Women Divulge What They Find Most Confusing About Men
Taylor Wilcox/Unsplash

Men have this reputation for being simple, straightforward creatures.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Humans in general are not simple, straightforward creatures, but men are just ... baffling.

At least as far as the women of Reddit are concerned.


Reddit user Theunknowndud asked:

"Women, what do you find the most confusing about men?"

These fine femmes saw an opportunity to vent and ask questions and they absolutely ran with it.

Here's what they most wanted to know about.

Not Going To The Doctor

perry cox whatever GIFGiphy

"Why some men don’t go to the doctor or dentist, unless someone else makes the appointment for them."

- macaronsforeveryone

"Because if someone else makes appointment for me I feel obligated to go. But I don't care about myself enough to make the appointment myself and I just learn to live with whatever the problem is."

- cow042

"It's like reading my own mind."

- thehandinyourpants

"I go because I'm told it is medically necessary by my wife. Otherwise I've been conditioned to determine whether it is financially necessary. In other words, if I'm not missing work because of it, it isn't necessary."

"I can't speak for everyone, but that is what I grew up with and I can't just "break" it, so I really do rely on my wife to force the issue, otherwise the cost factor pretty much overrules everything."

- Hickersonia

"I hate making appointments unless absolutely necessary. I don’t feel like going to a doctor is a necessity unless I’m not feeling well (I know I’m an idiot). As far as the dentist goes my wife made the appointment once and ever since then the receptionist makes my next appointment."

- rickfrompg

Mess? Where?

"You can be completely oblivious to any mess in the house but can spot a wall has been brush painted in the wrong direction from 20ft away."

- babygem84

"Wall is permanent mess is temporary"

- stealth941

"I am a man. I don't know anything about painting so don't spot stuff like that but every time I visit someone I spot how they set up their router/WiFi and see why they might have problems with their WiFi connection as they just hide their stuff away instead of putting the box in a way the waves flow unobstructed. I work in IT."

"English is not my first language and I'm kinda tired but hope what I wrote makes sense."

- TheGreatPinkUnicorn

"I learned some guys are like this because they were never raised to clean up after themselves. Their moms or caretakers always did the tidying for them, so they never learned to “see” mess and do anything about it."

"Compare this to something like wall painting which can be something that they spend a lot of time perfecting."

- estate_agent

Breath, I Forgot To Breathe

Breathe Schitts Creek GIF by CBCGiphy

"I'm a man. But something that confused my wife is when I suddenly take a deep breath for no reason. She's like 'are you ok? You sure? Anything you need to talk about? What's going on?' And I just say 'nah I'm fine, think I just forgot to breathe and catching up'."

"To be honest, I feel really blessed that I have someone who cares enough to ask if I'm OK. But yeh, seriously just forgot to breathe 😀"

- Zenith2012

"Dude it's so fukin true that i was taking a deep breath as i was reading ur comment."

- mohaamedwaleedd

"Are you ok? Anything you need to talk about?"

- 1j2o3r4g5e

Can't Remember.

"My wife's biggest gripe is that I will spend time hiking / drinking / driving / whatever with friends I haven't seen in months, and when I get home I will have absolutely nothing to report back despite having talked solidly with them for six hours."

"My wife on the other hand will casually pass a friend in the street and within ten minutes knows what theyve done every day since they last spoke, the health and financial status of them and all other friends and relatives, and a forward facing calendar for the next three months."

- gazhole

"It’s funny though. All the bullsh*t we talk about as guys slowly leaks a bunch of personal information over time. You can tell that one guy isn’t happy with his relationship, one guy is broke, one guy hates his job, one guy has a medical issue. You know all of this without really talking about it just because you spend quality time with them. Yet even we can’t recount it directly, we just know it in the moment when we are with the boys."

- Old-Figure922

"Damn you really hit the nail on the head there."

- User Deleted

Going Into Screensaver Mode

looking homer simpson GIFGiphy

"I’ve learned a lot being married to my husband, but there’s one thing I fail to understand in general. Why do you guys like to stare out the window so often? It’s usually just going up to a window or looking out the front door, and you fall into a trance. What’s up with that?"

- Foops69

"I actually do this a lot."

"Also when I’m in the shower I will just stand and think."

"I’m usually thinking how to solve a problem that will probably never occur."

- [Reddit]

"Lol. I love it. It’s particularly amusing to me when I’ll realize the room has fallen silent and I look up and he’s just there. Staring. My dad did it too."

- Foops69

"It's a way to trick your brain to go idle long enough to enter screensaver."

- anaximander19

"Brain defragmentation"

- undefinite_resonance

Power Saving mode

"My gf is still baffled at the fact that I can just turn off my brain and not think of anything"

- ButtDealer

"There's a science museum where I live and there's a game you can play that uses brain waves. Basically it has a ball in the middle of the table that moves based on who has the least amount of brain activity at the time. And you want the ball to move away from you."

"You put on a head piece and when both players are ready, they touch the two pads on the table with you hands. I'm currently undefeated at a record of 14-0. Idk if I'm dumb or if I just shut everything off but life support lol"

- Vaporwing

"I found my husband on the couch in a dead silent house whistling tunelessly and playing bongos on his own tummy. When I asked what he's thinking about as he's doing that he says 'You know...nothin'. Like listening to the wind in your mind and sh*t. Everyone does it'."

"No Cowboy, we don't all do that. Y'all have some magic happening. Sounds nice."

