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Gay Guys Share Their Best 'Sorry Ladies, I Like Men' Experiences

I would if I could but.... penis.

Being gay is special. It's too long to explain it all, just trust the truth. Ladies... and maybe some gents, accepting the way God made is all is a very sobering experience. Telling the gay truth can be... no... IS empowering but can also be very entertaining.

Redditor InFinder2004 wanted to hear from all the men of same-sex persuasion about trying to chat with the ladies by asking:

(Serious) Gay men of Reddit, what was your "Sorry ladies, I like men" moment?


I Wanna Dance With Somebody!

Giphy

I was at a music festival and one of my favorite artists came out and played a great set. It's absolutely packed and I'm dancing my booty off in a huge crowd of people having a great time. I guess the girl standing in front of me thought I was dancing up against her to try and make a move? She turns around and tells me she has a boyfriend - literally told her "that's great, I'm gay so that's not really any concern of mine, but I really dig your 80s top so you do you." cariboozer_

"you're actually gay?!"

I sat in the back corner of health class when I was a junior, though at my new school it was a freshman class. I immediately had 5 girls surround me, it was clear a couple of them had a crush. I moved a lot so it was normal for people not to know me and normal for me to keep to myself. Granted, I'm not a small guy but I was still nervous about being "out". One day they spent a good 20 minutes literally giving me a sales pitch on which one of them was hotter and wouldn't stop bugging me for an answer.

At some point one of the louder ones asked out of nowhere, "are you gay?". I said without even thinking, "yes, so stop asking!". She screamed , no joke, "you're actually gay?!" Loud enough for people in the hall to stop and look in. It was almost worse because now these five girls immediately clung onto their first "gay friend". Could've been worse, I had to fight at a couple past schools. Now though, I had a fairly impenetrable girl shield so nobody had a thing to say. First time I came out publicly too. thatguyinthejeans

girl please....

I had a group of girls on the train once chastise me for staring at their friend's butt. I told them I was gay and was only staring at her questionable fashion choices.

(She looked fine, but I was a little insulted and had to retaliate). llieno94

"cool, me too"

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I went to a club and I was looking at this girl simply because I liked her outfit but she then noticed me staring. She looked me dead in the eye and said, "stop staring at me weirdo, I have a boyfriend." And without any hesitation I replied with, "cool, me too". lilpickle00

KFC Forever....

One time I was getting KFC with a friend and I think the girl at the counter must have misread my politeness. Once I'd gone to sit down with my friend she came past and was like "Here" and put a piece of paper on the table pretty abruptly before walking off. Basically it was a short message and her number.

I'm pretty obviously not straight in the way I present myself so this sort of thing doesn't normally happen to me and I wasn't sure what to do. In the end I spent like an hour trying to find out the best way to say "Hey you seem nice and good on you for being so ballsy but also I'm gay."

I also made the mistake of posting about it on Facebook because it was pretty funny, especially if you know me. But someone saw it who knew both of us and put two and two together. So basically I fucked up a bit there.

She was real nice about it all and she thought it was funny too so it was chill. I was very out of my depth though. Lloydshanks

noviO, NOT noviA.....

I'm a white guy who tends to get read as gay in white communities because I'm short, generally well-dressed, and have a higher pitched voice. I work with Latino communities a lot in my job, though, and for them, I often get read as masculine/straight because I have facial hair. Different cultural benchmarks I guess, no big deal imo.

One time, though, I had two women in the community open up that they got in a big fight over me. One was mad that the other was spending more time with me. I just sat there dumbstruck and scared about outing myself because I didn't want to stop working with them. I just had to casually mention my noviO, NOT noviA and they figured it out. I think they just felt silly. I still work with them, great ladies. One of them is going to cook me mole soon, I'm stoked. throw_away1232123221

back to me....

I was at a hotel. I walk into the elevator and a girl is standing there. To make the ride less awkward, I ask how her day is going. She immediately says "Back off! I have a boyfriend" I said "Yeah, so do I. Anyways, back to my question." PrettyBoy6167

Flipped...

I had a co-worker who would flirt with our male coworkers to get them to do her work. She tried the hair flip and eye bat with me one day, I just laughed and said sorry not interested in what you got. foolhardyass

Why not the Men?

