Forest Rangers Reveal The Creepiest Experiences They've Had On The Job[rebelmouse-image 18349544 is_animated_gif=
Being a Forest Ranger is a job so many of us no NOTHING about. Apparently though we've been missing out. It's a job full of adventure.. maybe too much adventure. It seems it can be a job riddled with danger. Bears are EVERYWHERE people!
Redditor UpbeatAvocado wondered aloud... Forest rangers of Reddit, what is the creepiest/strangest experience you've had while on the job? Lord these people are NOT paid enough. If we all want to go enjoy a natural park or forest, we have to hep these people.
SWIPE RIGHT MOOSE!
Had campers who honked at a moose. The moose took this as a mating call and proceeded to mate with their car.
THIS ISN'T FOR GEICO...[rebelmouse-image 18349545 is_animated_gif=
Dude. Tourists do amazingly dumb things. I live in Australia and a few years ago I visited a local national park that had a waterfall. On the way back from a swim I heard people laughing and saw a group of backpackers all huddled around a rather large iguana (large monitor lizard, smaller than a Komodo dragon but mean looking). They were trying to get a selfie with it. They must have seen the look of horror on my face because one of them asked "Can...can we pet it?" and I was like "sure" because you can physically pat one. They are real but there isn't a bone in my body that would want to pat a lizard the size of a medium-sized dog that's all jacked on discarded junk food and used condoms. Anyway, they touched it and it went a bit silly but no one was hurt (badly).
CALIFORNIA HERE WE COME![rebelmouse-image 18349546 is_animated_gif=
I'm a forester for the US Forest Service in northern California.
I've never had anything like supernatural type creepy happen to me. But it always creeps me out a little bit when I come across a kill site from a Mountain Lion. When you're by yourself in the woods you're just another link in the food chain but you don't really think about it until you come across a 1/2 eaten deer and realize a huge cat killed this thing with its face.
As for the strangest thing, that would be the time I thought I was about to see a plane crash. As usual I was working alone on a remote hillside and I saw a plane, like a full size commercial plane flying below the ridgeline between mountains. I thought it was going to crash for sure. But it didn't. It just weaved through and kept going. I thought it was weird it didn't have any logos or writing on it. Come to find out we were close to an Air Force base and they were training pilots for Afghanistan and this was not a totally uncommon thing to see in the area.
THAT IS CYOTE UGLY...[rebelmouse-image 18349547 is_animated_gif=
I live out in the country and frequently hike trails on an 100+ acre property. I come across a lot of coyote kill sites, it doesn't really bother me any more... It's a part of nature and all that.
But I've never thought of it how you described it and now I'm terrified.
IT'S JUST WATER..[rebelmouse-image 18349548 is_animated_gif=
i spent a few weeks on a long camping trip in a national forest near a navy site for bombing practice.
the shock waves from the water bombs hitting would shake the tents. it was pretty cool.
JUST RUN!![rebelmouse-image 18978032 is_animated_gif=
My friend and I were going through a more secluded part of the woods off of the trail. We planned to head back soon since the sun was setting and shadows were getting longer - I know it doesn't sound like much, but understand that everything gets creepier when you're surrounded by miles of forest.
Then, we noticed it: in the distance was a small wooded platform, a bit rundown. It looked like a man-made structure, completely out of place, and I'd never seen anything like it. I remember we approached with caution and even radioed it in; apparently, nobody had ever seen it before or knew what we were talking about. We didn't have to get very close- the smell hit both of us like a freight train, I felt like I was going to puke. There are no words to sufficiently describe how foul it was. It was the scent of rotten flesh and death but millions of times worse. At that point, we were both seriously spooked and decided to leave since it was getting late, plus we'd already reported it anyway.
Found out that when rangers checked, they discovered a couple things. First, the scent was actually caused by severely mutilated small animal corpses, ravaged and left to rot around the mysterious platform. Next, they collected several bear set traps surrounding it, even though there are no bears here. They uprooted the platform and found the entire thing was a trap, basically because the boards were weak and a deep pit had been dug underneath it with metal shards waiting at the bottom.
JUST GO ALONG WITH IT...[rebelmouse-image 18978033 is_animated_gif=
Prior Marine, we were doing amphibious landings and set up to rack out on the beach. I woke up and walked over the sand dune to take a pee in the middle of the night when I saw a squad of recon guys geared up with night vision goggles maybe ten feet away from me. I said what the hell pretty loudly and none of them said anything. I walked up to one guy and had to physically touch him before he said they were practicing on us. I told my platoon commander about it and the next day he told me they failed because I noticed them. Startled the s*** out of me though, I was halfway through my piss before my eyes adjusted enough to notice 10 or so guys just watching it go down. Would have died for sure.
