Former Coma Patients Describe What It Was Like Being Trapped In Their Own Bodies[rebelmouse-image 18349605 is_animated_gif=
It's so hard to imagine what it would be like to be in a coma, if you've never been in one. Is it like sleep? Do you maintain some level of consciousness? What exactly does it mean to be in a coma? What's so scary is scientists have almost no answers for us. It's impossible to replicate the level of consciousness from inside of a coma. Luckily, there are some surviving coma victims who can share with us.
Redditor lauren__95 asked the internet:
Here were some of the harrowing recounts.
Tears[rebelmouse-image 18349606 is_animated_gif=
My husband was put into a medically induced coma when he was 4 years old for 6 weeks, after a near death experience post-tonsillectomy (that's a whole other story - lead to the discovery of a very rare bleeding disorder.)
During the coma he could hear everything and he could feel. His family would notice tears, he was crying while comatose, and no one could figure it out, not even the doctors. Then one day his grandma got this idea that if he could cry, maybe he could feel, and if he could feel, maybe he's itchy. She scratched his whole body for him. The crying stopped. She did it every day till he woke up. He remembers feeling itchy and not being able to scratch. He also remembers the relief when his grandma started doing it for him.
Secondhand[rebelmouse-image 18349607 is_animated_gif=
I went into a coma, after spending 2 & 1/2 months semi-comatose. I may as well have been in a coma the entire time, since I have very little memory of what occurred that entire time, but then again, my memory sucks as a whole, thanks to this entire event. My seizure meds were no longer flushing through my system, and my body just started shutting down, til I ended up fully comatose. Apparently I was having what my sister called a never-ending seizure while in the coma, which led to my being tied to the bed. At one point, I felt my step-mother rubbing on my arm, while her and my sister told me to settle down. Shortly after, the dr told them to go ahead and begin funeral plans, but thankfully, not in my presence. However, the following afternoon, I began the slow process of waking up, pissed off because something was making a god awful noise and I couldn't open my eyes to figure out what it was. Come to find out, it was me, by swallowing against the tube in my throat. Terrifying experience overall, even if most of it has been relayed to me secondhand.
Family Respect[rebelmouse-image 18347054 is_animated_gif=
I don't remember anything from those 6 weeks; but I woke up angry with a family member who rarely visited and did/said dumb stuff around my comatose self. Apparently, when the doctors said I could hear, they weren't wrong. Was angry for quite a while.
Awake[rebelmouse-image 18349608 is_animated_gif=
In my case I was perfectly aware of everything going around me but trapped in a sleeping body. Couldn't move a single part of my body for myself but was able to hear, feel and even focus and see when the dr lift my eyelid. Very frightening. Luckily it only lasted a couple/three hours tops (it was caused by an unknown extreme allergy to opioids).
Opposite Effects[rebelmouse-image 18349609 is_animated_gif=
Short backstory, anesthetics don't work on me. I lose control of my body, but I can hear and feel everything. And I mean everything. My appendix burst a few years ago, I had surgery and I was comatose for 3 days because of the anesthesia. I felt every cut and every stitch, I heard the surgeon talking about his daughter's school play, I felt dad hugging me and crying after the surgery, but I couldn't react. I heard my brother yelling at the doctors why I wasn't awake yet, and my highschool friend talking to me.
This is why I'm scared to get that f-cker of a wisdom tooth removed. What if it happens again?
Probed[rebelmouse-image 18349610 is_animated_gif=
I was put into an induced coma for about 6 days after being struck by a taxi while crossing a road. I was blackout drunk when it happened so for the most part I don't remember anything from about the time I went out for the night to when I was properly woken up after my first surgery (facial reconstruction for my broken frontal bone). However, I was woken up periodically to check how responsive I was. The memories for this stretch of time were pretty hazy. The first thing I remember was waking up and freaking out about having a breathing tube down my throat. This was around the 5th day. Seriously freaked me the f-ck out tbh, it felt like I was being abducted by aliens.
To The Stars[rebelmouse-image 18349612 is_animated_gif=
I was once in a coma for 72 hours.
I remember seeing stars, and a voice telling me to count all the stars if I want to go back, I remember looking 'up' at them and telling the voice it's impossible, there are too many, then I started counting them...
