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Non-Americans Share Their Local 'Bigfoot' And 'Area 51' Equivalents

Non-Americans Share Their Local 'Bigfoot' And 'Area 51' Equivalents

Non-Americans Share Their Local 'Bigfoot' And 'Area 51' Equivalents

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Of course you do. It's an American cultural legend. Almost a ghost story--it's a clear cover-up by the government with no true explanation. Only theories. It's almost fun to stew on. But every country must have something like this, right?

ekrgekgt asked Reddit:

Non-Americans of reddit, what is the "Bigfoot" or "Area 51" equivalent of your country?

Here are some culturally diverse urban legends.

Dahut

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In france we have a mythical creature in the mountain regions called a "dahut". What's funny is that it supposedly has shorter legs on one side, either left or right, to accomodate the slopes he lives on. So if you encounter one, you just have to shout, which causes him to turn around, thus falling down because the long legs are now on the top side of the slope... That flaw makes them a rare sight and an endangered species.

Ghost Train

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In Stockholm (Sweden) we have a half finished metro station that you just pass through. It is rumored that there is a ghost train called Silverpilen (the silver arrow) traveling to that station. If you accidentally board that train your die and your ghost is trapped on the train forever.

Missing

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Slovakia here - There's a myth of Bermuda triangle like phenomenon in mountains (or perhaps hills) of Tríbe?. It is nothing but few hills, forest and it is really hard to get lost there, because of its small size in square kilometres, but few people went missing there and were never found.

Sirens

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Grew up in a rural part in the south of Norway. When I was a kid my parents and other adults would tell us stories about "Nøkken". A water creature that would lure you to the water and drown you. I remember the dad of my bestfriend telling me they could come through the toilet and drag you through to your death.

Méxicante

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Mexico has "La Llorona" (the crying woman), who's basically a Mexican banshee lady who lives in the countryside.

Also, el Chupacabra, a beast said to suck the blood of farm animals.

Abandonment

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In the Netherlands we have a bunch of military bases, which you can all look up on google maps and see the satellite pictures of, but there's this one area of a military school they felt the need to scramble. [link].

I've been in that area once (you can just walk to it, it's about as secure as a regular school), and there's nothing interesting there. It seems like a leftover they forgot to 'undo' when in the past they blurred every military area, but many people in the area think they train special marines there, which I highly doubt.

Unidentified Flying Mountain

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Oh boy, I was waiting for this question to be asked.

I live in a small city in Serbia, Zaje?ar. About 35 km away from me is a pyramid shaped mountain called Rtanj . And why that mountain is popular, besides that strange shape is because there are rumors that aliens land there. But, the fun part is, there were lots of UFO sightings over Rtanj and over my home town too. Even I saw a couple of UFO's flying over the mountain. Scientists have gathered a couple of times to investigate what is happening over there. And the only thing they have said is that the UFO's might be lightning balls, although they don't know why they're forming on the mountain.

Now, I will try my best to describe them. My whole family has seen them, since our balcony is directly facing the mountain , and all of them behave and look the same way. Small circles that are moving extremely fast in similar patterns, their paths are usually like geometrical shapes. They also change color, and after travelling for a couple of minutes, they disappear into thin air, sometimes they can even reappear in a different place. Note: the sky was always clear, no clouds were near those things

Ogopogo..ie?

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We've got the Ogopogo in Okanagan lake in B.C. Canada. It's kinda like the Loch Ness monster except... wait no there's pretty much no difference

Ghosts

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Lots of them in Galicia, Spain. The one that scared me the most as a child was the myth of the "Santa Compaña":

The common belief is that of a procession of the dead (or a procession of souls that are in torment) that wander through the village paths of a parish beginning at midnight wearing white, hooded cloaks. The procession is led by a living person carrying a cross or a cauldron of holy water (sometimes he carries both), followed by several of the souls of the dead holding lit candles. The living leader of the procession is compelled by a supernatural force (in this case, a mysterious curse) to go out every night and walk by towns, villages and forests; but having no recollection of it the following day. By the same token, because the living person is unaware of what he is doing, there is no chance that he will renounce his duty in leading the Santa Compaña as the curse that forces him to lead the procession puts him into a trance every midnight.

