People Reveal The Times They've Realized Others Were Telling Their Story[rebelmouse-image 18350142 is_animated_gif=
We all have embarrassing moments. If we're "lucky", some of those moments end up entering into legend. Like the time I fell down a ramp at school and took out no less than a dozen people with me - because I couldn't walk in heels. Some friends are teachers at that same school now, and I was just informed that YUP - people still talk about it. Apparently, the importance of "proper footwear" - particularly on the ramp - is a topic of discussion now on Freshman orientation day.
**It was two decades ago. **
One reddit user asked:
Has anyone ever told you a story like "this thing happened to this guy" and you realized the story was about you, what's the story?
Bedtime Rules[rebelmouse-image 18350143 is_animated_gif=
Everyone in my 6th grade class had to go to a outdoor nature center for a 3 day camp. They have been doing it for 20+ years. The goal was to learn about the environment, team building etc.
Well on my last night at camp, 12 year old me rolled off the top bunk in my sleep and cracked my head against the concrete floor. A concussion, skull fracture, and brain bleed later I woke up in the ICU. Long story short, after a duration in the hospital I made a full recovery.
Flash forward to high school and they are asking for counselor volunteers for 6th grade camp. Wanting to prove to myself that I could make it through a camp meant for 12 year olds, I signed up. During the orientation/training they started talking about bedtime rules... Sure enough, they start telling a story about a kid who fell off the top bunk and was badly injured.
Only I knew it was me.
Still Pregnant[rebelmouse-image 18350144 is_animated_gif=
I spent 3 months in the hospital before giving birth due to my water breaking at 21.3 weeks. On Valentine's Day of all days! It was just like the movies, except there was multiple puddles of fluid on the floor.
So I go for a scan with the same lady about 2 months later (I had lots of scans between then, just with different techs). They wanted to check fluid levels and the babies growth. The tech asks why I was there and I told her my water broke early and I was in the hospital or something like that.
She then tells me "well at least it's not as bad as this girl whose water broke on Valentines Day. I came in the room and they had thrown down bed pads on the floor to soak up the fluid. I almost stepped in a puddle". I looked at her and said "yeah that was me". She goes "you're STILL pregnant"? Uh yeah. I laughed though
Ruining It For The Children[rebelmouse-image 18350145 is_animated_gif=
When I was a kid, I used to impersonate the Rock a lot because he was my favorite. This led the school to ban wrestling themed stuff.
Now, almost twenty years later, my friends kid goes to the same school and can't wear a John Cena shirt to school. Because they still have the rule.
That Pants Pisser[rebelmouse-image 18350146 is_animated_gif=
Someone once told me about a friend of a friend who got mugged downtown and pissed her pants from fright. That pants pisser was me.
Spoil My Legacy[rebelmouse-image 18350147 is_animated_gif=
When I was very new in police service, my helmet got stolen when I piled into a fight on a busy Night Time Economy patrol in the city. It came off when I ran in and someone picked it up and cycled off with it. One of the older officers told me that I needed to record a crime for the theft and inform the Inspector personally. Of course, that was rubbish, and I didn't need to inform anyone aside of recording the incident.
Years later, I was listening to two officers talk about "that rookie who got his helmet nicked in a fight" only the story had been so embellished that I supposedly hand-wrote the crime report and delivered it personally to the Chief Constable.
I didn't want to spoil my legacy, so I didn't say anything :)
Flappy Bird[rebelmouse-image 18350148 is_animated_gif=
Roommate in collegebhad an unhealthy obsession with flappy bird, this was shortly before the game was taken off the market. He was top 1% in the world, had an insane high score. He talked about hearing people behind him in a lecture hall about how their friend knew a guy that was in the top 1% of flappy bird. To him it was his 15 minutes of fame.
My Website[rebelmouse-image 18350149 is_animated_gif=
I came up with a website, we had a launch, received some decent praise locally. Real jobs got in the way so I let the project die. A couple of years down the road I mention to a co-worker about creating a site. He responds "Don't bother, there is already a site that does it." and he mentions the site I had created.
