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People Explain Which Gestures May Be Friendly In One Country But Offensive In Another

People Explain Which Gestures May Be Friendly In One Country But Offensive In Another
Image by Lorri Lang from Pixabay

If one is going to travel, one really should do a little research about the destinations and cultures one is going to visit. You may be offending people when you're trying to be nice.

And then you have a very little amount of time to fix an offensive situation. We all do it of course. It's near impossible to learn everything about every place and culture. But Google does allow us a quick deep dive.

Redditoru/HeWhoMustBeGaywanted to shed light on other cultures and adventures that more of us should have more knowledge about, especially if we travel, by asking:

What's a friendly gesture in one country but a big no-no in another?

When I was in London I learned that whether you can do a great British accent or not... don't. They've seen and heard enough of it. You're not Bridget Jones. Just enjoy the sights.

Fingered

Vhs Kiss GIF by vhspositiveGiphy

"Thumbs up means ok in America but in Iran it has the same effect as the middle finger."

- Curry12734

No Touching

"In Brazil we are very pro-hugs even with strangers depending on the situation. Like tight hugs. We have no problems about touching as in the shoulder or arm while talking, or side hugging to take pictures with strangers. We also have the kissing thing (not between men tho). We share our life's story and feelings with strangers pretty easily. Waiting-in-a-line-together micro friendships are a thing. There are many cultures where this level of touching and sharing would be considered incredibly weird."

- tdeinha

Greetings...

"In the west a lot of people when greeting kids, put their hand in the kids head, ruffling up their hair or something like that. In Thailand the majority of the country is Buddhist and follows the beliefs so some extent. The head is held as a sacred and cleanest part of the body, even if its a kid so this practice is considered very offensive."

"Luckily the Thais are a very understanding and forgiving people and would happily accept an apology for this oversight and would only hold a grudge if it came from someone who they know to be aware of this. Another thing that we in the west might do without thinking is step across someone in you needed to get past."

"For example if people were sat on the floor around a fire, or a low table, maybe just chilling on the grass with friends in the park or at a festival. If you needed to get past someone you may step over their body to some degree, maybe stepping over their legs or something innocuous to us."

"Just as the head is held in high regard, the feet are the opposite, believed to be dirty and it is very disrespectful to point your feet at someone, step over any part of their body etc.. A simple excuse me (koh toad khap), with a gesture in the direction you wish to pass will result in the person happily moving out of your way and appreciating your respect of their cultural beliefs."

- fifadex

"Are you Canadian?"

"Took a trip to Australia last summer, and I'm from the US. When people heard my accent they would ask, "Are you Canadian?" and after having replied no to several people, I asked why they never asked if I was from the states. Apparently Canadians are insulted if you ask them if they are American, so it's just custom to ask everyone if they are Canadian first."

- Lost_Ad_8970

Tips

Giphy

"Although tipping is obligatory in the US, but I also heard that in some countries like Japan and China tipping often makes them feel inferior."

- Qrainix_

Now that is a lot of new information. Look how easy it is to step in. And the bigger the step, the bigger the fix. I still say in this day and age, the less touching the better though. No offense...

Listen Close

Listen GIF by The Maury ShowGiphy

"German 'tschüss' (goodbye) apparently sounds like 'Qù sǐ' (去死) to Chinese tourists, meaning 'go to death'."

- NoGravitasForSure

And I mean STARE...

"I had a Chinese neighbor who would stare at me. And I mean STARE. There was one time when he was in his front yard and I was getting in my car. I decided to stare back. We just stared at each other for a good 20 seconds. I lost the staring contest because it was agonizingly awkward."

"I researched Chinese customs and found out that they apparently stare a lot and I guess it's not really "friendly," but it's just a normal thing in China. In the US, staring is considered extremely strange and rude. He didn't speak English, so I couldn't even tell him that he was making me and my wife uncomfortable with his constant death stare."

- New_Example7867

American Principal...

