Major purchases like cars, houses, that bomb $250 pair of Japanese denim jeans that hug your curves and make your thighs feel thick - but not bad thick - good thick, like powerful sexy M'baku thighs. Like you could take the stage as Lady Legasus - them kinda jeans. Yeah, that stuff is all an investment.
We know they're going to last a long time, be there for us, and as long as we're good to them, they are usually well worth the cost. So why don't more people have them?
In the words of the philosopher Todrick Hall, "That sh*t's expensive."
Let's imagine things don't totally suck right now. You have money to invest and you're ready to get the most bang for your buck. So what should you get?
For that we turn to the experts, Reddit:
There are so many things on this list that we never would have thought of. Never really considered myself the kind of girl that needed a backhoe in her life... but I'm clearly wrong about that.
An Old Truck
23 years ago, I bought a used 1991 Toyota 4-cylinder truck. Paid it off early. Its now 29 years old, and refuses to die. Good gas mileage, low insurance. I change the oil myself...
Hell yeah!!! I had an 85 pickup growing up (22R engine), owned a 95 Tacoma for like 10 years and sold it with almost 260k. Then a couple years ago I picked up a 2001 Tacoma with 240k miles on it for $4k. Put a couple grand into it for maintenance and it became my daily driver while the nicer vehicle sits at home. 255k on it now, and I kinda want to put a turbo on it. Freakin' love those trucks.
New windows on our house. Replaced the old single pane metal framed windows. It was like a waterfall of cold air coming off of them and the noise from the street was obnoxious. Heating bill was cut in half.
When I moved back to my home town over a year ago I bought a 27' sailboat to live on because rent here is outrageous. Boat cost $4,500 to buy, and moorage at a decent marina is about $170/month. Rent for a studio apartment or 1br here is $900-$1300; every month I save between $600 and $1100, so the boat paid for itself in 4-9 months.
Lose, Lose, Lose, Lose
Quality cold weather gear.
Not only does it work better and look better, I've had a couple jackets for over 5 years now that see heavy use. Meanwhile I have a couple friends that basically buy and throwaway cheap gear every season. Works like sh!t, looks like sh!t, ends up in a landfill, costs more in the long run. Lose, lose, lose, lose.
Buy A Better Bike
I bought a 500.00 bicycle to use as my main transportation. 500 doesn't sound like a lot but when you're only making 8 an hour, it took some time to save up for it. With public transportation being 2.50 a ride the bike paid for itself in about 3 months. I used that bike for about 3 years. I still have it but i moved so i can't use it for the same purposes.
"I bought a bike..."
I bought a bike that was probably almost $500 after tax. Not really even that expensive for a bike, but pricey when you're making minimum wage. Such a smooth ride compared to the $100 bikes I bought and destroyed from big-box stores. Plus my bike shop will do a quick tune-up every season for free. A good bike is life-changing.
"Not even an expensive one..."
I have a bike. Not even an expensive one, just a regular bike that I use to go to work every day. It's an half hour ride. I no longer use public transportation or a car so I save money on gas or metro tickets. Cycling an hour a day is enough to keep in ok shape so I don't need to go to the gym.
Best money I have ever spent.
When my wife and I first started dating she wanted to learn to cut hair and wanted a pair of scissors that cost $25, which was a lot for us then. She offered that if I bought her the scissors she'd cut my hair for free as long as we were together. She lied. After 25 years she declared that she'd repaid me for the scissors and was going to stop cutting my hair. Still not a bad deal.
A very expensive suit.
This was the late 90s and I was 20 years old getting paid by the hour to do glorified help desk work. I had dropped out of college a couple semesters in because I needed to work. A recruiter called me out of the blue saying they needed someone right away. Could I interview the next day. The employer was the largest privately held company in the US and they had a reputation for being a VERY conservative suit and tie operation.
All I had was a poor fitting sport coat I got when I worked at circuit city. I called my father and he said go to Nordstroms, explain the situation and they'll get one done for you. So that's what I did and $600 later I'd emptied my bank account and was walking out the door with a new suit freshly altered that night.
