People in relationships have, at one point or other, made a huge mistake that jeopardized their future together as a couple.
Some grievances like infidelity are so beyond the pale that it's not worth continuing the relationship based on the ole' "once a cheater, always a cheater" adage.
But depending on the situation, do untrustworthy significant others deserve a second chance?
Strangers online gave their take on the issue when Redditor ChildhoodPersonal225 asked:
"People who forgave their cheating partner, what was the reason you let it go?"
Forgiveness doesn't always lead to a favorable outcome.
Moving On
"I forgave my cheating partner, but it was also the reason we got divorced. You can forgive someone and still not want to be with them anymore."
– thunder2132
Closure
"I forgave her after leaving."
– Any-Comfortable5682
No Regrets
"Me too. I spent a year or two upset about it, because she was in a happy relationship with the guy she cheated with. I spent that time hoping that she would do the same to him, almost certain that she would. Figured the other shoe would drop eventually and I could watch with great satisfaction from afar."
"That day never came. They stayed in love, they got married, they’ve got two daughters now. From everything I’ve heard, they have a wonderful life together. And I’m really glad that they do. What she did hurt at the time, and it was sh**ty, but we were a couple of 21 year olds who thought a three year college relationship was going to last forever. She didn’t deserve to spend her life paying for one time that she harmed me, and I didn’t deserve to waste my days waiting for karma to come back around and ruin her life."
"She got married to him the same day that I moved into an awesome apartment in my local city to live out my 20s in the most fun way possible. In a way, it felt poetic. Because of what she did, she found the person she was meant to be with and I was given the opportunity to seize life in a way I hadn’t before that."
"I wouldn’t change a thing about what happened and I have no doubt that she wouldn’t either."
– TwoForHawat
Forgiving and trusting someone again is a risk many people, who are still in love, take.
Understanding Why
"Because I was trying to understand why it is she made that decision, and I wanted to try and make the marriage work. My mistake."
Repeat Offender
"It almost always happens again. Give someone an inch, they take a mile. Next time they'll get better at hiding it."
– Celestial-Adventures
Unhealthy Cycle
"Not me but a friend. He didn’t want to be single again and go through the dating process. So he forgave. She cheated couple of times more and he still forgave. Ended up married. I stopped keeping up with the story because it’s always the same cheating sh*t again."
– realbobbygli
Alone For The Right Reason
"I thought that if I left her then I'd be alone forever."
"3 years after leaving her and that turned out to not be true and I also learned that being single is much better than being in a sh**ty relationship."
– TheNameless00
Things Didn't Compute
"Because I couldn't do math."
"We were dating for two months, but things got serious pretty fast. Met each other's families - this was around the holidays - and were having the talks about where we saw things going. One weekend, I come down with a really bad flu. Couldn't move out of bed, and told her I could not see her, but would be happy to talk on the phone. She tells me, 'hey, if its all the same, do you mind if I pick up another shift at the "piano bar" waitressing and make some money for the night?' I tell her, sure, I'd rather rest and try to kick this bug, go for it."
"Three months later, we're sitting on my couch and she seems distant. She tells me we need to talk, starts crying and tells me she thinks she has an STD. She tells me the night she picked up that extra shift at the bar, she stayed until closing and fucked her married boss in his car. But - and here's the kicker - she tells me, 'you and I had only been on a couple of dates up to that point and weren't exclusive,' so it wasn't like she was cheating on me, in her mind. For some reason, I couldn't put the math together to figure out which weekend it was that she took that extra shift, so I dismissed it. It wasn't until months later that the math hit me like an epiphany and, by that time, we had developed so much more as a couple that I figured it was a one-off indiscretion. (PS: She didn't have an STD, she had a yeast infection.)"
"In the end, I called things off. She was a pretty terrible person in the end, and may have cheated on me at least two more times by the time things were over. I wasted three and a half years of my life with her, but I never married her or had kids with her, which would have been way worse."
– MikeT75
The Fear Of Nothing Being Better Than The Alternative
"I was pregnant with my second child and terrified of doing it alone. I didn't think I was capable. I was also beaten down enough to feel like I'd never have anything better. Thankfully I wised up, it's been years now and I'm still single and may be that way for the rest of my days but it doesn't scare me like it did. I'm happy and that's all that really matters."