"Not necessarily rude but still weird/surprising. In India when you meet someone who is your elder (like significantly older) you touch their feet as a gesture that you are asking for their blessings and showing respect towards them. I think there is a video of an Indian Student who touched the feet of his American Principal on his graduation and left him confused."

- Radiant_Ad5640

Let's Chat

"In America, people talk to strangers on regular basis, do small talk, ask how the other person is doing, etc. in my country if you ask a stranger how is he doing it will be really weird and awkward for the person. You don´t even smile or talk in general to strangers in my country."

- Ellenixie

Cook & Clean

"My sister in law recently came to stay with me while my husband was out of town. Apparently in my husbands culture it is a sign of gratitude for guests to help clean around the house and help with cooking. Meanwhile in my American culture having a guest over means busting my butt to clean the house to the point of being spotless and making sure there is a ton of snacks and food available before the guest gets there. First morning she got up like an hour before me and swept the whole house and even brushed the cat hair off the cat tree."

"She also would not let me help cook dinner lol. It made me uncomfortable at first and I tried to tell her that she didn't need to do all that (nicely not in a rude way), but she was very insistent on wanting to help out so I just let her. Apparently it was making her uncomfortable sitting around while she was here lol. Definitely a conflict of cultural norms there lol."

- Eened

Say Nothing

season 1 episode 102 GIF by BBCGiphy

"I read once that in some cultures, if you're a guest in someone's home, it would be bad form to compliment a household item or decoration, because they will then be obligated to offer it to you as a gift. I can't remember which countries they cited where this was a thing."

- ashfordbelle

On a side note, when in Amsterdam, don't overdo it with the weed. They really can't stand that. Act accordingly.

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People's Weirdest Hospital Waiting Room Experiences

Reddit user /IAmAsianHearMeRoar asked: 'What did you see happen in the hospital waiting room?'

hospital waiting area
Martha Dominguez de Gouveia on Unsplash

When we're in pain or scared, we're not on our best behavior.

We've got more important things on our minds than proper etiquette.

Couple our lowered inhibitions with the bizarre amalgam that is the human body and weirdness is bound to happen in hospital waiting rooms.

Keep reading...Show less

No matter how good it might be, no relationship is 100% perfect 100% of the time.

On the contrary, there are some relationships that seem pretty doomed to fail, and it's disheartening how many signs we can spot of the relationship coming apart, perhaps even before the couple themselves is aware of it.

But as clear as a sign of trouble might be, it can feel impossible to talk to a loved one about it when it's about their relationship.

Redditor AnitaDeckenme123 asked:

"What are some signs that your married friend doesn't have a good marriage?"

All Joking Aside

"Talking s**t about their spouse, even if it’s in a joking way, is a clear sign to me. I went to a bachelor party with a bunch of guys I didn’t know and they spent the entire time b***hing about their wives, and they all sounded miserable."

- FunctionBuilt

Desperate to Hide the Truth

"They are withdrawn or secretive. If your friend is suddenly withdrawn or secretive, it may be a sign that they are having problems in their marriage."

- LiaRipsx

Weird Gestures to "Mark Their Territory"

"His hang glider now has a full-sized graphic of his spouse holding the cat on it. And he wasn't asked beforehand."

- BarcodeNinja

Hypothetical Divorces

"They talk about divorce hypothetically."

- LaximumEffort

"Okay, but what if, say, I am watching a lot of true crime murder shows, and he tells me we can just get a divorce instead of me killing him? Does that count? Lol (laughing out loud)."

- HopefulKitty

Detached Relationship

"When they don’t care what the other person is doing or where they are. Basically, two people who live separate lives and live like roommates."

- Lucyinthesky

"My friend never says anything bad about her husband, but she also doesn't speak about him much at all. They’ve been married less than a year, but she's said things like not caring what he's up to a couple of times, and it made me wonder if that was normal in marriage. It feels wrong."

- happinessinasong88

Fighting in Public

"I’ve known two different couples that off and on fought a lot around me at certain points, which isn’t obviously a great sign."