I did the interview and just hit it out of the park. They offered me $55K starting salary to do app support. Which in the 90s was a crap ton of money for a guy going from making not a lot of money.
The Amazing Backhoe
I have 6 acres of land with a fair amount of trees on it. I spent about 25k for a backhoe that has saved, and will save me tons of back-breaking work.
It's amazing the amount of stuff I can do that would take huge amounts of energy without the backhoe.
Need a tree taken down and the stump removed? Give me an hour. Need a dead horse buried (true story)? Give me about 2 hours. Need a 100 foot long trench dug for water or power? Give me an hour. Need a 15 foot deep hole dug for who knows what nefarious reason? Give me about 2 hours. Need to flip a car? Give me about 2 minutes. Plow something? Completely destroy your yard? Move that dirt? Drag something heavy? Unstick something stuck?
It was a s***ton of money for me, but incredible what I can do.
They Don't Make 'Em Like This Anymore
Kenmore Washer and Dryer purchased new from Sears in 1998. They are still going strong and I guarantee when they do kick the bucket... the new washer and dryer I'll have to get from Lowes will be lucky to last 10 years.
My wife and I have been sorting pictures. We found one of my grandsons first day home from hospital. Our tan Maytag washer dryer is in the back of the photo just delivered days earlier. The same Maytag is still working daily. It does at least a load a day, she just needs a belt every 3 years.
No More Waiting On Strangers
I live in Minnesota and am a single woman. One winter I missed two shifts at work because my car wouldn't start and I didn't have anyone who could jump it and road side assistance couldn't be there for hours. After that, I went out and spent a little over $100 on a portable car starter. It is a small black box that connects to the battery and jumps the car without needing someone else's car. This has saved me so much time and money.
Also being a single girl who at the time worked at night, I didn't have to worry that some stranger stopping to help might have ulterior motives. I feel much safer and always keep it in my purse. Added bonus, I can charge my phone with it too. I've been singing its praises ever since!
"When my wife and I..."
When my wife and I purchased our home about 25 years ago, I had to go oversess for what turned into an extensive trip. When I came back, we had some really nice Danish furniture She had also purchased very expensive mattresses. Since I did pay for all of this, I take a tiny bit of credit, but it was really her good sense! I am lying on that same bed and mattress now, and all of it is still in great shape, even after many moves including a few international ones. She also taught me that spending good money is worthwhile for dress shoes and appliances. That too has always worked out well in the long run.
"You can buy these cheap..."
Straight razor: You can buy these cheap but are better if you buy a vintage one restored or buy an expensive one new. You will never need to buy blades for your razor ever again. Sure Straight razors are expensive to get into and can seem .....intimidating and Murdery.
Gents when you get the technique down it will provide a better shave than anything else youve used. Ladies as a man who has done drag in a miniskirt and learned to use a straight and use it on your legs is easier than the face and you will never feel a smoother pair of legs in your life. you will never clog the blade because it has no safety bar for the hair to clog up so you could shave off your beard and not hav to worry about clogging up the blade.
"Not an expensive item..."
Not an expensive item, but something totally worth having for large dogs who love to play fetch is getting a Chuck-It stick and balls. Its paid for itself 100 times over.
"Almost 20 years ago..."
Almost 20 years ago, I splurged & spent just over $800 on a set of good tires for my T/A. The better handling was nice, but what really convinced me was when I was be-boppin' along a new road one day, probably about 15 or 20 mph faster than I should've been, came over a slight rise & saw that the road made a sudden 90* turn to the left about 75 or 100 yards ahead - & to make matters worse, there was water on the road!
I hit the brakes as hard as I dared, trying to modulate the pressure & keep the brakes right on the edge of locking up (my car was built before antilock brakes), and I was able to bleed off enough speed to make that turn without going onto the concrete... The wet traction capabilities of those tires saved my butt that day. (There was actually a 2nd time that the wet-traction capabilities of those tires kept me out of a wreck, but I don't remember enough of the details anymore to write about that time.)
I have a different performance car as my daily driver these days, & about a month ago I again spent $800 on a quality set of tires - the difference is, THIS time I wasn't second-guessing myself, wondering if it was a frivolous use of money. Spending a bit of good money on tires is cheaper than replacing sheetmetal (& possibly being injured)!!
