"Those who have been or currently are in the Foster Care System, what do you wish people knew?" –– That was today's burning question from Redditor KanyesNotABadGuy, opening the door for one of the more eye-opening topics to catch our attention in a while.
"I got really, really lucky..."
I got really, really lucky and was placed with a decent family that didn't treat me like a second-class citizen. I was family. I've seen horror stories of other places where kids starve or are mistreated in their homes. I had the best possible situation and I won't deny that at all.
However.. It's still so much to deal with as a small child. Remember when you were a kid and you cried when left at the babysitters? Imagine going to live at the babysitter's house. My mom wasn't a bad mom.. she was a troubled woman trying to get away from an abuser. I was in the home for about half a decade.. which is an eternity as a small kid. At 10, half my life had been split between two moms and I wasn't sure what I was allowed to feel. When I finally went back home would my real mom be upset that I missed my foster mom? Should I talk about missing my old school?
The home I stayed at also had upwards of four foster kids at a time, who shuffled in and out. A bunch of kids from ages 3-16 who had been through some horrendous stuff. And there I was, a broken kid surrounded by other broken kids. It's a hell of an environment, no matter how good the parents are.
"Had a pretty happy family..."
Had a pretty happy family until I was in high school. Played sports, oldest of my siblings, middle class family, no worries. Right before high school my mom and dad got divorced. We stayed with my mom and things went down hill from there. I ended up aging out of foster care.
I think some of the most important things some people should realize is that supporting the child during foster care AND after they have aged out are key. I was lucky enough to be part of a program where they would give me a stipend every month as long as I was a full time student or working a full time job. I can't tell you how critical it was and how beneficial having that extra money to help buy a car, groceries, and an apartment was. Even with no family or safety net I ended up becoming a pretty good functioning member of society.
I also want to add that Case workers are sometimes some of the greatest people on this earth and can really make or break a child's life. From placement into a home, to advocacy for you in family court, to showing you all the resources available to you as a state ward or foster child.
The last thing would be that being patient with someone who has gone through that is a big thing. I had no idea what a health romantic relationship looked like and had issues with that. Figuring out what a work ethic was, how important insurance was, how to get it, how to get a bank account. Basic every day life is not easy when you're constantly thinking about if you'll need to pack your things in a trash bag in 5 minutes to go to another house or not. So be patient, hold the the person the child or young adult accountable, and show some love. It'll make a huge difference.
"I was in foster care..."
I was in foster care from when I was 3 until I was 7. Whenever I talk to people about it, they always immediately assume it was terrible. But it really wasn't. For one thing, I was moved between 5 or 6 different houses in that time. And only one of them was actually terrible. The rest of the households were really loving. They generally accepted me as part of the family, and although it was hard to get used to at first, over time it felt like they were my family.
Foster parents are unbelievably nice people. The fact that they were so willing to bring these kids they've never met before in, and treat them like family is mind blowing. Most of the families even let my Mom come see us so that way we wouldn't feel bad.
"I wish people..."
I wish people didn't take for granted the beauty and the importance of found families for people who had to live in foster care. found family means everything for me. and i feel like people don't appreciate found families a lot, or they take those families very lightly.
"We need people..."
I wish people knew that we had to learn certain coping mechanisms that create barriers- we had to in order to survive.
We need people in our lives willing to help us remove the barriers, to know that all we want is to feel safe, to feel loved.
We know its hard to do.
We need you.
"Now I'm an adult..."
I was in foster care, on and off, for some of middle/high school. It was whatever, and always a difficult adjustment to living the life I was living (no rules, everyone doing drugs all of the time) and seemingly I'd get more in line and fit in with the family and then get moved back home or with a family member and then it would start again.
I want people to know how hard early adulthood is with no family though. I turned 17, got kicked out and was too old to be replaced. I graduated high school living at my boyfriend's parents house at the time. I had, miraculously, had a teacher who told me I could go to college and he actually helped me make that happen.
I mean, this man showed up to my part time job on the weekends and dropped off food/books/gift-cards for gas and helped me fill out a FASFA and write my admissions essay. He literally changed my life, because he cared.
Now I'm an adult (26) and I am still amazed I made it. I don't have kids of my own, but I can't wait to get to the point where I can foster kids. I know what it's like, and sometimes being a foster parent isnt only "Im going to adopt a baby", sometimes it's "I'm gonna make sure this angry 16 year old knows their options for the future" and I want to be that person for someone.
"A crisis comes up..."