Mr. Steal Yo' Girl[rebelmouse-image 18348583 is_animated_gif=
Kind of - when I was younger I had a part time job in a DIY store. There was this guy who I worked with, roughly the same age as me but crazy and could beat me up quite easily but we got on well.
He starts telling me that some guy has been seeing his girlfriend and one of his friends seen them making out at a local club. I don't think too much of it and simply say that you should find the him and beat him.
Fast forward two week - I'm out with my friends and I bump into my work colleague. He's with his girlfriend and well, you've guessed it. His girl is a chick I was kissing in this club a few weeks ago. She doesn't acknowledge me as I think she's too shocked that I know her man. I sure as hell don't let on that I know her to my colleague as I like my body intact. We do the usual "Hey, where you going" etc and I get away from them.
For the next few weeks at work I was crapping myself thinking the next time my colleague and his girl have and argument, she'll spill the beans and I'll get murdered.
Perm[rebelmouse-image 18350150 is_animated_gif=
In 2013 I went to a cosmetology school and they supplied us with all kind of cool gadgets. One of which was a very small texturing iron. I loved it and would give myself very curly hair kind of borderline Shirley Temple but imagine tighter smaller curls. So anyway, I loved the look so so much that I decided I wanted a perm. We had been learning the process and I volunteered to be a model for the class...I asked my teacher to use the second smallest rollers in my hair. I had a bob cut. Everyone asked me if I was "sure I wanted to do this."
That should have been a clue. It was not.
So I'm sitting there, with a giant smile on my face, all excited for the results. They wash my hair. Pat it dry. Jheri Curl. No big deal, I'll style it at home it'll be fine..hah, right guys? I go home, it's terrible. I looked like Krusty the Clown. I ask myself in the mirror why I did this, cry and do exactly what I'm not supposed to do - wash my hair. I made it worse. But I'm stubborn and I still didn't learn.
It's the weekend and I can "fix" this, so I go to Sally's buy myself a perm kit and brush perm through my hair the next day. I processed the f*** out of my hair and ended up getting a pixie cut and growing it out.
My instructor was not happy. Everyone laughed. I died inside.
Years later, I meet someone that is attending the same cosmetology school I went to, and happens to have the same instructor I did.... and apparently she tells the story every year as a way to encourage the students to actually listen to the instructors.
Weird Cubicle Rocks[rebelmouse-image 18350151 is_animated_gif=
So when I got a new job, I was in a little cubicle. In my desk were some tiny decorative rocks, apparently from a previous employee's broken fountain. So I lined up all the rocks between me and the girl in the cubicle next to me. She didn't mind, she didn't really care.
I got promoted a few months later, moved to a bigger desk. Took my rocks with me, its a bit of a bigger cubicle. I had sat the rocks on a pile on my desk not knowing what to do with them. Another coworker who wasn't in my department asked me where I got the rocks, I told her how they were someone else's abandoned rocks I just took them. She then proceeded to tell me a story of this weird girl who lined up the rocks on the side of the cubicle...she said it was so weird.
I didn't even tell her it was me. I just nodded in agreement.
Arm Snapped Off[rebelmouse-image 18350152 is_animated_gif=
When I was in Year 8 I broke my arm very badly in PE playing bench ball. Like snapped in half requiring two surgeries and over a year of physiotherapy bad.
Fast forward to PE in Year 11 and walking back in to the same gym, a girl that I hadn't really started talking to until about a year earlier mentioned "Did you know I heard a girls arm snapped off in here!?" When I questioned her about it she recited all the details of how it happened (apart from my arm falling off, but I'll leave that to the effect of whispers changing the story a little) all the while not knowing she was talking about me.
The ER Trip[rebelmouse-image 18350153 is_animated_gif=
I was super accident prone as a child. This lead to a interesting trip to the ER.
My sister was chasing me around the backyard with a little plastic shovel and I was fleeing for my life. I fled to the side yard and dove into some tall grass, turned out there was a huge pile of redwood planks obscured by the grass. I dove in and came to an abrupt halt. I had managed to impale a roughly foot long redwood "splinter" (thing was about as think as a pencil) right in-between my left ring and middle finger, right through the webbing and all the way down to the wrist. I end up in the ER, and I had this very very attractive redheaded nurse that kept my attention even as a 9-year-old. I sat quietly while she slowly removed the whole twig from between my fingers.