The region of Galicia is pretty similar to Ireland, they even share to a certain degree some Celtic traditions. My parents told me that the rainy weather, the fog, etc... was the origin of such stories.

More Than The Yeti

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India

We have Yeti, a snowy figure which is rumored to live in the Himalayas.

There are many equivalents of Area 51, mainly:

  1. Pokhran Test Ranges. Pokhran TR is secured by more than 5 Indian agencies working independently or in tandem with other agencies. The outer perimeter is secured by special BSF commandos while Indian Army secures the facility. Overall security Is maintained by RAW and MI officers. There is also a COIN team to check any leak of information from within. Various ISI spies have been caught trying to get soil or nail samples of the scientists working there. A CIA agent too was rumored to be caught.
  2. Wheeler's Island. India's missile testing base. India's strategic nuclear missiles and tactical missiles, all are tested here. From Agni 5 to BrahMos, everything takes shape here.
  3. Andaman and Nicobar Islands. Of the 572 islands in AANI, only 34 are open to public. AANI also hosts India's top secret Tried Service command.
  4. Trishul Airbase. Trishul Airbase in Bareilly is the largest underground airbase in Asia. This facility was so secure that it housed the MiG-25 fox bats which were bought under complete secrecy. The acknowledgement of Foxbats happened only on the day they were retired. Imagine an airbase so secure that you don't see which fighter jet flies out of it.

Iceland-Consonants, AND Monsters

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Iceland, we have a few. I'll skip the elves, ghosts, trolls and dwarves for now.

  • Nykur - a water demon that lures you to your death masquerading as a horse
  • Lagarfljótsormurinn - cousin of Loch Ness Monster
  • Yule Cat - it will eat the naughty children at Yule (called Christmas in some places these days)

Kareful Of Kappa

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In Japan, it would be kappa. A human like green creature that lives around river.

The Fictional City

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The city of "Bielefeld" in Germany.

If you look it up on any map, or even on Google, you'll find nothing except a normal looking city.

Except that city does not exist. No one is completely sure why it shows up on almost every map, but it has always been that way. There are some theories, that "Bielefeld" was created by a map maker a few hundred years back to check if anyone copys his maps and after some people did that, Bielefled has become some sort of easter-egg for map designers.

Some guys will argue that they are from Bielefeld, but thats just an old running joke in germany.

A Million Ways To Die

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UK.

Instead of UFOS abductions our folklore has a lot of faerie/fairies abductions. People being tempted and drowned in lakes by Kelpies. People stepping into faerie circles/rings and dancing at a party for a few minutes but when they leave its been hundred years and someone see's them dissolve into dust. Fairies stealing babies and swapping changelings in their place. People destroying a fairy fort and getting cursed, even in modern day link and link some of these stories are still heard, but not so much in the abduction side.

Hasn't been a sighting for years but spring heeled jack is an old one.

There's always sightings of big black cats or hounds England) in the countryside and I've had one of these experiences myself. Saw a black cat in a field when I was a passenger in a car but it didn't look right like for the size and distance it was. Something didn't match up. Either a perspective illusion or it was a big cat.

Lot and lots of haunted places. Every town seems to have a good few ghost stories.

Welsh Atlantis

Secret societies and what they get up to. Freemasons being linked to jack the ripper (if you read they all love jack) or demon summoning if you follow they are based around king Solomon myths. Funnily Illuminati used to be a real but less sinister group and it sounds like most of the fears about them come from their rivalry with the freemasons. Though in most cases these societies and freemasons seem to be glorified gentlemen's drinking clubs and not that sinister nowadays. There's also Aleister Crowley and his former group the Golden Dawn too.

Tee Hee

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In Portugal there's the "Honest Politician". No one has seen any in ages, our parents swear they were a real thing a couple decades ago, but it's been so long since anyone's seen any, that it pretty much became a mythical creature.

The Most Canadian Bigfoot

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Aboriginal Canadian... Also Bigfoot. We call him Sabe and he is a tender manitou (spirit creature) of the forest that teaches us honesty. Arguable you could also include the windigo and our various sea serpents, some of which other people living in Canada also believe in.