Besides that, I just remember waking up and feeling groggy.
Strange but true.
1st time I've ever told that story.
Another World[rebelmouse-image 18349613 is_animated_gif=
I was in a coma for 11 days from an accident. The Neurologist(s), Internist, Nurses, etc told me I was one of the most 'agitated' Coma patients they had ever seen. They literally had to invent new, almost boxing-type gloves for my hands! But to answer your question, I do remember being in my coma sometimes...its been over a year, and I can still recollect the 'world' that I resided in for those 11 days as clearly now as when I woke up. Contrary to popular culture, one doesn't just "wake up" from a coma and are suddenly themselves. It's very gradual. Takes days. I remember being in a dream-like state, but in that 'dream' I could taste, touch, feel, hear, etc. Its weird. I remember choosing to wake up as well. I was on a cabana on the beach when a guy in his thirties (I can still see his face but he was a complete stranger) approached and spoke with me for a while. As he was talking, suddenly the buildings behind me, pieces of furniture, even people, start to fade away, and disappear altogether. He told me remain calm, and that I had a choice: I could remain where I was, or I could take a left, and walk down the beach to a 'tiki like shack' of sorts, where a Haitian woman would be waiting. I chose to walk. When I arrived at the shack, the woman asked me if I was ready, took me inside, had me lie down on a small, twin bed, and when I replied that I was ready now, I just...started to wake up. Once I 'woke up' from my coma, no matter how many times I floated in and out of consciousness, I could never return to that state again.
Fever Dreams[rebelmouse-image 18349614 is_animated_gif=
I was in a coma in 2007 after suffering Traumatic Brain Injury from crashing my head through a fence as the result of an ATV crash.
I had the craziest dreams, wow. I can still remember a couple of them pretty vividly. I feel like some of the things that were happening in real life were actually contributing to the dreams; for instance one involved the nurses and I got them to take me to a pig blood party in the hospital hallways. There was another wild one involving going through the drive through at mcdonald's in a jeep wrangler with a machine gun strapped to the top.
Week Gone[rebelmouse-image 18349615 is_animated_gif=
My coma was roughly a week but I don't remember anything from that week. I recall the ambulance ride (I had busted my head pretty badly) and know that I heard them saying I would be okay. When I woke up I thought it was still the same day. It was kind of like when you lay down to sleep and wake up eight hours later but it feels like you blinked. You know time passed but it feels like an instant. I tried to sit up but the doctor stopped me and talked to me until I was coherent. Apparently I had been in the process of coming around for about an hour by the time I tried to sit up.
My mom claims that I knew songs after my coma that I couldn't have heard before but I listened to so much radio back then I don't really know if that's accurate.
Another Life[rebelmouse-image 18349616 is_animated_gif=
throw away account cause this is really personal.
While unconscious on the ground I lived a different life.
I met a wonderful young lady, she made my heart skip and my face red, I pursued her for months and dispatched a few jerk boyfriends before I finally won her over, after two years we got married and almost immediately she bore me a daughter.
I had a great job and my wife didn't have to work outside of the house, when my daughter was two she [my wife] bore me a son. My son was the joy of my life, I would walk into his room every morning before I left for work and doted on him and my daughter.
One day while sitting on the couch I noticed that the perspective of the lamp was odd, like inverted. It was still in 3D but... just.. wrong. (It was a square lamp base, red with gold trim on 4 legs and a white square shade). I was transfixed, I couldn't look away from it. I stayed up all night staring at it, the next morning I didn't go to work, something was just not right about that lamp.
I stopped eating, I left the couch only to use the bathroom at first, soon I stopped that too as I wasn't eating or drinking. I stared at the lamp for 3 days before my wife got really worried, she had someone come and try to talk to me, by this time my cognizance was breaking up and my wife was freaking out. She took the kids to her mother's house just before I had my epiphany.... the lamp is not real.... the house is not real, my wife, my kids... none of that is real... the last 10 years of my life are not f-cking real!