Fast forward 2 months. I am camping with my grandparents and my grandpa is teaching me how to fish. I was using one of those little three pronged barbed lures, and when I cast it I noticed nothing hit the water, so I start reeling back my line and lure until it stops and my arm starts hurting. Oh well, certainly that is a coincidence. So I can't seem to reel my lure all the way back to me and I am tugging and reeling and my arm is hurting more and more until my grandpa noticed that I hooked my upper right arm and had successfully dug the barbed lure all the way into my arm. My grandpa being the resourceful one decided he can yank it out with pliers, so he grabs a pair. This pair must have been the original pair, they were huge and probably a good 73% solid rust. Several fruitless attempts later I am sat in the passenger seat of his truck being taken to the ER.
I get in there and I am wailing, and the universe decides to hate me today.
- We end up at the same ER that I went to for my twig removal
- My male nurse is wearing scrubs with a fishing lure pattern printed all over it.
- And lastly when they get me into the room, mister fishhook shirt has the audacity to tell me I shouldn't be crying, that it's not that bad, that some poor kid was in here just a few months ago with a huge stick stuck in his left hand right between his fingers.
I lose it. I start bawling and blubbered out a"That.. that was me!" The nurse looks up at my grandpa and my grandpa just nods a silent "Yup" to the nurse.
That was fun.
Cursive[rebelmouse-image 18350154 is_animated_gif=
When I took the SATs, they had us write that whole honesty sentence in cursive for some bizarre reason, as if that makes it somehow more legitimate than actual handwriting. I hadn't written a word in cursive in like 9 years, and couldn't remember how to write some of the wackier letters. It took me several minutes longer than anyone else to write that entire stupid sentence.
Later, one of my friends mentioned how one of his buddies had to take the SATs with this stupid kid who took forever to write a cursive sentence.
#SuitUpSunday[rebelmouse-image 18350155 is_animated_gif=
Co-worker was talking about their brother having been up skiing at my local mountain, and they apparently saw a guy snowboarding in a full suit, carrying a briefcase and sipping coffee while carving down the hill. Apparently it made for a really surreal day for them.
I informed her that the guy in the suit was me, and that I do that every Sunday at my mountain, often times as part of a whole crew of folks wearing suits. #SuitUpSunday, been at it for almost 10 years now, but this was the first time I felt like a celebrity because of it.
I'm just out there to make memories for people, so I was very happy I had succeeded.
Roommate[rebelmouse-image 18350156 is_animated_gif=
When I was in college, going into sophomore year, three friends from the dorms and I decided to get an apartment together. We lived together over the summer before moving into a different apartment in the fall. There was one girl who never paid rent, was a complete slob, ate all our food, just was awful. The worst incident came when I came home late one night and she was sleeping in my bed and peed in it on purpose when I asked her to leave, right in front of me. When we tried to have discussions with her about the mess and the money, she would flat out deny everything or just literally put her hands over her ears and say 'la la la'.
Anyway, after the bed peeing incident, we replaced her on the lease for the fall. It was over a month beforehand so she still could sign up for the dorms (or find another apartment).
So by crazy coincidence, I was at a random party in another state three years later, right after graduation. I was talking to this girl who said "Oh, you went to **university?" and started to tell me this story of her childhood friend who went there who had a terrible apartment story. In this story, three mean girls played an elaborate prank on this girl, tricking her into living with them then throwing her out to literally live on the streets. They stole her books and all sorts of s***. So I was like, oh that is really mean. Then she said,"oh here she is now," and lo and behold ...
It was my former roommate.
Some Desperate Girl[rebelmouse-image 18350157 is_animated_gif=
I once tried to flirt with a guy in college and knew the guy loved Star Wars. Said something along the lines of:
"Why don't we watch all the Star Wars movies together and then not actually watch them ????"
Needless to say, he was NOT into it, but I remained friends with the guy and we had overlapping friend groups and hung out often.