Giphy

All the time, unfortunately. Well, actually, rarely do I even notice that a lady is flirting with me, it usually has to be pointed out to me after the fact. But dozens of times ladies have tried to flirt with me, and those times that I either do pick it up, or someone else points it out to me I have to gently let them know that my boat does not sail in that direction and I am not accepting ladies as passengers.

Then it makes me mad. I get ladies to flirt with me, but never the men :( I don't think that's fair. I could in theory get what I don't want, but I can't get what I do want. llcucf80

On the Video....

I was video calling my husband from my car in a parking lot outside the store, and there was a lady milling around who looked a bit dressed up but didn't seem to be wearing pants (or a skirt, or anything in that "equip slot"). I kept glancing over at her, trying to figure out why there's a pantsless lady wandering around. And then she started walking straight toward my car. Most people who've approached me in my parked car have been panhandlers, and I wasn't in the mood to get asked for money or really talk to strangers at all, so I drove away.

In retrospect, I'm pretty sure I almost was approached by a sex worker (who thought I was interested because I was looking at her) in the middle of a phone call with my husband. firstmatedavy

"Oh god no I'm gay"

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One time I told a girl that I liked her boots (in my defense they were awesome) but she and her boyfriend thought I said boobs. "Oh god no I'm gay" helped me a lot that day. adeiner

 "so do I!" 

I was in the elevator of a resort going to my room, as I just arrived in town and needed to get ready for a trade show. In comes 3 drunk chicks from the pool, one goes "I like men with beards" trying to flirt, when I replied "so do I!" She went from trying to boink to trying to be my fruit fly. Lvs2splooge4lulzzz

Sorry Boo...

I'm more on the skinny side of men and if you looked at me long enough you'd know damn well I'm gay. Apparently though it depends on where I am that people notice this fact. While at a bar with a couple of my friends (3 straight dudes and 1 bi guy) I was talking with a lot of the women that my straight friends were chatting with as well, just being friendly you know. One of them, really pretty lady, was talking to me and telling me that she liked my confidence in talking to women (which my confidence comes from wanting a conversation not a hookup) and gave me her number. Let me tell you my conversational confidence disappeared like that and I panicked and was like "oh my god I'm so sorry I'm gay I like men ahhaaha". Luckily she didn't seem to fazed by that and we ended up having a lovely conversation. Reddit

 "Are you into guys?"

I was at a bar with my friends, standard. Rather tipsy girl comes over and starts trying to grind on me. It's inappropriate anyway, but I have to turn to her to push her away, because I was rather uncomfortable. She looks a little offended, so I ask her the classic "Are you into guys" she says yes and I say "me too."

Mistake, she immediately changes tack and starts with the gay best friend thing (rude) then proceeded to fall backwards over a barstool. I escaped and went back to talking about Formula 1 with my friends while she found a dude to make out with. Matduka

Like a Virgin....

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Haven't had one. Usually ladies just ask me if I have a "girlfr..." pause as if coming to a realization and continue with "rrrsignificant other?" Just started a new job and that exact sequence of syllables has happened to me at least three times in as many days. Apparently I'm just obvious enough that you can tell, but not until you're mid-sentence. pots-and-pans-robot

Stay Sober...

I was getting drunk with my manager out in the parking lot after my last day of work. General I'm going to miss you, it's been fun, remember that time... kind of stuff. She confessed she had feelings for me but because of the company's strict rules on fraternization she kept it to herself. She then asked if I wanted to go back to her place. Now I never talked about my sexuality, I prefer to be single so people would probably assume from a distance and never be validated one way or the other.

I wouldn't lie if someone asked but I pass for straight so no one ever really did. I told her what the deal was, but surprisingly this didn't change her mind. She was not a person that was used to or would tolerate rejection. This made her a great GM but not very personable. In fact she kind of got offended and continued to come on to me regardless, right there in the front seat of her car. Again I told her it wasn't going to happen and I didn't feel comfortable with her advances. She then tried renegotiating, asking if she could just perform oral on me instead. SaltyPoseidon22

​So, I rolled with it,.......

Back home in the US, I am coded gay, particularly my voice. However, where I live now, I am just seen as "The American."

I had a really nice woman strike up a conversation with me, I was really enjoying things until she touched my hand and laughed. I thought that was really weird because I typically don't like being touched, but when she laughed, I realized that she was flirting with me, not just having a conversation.

So, I rolled with it, and a couple of minutes later referred to my dogs and my husband.

The cold shoulder I got afterward made me wish I had kept my mouth shut... we were having a great conversation and she was lovely.

