Financial Experts Break Down The Worst Financial Decisions They've Ever Seen A Client Make
Bottoming out!
The world of finance is a constant gamble. Algorithms change, dows drops, stocks pivot.... it's a never ending game, more intense and bloody than Game of Thrones and a 007 film. That's why its so important to find and listen to the people who become experts in this field. So why do so many of us gamble with our coins based on our own thoughts? Or intuitions? Especially since most of us never got past Algebra II.
Redditor u/weekendbrainsurgeon wanted to hear from those in finance field about bad decisions they've witnessed that we all should never try by asking.... Bankers, Accountants, Financial Professionals, and Insurance Agents of reddit, What's the worst financial decision you've seen a client make?Tilray Down
mickey mouse smh GIF by ABC NetworkGiphyI had a client in her 70s put her whole savings in Tilray stock.
Tilray at the time was trading above 150 per share. I told her it was a terrible idea to put all of her savings in one investment but she told me I was wrong. She argued with me for a good 15 minutes until I relented and said okay, it's your money. So she put 300k into Tilray.
Couple weeks later it starts dropping, I call her and get no answer. It's sitting at 6 dollars a share now, her account is down to about 12k. Last time I spoke with her I took no pleasure in telling her she's no longer my client.
The Truth is Out
Had a client who was extremely wealthy about eight years ago tell us he was no longer going to use our services. Last year we get an extremely angry phone call from his wife asking us why we haven't been filing their taxes. We showed her the paperwork where her husband said he was no longer going to use our services. And then crap hit the fan. This dude apparently just decided he wasn't going to pay taxes anymore and didn't file a return for eight years and had been lying to his wife.
They were rich and owed almost 1.4 million dollars in taxes not including interest and penalties. And oh yeah they got absolutely fried by the IRS. If you are in a relationship with someone you need to be involved in financial decisions. Never let one party handle all of the money and make all of the decisions. That is how bad things happen in both business and in relationships.
Worthless
I had a client Buy numismatic gold coins with an entire retirement account. She bought 266k worth of coins at almost double the price of bullion. I got the gold salesman on the phone and asked him to justify the reasoning and I he said it was because the dollar was paper money and worth nothing and that gold was going to go to 10000 a coin. I asked him what he exchanged this gold for and he said "well she paid me dollars". Then I said "why would you accept a worthless currency for your rapidly appreciating gold currency?" He cursed at me and hung up and said I didn't know what I was talking about.
I still haven't met a gold salesman that can answer this. Their whole pitch is that the dollar isn't worth anything but they happily take them in exchange for gold coins. The whole thing is crap. Poor lady. She can't sell them now even with gold bullion as high as it is for anything close to what she bought them for.
I am a fully registered advisor just to disclose.
600 Down
Tea Smh GIF by moodmanGiphyNot my client.
Saw a guy invest about 600k in a start-up. He confirmed in the 1.5 pages agreement that he was fully informed about everything going on.
Please if you invest in that size, ask a lawyer to at least review the agreement.
Needless to say, said guy's net worth is 600k less now.
The Accountants Know
Accountant here.
If you're a small business owner and your business provides you with even a remotely significant amount of income, then get a separate bank account for your business income and expenses and never, never, never commingle your accounts. If you find that you need to make a business payment and you don't have that money in your business account but you do in your personal, then write it down in your books as money that you give the business that then gets spent on the business expense. Likewise, if you want to use your business income, pay yourself a wage or a 'dividend'. The moment you cross your accounts is the moment that you put yourself into tremendous financial paperwork frustrations.
The Lotto Scam
Former manager at a credit union. One seemingly smart lady in her 70s got one of those lottery scam letters saying she won, but needed to send them money to process her winnings. They kept getting her to send more and more money. We were telling her it was a scam from day 1, but we couldn't stop her.
She burned through her IRA which had about 200k. Took out a loan against her paid off house for another 200k. Sold her jewelry. Probably paid out 500k total before finally realizing.
We truly did everything we could. Got her family involved. Several of us would confront her every time she came in and would plead with her to stop.
It was sad but at some point you have to cut your losses and realize it's a scam.
Edit: I was the assistant manager at that point. We brought our risk management department and other higher ups in but they wouldn't close her account.
The whole 500k was not with us. We had no idea about the loan, jewelry and some money in other accounts that she gave out until after it was all over.
She even thanked us later on and wishes she listened to us.
100% Gone
I've made money with both stocks and options but I get on r/wallstreetbets sometimes to see how tf someone can go tits up so easily and omg.... "I have $50,000 in my account, let me throw 100% of that on Amazon puts that expire Friday." Ive also seen people who pull in $1m in their first year and try to tell everyone else how to trade. That's like me hitting it big on a slot machine and then pretending to be an expert.
Chose HULU
cindy brady smh GIF by HULUGiphyUsing ALL of his "retirement" and daughters college tuition to short Netflix. He lost over a million dollars.
"sovereign citizen"
Best friend is a CPA, and when he had his own practice, he had some pretty big-name clients (Senators, musicians, pro athletes, etc.) One of the biggest mistakes people made were thinking they were smarter than an accountant. His biggest challenge were the people who heard about the "sovereign citizen" nonsense. To no one's surprise, a random guy on YouTube doesn't know more than an actual CPA with 40+ years experience. At least a few of these new-found "sovereign citizens" ended up doing time for tax evasion.
Just Exercise
working out richard simmons GIFGiphyA private company announced a special dividend to all shareholders as of date of record one-month in the future. $1.30/share dividend.
There was an option holder with 300,000 options at a $0.10 strike price.
He did not exercise them. Had he exercised his options for $30,000, he would have been paid $390,000 the following month.
Wordless
Not an accountant but I used to do Social Work that included some budget coaching. I was going over one family's monthly budget and trying to figure out how they were going to rearrange so they could pay the subsidized $10 copay for court ordered counseling that would make or break them keeping custody of their children. Now, budget was a little tight because only the dad worked. But he was making just under double what I made for helping them with the budget. And they were living in a gross trailer park where they paid next to nothing for rent.
And this was a step up from the gross motel room they had been living in before. And when I was nicely chewing them out for missing a counseling session, they were all too happy to explain the problem. Which, of course, was dad got paid on Thursdays (weekly) and the Counselor had them scheduled for Tuesdays (weekly.) So, there was no way they would have the $10 left to pay the Counselor on Tuesday.
The solution to this was they had to start driving across town to pay the Counselor on payday, and then drive to their (already paid for) session 5 days later. I was just getting my mind wrapped around this concept, when the mom called me all excited. She had fixed their financial problems. She refinanced their (POS 12+ year old) car. And she was so excited to tell me that instead of paying $385 a month, their new payments were only $115 a week. I still have no words.