CAN YOU HEAR US?[rebelmouse-image 18978034 is_animated_gif=
When I was working for a federal government land management agency in Montana a few years back, something really creepy came over the repeater network. While we were working in a canyon that had very poor radio reception, we heard a very long, creepy, and drawn out moan come over the air. This was followed by a very weak (in both reception and tone) "...help...me..." in a women's voice. All of us freaked out. These weak cries for help kept repeating low guttural "...help me..."on until dispatch finally stepped in a said "This is a federal emergency network. Unless you have an emergency, get off this channel." This was followed by another plea for help, then a gun shot and screaming. Turns out 2 local crazies were out four wheeling, going straight up steep embankments, when the ATV flipped backwards, pinning the man under the ATV. Both of them being high on some substance, they started freaking out. The man, being perfectly fine, except for being pinned by the leg and high, started to hallucinate that he was bleeding out, pulled out his handgun and shot himself to make it quicker. Because they were four wheeling so far back in the sticks, a helicopter was needed to retrieve the body.
BLAME CANADA![rebelmouse-image 18357827 is_animated_gif=
I work as a forester in northern Alberta (Canada). One of the weirder things I've found was an old rusted toboggan in an area of forest that had recently been harvested. It had obviously been there before the forest was cut, because it had about 3 inches of soil on top of most of it with plants growing out of it. This was also 15-20 kilometres off the highway, and not near any well used trails or roads.
W. T. F?![rebelmouse-image 18348500 is_animated_gif=
Forester here; running into fresh mountain lion and bear scat and tracks is always creepy, but I'm most afraid of other people. I started carrying a gun (which is against my companies policy) after one particularly unsettling run in. I normally work alone but on this day I had a coworker with me, I stepped out of his sight for a bathroom break. We were way off the grid, thought we were the only people for miles. All of the sudden I see a man standing motionless about 20-30 feet from me- I scream in obvious terror. He doesn't say a word, and I'll never be able to accurately describe the look on his face. It was pure evil, I could feel his intent. He takes a step TOWARDS me at which point my coworker yells "Are you ok?," the guy then just turns around and walks away, disappearing back into the woods. I'm a woman btw, and I know for a fact if I had been alone that day he would have attacked me.
Another creepy one was when I was patrolling in a swamp in SC and my boss just happened to fly overhead in a helicopter while conducting an aerial patrol, I could see him in the 'copter waving his arms, I'm waving back smiling like _"hey buddy! I see you!" _My cell rings and it's my boss telling me to get back in my vehicle (amphibious Argo) because I'm walking towards a 10-12 ft alligator. Super creepy because god knows how many I'd been close to in the past, not a normal day to have a helicopter scouting for me.
Strangest thing I've come across was a huge pile of dental molds (like the kind orthodontists make) in the middle of no where. About 3 ft high, thousands of messed up grills. I love weird, random s*** so it made my day. I took like 30 of them and would randomly leave them around town with stupid quotes written on the bottom, kept them stored in the driver side door so people would be like"WTF" when they noticed lol. My friend that happened to be a dental assistant saw them one day and explained that they are expensive to dispose of? So a shady dentist just dumped 'em.
Another time I had just stepped out of the woods when a fish dropped from the sky and landed right in front of me... I was super confused until I saw the hawk that was carrying it fly away.
DEEP BREATHS AND KEEP MOVING...[rebelmouse-image 18346830 is_animated_gif=
I do a lot of of solo hiking and I've seen some weird s***. I actually had a what the hell moment this weekend..
Decided to wake up super early and hike into this a great little fishing spot in Uwharrie national forest. Now I am probably a good 8-10 miles from anything or person. As I come over this hill I see a hoodie hanging up about 25 ft in a tree and an axe head at the base of the tree. The hoodie was on a branch that is couldn't of been thrown or even placed up there if someone climbed.. the limb would of snapped. I just took the safety of my pistol and kept walking. Nothing you can really do that far out..
NOT SAFE PEOPLE![rebelmouse-image 18348506 is_animated_gif=
Not me, but my ex works in the National Parks. Trees with low limbs, waist high, cut off about a foot away from the trunk.....with used condoms rolled on the ends.
