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People Reveal The Funniest Thing A Stranger Has Ever Said To Them

You are too much!

The things we hear in an ordinary moment can change the course of our lives. When we pretend we're not listening and we really are.... well that is the most exciting part of a lot days. The conversations from strangers are beyond fascinating, It's like a tangible soap opera. Sadly we have to follow strangers home to know how it ends... which isn't impossible.

Redditor u/Eta5678 wanted all the strangers out there to discuss their encounters.... Reddit, whats the funniest thing that a random stranger said to you that made you die laughing inside?


Sag away....

I was helping a customer pick out a new bra and she said she wanted her breasts to be lifted. She said, "my boobs are so saggy that if my nipples were eyeballs, I'd be able to see if my shoes were untied."

I really tried my best to remain professional but I couldn't stop laughing lol. BurkaBurrito

I'm Listening! 

I was in the drive thru of a Wendy's one time. An employee exited the building with his headphones on and was singing Who Let The Dogs Out at the top of his lungs. He saw me, stopped singing, and started walking away. A few seconds later he come up to my window and said, "yes, that is what I'm listening to." Then he walked away. I laughed so hard at the whole situation. JonoTheDog

To Hell and Back! 

Okay, the laughter was not entirely inside, but years ago on the subway in NY, a crazy dude walks on the train and screams at everyone "You're all going to hell!" and then steps off as the doors close. Total silence as the weirdness of the moment settles in. Then, without missing a beat, guy across from me goes, "I thought this train was going to Harlem." Entire subway car of cynical New Yorkers bursts out laughing. jimcol

I hate socks... 

I must've been about 10 or 11. I sat down on a bench next to an old guy to sort my shoe out. I took my shoe off and he just turns to me and says "are they golfing socks?" I look at him with a completely blank look on my face thinking "wtf??" as I looked away he just said "there's a hole in one." WinningToad

Dollars Away....

Giphy

Was leaving Walmart and the 80ish year old greeter says "Thanks for shopping at Dollar Tree!"brookski_lee

I Smell That!

Movie just ended, me and my dad join the mad rush to to the bathrooms, urinals are packed, its our turn we doing our business, suddenly someone rips a hugggge fart, lol its pretty funny but we all have manners, still peeing, suddenly this dude proclaims, "IT WAS MEEEEE" and runs out the door. Whole bathroom erupts in laughter. dodo_gogo

AAYO!

A few years ago I let my friend cut my hair... it did not go well.

I was living in Philadelphia at the time and was walking through South Philly when I passed two strangers in the middle of the conversation. As I pass, one of them says to the other: "Hold up, I gotta talk to this guy." He precedes to shout to me: "Aaayo! Your hair looks like S**T. Come over here."


I was amused, partially because of his bluntness and partially because he wasn't wrong. I was curious, so I walked over to him. He says: "Look, a buddy of mine owns a barber shop two blocks away. Here's his business card--I'll write my name on there, if you mention that I sent you he'll give you a good deal. Bruh, but seriously take care of that s**t."

I never ended up going to his friend's shop, but I frequently use this story as the perfect example of Philly culture: rude, blunt & in your face yet somehow coming from a place of genuine care. Plus, it's hilarious. trustfundbabelfish

Hysteria! 

May of 2000, passing through Norwood Louisiana with a friend, at around 2 in the afternoon we stopped to gas up/grab some snacks at the most podunk gas station known to man.

A young man, extremely agitated comes in with frustrated gestures and angrily shouts/gestures at the cashier with an accent that is beyond region, beyond stereotyping, beyond anything I have heard before:

"Where da' got damned wally-mellyons at!!" at the top of lungs, approaching hysteria and tears. official_fox_news

Beep-Beep! 

A few months ago I was waiting at a road crossing with loads of other strangers, waiting for the man to turn green. This was a busy main road in my city.

A little girl on the other side of the road did THE MOST ACCURATE IMPRESSION of the 'beep beep' that the crossing makes so blind people know it's safe to cross, and the entire crowd of people just stepped into the road. I had seen her do it, so I stayed put, but I couldn't stop laughing. My girlfriend was confused.

50 adults pranked by one absolute genius 6ish year old. It was magical. kingbluetit

Peace First....

Giphy

Met a guy while camping a few years ago. He told us, matter of factly, that he was a "Redneck hippie" back in the 60's.. He was "there for the sex and the drugs, but not so much that love and peace stuff." We still crack up about that. PursuitOfMuchness

Yep! 