Send in the Cars
I've seen people finance cars at over 30% interest. paying $500/mo for a 8-year old mustang, and will end up paying well over 2x the cars value, assuming they pay the loan off.
Edit: since this kinda blew up, here's a PSA for all the active duty (American) military people - any loan you took out prior to either enlistment or deployment is eligible to have the rate reduced to either 6.99 or 7.99% (google it before you call your bank, as it's been a couple years and laws change.) all you have to do is call your creditor and provide them with your orders and they have to reduce the rate, even retroactively, to the date you deployed (or enlisted.. again, google it).
Idiots.
idiots GIFGiphy- The client who joined an MLM and racked up half a million dollars worth of losses before finally listening to us and quitting.
- The client who spent $40k on Farmville over 3 months.
- The clients who give their adult children allowances that exceed my salary, fancy cars, and houses without expecting them to ever hold down a job themselves. vwh808
The Shoo-In....
Payroll accountant. I used to work for a company with an actuarial Department. There was a lovely young woman working in the call center with a masters degree in data science. She was constantly talking about how frustrated she was with making $16/hour in a call center when she had a masters degree in data science, yet no matter how many times I told her to apply to the actuarial team she wouldn't do so.
The actuarial team was HUGE about promoting within. I saw many people who wanted to learn more about what they do who had no experience whatsoever get excepted into the team because they wanted to learn. This girl was a shoo-in. And yet she never even tried despite the fact that there were always openings. She also shared with me that she was $180k in debt for that master's degree. Last time I checked in with her she had left the job completely and is now in school for art. (Insert facepalm emoji here.)
But my favorite was before I was even an accountant. I worked for a small CPA firm as a receptionist during tax time. I saw a full-grown woman sit down on the floor and start crying because she owed $900 in taxes that year when she had made about $150k that year. I rolled my eyes so hard that I hurt myself. Later that day I had a guy who owed $750k to the IRS and said "woohoo! That's way less than last year!"
The Lost Seat
Watched a client walk out of my office after I explained the risk in liquidating his 401K to start his own business. He started it with no management experience or business model, real "fly by the seat of his pants" kinda guy. Wanted to start a career flipping houses in a college town, turn them into upscale rentals. Did it in a bad neighborhood and lost EVERYTHING.
The Background
I'm a CPA and had a client whose business was going under. He started taking out payday loans on his own salary to pay his staff. When it gets this bad with no end in sight, time to reduce staff.
Also in r/accounting someone posted about wanting to file bankruptcy over $900 in credit card debt. This person was about to graduate college with an accounting degree and would have been making $50k starting out.
We all thought he was trolling us, but somehow ended up coming off as a legitimate situation. Who wants to hire a bankrupt accountant which shows up in background searches?!?!
Simple....
Feeling Dumb Jim Carrey GIFGiphyProbably not the worst, but one of the more perplexingly common...
Making over $250k (sometimes WELL over), no withholding, not paying estimated taxes throughout the year, can't afford the tax bill with the return EVERY YEAR, then complaining because they can't afford the installment payments on the taxes they owe from two years ago.
Moron, sell your gaudy, gross McMansion, take your teenage daughter's credit card away, let your drunk driving son stay in jail and get a public defender, and tell your horrible wife to stop spending all day at the tennis courts sipping mimosas. Get your mess together and pay taxes throughout the year like the rest of us. You aren't being persecuted by the IRS, you're just an idiot.
Don't Spend It!
I work for a bank. One of our branches had a customer who was basically homeless. Then, he wins the lottery! Over the next few months, the staff watched him come in to withdraw thousands of dollars every day to spend on extravagances. Everyone tried to convince him to sit with a financial advisor to help him make the most of his money. Less than a year later, he's in slightly better shape than when he started; he's at least able to live in the car he bought.
Countless Screw-ups....
What I've seen, countless times, is someone who started a business with ZERO research, no understanding of what running a business involves. (Here's a hint: practically every business involves paperwork and deadlines.). The business models come in waves... for awhile it was Barbecue shacks, then it was cupcakes, then house flippers, then food trucks. I think they see it being done on TV shows that make it look fun. It isn't fun when they come to me with debt, tax levies and lawsuits.
IRS and state labor department and health department on their backs, and suppliers taking them to court for unpaid bills. Some of them cashed out their retirement account to buy a business; others put their house up as collateral for an SBA loan. it's a nightmare. If they had come to an accountant first, we might be able to help them (or even better, dissuade then). I usually see them after 18-24 months of screw-ups and by then it's usually too late to rescue them.
ATM Issues
make it rain loop GIF by Chris TimmonsGiphyBanker. Banks charge fees for using other bank's ATMs.
I had a customer that would check his balance and then do withdrawals daily at a foreign ATM. Guy did not have a lot of money to begin with and because he did this, would overdraw his account and get slapped with an overdraft fee which put him in the hole further. We ended up taking away his ability to overdraw his account. Dude was pissed, but it helped right the ship a little.
Things That Make People Immediately Say 'No' To Eating At A Restaurant
Reddit user TREE__FR0G asked: 'What’s an immediate ‘no’ that makes you not want to eat at a restaurant?'
Hungry customers could think of plenty of reasons to try out a new restaurant.
It could be good word of mouth found on Yelp reviews, a personal recommendation, or just plain curiosity in the spirit of adventure.
And while diners can be influenced and easily persuaded to walk into an eatery they haven't tried before, customers are not without the certain criteria they're entitled to.
Curious to hear from strangers who may have reservations about making a reservation, Redditor TREE__FR0G asked:
"What’s an immediate ‘no’ that makes you not want to eat at a restaurant?"
The smell from inside a restaurant should draw potential customers in, not repulse them.
Unpleasant Odor
"The smell. General cleanliness but most importantly, is the bathroom clean?"
– ibetyouranerd
"Years ago I walked into a local restaurant and the smell killed my appetite. It reeked of cigarette smoke and mold. The restaurant was sold and the new owner abolished smoking and throughly cleaned the place. He said the hood in the kitchen had so much grease and crud it that it looked it had never been cleaned. Now, the place is spotless and is a great place to eat at."
– phred_666
An Establishment's Short Lifespan
"Yeah there was a new restaurant that opened about 10 years ago, the smell the moment you walked into the door was raw sewage, they said it’s a plumbing issue, we lost our appetite and left. That place closed in a month."
– Omegaprimus
Exterminators Have Good Scents
"Exterminators know a certain smell that’s an immediate no-go. Roaches in abundance give off a sweet type of smell and I will literally turn right around and leave."
– otterplus
Dirty tables are an instant customer-deterrent.