"The fighting stopped, but what I realized after a while that may be worse is that they didn’t interact at all unless absolutely necessary."

"I’m mostly oblivious, so it took my wife pointing it out to notice that both of these couples never really talk to each other besides mandatory stuff like plans or the kids."

"No casual conversations, no eye contact, no touching each other; literally no interaction that’s not necessary for the family to function."

"I suppose it’s better than fighting in public, but it’s kind of weird once you notice it."

- non_clever_username

Social Media Cover Stories

"If they're plastering social media with how HAPPY they are, and they're SO IN LOVE, and THEY'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER, that's a sure sign that things are in the process of going sideways."

- wilderlowerwolves

"This confuses me SO much. I have two close friends (women) who have been texting me nonstop about how s**tty their significant others are, like going OFF about them, long voice messages, etc."

"Then between messages, I will open Facebook and see they just made a post about how much they love their partner with a cute picture and tons of hearts and s**t."

"Like... WHAT. I have never called them out, but what the h**l?"

- perfectdrug659

"Gah, my BIL (Brother-in-Law) divorced after a short two-year marriage, and this was the prime indicator of knowing that they were doomed."

"They did this kissy cutesy schmoopy lovey-dovey thing in public, and the worse their relationship got, the more publicly showy they were about showing how in love they were. It was horrific to watch unfold."

- abqkat

Controlling and Jealous Behavior

"In my experience, going out with my old homie that was married, I couldn't ever post us out at the bar or anything. If his wife saw it, she’d blow her top apparently."

"We went out for my 23rd birthday a couple of years ago and merely his elbow was in the video of me sipping on whatever drink I had. In a panic, he urged that I delete it before his wife saw it for whatever reason."

"They’re divorced now."

- jailbreakthetesla_

Mean to Their Partner

"When their identity is the 'person who is mean to their spouse.'"

"I was at a party this weekend and there was a woman who just bad-mouthed her husband and talked about how nice it was to be away from him and the kids for the night. That’s like her shtick… she talks about how her kids and husband are s**tty. It’s such a gross personality, and it’s relatively common. It shouldn’t be common at all."

- SpacemanPete

Flirting Elsewhere

"They flirt a lot. A lot of unhappily married people I know are quick to flirt with anyone who seems interested because they want to feel that spark again."

- FlatulentDwarf

Constant Check-Ins

"When one of them is out and their spouse does not stop calling them."

- BansheeShriek

"I can't imagine living like that. I took a 10-day road trip to the beach alone, and all my husband asked of me was to keep my location turned on in case of an accident, and text a few times a day so he knew I was alive. That's trust."

- HopefulKitty

The Depression or Glow Up Era

"If they suddenly seem really down on themselves or stop taking care of themselves for seemingly no reason, If their outlook on relationships and/or marriage had changed since getting married, If they have nothing good to say about their partner or just don't talk about them..."

"The list goes on."

- Misspent_interlude

"Or reverse, they start glowing up. They lose weight, focus on appearance more, it means they're getting ready to split."

- Alternative-Post-937

Wishful Widows

"When my husband died, some friends admitted that they were a little jealous."

- emmymcd

"My ex-husband responded, 'One can only hope,' and looked at me when he heard someone’s wife died."

- foldinthecheese89

"I would never say this to someone, but I understand the sentiment. I absolutely wished my ex-husband dead a handful of times. It's one of those things where you can't leave because I had very little money of my own and staying meant living with abuse."

- IsThatBlueSoup

Jealous of Working Relationships

"It's bad when you avoid or feel guilty talking about how happy you are or about the nice and thoughtful things that your partner does because you know your friend can't relate."

- anemic_girlfriend

"Yikes. This is how I am with a friend group of mine. They’re always complaining about their husbands, and I stay silent. I don’t want to rub it in that I love my husband and he’s mostly awesome. In the past two years, one has gotten divorced and another is on her way there."