The lamp started to grow wider and deeper, it was still inverted dimensions, it took up my entire perspective and all I could see was red, I heard voices, screams, all kinds of weird noises and I became aware of pain.... a f-cking sh-t ton of pain... the first words I said were "I'm missing teeth" and opened my eyes. I was laying on my back on the sidewalk surrounded by people that I didn't know, lots were freaking out, I was completely confused.
at some point a cop scooped me up, dragged/walked me across the sidewalk and grass and threw me face down in the back of a cop car, I was still confused.
I was taken to the hospital by the cop (seems he didn't want to wait for the ambulance to arrive) and give CT scans.
I went through about 3 years of horrid depression, I was grieving the loss of my wife and children and dealing with the knowledge that they never existed, I was scared that I was going insane as I would cry myself to sleep hoping I would see her in my dreams. I never have, but sometimes I see my son, usually just a glimpse out of my peripheral vision, he is perpetually 5 years old and I can never hear what he says.
Paralyzed[rebelmouse-image 18349619 is_animated_gif=
I was in a medical induced coma for a month when I was 8 years old. I could hear the people around me, I wanted to move but I could not I could not open my eyes.
When I did dream it was extremely vivid and mostly nightmares due to the medications I was on. I don't remember them now but my parents say that my heart rate would go up and I looked scared.
I never want to be in a coma again. I still get anxiety thinking about it, even though all I remember is being paralyzed. Not being able to open my eyes, but hearing my parents discussion was terrifying. I wanted to join in I wanted to move, but I couldn't even with my brushes with death this is the one experience I experience the most anxiety/fear from.
Egg Commitments[rebelmouse-image 18349620 is_animated_gif=
I can't speak to her experience as she didn't make it through, but my aunt was in a coma and responded to things we said. Around christmas, my mom said "if Sandy doesn't get up or isn't able, one of us will have to make the deviled eggs this year" and my Aunt's blood pressure spiked. My mom freaked out and said "sorry, we won't take your job from you Sandy" and it went back down as soon as it came.
Band Of Brothers[rebelmouse-image 18349621 is_animated_gif=
Personally I was never in a coma but my uncle worked on an oil rig that burnt down. In a small Canadian town named Flin Flon. He was on the top floor of a 15 story tower as it was on fire. The event is known as one of the more tragic events in the town and everyone who lives there knows about it and someone who was affected by it. All my uncles friends ended up dying except for my uncle. 80% of his body is burns and was in a coma for 2.5 months I think and says the entire time he was dreaming that he was a solider at war and his co-workers were his army pals and he watched them all die in the field and he said he thought it was all real.
Wall Of Clowns[rebelmouse-image 18349622 is_animated_gif=
Was in an induced coma for a week when I was 6.
I dreamt really weird sh-t. I dreamt of this red wall with red objects, slowly passing by in front of my eyes. I also dreamt of a few situations with people I knew (not even friends) where the room was really weirdly lit and it seemed like people were laughing at me. It was kind of scary, cause it I somehow felt something was wrong but there wasn't anything I could do to change it. Lastly, I dreamt of clowns that were laughing at me, but I think that was just me being high on morphine, cause I later heard that I was swearing like hell at the clowns who were supposed to cheer me up.
Trapped[rebelmouse-image 18349624 is_animated_gif=
I've been in a coma - don't remember a thing. It was basically just like a normal night of sleep, except a bit longer. I usually don't dream (or remember doing so), and nothing was really different about it.
I've also had sleep paralysis, and that's a completely different deal. After a long, sleepless night, I was waiting outside a classroom on campus, and sat down in a chair. The moment I leaned my head backward, everything blacked out. I was still completely conscious, but couldn't see anything, couldn't hear anything, and couldn't move a muscle. Right as I internally started panicking, I heard myself start snoring - like incredibly loud, almost cartoonish-level snoring. I desperately tried moving anything I could, mostly out of sheer embarrassment because it still sounded like I was snoring. What felt like minutes later, I finally managed to move an elbow slightly closer inward off of the armrest of my chair, which jolted me sideways a bit, waking me up. Vision and sound started flooding back in, and I immediately noticed that no one around seemed to notice or care that I was basically trapped inside myself for a few minutes. I never did find out if I was actually making any sounds or weird movements, but it was definitely an experience that I don't want to repeat.
I'd pick a coma over sleep paralysis any day.