Foster care was fine. It's after you leave it that is hard. Being a new adult with absolutely nobody to guide you. You want to move; you have no help. A crisis comes up, you have nobody to call. Nobody to help you figure out anything about jobs or apartments or bank accounts or insurance. No mom or dad to lend you 20 bucks when your pay cheque isn't going to last until next payday. You are sent out on your own, 18 years old, completely alone and no idea how anything works in the world. It's terrifying.
"You are often..."
I was in foster care in my teens. My experience may be different than others but I found that if you aren't small and cute you are treated as tainted goods. The social worker doesn't really care about you unless you can make the business money and if you make them good money they find a way to keep you for as long as possible. They can keep a child until they are 24 quite easily.
You are often treated as if you are bad because your parents didn't want you anymore. Upon arriving at a group home I was instantly stripped of all privileges including being able to listen to music and had to earn the smallest of things back over the next 3 months.
It felt like I was being punished.
There are also no resources for when you leave the system. Foster families are often low income, using you for the extra income given to take care of you without actually using that money on you. They often don't teach you life skills. Education can easily get messed up because you are moved around as soon as you become an inconvenience to the family. Switching between blocks and periods makes it so that your credits don't count in certain instances. When I left foster care I found out a year and a half of my schooling wouldn't count and it took another 3 months for them to transfer my records. The school told me to drop out and get my GED.
"I was in foster care..."
I was in foster care for about a year and one thing I wish more parents knew is:
Patience is so important for some children, a lot of us come from troubled pasts and trying to immediately force change whether it be things like schedule or behavior can do so much more harm than good and getting frustrated with us isn't helping much either.
"I always appreciate..."
I was in and out of foster care as a teen, 21 now. I wish people knew how incredibly difficult and lonely life can be when you age out of the system or reach adulthood. I was lucky enough to go to college and have most of my expenses paid for but it was really hard to navigate college and find support systems because colleges aren't really equipped to handle kids like us.
I always appreciated the adult mentors that tried treat me like their daughter and the friends that invited me to spend time with their families, as long as it wasn't out of pity.
I had to leave college last January (I was two years in) for a plethora of reasons. Hopefully one day I'll get to go back. The college graduation rate for former foster youth is incredibly low and I want to give kids a little hope that they're more than a statistic and their story is still unwritten.
"My Husband and I...."
My husband and I were set to foster. We had done the classes, home study, everything. However, I was diagnosed with cancer and we were unable to complete, we were then denied when we reapplied when I was in remission.
I was able to join an organization that partners with foster teens who are aging out of the system to provide mentoring services.
I am in HR and I help with resumes, interview prep, job seeking etc. I am also just an adult who is available to listen. There are ways to support the foster system if you are unable to foster a child. I am so grateful that I am allowed this opportunity! Krankenloffel
For the $$$
Family did foster care for 26 years. I was adopted when I was 5. Some are pure and want to help and maybe expand. Some are in it for $. Reddit
"The Little Brother"
I have a little brother who was adopted from the foster system. Our parents are good people. The most heartbreaking things that I noticed from him in the beginning were a kind of confusion at being treated well by our parents and also confusion at being treated as just one of us/included as a family member.
There are some not so good foster homes out there... throwawaysmetoo
Due to an ugly custody battle between my parents my sister and I spent a short time in foster care (about a year). And i was 3 when I was put in foster care, my sister a little older. I was in my "potty training" days and my foster parents made me wear diapers 24-7 and whenever I used the bathroom in my diaper they rubbed it in my face like I was a dog. Then also while I was there I got chicken pox really bad and they refused to take me to the doctor or get me any kind of cream to help the itching, just let me suffer. crazycatm0m
I personally am not a foster child, but my dad and step mom did foster care. I've had over 100 foster siblings over the years as a result. Some they've adopted, a few aged out, and most were placed back into their homes or with other relatives.
From my perspective the worst thing is when parents hang onto their rights and get their kids back. They clean up their act just well enough in the states eyes, but really nothing has changed. The kids then wind up back in the system, or even more messed up than before.
Some parents really do change for the better and become fit to parent, it's just the ones who don't that make it hard to watch. AnObviousDisinterest
My wife and I recently got our first foster care placement about three weeks ago. It's been a short time, but this has been the best and most fulfilling experience of my life. My little foster daughter is such a wonderful, strong little girl, and I am happy to be able to provide her with a safe and loving home. This is the first time in her life she's lived somewhere and not had a lot of other kids around, and I think she's really flourishing with the one on on attention. Slinkarooni
I come from a family that fostered for years with one foster moving in with us at 11 and never leaving. My parents are actually in the process of adopting him now in his mid 20s. I wish more people knew about how many weirdos are in the system. Some of the families we met were clearly just in it for the money or were super religious weirdos that seemed like they collected children.
