Family of Stand-Up Comics Reveal What It's Like To Be The Butt Of A Joke
The direct, in-your-face nature of stand-up comedy is one of its most notable features, however, there are times when people get offended by the surprise of being the subject of a joke. It's all well-intentioned, of course, but for some, that's doesn't make up for momentary jabs.
Submissions have been edits for clarity, context, and profanity.
Sometimes asking for permission is better than asking for forgiveness.
I do some stand-up but it's not my main focus. When my wife does something I think would make for a good bit I immediately ask her if I can use it for a joke. If she says no, I'll typically let it go. If I think it's really good, I'll prep the joke and run it by her again a few days later to see if actually hearing the joke will change her mind. If she's still uncomfortable, I don't use it.
Hey, if you can't laugh at yourself, where's the fun in life?
My husband is a comic. He always asks me before turning a bit about me or our kids into part of his act. I assume he may say things while he's working out material at open mics, but we always talk about it before he uses it during a "real" show. Overall, it doesn't affect our relationship much. If anything, we are able to be more open and honest with each other about our quirks and habits that are annoying. It also helps that we are both capable of laughing things off and are not easily offended. The bits he has that involve me are all in good fun and are embellished for a better punchline. We both know the truth about our lives!
Cons: it can be uncomfortable when I'm at a show and everyone stares at me, and I'm asked personal questions. People tend to assume that his jokes are the truth, but really they are a version of it.
Pros: A few years ago Chappelle was in town on my birthday. My husband (then boyfriend) opened for him, and he had the entire auditorium full of people wish me happy birthday and I got to hang out in the green room with all of the comics afterward. It was cool.
Seems like a totally normal relationship.
My ex is a stand-up comedian, and I would attend everyone one of those open mic nights in support. All his fans knew who I was, so when he made a joke about his sex life, they all knew it was about me.
I turned bright red, but it wasn't anything other than a tad embarrassing.
I guess it helps that it was a funny joke.
Why not go to have a good time in addition to showing up to be supportive?
My SO is a DJ. Not exactly the same but still the whole performance thing. I've been to all his shows. Some have sucked. I'm not going to be entertained though. I'm going because I love and support him.
No one wants to be a research subject on a date. Unless they're being paid.
I went on a date with a guy who was a stand-up comic (no-one notable) and the way he asked questions about my past relationships made it sound like he was digging for material. I should have invoiced him.
Talk about having arbitrary "lines in the sand..."
I'm a comic and a large part of my act is based on things I've experienced in my relationships, with women or my dad. I have about 15 minutes just about how my dad is an abusive criminal that made my childhood a living hell. We don't talk much but he called me one day to say he saw a video of one of my sets and he thought the bits about him were really funny, that was a surreal moment.
I've written material about most of my serious romantic relationships including my wife (now ex-wife), and only one woman has ever gotten mad at me and it was the strangest thing. I wrote a joke about a very personal aspect of our sex life and it alludes to her being dumb. Obviously, the first time I did it in front of her I thought that would lead to her being upset but SHE LOVED THAT JOKE. She used to ask me to do it anytime she would come to a show. A few months later I riffed a throwaway joke about how she replies to simple questions with Snapchat pictures of her dog, I get off stage, she tells me she doesn't think the joke is funny and is going home alone. The next day she Snapchats me a picture of her doing a peace sign and I never hear from her again. It taught me you can never tell what is going to offend or upset someone.
This is what having a brother is all about.
My brother is a stand-up comedian, he isn't a big name (yet), but as far as I know, he hasn't made a joke about me. He often asks me for advice for jokes or editing when he tweets jokes. He makes plenty of jokes about my parents, but they think it's funny.
However, if I am at one of his shows, he'll tell the other comics that I'm there and encourage them to heckle me, which is always entertaining.
Getting a random weighted blanket in the mail might not fix that anxiety right away...
My sister does stand up. She has a bit about the time I gave her a weighted blanket for Christmas a month early. I had just heard about them--they're designed as a coping tool for anxiety. She was having a tough time, so I was seized by the belief that she needed a weighted blanket ASAP.
So basically, she got this random package and was like "WTF is a weighted blanket and why am I receiving one in the mail???"
She didn't ask permission about the bit but did warn me ahead of time. I watched her perform it and it was well received. I was mildly embarrassed, perhaps, but mostly thought it was funny. As far as sister material she could use for comedy, it's pretty harmless. She does have sets that make other family members come off comically badly, and I just sound like an eccentric gift-giver. So I think I've gotten off easy so far and am very proud to have a badass comedian sister.
And yes, she has warmed up to the blanket!
At least give a shout out to your source of material...
A friend of mine once told me he used my exact jokes or just told stories about me when he was doing stand up. I don't think I have the ability to get the delivery right as I'm usually a horrific mess when speaking in front of anyone, so I don't mind too much. Don't hang out with that guy anymore for various unrelated reasons but I'm sure if he still does stand up he's probably still using my jokes.
