their poop out of their butts like 5-6m far."
"Cotard's delusion, also known as walking corpse syndrome, is a neuropsychiatric disorder in which the person is in eternal damnation. They literally believe they are dead or dying [or don't have organs], the amount of despair is unimaginable and simply can't be grasped by people not suffering from it."
"It may seem like we know a lot about the human brain, but our standard way of studying brain activity is an fMRI, where a single pixel contains over 3 million neurons. That is more than many vertebrate animals' entire brains. The truth is, we really have no idea how the brain gives rise to consciousness."
"Edit: Even if we somehow perfectly worked out all the neural correlates of consciousness so we could say a mental state happens if and only if some exact pattern of brain activity happens, we would still have the 'hard problem' of consciousness: Why do these physical processes give rise to raw subjective experience, rather than just happening 'in the dark?'"
"If your esophagus closes and you cannot swallow, you have about 2 minutes before saliva starts reaching your windpipe. It is not a long time, but it is long enough to panic..."
"I have Eosiniphillic Oesophagitis and have had food stuck in the oesophagus for up to 24 hours before. And it’s horrible. You don’t realise how much saliva you swallow, to be constantly choking and vomiting that back up isn’t the best experience!"
Get LuckyPrayer GIFGiphy
"You’ve probably been closer to dying multiple times in your life then you even know. Just got lucky, or unlucky depending on who you are."
Well that's enough to disrupt sleep for life. Thanks y'all.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
The best stories are ones with exciting plot twists.
But the next best type of stories are the ones that continue spiraling out of control.
Curious to hear examples of this, Redditor _Mitnix_ asked:
"What's your best 'oh you thought this was bad, it gets worse' story?"
It's story time. You may want to buckle up.
It All Started With A Cat
"This is a long one, but I promise it's worth it:"
"A buddy of mine was cat-sitting for a friend of his while the guy was out of town on a vacation. My buddy didn't have a car, so the dude told him that if he needed to go out and pick up more cat food or anything, he could borrow the car."
"At the time, my buddy was living right down the street from this guy, staying at his parents' house. So my buddy was just going over for a few hours each day to feed the cat and keep it company, then going back home."
"Meanwhile, he's also been flirting with this woman online. She lives several states away, but he feels like they seem to be getting pretty serious. So he decides to take some liberties, really push the envelope on where he'll pick up cat food from, and he takes his friend's car on a little multi-state road trip."
"This is insane, right? Just atrociously bad judgement, especially since someone does need to feed the cat. To solve this, he left his parents a note. It read, 'I am camping in the woods behind our house. Please go over to ____'s and feed his cat. I'll let you know when I'm home.'"
"Boom. Problem solved, right?"
"Except that the 'woods behind our house' are about 20 yards deep. It takes less than five minutes to walk through them and come out into the neighboring housing development. So his parents went looking for him, calling out for him, and couldn't find him. They got worried and contacted a family friend, a local police officer. He subsequently got a hold of the fire department. There was a full-on search party combing through about 1/50th of an acre of woods. Unsurprisingly, they were coming up with nothing."
"This was before cell phones were common, so my buddy was completely unaware that his plan had fallen apart. He was cruising along on his 12-hour drive, expecting to get to this girl's house just in time for dinner. Except he didn't have a GPS. So he got lost. Very lost. Like, by the time he turned up at this woman's house, it was almost midnight."
"When he got there, she was crying her eyes out. He assured her that it was okay, he was fine, wasn't hurt or in a wreck or anything, he'd just gotten lost. And she said, 'No, no, I wasn't worried about you. My dad just died in a motorcycle accident.'"
"So he bailed on his cat-sitting duties, stole a car, and inspired his parents to file a missing-persons just so he could awkwardly watch a woman cry for a few hours and then drive back home."
The Beekeeper's Nightmare
"I will try to keep it short. I am a beekeeper. My 3rd year of beekeeping, I suddenly developed a severe allergy to bee stings. It was spring and I was installing bees for the beginning of the season. I was up to the last hive, went to install that package of bees and one stung me right in the top of my head."