– Ambitious_Beat3549
Some people are suckers for emotional breakdowns.
Emotionally Influence
"I'm a sucker for crying. One year into our relationship she confessed in tears that she cheated on me two weeks into our relationship by having sex with her ex. I forgave her and was proud of her for being honest. Two months prior to our wedding and I find out she's been screwing her boss."
– gil_beard
Guilt-Ridden Husband
"My wife's first husband slept with a sex worker on a business trip to South Korea. He used to travel there several times a year, and it became a running joke with his co-workers that he never took part in the company-provided hook ups. So, he finally gave in on one trip, and felt utterly horrible about it."
"A lot of factors went into her forgiving him over this: He'd only been with my wife (since he was 17 an she was 15,) sexually, he felt absolutely horrible about it. What's amusing is that their two kids were very young, like 10 and 6, and my wife had a feeling that something was going on and had arranged for the kids to sing a little 'YAY! DAD'S HOME!' skit when he walked in the door..."
"They divorced about 10 years later for other reasons."
– dramboxf
Here's the thing about cheating.
Thrill Of Getting Away With It
"It is like an addiction issue. Junkies are junkies. The poison doesn't make a difference in behavior."
"Cheaters literally seek out all the time the thrill of flirting, secrecy, and yes, having power over someone else, knowing and doing something wrong and getting away with it."
"That is why most cheating couples just fizzle out when they get together after the original SO drops out. Having the poor sap / sappess getting duped is what kept them entertained, not the humping."
"Cheating doesn't just 'happen', people make it happen actively. That is why only rarely -if ever- a change actually occurs, because change doesn't happen unless the person wills it."
– gordito_delgado
Accidentally On Purpose
"My favorite is when people say 'it was an accident.'"
"You accidentally sent hundreds of texts, drove to their house, spent money on them and bounced up and down on them a few hundred times?"
"Yeah, sending a mixed signal is an accident not getting down with the whole act."
– musicalrssnroulette
It's Mind-Boggling
"It's still hard to wrap my head around how some people can be so emotionally unaware of what their actions do to others."
– MumrikDK
People deserve a second chance.
But based on the comments above, how do you know if the person you're trusting after they broke your heart aren't prone to making the same mistake again?
As they say, "fool me once..."
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People Break Down Which Things Are Illegal In Europe But Not In The U.S.
Whenever a person is getting ready to travel, one piece of advice they should always listen to is to read up on the local laws of the place they're visiting.
Because there are activities that might be acceptable back home that will land a person in jail in another country.
Curious, Redditor Judgmental_Squirrel asked:
"What is something illegal in Europe but not in the US?"
Baby Names
"In Denmark, we can't just name our babies anything we want. We have an approved names list to pick from. We can request a name that is not on the list but it rarely gets approved."
- Healthy_Highlight_71
No Medicine Commercials in Europe
"Pharmaceutical companies marketing directly to consumers."
- ConstantlySlippery
Aesthetic Dog Changes
"Docking dog's tails and cropping their ears."
- Penguinair
Also Cat Aesthetics
"Declawing cats. Most countries here do not allow that."
- DreamingDragonSoul
Crate-Training Animals
"In Germany and in other European countries, it's illegal to lock dogs in cages or crates for extended periods of time. As in daily while you are at work, for example. It's considered animal abuse."
"So many people in the US do this and I've always thought it was abusive. It amazes me how they justify it as, 'Oh, my dog loves the secure feeling of being in his crate' when it's only done for the owner's convenience."
- KookyPiccolo1661
Enough Said.
"Flamethrowers."
- squirrelrap69
Predatory Pricing
"Selling something below the price you bought it for (with the intention to sabotage other businesses). For example, Walmart tried to do this in Germany to destroy their rivals, but they failed miserably and completely retreated out of Germany."
- Lord_Gelthon
Washing Eggs Pre-Sale
"I'm in the US, and a former workmate has chickens as a hobby and gives away the eggs, unwashed. They are in the carton and obviously straight from the nest, because there are all sorts of particles of an output nature on the eggs."