Sour Rags
"Ugh, yeah and when they wipe down your table (with some dirty old snot rag that's probably never been cleaned, it even rinsed out) and the smell fills your nose after the murky brown drops pool on the table where you are now expected to eat."
"That's after the waiter smears around the jelly from the previous customer and pushes all the table crumbs onto your lap."
"Pro tip: you are supposed to cup your hand as you wipe so the crumbs accumulate in the palm of your hand. You start on one straight edge and wipe from one corner along the edge to the other. Then you turn your cupped hand, ready to begin the next pass and so you kind of catch the crumbs."
"No one likes someone else's crumbs brushed onto their lap!!"
– Th3_Last_FartBender
Unsanitary Cleaning Supplies
"Sticky tables. Tells me they reuse their dirty wash rags and don’t change out the sanitizer water they use in the buckets and nothing is clean or sanitized in there. Oh and spots on cups and utensils."
– Known-Pop-8355
For some, ambiance is everything.
Conversation Drowner
"Loud sh**ty music."
– porpoisebay
"A small band or single person on a keyboard crammed onto a makeshift 'stage area' with a poorly balanced slightly sh**ty sound system so that you can neither hear nor enjoy hanging out with the person you’re a foot and a half away from."
– PillsburyDohMeeple
No Audio Control
"You ever been in a car where the musics too loud and you can’t hear what the person next to you is saying? Imagine that but you can’t turn it down."
– Northern_boah
Off-Key Performer
"We went to a family style seafood restaurant about a month ago on vacation. It had been a large fish-camp style eatery for years, at least since the 80s, with lots of tables with holes in them for the oyster and clam shells from roasts. Big with retirees and young families."
"The restaurant is shaped like a large rectangle. They had taken the middle of the back wall and turned it into a stage- where, that night, a man was playing a guitar and singing, 4 octaves off and the speakers cranked to 11. It was 6 pm. We asked how much longer he would be playing. 2 hours."
"We left."
"Old on top, new on bottom. https://ibb.co/LnXXd3r"
– GetYerThumOutMeArse
These observations are very telling.
Desperate Cry For Help
"A sign complaining about how short-staffed they are because 'no one wants to work.'"
"I'm out."
– TheVoicesOfBrian
"I stopped patronizing a small local tavern for this reason. I liked going for a few cold ones and lunch on the weekends. Owner was a royal douche. Food quality went downhill. And then he'd complain online about no help. I'm like dude, I wouldn't work for you either."
– mistlet0ad
Disgruntled Staff
"If most or all of the employees are visibly unhappy. I don't want to do business with a place that doesn't respect their employees or our community."
– deathByAlgebra
Absent Pricing
"Prices not on menu... and refusing to answer when asked what they are."
"This happened to me a couple of months ago."
– cheesewiz_man
“'Market price' equals 'you pay what we tell you to pay. Cause I don’t see anyone else selling fish at this restaurant.'”
– bigno53
I have a sensitive sense of smell, so all it takes for me to nope my way out of patronizing an establishment is a foul odor.
The source could come from mold or reused mop water or who knows what.
I don't care how good the food is. If businesses can't keep a properly clean restaurant, who's to say they don't have a sanitized kitchen as well.
Any couple who comes to a mutual understanding that there is no future and/or chemistry in their relationship should consider themselves lucky.
After all, when one half of a couple surprises the other with their desire to break up, it's never a pretty scene
Largely owing to the fact that the one being dumped often wants a reason "why."
While some people use that age-old, eternally unsatisfying excuse "it's not you, it's me", others can be a little more specific.
Lack of chemistry, not enough in common, wanting different things, lives going in different directions.
In some cases, the reason people decide to end their relationships might be a little more specific, and incredibly strange to boot.
"What's the weirdest reason you've broken up with someone?"
Shiver Me Timbers!
"In the early 2010ish era I was in college and went out for Halloween."
"And met a guy dressed as a pirate that looked like Johnny Depp dressed as a pirate, it was the era of those movies."
"We started dating and I realized he looked like a pirate 24/7/365 and I couldn’t handle it."- toreadorable
Bird Watching Isn't For Everyone...
"We saw an owl while driving in a road and I thought it was so cool to see it fly over us and land in a nearby tree."
"She thought I was crazy."
"I mean…it’s an owl."
"How can it not be cool?"- SlytherinWario
No One Likes A Cheater
"She thought she got the answer to the crossword, when it was actually me."- IsolatedPSup
Compromise Is Key
"Never wanted to get tacos."- Mcshiggs
Loud And Clear
"He talked so fast that I often couldn’t understand him."
"When I would ask him to please talk slower, he would talk LOUDER."
"But just as fast."- SouthSideSurvivor
Season 2 Fairfax GIF by Amazon Prime VideoGiphyAt Least Pancakes Are Round...
"We had an argument about the way the world works.'
"I thought it worked as a globe he thought it worked as a pancake."- Minix22·
Not Cool
"She threw garbage out my truck window while driving down the road."
"First date-last date."- paintman01
Pee-Ew!
"His feet smelled."
"I mean so bad."
"They were so bad one night I thought he sh*t the bed."
"Wasn't going to go the long haul with that."- hunnyjo
Disgusted Full House GIF by absurdnoiseGiphyElle Ne Comprend Pas...
"She would speak French to herself in the mirror at home, and then she would do it at restaurants thinking it made her sound sexy, I guess?"
'I don’t know."
'Here’s the thing."
"She knew not one word of French."
"She had no desire to learn a single word of French."
"She just spoke gibberish that sounded VAGUELY like French."
"She was a full grown woman in her late 20s."
"College degree and a job."
"She started doing it around the second month into our relationship."
"That sh*t embarrassed the hell out of me."
"I know a few words and even offered to teach her - foreign student taught me how to say, 'I love a lobster' and other weird sh*t that we both thought was hilarious while getting baked."
'She said she didn’t want to learn."
'She just wanted to act like she was speaking French."- LookMaNoPride
french yes GIFGiphyDog Gone It...
"Her dog was teaching my dog to howl at sirens."- Wake95
Some Might Find This an "Eeeeexcellent" trait...
"He had posture & hands like Mr. Burns from 'The Simpsons'."- Natural-Ad2924
Moving Too Fast...
"She added me to her family's group chat after a week of dating."
"I was about 16 at that time and felt much pressure."- SirLaw___
Im Watching You GIFGiphyIf a relationship has no future, there's no point in staying in it.
And sometimes, you don't even need to dig for an excuse as to why things need to come to an end.
Or, as the French would say: "Escargots, Brie, Formidable"...
(Sacré Bleu!)