A decent mountain bike in 2009 to replace a car (commute to work). Car was paid off but still costing £150+ per month for petrol, insurance and parking. Work was less than five miles away.
Bike cost £450 and was used every weekday from 2009 to 2018 when I started working from home. Cost about £50/year to maintain.
Easily saved over £10K over those nearly ten years and that bike is still going strong. Only downside was in 2011 I hit a patch of ice, came off and busted both arms. That was a fun three months.
Another plus side of cycling in all weathers is that any type of weather now doesn't bother me. Except hail.
My laser eye surgery. Granted, I only had it on the 20th of Feb, but it's a whole different world I'm seeing and it should pay itself off in five year's time.
"We've been together..."
A good pair of Brooks Ghost running shoes.
I'd never spent more than $30 on a pair of shoes. The only time I did spend $30 on shoes was for a friend's wedding. So when I got into running (a few times weekly and the occasional 5k) I cried because my new boyfriend (now husband) said I should invest in high priced, quality shoes. I caved and I've never had to replace a pair of running shoes because they crapped out on me, always because 2 - 5 years later there was another pair I liked out there.
We've been together for 8 years now and that first pair is still going.
"A lot of them..."
A weighted blanket. I get a better quality of sleep with it.
Also, I got a bidet attachment for the toilet a couple years ago. It's a good investment, saves on toilet paper. A lot of them aren't even that pricey.
"I used to buy..."
Bluetooth headphones. I used to buy a pair of wired 10$ headphones monthly because each month the wire would break and I couldn't hear anything. One day I paid 30$ for PSYC Wave X1 bluetooth headphones and they fit perfectly on my ears and not only that, they sound great and they offer great sound cancellation. The only complaint I have about them is not the headphones fault, but Windows 10's fault which is pairing issues. Since I bought them like 2 years ago I've saved 240$ and I think I'll be saving even more until I decide to buy another pair since these ones are beginning to wear out. I tried changing headphones to ones specifically made for gaming and they were the absolute worst, so I'll stick to these, because they're the best.
"My shaving setup..."
My shaving setup was about $250 but now I get better than barber shop quality shaves for about 5 cents per shave.
A good pair of boots, specifically Doc Martens, though really any stupidly sturdy boot works. I only ever have one pair of shoes I regularly wear, and I do a lot of heavy lifting, woodworking, etc etc. I used to get a pair of about $90 boots every year/ year and a half, decided to spend like $150 on a pair of Docs and they have lasted me about 4 or 5 years now of constant, heavy use. Only regret is that I didn't get the more expensive boots with the lifetime warranty that they offer.
Also, less of a money investment and more of a time investment, but antique hand tools. A lot of tools aren't made anymore or aren't made well. And even if they are, they're often intended for use with power tools and don't work well with hand tools. You need to go to tons of yard sales to find some of them, but they'll last longer and work better than anything else on the market.
"My idea behind making these videos..."
I bought an expensive tripod and an expensive mic. I like to make some videos as a hobby to document my travels and my life at sea as a sailor. I haven't saved any money as such, but the presentation of my videos (on YouTube) has improved so much. Now the videos are more stable and sound quality has improved too. My idea behind making these videos is that I can look back at them someday, and now thanks to these purchases, the video documentary documentaries will definitely be more watchable.
"I've probably made..."
When I moved into an apartment with a washer/dryer hookup, I went out and found a used pair for ~$350.
Best investment of my life. I've probably made double that back by now from how much I've avoided spending at the laundromat.
"So it worked out."
I bought a duplex in 2016 right before everything got very expensive in my area. I live in one side and rent out the other. My mortgage is $1000 per month and I collect $1060 in rent each month. So it worked out.
"Don't even remember..."
Dyson vacuum. Bagless. Don't even remember the model. $400.
Got it 15 years ago, thing is a beast and with some attachments can do anything, never even needed maintenance.
"We don't need to..."
A $600 electric fireplace. We don't need to run the heat as high or as often because it heats up the area we stay in the most during the day.
"It drives like a dream..."