"In Europe, eggs at the stores have sometimes a bit of poop or even feathers on them. Either rinse them before or just wash your hands after. But usually, they're quite clean."
- rncookiemaker
Not Okay in Europe
"Well, Colorado just made it legal to grow psychedelic mushrooms in your own home."
- ITRabbitHole
Additives in Food and Drinks
"Brominated vegetable oil."
- Marijn_fly
Satire Not Allowed
"In the UK at least, showing footage from parliament in a comedy show. More specifically, 'No extracts from parliamentary proceedings may be used in comedy shows or other light entertainment such as political satire.'"
"I only learned that when I tried to watch an episode of 'The Daily Show' that was blocked in the UK for that reason.US comedy shows can show congress all they want."
- Moctor_Drignall
No Sick Days
"This is the main reason I quit my job at Walmart. I had strep throat, so I got a doctor's note and asked that my absences be excused. The managers there refused, and so I quit."
"By the way, Walmart counts your absences as points against you. For example, if you're absent and call in to let them know, you still get a point. Get five points and you're fired. Really makes you feel like a worker drone in a dystopian novel."
- stellaluna-37
The Impact of Additives
"The US has a use it until it's proven harmful policy, and the EU the other way around. Prove it doesn't harm (in given and reasonable quantities) and you can use it."
"Fun fact, some friendly Americans after moving to Europe started realizing they did not suffer from suspected lactose/gluten/you name it intolerance but simply had their guts harmed by additives and seen their symptoms improve here. Check your additives, kids."
- ArtichokeFamiliar205
Candy Distribution
"Various ingredients found in lollies/sweets/candy e.g titanium dioxide. There are tighter restrictions on food production in Europe resulting in American companies having to alter their recipes so they can be sold in European countries."
"A lot of US-based companies partner with foreign companies to meet these laws (so the healthier versions rarely reach US soil). In French Polynesia for example, Coca-Cola partners with La Brasserie de Tahiti, and all of it is made with real sugar and sold in glass bottles that you return to any store for a discount on your next purchase."
"I can't remember for sure if the glass bottles are a law or just the standard for La Brasserie de Tahiti. Either way, it's a great example of how easy it is to cut our reliance on plastic. The public will adopt it quickly, it's really just corporate greed getting in the way."
- A0ma
Sale Sale Sale
"Artificially jacking up prices of things only to then put them 'on sale' when the sale price is really just the always-intended price."
- peachpinkjedi
While the word "illegal" may make most people think of illegal activities that a citizen might perform, most of the illegal acts here were in regards to public safety, as well as allowing the general public to live a healthier life.
The moment we find out there's no Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny is when we are forced to become adults.
We lose our childlike sense of wonder, setting many of us up for perpetual skepticism.
But since believing in these mythic heroes is commonly embraced by kids all over the world, it does provides a sense of relief that we all fell victim to the same ruse that brought so many of us plenty of joy.
However, there are specific situations where being gullible was embarrassing because no one else was as impressionable as you were. Sound familiar?
Curious to hear about our childhood, Redditor Keke_Dudu asked:
"What's the dumbest thing you believed as a kid?"
Redditors thought they were going to be violently pursued.
Potty Monster
"I would be in a perpetual state of fear on the toilet because I thought an alligator would bite my backside."
– aeiou-i-love-you
Flotsam & Jetsam
"I had a recurring nightmare that the eels from Little Mermaid were gonna come up the toilet and go for my butt."
– Greylings
Having active imaginations is nothing surprising...up until a certain age.
Sheep Exist For Real
"I thought sheep weren’t real when I was quite little. I thought they were mythical creatures like unicorns and dragons."
"My parents eventually figured this out and took me to a farm to see some real sheep, and my preschool brain was just like oh my god??? Are you fricking kidding me??? Sheep??? and was apparently just absolutely aghast at the sight of sheep."
– MatthewBrokenlamp
Fake News
"Not me, but my dad believed spaghetti grew on trees till middle school. All because he saw it on a TV commercial."