Conversely, I have often found that women will be a bit standoffish of me until I mention my husband, at which point the mood completely changes, and I see a much brighter, happier, and less reserved person. This is by far the most common thing that happens.

It makes me sad that both happens. anderlustcub

Hey Homo....

In the school hallway I was yelled at by some girl because they thought I was looking at her friends butt. I was literally wearing a pink shirt with rainbow stripes and an earring. It would literally take two seconds looking at me to know that I'm gay. I just laughed and said "nah, I'm homo." And walked away. gaychicagoan

TERRIBLE.

i was at work, at the movie theater, and i waited on this group of three girls, and the ones mother.

the girl who apparently was interested in me appeared to have some bad social anxiety as she was doing everything with her mother, as her mother kept reassuring her with everything that she was doing, and that everything was okay.

so i finish waiting on them, then go into the lobby to go clean up the counters, stock lids, etc. then when i'm walking back past them, the girls friends stop me, and say

"my friend thinks you're really cute, and we were wondering if she could have your number?"

and she was sitting there with her mother, looking like she was suuuper nervous, so this made me feel TERRIBLE.

so i had to reply back with

"oh i'm sorry, i'm actually kinda... gay. i feel so bad i'm sorry, i'm sure you'll find someone though, best of luck!"

then i walked away, continuously feeling bad for this girl because she took a chance and i ended up not even liking girls oof. kylecello

Bar Trap....

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I was out at a bar catching up with my siblings and a few friends when one girl started hitting on me. My sister leaned over and said "you're barking up the wrong tree there, he likes dudes". Poor girl looked so embarrassed... She didn't end the night empty handed. My brother took her home instead 😂😂 tumekeLV

The Corporate Decisions That Were Met With Huge Public Backlash

Reddit user Astro_Shogun asked: 'What decision by a company received the most amount of backlash from the public?

Corporations don't get big overnight.

A lot of tough decisions, big wins, and sometimes even bigger losses, go into their growth.

But sometimes companies make mistakes that the public simply cannot let slide, and it can be hard to imagine how the company could stay afloat after the backlash.

Redditor Astro_Shogun asked:

"What decision by a company received the most amount of backlash from the public?"

Dang It, Photobucket

"When Photobucket decided to take the whole internet hostage by asking for 400 dollars a year for what was previously a free image storage solution. The move broke years of forum posting and erased a significant portion of the web collective knowledge."

- denpo

"Yup. And now they're holding almost all of my son's childhood photos (some of which I managed to save in other places) hostage."

- KnockMeYourLobes

"Browse any forum thread from the early 2000s and practically all the images are gone because everyone used Photobucket back then. It will be the same way with Reddit whenever Imgur goes under."

- NothingOld7527

So Salesy

"JCPenny doing away with sales and trying to present itself as a more upscale store. Sales immediately plummeted, and they reversed course quickly."

- flyingcircusdog

Cheap Jewelry

"Gerald Ratner said the reason his jewelry company could sell stuff so cheap was because the products were crap. It destroyed the company overnight."

- simplemtbman

Front Wheel Drive

"Ford, in the '80s, tried to replace the aging Fox body Mustang with a front-wheel drive, Mazda-based car. This was pre-internet, but car people got UPSET and deluged Ford with a letter expressing their anger."

"Ford backtracked, kept the Fox body around, and released the vehicle that was going to be the new Mustang as the Probe. It lasted two generations, but the Mustang soldiers on."

- StillN0tATony

Online Only

"Microsoft got roasted when they announced Kinect and always-online were required for the Xbox One. Took all the momentum they had from the 360 era and put them miles behind Sony."

- Jerry_Williams89

Childhood: Destroyed

"Sonic having human teeth."

- LightDash

"I just immediately pictured teeth in a Sonic milkshake and had a horrified reaction before my brain caught up to you meaning the character."

- Rolizas

Questionable Upgrades

"Very recently, T-Mobile. A company that 10 years ago called itself the Uncarrier by making a series of pro-consumer changes to its plans and the previous CEO built almost a sort of cult of fans of the company. Then T-Mobile acquired Sprint and got a new CEO."

"A couple of weeks ago, T-Mobile internal documentation revealed it was going to automatically upgrade customers on old grandfathered plans up to new plans, which were more expensive. Customers would have to call in to opt out of the change. 'They weren’t raising customers’ rates, they were moving them to better plans.'"