- CinnamonBurp

One Of The Worlds Mysteries

"D*cks, the way they work is confusing. Like I’ve been told they only react when seeing or feeling something they like but I’ve also been told it will just decide to pop up randomly though the day with nothing."

- Annaclaire_x

"True, d*cks are doing what they want. Sometimes out of nowhere it just decides to stands up. Also, it can stand up when you're aroused (obviously) or when you're excited to see someone you haven't seen in a long time."

- Artass937

"Can confirm, i got a got a penis and im still confused how it works at times."

- Clayman8

"Fun fact: The penis has pressure sensors, just touching it a bit or squeezing a bit can be enough to trigger an erection."

- MigasEnsopado

"Boners are strange. Morning wood is the result of overstimulation from a dream. We get nervous boners. We get sad boners. We get angry boners."

- Burrito_Loyalist

Forgive And Forget

i forgive you hug GIF by Kim's ConvenienceGiphy

"I find it confusing how men are so forgiving. It’s one of the things I adore the most about men and find the most baffling. I’m learning now that men will get over things like 40 minutes after they happen and genuinely get frustrated and sad when their girls hold grudges. I’ve found that the people I’ve had falling outs with and was able to rekindle my friendships with were mostly all men."

"I also find it weird how men will fight each other and then be best friends the next day."

- Full_Nebula_4443

"You get angry in the moment but then after you're removed from the situation you gotta let yourself cool off. Once you're thinking clearly you'll realize it wasn't that big a deal and get over it. Usually the start of a fight isn't that big it's the stuff that comes after that escalates it so you just recognize that both of you just human and do and say dumb things when your blood is up. Also I think women tend to plan more and then act and men will just act and plan on the fly so that leads to women believing slights or f**k ups are more intentional whereas men will just think of them as mistakes and forgive them."

- MadForge52


"Coincidentally, just yesterday I was reminiscing on a friend and me getting into a fight. I hit him over the head with a glass bottle and he gave me a really clean two-piece in response."

"I laughed for a few minutes at how inconsequential that fight was after the fact, but how extreme it was looking back on it. We’re still thick as thieves to this day, lol"

- solitarium

"As a guy I feel we are a bit more black and white about forgiveness. I can easily forgive and forget most low-level things given time but I still have some grudges from over 10 years ago. I will likely never forgive them."

"Basically men work like traffic tickets. Small things are forgiven quickly. Bigger things take time. Some things are permanent."

"Some women feel more like an actual criminal record that never gets expunged."

- narderp

"If someone is kind/self-aware/brave enough to apologize after they screw up, then it becomes easy to accept an apology from someone who understands they did something wrong and wishes that they hadn’t. Everyone makes mistakes, especially men, so forgiving and moving on is much more sensible than holding a grudge"

- uriah12g

I Am Okay

Animated GIFGiphy

"When guys are seriously injured but act like its just a scratch… that they can somehow walk it off. All the guys I know are like this."

- CherryBlossomSunset

"A serious answer is because we don't want to panic and cause an issue"

- Traditional_Bat5572

"This is it right here. As soon as a calm guy starts panicking, everyone is panicking."

- spectra__

"Reminds me of when I accidentally cut a chunk of my finger so deeply that it hung off and you could see white underneath. I was internally freaking out and didn't even want to look at it, but did so I could assess the damage. I calmly asked my partner to bring me some bandages and alcohol and when I turned to look at her, she was pale and her lips were turning blue. She said 'Okay, but I need to sit down for a sec...'."

"I ended up walking all the way to the first aid box on the bottom floor of our apartment building while holding a cup under my finger to catch all the blood. I wasn't gonna try and walk it off, but I absolutely knew I couldn't panic for her and my sake!"

"TLDR: Someone will have to fix it, and panicking makes problems harder to fix."

- Saymynaian

"Exactly. Panicking doesn't help the situation. A clear head and talking to people on how to help solves way more."

- Traditional_Bat5572

They Jiggle Jiggle...

"How their crotch doesn't hurt when they run or go up the stairs. Like, even with underwear, you just have stuff hanging down there. I don't even have a large chest and it hurts to run regardless if I'm wearing a bra or not"

- YourLocalCat-Girl

"I gotta tell you, the penis doesn't weigh much."

"A boob weighs more, and you ladies have two of them."

- ZenEvadoni

"One testicle also hangs lower than the other for the specific purpose of not getting crushed when walking."

- Swreefer1987

"I'm a guy and I didn't know this, lol. Neat."

- NewPokemonFound

"Our stuff is not as heavy as yours, so we don't feel the dangling effect much. Also, sometimes it hurts when we wear very tight/ short undies"

- SKORPIO07

"A couple things: Breasts are considerably larger and heavier than testicles, so they bounce a lot more. I jump up and down a few times when I get out of the shower, so my towel doesn’t have to soak up quite so much water, and I do support my balls while I’m jumping. That was a mistake I made exactly once. But if you’re wearing briefs, and the bouncing isn’t as much, it’s not really an issue."

"You’ve had your breasts since puberty. We’ve had our penis since birth. We had to learn to walk with it. You had a decade to get used to walking a certain way before your build changed dramatically. We’ve had essentially the same hardware our entire lives."

- JesusIsMyZoloft

... at this point I might be more confused than I was going into this article.

We've got mess-blind people, refusal to acknowledge injury as if denial is somehow a healing agent ... and a dude who forgets to breathe.

Help.

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