There are thousands of interesting conversations happening every day behind closed doors, but some of those doors may not be as firmly closed as people would hope. These Redditors share their stories of when they heard something that was absolutely not meant for them, whether they wanted to hear it or not.
1. Rant Like Nobody’s Listening
I just got back home from spring break and I left the gate open to our driveway because my mom told me that my sister and her wife were coming to pick something up. I was sitting in the office room immediately to the left of the front door. My sister barged in angry that I had left the gate open and starting ranting to her wife.
“He is such a sorry loser that he can’t even close a gate. He is just going to stay in this tiny town and do nothing with his life! He is just going to be some dumpy middle school coach like the rest of them.” I grew up in a small Texas town that had a huge poverty problem. She said some other things to her wife while I just sat silently and didn’t move at all.
After about a minute or two, I made a loud enough noise that I know my sister heard and she gasped. She left immediately and we never spoke about it again; we barely even spoke at all after that.
2. A Dazzling Lack Of Logical Thinking
My aunt and her husband offered out of the blue to buy a house and sell it to my parents at a very low rate. My family was very excited and gracious for the help as we had been stuck in our very old and tiny house for a long time and unable to move due to the financial burden my parents had to endure because my brother and I had various medical issues.
In the following months, our grandmother paid for our family plus my aunt's to go on vacation and I was excited to take my boyfriend of five years with us. When we got there my aunt asked if I could watch her 8- and 9-year-old stepsons while she and her husband went out to see the area. Now normally it would have been fine.
But I watch kids at my job all day and it was a family vacation with lots of other adults to watch them, I said no because my boyfriend would have had to entertain himself or be roped into babysitting with me. She smiled and said, "Sure no problem." And I thought that was the end of it. I was so wrong. Several weeks after the vacation I overheard my mom on the phone.
She was talking to my grandma in a furious voice about how my aunt decided to not help us with the house because I decided to not watch HER stepchildren on vacation and that we should be more gracious to them because they were being so generous. Needless to say, we no longer speak to that aunt and my parents never blamed me for my choice.
3. Money Can’t Buy Happiness
I work nights right next to a bar. The conversation that's stuck with me the most was when someone's baby mama found them and started a one-sided shouting match outside the window. She said something along the lines of, "You've got a million dollars in your bank account and still can't take care of your kids." Saw her running and screaming at him as he got in his car and drove off.
4. Food Fight
I've overheard a lot of great stuff while riding the bus. One time I get on and there are only two other riders. They're in the back cussing at each other loudly. Both these dudes were big guys and dressed like total punks with the leather, spikes, and grungy jeans. Obviously, me being a wussy kid I'm not sitting anywhere near these two giants.
These guys seem like they're about to start swinging at each other. But a few moments in, I can start to hear what they're discussing. "Yeah! And then I put some homemade whipped cream on that thing! Mmmmmmm!" They were yelling about desserts!
5. There’s A Lot Going On
Senior year of high school, I popped into the bathroom during lunch. While in the stall, three girls come in talking loudly about who even cares what. Then one of them asks, "So how is pregnancy treating you?" A different girl answers with absolutely no change in her cheery attitude, "Oh, we lost the baby. We're gonna try again when he gets out of prison."
First girl at least sounds a little sad when she adds, "That sucks, but I totally get why you're doing this. If your mom won't let you be together..." Finish up my business and walk out of the stall to see two freshmen and a sophomore who should be a junior...
6. A Quick A Wit As Ever
I was in a thrift store a few days ago, and there were these two older men in there, talking very loudly. One picked something up and kind of yelped and the other guy goes, “You must’ve looked in a mirror.” Old people roasting each other is some of the funniest stuff ever.
7. You’re Wrong If You Do, You’re Wrong If You Don’t
I speak French and when I was about 18, I was walking on the sidewalk near an outdoor pool. A bunch of teens about my age were walking on the sidewalk towards me, all in bikinis. Not wanting to be rude I passed them without checking them out or anything. Then as I passed and kept walking, I heard one say in French, “He didn’t even look at me!”
Then the others consoled her and confirmed that she was hot enough to be checked out. They went so far as to say that I was being a jerk and maybe I didn’t think her beauty should be acknowledged. I was just flabbergasted.
8. What Happens In Vegas… Makes Others Sad
One time when I was in Las Vegas, I woke up and overheard my dad begging my mom to let him buy a working girl. I could hear the pain and hurt in my mother’s voice. I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.
9. A Multilingual City
I was eating in a restaurant in Amsterdam and was speaking English with the waiter. There were two women sitting next to my table speaking in German about basically everyone that came into the restaurant. I knew that the waiter spoke German so after about 30 mins of the German women's nonsense, I spoke in my best German to the waiter.
I told him that I found it wonderful that there are so many languages spoken in Holland and that everyone here is always so kind. These two women turned to look at me with the same beet-red faces. Priceless!
10. Lose The Man, Keep The Mess
When my first marriage ended, I had depression and struggled with motivation to do anything really. My house wasn't dirty, but it was untidy. I went away overnight for work and my parents were feeding my cats, I had a cat cam set up and I logged on while my parents were there and heard my dad saying, “I don't blame him for leaving her, look at the state of this place.”
My husband was terrible and cheated on me constantly for our whole 10-year relationship, but it was me leaving a couple of shoeboxes around that tipped him over the edge…
11. Good Thing She’s Got Harry
This lady sitting behind me was just tearing her dude apart while on the phone with a friend. The two lines I remember were, "He's fine, but he's got no ambition," and "I don't even let him touch me. I've got Harry for that. God, if he didn't make good money, I'd leave him."
12. That’s A Lot To Keep Hidden
I accidentally overheard my parents discussing whether to tell me and my four siblings that my dad had three children from a relationship he started at 16 over 40 years ago. My parents told us all together the next day. They only told us because the eldest of the three was sick and needed help.
13. We All Make Choices In Life, Some Are Better Than Others
When I was a teen, I overheard two women chatting at the supermarket. One told the other that she and her husband recently installed a surveillance camera in their 14-year-old daughter’s room and that the time would soon come where she would have to confess to her daughter. And do you want to know the worst part? She spoke about the confession like she didn’t do anything wrong and it was an inconvenience.
14. I Hope They Have Insurance
I was about 15 and waiting to be seen by my eye doctor. I think I got there early and was in the waiting room. There was no one else in there. However, I heard two doctors behind the wall talking about some patient and whether to offer a surgery. Essentially, they said the patient didn't need the surgery but they could make a decent sum of money, so they should encourage the patient to go through with it.
15. 3 Minute Wonder
The guy above my old apartment was a single dude. We barely spoke, but that's basically the one thing I knew about him. He'd occasionally have a new girl over, and I could hear him boinkin' whatever girl he brought over. I'm not trying to talk smack about the guy with this, but he and whatever chick would go at it maybe three minutes tops.
