Frustrated Workers Share The Jokes They're Sick Of Hearing About Their Professions

[rebelmouse-image 18350128 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

It feels like everybody fancies themselves a comedian. Everybody has a "witty" retort or barb they think is just the most original commentary since the Bible. And 10 times out of 10 people are wrong. You're not funny and your "humor" is tired. Especially when you're throwing humor at a person's daily career. If the joke is blatantly obvious then rest assured it's been said before.

Redditor _u/itsplanty wanted to know what some "laughs" people are tired of hearing by asking... What dumb joke do you hear too often because of your job? How more customer service people aren't arrested more often I'll never know.


When I delivered mail: "you can keep the bills" or some other comment about not wanting the bills.


[rebelmouse-image 18350129 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My boss' name is Josh, everyday he says, "I'm just Joshing ya!" Every. Day.


[rebelmouse-image 18350130 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My title was literally "Package Handler."


I have a friend who is a _"Pipe Layer" _and another buddy who is a _"Load Handler"_ to many jokes.


I was unofficially titled the "fluffer" at my old job. I was really good at taking out the display Christmas trees and making them look all fluffy and pretty.



[rebelmouse-image 18350131 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"Can you turn off the suck button"

Recording engineer. Haha, I get it, you're not a very good musician, now let's take it from the top because you're ignoring the click.

And the joke that the engineers always make is, "Yeah, that was ok, but this time maybe sing it like it's a record."


[rebelmouse-image 18350132 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

When I'm taking money at the Drive Thru, WHICH WE ARE TIMED ON, BY THE WAY.

"Oh I already paid."

"No you didn't, it's still on the board. Did you pay with a card or something?"

"Orders up."

"Also I didn't see anyone come over."

"Yeah, but I already paid, so you can just give it to me."

"No, I can't. Where's your receipt?"

Timer starts beeping. We get I think 120 seconds?

"Oh I didn't get it, but I paid."

"Dude. I know you didn't. Just break already."

"Haha, okay, you got me!"

Five cars behind him. 300 seconds on the timer, your food is cold, and I'm pissed.

"Have a good day, buddy!"

Don't waste my time.

Happens once a day.


[rebelmouse-image 18978182 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm a salesman who's name happens to be Jake.

I hear on a daily basis

"Oh you quit your job at State Farm? Why?"


"Why aren't you wearing khakis?"

I laugh along most times because I want the sale. But I'm always internally screaming. Don't get me started on my last name.


[rebelmouse-image 18978183 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

When i worked Retail,

Me: "Can I get you anything else?" Customer: "Yea, a million dollars"

Now usually i just pulled the fake customer service laugh and let it go, but if it's a cute girl, I once said this...

"We sell mirrors on Aisle 7, I'm sure you'll find it there."


[rebelmouse-image 18978184 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Teacher giving a test

"Any questions about the directions?"

"What's the answer to #1."

Wanna just walk out of the room sometimes.


[rebelmouse-image 18978185 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Work in a morgue. "Oh people are just DYING to come see you!!" To which I respond _"Obviously. I'm delightful."I also was once asked how things were going in the morgue and I replied "Lively"as it was pretty busy that day. They thought it was so hilarious and now 2 years later they won't let me forget that I referred to a morgue as _"lively" one time.


[rebelmouse-image 18978186 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My name's Michael and I worked at Michaels. No I'm not the CEO.


[rebelmouse-image 18356123 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

When you're clearing someone's empty plate and ask if they liked their meal. "Oh, no, I hated it!"

Can't believe this hasn't been mentioned yet. I used to hear it literally 10x a day when I was working in restaurants.

#@%#$#%@$@%%$ YOU!

[rebelmouse-image 18978187 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm an operator in a power plant.

"Oh my God are you Homer Simpson lololololololololol! Do you want a donut hahahaha!"


[rebelmouse-image 18978188 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Some guy during his abdominal ultrasound: "so is it a boy or a girl??"

cue fake laugh and internal eye roll


[rebelmouse-image 18978189 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Preschool teacher (in sweden).