If you're a good person who wants to do some good in the world, become a foster parent. It's one of the hardest things my family has ever done, couple kids were violent and eventually institutionalized, but so many more just want someone to love and believe in them. It was also incredibly rewarding and landed me another brother who I love very much. Tress33
It's not that bad....
It's not as bad as people might think.
But, I also consider myself very lucky because I know it could have been worse.
I was taken away and placed with a foster family immediately, when I was 2. They later adopted me when I was 5. My earliest memories? They were just like you would expect with any other family. The made absolutely sure that we weren't treated like anything other than family.
Things were a lot harder for them then it was for me, as they fostered other children, children they didn't think should go back to their families but there was nothing they could do. One of their biggest regrets was not being able to adopt my brother as well, since the courts ruled in the favor of his father (half siblings).
They taught me that just because someone is related to you, doesn't make you family. Those that treat you like family, are family. Mrs0Murder
Some farmers use foster kids as essentially slave labor. I was one of those kids. I got up at 4:30am to go round up the cows off the 180 acres, and get milking started before I could get ready for school. In summer it was the same except full herd milking and more chores all day.
Couldn't ever go anywhere, and smelled like dung all the time no matter how much I showered. Hated it. Ran away, but social services brought me back. I did learn a good work ethic though. trickyelf
My sister is a foster parent. She said that the episode of The Simpson's where they have to go to parenting classes to get the kids back is closer to reality than you'd think. Nach0Man_RandySavage
There are few things more satisfying than a crisp $20 bill. Well, maybe a crisp $100 bill.
But twenty big ones can get you pretty far nonetheless.
Whether it's tucked firmly in a birthday card, passing from hand to hand after a knee-jerk sports bet, or going toward a useful tool, the old twenty dollar bill has been used for countless purposes.
Breaking Even<p>"I got a jacket and a pair of jeans at goodwill for about $20. My first time wearing the jacket I found a tiny zipper inside a pocket."</p><p>"There was a secret inner pocket with a twenty in it."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpdv70q?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TheBrontosaurus</a></p>
Keeps On Giving<p>"23 Years ago I was in the US for some work and was not prepared for the cold of Chicago. Went to wal-mart and bought myself a cheap, warm jacket."</p><p>"I'm wearing that jacket right now - still looks fine, still keeps me warm."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpe41xv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TastyEnd</a></p>
As Good As They Come<p>"Wool pinstripe double breasted suit from Goodwill, fit perfectly and was brand new. Ended up wearing it to get married the next year." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpdw6mx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">verminiusrex</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"God I love Goodwill!!" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpe5aee?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Neverthelilacqueen</a></p>
The Socks She Needed<p>"I work at a thrift shop. A homeless lady came in and asked us where the socks were. We only sell new socks, so I directed her towards the new socks and she was... shocked and disappointed by the price tag, surely."<br></p><p>"I gave her a moment as she looked, and she moved to some kids' socks and picked them up, and I... just couldn't let that happen. I told her that I would help her, and told her to get herself some socks and a jacket."</p><p>"She kind of just... held out the children's socks, so I took them, put them back, and grabbed the extra fluffy socks that were hanging."</p><p>"She grabs a jacket and some pants, and I pay for it. My coworker looks the other way since we're not supposed to purchase anything while on the clock. The lady is in tears as she walks out."</p><p>"I notice that she's still outside a minute later putting them on, and ask her if they fit her or if she needed something else; and she told me they were perfect and proceeded to cry. I cried in return."</p><p>"It was a good day."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpen3w1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Snowodin</a></p>