One night, he had a new girl over. I could hear mainly her, but after maybe thirty seconds—sudden silence, followed by this chick bursting into laughter. I heard her leave maybe five minutes afterward.
16. There Is A Right And A Wrong Way To Do Things
I wasn't exactly eavesdropping, because she knew I was there. Honestly, that makes it even more messed up: One night when I was about 11, I was doing my homework at the dinner table while my mother was on the phone with her best friend, and she just casually dropped the news that she was divorcing my dad. We had a cordless phone too.
It's not like she couldn't have left the room to have that conversation somewhere her fairly young, completely unsuspecting child wouldn't hear it?
17. You Get What You Pay For
I had just secured a place for my family to live with an old college friend and their family. My partner and I helped a lot around the house trying to make it sanitary and did the dishes on the regular. It became obvious we were just picking up after them at this point and they were not helping one bit. My friend mentioned to their mother-in-law that they felt bad.
She thought it was wrong that we were constantly picking up after them, to which she replied, "Well they are guests here, they should be pulling their weight, they're freeloaders if not." My friend agreed. Mind you, we were paying rent and allowing them to buy food off of our stamps since things were tight for everyone.
We stopped cleaning up after them, and told them we needed the money for our own food. The house was trashed in less than a week.
18. Maybe Walk Down The Street Next Time
My ex thought I was sleeping. She went out on the back patio which was under my master bedroom window that was open. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, but overheard her talking to her friend about how they were both seducing an old man for money and pills.
19. Rules To Live By
At a 21st birthday party, a friend and I were having a smoke break. We heard two people leaving the party and talking in quite a distressed manner. One guy says to the other, “Mate, no matter how you’ve had to drink, never try and kiss your mate's mum.” I don’t think I’ve ever laughed harder.
20. Not Something To Brag About
I was on a bus once and I heard two guys sitting on the seat next to me. I was dozing off, but just woke up to hear one of the most messed up things I have ever heard. So, this guy was just telling the other guy how his mother and his brother used his father's retirement money to build a house and kicked him out later mercilessly.
He was smiling the whole time. He even showed the other guy a video in which his father was being interviewed by a local news channel to request people donate some money. I don't know how bad his father was to them, but that seemed pretty cruel.
21. Best Laid Plans
My mom and I overheard her sister-in-law planning to get the mafia to take out her husband for insurance money when they were drinking in a bar. She sobered up immediately and went and told my dad about it. He got his brother to change his insurance after some convincing. The wife left him when he told her he got his insurance changed.
Apparently, she's had several families in her past that she'd left. They were going to run him off a cliff on his motorcycle ride home from work he took every night.
22. The Realities Of Farm Life
This story is told from my point of view, witnessing a stranger eavesdrop on my mom's phone conversation. We have a family farm with animals who do what animals do and make more animals. My mom and I were at a Kinko's when she received a call from our groundskeeper. Her end of the call definitely sounded a bit wild.
My mom said, "Hey, what's up? She finally had her baby? Great how's it look? …Didn't make it huh, are you sure? …That's too bad. Ok, I guess just put the body in a garbage bag and toss it in the dumpster." I'm watching this poor random customer listening in on the conversation. The growing horror on her face as the conversation went on was hilarious.
It culminated in her dropping her shopping items and hustling out of the store just as my mom hangs up the phone. I thought it was the funniest thing ever. Mom, not so much.
23. Not A Great Start To The Day
One day I'm in the office handing something in from my teacher. A school bus had never turned up to take these kids to school so they all had to get rides. I'm talking 25 kids chilling in the office getting marked late. Each kid that walks in is getting told off by these nasty rude receptionists about being irresponsible and not getting on their bus.
All the kids pretty much take the scolding. After they all leave, the receptionists laugh and say, "Oops, apparently there was no bus. Oh well it will keep them on their toes," and thought it was the funniest thing ever.
24. A Unique Turn Of Phrase
Sitting in our favorite Mexican restaurant when my friends and I hear a college-aged woman complaining to her cohorts about how awful her boyfriend was. He gave her a ring, but it's not a promise ring, nor an engagement ring! How dare he?! "It's emotional waterboarding! It's totally emotional waterboarding!" She kept going on and on.
But always came back to his actions being "emotional waterboarding! Emotional waterboarding!" It struck us as completely ridiculous and hilarious, and we've been overusing that particular phrasing ever since.
25. And They Never Spoke Again
I heard my sister hooking up at a party. I wasn’t eavesdropping on purpose, I heard it by accident. I was at a big high school house party and I was with my buddies. I walked away for a minute and on that walk, I heard noises coming from a bathroom, I listened for a second because I didn’t know what noises they were.
But I then realized they were moaning and...other stuff. I quickly walked back to my friends and said nothing until I looked over and saw my sister leaving that bathroom. I never told anyone I know and will take it to my grave. One of my worst memories.
26. Be Careful What You Wish For
At an airport, I hear a husband and wife arguing. Long story short she is angry because he had been begging her for years to have relations with another woman. And she finally did. She really enjoyed it and can’t believe he is upset. His side of the story. He then said, “Yes it has been a huge fantasy of mine, but I didn’t expect you to sleep with my sister at a family reunion after I passed out. Now my entire family knows.”
The best part was that they were at the airport traveling with the sister and other family members. He continued, “Now I have to sit over here with you, and on the plane with them for the next three hours knowing that they all know you slept with my sister.”
27. Say Cheese!
In my last apartment, I walked into my bedroom late at night, and saw a small but very bright red light in the ceiling directly over my bed, I instinctively said out loud, "What the heck is that?" The lady upstairs gasped and a male voice asked, “What's wrong?” She answers with, "OMG, it's my fiber optic cable for my camera into his room. I forgot to cover it up!!"
I thought it over, and rather than going through a long legal fight and a lawsuit, and certain criminal charges for the lady who lived above me, I put into motion a full-bore push to find a new, more secure place to live.
28. As Useless As A Million Dollars
Not really eavesdropping but reading a text. During the summer, I would babysit for my sister while her husband plays video games all day…and I mean All. Day. Nonstop. One day, I was trying to deal with the kids and they were too much for me (mind you, they’re three kids under the age of 5) so I left the kids with him and stepped out of the room to go have a frustration cry.
A few hours later, when he went to work and my sister got back from work, I was doing something on my phone and my sister was next to me texting him. The kids were all in bed by this time so it was relatively calm. I glanced at my sister’s phone and I what saw made me want to scream: It was a message from him saying that I was completely useless (in terms of babysitting).