I bought a 2014 Honda Accord almost brand new. It has been across USA east to West and back, and from NC to Newfoundland Canada and back, taking scenic drives gravel roads, dirt roads, National Parks, nature views.
Two things that had to be replaced in 140k miles. One headlight burned out, replaced both.
A rear wheel bearing went bad, replaced that.
Plus routine maintenance as recommended by the manufacturer.
It drives like a dream and each road trip, which was about ten thousand miles, only cost me about 1100 dollars in gas which isn't bad considering all the slow driving on scenic routes or gravel /dirt roads.
"I shape my own eyebrows..."
Waxing kit. I shape my own eyebrows and wax about once a month and the kit was less than $60 (so not super expensive to begin with). Definitely paid for itself!
"Takes a week to two..."
Hybrid cars are a good example of this.
My family got a hybrid Toyota RAV-4, because it wasn't much more for that than the regular.
Takes a week to two more before needing gas again, because the car uses both an electric motor & battery + gas when a little extra is needed.
"A really good..."
A really good pair of hiking shoes and coats. Costs a lot at the beginning but will last you through harsh winters and even if worn almost daily last for years. By the time they have worn out I probably am paying the same as I would for cheap versions more regularly that wouldn't work half as well.
My parents bought a hair trimmer almost a decade ago for myself to save money on haircuts and I still use it to this day. I can't even imagine how much money we've saved on haircuts. Probably somewhere in the thousands.
"The money I have saved..."
I bought a great travel backpack that I take everywhere instead of a suitcase. The money I have saved when I fly by not paying for a carry-on or checked bag has easily paid for the bag itself many times over.
"I have a very small wardrobe..."
Clothes. I have a very small wardrobe of good quality clothing that costs a bit of money. When people ask where I get my jeans, work pants, shirt, shoes from etc, and I tell them Nordstrom, they are quick to tell me how they would never spend that much money on clothing. Along with an eye roll to let me know how frivolous I am.
But my clothes last forever compared to their clothes. I don't seem to have the wearing out issues other people do with my clothes.
Also, cloth diapers. A wash for one kid but we don't have to buy any diapers for kid two.
"After we had two children..."
A vasectomy. After we had two children we knew that was a good number for us. We both come from huge families and we know how hard it is financially and emotionally to provide for a large number of kids. Wasn't even that expensive either.
"I've made deals..."
Fishing poles. I've made deals on certain fish I caught and some I've cooked myself. Started fishing when I was 6 and started to cook when I was 8. Ain't nothing better than a boat and a pole.
"15 years later..."
My house. 15 years later and it's worth more than 3 times what I paid for it, and my monthly repayments are so low I couldn't rent a single bedroom flat for the same amount.
"If you're a guy..."
Not expensive, but a rice cooker. If you're a guy, it's essentially a required purchase, and it pays for itself tenfold.
"I started with a snake..."
Plumbing tools. I've saved thousands clearing blockages. I started with a snake and moved on to a plunger, that $50 in tools saved me heaps and started me learning how to use other tools. I have my own sanders, drills, chainsaw and hand tools now.
No one wants war.
Who is going to light the powder keg and set it all off?
Which country will start WW3? Why?
Does anyone really want to start another world war?
They may not have a choice in the matter.
Getting It Out Of The Way Early
"Austrian here, we will do it again probably, I would like to say sorry in advance! Most plausible reason at the moment is because Germans eat schnitzel with sauce on top, then this conflict will spiral out again into WW3."
"Third time's the charm!"
-Some Austrian, probably
Civil War 2: Electric Boogaloo
"It'll be a civil war that devolves into a world war, with no one country clearly responsible for this change."
"But we'll blame it all on germany again, right"
Why I Oughtta...
"At this point, there are enough nukes in the world to ensure that a World War would simply result in nuclear annihilation on all sides. Say what you want about authoritarians like Xi Jinping, Kim Jung Un, and Ali Khameni, they are many things; but they're not suicidal. They know that an all out war would just end everyone, including them, so they're not going to. This is why the US and the USSR never went to all out war, despite coming close a few times; the risks were just too great for both sides."