Not Forgotten<p>"A guy came into my work when I managed a mom and pop Pizza Place. He said he was stranded with no phone, and no money, but that the people at the Verizon store next door to us said they could get him a cheap phone with some minutes on it for 20 bucks."</p><p>"He offered to do dishes for a few hours to make some money so he could get this phone. I told him not to worry about it and gave him a 20 from my wallet. He thanked me, asked me for my name, and then he left and I never saw him again."</p><p>"Skip forward about 5 months, and when I get into work the owner was there and said she had gotten a letter addressed to me. 'Weird,' I thought."</p><p>"But when I opened it there was a 50 dollar bill and a short note from the guy I gave 20 dollars to thanking me for my kindness and for not turning him away."</p><p>"Turns out he was in a bad way (addicted to hard drugs and homeless) and really was stranded there. He was trying to get a phone so he could contact his parents (who lived in another state) for help."</p><p>"From what it sounded like, he seemed to really turn his life around. He was clean and working a stable job while still living with his parents."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpem2xc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Mixmaster-McGuire</a></p>
The Best Finale<p>"It was the day before payday. My wife came to see me at work. My break was in an hour, so I asked for her to wait a bit, so we could enjoy it together. She did."</p><p>"I bought her some lunch, because it was what I could afford. I bought her a ham and cheese sub sandwich and two iced teas. These were her favorite. I bought gas with the rest of the twenty so she could get home. She dropped me back off at work."</p><p>"That night, she passed away. It brings me comfort to know that I bought her favorite sandwich and drink for her that afternoon. It was likely the last thing she ate, since it was near dinner. I'll never forget it. Best $20 I ever spent, because it was for her."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpe9c6d?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LollipopDreamscape</a></p>
Leaning Into the Nerdery<p>"It was my ninth or tenth birthday. My grandparents gave me $20. The first $20 bill I ever held in my hand! I knew exactly what I wanted to do with it."</p><p>"A week later, we went into the city and Toys R Us. I went straight to the Transformers aisle. And there he was. My favourite Transformer. The one I always wanted...Soundwave."</p><p>"He's the one who turned into a Walkman and he could eject cassettes that turned into robot animals. The price tag said $19.99. It was meant to be."</p><p>"I took Soundwave to the clerk and gave her my $20 bill. "And here's your change!" she said, as she gave me a single penny."</p><p>"Ah, Soundwave. The best friend a lonely little nerd could have."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpdzzxe?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">originalchaosinabox</a></p>
Different Time<p>"I went to a Rush concert in 1982. The ticket was $9.50 and the t-shirt was $10." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpdyr0k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PaulsRedditUsername</a></p>
Motivational Spending<p>"My then six year old niece had a loose tooth she loved to show off and had resisted pulling out for two weeks. We were all at my parents and I was getting ready to leave, I pulled out a $20 and said 'I'll give you this right now if you pull out your tooth.' "</p><p>"She was already crying because her little sister had did something so when she ran into the bathroom none of us had no idea in what she was about to do."</p><p>"So she comes out crying still, but a little bit of blood I'm her mouth because of course, she pulled out her tooth. But the now removed tooth fell down the drain to the sink and she was crying because she lost her proof!"</p><p>"After she calmed down she was happy as a clam with a brand new $20 and everyone was quite proud of her. My sister told me she spent it on candy and shared with her little sister."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpdxi4k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">themasimumdorkus</a></p>
For the Story<p>"It was actually to a scammer in Rome. There was this guy right outside of Colosseum who started tying strings around my wrist and told me to make a wish. I knew it was going to cost but I thought what the hell, last day in Rome so might as well go with it. </p><p>"My wish was to find love."</p><p>"I spent rest of the day getting lost in the city and stumbled across two weddings and one baptism ceremony. So I did find love, just not for myself."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lvu5aq/whats_the_best_20_you_ever_spent/gpe7b2w?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FatalFinn</a></p>
I realize that school safety has been severely compromised and has been under dire scrutiny over the past decade and of course, it should be. And when I was a student, my safety was one of my greatest priorities but, some implemented rules under the guise of "safety" were and are... just plain ludicrous. Like who thinks up some of these ideas?Redditor u/Animeking1108 wanted to discuss how the education system has ideas that sometimes are just more a pain in the butt than a daily enhancement... What was the dumbest rule your school enforced?