This man sits on his behind all day while a teenager basically steps up and takes care of his kids. But apparently, I’m the useless one? Makes sense, right?
29. Rough Day
It wasn't intentional eavesdropping. I was in a conference room at work reviewing some scripts for a video coming up. And we start hearing some crying and talking in the next conference room. Apparently, they were letting someone go because she kept showing up to work intoxicated and they had warned her before.
30. All In The Family
I accidentally found out that a friend of mine got his aunt pregnant. I heard him ask someone over the phone, "Are you sure? I mean, Mom is going to be upset if she finds out. No, no, no, I'll go with you. For real, we can't see each other again? Wait, no, we can just go away...together, you know. No this it's not wrong. I love you. Please don't." When I asked about it, he told me the truth.
31. Not The Worst Thing To Overhear
I worked in a call center as one of the people who monitors calls for quality. I saw my boyfriend at the time was making a call so I tapped into the call. He was calling his dad to tell him he was going to propose to me in Cancun the following month. I felt like garbage that I heard it. Almost 22 years later I’ve never told him.
32. An Image Is Worth A Thousand Words
Not exactly eavesdropping, but I was walking behind a well-dressed man in an airport, he had a single rose in his right hand. Hair gelled, nice blazer. I was behind him thinking it looked like a nice gesture for a romantic partner. Then, without missing a step or turning his head, he raised his arm and dropped the rose into the trash as he passed a bin.
It occurred to me that I was exiting the airport and he was too. I have always wondered what happened.
33. To Each Their Own
As a teenager, my parents and I stopped for dinner on our way to our family cottage in northern Michigan. We overheard two elderly women at the table next to us discussing the life events of their grandchildren. One says to the other in a proud manner, "Well, Alice is doing great for herself, she found her life's calling with the carnival. She gets to travel and see the country."
I wish I could've taken a picture of my parents' faces in that moment; they were trying so hard not to break composure.
34. But It’s Part Of The United States
When out at dinner, two people, I'm guessing in their early twenties, were talking to each other about taking a trip to Hawaii. One said it was expensive to fly there. The other suggested they just drive a car. They seriously both thought this was a good idea. My mother was trying not to laugh to loudly but when she looked at my face, she lost her composure.
35. Don’t Judge Without Context
One time, a lady was listening in on me. My best friend and I both bought lab puppies from the same breeder. I got a black lab and she got a yellow lab. Well, I’m telling friends about our new puppies while waiting for a table at a crowded restaurant. I say, “Yes we adopted sisters! They have the same father but different mothers.”
“The father was black and my little girl took after her dad, she is so black, literally her lips, nose everything is black. My best friend’s little girl is so light she’s almost white. I guess she took after the mother.” Then I see the look of horror from a random woman listening to my conversation. Of course, from that point on I laid it on thick never once mentioning “dog” or “puppy,” only “adopted girls.”
36. What Were They Doing At College?
I once went to a nearby university campus to do some work, I work remotely most days so I can do it from anywhere. Two college girls seated right behind me in the student center were comparing old photos. I don't want to talk negatively about these two girls but they were not studying engineering or medicine at the school if you know what I mean. I was treated to the most bonkers conversation I think I have ever heard.
I think about these two dumdums all the time and it makes me laugh. These are some of the things I heard them say: "That thing is big, is that a donkey (it was a dog)?" and, "What were you even doing in that outfit, was your mom trying to make you a pizza guy?"
37. Use Your Powers For Good
At a music festival, I overheard (and saw) a few people just ripping apart their car looking for their keys, throwing things all over, and getting in a big fight amongst themselves. We went to our car to take a quick nap. I mention to my friend, “I bet these idiots don’t know they left the keys in the glove box or something.”
We wake up a few hours later, go see some music, go back to our spot and THEY ARE STILL LOOKING. Upon us walking up we hear, “Oh my god, they were in the glove box this whole entire time.” …I guess I should have said something?
38. Poor Ron
I applied for a promotion where I worked. It was between me and another guy. My experience was stronger and I'd been there longer. On the other side of my wall cubicle, two people from HR were talking and one said, "So I guess Ron didn't get the job.” And the other said, "Yeah, don't know why he even applied, didn't have a chance, what a joke.” I am Ron.
39. The Circle Of Life
I was pregnant and my water broke so I went and sat on the toilet while my husband made phone calls and did responsible about-to-be-a-new-parent things. While basically being stuck on the toilet gushing amniotic fluid, I can hear our neighbor, who we shared a wall with, turn on their shower. I then hear not one but two voices.
They proceeded to have very loud relations while I was sitting there not even three feet from them, separated by what must have been the thinnest wall, while I was in the beginning stages of labor. I literally can’t wait to tell my son this story one day.
40. What Is It?
So, we (me and my now husband) were leaving a youth hostel and there was this guy at the counter talking to the receptionist who was carefully explaining that there is a reason why they take a credit card number upon booking. At which point the guy loudly says, "But it’s everywhere! All over the bed, side table everywhere. Just give me some cleaning products and I'll clean it up.”
At this the receptionist replies, “Sorry but the mattress will have to be replaced, using the card details.” I didn’t stick around to find out whatever it was and I’m very okay with never knowing.
41. Not A Great First Experience
I was at a restaurant, and there was a group of four women. One of them was talking about how bi-curious she was and was trying to convince the other women to go to a hotel with her to experiment and how their boyfriends don't need to know. The other three were clearly uncomfortable and trying to laugh it off, but the one trying to convince them was really pushing it.
I don't know how close that group was before, but I have a feeling she made it weird!
42. That’s A Terrible Plan
A 72-year-old man was fired for not being able to produce the required 10 units per day. Later in the day, I hear the production manager who fired him laughing while telling another employee, “HR wanted me to have a plan to help him improve. There was no plan.” The replacement has been on the job for seven months and struggles to produce even a third of what the 72-year-old man did.
43. Next Time, Try A Pinata
I got invited to the same birthday party by the same girl every year for several years. I only knew a few people but everybody was nice to me. One year, I even met a girl who was super into me, which never happens. That should have been a red flag, but I was popular enough to think that sooner or later I’d be able to land a pretty girl. I spoke to her that night, but she didn’t answer when I called to set up a date later.
I shrugged it off, these things happen. The following year, I overheard the party host and some friends talking around the corner, “We’re going to tell Paul (Me) that you like him, then you’re going to pretend to like him all night but then never speak to him again. He thinks we’re his friend. It will be so, so funny.”
I did not reciprocate when the pretty girl hit on me, saying I had a girlfriend. Her retort was, “Who would date a loser like you?” It turns out this was a game they played every year.