Throughout the years he suffered a few concussions due to rugby, and as a result, he often confused events and overall had a bad memory. We were out at a bar with all his friends and he starts casually talking about some desperate girl who tried to get him to come over by using Star Wars as an excuse to bang!
All his friends died with laughter.
I sat there, red as a tomato, completely mortified and not saying a word.
Near Robbery[rebelmouse-image 18350159 is_animated_gif=
When I worked at Gamestop, I was told there had been a plan by some kids to tie me up, beat and rob the place when I took out the trash one night. But my boss wouldn't let me leave for vacation tomorrow without cleaning the store. So instead of taking the trash out at 9, I got around to it at 11.
In that time, one of the other stores noticed the people waiting by the trash, called the cops and they were arrested. I was oblivious to all of this.
A month later I had moved and been promoted. On my first managers I had to learn about the new rules in place. One brand new rule was that if you were closing the store alone, you couldn't take out the trash. You had to leave it by the door for the morning. Then they told me the story of why the new rule was in place. An employee narrowly escaped possibly being murdered
No one knew it was me who had been working that night.
I Got Killed[rebelmouse-image 18350160 is_animated_gif=
I met a girl in college who started telling me about her brother's friend who had the same first name as me. Proceeded to tell me my life story (drug addiction, abusive relationship, abortion) but apparently her brother heard that I got killed.
My Crush And My Dead Dog[rebelmouse-image 18346607 is_animated_gif=
When I was in middle school, my family went on vacation. We left our dog at home and asked the son of a family friend to take care of her for the two weeks we were gone. This boy was about a year older than me and was dreamy(at least to my 7th grade eyes). I still consider him my first official crush.
Well about a week into our vacation, my dad gets a call. Our dog has been hit by a car and has passed away. Tears all around.
About a year later, I am hanging out with some girls from my class when one of them starts laughing and telling this story about how one time she went on a date with a boy and they walked this dog he was taking care of. They weren't supposed to take her downtown, but they wanted ice cream. They got so distracted making out that they didn't even notice when she ran out into the street and got hit by a car. Who was she on the date with? My crush. And my dead dog.
I've never told my family.
We all make mistakes.
It's simply human nature.
But that doesn't mean we don't often find ourselves frustrated when other people make mistakes.
Particularly if these other people are our colleagues, resulting in having to clean up the mess they created.
Redditor xk543x was curious to hear about some of the worst, or most inane mistakes made by unreliable co-workers, leading them to ask:
"What's the dumbest mistake you've seen an incompetent co worker make?"
There's a reason we keep the boys away from the girls
"At a Petco all the Guinea pigs were in a big plexiglass enclosure with a center divider."
"Boys on one side and girls on the other."
"An employee decided that all the long haired Guinea pigs should be on one side and short haired on the other."
"It took forever to sort them out and all the females were pregnant."- PumpkinsDad
"Social worker here."
"We’re supposed to see clients who live with families once a year."
"A mom of a kid kept calling her worker but got no answer."
"Mom called the on call worker who discovered the assigned worker had logged the visits in and made thorough notes."
"The mom said she never saw her in two years."
"This led to her whole caseload being audited and then they found she had logged a visit with a client who’d been dead for months."
"While being audited, her supervisor decided to do a surprise visit to the client she was supposed to see."
"She never showed up and logged in the visit the next day."- ShiroHachiRoku
Slow and steady... gets you fired
"Had a guy take a cover off the base of a radar unit which had like 40 bolts holding it on."
"Gave him a ratchet wrench to do it."
"Half hour later I go check on him, only had about 10 off. "
"Watched him a bit."
"He would take it off each time to move it for the next turn!
"Showed him how a ratchet works."
"Never assume people know stuff." - User DeletedSloth Dmv GIFGiphy
"Tried to cool down hot oil, in a chute, all ready to be emptied, with a nice big bucket of water."
"I heard 'THOMAS NO' only to turn around and see a GEYSER of hot oil shooting towards the ceiling before it hit and splashed down around him."
"Nobody was hurt some f*cking how."
"The chute that the oil was in was on wheels and had a wooden handle, it absolutely didn’t need to be cooled lol."- Ohiolongboard
How to make a bad situation even worse
"I worked on a golf course during the summer."