Impostor Syndrome[rebelmouse-image 18349625 is_animated_gif=
Not me, but my mom. She had a minor procedure last year which went sideways (she developed acute pancreatitis and she went into shock); she slipped into a coma for two months.
She said that she could hear us from time to time, but it was all like a dream. For instance, my sis learned that she was pregnant on the same day my mom slipped into the coma and she told her about it while she was asleep - she woke up and remembered it.
She also had some really weird and vivid dreams. For instance, she was convinced (even after she woke up!) that I was replaced by an impostor. She also woke up angry at my dad about something that happened in a dream. My sister was the only one who she wasn't angry with. At least I know which of her children she loves more is.
Overdose[rebelmouse-image 18349627 is_animated_gif=
I had a short-term (1 night) medically induced coma after reacting violently to an anti-nausea medicine and then given an overdose (mistakenly) of antihistamine to stop the reaction.
I had crazy, vivid nightmares for 8 hours (probably induced by the overdose of antihistamine my body was trying to get rid of). I was never so happy to wake up in my life. I only have nightmares in normal life (never good dreams), so maybe someone else would've been just dreaming.
Late Knowledge[rebelmouse-image 18349628 is_animated_gif=
I was in a coma for 3 Days. It was as if I fell asleep waiting for a nurse and then instantly woke up in a hospital bed. Time travel is never a good thing. My blood sugar was at around 800. This is when I found out that I had childhood onset diabetes at the age of 22. I had lost 40 lbs in 3 months. Went from 6'2 185-145. Within a few days of waking up they had rehydrated my body and I gained most of my weight back. Pretty scary sh-t.
All I Ever Wanted[rebelmouse-image 18349629 is_animated_gif=
My wife was in a coma for several weeks. She was touch and go at first, thought we might lose her, so I didn't bring the kids up. About the 2nd week, after she has stabilized but still in a coma I finally brought the kids up.
While they were their I got them talking about past vacations. Asked them which was their favorite and we talked for a long while about road trip vacations we had taken...one to Nevada & Arizona and one to New Mexico. Then we talked about our what our next vacation should be and they were all into seeing more pueblos, mountains, deserts, caves, dormant volcanoes, canyons etc..kids were laughing and it was quite therapeutic overall.
Flash forward to about a month and a half later when my wife is out of the coma and she has completely real memories of a new vacation. In her mind she has a week long road trip from Texas to New Mexico, then Arizona and back...that never happened. Crazy.
You may have heard of the phrase "retail therapy" before, which is the act of buying things for personal enjoyment.
Well, there's some truth to that.
The University of Michigan actually studied the affects of shopping on our sadness levels. Purchasing something you enjoy can actually decrease sadness 40 times better than not purchasing something.
There are tons of other benefits like dopamine increases, anxiety reduction and improved mood. We wanted to know what people are buying to give them that rush of happy hormones and increase their joy.
Redditor greyblacknavytan asked:
"What can you buy for $75 or less that will provide the most happiness?"
It might be time to start a wish list!
A sweet treat.
"The chocolate bar I’m eating right now is doing it for me. It's a Tony’s Chocolonely milk chocolate sea salt and caramel."
"$75 of Tony’s is a great use of money imo."
The amino acids in chocolate actually change our brain patterns to make us happy, so definitely a good investment.
Your neck will thank you.
"Get a nice pillow. So worth it. I got the a memory foam one from Amazon for $50. My neck is in premature heaven."
"Memory foam pillows are hit or miss. For me, they're all miss. Feels like I'm resting my head on a rock."
"I was the same way until I got a pillow that you stuff to your own firmness with shredded memory foam. It has the feel of a memory foam pillow but it's 'fluffier' if that makes sense. Add to that the customizability of the firmness and you have a perfect pillow IMHO. Just don't throw the extra stuffing away immediately, sleep on it for a while and adjust as needed."
Splurge on some nice food.
"I'm poor but not so poor that food is the main concern. What I mean is some nice cuts of meat, chanterelles, russet potatoes, cream, a nice wine and the rest for beer. I could make a meal for kings on that. It would make me so happy!"
"For sure, similarly you could even provide a meal for a group of friends for that amount which would make a group of people happy."