- Nonny70

"It gets weird for me when people are like, 'Must be nice to get away from the wife' if I'm on a work trip or something."

"I don't understand. I sleep better when my wife's next to me, I feel better about the day when I get to see her and talk to her, she makes me smile all the damn time."

"Everybody on the planet is a very distant second on my list of people I want to be around, and even though we do plenty of things separately I don't see time apart as some sort of reprieve from her presence."

- HereToTheSquatch

Wishing They Were Out

"I got married young and a lot of older guys gave me s**t for it, like they resented their wives for settling down too soon. It upsets me when men talk s**t about their wives. If you hate your wife, then leave, she’s probably better off without you."

"My wife is my best friend. Seven years later, our relationship only grows stronger over time. If you love someone and they love you back, be grateful for that and show it!"

- Apprehensive-Hall254

There are many ways to tell that a relationship is in a downward spiral, especially when the relationship is not our own.

But these accounts were intense and ones that we can only hope are less common.

Whenever we feel like something isn't right about our bodies or we're suffering from some kind of medical issues, we want them taken care of straight away.

The problem with that is, that depending on whom we're getting information from, we tend to believe in the initial diagnosis or remedy because we trust the professional sources and we want quick solutions.

But do doctors and health specialists always know what they're talking about?

Unfortunately, that is not always the case.

Strangers online shared their medical horror stories when Redditor Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo asked:

"What is the worst health advice you've been given?"

Not doing further research into something that raises eyebrows can be a fatal mistake.

Turns Out It Was Brain Cancer

"i went cross eyed and my primary said 'could be a sinus thing, get some mucinex.'”

"turns out it was glioblastoma."

– Guy_Faux

"Wow, that's an absurdly sh**ty doctor. The same thing happened to my mother and it was quickly determined that it was stage 4 lung cancer. She made it about 3 months after that. She was 48 and I was 18 so the idea that any doctor would ignore that is infuriating to me."

– Frisky_Picker

Second Opinion Saves Lives

"My primary doctor kept telling me that nothing was wrong with my thyroid, and I was a hypochondriac."

"I had been told at 12 years old that I had thyroid issues and she told me that doctor was wrong. I had to see a whole other doctor to get a referral to the endocrinologist because she literally refused to refer me to one."

"The endocrinologist said, I had scarring all over my thyroid, I had Hashimoto’s, and my levels were horrible, and she didn’t know what the doctor was talking about. She said she was glad I advocated for myself."

– littlemybb

Tiny Grandchild

"I was not the recipient of this 'advice' but I had a coworker proudly say how small her new grandchild was when they were born and that her daughter smoked her whole pregnancy to try and have a smaller baby. This was in like 2010, not the 1960s for reference."

"ETA: smoked cigarettes. clarified since that can mean more than one thing."

– Emkems

Unforeseen Ailment​

"Was sick for a year in my late teens. Saw multiple specialists to find the cause. Experimented with diet. Saw a naturopath that did some ‘electric pulse test’ thing that apparently gave indicators of organ health. After a few visits, and months of eating the weirdest sh*t, the test said things were improving (including my gallbladder). Months went on but I was still quite sick. I eventually ended up in hospital and one of my specialists decided to take my appendix out on a whim to see if it might help. Turns out I had something called a ‘grumbling appendix’ and it completely fixed me. Funny thing is, while they were in there, they discovered I was born without a gallbladder."

– Ok_Ear_8848

These are not appropriate remedies.

That's Not How That Works

"When I had an urinary tract infection someone told me to wash my vagina with vinegar..."

– _Puke_Bucket_

"And maybe add some diced onions and tomatoes to make a refreshing Mediterranean salad."

– Bos_lost_ton

Pushing Through

"Just push through whenever you're sick. If you can get to a doctor's office for a doctor's certificate you can get to school/college/work."

– BoyMonday

"My childhood pediatrician told my parents that 'A sick child never smiles.'”

"I tend to laugh/smile when I’m nervous or uncomfortable to self regulate."