"What could easily happen, however, is another cold war, this time between the US and China. And like in the Cold War, there could be proxy wars fought as a result of it, but it's unlikely that any country will take the insane risks of starting World War 3."
A full-blown world war is a tricky thing to get off the ground, that is if anyone wants it. The leading cause to impending war could come out of nowhere, or somewhere completely unexpected, or perhaps it will never come.
2-Day War Delivery
"Bruh its gunna be Amazon, not a country"
"Jeff Bezos finna be dropping Amazon basics nukes on us"
Can It Even Happen?
"I don't think the world can handle another world war. simply for the sake that we're all so interconnected. every major nation trades with each other and are in bed with each other. I would be a detriment to whatever country starts a war."
"Think about how the global supply chain has been impacted by the pandemic, the world would probably cease to function all together in a major conflict."
"There was a quote I liked, I think it was from Dan Carlin. He said that leading up to WWI Europe had become too economically entwined to go to war with itself, but none of the economists were invited to the war councils. The generals making the decisions didn't understand the situation so they made dumb decisions. The situation is undoubtably more-so interconnected today, the question is, do we have economists making the call on starting wars?"
A Little Humor Before We Get To The Serious Stuff...
"Probably America, I mean they made Wonder Woman 1 & 2, so highly likely they'd make WW3. At least start it. Not sure why someone else would finish it."
"No, they don't know how to count.. They jumped from WW1 to WW84."
Is it in the realm of possibility? Possibly.
After all, people will be people.
Anyone Else Surprised? No?
"America have a surplus of military might, a recent history of starting wars for profit, EVERYTHING is politicised and extreme nationalism and xenophobia are normalised within the populace. I'm going with them."
These All Feel Tangible
"My guesses would be 1) USA vs China over Taiwan or 2) China vs India (a lot on tension there that doesn't get a lot of news attention)"
"India-Pakistan and China-India are hot beds."
"India and Pakistan have been at war numerous times since their inception. 5 'official' wars and 9 minor skirmishes, to be exact. The last conflict ended with a ceasefire in 2003, but the last incident was a series of skirmishes along the Line of Control in Kashmir, from November 2020 to February 2021."
"Neither is capable of a full-fledged invasion of the other, so it's limited to border disputes. And while Pakistan does have nukes, it would be suicide to use them. There's no incentive for any other countries to get involved."
Going For It
"China making a move on Taiwan or some other land grab in India or other bordering countries."
An Infectious Idea
"India and Pakistan. It will spread to China, then North Korea (or North Korea first) and pull in many others in Asia. This will pull in NATO, either directly or via global partners (Australia)."
This One Makes WAY Too Much Sense
"Twitter. Someone will probably make a typo that everyone takes the wrong way..."
Well, what do you think could happen? Let us know in the comments.
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So let's talk about how a dog owner on Facebook learned her dog's "adorable" behavior was, in fact, furious masturbation.
Readers, if you know anything about me you know I love a good plot twist and I love chonky puppers.
Yesterday, life combined my two great loves in a hilarious and inappropriate way.
I was mindlessly scrolling through my dog groups on Facebook when a video with a few hundred laugh reacts but almost no comments caught my eye.
The still from the video was a pudgy little Frenchie, so obviously I had to read and watch.
The dogs owner shared the video along with a post asking professionals to shed some light on why he does what he does.
Owner-obliviousness as they gushed about how adorable it was made the awkward even better.
The owner explained the Frenchie often makes aggressive eye contact and licks his lips while he "plays air guitar"—which is what the family calls it—and how cute & funny they all find the behavior.
The video was the dog, casually chilling, using his paw to rub the tip of his penis while staring awkwardly at the camera and licking his lips like a pup possessed.
Three hundred and fifteen laugh-reacts—at the time that I saw it—and only three comments:
1. a vet explaining that the behavior showed in the video was the dog masturbating while making direct eye contact
2. the owner giving a simple "thank you" and
3. the admins of the group closing the comments.
So, why am I sharing this with you?
Because Reddit user Drakmamman asked:
"Dog owners of reddit, what the dog doin?"