Invest in your hobbies.
"Invest in a hobby like good hiking boots or high quality yarn for knitting or so on. Hobbies keep you happier, healthier, and can help you make new friends."
"Good hiking boots are going to cost more than $75."
"Save money by buying just one boot."
11 years of happiness.
"I paid the Humane Society about $75 when I adopted my cat; he has thus far provided me with 11 years of affection."
For something silly.
"Googly eyes and some blue tack."
"This is my favorite first date. Just walk around sticking googly eyes to stuff together. It's always so much fun."
"Another one I really liked was leaving sweet notes in books in a bookstore."
"We took some notecards and wrote a short paragraph or two about a favorite book. What we'd enjoyed about it, how we wished we could read it again for the first time, that we were excited the new owner of the book is on the verge of that experience. We signed them with our (common) first names, but included no other contact information."
"Then we snuck them into books in a bookstore."
"It was a super fun date."
"I clicked on this thinking I'd be enlightened by some suggestions... Instead, everyone is telling me to do drugs, go to the gym, and relax with a vibrator."
"OK... You all convinced me. I'm going to buy a vibrator."
"Vibrators are pretty enlightening tbh."
Make a donation.
"3 cataract [treatments] to restore sight via the Fred Hollows foundation."
This can apply to any foundation of your choosing! You're sharing joy with those who need it.
"100% a bidet. A clean butthole makes for a happy day."
"Bidets are so underrated. I just don't feel clean without it anymore, yk?"
Maybe you don't have $75 to spend right now.
Well, even the act of filling up your online shopping cart and hitting "save for later" can give a rush a dopamine.
You're definitely worth that little bit of joy from buying that item that's been sitting in your cart for weeks.
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When we think of a "hero" we might think of someone in a cape who's saving civilians from terror. Or maybe we think of the essential workers we've called heroes throughout the pandemic.
Heroism is simply defined as "great bravery," according to Oxford Languages.
If being a hero is about showing courage, bravery and strength, heroic feats happen all around us every day with ordinary people.
Redditor thejppass asked:
"What takes significantly more heroism than people recognize?"
People on AskReddit shared what they thought made a hero.
Going against the grain.
"Saying no in room full of people saying yes because there is a reason to say no."
"It's especially brave when you consider it goes against a lot of instinctual human behaviour."
"We are partially meant to agree with the masses, for social acceptance and a few other reasons. Or at least not act against the masses and make a big show."
"It helps to be aware of this in a way."
"It's even harder when you know there might be repercussions for going against your superiors."
Getting out of toxic relationships.
"To walk away from a toxic relationship."
"Toxic family relationships."
"I think a hard part of toxic relationships is that there was enough "good stuff" to get into the relationship in the first place, and often people try to stay in the relationship to fix it or patch it up to try to get back to the idealized good part."
"That's why it's so hard to walk away from those relationships, compared to someone you are indifferent to."
Walking away from a fight.
"Walking away from a fight, I have been in situations where people were provoking me and saying the most horrible things they could think of to get me to lash out, walking away from those situations and looking weak (even though it took more strength) was probably the hardest thing I have ever done."
"One incident that made me know I was in love with my husband was when we were dating and some asshole guy in a bar tried to pick a fight with him. Instead of getting into it he turned to me and said 'let's get out of here.' As we were walking away he said 'damn that guy was big I sure didn't want to have to fight him' and he got laid that night instead of getting his a** kicked."
Or maybe finishing the fight.
"Standing up to a bully."
"My biggest regret of my childhood is not beating the sh*t out of at least one of my bullies the countless chances I had, but to this day I understand why I didn’t. I vividly remember the feeling of fear and how small I’d feel in their presence. Could have easily taken a couple of them, but that wasn’t even an option in my mind as soon as I got to school every day"
Admitting when you're wrong.
"Admitting (to yourself most importantly) that you’re being selfish/are wrong about something."
"Sometimes admitting your not selfish can be just as hard for some people too."
When the party's over.
"Asking people to leave your house at the end of a party."
"We had this issue on New years eve. My girlfriend just started cleaning around everyone. She said it's the universal 'you ain't gotta go home but you gotta get the hell outta here.' It worked."
