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People Share Their Funniest 'I'm Embarrassed To Even Know You' Experiences

People Share Their Funniest 'I'm Embarrassed To Even Know You' Experiences
J Taubitz on Unsplash

We'd like to think that we're a good judge of character evidenced by the good friendships we all have.

But when a friend or even a family member does or says something that proves us wrong about our opinion of them, it can make us embarrassed just knowing them.

Curious to hear examples of when people were way off about someone they thought they knew, Redditor AlyksTheSage asked:

"What's something a friend or family member said/did that made you think 'I'm embarrassed that I even know you?'"

These former friends put on quite a display at food establishments.

Having A Conniption Fit

"An ex-friend threw a temper tantrum in a Jack-in-the-Box because the cashier got her order wrong. Talking stamping her feet, gesturing with her arms, pouting, temper tantrum."

"She was 23 at the time."

"We are no longer friends."

– Eezez

Meltdown At Chipotle

"Last week my fiancee's coworker decided to 'skip the line' by ordering grubhub from the line. This was a Chipotle."

"She ordered maybe 7/8 people back, and then proceeded to stay in the line with all of us saying 'i'm just picking up' to everyone who asked what she wanted and would have made it in front of her."

"When she got to the cashier and gave her the info, the cashier was like 'oh ok, well, it will be ready in ten minutes' because f'king obviously."

"She flipped out. Like absolutely lost her sh*t, called everyone names, did the absolute 'dependapotomous' (spelling, I'm not military, sorry) thing where she started shouting about how she was a military spouse and 'when she orders, you make the f'king food'."

"She proceeded to break the phone out, start filming, and continue screaming at people for disrespecting a veteran that way. Again, I am f'king shocked I haven't seen this online yet."

"So how things round out, is they finish her order and the manager brings it to her, thanks her for her husband's service, and tells her she needs to leave and he'd appreciate it if she never came back."

"Her response was 'I don't like your f'king wetback food anyway.'"

"I had driven my fiancee and this woman to this chipotle, and I had to drive this total douche canoe home from this Chipotle."

"It was total silence other than her texting furiously, and occasionally huffing and puffing, until we got about a block from her house and I didn't feel like making a difficult left and told her to just get the f'k out of my car."

"Easily the stupidest, worst person I've had to engage with to that degree since High School. Like, f'k politics: Who raised you?"

– iph0ne

Racist Coworker

"When I went for sushi with some coworkers and the one dude I convinced to come because I thought he was cool just asked for french fries and sat there and pouted because he didn't want to eat 'all this gay jap food' quote."

"Why the f'k did he come then? never been so disappointed in someone. dinner with coworkers is always risky. made the entire thing awkward as f'k."

– grass-snake-40

Some Redditors wished they were not related to these family members.

The Last Straw

"I have an uncle that’s loud, willfully ignorant, and has used temper tantrums and unpleasant behavior to get his way his whole life. He’s like the villain in a bad teen novel."

"The last straw for me was when my grandparents passed away. He tried to steal everything from his siblings. When my mother stood up to him he threatened to kill her."

"I’d really like to believe there was a mixup at the hospital when he was born and that we aren’t really related."

– Fromanderson

Out Of Line Questioning

"My aunt asked someone 'aren't you too old to be pregnant?' The lady was in her 40's and NOT pregnant."

– Pastafarian_Pirate

Bad Bar Behavior

"A family member got banned from a local pub for spitting peanuts at someone with an allergy..... like just why, just no."

– soydinosaur

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Have you ever worked one of those jobs that paid you to kinda sit there? If you have, you know the joy that comes with watching the entirety of Breaking Bad ...

Mom's A Racist

"My mom and I were debating racism and I told her that she's racist. Her response:"

"I'm not racist, I just think all black people should go back to Africa."

– KeepYourDemonsIn

"Have an aunt that I’m embarrassed to share blood with (dad’s sister). She’s an LVN and last year she faked 'being deployed' to Afghanistan to help with the Covid relief. She’d post pics on Facebook (she’s addicted to social media and photoshop) from other old news articles claiming she was in them and would brag to the whole family that she got to go on missions because she was the only one 'skinny enough' to fit in the helicopter."

"She was gone on this alleged deployment for 2 weeks before coming back but turns out she was somewhere at a hotel cheating on her husband again. She went to Mexico with a cousin of mine to get gastric bypass (no judgment there) but denies she got surgery and claims it just her amazing will power that caused her weight loss (she wasn’t overweight to begin with)."

"The cousin she went with was open about it and we were all concerned because she got really sick from it for a while. She was hospitalized for it and even when she got out, she denied getting it (which we couldn’t care less but it was still pretty bizarre)."

"She’s also faked cancer multiple times,and is currently harassing a now ex-wife of a man (both were family friends) she was caught cheating on with and sending her multiple threats on different burner phones claiming to be different brothers and sisters of my dad to make her feel unwelcome and ganged up on."

"Turns out, my aunt just didn’t want her near our family because she concerned about what all she knows and if she’ll tell us."

– Ally-2016

Some people's delusions are so wild, it's embarrassing to know them.