Also a local Rez has a story about Monkey-Dog, half monkey and half dog that causes mischief. It's not my Rez so I don't know too much about it. I can only assume a white man brought it over to inconvenience them.

A Hot Place

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Aussie here. I can't think of anything which fits the bill. Aboriginal people have plenty of legends, but nobody thinks they might be true. The Thylacine is believed to be extinct but if it was found in the wild, nobody would be totally surprised.

There is a story I heard of the Black Dac. Basically a DC4 Dakota painted totally black which is seen flying over the outback from time to time. Most of the stories have it passing over a campsite at 50 feet or so.

But I have never met anybody else who knows that story so it doesn't really qualify.

Evil Mountain

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It's not my country, but Russians have Metro 2. It is/was a secret metro system buried deep enough under Moscow to withstand a direct nuclear attack. It was made to help ferry government officials from place to place and act as a nuclear shelter as well. Supposedly it has lines that stretch beyond Moscow so they can flee the city if necessary, but it also has living quarters and offices if they need to stay. Like Area 51, it's existence is confirmed, but there are many legends about what goes on in it, and nobody knows if it is still operational.

They also have Mount Yamantau, which is their closest Area 51 analogue. The mountain itself literally means "Evil Mountain" in the Bashkir language, and the Russians have been constructing some kind of massive facility there. Tens of thousands of workers are housed there but the Russian government has been tight-lipped on what is going on there. They've refused to give the US even a hint of what Mt. Yamantau might be used for, and the speculation is endless.

Tikoloshe

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In South Africa, there is a Zulu folklore about a little dude that basically looks like a dwarf/ water sprite/ gremlin type, and he just causes mischief wherever he goes. A lot of Zulu families until this day still put their beds on bricks because they believe that it's too high up for the gremlin to reach. He's known as the Tikoloshe. Zulu shamans created him back in the day to scare people off if they offended the shaman. Apparently he can do all sorts of things; from stealing to killing. The folklore says that the Tikoloshe mostly targets schoolchildren.

Space Dust

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The Tunguska Meteorite.

The year was 1908, late June. For several days, in several locations in the Northern Hemisphere strange lights were seen in the sky. Mainly in Western Siberia, but also as far as Bristol in England. Then, on June 30th, an enormous ball of flames flew over Siberia. A giant explosion was seen and heard hundreds of kilometers from the crash site, with observatories all over the world detecting a shockwave from it. Glass was shattered within a radius of a few hundred kilometers, and a wave of hot air was reported by several people living far away from each other. Reports closest to the epicenter of the explosion say that the heatwave was so devastating that dry grass bust into flames.

The force of the explosion is estimated to be up to 50 megatons, equal to the power of the Soviet thermonuclear weapon, the Tsar bomb. The explosion was heard from 800 km and the seismic wave was detected all the way in Germany. For almost the entire month after that, lights in the sky kept appearing.

The year was 1927. A meteorite researcher named Leonid Kulik went on an expedition to find the crater from the supposed meteorite. Having gathered several witness reports in 1921, he determined where the epicenter should have been. He never found the crater. Not even after he photographed 250 square km of land from a plane in 1938. To this day, no crater was found, and consensus is, no crater ever existed. The meteorite exploded several kilometers from the ground. Yet, even now, nobody knows for certain what exactly it was.

The strange lights in the sky were actually easy to explain, it was ice from the meteorite. But it wasn't pure ice, and what caused it to explode before hitting ground is unknown. It's still a mystery, and it caused many science fiction writers to incorporate it into their stories. To this day it is used as a source for alien technology in fiction, with a video game Crysis 2 being a good example.

People Break Down What's More Emotionally Painful Than Being Cheated On

Reddit user Darkterrariafort asked: 'What is something more emotionally painful than getting cheated on?'

Content warning: abuse and suicide.

There is a level of devastation caused by being cheated on by a partner, especially if it's someone you trusted and have been with for a long time that people who haven't experienced it can't understand.

I've been lucky in that I've never been cheated on myself, but I've had friends who have gone through it. My college roommate told me it was the worst pain she's ever been in when she found out her boyfriend cheated on her, and she couldn't imagine anything worse.

It was indeed horrible. My confident, strong roommate was crying all the time and wondering why she wasn't good enough to keep her boyfriend's interest, even though that had nothing to with it.