– KailerJ3304
Live And Work At One Place
"I thought ppl lived at their jobs. so mcdonald’s workers lived at mcdonald’s, teachers lived at school, etc. and that my parents just happened to be the exceptional weird discipline tactics."
– highuptop
Parents have wild disciplinary tactics.
Solo Snooze
"My parents had me convinced that if i don't learn to sleep alone when i was 8, I'd never be able to do it and I'll have to sleep with them even after I'm an adult. Idk why that scared me at that time but their little trick worked. Having a little brother is nice."
– kshay-
No More Loose Boogers
"My parents told me that they don’t let people who don’t know how to blow their nose into Disneyworld. We had a trip coming up so I learned fast. I truly thought that they had someone at the gate handing everyone a tissue to make sure they could blow their nose to be allowed in."
– OrangeTree81
Princesses Know How To Pee
"My daughter learned how to use the toilet real quick because I said only potty-trained kids could go to Cinderella's House. She didn't know we already had the trip to Disney booked, and I did not have a plan for if it backfired." - Reddit
What if these were true?
Conditional Teleporter
"A friend said he could teleport, just not when they were at school."
– Kerrminater
Delivering Bad News
"There was only one mailman. Idk wtf I was on but I remember telling my grandma 'look the mailman got on this side of town fast' she was like I know you don't think that's the same mailman. I said yea so she took me to the post office downtown and I saw all the mail trucks and was like oooooooooooo well I'm dumb."
– XxXWatchItAllBurnxXx
As a kid, I often psyched myself up and always thought of the worst case scenario.
My fears got the best of me when I went to camp as an eight-year-old.
The camp counselors would tell us about the "Unjai monster" or bigfoot snatching away the kids who didn't fall asleep when it was time for lights out.
I had the top of the bunk bed...right next to a window. I couldn't sleep that whole night because I was too afraid the Unjai monster would sense my restlessness and grab me through the window and take me deep into the woods and feed me to its family.
It was the worst.
I still can't tell if my bedsheets were soaked with night sweats or pee.
At the end of a long day, there is nothing better than unwinding to a TV show.
Escaping from your stressful reality for an hour or so, to catch up on a longtime favorite, or tune in to the premiere of a new show everyone's been talking about.
That is, until your relaxation abruptly stops, when something happens on the show that makes you want to scream uncontrollably at your screen.
Be it a decision a character made, a plot point that came out of nowhere, or realizing the episode you are watching literally makes no sense (most recent season of Riverdale anyone?), there is little more infuriating that witnessing a show ruin itself in one swift blow.
"What ruins a TV series for you?"
The Things Some People Get Away With
"Characters that do not make realistic decisions, and when there are no real consequences for characters who make bad decisions."- Sonarks
They're Not Quite Dead...
"When people keep dying and then coming back to life."- SuvenPan
They Could Do So Much Better
"Character A exhibits absolutely reprehensible behavior towards Character B, and then they both end up apologizing to each other even though Character A was the only one who did anything wrong?"- dreadnaut1897
Homer Simpson Reaction GIFGiphyYou'd Think They'd Have Learned By Now...
"Characters that don’t grow or learn anything from their experiences."- Embarrassed_Tax_6547
Not As Cute As People Think
"The 'super smart kid that talks like an adult' thing that so many horrible sitcoms do."- NastyLittleBagginses
There Can Definitely Be Too Much Of A Good Thing
"Two things."
"If they 'jump the shark' and the plot lines just get so f*cking ridiculous that, even for fiction you cannot suspend disbelief."
"When they just milk the f*ck out of it and run it into the ground with prequels, sequels, and off shoots."
"It's not the idea of making more series to build a 'universe', it's that most of the shows tend to suffer because the creative staff is being pulled in so many directions."
"Looking at you, 'Sons of Anarchy'/'Kurt Sutter' and 'Yellowstone'/'Taylor Sheridan'."- RunsWithPremise
sons of anarchy GIFGiphyThey Had So Many More Stories To Tell
"Premature cancellation."- poizn_ivy
"Netflix canceling it out of nowhere usually."- Howdydobe
We Can Only Suspend Our Disbelief So Much...