"Well, major tech news got ahold of that, and then even some local news stations, and T-Mobile quietly 'clarified' a week later via internal communications that only one percent of their customers would be affected."

- artimaticus8

Coming Together in Hate

"Anyone remember the Kendall Jenner Pepsi ad when she solved police brutality?"

- vernon3

"Those moments are precious. There are a few things these days that bring everyone on the Internet together. That was one of those things. We all hated the Pepsi ad that solved police brutality."

"That ad had it all. Pandering, ignorance, arrogance, and talking down to their audience."

- notwoutmyprob

"And a Kardashian."

- Kitchen_action

With Every Purchase

"I couple of years back a local Detroit area car dealership decided the best way to celebrate MLK day was to give away free car alarms with every purchase."

"Nobody liked that."

- graveybrains

A Sale Gone Too Well

"Hoover UK offering two free flights to America if you spend £100 on their products. They anticipated that people would spend a lot more than the minimum required which would cover the approximately £600 value of the tickets."

"When the company was deluged with purchases around the £100 mark, they reneged on the offer, which prompted a very expensive lawsuit. The fallout was so bad that the UK division of the firm was sold to a rival company."

- Live-Dance-2641

New Drink, Who Dis?

"New Coke."

- PeggyWithPhatA**

"After the relations disaster, the public clamored for the decision to be reversed, and Coca-Cola released 'Coke Classic.'"

"Coke Classic soon had an even higher market share than Coke did before the public relations fiasco, and a new theory made the rounds: that Coca-Cola deliberately made these decisions, simply to gain publicity, and increase market share."

"The reaction from Coca-Cola’s executives was, 'We aren’t that smart, and we aren’t that stupid.'"

- Malthus1

A Tweet Turned Sexist

"Burger King stating that 'Women Belong in the Kitchen.' What they were TRYING to say was that they wanted more diversity. People didn't see it that way, and in the end, they had to issue an apology."

- zerbey

The Downfall of an Incredible Publication

"Here’s one there should be a public outcry about."

"Disney bought National Geographic and controls everything it does. This is the last year the iconic magazine will be available. I’m incensed."

- redheadMInerd2

(The writer of this article is equally incensed.)

Predicting the Future

"I feel like whatever YouTube is cooking up lately will be the next one."

- Just_Aioli_1233

"Tech companies sure know how to kill off highly popular and profitable apps, super quick. It’s interesting to watch it happen in real-time. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, all losing tons of followers and destroying their own stock."

- Eleanor_of_Accutane

It's easy to see how all of these mistakes resulted in huge backlash, sometimes at the total expense and downfall of the business.

But some of these mistakes were made by companies that are still huge today, and to a certain extent, that's kind of surprising.

Demonstrator holds sign that reads, "Drop this act of corporate gree!"
Patrick Perkins/Unsplash

Companies are typically in business for profit, and very few have the goal of keeping the customer's interests in mind.

But some corporations go even further to get more out of their customer in exchange for their "quality services" and as a result, the line between general business and scam becomes blurred.

Redditor jwwin asked:

"What is a predatory business that shouldn't be legal, but is?"

Students paying an exorbitant amount in tuition in order to seek higher learning should be warned there are additional expenses to cover for.

A Textbook Example

"College textbooks, they will release an 'updated' edition every semester but the information doesn't change. And then after you spent a fortune on the books the places that buy textbooks will give you like 5% of what you paid for the book."

– teethalarm

A "Double Whammy"

"Former Prof here. I talked with a book rep about this once and learned a lot. It is a bit complicated but worth understanding. Book publishers rely on large quantity sales to make any money on a book because the cost of production is so high up front (author, editors, printing, etc.). So, for a book to be profitable, it has to sell a lot of copies to spread the cost of production across all the books. A paperback in the fiction section might sell 100,000 or more. A textbook might sell as few as 1,000. So, the publisher needs everyone to buy the book to break even."

"Now add colleges into the mix. Somewhere in the 1980s (give or take), colleges saw publishers selling books and making larger profits on them than the college bookstore was making per book. So they got the bright idea to start buying used texts and reselling them. Before that, a text would come out and 97% (making the number up but it was close to that) of the students would buy the book in year one, 85% in year two, 75% in year three, 60% in year four and 50% in year five. A $50 dollar book would cost $25 to make (again, making the numbers up), sell to the bookstore for $40 ($15 publisher profit), and be sold to the student for $50 ($10 bookstore profit). Across the five years, the producer would make a profit."