44. One Benefit Of A Large Family
I was standing in an elevator with a couple of other people at a hotel in San Francisco when a guy gets on talking on the phone. As the elevator starts moving, he says, "God, Donna's family breeds like rabbits, so there should be somebody that's a match for his blood type." He looks around him, realizes that people are either struggling to keep a straight face or outright laughing.
His face goes red and he gets off at the next floor. I wrote his statement down as soon as I got the chance and still have the note in my phone.
45. Believe What I Say, Not How I Say It
I teach English in Japan, and the majority of my students had no idea that I knew Japanese. A girl came up to me and asked in Japanese, "Sensei, can you speak Japanese?" And I replied in Japanese, "No.” She then skipped back to two of her friends and said, "See? He can't speak Japanese!" And one of her friends said, "Then how did he answer your question?"
46. Ignorance Is Bliss
While wiping tables at Starbucks, I heard a guy propose to this very attractive woman. The moment was so tense that even I was sweating then after a few seconds of hems and haws, the girl replied, "I love you so much, but I can’t." The guy then asked, "And why is that?" I think everyone listening that day flinched the moment he asked.
The next few words that would come out of the woman's mouth not only scarred the man but also made me hate this woman who I just saw for the first time. She said, "I've been seeing Dave behind your back."
47. So Many Questions
I was a cashier in a gift shop at the time, and these two old women came in, they were reading inspirational quotes off a wall near my cash register. One said, “Oh! I love that, that reminds me of Harold.” The other replied, “Oh! it does, doesn’t it? Things just haven’t been the same since that awful lawnmower accident.”
48. A Life’s Story, Heard Through The Grapevine
My neighbor is a wicked successful realtor and the nicest lady in the neighborhood. She always gave us popsicles, let us play with her dog, hosted movie nights in her yard. But she got in with the wrong crowd. And as bad choices do, it took her life from lavish to destitute real quick. Though she kept it pretty under wraps, pretty soon I couldn't help but notice something disturbing: Her two-year-old son was no longer around.
One day, mind you this is like a Tuesday on a school night, she comes to our door looking rough, hair a mess, holding her dog Charlie by the collar. I hadn’t seen her up close in a long time since her issues started, as she no longer gave us popsicles or hosted parties. I didn’t even recognize her. She immediately asked for my dad, which was weird, but I ran and got him.
He took her to our patio out back to calm her down, and we were watching Charlie. Me, being 14 and nosy, snuck to my room which overlooked the patio and quietly slid my window open. She was telling my dad how they were “partying” and her boyfriend took too much, passed out, and then woke up not knowing where he was and who she was.
The boyfriend had snapped and struck her. My dad walked her back home and proceeded to talk to the guy. My brother and I snuck down through the bushes as we were worried he would hurt our dad after hearing what she just described. Back in the day, my dad partied, so he knew how to talk this guy down. We could hear him saying, “Hey man, let’s all calm down.”
“This is Tracy, you know her. She’s your girl. You’ve been partying, it’s all good. There’s more inside.” The guy had a tiki torch as a weapon, and clearly there was no getting through to him. He looked at my dad, dead-eyed, pupils black as night, and said, “I’m going to eat you.” We saw my dad back away with Tracy to run back to our house.
We sprinted back through the street to get before him. Turns out the boyfriend was also her dealer and the one who got her hooked. A couple months later SWAT was at our door, asking permission to enter the backyard so they’d have a clear shot of her back door. I heard the SWAT guy say “ready to execute” once he had his shot. Thankfully they busted the guy without lethal force.
49. Was Jesus In Mean Girls?
A woman’s adult son was talking to his mom while walking around Target. His mom said something about not being a fan of Jesus (the biblical one). Her son said, “Why don’t you like him? Did he write something mean in your yearbook?” And I have never laughed so hard at a random one-liner in my entire life.
50. Always Be Nice To The Staff
I managed a theater for years and we had all types of rich entitled jerks come in. So, one night this guy comes in with a super-hot lady on his arm. Buys popcorn, a drink, and pays with a $100 because he is rude. And they go inside to get a seat. About 10 minutes later he comes running out and his phone is ringing.
He answers the phone and goes, "Hello? Oh, hey sweetie. Yeah, I'm stuck at the office late with some meetings. Kiss the kids goodnight and I'll see you when I get home.” One of my employees has the great idea to scream, "SIR YOUR LADY FRIEND FORGOT HER POPCORN!" Right as he is getting off the phone.
A lot has been written about birth order among siblings and how it affects personality.
Not that everyone agrees on the effects.
Some say the oldest is the family rebel, while others say they're the ultimate conformist and rule follower.
Others assign those roles to the middle child.
But pretty much everyone agrees the youngest child is spoiled.
So does that mean an only child takes all those dynamics to form their personality?
The folks of Reddit sure has some thoughts on the matter.
Reddit user imlovegina asked:
"What is a dead giveaway that someone is an only child?"
Trust
"I told my boyfriend to close his eyes and open his mouth (I was surprising him with candy) and he just did it with no suspicion at all."
"People with siblings can’t trust like that."
- cowsofoblivion
Limited Pop Culture
"I’m an only child. One huge difference I see time and time again with those who have siblings—they had much more exposure to a longer timespan of media/music/games growing up. My idea of nostalgia consists of my specific timeline of media growing up, but those with siblings were able to watch tv shows their older brother watched, or knows about that game their little sister played."
- DopeYeti
"Yeah, the media you get is what your parents get for you. So PS2 was my only console since I requested one for my birthday and that's really it. Bigger families might have older siblings have older consoles, media, movies etc."
- Top_Lengthy
No "I'm Going to the Bathroom"
"I heard once only children are less likely to announce where they are going when they leave a room. Right away I realised I do that, but my partner who grew up with 2 sisters tells me where he’s about to go when he moves, even if it’s to the bathroom."
- NucularOrchid
"Now that im in my 30s I’ve trained myself to say where I’m going when I leave a room but it STILL feels so awkward when I do it."
"I also distinctly remember being confused in my first few relationships when people told me they were going to the restroom (okay?) and irritated when I would get up to go and they’d ask me where I’m going (like, we’re in a 1 b/r apartment and I’m not walking out the door, there are only so many options.)"
Anger is Fleeting
"My bf is an only child and it was his confusion at how I can be mad at my sister (who is also my roommate) one minute and turn around and get ice cream or go see a movie together."
He grew up with a bunch of cousins around his age, but it was the quick turnaround of 'I’m so mad at you' to 'I wanna hang out, let’s do something.'"
- sister-christian69
"Hypothesis: I think we don’t have practice of dealing with conflict. I had an argument with someone a few years back and I fully expected it to be awkward between us when we saw each other the next day, but she (not an only child) started chatting with me like everything was fine. I was taken aback and thought this would have lasted for much longer."