Redditors agree that being cheated on is painful, but also are prepared to share things they think are emotionally more painful.

It all started when Redditor Darkterrariafort asked:

"What is something more emotionally painful than getting cheated on?"

Medical Helplessness

"Watching your most precious person die a painful and scary death and knowing there’s nothing you can do about it. F**k cancer."

– coastalliving40

"This. I watched my husband starve to death from gastroesophageal cancer."

"It was like watching a nightmare repeat of my dad all over again. 😞"

– NedsAtomicDB

Mama Who Bore Me

"Death of your child."

– NBA_Fan_76

"I truly cannot imagine a deeper pain."

– theawkwardmermaid

"Your child being serious injured by your ex, and custody court keeps forcing the kid into contact with their abuser."

"You spend years of your life dealing with court homework where you recount every excruciating detail of your own abuse at the hands of this person, in addition to the crimes against your child."

"It costs you about $100,000 in legal fees, and you still aren't able to protect your child. It keeps going on indefinitely, and perversely, your ex tries to send you to jail because the child runs away from them."

– JadeGrapes

"Being responsible for your childs death directly."

– Kanulie

"My father passed very suddenly and unexpectedly two summers ago. It was the deepest, unimaginable despair that it was almost like a dream. Being walked to the little room at the hospital where they let you know he didn’t make it on the ambulance ride was surreal and up to that point the worst moment in my life."

"One month after he passed, I was in a four wheeler accident with my then three year old. And we were alone as my husband was out of town. I wasn’t being negligent- it was just a terrible, terrible accident. But, in the chaos of being thrown off and being in complete shock, I thought the four wheeler was pinning her down. I was screaming at the top of my lungs and crying and trying everything I could to lift it up. Remaining calm simply wasn’t a possibility when you think you’re killing your own child."

"She wasn’t pinned-and actually didn’t have a scratch on her. EMT checked her out and I went to the hospital because I had ripped the top part of my thigh off trying to lift the ATV."

"The whole thing was eye-opening in the worst way possible. Because, I could never, ever, ever, ever imagine losing my daughter- especially to my own fault. What if she had been hurt or died that day? I would be living in my own constant hell. I didn’t think there could be worst pain that when I lost my dad, but now I know there is. Just the thought alone of losing my daughter brings tears to my eyes."

"Life is really rough sometimes. But it gets better."

– BoredMillennialMommy

Going Down

"Seeing a loved one go on a downward spiral and you can do nothing to stop it."

– New_me_old_self

"Extension of your comment: Seeing a close one(wronged by their protectors) going down the spiral."

"You tried to help them a lot but they dragged you down with them and left you not just empty but drained."

– Sullen_Wretch

So Hard

"Suicide bereavement."

"I lost my best friend in 2022. Found him. Everyday is a struggle to not be in my grief."

"I’d take 100 heartbreaks, 100 nights of going to bed hungry, and 100 punches right to the face just to have him back."

– KatastropheKraut

"It does. I got wasted and said far too much about myself once. One of my friends verbally smacked the f**k out of me, got me to see that people do care about me and that my relationships aren't all just superficial, really just hit my sorry a** over and over again with the idea that I'm deserving of love not because other people get something out of being with me but because I am a human being, and it slowly does get better."

"It stopped me, I was going to kill myself in two months on new year's."

"When I can't live for myself, I live for other people, even when I start doubting other people actually like me, I still don't do it or hurt myself at all, because there's always, no matter what I feel in the moment, a chance that they do truly just care about me."

"If I end myself now then I give so many other people survivor's guilt, I leave all the people I care about wondering for the rest of their lives how it all could've been different if they had just tried a little bit harder to help me. I won't elaborate now but I feel a similar sort of regret when it comes to a number of aspects of my own life. I could never leave someone with something so unfathomably more painful than that."

– pissandsh*tlord

Sounds Awful

"Mental instability. It's cruel because it's your own mind killing you, you can't run or hide and it's long-winded. I couldn't say a single event has been more emotionally stressful than what's happening."

– Country-Road--

"It’s like you’re dead in your twenties but haven’t been buried til you’re 65."