"Then, college bookstores began offering students $25 for a used book and selling it for $40 ($15 profit - $5 higher than that of a new book). Students would then prefer the $40 used book over the $50 new book. But that cut the publisher's sales from 97% to 50% in the first year. Because they could not sell as many books they had to do two things: (1) raise the initial price of the text to cover the production cost in 1-2 years rather than 4-5 years, and (2) cut the cycle down from 4-5 years to 1-2 years to ensure that they got sales of the book. That is a double whammy. Texts that used to cost $50 now cost $300 or more. And they have a new version out every 18 months or so. Students refuse to pay that price and that cuts the sales numbers even further forcing the price up again. And, with new editions out so frequently, it is harder to sell them back to the bookstore."

"That's why you see so many 'course packs' now - where a professor will pick a few pages from a book to give to the students. I went from having nearly every student purchasing a text in my early career to having zero students with a text late in my career. Your professor probably dislikes the state of affairs as much as you do. I cut down what books I would select because I could not justify students paying that much for what they were getting. I would also recommend students look for older editions on Amazon and the like which got me in trouble with my administration because I was not supporting the bookstore. But, it was difficult to teach from a text that no one had or had access to. The University's desire to generate revenue from texts truly was killing the chicken because it was not producing enough eggs."

"So look for an older edition on Chegg, Amazon, or the like and match it up with what your professor is teaching from the new edition. You are right, it probably has not changed. Be careful for the problems at the end of the chapter - that is often where the changes are."

– BewnieBound

These businesses parade as services but they are notorious for taking more than what you're willing to pay for.

For A Future Owner

"Rent to Own (furniture, appliances, TVs, video game systems, etc.) The mark up on the interest over time ends up costing 4 times the purchase - or more."

– PartyAlarmed3796

"Well the trick is to not pay (seems to be what a lot of people do)."

– Expensive_Ad2695

"Which is why those places are so expensive and why they're actually kinda necessary for some people."

"They're taking a pretty big risk on people with no credit, and if a person with shi*ty credit needs a refrigerator or other necessary appliance, there's usually nobody else willing to work with them. Also, most of them report to credit agencies so you can build your credit through them."

"I'm not a fan by any means and I hate that people are buying video game systems and couches through them, but I still think they're filling a need."

– Pitiful-Pension-6535

Money Sucker

"Payday loan companies – they're like financial vampires, sucking the life out of people with high-interest rates."

– neonliolia

"And yet most of them are owned by major banks... hmmmm."

"Bank of America, Wells Fargo, US Bank, JP Morgan/Chase collectively all own the largest payday lender companies."

– Bramtyre

"In Canada, there is an effort to turn Canada Post into a kind of bank that offers basic banking services to the most vulnerable. Not sure what happened to that, but it was an alternative to check cashing and payday loan rackets."

– hobbitlover

Greedy Event Vendor

"Ticket Master."

– LTVOLT

"Agreed. We went to a preseason hockey game the other week. Tickets were $5 each but there was around $8 of Ticketmaster fees for each one and you had to use their app to get in the door because the barcodes change like every 30 seconds or something. It's ridiculous."

– darfus1895

Where can citizens turn to receive genuine care without drying up their financial resources?

Big Pharma

"Health Insurance and over priced perscription drugs."

"Wife is type 1 diabetic. Her pump is over $1000 a month WITH 50% coverage. $177 for just the sensor pack. We have the best coverage we can afford."

– Dukeboys_

"US pays the middle man for health care coverage. The middle man and the health care provider come up with "health packages" you can buy into, just in case you get sick. It's just sick how they funnel money from the middle class into this."

– dcoolidge

"Healthcare insurance industry. They can straight up reject claims you should be covered for and make you jump through near endless hoops to get them to pay for the service that is part of your plan."

– ColdHardPocketChange

All Out To Get Ya

"Homeopathic 'medicine' sellers."

"Psychics"

"Domain search engine registration scams (fake emails or physical mail that shows up saying 'your domain search registration is about to expire' and look exactly like warnings that your domain name is about to expire)"

"Fake homeowner warranty/car warranty scams loaded with so many limitations and exclusions they’ll basically never pay out."

"Multilevel marketing systems like Amway."