"When the story gets too outrageous."
"Like I watched a show about LAPD cops and they ended up going to Mexico to take down a drug lord."
"I’m like whaaaa? Why would the LAPD do that?"
"Lol."- Diesel-KC
What The Hell Snl GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy90% Of Writers Are Out Of Work At Any Given Time... And Yet...
"Bad writing, serialitis (where characters don't get to have arcs but become types of themselves because the cancellation/renewal cycle prevents writing a story with a beginning middle and end)."- Rememberwork
Give People Some Credit
"In Sci Fi shows where they are going to do something big and one guy has to explain it to the rest of the crew/group as if they're wall lickingly stupid."- The_Last_Ron1n
The Course Of True Love Never Did Run Smooth...
"Forced romances and drama from those romances."- JackOfScales
GIF by GoPlayGiphyLooking At You Jim And Pam...
“'Will they/won’t they?'”
"Garbage."
"Cut the bullsh*t and ask them out."- SaltySteveD87
We Know What You're Really Thinking
"When a guy reveals a pretty cool trait or secret and the girl says 'our whole relationship is based on a lie'."
"How about for once the girl says 'omg that's hot'."- Waste_Willingness461
Grow Up Already!
"Drama based solely on miscommunication, or characters that are overly jealous but it's painted as endearing."
"The writers think it's more entertaining to have their main cast act like a bunch of 1st graders when all the characters are in their 20s and 30s, but it's just annoying."- brightnessys
how i met your mother cheers GIF by WGN AmericaGiphyGenerally speaking, we like to indulge in TV shows that feature a reality far different from our own.
But there is a fine, fine line between Fantasy and stupidity.
...Seriously, can ANYONE explain the most recent season of Riverdale? We're begging.
Jane Austen famously taught readers not to judge others based on first impressions in her classic novel Pride and Prejudice.
As someone who may instantly turn you off when first meeting them could prove to be the love of your life.
That doesn't mean, however, that first impressions are always inaccurate.
Sometimes, we'll meet people who don't seem like the sort of person we would normally think we're going to be friends with but are willing to give them a second or third chance.
Only to discover that our suspicions were accurate, unfortunately.
Then, there are the times when it is loud and clear after one conversation that friendships with certain individuals are never going to pan out.
"Have you ever listened to a person talk for less than a minute and known you weren't going to get along with that person? What did they say?"
Merging Friend Groups Can Be Dangerous
"Yes this guy hopped into our discord group a few months back."
"He was a friend of a friend, but he didn't think to just add him to our server not our group chat."
"We all hop into a call and first thing he does is make some remarks that are very politically sensitive, sends some graphic photos and made some inappropriate remarks."
"Didn't expect to meet someone and have him offend 6 people in the span of 10 minutes."- tremors51000·
Offense Taken!
"Told me 'Yeah all women are b*tches, you included."
"No offense."
"Within the first 2 minutes of knowing me."- PotentialCranberry40
Lechery At It's Worst
"Years ago, me and my ex-husband went to see a movie with an older colleague of his."
"Before the movie we had dinner at like a chain restaurant/steakhouse type place, staff on the floor was all 20ish."
"I never met this man before but in the first few minutes of sitting down and looking at the menu he very confidently told us how he came there a lot and flirted with the female staff because 'they love the attention'."
"The best part?"
"His daughter worked there."
"All I could think was how I would literally cringe myself through the floor if I was 20 and my 50yo dad came into my place of work and perved on my co-workers because he didn't understand that they only put up with him 'cause they are paid to do so."- singingsilence
Alicia Silverstone Cherilyn Horowitz GIF by filmeditorGiphyJob Interviews Are A Two Way Street
"I was in a job interview once and the manager cut me off mid-sentence to jump to a weird conclusion.
"Him: 'What do you think the performance of this algorithm would be?'"
"Me: 'Oh, it'll be 'n' times--'"
"Him: 'Oh, you think it's going to be 'n'? You think it'll be 'n'??!! That's ridiculous, there's no way it would just be 'n'!'"
"Me: Uhhhh, you gotta let me finish speaking'."