– Gmr33

Tragedy You Never Get Over

"Having your mother pass away in your arms."

– Repulsive_Cricket923

"Something similar happened to me when i was 4. My parents sent me over to get babysat by my grandmother and she sat on a chair and passed as i was sitting on the floor playing with my toys. I only thought she was sleeping at the time, but later learned the truth as i never saw her again."

– Lucidnuts

Just Done

"As far as relationships go, being abandoned by your former partner is pretty damn painful."

– heyitsvonage

"Mine did this to me after 2.5 years and it was f**king devastating, it took years to get over. He acted as though everything was fine, I was his everything, we were actively planning how we would elope after I finished my degree that term, and BOOM NO DO-OVERS YA DONE."

"It was immediately what came to my mind when I saw this post."

– paprikashi

My Work

"When someone steals your research, hands it in first, gets the high distinction, then everything you submit is plagiarizing that a**hat."

– StaunchMeerkat

"This is two steps worse than, "hey can you put my name on your paper too.""

– karmagod13000

Rather Be Cheated On

"When the person stays with you but they secretly still yearn for that other person (even if no cheating occurs)."

– Deleted User

I actually didn't think there was anything worse than being cheated on after watching my friends go through it.

I stand corrected.

Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/

ancient ruins
Andreas Brunn on Unsplash

Mistakes happen, but when the world is watching, those mistakes are magnified.

When those mistakes have a major impact, those minor mistakes become major.

Keep reading...Show less
Person brushing with charcoal toothpaste
Photo by Chris Slupski on Unsplash

When it comes to love, we've all overlooked something in a partner that we normally would not excuse, because that person meant so much to us.

But when the love wanes and the relationship ends, we realize looking back just how bad some of the things we overlooked actually were.

Already cringing, Redditor MustangSallie asked:

"What is the grossest hygiene issue you overlooked in an ex?"

Poor Dental Hygiene

"They said, 'My tooth keeps chipping and growing back.'"

"Dawg, that’s tartar."

- Alternative_Chip_280

What Teeth-Brushing Habit?

"He said, 'I don't like to brush my teeth because it makes my gums bleed,' as in therefore it's not good for him."

- feyceless

"I dated someone who never brushed his teeth because he didn't like the tastes of minty toothpaste, as if other flavors didn't exist."

- Princess_Jade1974

Used Tampons

"How’s this, happened with my high school girlfriend, at 17."

"The bottom drawer of the bathroom was filled to the brim with used tampons, and when I discovered this and asked why the bin or even just a sealable bag wasn’t an appropriate option, she sheepishly said she liked the smell of them."

"I tapped out."

- Metaphysical-Alchemy

Sniffly Nose

"I would frequently hear my ex blowing his nose at night in bed. He always said it was into a t-shirt. I thought that was gross but whatever."

"Then when I moved out, I discovered he was actually blowing it into his hands and wiping it onto the back of the fabric headboard of my bed! His side was covered in so much disgusting crusty snot."

"I left it there. F**k trying to clean that!"

- bilby_mum

Simply... Unclean

"I could smell my ex's a**. I had to bring it up more than once. That was one of many things. I don't know why I put up with that s??t. All I can think of is that I had low self-worth."

- rubberloves

"Oh God, same. My first proper boyfriend had a constant stink of s**t. I thought I was going crazy because how could someone who just showered smell like poo?"

"Anyway, when we broke up, the first thing my sister said was that she was so glad I was no longer dating S**t Man. Cannot believe I dated that."

- rabbitluckj

Nowhere in the Wedding Vows

"Oh hi. This is going to be cathartic."

"My ex had a toenail fungus so bad that his super long and disgusting crust-mobile toe literally cut holes in multiple fitted sheets."

"Our toilet paper rolls would get poop on them. Because ye olde ex somehow got a poopy hand EVERY SINGLE TIME and then transferred a little bit of it to the roll. Was he doing the first pass with a bare hand? I have no idea."

"Once he didn’t change his clothes for a week, then he took a shower AND ALMOST PUT THE SAME UNDERWEAR BACK ON. I had to convince him to put on clean undies."

"Sat on the bed right after a shower, naked. Stood up, and a tire track was on the bed. HE HAD JUST SHOWERED. THIS HAPPENED MULTIPLE TIMES."