"I finished up a few minutes after and went up toward the house to do some other things. I started feeling flush and I could feel my heart racing. After I few minutes I realized I was having an anaphylactic reaction."
"If you’ve never had one, aside from the physical symptoms, they also say you will get a feeling of impending doom. That was spot on. I absolutely felt I was going to die and people do die from these reactions."
"So I am now in the house and desperately searching for Benadryl of which I have none. I am also having trouble breathing, my body is going haywire and I feel like I’m going to black out shortly."
"I call my mom, who lives an hour away, to call 911 because I feel like I will be unconscious soon. She says okay, phone rings 30 seconds later. It’s my mom, she goes 'I called 911 but they said you have to call'. This was my first wtf."
"So I call and it’s a very typical 911 call she is trying to keep me talking and I essentially started vomiting and she is still on the line and I am waiting and waiting for this alleged ambulance."
"A full half hour goes by. At this point I am actually coming out of the reaction. So I go to sit at my kitchen counter. I’m still on the line with the 911 dispatcher. I see the ambulance pull up and I say, oh they’re here. She’s like great, are you okay? I’m like yes and then she says goodbye and hangs up."
"I see the EMTs outside but my driveway has a gate so they are just standing there and they ring the bell on my gate and I am just looking at them, dumbfounded. Like I called for an emergency over a half hour ago, and they’re gonna roll up here and ring my bell and wait for me to come out when I more than likely could be unconscious or dead on the floor."
"I literally had to go out and let them in. Then they basically talked me in to going to the hospital to get checked out. Another huge mistake because this took place in the 2 months in my entire life when I didn’t have health insurance. So I ended up paying $4000 for a late ambulance and some IV Benadryl and epinephrine."
"Oh which also reminds me, a paramedic also showed, put the IV in when I agreed to go to the hospital. Then I felt something dripping and turns out he put it in my artery rather than a vein and it was just pushing the fluid out of the IV."
"0/10 would not go through any of that again…but I did 10 years later when I had another anaphylactic reaction due to a bee sting. However this went a lot smoother and I had epi-pens and a responsive ambulance."
"Arrive home from work, my house reeks of oil."
"Go in the basement, and there's a pool of oil, with my stuff floating in it. The oil filter on my burner rotted out (it was defective and recalled, but the tech never bothered to notify me or replace it). Call up the tech, he throws a new one, charges me the emergency call fee, and advises I call HO insurance before running away (it was his fault, I didn't know it yet)."
"This was February in NY, about 13F out, and obviously the burner wasn't on while sitting in a pool of oil. But, they get there pretty quickly soak it up, and get things running so my pipes don't freeze."
"Only way to get the smell out is to dry clean everything I own, then shampoo all the carpets, run deodorizers, etc. Takes weeks. Had a headache the whole time."
"Turns out, my basement has cracks, most of it leaked through. They had to cut out my foundation and dig out the contaminated soil."
"Oil in soil means DEC gets involved. Whole new can of worms as they now had to monitor the process, test at every step. Big enough deal I have a spill number in their database."
"A 20 yard dumpster, with 20 yards of oil soaked sand, is so heavy that it broke through my driveway, destroying it. They did that twice, took out my entire driveway."
"Remember how I said this was in February? March brought the COVID shutdown."
"I spent over a year with my basement in shambles, holes in my driveway, plastic sheets taped up, no washer/dryer, and all sorts of equipment kicking around."
"The next spring, they're back and working, and screwed everything up. Not going to get into every detail, but after a big fight, I managed to get rid of them and bring in a new company to fix their screwups and finish the job. Old crew got very difficult when the new crew requested permits and reports. Turns out, they never bothered. Had to do all that before they could start working again."
"New company dropped a storage crate on my yard to store my stuff while working, destroyed my grass, took out a sprinkler, took out my neighbor's driveway curb, got concrete all over my brickwork, but at least the nightmare was finally over."
These Redditors have been dealt with some major blows.
People who say that things will always get better, are partially right. Things do come around, eventually.
But you never know how many curve balls life has to throw at you until there's a resolution.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Life is full of disappointments. We lose out on a job opportunity or the one designer article of clothing we really wanted is not available in our size.