"He then cut me off mid sentence twice more during our conversation."
"We... didn't get along."
"Dude was a total tool."- ArrenEnladCG
Meanwhile, They Could Tell They Wouldn't Be Friends
"'There are different levels to being a psychic, I'm on the purple level so I can talk to the dead'."
"Said a new employee at my previous job."
"Nope."- Lumisateessa
Duplicity Isn't A Good Look On Anyone
"They talk negatively about someone else in a very judgy way."
"There was this mom in my daughter's school who seemed to 'know" everyone, she talked to me and she spoke so bad about these people'."
"Then moments later I saw her interacting in a 'friendly' way, with those she was judging."
"My eyes rolled so much I could see my brain telling me not to get involved with her."
"And I was right, because by the time school year ends, her 'friends' hated her and they were talking behind her back too."- eveningsand14-1311
Go Away Goodbye GIFGiphyBarely Attempting To Hide Their Bigotry...
"'I know I'm not supposed to ask, but I need to know'."
"It's not for work or anything-- what religion are you?'"
"HR manager."- l0R3-R
Why Was She Even Invited?
"She showed up to a little get-together and the person who invited her said that they would be taking bets on who could sit with her for more than 30 minutes."
"10 bucks per person. Winner kept the pot."
"I assumed they were just being rude and planned to tell her of her 'friends' plans as soon as she showed up."
"She walked in, looked at me and scoffed, and asked if the grey car outside belonged to me."
"I said yes."
"She told me that with the money that car cost, I could have bought something nicer."
"Ok, well whatever."
"I went to get a drink and sat to watch the crowd gather around her."
"I already didn't like her but she went on to tell everyone about how she could never date someone who had a crappy credit score or couldn't pay their vehicles off after buying it."
"Someone who wanted to quit the contest asked for a cigarette, she opened up her purse and showed everyone a fresh pack of smokes and then told everyone why she doesn't smoke and why anyone who asks for a cigarette is either too broke to buy them or doesn't plan ahead of times."
"The guy asked her for one of her cigarettes, she said no and put them back in her purse."
"She talked about all the cars she 'bought' basically her parents would co-sign for her and pay the car off to build her credit and she would give them a few thousand to pay them back."
"She was nuts and wouldn't stop talking."
"I disliked her but was also fascinated with her. She was super weird."
"There was something like 15-20 people there and most entered the 'contest' I think the pot got up to 100-120 bucks."
"The winner was just some guy who I didn't know, he spent the money getting every one McDonald's and beer, so he was pretty cool."
"She was about 22-23, she had just finished getting her High School Diploma because she had dropped out to 'make money' according to her."
"I think she sold some milk shake things and fitness plans with some MLM."
"I'm not 100% what happened to her."
"She wasn't a my friend but she did show up to a few parties I was at and she seemed calmer."
"She used to bring her own bottle of liquor and wouldn't share which was kind of funny because on one occasion they caught her filling her bottle with a bottle of jack that some one had brought and left on the kitchen counter, but she swore that all she drank was Hennessey and Fireball."- Commentingunreddit
Cecily Strong Reaction GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphyIt Is Never Attractive To Gloat
"I was listening to the NEXIVM podcast and the clip of the founder saying he has 225 IQ."
"If I walked into a room and heard someone say that I’d walk right back out."- Fabulous-Bandicoot40
Can't Say The Same About You Though...
"'You don't scare me'."
"Wasn't trying to scare you in the slightest."- That49er
Scared Saturday Night Live GIF by HULUGiphy...Both Could Still Be True...
“'Some people might say I’m an a**hole but I just tell it how it is'.”
"99% chance they are an a**hole that I don’t want to be around."- ProudMany9215
Negative Influence
"Was a customer at work, naturally I wouldn’t be friends."
"But even in a setting where we could become friends it wasn’t happening."
"I came up to her to see if she had any questions about our critters (I work in a pet shop) and the very first thing she asked was if parakeets could talk because she wanted to teach them racial slurs."
"Biggest nope of my life."- Quitechsol
It's fair to think that everyone deserves a second chance.
However, second chances must be earned, and not everyone is worthy of them.