History Denier

"A friend that argued that Pompeii wasn´t real and the remains that they found were just props."

"They said it was staged so people will get away from God because if they thought people died like that they would think God was evil."

– No-Cupcake888

Eating Denier

"Roommate walked into the room and told me my food looked good."

"I didn't have any food."

"It was his food that he had been eating before he left the room for less than 10 minutes. I told him that, and he didn't believe me."

– Leelluu

The Forecast Got Ugly

"My brother tried to argue that the weather is racist because it snows more where White people live."

– lllSnowmanlll

Fake Holocaust

"My sister is convinced the Holocaust is a hoax and that people weren’t actually murdered in gas chambers."

– Hardnipples0

Celestial Hoax

"My ex boyfriend said that the sun and moon are government projections and he was extremely upset when I told him that he’s crazy."

"He said I was ignorant lol. Pretty wild conclusions."

– lurkingherkin69

I'm proud to say, I'm a pretty good judge of character and I surround myself with good people.

I can't imagine being embarrassed knowing anyone since many of my friends–in spite of minor character flaws–all have redemptive values that far outweigh their shortcomings.

As to what they may think of me, well, I know I've embarrassed my friends and family on many occasions.

Thankfully, they've all decided to keep me around.

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People Share Their Very Specific Dating Restrictions

Reddit user AceofSpadesYT asked: 'What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?'

silhouette photography of couple
Sean Stratton on Unsplash

When it comes to dating, I have my mental checklist. The guy must be kind, intelligent, funny, and a movie buff. He must be adventurous but also doesn't mind a Netflix and Chill date night.

Most of this is similar to the mental checklists other people have. Of course, I can be flexible. If someone is nice and I'm having fun with them, they don't necessarily have to check all the boxes.

However, I have one specific dating restriction that is a dealbreaker regardless of how many boxes the person checks, and that's religion. I've never been a fan, and now I'm an atheist, and I would want my partner to be as well. That's because I want kids, and the last thing I want is for us to argue about how to raise the kids when it comes to religion.

I'm not the only person who has one specific dating restriction. Everyone has that one thing that is a dealbreaker when it comes to a romantic relationship. Redditors certainly do, and they are ready to share.

It all started when Redditor AceofSpadesYT asked:

"What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?"

It's Just A Joke!

"No cruel or rude pranks."

– detective_kiara

"I saw a post by someone whose boyfriend "pranked" her by pretending to be dead on the kitchen floor. That is exactly how she had found her previous partner, dead on the kitchen floor, which her current boyfriend knew. He was surprised she dumped him and didn't think it was funny."

– innocuousspeculation

We're (Not) Gonna Party!

"No party people. Nothing wrong with it, I just ain't dealing with that sh*t."

– PlantBasedStangl

"True. I like planning weekend stuff, but it has to be something meaningful - visiting a different city, movie marathon, mountain hike, fancy lunch, all okay. But... clubbing and drinking? How f**king old are we, 19? No thank you, I'm old and have no energy for listening to music I don't like while being surrounded by 50 people that I don't give a single half of a sh*t about."

– PlantBasedStangl

LOL

"Same sense of humor. I have 0 interest sharing physical space with someone who doesn't laugh with me."

– Legendary_Lamb2020

My Ears Are Bleeding!

"I'm a light sleeper. I cannot date a snorer. I can hear snores through ear plugs AND a fan blowing. It's not you, it's me."

– YourLocalOrca

At that point, it does sound like them 😂

– CuriousRedditor98

Funemployed

"Have a f**king job."

– Cuss-Mustard

"Found this difficult when I was funemployed. Was fortunate enough to be able to live off savings for a bit."

"People reacted oddly to it. “But what do you do???”"

"Was dating at the same time and some girls had the same sentiment. “You don’t have a job?”"

"I had a good enough job that I didn’t need one anymore. And one lined up 8 months from then. But there were two girls specifically who treated it as a deal breaker."

– DigNitty

"I had a similar situation. I worked a high-paying job for a few years that demanded a ton of my time and had crazy hours. It burnt me out badly and I lived off of the savings from that job for a while and tried to date now that I actually had free time. I had more money in my bank account during that time than at any other point in my life but so many people were put off by me being funemployed and assumed I was looking to leech. But I guess there’s really no way to know someone's history and hard not to assume. Now I work full-time and have way less money overall but it looks better..."

– Pinsit

Just Breathe

"No smoking. Ever. I'm not kissing an ashtray, or smelling an ashtray. Instant turn off."

–fishfood19

"100% I broke up with an old gf because she started smoking behind my back knowing I’ve got asthma and it was always a hard pass. She thought I was joking but it showed me that she was also untrustworthy."

– Jonowl89

That'll Do It

"I guess my husband restricts my dating."

– HeinousEncephalon

"My wife has the same rule. But the jokes on her, I get around it by dating her!"

– AuralRapist

Prehistoric Love

"Must like dinosaurs."

– Grungeceratops

"That goes without saying."

– Plain_Chacalaca

What's In A Name?

"Cannot have the same name as any of my relatives."

– Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

"My last ex had the same name as my Dad and I reeeeeeaally didn't like it. So, fair."