"Area with lots of poison ivy."
"Two of my coworkers were instructed to weedy a river edge area."
"If we encounter poison ivy, we either stop what we are doing or go get full suit protection with respirators."
"These dumba**es were weed whacking in the thickest poison ivy I had ever seen."
"No protective suit or glasses or respirator."
"I roll up and notice what the hell they're doing and point out all the poison ivy everywhere."
"They were aerosolizing the oil."
"They both ended up in the hospital on steroid to prevent their death because of the oils they inhaled."- Onwisconsin42
"30 days has September..."
"The designer, creative director and head of production all missed that there was an eight day week on a calendar."
"We sent 10000 copies of a useless calendar to a client."
"Rightly so, they refused to pay for it."- atot806animation domination calendar GIF by gifnewsGiphy
Isn't that why they call it long division?
"Not a mistake necessarily, but I once witnessed our chief accounting officer, and our only accountant; it was a small company, type in values into two Excel cells, pull out a calculator, add the two numbers together in the calculator, and then type the answer in a third cell."
"She had apparently been doing this for years, with sheets consisting of thousands of rows."
"I explained how to use formulas and copy them but she apparently forgot because I saw her doing the same thing again months later."- zachm26
Isn't that what these pockets are for?
"When I worked construction, there was a guy who showed up with nothing in his tool belt except a small bag of peanuts in one pocket."
"He didn't stay around too long."- Incredible_mangoeat season 15 GIFGiphy
Maybe a little guidance and help was all it took to put these colleagues on a better path forward.
But one imagines the only path these less-than-star employees found themselves on was right out the door.
There's nothing more embarrassing than laughing at a story someone just told, or a question someone just asked, under the assumption that they were joking.
Only to realize a few seconds later that they weren't joking.
It happens to the best of us.
In some cases, these can be bizarre stories which we might laugh about months or years down the road.
Though more often than not, we immediately feel a foot slamming into our mouth with a vengeance.
Redditor tatemalia was eager to hear the wildest, most embarrassing of these unfortunate moments, leading them to ask:
"What's your 'Oh..You're not joking' moment?"
Oh, bless your heart.
"Had an old lady ask me when her dog would grow its leg back after an amputation."- Moctor_Drignall
Don't mind if I do
"I was eating ice cream and an old guy walking into the ice cream parlor said, 'Oh, that looks good! I'm gonna get a spoon'."
"I smiled and laughed awkwardly, until his damn spoon was in my ice cream."- KnittingTrekkie
Feedback is greatly appreciated
"It was when I met up with an online friend for the first time."
"It was surprisingly more fun than I thought it would be."
"By the end of the night, as we were waiting to get served at a restaurant, she looked at me and asked how I thought our outing went."
"I told her that I had a great time."
"But that didn't seem to do it for her."
"She proceeded to tell me about how she does this thing, at the end of every outing with her friends, where she rates and gives feedback on how well it went, what didn't go so well, and what could do with some improvement for next time."
"I laughed it off, thinking she was joking."
"It all felt too robotic and school-like for me to take seriously."
"But she definitely was serious."
"I told her to go first so I could get an idea of what she wanted and, I kid you not, she whipped out her phone and started drafting up multiple paragraphs for about 7 minutes or so."
"I felt so awkward because it was also 7 minutes of pure silence and deep concentration."
"Thankfully, I had to leave mid-way because I was needed elsewhere."
"I told her to just text me her thoughts when she was done but she insisted that that wasn't the way to do it, and it HAD to be done in person."
"I still can't believe this is something her and her friends regularly do."- reigndrops17season 10 episode 22 GIFGiphy
We'll take the house, no need for a bag.
"Working in a catalog store in the UK."
"You pick from the catalog, we bring it out from the warehouse."
"Lady comes in and orders the single largest thing we keep in store."
"A shed. "
"Not a particularly big shed as sheds go, but still a shed."
"'Ok madam if you give me your vehicle's registration number I'll tell the security guys to let you round the back of the store'."
"'Park in bay five and we'll load it for you'."
"'What are you talking about?'"
"'You have to park around back so we can load it into your vehicle'."