Yelling at your kid after a show isn't a good way of showing you're not trashy...
I'm a drag queen / stand up comic. I do jokes about growing up white trash and realizing it later in life. My mom has no problem with me being gay or a queen (any longer), but after one show she came up to me and yelled at me that we were not W/T!!! ??? :/ We were... and still definitively are.
Being immortalized in jokes? Worth it.
I have been dating a stand-up comedian for about 4 years now. He does ask permission and is considerate of my feelings (especially when he bends the truth more than a little). I wouldn't really say our relationship has been impacted by it. He was already doing stand up long before we got together so I knew a bit more what I was getting into. The few jokes that do feature me I consider to be a small nugget of immortality.
"My dad, everyone... I told you so."
My dad is an unpredictable homeless looking mentally ill alcoholic so it was always gonna be dicey having him ever see a gig. He did once and I did a joke that mentioned him -not a bad one but he stormed the stage and was doing like bows and stuff. Ugh. I was mortified but tried to make it part of the show.
Supportive? Check. Not getting offended by jokes at her own expense? She's a keeper.
So, I was a standup comic for 8 years. Dated one woman who hated when I told jokes involving her, even though 99% of the time they were completely fictional and I just needed a subject for the joke (it's much funnier if it happened to me than to someone else). She had zero ability to laugh at herself but was more than happy to laugh at other people. She wasn't a good person.
My wife started dating me while I was already doing standup. The first time she heard a joke about her I think she was a little shocked, but she thought it was funny so she didn't care, and she liked the fact I was a comic and figured it would come with the territory. I never had to "get permission" on any jokes, though I told her that if she came to a show and there was one about her that made her uncomfortable to let me know and I would pull it (unless it was a DAMN good joke, then she'd have to live with it). She never took me up on that offer though.
There's a reason I married her. :-)
A situation that will never not be funny.
One of my buddies from college is constantly doing stand-up to try to either make it big in that realm or get a writing job somewhere.
One of his best bits involves this time where I shat my pants during class, and anyone that knows me would be able to piece two and two together and figure out it's about me.
If he ends up making it big I might ask him to at least change up the details a bit, but it's a funny story so if it helps him reach his goals, I'm all for it.
I'd be honored if this happened tbqfh...
The husband of a friend is a professional comedian. They had me over for dinner one night with a couple of other friends who are comedy writers. The next night I found out that they had me over for dinner because the writers were basing a character off of me and wanted to meet me in person. I've never asked for any details. I have no idea what my friend's husband had been telling them about me. I never asked if it was for a show they were currently working on or one in development. She told me it was nothing bad, they just thought I was interesting. Not sure I want to know how a comedian sees my life. This was years ago, we've never talked about it. I used to be mentioned in a bit her husband did about his wife's friend's, but it wasn't really about me.
Of course, keeping the wife happy has it's advantages too.
Oh man am I late to this, but what the hell. I'm a comic and married. It's pretty rare that I discuss my wife in my act, but on the rare occasions I do, she's always the hero and I'm the idiot. Just like in real life.
Of course, if you can't come up with original material, maybe comedy isn't for you?
My brother had this notebook he carries all the time. Every time we all get together, he listens and laughs at jokes then pulls it out and writes in his notebook asking people to help him develop the joke further.
He basically no longer live in the moment and turns every joke into an assignment. Can someone be less funny when they become a comedian? Yes, they can.
It's important to keep in mind that stories in comedy acts are greatly embellished.
My boyfriend used to do stand up. Some of the material about me was true or partly true and some of it was completely made up or about a different person and he would just say "my girlfriend" for brevity/relatability. I didn't care at all, for the most part, people understand it's not all true.
Religion may be "low-hanging fruit" but there's certainly no shortage of material.
My brother is a stand-up comedian. I grew very up religious and he... chose a different path.
In his act, he says terrible things about our mother, makes claims about the religion and his role in it that are false and basically takes everything I hold dear and stomps on it in order to get laughs out of people.
He's funnier than that. He's smarter than that. He doesn't have to try for the lowest denominator but he often does.
No permission was ever asked nor even contemplated. Sometimes he will tell me not to attend a show if he knows the material he will use that night would ruffle my feathers. So he at least tries.
Our relationship has been strained for a long time. He's long since mocked me and all I hold dear in public and private so I've gotten desensitized to it.
I do wish him success.
In closing, though, asking forgiveness is probably the way to go.
Stand up comic here.
I never ask for permission. I just tell what I think is funny, and if it works. It works. I might have a time where I'm with family and I go, "Oh, by the way, that one thing you did/said is in my act now."
They're mostly cool with it because they know it's in good fun.