– 4wqrewtety

Losing Sight Of Kids' Well-Being

"From my experience working in group homes for youth are awful. The owners only want money and the more kids in care the more money."

– OddReputation3765

Going Nowhere Fast

"Car insurance."

"You get penalized for using it. Even just once in some cases."

– Effective_Sundae_839

"1000% agree. I was rear ended by a hit and run driver while i was stopped at a stop sign. Literally came to a stop for 3 seconds max and got destroyed. Car insurance wanted to give me 4k and shut me up. It’s called the nuisance fee. I eventually lawyered up and got 25k out of it. But like wtf. B*tch that’s what we PAY FOR, following renewal of my policy it increased hundreds of dollars a month and that was even after i switched to a different company. 'A claim is a claim regardless who is at fault.'”

– HitBackZach

Businesses taking advantage of their customers should be a crime, yet here we are.

What companies can you think of that legally continue to look after their own profitable interests above providing a decent service?

Two women looking on over a sunset
Photo by Briana Tozour on Unsplash

Everyone has disagreed with their friends, even their best friend, at least once in their life.

Sometimes these disagreements might even lead to arguments or fights.

Of course, the sign of a true friendship is the ability to forgive and forget, and if all is not necessarily forgotten, it eventually becomes water under the bridge.

Sadly, this isn't the case for everyone, as sometimes words are said, or incidents occur that are difficult, if not impossible, to forgive and recover from.

Bringing even the closest friendships to an effective end.

Redditor Duemont62 was curious to hear what led people to cut one or more of their closest friends out of their lives, leading them to ask:

"What's something a friend did that made you end your friendship with them?"

Meow!

"She was a cat hoarder and when I talked her into giving up 20 she said that would help making space for the fall litters (outdoor feral)."

"I gave up."

"She had 120 cats inside her house."- MeowMix24

Not Even The Tiniest Gesture...

"I was run over by a drunk driver years back."

"Died temporarily and had to be revived at the hospital."

"Both my brothers told my best friend of over 20 years what happened."

"Not once did he reach out to see how I was or ask if I was ok or wished me well."

"I was hurt by it, but tried to make some sort of sense of it, like maybe he just didn’t know what to say or he was shocked by the news or he wanted to give me space to recover."

"Months later I’m home but still in crutches and can barely move without a great deal of pain."

"Reached out to my friend on the phone, talked a bit and asked if he felt like coming over to watch a movie, play some games and just hang out."

"I was lonely and missed him."

"He seemed enthused but asked if I could WALK to his house in December on icy roads barely able to hobble around on crutches to hang out there instead."

"He lived 0.2 miles from me and couldn’t drive or walk the roughly 5 minutes to my house."

"I stopped talking to him shortly after."- MitchConnor555

Victim Of The Bottle

"I had one where the guy was a horrendous drunk."

"Super sensitive to alcohol and would very easily slip into blackout status."

"When he would get drunk, he just wanted to f*ck with people and be a sh*t disturber."

"One night he was pretty drunk and we didn't feel like f*cking with with so we went out without him."

"We come home around 11 that night and he had a bunch of sketchy people in our house that we're also obnoxiously drunk."

"He was almost passed out on the couch after he had burned a huge hole in our carpet after going into my room and getting my hookah setup."

"I go upstairs and there are just random people I had never met just chilling out in the random bedrooms."

"Some people smoking weed on my bed."

"One random drunk guy was screaming at someone on the phone and gave the person on the phone our address and told them to bring everyone over."

"We kicked everyone out which of course was a huge scene and conflict."

"We booted the guy out the next day."

"Haven't talked to him since"- PutinBoomedMe

When People Refuse To Change...

"Maybe not anything dramatic but my best friend from university came back to visit his parents who live in the same city as me and we wanted to have dinner."

"I knew he was super flakey in university, so I made sure I kept my week open because I knew he wouldn't know when he was available until the last minute."

"I was so excited to introduce him to my fiancé and show him our new house."

"We got everything for a really nice dinner."

"The day before we had planned to have dinner, he texted me that he didn't feel like driving over from his parent's house (30 min) the next day because 'he might be tired'."

"I was mad that he was flaking on such important plans, but I offered to bring all the stuff for dinner and drive out to him instead."

"He said, 'No thanks'."

"I realized that he really didn't care about anything that was going on in my life and was still as immature as he had been in university."

"I decided it wasn't a friendship I wanted to maintain anymore."- kitskill

It Was All Fine Till SHE Came Along...