Don't Peek<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTcxNDc4OS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzNDE0Mzc2OH0.Y1Lzy1MTqxyVqOCe9xjeHTRZsKnbyVjYzdb4-Heldyo/img.gif?width=980" id="78b19" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="e14a90be026b734830e7661f776ba4a8" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="475" data-height="475" />schitts creek wtf GIF by CBCGiphy<p>Took all the doors off the men's room bathroom stalls because of vandalism for 2 months.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gphrfce?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"> Endless_Vanity</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Endless_Vanity/" target="_blank"></a></p>
Scanned<p>School added thumb print scanners at gates of school which counted as registration - needless to say I would just walk to school scan my thumb and walk back home with them none the wiser. Was a great few months until they noticed. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpidnou?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">richpianofan5</a></p>
Age of Empires...<p>Conservative Christian College. A group of us played Age of Empires one weekend. They didn't like it and called a meeting. Everyone involved got misdemeanors on their records. There was nothing in the handbook about it being against the rules. The only person that didn't get any punishment was the son of the president even though he was just as involved as the rest of us. <span></span></p>
"Genius"<p>In my freshman year of high school we had a terrible vandalism problem, the bathrooms would be broken in various ways almost constantly. In a stroke of pure genius, the staff decided that any bathroom that was vandalized would be closed for the week on first offense, the quarter for second, and permanently on the third offense.</p><p>They took back the rule after closing every bathroom on day one. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpi77co?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"> Samus388</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Samus388/" target="_blank"></a></p>
Is this Footloose?<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTcxNDc5Ny9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMzg0MjU2M30.PeBUt-YWZeeRStaD_RZlGPQzo29E9t733yqZbIiJlYs/img.gif?width=980" id="3a5bd" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="102730e3b1b90ba9cb393561c702c9af" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="500" data-height="500" />kevin bacon dancing GIF by STARZGiphy<p>Prom was a mandatory lockdown for the night in order to avoid students going to parties after prom.</p><p>Prom was held at various house parties across town instead. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpi37x7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Coffee-spree</a></p>
HOLDEN FOREVER!!!<p>My high school mascot was Daniel Boone holding a musket. A kid wore a Guns 'n Roses shirt to school and was told he had to change shirts because of the pistols on the shirt. He pointed out the hypocrisy of the school mascot and they changed EVERYTHING. The mascot was switched to holding a flag pole instead. <span></span></p>
No Dots<p>You couldn't wear ANY kind of head items that were "gang colours" (red or blue) - this No included hair bands, scrunchies, beads in your hair, ribbons - ANYTHING. I got in trouble for wearing a blue hair band with white polka dots. </p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gphzpyf?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Pleasant-Flamingo344</a></p>
Clothes Check<p>We had to wear belts. Someone snitched that people weren't wearing belts under their sweaters, and they actually checked and a bunch of people got detentions. Stupid. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gphz3y6?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ooo-ooo-oooyea</a></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gphz3y6?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"></a>We had belt raids at my school where the dean would burst into classes, completely interrupting any education, to check that everyone was wearing a belt. </p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpia8pp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">GuinnessMicrodose</a></p>
Chase the Flat<p>We weren't allowed to play tag football at lunch, only frisbee. When I asked the principal what the difference was, he responded with a sarcastic tone, "A football is round and a frisbee is a flat disk."</p><p>He left the school later that year, went to another school, and a few years later was brought up on charges for failing to report the abuse of a student by a teacher. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpi6lh3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">uninc4life2010</a></p>
Poke-Thief<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTcxNDgwMy9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0ODg5MzY2Nn0.5LMPk1suou6U2SvAURKP-sHEuK7Izpkbxm0PWqvx95E/img.gif?width=980" id="b6e9f" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="92383d30e34aa92fd74cf6c1374ec294" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="480" data-height="480" />hotline bling pokemon GIFGiphy<p>Pokemon cards got banned in middle school because someone stole the vice principal's kid's cards. Yep. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpiapym?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"> Skadoosh_it</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Skadoosh_it/" target="_blank"></a></p>
In the Face...<p>If you were involved in a fight, you got suspended. While it sounds reasonable, context didn't matter.</p><p>I got suspended once not for throwing a single punch, kick, whatever. I got suspended because someone knocked the books out of my hand and when I reached down to grab them they punched me in the face.</p><p>I got suspended for walking down the hallway and unprovoked getting punched in the face.</p><p>Forget Brandon Valley Middle School. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lwjlif/what_was_the_dumbest_rule_your_school_enforced/gpicbyx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">CLG_MianBao</a></p>
One of the golden rules of life? Doctors are merely human. They don't know everything and they make mistakes. That is why you always want to get another opinion. Things are constantly missed. That doesn't mean docs don't know what they're doing, they just aren't infallible. So make sure to ask questions, lots of them.Redditor u/Gorgon_the_Dragon wanted to hear from doctors about why it is imperative we always get second and maybe third opinions by asking... Doctors of Reddit, what was the worse thing you've seen for a patient that another Doctor overlooked?