I work in retail, and I'm not sure why, but this had me dying for a while. I still laugh when I think about it.

Me: "How you doing today, sir?"

Customer: "Yep."

And he went on his way. RiSET0FaLL

Peace Brother! 

Met a guy while camping a few years ago. He told us, matter of factly, that he was a "Redneck hippie" back in the 60's.. He was "there for the sex and the drugs, but not so much that love and peace crap." We still crack up about that. PursuitOfMuchness

WOOF!

Giphy

An old man on the street with a big, jack-o-lantern grin on his face and two Chihuahuas under each arm loudly proclaiming to no one in particular, "I used to carry grenades! Now I carry dogs!" NightOnTheSun

Smells like pee...

Worked at a smoke shop that sold electronic cigarettes years ago. A customer came in complaining that the new flavor made her pee smell funny. I couldn't keep a straight face when I said I wasn't sure if that was related. Then she says, "Oh, well it could be an STD or something I guess...Thanks!" and walked out. oppapi666

Off with your leg! 

The time I was waiting for takeout and the amputee owner struck up a convo. "My friend, you have to be really careful if you ever get shot in the knee or any leg bone. They don't warn you that you can't have sex for months. One night you're taking home a beautiful girl to show her your scars and the next morning your leg's gone." walnut100

Flames! On the side of my face!

Giphy

When i was about 8 yrs old (40 some odd yrs ago) my mother and i were waiting to be seated at a restaurant, and an older gentleman was ahead of us also waiting. The waitress asked him if he'd be smoking (back when that was still a thing in restaurants), and he replied "no, but i may burst into flames later." Young me laughed all through lunch at that, in fact it still makes me giggle lol. SweetBabyJesus99

Help the blind....

Giphy

Something I overheard as two kids walked past our caravan park site: A rumbling boom of distant thunder.

Kid 1: "I like thunder. It sounds like a 200 year old dog who's retired and helps old people who are blind to get around."

Kid 2: (silence)

Kid 1: "You know?"

Kid 2: "But why is it retired?"

Kid 1: "Because it's old."

Kid 2: "But it's still helping blind people."

Kid 1: (silence) actualchad

Hot Pants! 

When I was a freshmen in college I had a pair of rainbow bellbottoms I made and wore a lot. I walking through the city back to the dorms when a guy rode up behind me on a bicycle. He was old, had long, scraggly gray hair and a bright red and yellow windsuit on. He rode beside me for a second, stared and then yelled "Miss your pants are hot....HWAAAAT" and the rode away into the sunset. It was so random and hilarious. Every time I wore those pants my friends would run up behind me and yell "Your pants are HWAT" -StarrySky-

Damn Crabs....

No so much said to me as overheard. Walking down the street with my fianceè after dinner, a man and woman pass us. Very clearly I heard the man say:

"... and that's the second time I got crabs. I just keep a special little comb at the house now, just in case."

I'm not sure of any particulars and have thought about that interaction often. So many questions, I know they heard me laugh though. kbig22432

Suck it Down!

Giphy

I used to be a smoker. One time a scruffy looking man asked me for a light. I told him I only had matches. (It was very windy) He said, "that's ok, there's a trick to it. You light the match and then suck down real hard. You get a mouth full of sulfur that way, but you gotta have a trick when you're going thirty miles an hour on top of a tank."emken23

REDDIT

People Explain Which Red Flags They Don't Mind In A Potential Partner

"Reddit user Cerseiriously asked: 'What’s a red flag you don’t mind so much in a potential SO?'"

A young man stands on a hill and waves a smoke signal
Photo by Chinh Le Duc

Nobody is perfect.

That is lesson number one when looking for love.

No one person is going to check off every box.

So that means that every red flag or warning is not life-altering.

That is called compromise.

But as long as they aren't buying bodies and storing organs... there is a lot that people can handle.

Redditor Cerseiriously wanted to hear about what warning signs people can live with when courting romance, so they asked:

"What’s a red flag you don’t mind so much in a potential SO?"

I can handle cheap.

Well, frugal.

Cheap to waiters? No.

But frugal for the future? Yes.

I Get It

Stop Motion Yes GIF by MouseGiphy

"Someone who isn't close to their own family. I'm not close with mine, either. I'd actually think it was refreshing to be with someone who understood and felt the same way."

JoeyTepes

Can't Commit

"A certain type of dating history. Everyone has their own style of dating. For example, Person A has a history of 3-4 year LTR but has never married while Person B doesn't have any relationships beyond 6 months. Person A thinks it's a red flag that Person B 'can't commit' when the reality is they simply end a relationship they don't see going long-term."