– pinotproblems

"A doctor once told my parents that a child who isn’t crying can’t really be hurt. Because of that, it took me days to convince my parents to take me to the doctor after I fell on my arm because I wasn’t crying. It turns out it was broken."

– slowsunslumber

"Ignoring" The Problem Isn't A Solution

"A friend of mine was in horrible pain, and was repeatedly told (by multiple doctors) that she should stop complaining and just get used to it because periods are painful and that’s the way it is."

"After being blown off for years, she finally got a doctor to take her pain seriously- and it turned out she had severe endometriosis. The surgeon said it was the worst case he had ever seen in his career, and was horrified that it had gotten so advanced with no one listening to her."

– sapphireblossoms

Choking On Blood

"The school nurse telling me to tilt my head back for a bloody nose. That was an awful experience."

– hypo-osmotic

"I do like doing this because when I cough up the blood I can pretend I’m in a period drama and I have tuberculosis."

– OrangeTree81

These Redditors discovered that all pain is not necessarily "normal."

The C-Word

"Doctor said certain pain is normal as you get older. Turns out it was cancer."

– REDDIT

"That's a fibrous strip of breast tissue, you're too young to have breast cancer."

"Delayed diagnosis by 6 months. I was 31."

– juniper_max

Thinking Twice About Back Pain

"I got from a doctor, 'everyone has back pain. There’s nothing wrong with you, just use a heating pad.' It was kidney stones."

– 5hrs4hrs3hrs2hrs1mor

"Yikes, I am so sorry."

"I had a kinda similar experience. I went to the doctor for a morning appointment to get some persistent, worsening back pain checked out. Doc asked me where my back pain was, looked me in the eyes and told me I was fine and must have just slept wrong. He shut me down when I tried to advocate for myself."

"That night, I was admitted to the ER due to the crippling pain I was in. Turns out I had a serious kidney infection that was turning septic."

"One of the ER staff who helped me told me if I had waited another 24 hours, my kidneys would have shut down and I very likely would have died from organ failure?!"

"I’ve been dismissed by doctors over and over again in my personal health journey, and it is so frustrating and scary, as they’ve dismissed me for 'being dramatic' when there’s actually something very serious going on with my body."

– Yarr0wFeather

Vitamin D Overdose

"If you have pale skin, get just a little sunburnt every day so that your skin will 'learn' to get a tan. That’s how everyone else does it."

"My Solar Keratosis skin cancers would beg to disagree."

– comfortablynumb15

As much as we want to believe our doctors when they give us a health assessment and assure us we're "fine," you should never ignore your inner voice telling you that something is not right.

Your conscience is there for a reason.

Even if a doctor tells you it's okay to ignore the problem, you should think twice about ignoring your gut feelings.

Woman speaking to an audience
Photo by Ben Moreland on Unsplash

When giving a speech and making an argument, the most effective way to reach other people or get your point across is to speak with conviction.

However, speaking with conviction doesn't always mean people are speaking the truth... or even coherently.

Redditor MonkeyGentleman420 was curious to hear more stories of ludicrous things people said with unwavering conviction, leading them to ask:

"What is the stupidest thing someone has told you with complete conviction?"

We Know How Often Birds Check Clocks...

'That we set the clocks forwards and backwards so the birds don’t get confused with their migration patterns."- alliecita410

Speaking From Experience?

"'Two people can breathe underwater forever if they have a hose'."

"The first person breathes in while the second breathes out, then the first person breathes out and the second person breathes in etc'."- PahoojyMan

Dream On...

"She said:'

"'If you are dream about falling and you hit the ground in your sleep you'll actually die'."

"'It's been proven'."

"I said 'If you die in your sleep, how can anyone know what you were dreaming?'"

"Ruined a favorite story of hers."

"Sorry."- FrankieMint

falling GIFGiphy

Because ALL Cops Ask For Your SSN Before Cuffing You...