"Slap your thighs as you stand up and say 'welp..'"
"Being publicly vulnerable."
"Specially as a man... its easier to act though. We push people away while its lonely its far more manageable. If you show vulnerability the consequences are far worse. It takes a lot of courage. Its much harder to show vulnerability. I know it first hand."
Donating an organ.
"Donating an organ (while alive). It's a lot of time to figure out if you're a match, first off, going to lab tests initially then other health tests. Once confirm match, having to go through the procedure itself."
"You could be a healthy donor but then not so healthy after the procedure, or your donation may not go over well with the new host. But if it all works out, whether or not you know the person receiving the organ, it's an amazing thing."
"The guilt and the heart break when it doesn't go well I wouldn't wish on anyone."
Being a full time caretaker.
"Caring for a loved one 24/7."
"Being the long term caregiver for an ill family member."
Heroism comes in all shapes, sizes, and forms.
It's no surprise that some of the most brave acts are about being emotionally vulnerable and standing up for what you believe in.
As the saying goes, heroes don't always wear capes.
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They say good things come in small packages—as a lifelong member of the "Never hit 5 feet tall" club it's a phrase I've had thrown at me often.
It's right up there with "small but mighty" and "people mcnugget."
It's popular because there's a fair bit of truth to it, though.
When it comes to some things, smaller is just flat out better.
Reddit user RasheenHyuga asked:
"What’s something that’s better when it’s smaller?"
We expected—and skipped over—the talk about butt stuff. Nobody is here to shame the size queens.
We did not, unfortunately, expect nor skip over the stuff about spiders.
We had to read it, so now you do too.
Differing Dad Approaches
"Pills/capsules shaped medicines."
"I have this difficulties swallowing hard capsules/tablets, if I'm aware."
"My dad used to hide them into fruits so I was not too anxious about it and not too bitter if I had to chew them."
"As a child, my father said that I’d need to learn how to dry-swallow pills in case there’s a world war & clean water is rationed."
"Kittens and puppies. They’re so cute when they’re tiny and I just wanna pick them up and hug them all!"
"Kittens, because when they grow up, they become bitches."
"I'm gonna get hate but dogs."
"I really like little dogs because they're like little wolves...but not! They're pocket companions and, if trained properly, can be well behaved and loving!"
"Yeah, having a large dog that can do stuff is awesome - but having a mini wolf you can shove in your back pack and take wherever is even cooler in my opinion. You'll never be alone because they're portable!"
"On a subway? Pocket dog."
"In a store? Pocket dog."
"Riding a bike? Pocket dog."
"The amount of Uno cards you're holding"
"I wouldn't mind a few more if they are all wild cards"
"Especially if it’s a plus 4 or plus 2!"
"The amount of Uno cards you're holding - while also remembering to say Uno on the last card. Learn from my mistakes..."
Bills, Bills, Bills
"A duck would disagree with you."
"Hospital bills in the USA is the obvious answer."
"With the hospital bills in the US right now, I totally agree."
"I got some old painkillers, tweezers, hydrogen peroxide, liquor, gauze & duct tape. I'll be fine."
The Small C
"It's never good, but it's better if it's smaller. I had a low grade Glioma (pre-cancer, caught it early) scraped/removed out of my skull, hell ya!"
"Statistically 60% of people don’t know they have one until they have the first seizure. That's what happened to me but I had other symptoms like light sensitivity, vision rainbows, exhaustion, insomnia, etc."
"I work on a computer everyday and I happen to have light sensitive eyes. One day I had a seizure."
"Lots of tests, MRIS, cat scans, pet scan, brain scans. They found a mass of brain that was explained as a “black mold” of brain matter."
"Surgeon suggested removing it sooner rather than watching it slowly grow over time."
"My cancer was caught on a mammogram when it was too small for even my doctors to feel, and it was right under my skin."
No Good Stones
"I've never had one, just figured bigger object through peepee = more pain."
"Fun fact I learned from experience: smaller kidney stones are way easier to pass, but the pain of them getting to that point can be far more severe because they're more likely to be jagged in structure."