"On the other side, Person B thinks it is Person A who can't commit based on the fact they have years-long relationships but don't progress. It's all relative to how you compare the person's history to your own style of dating."

FunctionCreepy2096

As an older person...

"Not having a lot of prior relationships (as an older person). When I met my husband, he was 34 and had had only one serious relationship up until that point which was 15 years prior."

"Now I know a lot of people would see that as a waving red flag and think there was something 'wrong' with him, but the reality was he was in a male-heavy specialty (engineering college to an engineering job), had a job where he traveled about 90% of the time and, when I met him, had just moved back to the area where he had grown up after being away for over 10 years."

"None of that was conducive to meeting people or a relationship and, beyond that, he's not a particularly social person or someone who really revels in the company of others, which didn't help."

"We met online, we clicked, we started dating, we got married 2 years later, and are still married 18 years later."

Sniffy73

In Person

"Not being very communicative or chatty through text. Some people simply aren’t into texting. I dated a guy who was like that. At first, I took his lack of communication and short answers as not being interested… when in reality, he simply wasn’t much of a texter. I just accepted that’s how he was. In person he was great."

sweet_dream515

Dear Mama

Hocus Pocus Halloween GIFGiphy

"'How a man treats his mother is a sign of how he'll treat you so be careful.'"

"Or if he dislikes his mom, doesn't want to help her, be there for her, talks bad about her. It could be because she's horrible and it's just a sign of how she treated him."

Prestigious-Phase131

Oh the mommy issues never end,

Love her. Hate her.

It'll all get covered in therapy.

The Socials

Social Media Facebook GIFGiphy

"I’ve been told my lack of social media is a major turn-off and a major red flag. But I find a guy that doesn’t have any social media or very little attractive. It’s all about perspective."

asterbluesapphire

I blame all the Wattpad stories...

"I don't mind some mild (MILD) possessiveness. In fact, I think it's kind of hot. I blame all the Wattpad stories I consumed during my formative years."

_hootyowlscissors

"Same! My husband and I joke that we're both stage 5 clingers to each other 😂 not really that bad as we don't control each other but we're best friends, have all the same hobbies, and love spending all of our free time together. There's nothing better than a hard day's work and coming home to someone who is excited to see you, even if it's just a Monday."

Buffyfanatic1

No Mingle

"Someone who’s been single for a long time! I find jumping from partner to partner more concerning. Some people never figure out who they are on their own."

geminibaby

"You just described me, I got to a point where I am not just going to jump into a relationship with someone not compatible like I used to do before I knew who I was, I’d rather be single, but when people find out how long I’ve been single they think it’s a massive red flag."

Just_improvise

Tell Me More

"Absorbed in their hobbies/their work. I love that. Go buck wild, even if it’s obsessive. Also because bruh I have a terrible rest/production ratio. I need someone who understands. LOL."

Probablyawerewolf

"I see you've met my partner. Well, he's a grad student, so he doesn't have much of a choice in his workoholism. I'm trying to get him to balance it out a little bit, but I love his passion. He could spend hours telling me about his research, about a conference, or just about a paper he read once, and I love listening to that."

smallangrynerd

Let Go

friends cling GIF by Nick At NiteGiphy

"Clinginess. I like it when she always wants to be around me and up under me."

​FruitSnackEater

Cling. In love. Dependent. Co-Dependent. In love.

Is there really a difference?

Person taking picture of the clouds from their seat on flight
Photo by Leo on Unsplash

For some people, flying is the epitome of great travel and adventure. The thought of entering the air is exhilarating.

For others, however, flying is to be avoided unless totally necessary. There's an underwater highway connecting the continents, right? Or an impossibly strong bridge?

But as laughable as it might seem to see someone dread flying, sometimes there's a key experience that can explain all of those negative feelings they have connected to buckling up and locking their tray tables.

Curious about others' experiences, Redditor prettyKaitlynn asked:

"What's the most horrifying thing you've experienced on a flight?"

The Sudden Loss of a Loved One

"On a red-eye flight, everyone was asleep, but I can't sleep on planes. A few rows behind me, a girl started screaming, 'Mama!? MAMA!?'"

"The flight attendants walked over and then ran back. Then ran over holding a defibrillator. Then they walked the hysterical girl, who looked to be about a teenager, to the front of the plane. Then they walked back with blankets."