"He married a girl who is incredibly hard to get along with and turned into a robot."- Gua_Bao

Warped Priorities...

"Friends for over a decade."

"I was her maid of honor."

"She had 3 children with her husband, whom I was also very good friends with."

"I was very close with the kids, they called me auntie."

"I worked for her out of a home office."

"Watched the marriage deteriorate."

"She started a relationship with one of her clients after the marriage ended."

"She then started to treat her children like a burden."

"The new relationship was (and still is, to the best of my knowledge) more important than her children."

"When someone starts to severely neglect their children for a new exciting f*ck boy, I have to walk away."- redrainbow76

Friends Don't Take Advantage Of Other Friends...

"They were using me for free rent and as a scapegoat."- Chicago_Synth_Nerd_

The Green Eyed Monster...

"After talking to a guy I liked, we found out my 'best friend' was telling both of us that the other person didn't like us/found us annoying."

"He would ask her to invite me to parties, and she'd tell him I couldn't come, or that I said no and that he annoyed me."

"She'd tell me that he didn't invite me because he thought I was annoying."

"All because she liked him but wouldn't admit it to anyone."

"When we finally realized, we got together and stopped being friends with her."

"We've been together for 11 years now!"- horton_hears_a_homie

Not There When You Needed Them...

"The last straw: showing me no support when my dad passed away."- didyoubutterthepan

What Goes Around Comes Around...

"My best friend of 10 years and her husband had a falling out with my brother because my brother chose to stay out of a situation they were having with someone else, another mutual friend of ours."

"He didn’t wanna get involved."

"I agreed he shouldn’t get involved."

"They got so nasty and bitter about it all over time, and ended up lying to my brothers new wife and told her he cheated on her with one of our other friends."

"I knew this not to be true at all."

"They continued to make up stories and lie to her about him and it eventually destroyed their marriage because it created mistrust and conflict."

"His wife already had a lot of mental health struggles and it made it worse for her."

"They eventually divorced."

"I cut them out of my life."

"Since then, they have apologized and admitted to making up all the stories out of hurt and bitterness that my brother wouldn’t take their side in the conflict they were having with someone else, but it is all just too late."

"My brothers marriage was destroyed and so was our friendship."

"No coming back from that."

"By the way, my brother didn’t get involved because they were the ones in the wrong and if he told them that, imagine how much worse their revenge would be!"

"They’re unhinged."

"And their own marriage has since fallen apart."

"Karma."- NachosandMargaritas

Some might say that any true friendship is salveagable.

Leading one to wonder if any friend you found yourself cutting out of your life completely was ever a real friend at all.


man holding book on road during daytime
Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

Starting your first job is always nerve-wracking. The start of anything new usually is. That's why it's helpful to get some advice.

Before I started my first job, a friend of mine told me that there were a lot of things I should be willing to do in order to become indispensable, but one thing I should never do is give up lunch.

Even if it's a busy day and everyone is working through lunch, take five minutes to buy something at the deli next door or pop something in the microwave. You will not do your best work if you do not eat a meal.

I was very glad to get that advice, and it was something I always followed.

I also followed my own personal rule of writing down the process to do anything at work, even if it was as simple as where to look for a particular file. Anytime I thought 'oh, I'll remember,' I ended up having to ask again. It's always better to write it down so you not only know how to do it, but are the one that people come to when they need to know how to do it.

I'm not the only one that has good advice for someone starting their first job. Redditors are full of advice and are ready to share.

It all started when Redditor CampDreamy asked:

"What advice would you give someone starting their first job?"

Think Positive

"95% of success is showing up on-time and not having a bad attitude."

– Firebolt164

"There’s a quote that goes something like: you don’t need an advanced degree to show up on time, work hard, and have a positive attitude."

"I basically used this as my mantra as I built my career (and still do)."

– tyrannosean

"This has been my experience in my first ~5 years of employment. Being someone that people enjoy interacting with, sticking to deadlines, and broadly trying to make lives easier rather than harder will get you pretty close to the top, and it’s a lot easier than working overtime every day."

– 2catsinatrenchcoat

"Yep, when I was younger I always thought that just showing up on time, being a decent person to work with, and doing a good job were the bare minimum that everyone did....I learned later that this will put you above approximately 90% of your co-workers."

– raoulduke212

Sound Advice

"Poop on company time."