"Suffice to say I agree with this one, but only just barely cause nonexistent is the best size for a kidney stone. That sh*t hurts. lmao"
"Aaahh, human pearls."
Speaking Truths Over Here
"Potato wedges are crispier and have an overall better taste when they're smaller."
"First answer I have read that isn't just making a bad thing smaller but rather is increasing how good something is"
"Yes. See? A real answer. Something I can apply to my life. Unlike philosophical moral truths and magic shrinking debt."
Literal Small Packages
"I'm a postal worker - packages. If it fits in your box, fuck yeah. Time saved."
"I replaced my street side mailbox a few years ago. No real need to but I put in a much larger box."
"My postman stopped one day and thanked me for doing it."
"F*ck yeah, I love it when my postal worker fits their package in my box."
"That reminds me of a jazz song called 'I'm Your Mailman' "
"It's about postal workers and yes, there's LOTS of innuendo."
"Mini m&ms are so much better in my opinion."
"Damn I used to live mini M&Ms but they stopped selling them in my country."
"The tube they used to come in now comes with the regular size m&ms, which makes no sense cause you barely get any. What the hell is up with that?"
"Spiders and all arthropods"
"Are you sure? Demodex is a genus of tiny mites that live in or near hair follicles of mammals."
"Around 65 species of Demodex are known. Two species live on humans: Demodex folliculorum and Demodex brevis, both frequently referred to as eyelash mites, alternatively face mites or skin mites."
"They have no anus so they just live in your eyelash follicles until their own sh*t makes their exoskeleton burst and they die."
"You probably have some living on you right now, they're just too small for you to see."
OK, you know ... we were all good until the poopsploding mites that live on your eyelids.
Somebody always has to make it weird on Reddit.
I'm starting to wonder if it's a secret by-law or something.
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Everyone has their "type" when it comes to sexual attraction.
"What is something you cannot find hot or attractive no matter how hard you try?"
People discuss the looks and behavior that are off-putting to them.
"Everyone's typing sexual shiz, but here's mine: Ego. When someone thinks they're just a top of the line kinda person and know everything about anything? No, just no."
"Had a guy I had just started dating awhile back ask me about my job at the time. I was telling him about it, but he would interrupt me to try and CORRECT me on things he clearly had no idea about (and was also wrong about every time he opened his mouth lol)."
"When girls put lipstick above their lip line to make their lips look bigger."
"I don't respect people that can't color within the lines, didn't in first grade and don't now."
"Those huge pumped up lips on a woman."
And To Top It Off
"The female equivalent of a toupee."
"I feel like that's the kind of thing that's alluring because it conveys confidence until you actually get involved with someone like that and realize they're just an a**hole."
There's a certain way adult couples speak to each other that others find annoying and more fitting for a nursery room.
"If you think it’s bad coming from a girl try hearing it from a guy. !!"
"Girls doing baby voices, I was once fooling around with this very cute girl and she used a baby voice sounding like tweety bird and sh*t and I couldn’t recover, I had to cut her free, hope she found the right guy who’s into that."
"My ex would often talk in this very childish way of speaking, like trying to be funny and cute, and honestly I thought it was, until one day we were hanging out with her ex and her ex started talking like that and I was like….ohhhhhhh….I see."
When it comes to the bedroom, these activities were ones Redditors could do without.
"Scat.""Truth be told, I had an ex who loves being f'ked in the a**. But it wasn't till the 20th ish time I realized she only wanted it up the poop shoot If she had diarrhea. And unfortunately it ended up all over me. Then she'd lick it off. Every single time I went immediately limp and couldn't finish. I tried, but, no.""I tried because she was into it."– oO_SbowWulf_Oo
"Beep bobbly dee doot dah dah bup ba boodle doodle hee bat NOPE!"
It's A Fecal Thing
"Scat play. I'm not here to kink shame, but... Miss me with that sh*t."
Leave It For The Gastroenterologist
"Unsolicited internal organs shots."
Here's A Pisser
"She asked, I obliged, we broke up within a month."
We all have our preferences that draw us towards certain people.
What others find repulsive, others find totally sexy. That's the beauty of dating, though, isn't it?
There's someone for everyone.
For those of you who are single and still looking, don't lose hope.
Your unicorn is out there.
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