"When the plane landed, no one was allowed to move. A stretcher came on board and wheeled the blanket-covered body out. The sobbing girl followed behind."

"I can't imagine losing a parent on a flight, with nowhere to go and no way to contact anyone else for help, surrounded by nosy strangers in tight quarters."

- KnittinAndB***hin

"Oh my god, that poor girl. I traveled a lot with my mom when I was her age, visiting my big brother at college. I can’t even imagine the horror of this situation and how traumatic that must have been. I hope she is happy and thriving somewhere now…"

- doodle_d**ks3000

Fallen Flight 4184

"On Halloween night in 1994, I was on a United flight from Vancouver to Chicago."

"Back then, 'Channel 9' on the inflight entertainment system let you listen to air traffic control. That night as we approached Chicago, I was listening to Channel 9 when suddenly ATC told all the other planes to quiet down."

"Then they started calling over and over for another flight, American 4184, and asking the other planes if anyone else could see an ATR."

"This went on for a few minutes and then, CLICK, channel 9 was switched off. I felt a chill go down my spine."

"When I got to my hotel, I switched on CNN."

"Flight 4184 had gone down in a field in Indiana and everyone was dead."

- CohibaVancouver

Worthy of 'Final Destination'

​"Just after takeoff from Ixtapa Mexico, we were climbing out over the ocean at about 1000 feet when I looked out my window. Headed directly at me about 500 feet away was a twin-engine Beechcraft (I think). I would guess it was three to four seconds from impact."

"Fortunately, the pilot of the aircraft saw us and pulled up sharply just in time, missing us by maybe 25 feet."

"My wife, who's deathly afraid of flying, asked me, 'What was that?' I said, 'Nothing,' and pretended nothing had happened until we were on the ground in the US, and then I told her."

"Without question, if that pilot had pulled up even a second or two later, everyone on board both planes would have been dead."

- lobeams

Fear of Flying

"As soon as the engines revved up for take-off, a woman started screaming like she was dying."

"The flight attendants couldn’t get up to go to her until the pilot rang the bell, about five to ten minutes. She was screaming the entire time."

"Turns out her daughter put her on the flight even though she was terrified of flying. An attendant held her hand the entire flight, walked her all the way to meet the other daughter, and told her to never put mom on an airplane ever again."

- zenos_dog

"Just so everyone knows, if you are afraid of flying, tell the stewards when getting on the plane."

"They will make sure you are checked in and will pay special attention to you to make it easier."

- DeezNeezuts

What Dreams Are Made Of

"Flying out of Chengdu China in the early 80s on an old Russian turboprop, It was a wicked snowstorm, and I thought there was no way we were taking off in that mess. Visibility was only a few hundred feet."

"I looked around in panic and I realized the guy sitting across the aisle from me was the spitting image of Buddy Holly. I recall thinking that if this guy pulled a guitar out of the overhead bin and started singing 'Peggy Sue,' we were all f**ked."

- WeekendDesigner4734

"Oh sweet, you're a Steven King character."

- moslof_flosom

Allergic to... Flying?

"This was in 2015 (luckily not during the pandemic as I probably would have been kicked off the flight). But suddenly I felt a tickle in my throat, so I started coughing."

"But I COULD NOT STOP COUGHING. No matter what I did, I could not get that tickle out. The people around me were understanding, but I decided to go to the back of the plane just to be courteous."

"The flight attendants gave me ice and that was the only thing that would give me any sort of relief."

"We finally landed. That night, I went to bed and woke up at 5:00 AM with a swollen shut eye, huge f**king lips, hives ALL over my body, and a tightness in my chest."

"Turns out I was having a severe allergic reaction to something I ate (?) at the airport or something on the plane. My throat was literally CLOSING on the plane. That’s why the ice was helping because it was bringing down the swelling."

"But here’s the weird f**king thing. I’ve never been allergic to anything in my life before OR since that incident. So it’s a huge freaking mystery. The hives also showed up in different places on my body each morning for two weeks after."

- TheReinsOfFullNight

Take Off Mysteries

"On a flight from San Francisco to Denver. The plane was loaded and it was time to take off, but we just sat at the gate. The pilot announced we would be leaving soon and that we were late taking off because they had to balance out the luggage."

"Finally around 30 minutes after we were supposed to take off, the plane backed out and went to the runway. Once again, we just sat on the tarmac, this time for another 30 minutes. The pilot got on the PA again and said we had to return to the gate because the plane was low on fuel from all the idling."