"Must be nice to just play all day long, right? Hahaha!"

Let's put it this way. You and your SO are sitting in an apartment with 2 bedrooms. Suddenly someone opens the door and 18 screaming three year olds comes running in. Two adults in a small area with 18 children.. How much playing do you think you have time for?


[rebelmouse-image 18359457 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"Oh look! You're both wearing blue shirts! I guess I didn't get the blue shirt memo!" Oh, Karen. You're hilarious. Go away and stay there.


[rebelmouse-image 18348614 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

If something doesn't scan at the register "that means it's free, right?"


[rebelmouse-image 18346733 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I've had an influx of people moving their insurance from other carriers and they always try to make some witty response about how the company they are with weren't working out for them. For example, if they had Nationwide, I swear to god every single one of them says "Nationwide wasn't on MY side!" Or if they had Progressive, they say something about how Flo didn't use her price checker tool for them or with Allstate they would say they weren't in good hands. (These are just examples)

In reality, though, your prices were increased because you're a shitty driver and think you're entitled to lower rates when you have 3 pages worth of MVR violations.


[rebelmouse-image 18978191 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

We engrave stones here at the shop and the number of times I've heard "You guys rock!" or "Hey, it's not like it's etched in stone or anything?", or my personal favorite _"You've spelled it wrong." are mind boggling. The first two are fine, the last one isn't great because it fills me with dread and panic until they say _"Ha! Just kidding!"


[rebelmouse-image 18978192 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Estate Planning legal assistant here.

"Are you here of your own free will?" points to wife "No she made me do this"


[rebelmouse-image 18978193 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"Can you add a couple of zeroes to this?" I'm a payroll accountant, I do all the paychecks for my company.

It wasn't funny the first time. It's remained not funny for seven years.

Have you ever found yourself in a conversation, when someone brings up a topic they aren't too familiar with, but you are?

This gives you the opportunity to sweep in and share your knowledge on the subject.

While one would imagine that your relative expertise on the subject might result in thanks and appreciation, more often than not, the reaction from your friends is "why do you know that?"

Awkward as it may feel at the moment, there are very few people who don't carry some unusual areas of expertise and trivia on subjects most others are most likely unfamiliar with.

Redditor quadruple_b was curious to learn the random facts others have shared which wound up bringing their conversations to a halt, leading them to ask:

What is a really weird fact, that makes people say "why do you know that?"
Keep reading...Show less

As relationships get serious, it's understandable that one will want to know as much as possible about their significant others.

That is, until we make a discovery about them which might forever change how we view our relationship.

Sometimes, it might be a discovery that might just take some getting used to, even if we'd have been better off not knowing.

Other times, however, this newfound information makes remaining in this relationship untenable.

Redditor Mr_MightyMouse was curious to hear what people wished they'd never learned about their past and present relationships, leading them to ask:

"What is the one thing you found out about your S/O you wish you never did?"
Keep reading...Show less
People Break Down Their Most Shameful NSFW Moments
Photo by krakenimages on Unsplash

It's ok to be naughty.

But sometimes... you wanna watch yourself.

Naughty can lead to trouble.

And we're talking adult naughty.

Maybe it's time we discussed it all.

Rule #1... Better safe than sorry.

Redditor Black_Hole_Baken-00wanted hear from all the people willing to share sexy secrets that might leave plenty of people blushing. They asked:

"What’s your most shameful NSFW moment?"
Keep reading...Show less
People Who Knowingly Slept With Someone In A Relationship Explain Why They Did It
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

Don't have sex with people attached to someone already.

There is no good excuse.

There is no reason that makes it worth it.

Most of the time the "reasons" are lies.

RedditorVirtual_Welder_4525wanted to hear from those willing to spill a little tea about some bedmates. They asked:

"People who knowingly have slept with someone who was in a relationship, why did you do it?"
Keep reading...Show less