"Fuzzy teeth."

"Anyway, we’re divorcing now."

"All of this started after we got married, and then the pandemic basically turned him into a feral animal. I did not consent to marriage with this level of hygiene."

- psnugbottybug

Disgusting to the Family

"Well, not on purpose, but when we broke up, my family told me he smelled horrible. (I have zero sense of smell, so I had no clue)."

- AtomicDreamWeaver

A Reality Check

"I was seeing a guy but he would never invite me over to his bedroom, and one night his friend dragged me to the room and was like, 'LOOK, at THIS. You want THIS? This is nice?! It’s disgusting! He’s hiding THIS! I’m trying to help you!'"

"He was flipping through trash to show me how bad it was. Food containers everywhere, trash all over the floor and I’m pretty sure suspect-looking piss bottles?"

"I ended up dating him for a year, and cleaned/gutted his room several times, but it was just too much."

- Zoinks3324

"I can just imagine how hard it was for that friend to be like, 'I love my buddy, but please do not date him.'"

- Camimo626

Absolutely Unlivable

"They peed the bed. Every night. I would sleep so close to the edge of the bed to avoid it, and my ex always reeked of piss, even after washing the blankets."

- glusmoker69

Poor Cleaning Habits

"He showered maybe twice a week and changed his underpants even less often. In the summer, I could smell his a** crack."

"His job was dishes and he'd leave them for weeks if I didn't end up doing them for him."

"The only thing I really wouldn't do was laundry because we had a creeper downstairs I wasn't comfortable around. So sometimes even I ran out of underwear."

"I left him almost two years ago and he went back to living in squalor. His place is all carpet and he told me recently he vacuumed it once since I left and that was just because the unit was being inspected."

- Pour_Me_Another_

What Shower Habit?

"She showered once a week, sometimes longer, and was very usual for her to go days on end without showering, didn’t change her panties or bras for weeks, either."

- DUKEPLANTER

Worrying For Them

"Refused to floss. She claimed the space between her teeth was too tight, so I introduced her to the Glide series from Oral B; but she still refused. I suggested a water pik since there was no actual flossing involved, and she refused again."

"Some nights her breath was really really bad, to the point where I let her know because I was worried for her health. She took it as an insult and tried to say I was just being a d**k."

"I loved the relationship, but we eventually broke up. The flossing wasn't a factor in this, but it's certainly something that I eventually overlooked."

- bassman2112

Taking Care of Them

"His toothbrush was moldy. I don’t think he ever thoroughly rinsed it off after brushing He still used it, and called me a nag for mentioning it was probably unsanitary."

"So I got him an expensive electric one. It got moldy. So I took on replacing the brush heads for him myself every couple of weeks."

"He wondered why I barely wanted to have sex. Who wants to f**k someone they’re raising?"

- powands

An Unwelcoming Home

"He did not clean his house at all. I mean there was trash everywhere, no clean dishes, no spot was clear on countertops, and his bedroom was so cluttered, there was only a trail clear to the bed."

- wetpeachyangel

So Necessary

"He refused to wear deodorant because it was 'feminine' and 'feels weird.'"

"Mofo, you stink. Wear it."

- GodHatesUsAll

This conversation gave us the creepy crawlies and left us in need of a nice spa treatment.

Everyone could use a healthier dose of self-worth and self-respect, but that seems especially true for these Redditors who actually thought they had to put up with this.

Woman with face to palm
Jussara Paulo/Unsplash

Kids say the cutest things, don't they?

Their unfiltered observations about life's many mysteries can be downright hilarious and serve as reminders of their pure innocence.

But it's less forgivable when adults make naive comments because, well, shouldn't they know better?

That's not always the case, however.

Curious to hear ridiculous examples of the things grown people say, Redditor Automatic_Hedgehog71 asked:

"What is the silliest statement you have ever heard someone make?"

Some people should really think twice before opening their mouth.

Work Of Art

"'How did they get the paint all the way up the sides?' -Middle-aged woman touring the Meteor Crater in AZ."

“'That’s not paint, those are the actual colors of the rock' -Her husband, giving her a long stare and walking away."