... and so now you get this whole article just so I had an excuse to tell y'all about a furiously fapping Frenchie, 'cause somebody else needed to know about him.
I cackled for a good 20 minutes imagining the family getting all giddy about their dog "playing air guitar"—making the little air guitar meedly squeedly noises while he played, maybe even playing along thinking they're enjoying a fun little game—but they're really just been giving a hair metal soundtrack to their dogs stroke sesh.
Something tells me now the owner knows what "air guitar" really is, they're not likely to rush and tell Reddit all about how they've been gathering as a family to watch cause it's just so cute.
That's what I'm here for.
Anyway, here's the stuff other people's dogs are up to. It's not fapping—or if it is, the owners aren't telling Reddit.
"Wife just came home with the baby. Dog is acting like she's been abandoned for years running up and down, barking and jumping on everything."
"They'd only been out an hour and I was with her the whole time." - Single_Goose7015
"My dog does this too when my wife comes home. Like what am I, chopped liver?" - jackof47trades
"I feel your pain. My dog started howling mournfully when my partner went back to work last week… I was right there!" - TreatOutside
"Staring at the door waiting for the only human he cares about to come home (obviously not me)" - SnarkyRedhead
"Probably trying to herd the cats."
"He's a border collie mix who's afraid of goats and sheep, but even after six years of living with them he still thinks he can control where the cats go."
"He's a good boy, he's very persistent, but not terribly bright sometimes." - TokesNotHigh
"After 8 years our border collie still herds the cats, and the vacuum." - psychologicaluse28
"Big heart, small brain. I have one of those dogs too. They are the sweetest." - Technobucket
"She has flung herself flat across the bed and is playing dead, quiet except for the occasional pitiful whine. Every now and then she lifts her head up and fixes a desperate look upon me, silently begging for release from her wretched existence."
"She's a bit overdramatic about having to wear a cone. The issue is an abrasion on a toe that she won't stop licking, which is making it worse."
"I've been alternating between bandaging it and having her wear a cone. She's been consistently a drama queen." - halfinboxes
"Staring at me because their dinner time is in one hour and they need to start letting me know that, in an hour, they need to eat...in an hour, so I better not forget...cuz they're hungry, which is why they're staring at me...and it's almost dinner time."
"Just one more hour, And they want to make sure I don't forget. Because maybe I will."
"So, they need to remind me. By staring at me. Every day. One hour before dinner." - MotherOfFred
A Little "Light" ExerciseGiphy
"Mine loves light reflected off watches or phones. And loves lasers."
"It's sunny and he sees light on the wall so he is bothering me to use my watch or phone so he can chase the light. I've spent the last hour doing it."
"I even got him a cat laser toy that's automatic for him and he runs himself tired as all hell with it. But he is STILL asking for it."
"Used the laser toy also too, so he is panting dripping tongue and still wants to play more..." - boomgoon
"Last night my dogs chased down and killed a rabbit in the backyard. They are usually so gentle; this was weird and unexpected."
"I watched the whole thing helpless because it was so fast. The rabbit screamed, it was insane."
"Now, I'm watching them sleep on my couch and can't help but think they just murdered someone."
"They are just vicious predators, right here, in my house. On my couch."
"But they snuggly as f*ck. This trips me out." - Atheist_Redditor
A Problematic PrincessGiphy
"We have two chihuahuas. One is a 15 year old (quite appropriately) named Princess and one is a one year old named Charlie."
"Both have their own dog beds on the couch since they are spoiled."
"When Princess is feeling particularly moody or like asserting her dominance, she will drag Charlie's bed into her bed and lay on top of BOTH of them and snarl at him if he comes close to her personal space bubble/bed mountain."
"And when we tell her she can't have both beds and put his bed back to the side, she just glares at us. Lol." - mslm90
"She's currently in her cage resting after her great adventure."
"She managed to get upstairs and grab a hold of one of my shoes. Not just any old shoe, but one of the shoes I am planning to wear this weekend for my wedding."
"After running around, she dropped the shoe to chew on a shirt - at which point she was cornered, and then brought downstairs."
"Pup and shoe are both unharmed and doing well. My nerves, not so much." - still_interesting23
So ... what's YOUR dog been up to lately?