"'I don't have a vehicle'."
"'Oh, well, we have the numbers for some white van men and taxi services if you'd like to...'"
"'No just bring it up, Keith can carry it'."
"She indicates a portly man of around 50 across the room'."
"We got it into the lift diagonally, though it trapped a man behind it, and when it came up she said 'what on earth is that?'"
"'That's your shed, madam'."
"'My Keith can't carry that!'"
"'Yeah no sh*t, would you like me to call a van service for you?'"
"She actually just got a refund and left."- reverendmalerikRace Shed GIF by CBSGiphy
That's not yours, its mine!
"I work at a hotel."
"We have this regular who comes, but usually makes reservations ahead of time, and she has her 'favorite' room she tries to get."
"Well one day she walked in, asking for a room."
"I had rooms available, but not the one she wanted, and she replied 'oh, call the guests in that room and tell them to move out so I can have it'."
"I seriously thought that was a joke and I played along, saying 'I'll get right on that,' as I was getting her info in the computer."
"All of a sudden she said, 'aren't you going to call them?'"
"'Those guests in that room so I can have it'."
"'Oh, you really weren't joking'."
"I told her that we don't do that, if she wanted that room she needed to call ahead."
"'I have a room, I know it's not your preferred room but it's all I've got, and you can take it or leave it, but I'm not moving a guest out'."
"She seemed almost taken aback by that, but I told her that if she didn't take the room I had she wouldn't get anything."
"She calls ahead now, but I was mortified and shocked she actually tried this stunt, and actually meant it."- llcucf80
What is the meaning of this?!
"Used to work at a big bank that bought out another, somewhat smaller but still pretty big bank about 10 years ago."
"Some guy came in all pissed off because we didn't send him a new debit card with the new bank's logo on it."
"They intentionally made it so the old ones would continue working until they were originally set to expire."
Said it was "'embarrassing'."
"'I can't be the only person who's gotten upset over this, right?'"
"Yeah homie, you were."- giantgooseGiphy
It's easy to understand how these poor people thought what they had just heard was a joke.
One imagines, going forward, they might wait to laugh until after the people they were talking to start laughing.
Being cheated on is a horrible feeling.
And some would say that cheating on your significant other is inexcusable.
Perhaps that's why when partners come up with excuses and reasons as to why they cheated often make these situations so much worse.
But in some cases, these excuses might end up lightening the situation, owing to the sheer idiocy of these justifications.
Redditor tall_boizz was curious to hear the lamest, most ludicrous excuses people were given from their unfaithful partners, leading them to ask:
"What is the dumbest explanation you've heard from someone who cheated?"
I saw you yesterday!
"I missed you."
"I was on a short vacation."- haynb03
It's not me, it's you
"'If you had confidence in yourself, none of this would have happened'."- marques33
Well, you did
"'I didn't want to hurt you'"
"Way to go, dude."- taalnerd
It was out of grief
“'My grandmother died'.”
"I didn’t realize cheating on your girlfriend is the standard grieving method." - User DeletedTears Crying GIFGiphy
I'm only monogamous in the city I'm in.
“'When you said you wanted to be exclusive I thought you meant exclusive here'."
"'You never even asked if I had a boyfriend'.”
"I had been 'dating' this girl for 3 months in college when she admitted that she had been in a long distance relationship with her boyfriend from high school the entire time and she had slept with him each time she visited her parents, which was at least once a month."- dring157
"'You deleted your Facebook, and my friend and I thought that was fishy'."
"I don't even know where to start with that kind of rationality."- RandylVlarsh
We were just too perfect
"'We never have any fights'."
"So you decide to cheat so I can get mad at you?"- somerandomredditor18vanessa williams GIFGiphy
“'I wanted to try something new'.”
"He cheated on me with his ex."- meeez80
Quid Pro Quo... OOPS!
"‘I thought you were doing it too!’ "
"F*ck him!"- mawo77
I had to compartmentalize
"A friend in a long-distrance relationship who only saw his GF on weekends because she was at an army posting at the other end of the country during the week."
"He found out she was cheating on him with some guy."
"'Well, for me the army and my private life are two different lives, so it makes sense I have two different boyfriends'."