There's something seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being a kid and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street. As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go.
After Redditor pnrddt asked the online community, "What small action immediately makes you dislike a stranger?" people shared their observations.
"Playing music..."
<p>Playing music or having a 'private' conversation via speaker phone in a public place.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginci58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LLCoolBrap</a></p>"When they exhibit..."
<p><strong></strong>When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">iotangle42</a></p>"When I'm talking..."
<p>When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gincjto?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">eat-the-rich-07</a></p>"Because one of these days..."
<p>A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginpr97?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">starlightradio</a></p>"It just screams..."
<p>Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">3FoolsinaTrenchcoat</a></p>"When I hear that..."
<p>Grown ups using "baby talk" to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour.</p><p>"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."</p><p>When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know.</p><p>Pet peeve.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginbwb4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">handsahwill</a></p>"Okay, we get it..."
<p>One-upping people. "Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I..." Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginhrkd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">well-uh-yeah</a></p>"When out driving..."
<p><strong></strong><strong></strong>When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FuzzMcBeefy84</a></p>"If you don't..."
<p>Talking negatively about anyone who's just trying to have a good time in a fun setting. If you don't have nice to say shut the hell up.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio4vf5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">intergLACTIC</a></p>"When people..."
<p>When people put other people down to try and make themselves look better. "Oh I'm just playing around with them we're friends." I don't care quit being an @ss you know what you're doing and you should be able to tell you're making them feel bad.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio9p3c?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">inf303</a></p>"If it's into a drain..."
<p>Spitting on the pavement.</p><p>If it's into a drain, that's fair enough, sometimes you get phlegm and you need to get rid of it. Going for a drain shows you're at least considerate of other, imo. But on the floor where anyone can step in it (or if you're in a wheelchair, get it all over your hands from pushing the wheels) is just gross.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginojq3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ghostmadlittlemiss</a></p>When you're in the market for a slew of very specific facts that all fall under the same general theme, the internet really delivers.
Forget streamlined public health capabilities and revolutionized human communication, the true beauty of the internet is all the random, barely useful information you can find when a bunch odd people decide to assemble and swap info.
Homemade TarantulaÂ
<p>"Dental student here. Black hairy tongue is a common condition and it's exactly what it sounds like." </p><p>"It's just caused by buildup of dead skin that becomes hair like because of tobacco use or antibiotic use. Usually combined with lack of frictional forces from brushing"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu9tdq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Alarm-Potential</a></p>Load Em UpÂ
<p>"When a patient gets a kidney transplant, they usually leave the old 2 behind unless there's a significant problem with them."</p><p>"The extra kidney is just tucked in the peritoneum leaving the patient with 3 kidneys."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu6qjd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">MedicalJargon-itis</a></p>Come On Mutations!
<p>"Every single melanocyte on your skin (you know, the ones that give your hairs color, and your skin its skin color) is connected to your sympathetic nervous system via modified synapses."</p><p>"No-one knows why they're connected that way - but we do know that under stress, those nerves nuke the pool of stem cells that create hair pigment, which is why it makes you go grey."</p><p>"A few mutations and you could theoretically be able to control them and change color like a chameleon."</p><p>"So in many ways, we're basically walking cuttlefish."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuyo29?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PavlovaPalava</a></p>Play the Long Game, PeopleÂ
<p>"Humans can outpace any animal on the planet."</p><p>"No, we're not the fastest, but if we were chasing the fastest animal (cheetah) we would catch it and be able to keep going."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisujdr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Bout3Fidy</a></p>Little Helpful CrittersÂ
<p>"There are little microscopic organisms living in your eyebrows, eating away at the dead skin."</p><p>"Don't freak out, they are very helpful and completely harmless, just a little gross"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giud33u?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Vid-Me-BossCheesburg</a></p>Thankfully That Filter is a Pretty Good OneÂ
<p>"Saliva is filtered blood. Your tears are too. And if you're too stressed out you can cry blood."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitshe5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mylifeisathrowaway10</a></p>Imagine It All in a BottleÂ
<p>"I know that the average human churns out between 1 and 2 liters of saliva every day.... oh and we have parasites who are embedded in our hair follicles, and they eat away at our skin, thus causing Dandruff :,)"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisrxcc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Throwawayyy123451</a></p>So HotÂ
<p>"Humans give off so much body heat that in 30 min we can boil a gallon of water" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Financial-Ad-6050</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Rookie numbers" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuvqqt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nopenothappening</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Pshh I can get a gallon of water boiling in like 10 minutes tops" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuhji3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ridiculouslygay</a></p>Oh DearÂ
<p>"Old ladies often have prolapse of their pelvic organs. This means their vaginal walls got so weak that it can no longer support their bladder or uterus."</p><p> -Nurse practitioner"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitopxb?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">vespertinas</a></p>Working in a doctor's office means helping people when they're at their lowest. Sometimes, that leads to wonderful moments when the patient is thankful for all the advice and care you provided. Other times, it means taking something out of someone's bum.