But we go on.
But the biggest letdowns are the ones we never see coming but must contend with.
Redditor Frequent-Pilot5243 asked:
"What is a depressing truth you have made peace with?"
No matter how much you prize a friendship, not all of them are for forever.
Here Today, Gone Tomorrow
"A friendship you thought would last forever can end in an instant."
The Best Mate Who Quit
"My best mate of 20 years, said that he didn’t want to be my best man and just said he didn’t want to be my friend any more. Hurt like hell."
It's Okay To Let Go
"Sometimes people you care deeply about will choose to drop out of your life and all you can really do is have the grace to let them."
"edit. to everyone struggling with being left behind, and to everyone struggling with having to be the one to leave- I hope the pain eases for you soon."
Restarting The Process
"I have a really hard time with this one. Every friendship I've had in my adult life has only lasted a couple years tops. Rarely a falling out or anything, but just drifting apart or sh*t happens type deal. It's hard for me to make friends in the first place because I'm pretty shy, so having to regularly restart that process is really discouraging. Right now I don't really have any friends because I've just kinda given up trying."
The harsh reality of losing the people we love hits home for these Redditors.
"My grandpa just wanted to get to know me and the man I was becoming during his last year of life. Which I was too young and too selfish to realize."
"Yeah, this hits home. I spent 90% of my childhood with my grandparents. I was at their house almost everyday. When I got into my teens and obviously found friends, discovered women, all that stuff and then I just stopped seeing them. They’re both gone now and they died with the memories of me as a child. Although they seen me sometimes while I was older, they didn’t know me because I didn’t give them the chance."
"My dad passed away 6 weeks ago and I will NEVER see, hear, chat or get to hug him ever again & that forever is a long time."
These sobering facts were huge disappointments.
Truth About CPR
"This is coming from a firefighter:"
"If you have to perform CPR on them, it's most likely over for the patient."
"I'm not sure if I've made peace with it completely, but I've accepted it at least."
The After Effects
"I've taken CPR training twice in the past 10 years. The instructors were so completely different... The second one flat out told us 'you're giving them about a 15% chance of living, and even if they live, they will probably have some kind of severe trauma that will dramatically decrease their quality of life.' Wow..."
Despite Having Good Intentions...
"No one is coming to help."
That Train Has Left The Station
"I'm aging nonstop."
Innocence Is Gone
"My childhood is gone, and I have no good memory from that phase of my life."
No matter what, life goes on with or without us.
The best that any of us can do while we're passengers on this giant spaceship is to take life as it comes and pick up the pieces the best we can when things don't pan out as we'd hoped.
Sometimes, it's about celebrating the small victories–like finally finding a store that has your shoe size.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
The truth matters.
Something one would think was a given in modern society.
Yet all over the world, there are people so unbelievably stubborn, that they simply refuse to believe the facts.
Sometimes even when presented with evidence.
This could be for something menial, such as refusing to believe that a cotton candy was actually invented by a dentist.
But sometimes, refusing to believe the truth could have serious consequences, up to and including climate change, the effectiveness of masks, and the disproportionate amount of gun violence in the US.
Redditor Lady_Of_The_Water was curious about the many things, both frivolous and serious, people refused to believe were true, leading them to ask:
"Whats something someone thought you were wrong about and ridiculed you for it, but it turns out you were right?"
What's that smell?
"That there really was a gas leak in the apartment building."
"Thankfully, the fire didn't cause much damage."- yamsnavas2.
There's a reason the bill is so high.
"Our water usage at work went up a lot."
"They checked all the toilets, sinks for leaks, couldn't find anything."
"I mentioned that it seemed to coincide with the new water cooler system installation, maybe that should be checked."
"They basically laughed at me."
"That stupid water system never worked good and the guy came in 3 different times and said it was just the filter."
"Every month it needs changed???"
"Didn't seem right."
"Finally a different technician came in and result was it was never installed correctly."
"I asked, 'could that have anything to do with the increased water usage that started when this got installed?'"
" He smiled 'I wondered if anyone caught that, yes the valve was not correct and water has been running'."
"For 5 months!!"