- RaspberryTurtle987
My Food is Mine
"My husband HATES sharing food! He is also very good at keeping himself entertained and busy- this was very evident during Covid when I was soooo bored and lost because all my previous hobbies and pastimes were outside the home and/or social activities, however, he just kept going and picked up so many new little hobbies that were independent"
- badjmsbe
"I have a brother and I hate sharing food as well. Some people say that having siblings can teach you to share things but, if anything, having a brother made me extra selfish."
- reforged-demon-blade
"I don’t hate sharing food…but I order food for me + me later fully expecting what I ordered to be there and my gf usually takes some. Drives me insane lol, and she knows if f**ks with my ADHD bc I will stare at the fridge thinking wait, when did I eat that?! Her after wondering what Im looking for: Sorry babe, I ate it."
- huhteeee
Siblings ≠ Friends
"Thinking friendship is like having siblings. It's not. I would never smash a toy on my friend's head and expect them to speak to me after."
- Useful_Jello2910
"I wouldn’t have teamed up with my best friends against their parents or refused to listen to their parents… but me and my sister? Like a two-man army in us vs. our parents battle"
- aw-f*ck
"Yep. Whenever my siblings and I would unionize, we were unstoppable."
- KitchenSwillForPigs
Not Expecting Snack Theft
"From personal experience, food habits. Like buying snacks to store at home and fully expecting them to not have been touched when you’re gone, or eating slower at the dinner table because you’re not fighting over the good food."
"As a teen, on the rare occasion my dad would steal a snack I got for myself I’d freak out, whereas my friends with siblings just resigned themselves to the fate of snacks inevitably disappearing. My mom eats super fast at meals, and she attributes it largely to growing up with siblings."
- HornedTwiddle
"I think this is why I get so peeved when my 14 year old eats all of something I specifically bought because I wanted it. I’ll share with him, but he’s a garbage disposal and will pound an entire bag/box/pack of something in no time, and I get so annoyed. My husband thinks I’m ridiculous but I never had to share or worry about someone else eating my things growing up haha"
- pizzainertia
Doesn't Automatically Shield Face
"No tales of sibling violence"
- ButterEmails54
"Doesn't flinch when someone makes a fist quickly"
- islandsimian
"Yesssss my boyfriend doesn't understand (not that he makes fist at me!!! Just that I flinch a lot.). Also don't throw things at me expecting me to catch it - my instinct is to shield my face."
- Bacon_Bitz
"Oh my god yes. Youngest child here, I also have twelve older cousins, and the amount of things I got thrown at me when I was too little to catch them."
- Dependent_Shower_584
Good At Self Entertaining
"Pretty good at keeping ourselves entertained or doing things alone/being independent."
- stefeezy
"And I find that most of us need alone time. I can be pretty sociable but it can get overwhelming quick. I need alone time every day or my stress levels rise to a point where I can't handle it. Even in a relationship, if we spend all day home, I must be able to do my thing while he does his thing. This has caused me issues in the past, as if I didn't care to be around my partner."
- thinksotoo
"Yup, this is one of the main ones. We are not lonely either, we enjoy our solitude (at least I do)"
- AlwaysSunnyDragRace
Better With Adults
"I can't tell for adults, but when it's one of my kids' friends, the kid who ends up trying to hang out with the adults and gets overwhelmed by being in a group of kids has been an only child 100% of the time in my experience."
- ifnotmewh0
"Yes! I teach middle school, and I can usually spot the only kids by seeing which students gravitate towards chatting with me rather than their peers during downtime. They seem more comfortable and confident just hanging out with the older person in the room."
- catsandcabsav
"I was one of these kids. I knew the adults didn't want me around. I had to choose between two uncomfortable situations, and I could handle being in the way more than the chaos with the other kids."
- needhelpweverything
Less Lonely
"From my own experience, not being as prone to loneliness. The only time I really feel lonely is when I'm around people I'd rather not be with."
- DeathSpiral321
"You can very quickly detect when you don’t fit in or are a third wheel too. Kind of sucks but it means you don’t waste your time with people either."
- Grimvold
"Exactly. My GF and I are only children. We both need a few nights a week on our own which is why we don’t live together. Even when we’re together we can sit quietly doing our own thing for considerable periods of time until we have something important to discuss."
- bjb13
Make Their Own Decisions
"I am an only child… I’ve noticed I tend to make a lot of life choices on my own and don’t seek out a lot of advice or ask for help when I could definitely use it. In fact, I’ve been pretty deep in tough situations when I finally have the realization that there are people and resources I can utilize. It’s not so much I’m worried about asking for help, more like it doesn’t even register in my brain that there is help outside of myself."
- Jaded_Syrup2454
"The inherent guilt of troubling people and asking for help."
- Lycan_Trophy
"I feel called out lol. Only child and this is such a common complaint I receive from my friends and partners, them saying I should ask for help for often. My logic is, well I have to learn it alone anyway. Their logic is, you don't have to right now."
"It's not something I can just turn off ... but I'm working on it. Some times. When I feel safe being vulnerable lol"
- MoodyBootyBoots
Choose Relationships Carefully
"They are very deliberate in their chosen relationships, e.g. friendships, partners, and are usually extremely independent, at least in my experience."
- ffffffffck
"As an only child I have to agree with the deliberation in my relationships."
"I've never used the term "friend" lightly like many people seem to. I see people all the time call others friends when they don't know much about the person and are just friendLY with them. I don't consider someone a friend until we've grown closer and I feel I can genuinely trust them and we can go to each other for help"
- Skeletor118
Quiet Roommates
"They’re very quiet roommates in my experience. Sometimes don’t even know when they’re home. I hypothesize that they’re just used to quiet spaces and might feel uncomfortable when their surroundings get loud or chaotic. People with siblings are used to other people clanging around and making noise."
- IcyConsideration4714
"Yeah I'm an only child of a single mom and spend enormous amounts of time home alone as a child. Can confirm, I'm extremely quiet."
- Yak-F*cker-5000
Unique Parent Relationships
"Really unique relationships with parents. They usually have a very rigid idea and perception their parents. For example, I have to call my mom every day or else she’ll worry, or my dad is always right about _____. I guess when you have siblings there’s more diversity in how you perceive your parents and their actions. But with only children they seem to lack that holistic perspective."
- ninaw11
"My ex was was exactly like the first example! She'd call her mom every morning and would talk a lot every day. It was pretty wholesome to me."
- RaimiKu
"This specifically. I live in a different continent than my parents and we talk every single day. They still ask for my opinion on every decision we take as a family and that has been my family dynamics as long as I can remember."
What trends have you noticed among the only-children you know?