THAT'S NOT SMOKEY!![rebelmouse-image 18978035 is_animated_gif=
I used to be a ranger for a cave park. One morning, I walked up to our caves to unlock them as a lot of our caves are gated to protect them from vandalism. As I'm walking up, I feel just...weird. I go unlock the cave and as I head back down I realized that the metal boardwalk under my feet feels and sounds different. I walked up and down it a few times trying to figure out exactly what was different but no luck. I decide to head back down to our visitor center and ask the first tour of the day to check on it and see if they notice anything. As I'm heading down the stairs I glanced back up at the cave, and the great big bloody bear that had been snoozing under the boardwalk sticks his head out.
OLD TALES.. DON'T ASK..[rebelmouse-image 18344995 is_animated_gif=
I was in the Black Hills of South Dakota in 2015 with some friends. We came into a clearing about 12 miles into a very remote part of the BH. There was a noose hanging in a tree. The rope was old and mossed over. No other evidence of humans around. Just plain creepy.
LEAVE IT IN THE GREENERY....[rebelmouse-image 18346863 is_animated_gif=
I worked as a botanist for the park service- as a scientist you still wear the uniform. My field partner and I were surveying some plants- and a super old dude walks up - we chat a bit and he tells us he's in his 80s and been hiking there forever. He seems pretty tough and with it from the conversation.
Cut to an hour or two later - he's on his way back - but his pants have disappeared and he's just wearing a (thankfully) long tank top - no pants or underwear. He waves and keeps going. Since you can only be cited for being naked in parks if someone complains- we wave and continued surveying plants. Never really figured out what happened- maybe an restroom emergency or he just wanted to feel the breeze.
IM NOT THOR! YOUR'E ON YOUR OWN![rebelmouse-image 18978036 is_animated_gif=
Worst story for me was when three bears entered our campsite at like 2:00 in the morning when we were sleeping in a tiny little tent. Pitch black outside, but we were high up the mountain, so when laying in the tent, you could see the moon light filtering through the thin plastic of the tent and the silhouettes of the trees and stuff.
So my friend and I were in one tent and the guys were in another tent a few feet away from us. We are awoken to banging sounds in the campsite, about 3 or 4 feet from where we are laying. We both looked at each other and held hands because it was LOUD. I was terrified to move because the sleeping bags would make that rustling sound if we moved. I swear to god, the bears were FASCINATED with our tent. Now, we did go through all the hassle of setting up a bear proof camp, even washing the sun screen off of us, putting food and self care items and chap sticks and stuff in the food canister and such. We did everything we knew to do so that we did not smell good to bears, but I think just camping that far up gets their attention, period. These things literally were making grunting noises, throwing items around the camp, and rubbing themselves along the side of our tent. Like I could hear the sound of their bristled fur rubbing against the side of our tent over and over and over. I will NEVER forget that sound. When I would open my eyes and look up, you could see their HUGE grunting silhouette rubbing against the side of the tent. It was like the scariest 30 minutes of my entire life. Three GIGANTIC bears were a mere inch away from me and the only thing that separated us was the thin plastic of the tent that they could shred in in half a second.
After what seemed like an eternity, they wandered away, and the guys came flying into our tent carrying the gun. We huddled there, all four of us like terrified school girls, until the sun came up. When we took a look at the camp, everything that had been sitting out (mostly bags and clothes and non-food item stuff) was destroyed and scattered. I never went camping again after that experience. It terrified me. Before that, I never really thought what was out there. Now I know!!
KEEP A TRUE NORTH...[rebelmouse-image 18346862 is_animated_gif=
Every summer I work on a national park just to get a little extra cash for college.
So last year I decided to say okay and solo a 7ish mile hike up the mountain to get back to my dorm. This is after having a few days off, and instead of being late the next day waiting for a ride I decided I was gamed enough to venture the forest at night
So here I am alone crossing makeshift bridges, and going along a makeshift trail in the middle of an pitch black evergreen forest.
Along the way I come to a small rocky River bank, I look up and see a blood moon looming over head. For some reason I felt a wave of anxiety wash over me like I just f***ED up big time.
Hours pass, in turn with me getting lost and my flashlight dying. I kept seeing a shadowy figure in my peripheral, pointing to something. Wasn't a good time, as I was already on the look out for bears and mountain lions, plus being exhausted.
YOGI? IS THAT YOU?[rebelmouse-image 18978037 is_animated_gif=
I've been working at this park for a few years, and I've been having issues. It's this bear, and he isn't like any other bears. HE STEALS PIC-A-NICK BASKETS FROM THE CAMPERS!
Everyone has their travel bucket list.