"Back at the gate, three armed law enforcement officers entered the plane and escorted a man off. After that, the pilot announced that we were finally ready to take off and that the previous wait was actually due to a security issue."

- TXRichardCranium

Unforgettable Turbulence

"Just (but didn’t feel like 'just' at the time) really bad turbulence; people’s purses hit the ceiling of the cabin and I think some people who weren’t belted in injured themselves too. People were screaming, praying, and crying (I was in that last category)."

"I wasn’t crazy about flying before, but that experience put me into phobia territory and I didn’t fly after that for probably about ten years, and still weigh it as a cost-to-benefit thing whenever I travel. It’s helped a bit to learn that turbulence isn’t really a thing that causes plane crashes, as far as I now understand, but it can feel very different in that moment to the illogical mind."

- bottleglitch

Oh, the Humanity

"On an airplane, but not technically a flight."

"Sitting at the end of the runway, the pilot was doing his pre-flight or something. There was a fireball in one of the engines. Passengers panicked, flight attendants popped the emergency doors, and the emergency slides deployed."

"It was mayhem; people knocking others down, crawling over the seats, lots of screaming. Several people were injured."

"Of those I saw, one man fell off the wing; I found out later he broke his arm and collarbone. Another fell off the middle of the slide. She went away holding her wrist, not sure of what happened. The guy in front of me on the slide tumbled face-first at the bottom of the slide, and got up with a bloodied face."

"Emergency slides are not fun. It's not like in the movies."

"The ironic thing was, there was no danger to the aircraft or passengers."

- chileheadd

Not a Question You Want to Hear

"The scariest thing was being asked by the guy on the other side of the plane if there was oil spraying out of the engine on my side, too."

- cablemonkey604

Happily Ever After

"We took off after a seven-hour delay. The plane climbed for a little bit and went into a pretty tight bank turn."

"The Captain came on and said there was smoke in the cabin, and we were going in for an emergency landing. As we were coming in, there were the fire trucks and emergency vehicles waiting for us."

"Long story short... it was a wiring harness for the coffee maker. They swapped it out without even having to deplane. We got free drinks for the rest of the flight."

- Bigkid6666

No Small Talk Welcome

"We barely had our butts in the seat and a woman turned to us and said, 'Are you two teachers?' as an icebreaker."

"We responded with 'no,' and then she said, well, she was a teacher, and she then proceeded to talk THE ENTIRE nine-hour flight about herself."

"My husband pretended to fall asleep within the hour, and I find it painfully hard to stop conversations with friendly people, so all I could do was listen to her ramble."

"Ugh, AND we were seated right beside the toilets which smelt of old pee."

- No-Lack4969

"That would be my personal h**l. Just let me read my book, lady."

- Ninyu

Chaos Ensues

"Captain here. Two hours in on an early flight, and the in-charge Flight Attendant advises us we have run out of coffee."

- scooterjay2013

A Strange Turn of Events

"I had a woman next to me on a 15-hour flight, with two kids under the age of five. She sat next to me with the kids on the aisle, and the first thing she did was apologize for what was to come."

"It was terrible, stuff constantly knocked onto the floor, a drink spilled on my leg... but that was just the woman herself."

"She soon swapped seats, and the kids just did normal kid stuff. They were not so bad at all, aside from the occasional accidental bump when they squirmed, while she continued to drop stuff on the floor: food, drink, phone, basically anything on her tray table was going to be on the floor sooner or later."

- FrightenedOfSpoons

"This weirdly sounds like something out of a rom-com."

"Her: 'I'm sorry for the trouble that will be caused.'"

"Him: 'I understand, kids will be kids.'"

"'No, I mean me, I'm a super klutz when flying.'"

"Strangers to Lovers. Annoyance softens to Endearment."

"Instant love story."

- saruhime

A Fuzzy Passenger

"Flying in a small eight-seater from the mainland to an island, a kitten got loose, climbed over the pilot's shoulder, and generally was frantic."

"That's the type of scene that disaster movies start with!"

- GSVNoFixedAbode

"Something similar happened on a flight. It was kind of funny, though, because the pilot got on the P.A. to ask whoever was missing a kitten to please come to retrieve it, in a very official, somewhat annoyed, pilot-ey voice. Pure comedy."

- ljuko

While some of these stories were amusing in the end, most of these were absolutely chilling, and it's no wonder that these Redditors don't enjoy flying or refuse to travel by airplane ever again.

It's pretty safe to say, honestly, that most of us would choose the same thing if we experienced something like this.