Grandma Wins<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTcxNDcxOC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0OTQxNTgzOX0.n9IaFGgHwnULMlI2kg7RUftxDg6lyWvdM9CnhvptCRY/img.gif?width=980" id="a0857" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="9762f97a23c27ccf6b75974caa854361" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="480" data-height="270" />Old Lady Wine GIF by MattielGiphy<p>Not a doctor, but my grandmother saved my father's eyesight because she didn't listen to their doctor. </p>
The Mummy Appendage<p>When I was a resident, an 80yo female was admitted from the nursing home for confusion. Workup showed some mild UTI and we were giving her antibiotics. The nurse mentioned that her toe looked dark and asked me to look at it. The toe wasn't just dark, it was mummified. It looked like dry beef jerky. I touched it and pieces flaked off. So the patient from a nursing home, had a mummified toe, probably for months, that no one knew about. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lw2g2z/doctors_of_reddit_what_was_the_worse_thing_youve/gpg00qn?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Dr2ray</a></p>
The CT Save<p>Here's my story:</p><p>A guy came in to our ICU and was very septic but still talking. He had visited his primary care MD with complaints of a sore throat for a couple of days. Dismissed without any intervention since he didn't appear to have strep throat or the flu. At this point he was having pretty severe abdominal discomfort, so we sent him for a CT scan. As the scan was finishing, he coded and had to be intubated, multi-organ failure, etc. </p>
Patches<p>When I was an ER nurse we got an elderly lady in for altered mental status from a nursing home, when we undressed her to put her in a gown and hook her up to the monitor, I noticed no less than 5 fentanyl patches on her, guess I discovered the cause of the AMS. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lw2g2z/doctors_of_reddit_what_was_the_worse_thing_youve/gpg1lml?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ChewbaccaSlim426</a></p>
Use your Words<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTcxNDcyMi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MDA1NjI0MH0.WtyCdxL1vRZwD2-jpKZXMOEakwhiBaJIkp1YPnOzlvo/img.gif?width=980" id="e45ca" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f5b98e6a4605a587dbd97579468a51d8" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="498" data-height="367" />Communication GIF by memecandyGiphy<p>Neurologist sent patient to our ED without informing her that imaging showed a glioblastoma assuring her impending death. He didn't overlook the disease, he overlooked the communication. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/lw2g2z/doctors_of_reddit_what_was_the_worse_thing_youve/gpfl5t5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">AzureSkye27</a></p>
Mad Cow Realty<p>During my residency we had this lady in her 60s who was getting progressively more forgetful, just overall declining and getting less and less able to take care of herself. She had been seeing her pcp who diagnosed her with dementia. And she saw a neurologist who agreed. She was not really able to provide an accurate history. <span></span></p>
After Birth...<p>I used to work in maternal-fetal medicine, and every single week, we would have women referred to us "because the doctor couldn't see something clearly with the baby and wanted to double check." Nope, they just didn't want to have to be the ones to tell you that your baby had a complex cardiac defect or multiple anomalies indicative of a genetic syndrome or any other of a large number of horrible things that can happen during fetal development. Still pisses me off when I think about how many women waited weeks for more information because their doctors were cowards who couldn't tell them, "There's something seriously wrong here." <span></span></p>
bad doctors<p>I'm not a doctor, but a RN. This happened to me, but isn't nearly as bad as most of the stories on here.</p><p>When I was in college, I got to where I couldn't swallow. It started with difficulty swallowing, progressed to me having to swallow bites of food multiple times/regurgitating it, and then got to where all I could swallow was broths and mashed potatoes with no chunks. I went to the doctor multiple times, and was told every time it was acid reflux and part of my anxiety disorder. <span></span></p>
The Valve...<p>He put the pacemaker lead in the subclavian artery (and across the aortic valve into the left ventricle). The proper approach is: subclavian vein to right ventricle). And then he didn't notice it for over a year. I saw the patient (a 25 yo woman who didn't need the pacemaker in the first place) when she was in congestive heart failure. <span></span><br></p>
Bitten<p>Rattlesnake bite. On a 2 year old. Patient and dad out in the fields near a small town that is several hours away from the nearest big city, where I work.</p>
When we think about learning history, our first thought is usually sitting in our high school history class (or AP World History class if you're a nerd like me) being bored out of our minds. Unless again, you're a huge freaking nerd like me. But I think we all have the memory of the moment where we realized learning about history was kinda cool. And they usually start from one weird fact.
Here are a few examples of turning points in learning about history, straight from the keyboards of the people at AskReddit.