– severaltalkingducks

Be Polite

"If they’re rude to people they’ll never see again (Waitstaff, cashiers, etc) I’m out."

"I can’t respect anyone who doesn’t respect themselves, and when you’re not polite to people you’re disrespecting yourself."

– OctopusCandleCompany

God Only Knows

"When I was dating, you had to be an atheist. I don't mess with religion. And I genuinely just don't think atheists + religious people work out."

"And I know... There's going to be someone who comments (assuming there are enough upvotes) who says "I worked out with my spouse who's religious and I'm not!" but you're the exception. When it comes to making decisions long-term, how to spend your money, where you think you'll go after you die, not to mention basic morality (!), and if you have children - that's a huge hurdle."

– Lulu_42

"We worked it out. It's absolutely an exception and not the rule. Don't do it if you can avoid it."

– Alcoraiden

Let's Move Tonight (Literally)

"They need to be ok with cold weather."

"I grew up in the north, live in the south, and I'm tolerating it until I can move back north. If someone says they hate the cold it's an instant turn-off because I don't want to drag someone into a climate they hate."

"The same thing also applies to walkability. I want to move somewhere walkable, and I hope to meet someone with that same goal rather than try to talk them into it."

– ThePresidentCantSwim

"Let me know when you find this mythical northern walkable community."

– Partner-Elijah

My Purr-fect Match

"Cat has to approve."

– Possible-Source-2454

Non-Negotiable

"They need to be male. Kind of important."

– RMHaney

"So weird, I want the complete opposite."

– eightvo

Yeah, the male thing is kind of important for me too!

Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments.

Life is full of shock and surprise.

Apparently, that is part of the fun.

Who hasn't been left stunned by life events?

We always think we're immune to way too many things.

Anything and everything is possible.

It's important to be ready.

Redditor Bob_the_peasant wanted to hear about the things that have left people SHOOK, so they asked:

"What 'That can’t happen to me' thing happened to you?'"

I haven't been left that shocked that often.

I'm always expecting the worst, so I'm prepared.

But you never know.

I'm Dead

Snakes Imacelebau GIF by I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! AustraliaGiphy

"A snake fell out of a tree and bit me on the head."

"ETA: I have always been more scared of snakes than anyone I know, so it’s just so ironic that this happened to me of all people."

amanitachill

Crash Into Me

"A car crashed through my kitchen last year."

aster636

"I woke up to a truck parking in my bathtub 2 weeks before Christmas a few years ago. I watched my sink roll past my bedroom door followed by a hubcap. The driver managed to cross a median, 3-lane road, up an embankment, through an iron fence and between trees. He'd been involved in an altercation nearby and was fleeing the scene."

anjie59k

Hot Air

Swinging Hot Air Balloon GIF by Red BullGiphy

"My family and I were in a hot air balloon crash."

GymDoll2000

"My friend had one crash into her pool when she was a kid."

Environmental-Car481

This is why hot air balloons and skydiving are just a HELL no for me.

Always have. Always will.

Tragic

Cat No GIF by Looney TunesGiphy

"My wife cheated on me with my best friend. They’re moving in together next month. I’m in a new city thousands of miles away. I found out a month ago."

Tssodie

Bad Penguin

"Everyone else’s stories are very sad so here’s something a bit lighter. I’ve mentioned this story before but I got bitten on the neck by a penguin."

"I was at an event where the local zoo had a penguin and owl sitting on tables with handlers so you could take a picture next to them. The penguin went for my glass of wine, I moved the wine, and it bit me on the neck hard enough to bruise. They removed the penguin after that. 😂."

archaeologistbarbie

All Gone

"Our house burned in a wildfire, we lost absolutely everything we owned and only salvaged a single coffee 3 cup."

"On the good side: There was a boy I crushed on all through high school. We went to summer camp together and I adored him. We ended up getting together in our 20s after reconnecting, and have now been together more than 20 years, married almost 17. We’re as madly in love as ever."

toomuchisjustenough

Good Luck

"Homelessness. It came swiftly and out of nowhere. had no savings and the landlord sold the house I was in. couldn’t afford a new place so lived in my car with my dog for a few months. ended up finding community assistance and got into an apartment."

jumbospicyslimjim

"I can’t even imagine being in that situation. Hopefully, this is just the start of things turning around for you. Sending you good energy!"

frappbarqueen

Early Michael Myers

"About 10 years ago, I was stabbed in the arm with a flathead screwdriver. It was a coworker whom I had previously gotten along well with. He had stopped taking benzos and smoking weed a few days before and was on a hair trigger. I said something sarcastic, and he just snapped."

Mr_Spaghetti_Hands

Bad Landing

Bad Day Seagull GIF by Sound FXGiphy

"I was lying on the beach and a seagull flying very high took a poop and it went straight in my mouth."

Competitive_Show6205

This is why I say... "Never trust a seagull!"

They are minions of the devil.

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.

historical reenactors
Sigmund on Unsplash

We've probably all heard some variation of the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction."

Real life isn't just strange, it can also be downright ridiculous.

History is riddled with moments of absurdity.

So ridiculous that people have a hard time believing real life is, well, really real.

Keep reading...Show less