"From a coworker: 'If you don't have a social security number then the government can't do anything to you'."

"I asked if that meant, if I didn't have an SSN then I could just go kill someone on the street and the government couldn't arrest me."

"'Yep', he said, 'if you don't have an SSN then they can't enforce any laws on you'."- AllAboutThePotatoes

Keep Them Away From Needles...

"A former coworker insisted that the body believes the ears are injuries, and we are all constantly trying to heal our own ears closed."

"The only thing keeping them open, you ask?"

"Ear wax."

"We worked in healthcare."- Reflection_Secure

Credit To the Visual Effects Designer

"A girl I worked with was convinced that every single mythological creature was real."

"I’ll never forget one of her claims."

“Think about it, every movie you done seen all those creatures and aliens and sh*t, all that’s real."

"Someone has to have actually seen it to come up with that!”

"Apparently there’s no such thing as the human imagination to her."

"So yes, transformers are real, Godzilla is real, Independence Day is real."

"This was a 20-year-old that said all of this."- Dragonborn83196

Unicorn GIF by MOODMANGiphy

In Theory... Still Wrong!

"That the speed of light wasn’t like an actual number, it was just a figure of speech."- sunbearimon·

Check The Date...

"Sunburn is not caused by the sun, it is actually caused by sunblock."

"If you don't use sunblock then you will never be burned."

"Sunburn was created by the sun cream industry to sell their products."

"Seems easily testable, why not lie on the beach all day in one position with no sun block and see what happens?"

"Make sure you fall asleep for maximum effect."

"You go bright red and then blister to the point that you get taken to hospital for a combination of sunstroke and the beginning of shock then spend the rest of the holiday indoors face down with regular application of creams and replacement paraffin patches on the burns."

"It puts a bit of a dampener on your 2 week break."

"Sunburn is mentioned in Livy's history of the second Punic war and others over 2000 years ago which is solid proof that the 'Big Sunscreen' claim is ridiculous."

"However it would be hand-waved away by a True Believer of big Sunscreen."- Magnus_40

Sonne Sunburn GIF by Mitteldeutscher RundfunkGiphy

Ignorance Is Not Always Bliss...

"A distant relative, recently retired, once told me that he was going to hire a gardener and a housekeeper because 'the government will give you a grant to pay for them now'."

"This was a few minutes after a lengthy rant about how the welfare state should be scrapped because only lazy people lose their jobs and need to claim benefits."

"The same relative, some years ago, also announced with absolute conviction that he was going to hire a neighbor as a cleaner because 'she won't have anything to do now her kids are grown up'."- Plantagenesta

The Price Of Never Looking Up!

"Pineapples aren't real."

"They're entirely manmade and do not exist in nature."- tricksterloki

ALWAYS CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR!!!

"My dad was experiencing end stage renal failure (was on dialysis at the time and has since had a transplant)."

"My best friend's boyfriend at the time looked at me dead in the eye and said he could reverse his condition with a vegan diet and that the only important organ in the body was the skin, so as long as you take good care of your skin, your other organs will function properly."

"Mind you, by the time my dad got on dialysis his kidneys were functioning at 11% and his SKIN WAS JUST FINE."- lyingintheleaves

But What Causes Cavities?

"I'm a dental hygienist."

"We had a patient come in with terrible teeth."

"They thought toothpaste caused cancer."- dilapidatedfungus

If Only...

"That women don't burp or fart, because only men have (the ability to pass) gas."

"Spoiler alert: he was horrified when I burped in front of him."- sequoia_summers

Guilt Is Easier When You Know It's Coming.

"First girlfriend was religious, and apparently it was okay that we had sex 'as long as she feels bad about it after'."

"Pre-planning regret was her loophole to do what she wanted."- Lone_Buck

season 2 famalam GIF by BBC ThreeGiphy

When people do speak with conviction, more often than not they firmly believed what they say.

So much so, that they have trouble believing the person brave enough to correct them.

In spite of the concrete evidence thrown in front of them...