"For context, I'm from Germany, this was the German army, and 'the other end of the country' was about six hours by train, the train being free for soldiers."fox broadcasting sleeping GIF by The OrvilleGiphy
When people need to dig up excuses as laughable as these, it's often because they are well aware they were in the wrong.
Hopefully, the unlucky partners of this unfaithful, motley crew can take solace in the fact that they are now much better off.
Usain Bolt's 9.58 second 100-meter dash at the 2009 IAAF World Championships.
2,019 people performing "mattress dominoes" in Rio De Janeiro in 2019.
Audra McDonald's six Tony award wins and being the only actor to win in all four acting categories.
These are only a few of the most notable, and unusual world records that have yet to be beaten.
Records some even think might never be beaten.
Redditor badblackguy7 was curious to hear what other world records people think will never be broken, leading them to ask:
"What is a record, sports or otherwise, that will likely never be broken?"
Let's hope so!
"FDR being elected US president 4 times."- holyhellnothingworks
Unbroken thanks to modern technology
"The Lion King as the highest VHS sales of all time."- Fawqueue
Once in a lifetime
"Jacque Villeneuve, Michel Schumacher and Heinz Harald Frentzen set the exact same time in qualifying in the 1997 European grand Prix."
"To the THOUSANDTH of a second."- DaBi5cu1t
Do NOT try this at home
"Oh I know this one."
"When I was a kid, we had a Guinness book of records lying around that we liked to browse in while bored."
"There was this one guy in it who held a record for most bikes eaten."
"No, you did read that right."
"He ground up a bike and slowly consumed it over I don't know how long a time."
"The record was accompanied by a note that no further records of bike eating would be accepted, as it was deemed too dangerous."- PicajosanGiphy
They made sure this will never happen again
"The longest professional tennis match of all time."
" John Isner vs Nicolas Mahut at Wimbledon 2010."
"It lasted 11 hours 5 minutes, spanning 3 days of play, with a final score of 6-4, 3-6, 6-7, 7-6, 70-68"
"It was already nearly twice as long as the previous record holder."
"The reason it will likely never be broken is that every professional tournament except for one, Roland-Garros, now has tiebreaker rules that limit the number of games that can be played in final sets."
"Although it’s hypothetically possible at RG, clay court tennis is not at all conducive to the serve-and-volley style of play that led to the insanely long 5th set of Isner-Mahut."- MSims2992
"California here I come..."
"The current record for the Cannonball Run, a drive from NY to LA, is about 25.5 hours."
"It was set in May of 2020, and the drivers were able to make use of the lack of traffic due to the pandemic to break the record."
"Barring another similar world changing event, traffic conditions will probably never be what they were when that record was set."- SexyNeanderthal
Any other challengers?
"887 wins to 2 losses."
"Entered 9 world championships and never lost a bout in them."- minorboozerLoop Spinning GIF by WWEGiphy
Winning is just showing up.
"Glenn Hall played 502 consecutive games as an NHL goalie."
"Zero chance that will ever be broken, goalies these days rarely play more than 3/4 of an 82-game season, let alone numerous seasons without a night off."- ButtholeQuiver
"Surprised no one mentioned the unlimited water speed record."
"The current unlimited record is 511.11 km/h (317.59 mph)."
"Achieved by Australian Ken Warby in the Spirit of Australia in 1978."
"It hasn’t been broken to this day due to how dangerous it is to go at those sort of speeds on the surface and plenty of people have passed away trying."- Sliiated
"I'll be waiting, waiting for you..."
"The longest non consecutive billboard 200 album streak belongs to none other than, The Dark Side Of the Moon by Pink Floyd."
"It currently has been on the chart for 962 weeks."
"Second in line is Legend, by Bob Marley and the Wailers, at 733 weeks, meaning Marley and the wailers would need almost 4.5 years of time on the charts, with Floyd being absent, in order to take the number one spot."- Floyd-Van-Zeppelinmoving pink floyd GIFGiphy
There is a likely chance that these records will never, in fact, never be broken.
But one has little doubt that people will continue to try.
And power to anyone attempting to sell more video cassettes than The Lion King.