– ghostbungalow

For Trial And Error

"I had a boss say 'oh you don’t want kids, you should just have one to try it out.'"

"Really, and what happens if I find out that I truly don’t want kids? Can we just put it back where it came from?"

– tyintegra

Confused Soldier

"I worked at a place that gave a military discount."

"Family (mom, dad, adult son, adult daughter) walked in. Dad was reading the prices and pointed out to the son that he could get a discount!"

"This kid takes the sign, reads it, and says, as God is my witness:"

"I'm not in the military. I'm in the Army."

– JustMeerkats

To Live Or Let Die

"Someone once told me that paramedics/nurses/doctors are not allowed to do CPR on someone they know because it’s 'a conflict of interest.'”

– corviknight2259

It's a wonder how some people manage to live in the real world.

Know Your Audience When Using Big Words

"Sat down to eat with a friend. I said 'I'm famished' she looked at me, laughed and LOUDLY she said to me 'I swear you make up words sometimes.'"

– NotBadSinger514

"Oh man people say this to me all the time! Why did I read books and learn so many words, when no one understands them, and I really didn't think they were so pretentious, words like Famished."

– Person_Letter_629

Not Icarus

"A friend of mine said she got more tanned when riding her bike than she did when walking because on her bike, she was 'closer to the sun.'"

– Five_Star_Amenities

"This just reminded me of a time I was out on a boat with a big group of people and one of them said 'I’m so glad it’s windy, I won’t get sunburned' they thought the wind would push the light away from their skin. I was the only one to say it definitely doesn’t work like that and I could tell they thought I was wrong."

– Thbbbt_Thbbbt

The Symptoms Indicate Otherwise

"Earlier today I offered a cough drop upon my flight’s landing to the lady wet coughing right behind me the whole flight."

'Oh, no thanks, I’m not sick. I just went to Oregon and have felt awful the whole time since.'

"Okay…so…sick"

– ACaparzo

Completely Lost

"A friend once said she couldn't take Southwest Airlines because she was flying east to Florida."

– ProudCatLadyxo

"How do they get the planes back? Do they repaint them as Northeast? Or do they just push them?"

– ch4m3le0n

"They just keep flying south until they come back around."

– frymeyourpoop

A Silly Sports Spectator Said

"I was at a baseball game in Cincinnati and the teenage girl behind turned to her friend and said 'this is so cool, it's almost like we're watching it live.' I think about that a lot."

"EDIT: based on the look of the girls and their other conversations this was no joke, there was no laughing either. Don't remember the exact year but flip phones were the most common cell phone and we had seats in the outfield so she didn't appear to be watching the game thru her phone. This also wasn't the first time that day where I heard them say something and I stopped what I was doing and stared straight into space, just the most memorable. They seemed like nice enough girls, no malicious or rude conversations, it just appeared like they lacked some basic intelligence for some relatively simple concepts."

– Michael_With_An_M

You can't be difficult and clueless at the same time, can you?

Observe exhibits A, B, & C.

Unpalatable Texture

"A woman tried to send back a dish. She didn’t understand the components of it and tried to tell me that she couldn’t eat it because she was allergic to crunchy. Like yeah the texture. Not the ingredient that we had made crunchy."

– BuckleupBirds

"LMAO. Makes me feel better about the guy who asked a friend (server) for ‘Mushroom risotto, but without the rice’."

– Mavises

I'll Have The Pie And Ice Cream With A Side Of Ice Cream

"Had an older family member that back in the day went to a diner and ordered the 'pie a la mode' from the menu. He then proceeded to ask the waitress if they could put a little ice cream on top of that. : )"

– Fluffing_Satan

My husband and I were walking around a gift shop in Solvang, CA, and marveling at some of the various tchotchkes.

One of them was a MOVA globe.

MOVA globes are usually about the size of a softball held up by three small supports, and they rotate without the use of electrical wires or batteries.

Instead, they're powered by the combination of solar cells and torque from the earth's magnetic field. We didn't know this at the time, however.

When a worker nearby saw us being mesmerized by the shelf of spinning globes, he commented, "Cool, right?"

And I replied, "Yeah, how does it work?"

The dude gave a sly smile and said:

"It's an optical delusion."

Or illusion...