Turns out, that second one happens a lot more than you might think.
For Fashion And Protection
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMwOC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MjkwNTU2OX0.6D-LIQ26JXH0-7OtPpG93HOtt41wAv62bGHMVvuAYpk/img.gif?width=980" id="7ff06" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6109fb5baf04f17deade8b58695881d1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />wound up season 3 GIFGiphy<p>I had a patient come in with lacerations to her fingers. Her blender got clogged and she stuck her hand inside to clear it. She cleared it and the blender resumed....um blending. Luckily, she had long acrylic nails. This helped lessen the impact.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitz5l4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Bornagainchola</a></p>I'd Rather Go To Sleep
<p>Guy came in after being concerned the bed sheet had stuck to his lower leg. Turns out hed been using a petrol mower the evening before and it had exploded. Full thickness burn to his calf. No pain. He wanted to go home to feed his cows instead of being transferred to burns and plastics. Man it looked like white leather.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitkqf9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">DamaskRoses</a></p>Why Play Typical Catch?
<p>Guy was camping with his frat buddies and they were firing air rifles at each other with a baseball glove on.</p><p>The pellet was lodged well into his hand. Like, how did you think this was going to end?</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitq7lt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Milesofstyle</a></p>Close Eyes Off From The World
<p>I was in the ER as a patient next to a guy who was brought in via ambulance because he super glued his eye lids shut.</p><p>He was high as a kite, but so was I from the pain meds I'd been given for my own injury. Whatever meds I was given made me think everything was hilarious. I got yelled at by the nurses for laughing hysterically in the next room. He was being a pain in the a--, ER was on diversion already, and they were not amused.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/githxnc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">brubarbal</a></p>That's Why It's Called A "Dog" Toy
<p>A few stand out. Person somehow swallowed a spiked dog toy.</p><p>Someone tried to reverse his circumcision by cutting more of his d-ck off with a pair of scissors.</p><p>About every object known to man up the bum. 🎵 if you like it then you shoulda put a string on it." 🎵</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitnt24?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">bsn2fnp1</a></p>Yeah, But, How?
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMxMi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjAyNTM0OX0.Esaobyl7Yq7QltSxli0ZwjggE7j8A4gu0uNRnn1ZwUc/img.gif?width=980" id="95a28" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f4eb7f0131c0d79db2de93fd2bbdc0af" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>I've seen an internal vaginal laceration from someone climbing a fence while trying to see something happening down the street.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss2id?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">midturbinate</a></p>Again With The Butt...
<p>ER Nurse here</p><p>-We had a girl come in and who knows what she was doing but she had one of the thin glow sticks in her bladder, maybe some fun finger/glow play during a concert? I don't know but pretty wild.</p><ul><li>Also I had a Spanish speaking only gentleman explain why a shoe polish bottle was in his bum, we had to use a video interpreter due to the language barrier but it's was pretty wild to hear the interpreter say "I have a bottle of polish in my anus" after expecting him to just explain why he had belly pain. We also proceeded to print out multiple pictures of common types of shoe polish he used to ask him if it was "this one or that one". It was hilarious when he identified what one it was based on the picture, he had to go to the OR</li></ul><div><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">AirFryersRule</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a></div>Sounds Like A College Guy Thing To Do
<p>Had a university student who ignited a firework in his anus while drunk for the amusement of his buddies. It exploded, causing full thickness burns of his rectum, resulting in him needing a colostomy</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss6l1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">ArcofRiolan</a></p>Wow...
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4OC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMDMyMzMyMn0.b42VhIpJrAsaFR19Cf55ZVkWnby5yTIrMhI73HVAImk/img.gif?width=980" id="3ccdf" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="50847094a4e17c16febbb35d2146f14f" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />scared homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>Operating theatre - this woman came in with a frozen chicken stuck inside her lady parts. Apparently she had a habit of buying them, inserting them and then pulling them out, as she really had a thing for going through childbirth, but on this occasion, she hadn't allowed time for it to defrost properly /adequately.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Mike_OxonFaier/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Mike_OxonFaier</a></p><p><em>Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter <a href="https://mailchi.mp/knowable/knowable-newsletter-in-content" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">here</a>. </em></p>I love movies. The cinema has long been a savior of mine and has given me some of my greatest inspirations. But being an avid film watcher has also made me quite the critic. I can always tell when a movie is worth the money to see in theaters or wait until it's on basic cable with commercials. The signs of mediocrity abound, and sometimes they aren't that difficult to spot.
Redditor u/fjv08kl wanted to know what is obvious about mediocre cinema by asking.... What are some subtle 'red flags' that tell you a movie is not worth watching?