The list of places they absolutely must visit before they die.
There are those, however, who also have a rather different list of destinations.
The places that have no intention to visit.
Be it for safety concerns, language barriers, or simply that there's nothing at these places that calls to them, there are places some wouldn’t dream of spending the time and money to visit.
Redditor TrooperJohn was curious to hear which places were at the very bottom of the list of travel destinations for his fellow Redditors, leading them to ask:
"What is a popular tourist destination you have no interest in visiting?"
Oasis in the desert? No thank you.
"Why and whats special about it?"
"Its a modern city in a desert."- Maximum_Calendar_791.
"A fake city with fake people, no human rights, where the world's tallest buildings hide corruption and slavery in their shadows."
"It's like someone decided to take every problem of mankind and concentrate it in one spot."- PayNoNoticeOfMe.
"Dubai one i think it is ugly two I would die in two minutes of me being there I can't stand anything above 40 c°."- BookWormPerson.
One of the seven wonders is one too many for me.
"The pyramids. "
"Too many horror stories of Egypt."- Aemiom.
"Not really a destination, but taking a cruise."- Shortbus_Playboy.cruise ship vacation GIF by Hallmark ChannelGiphy
Mountains aren't really my thing.
"You use a bunch of money to get in there them come down."
"And trash your whole way there. It's literally a corner in the Earth insufferable for humans and we still made a way to go there to trash it."- ACLullaby.
It's in my own backyard... but still not interested.
"I have lived about 15km away from the Burj Khalifa ever since it was made."
"I could not care any less besides the occasional pointing out the 'shiny tall building' to my nieces.- legolosss.
The pictures are enough for me.
"Friends who've made the journey to Mount Rushmore mostly say it was no big deal and not worth the effort or expense to travel there."- Back2Bach.States Selfie GIF by Ethan BarnowskyGiphy
Hustle and Bustle? No thanks.
"Whether it's cities, structures, I don't care."
"I'd rather go to a boring empty quiet place than a place full of people."- TheSmeep.
They're watching us.
"That creepy a** place in Japan with all the realistic dolls."
"No thank you."dolly dearest horror GIF by absurdnoiseGiphy
Some dream of paying a visit to these places.
Others hope they never have to set foot there, and will choose to leave it to the other millions of tourists.
To each, their own.
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When it comes to electing a leader, the choice is an easy one if a potential candidate shares the same values as yours.
And while a candidate is fit to lead remains to be seen, we rely on our instinct to choose someone with whom we can relate.
But sometimes, our options are limited and we inevitably go with someone who is the lesser of two evils.
Curious to hear from strangers online about a hypothetical, Redditor Cashmeresquid2309 asked:
"Americans of Reddit, would you vote for an openly Atheist presidential candidate? Why or why not?"
Redditors were quick to point out the answer was a no-brainer.
We Already Know The Answer
"Asking Reddit if they'd vote for an atheist..."
"I feel like the answer would be obvious."
"Americans of Reddit, would you vote for a Star Wars fan who heckin loves doggos?"
For The Atheists In The Crowd
"Atheists of atheistville, would you vote for an open atheist?"
Others weighed in with a range of opinions.
"Better to ask the question in r/conservative"
"What's funny is how many of them would probably say no, even though they voted for Trump and would do so again. Say whatever else you want about him, but I seriously can't understand how anyone could genuinely believe Trump is a Christian. He's so obviously faking it and is undoubtedly the most atheistic president we've ever had or are likely to have for a long time."
"This is a guy who's never even so much as read the Bible or attended church, who told a conservative radio host his favorite Bible verse was 'an eye for an eye', who told evangelical interviewers that he's never asked God for forgiveness because he's never done anything wrong, and who routinely commits all 7 deadly sins (pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony and sloth) without remorse."
From A Different Perspective
"Not an american but interestingly according to this survey on 1006 people from 2007, being atheist was the worst thing you could be as a candidate (of the things asked) with only 45 % of people saying they'd vote for one."
An atheist candidate isn't necessarily a big strike.
"I wouldn’t not vote for someone just because they were atheist."
"This is it. If they’re running on platforms I support with a history to back up those campaign promises, I don’t care if they belong to the church of the flying spaghetti monster. They could literally be a member of the satanic temple and I, an actual practicing Christian, would give less shi*s than a constipated sloth."
"Edit: yes, I realize the Satanic Temple does not actually worship satan. I used it for that purpose. The Church of Satan has some…problematic views and I probably would not vote for someone who literally holds a platform of eugenics."