– 1320Fastback

"Well, sh*t."

– CampDreamy

"Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time."

– mrselfdestruct066

Everyone Makes Mistakes

"Don't worry about f**king up. You're going to f**k up. We all f**k up. Constantly."

"Learn from it when you f**k it up so you do it better next time and you'll be the best employee in any job."

– MaximumZer0

"And when (not if) you f**k up, own up to it, and do your best to fix it. It's way easier to fix a mistake when it first happens than 3 weeks or even hours down the line. This applies to basically any field."

– super5aj123

Gossip Girl

"Listen to gossip if you want, but never spread it."

– GamerMomLife

"Yep. I worked in a private pool snack bar kitchen last summer, and nearly all of my coworkers were high school girls. The amount of sh*t they talked on each other was insane, but I just tried my best to not get involved. It never became anything other than sh*t-talking, but it's just a good idea in general to keep your head down."

– super5aj123

"I work in a kitchen with majority middle-aged women, and it's simular to what you described."

– DeadStar800

Do It All

"If they tell you to sweep, just sweep. You still make the same amount. Unless you’re an MD or something else, in that case you’re f**ked!"

– PublicEnema11

"A programmer consultant I knew in the 90s lived by the motto "it all pays the same.""

"You want him to spend his $50/hr time doing things that an unpaid intern could handle? Sounds like an easy day."

– Cacafuego

(Don't) Let It Burn, Burn, Burn

"Don’t burn bridges if you quit or get fired."

– kbrown423

""Never cut what you can untie.""

"- Robert Frost"

– sophistt_

It's All Public

"Assume everybody in the company plus clients will read every email you send."

– CouchieWouchie

"Yeah this is genuinely a great rule that will save your @ss. Write every email as if it will be read by the whole org."

– FrungyLeague

"Also speak as though anything you say is being recorded."

– squished_frog

Protect Yourself

"Document EVERYTHING. Every time punch. Every direction from your supervisor."

– DejectedDonut

"Do this if you are working outside your duties/responsibilities as well, or directed to do things. You want a paper trail of why you did what you did if something screwy happens."

"Ideally, the work place should concentrate on policy, protocol, training, engineering and admin controls and such... but well stuff isnt always ideal."

– Zech08

Work Friends

"You're going to feel tempted to make strong relationships with your coworkers - but remember that you shouldn't share with anyone what you wouldn't want known by everyone. You may think you can trust someone, but you should have a bit of caution."

"A lot of work relationships feel a bit like a friendship, but they are not. If they move on, or you do, it is rare that you will stay in touch. Accept it for what it is."

– Mobtor

Education

"Take advantage of tuition reimbursement to get degrees/certifications that will benefit your career and don't worry about "owing" the company for it."

"Many industries have pretty generous tuition reimbursement programs where they cover your school but you owe them time after they cut those checks. A typical program might have a requirement that if you leave the company you need to pay back anything they had paid out in the last two years."

"The thing is that you want to leverage that degree for a salary jump and the current company won't give it to you because they have you "locked" in now, right?"

"So you interview for your next job and when that company gives you an offer you explain that you're on the hook for the tuition reimbursement at your old company "and since you will be getting the benefit of that education I will need a signing bonus to cover my financial obligation to my current employer.""

"Keep in mind that the signing bonus will be taxable income so you need to shoot for an amount that will have taxes taken out and leave what you need to pay back the tuition."

"I've known too many people who didn't get a degree that could have really helped them but they didn't want to be "on the hook" to their employer. I even know one guy who spent close to $30k out of his own pocket to get a master's degree because he didn't want to "be stuck here" when he was done."

– tacknosaddle

The Little Moments Matter

"Don’t miss any major life events (or the major life events of close family/friends) for work. You might feel pressure from your employer not to take the time off."

"The family/friends will still be around for many years, the first job probably won’t."

– mxxiestorc

Learn To Save

"Pension! Pension! Pension!"

"Put as much as you can afford to into your pension. Retirement might seem a lifetime away but the sooner you save for it the sooner you can achieve it."

– Grayzo

Money, Money, Money

"Pack a lunch! Eating out can put a huge dent in your paycheck!"

– awileycat

"Can't stress this enough. For the price of eating out unhealthy food for 1 day you can usually pack healthier lunch for 2-3 days."

– QuantumExileMusic

Oh, yes! I found out about that last one the hard way...and still haven't learned!