"If only they had listened."
"Total redemption!"- McTee967.Nbc Jump GIF by SuperstoreGiphy
Have you ever looked at a map?
"I had a coworker doubling down repeatedly, claiming that new Zealand is north of Australia."
"I even told her about how I had lived there and she just assumed I was such a huge idiot that I didn't know where on the globe I was living."
"Brought the smartphone out and put an end to that."
"Let me just say, it's ok to not know where all the countries are."
"The problem is if you heavily assert you are right and others are stupid."- PlopPlopPlopsy.
Is it supposed to hurt this much?
"My husband told me that I was a 'baby' about my IUD insertion and insisted that it wasn't painful."
"That my concerns about entrusting a stranger to shove a foreign object into my body were paranoid."
"I listened to him because really, the info you'd find online is overwhelmingly positive."
"Long story short: the provider placed it wrong, didn't check/fix it when I asked her to."
"I spent 4 years in pain that I eventually 'got used to."
"It expelled half way out my cervix, had to get it yanked out at the ER."
"That's when I was told that copper IUDs are notorious for breaking inside the uterus."
"Because it broke inside me."
"The cherry on top?"
"The female gyno with three kids I saw to get the broken piece removed told me that 'cervixes don't really feel pain' and that I didn't really need to remove it."
"Goes without saying, I was in severe pain for 2 weeks straight before this appointment."
"Tons of women came out with their stories about lawsuits over IUDs, how they got pregnant with an IUD."
" Stories similar to mine."
"And how women should really be offered anesthesia or pain pills for this procedure."
"And when my husband was surprised to learn about the pain I endured I reminded him 'You called me a baby and everyone else told me it was all in my head'."
"Which is why I didn't talk about it."- PopK0rnAndMMs.
Seems like you could learn something from me.
"In sixth grade chemistry a teacher asked us what element was a gas that was lighter than air, and extremely flammable/explosive."
"I grew up on science because of what my dad does for a living and Bill Nye."
"I knew about the Hindenburg, and so I was really proud of myself when I raised my hand and said 'Hydrogen'."
"The teacher laughed at me and said that no, it was Helium, and the entire rest of the class proceeded to laugh too."
"Almost three decades later I work in a lab now, and f*ck that teacher I was right."- vanyel_ashke.Season 8 Teacher GIF by FriendsGiphy
The dictionary is your friend.
"I have worked as a translator and a proofreader."
"For one of my translations, it went something like 'and he piqued her interest'."
"My proofreader docked me for an inaccuracy and switched it to 'and he peaked her interest'.”
"I’m still salty."
"I tried to get the agency I was working for to remove this person as a proofreader since I question his/her command of the English language."
"Had a similar problem with the phrase “lynch pin” used metaphorically."
"I stopped working with that agency because it pissed me off so much being 'corrected' incorrectly."- spot_o_tea.spelling GIFGiphy
No, that's just an illusion.
"When I told my mom that the clouds were moving and she laughed like I was crazy."-
Did you even read the menu?
"I was in the passenger's seat at a Carl's Jr Drive Thru with a friend."
"He asked what I wanted and I requested the Fried Zucchini."
"He puts half his body through the window to the voice box and goes on this 'My friend here thinks you have some kind of food I know you don't have so I am just going to say it for laughs because you will get a kick out of this'."
"She wants FRIED ZUCCHINI' and starts laughing."
" Well guess who ends up eating fried zucchini."- User Deleted.
And how do you spell that?
"Believe it or not, the pronunciation of my own middle name."- ThePlantie.
We have standards in this community...
"Not me but my Mom tells a story about how she wrote a paper for school about how tough her small town makes it for any new people moving in."
"Basically if you didn't grow up there you were a social outcast for decades and were excluded from a lot of things."
"The teacher didn't agree so she got a bad grade and scoffed at."
"A few years later a news paper reporter essentially wrote the same thing and won a local award for calling out the same small town BS that was going on."- Jberg18.
It's pretty amazing that anyone in this day and age would jump to tell someone they're wrong without having any authority.
Particularly when someone can quickly look up the truth on their phone in less than a minute.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.