Some view the role of religion in politics as important.
"Religion can be relevant: I would have strong reservations about voting for a Scientologist, even if I agreed with the policies they proposed. I would have strong reservations voting for a member of an apocalyptic cult or, possibly worse, a follower of the (highly heretical) 'prosperity gospel,' which unfortunately includes more and more so-called 'evangelicals' — I didn't vote for George W. Bush, but it's not because he was an evangelical."
"It depends on the role: I'd probably be more flexible with a legislator than an executive (mayor, governor, president), as their character is IMO more important than for a legislator and their policy stances somewhat less important relative to a legislator."
"Satanic temple — well, that's just an organized group of atheists and humanists with an intentionally inflammatory choice of name. They're generally fine people."
A Bad Rap
"The Satanic Temple is an excellent organization that every decent person should be able to respect. A Church of Satan member, not so much."
"There's a huge difference between them!"
And Redditor boganvegan said it best.
"Better an open atheist than a fake Christian."
It all boils down to trustworthiness. Without full transparency, how could anyone put their faith in a candidate who spews nothing but lies?
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Being home alone isn't always the most tranquil thing.
No one is there to help or protect you.
And things that go "bump" in the night... sometimes they do more than bump.
Redditor ag9910 wanted to hear about the times home felt like an unsafe place to be. They asked:
"What is the scariest, strangest, most unexplainable thing that has happened to you while home alone?"
I'm always freaked out when I'm home alone. Lights on. Yeah, my electric bill is high.
Dorothy?Wind Conan Obrien GIF by Team CocoGiphy
"I dreamed the front door blew open at the exact time the house alarm went off... I hopped up and sure enough, the front door was open. No intruder."
I See You
"Not home alone but only one in right side of the house. Went to my mom's bathroom to wash my hands and saw a pair of feet behind the half open door. Laughed and said 'very funny Ma, I see you.' then finished up and left. Bumped into my mother in the kitchen unpacking, nobody else was in the house. I'm glad whatever was behind the door didn't peek out."
"One night I had forgotten to lock my apartment door and woke up in the middle of the night. My bedroom door was about 2 feet from my front door, as you walked into the apartment. First a big dog ran by, then a person. Holy crap I was so scared and I screeched 'Who is it?!?!!'"
"A man said 'It’s Doug!' As I was thinking to myself, who the f**k is Doug, he said 'oh, crap.' He turned around to go back out the front door saying 'Sorry.' I asked 'Didn’t you have a dog with you?' He said 'Oh, yeah. Hey, c’mon!.' He left, his dog ran out after him and I locked my front door."
"Edit: glad you all thought this was funny, because I did too, once my heart quit trying to beat right out of my chest! The next day the girls at work thought I was crazy for not being upset, but eh, done is done. Peace!"
"My sister and I were home alone and we heard someone big running up the stairs. The stairs make lots of noise with slight pressure so when there’s someone big on them you can tell. I went out of my room to check but saw no one anywhere and my sister also came out of her room and she asked if that was me I said no and we both looked around to see if there was anyone but found no one in the whole house. We were confused and called our parents and just waited until they got back and that was that."
I See YouStaring I See You GIF by QuikTripGiphy
"I very clearly saw a guy walk into my room. But when I went after him there was nobody there. I checked in the closet, under my bed, everywhere one could hide in my room."
This is why home video surveillance is key.
"NO"Season 5 No GIF by The OfficeGiphy
"My parents were on a road trip, just left, and I sat down at my desk. I thought 'Weekend alone by myself' and a voice yelled into my right ear 'NO' so loud it hurt."
"I managed to lock myself out of my house on my birthday during a tornado while trying to bring my cats to the basement for safety. I later found out that the tornado was approximately a couple miles or less from me at that exact time. The sky was green and it got weirdly calm and then I could hear what sounded like a train coming before I found an unlocked window to climb through. Wild times."
Saturday morning in the 80s...
"I wasn't home alone but I was awake by myself one Saturday morning in the 80s when I was around 7 or so. I believe my mom was the only one home because my dad went to the lake to go fishing that weekend, and I'm not sure where my older brothers were, maybe they went with him, idk."
"Anyways, my mom's sleeping in, and I'm in the living room by myself, watching Saturday morning cartoons and making a fort out of sheets and cushions. Something made me turn around and I saw my dad in his pajamas standing in the hallway entrance with his hands on his hips, looking the mess I was making and shaking his head."