Woman grabbing her lower back as if in pain
Sasun Bughdaryan/Unsplash

"Sex is not fun," said nobody ever.

Let's face it: giving in to our primal urges and engaging in various forms of sex is a natural way of having fun and enjoying our bodies.

Until something goes wrong in the heat of the moment.

People don't think about it, but the truth is, sex and pain are not mutually exclusive.

But pain is not a typically the desired outcome.

Strangers online shared their experiences that didn't lead to a happy ending when Redditor Kurkil asked:

"Have you ever had a sex injury? If so, what happened?"

People made surprising discoveries after the fact.

Accessory To Pain

"After bar in a pretty aggressive makeout session. Something felt weird so I excused myself to the restroom. Looked in the mirror and saw that her hoop earring had impaled my cheek and was just dangling off the side of my face."

"Pulled it out, swabbed some rubbing alcohol on it, and got back to business. It was super weird because there was literally no pain at all. Like it must've missed every nerve ending"

– ManBroCalrissian

Upon Oral Examination

"I have 'jaw and throat sprain from vigorous oral sex' in my medical record.....I went to emergency thinking I had mumps. I did not."

– elletee80

People got more than they bargained for while getting some action.

What The Buck

"I once dislocated my shoulder while going down on my girlfriend. I had my arms under her legs and she jerked one leg suddenly, hitting my upper arm and dislocating it."

"In the emergency room, the person doing intake listened to our story and said 'I’m going to put down "horseplay" to which my girlfriend replied, 'what am I, a horse?'”

– avec_serif

Literally Mind-Blowing

"Pretty standard: bent the pole between thrusts."

"Pretty rare: During a BJ I got Transient Global Amnesia (TGA) which caused me to lose the previous 48 hours. It can be triggered by orgasm and it was scary AF. Forgot how I got where I was, where I was going, who I was meeting. I remembered my name, address, family etc but had no idea what day of the week it was... it all came back after 24 hours with the exception of a 20min period."

– haylofx

Bigger Isn't Always Better

"When I was single and dating around, thoroughly enjoying my divorce, I would chat with my female friends about my encounters with men. It wasn't a secret that I prefer them big. Then one day, I met this guy who was gorgeous, smart, funny, great kisser, EVERYTHING I could have ever asked for! We go to the bedroom, his unir is too big. It was painful. Tried it again a few weeks later, because your cervix changes during certain times of your cycle. Still doesn't fit. Had to say goodbye to that one..."

– Dependent_Top_4425

Aggressive Pole-Rider

"Bent my unit in half to the point I screamed and rolled over."

"Next day she showed up with an ice cream cake saying 'sorry I broke your d*ck written on it.'"

"Said the guy at dairy queen lost his sh*t while writing it."

– Spenraw

Miscalculation

"Went to flip over onto my back for missionary, overestimated how much bed was there, fell off the side and slashed my back on the edge of the dresser."

– cheeezus_crust

Beware of liquids.

The Ole Switcheroo

"Not mine but a friend. Hand sanitizer and lube in similar containers near the bed resulted in a sanitized vagina."

– lopaco93

Effects Of Alcohol

"Not an injury per se, but we had to stop and I had to run to the shower immediately."

"We had both been drinking and decided to move it into the bedroom. I was on top. We were both super into it and I grabbed the bottle of whiskey and took a big swig straight from the bottle. He thought it was hot and decided he wanted to do a shot off my body... he missed some, and it continued down... I was really into what was happening, so it took a second for the pain to register."

"Holy sh*t, that burned. I hopped off of him, explaining that I felt like I had been set on fire, and ran to the shower to hose off."

"Lesson learned - whiskey does not belong anywhere near there."

"Still one of my favorite sex fail stories."

– Katemonster89

Lesson Learned

"I learned the hard way never to got eat hot wings and then go down on your date. I thought I was doing a good job, I got a black eye from her heel from it 🤦♂️"

– houseDJ1042

Safe sex is important.

But no one ever thought that would ever extend beyond protecting oneself from getting STDs.

Let's just say an emergency trip to the hospital can come with quite the story.

black and yellow poison sign

Mikael Seegen on Unsplash

There are things on Earth that are clearly dangerous: flash floods, wildfires, tornados, hurricanes, Australia...

But there are also things that people think are completely safe that can be deadly.

Sometimes it's because of the appearance of the dangerous thing. Humans tend to trust cute and cuddly looking fauna and beautiful flora.

Looks can be deceiving though.

Keep reading...Show less