"He then turned around and walked into my room, which was just off the hallway entrance. Dude. I didn't even look, I just booked it to my parents room and woke my mom up. I don't remember what happened after that, this was around 35 years ago. And yes, my dad was fine, nothing had happened to him."
Get the Bat...
"I was at home by myself on a call with some friends when all of a sudden my dog begins to bark like crazy, which was odd since it was the middle of the night and he's usually sleep. I go downstairs to check on him and find him barking at our hall closet, terrified I grabbed my bat that I keep in my room just in case and open the door. There was nothing out of usual at first at then I look down and notice a familiar looking object at the bottom of the closet."
"It was my mom's necklace she had lost when I was 9, (i'm 15 now just to put in perspective how long it's been). I showed it to my mom at breakfast and she was just as shocked as I was. I still have no clue how it got there or how my dog knew it was in there, definitely one of the oddest occurrences of my life."
MeowHappy Cat GIF by ChubbiverseGiphy
"Many years ago, I was 14 or so, my first night alone in the house when my parents were out. Lying on the living room floor reading, my cat sleeping next to me."
"Suddenly, cat wakes up, stares intently into the dark corner of the room behind me, hair on end, growls and then bolts out of the room and upstairs. I look behind me and see nothing, but follow cat upstairs and hide under the covers. Freaked me out."
Thank God for alarms. I hate being home alone.
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The human body is still such a mystery.
How much do we really know?
Not a lot apparently. We're learning more all the time.
And most of it is gross.
Redditor BathNo7713 wanted to discuss the ick factor of anatomy. So they asked:
"What is the most disturbing fact about the human body?"
The body freaks me out. But it's all I've got. So teach me some things.
"The fastest killing virus takes around 4 days to kill you. That would be Ebola. Your immune system can kill you in 15 minutes."
"If your brainstem (the part of the brain that mediates most motor control for all of the body) is damaged, you can get 'locked-in' syndrome. That means you're fully conscious and aware of your surroundings but unable to move or speak. The only muscles that remain unaffected in most people are the muscles that move they eyes and the eyelids."
"You're essentially trapped within your own body with your only way of communication being blinking or moving your eyes It can be caused by toxins, blockage of the basilar artery which is the main artery of the brainstem, or other brainstem damage."
"Some people suffer from Exploding Head Syndrome, which causes them to hear a loud bang when they wake up."
"When I was younger I believe I experienced this a few times. Sounds I heard were: about a million people talking and laughing all at once, a train that irl would've been about a foot away from me based on the volume of the sound, and a door slamming loudly."
"Not sure if this is by design, but I totaled my car once, almost completely uninjured somehow. Then I looked down to my right hand which I remember jabbing into my dashboard at 55mph. Luckily (unluckily?) only my pinky took the blow. But instead of a floppy-udder full of bone-sand, my pinky was 0.5 inches long."
"Broke no bones, but instead perfectly stacked my phalanges, or finger bones, INTO my hand. This is fixed by a muscular Russian murse grabbing your pinky with both hands and pulling very hard. God I wish they gave me more lidocaine."
Functionsanimation art GIFGiphy
"If you have a surgery where they need to move your organs around they might not function for a day as the body assumes that they are dead."
Move things around? You mean that's not fake when it happens on "Grey's Anatomy?"
GrossBasketball Wives Ugh GIF by VH1Giphy
"It is always making disgusting body noises."
"The only reason you are not aware of it is because the ambient noise kind of drowns it out because your ears focus on it. If you go to one of those super-silent rooms that absorb all sorts of sounds, it is a really weird way to reacquaint yourself with your body."
"Idk about the most disturbing but how bad human teeth are. We’d think it’s our sugary and processed diets these days that cause it, but even Otzi the iceman discovered in Italy was found to have terrible teeth, mouth diseases and cavities. It’s odd that even with the most basic of diets our teeth are so bad."
In the bowels...
"I noticed this after my abdominal surgery. When I turned over in bed my guts seemed to fall from one side to the other. Mentioned to my doc and she confirmed it was my bowels rearranging themselves."
"Apparently the doctor just throws your intestines back in there higgeldy-piggeldy because there isn't a correct way to pack them neatly."
A Quick Burst
"There are a vast number of ways that your body can malfunction and kill you with little or no warning. An aneurysm can go undetected until it bursts and kills you. Getting hit in the chest just the right way can stop your heart. You can encounter an allergen that never previously provoked an immune response that freaks out your body so badly that you die. You literally just never know if your body will just... die."
The body is such a conundrum. Sexy and gross all at once.
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