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Have you ever fantasized about what it would be like to win the lottery? Having money for the rest of your life, as far as the eye can see, to cover your expenses.
And have you thought about all the things you would buy if you could really afford them? Are they ALL practical things, or are some of them silly?
We always love to fantasize about what life would be like if money were no object. And you are not alone!
Redditor OnlyVillager asked:
"If you won the lottery, what's something 'useless' that you would buy?"
Here were some of those answers.
I Be The Witch Of The Wood
"My teenage daughter disclosed to me the other day that her biggest life goal is to buy a house on an acreage that has a large wooded area."
"She plans to build me a house in the woods, fund whatever ridiculous bullsh*t art installations I want to erect in the woods, then spread rumors in neighboring towns that a witch lives back there."
"She's the best."-OpossumJesusHasRisen
My Kingdom For A Castle
"I'm blowing it all on a castle. No, not one of those fairy tale mansions from the 19th century robber barons called 'castles'.
"A fully loaded, honest-to-god, obsolete, medieval fortress. Two curtain walls, a keep, towers, barbican, portcullis, murderholes, loopholes, machicolations, the works. It'll be a well warmed summer retreat/place to hide out if another plague hits the world."
"I'm buying Au Train island in the Upper Peninsula to be specific. When the feds finally come after billionaires to pay their fair share, I'm running to my island and sealing the gates behind me."
"So I can get my affairs in order and pay my taxes. What were you thinking I was gonna do? Hide from the IRS? They can breach any castle lmao."-DaemonTheRoguePrince
I Wanna Be A Billionaire
- "I want a cold water dispenser on my desk. It has to be connected to the water line, filtered and cooled. Ideally it also has that thing that automatically knows when the container is almost full."
- "My new lifestyle would be to live 4 weeks in a different city, then 1 week at home. In each city, I would stay in a Luxury Airbnb or a five star hotel."
- "I would hire a professional soccer coach. I'm talking someone that trains pro players. I'm Arab and I'm tired of not being good at soccer, just a few months of lessons and I'll be able to participate in pick up games and have fun."
- "I would also hire singing, guitar and piano instructors. Singing would be the toughest because my voice sucks, but I figure with time I can be good enough to sing a song if I want to reference it. That's how bad I am today."-Reformedjerk
Imagine just not having to think when you click the "purchase" button.
A Nice Siesta
"Maybe not exactly "useless" in the way people are thinking (the way the question is asked makes me think by "useless" they mean "stupid/wasteful" but I'm thinking in terms of things that are fun and only for the purpose of having fun), but do vacations count?"
"If I had that much money all to myself, I would 100% rather have a regular sized house/car and spend the money on experiences instead."
"The idea of having a normal life but knowing that I can just decide to take the day off and go to DisneyLand or treat myself to a fancy dinner whenever the hell I want to is a fantasy I've had since I was literally a little kid."
"I get that those aren't useful things because they're not things I could USE like a car/house/purse/etc, but I'd definitely be happy:)"-StreetIndependence62
"Well this stuff is only useless if there isn't some sort of apocalyptic event that happens in my lifetime."
"That said, I'd go full prepper and bury myself a bunker in the desert with tons of food and water stored away and decked out with solar panels, a garage full of electric cars, and a stash of every sort of modern electronic equipment available in vast quantities."
"So this would be a huge waste of money if there's never an apocalypse. But it would be very valuable to me if there happens to be one."-TimHawks1983
"I have always wanted a talking toilet. I don't even know why at this point. I just saw it on a tv show, don't even remember what, and since that day I have thought 'yes, I want this.'"
"But right now, with my paupers wage, I cannot afford such a thing. I have a lot of serious plans for lottery level money. I would open a shelter for homeless people and start my own dog shelter. As well as my own theme park."
"But I would still get a talking toilet."-MagnificentColossus
Put Your Bird On My Shoulder
"I would get into falconry, vintage guitars from the 50s and 60s, a live in Cook, most of the surfaces that I touch would be marble, and I would save a significant portion of my money to split between investments and gambling on riskier stocks."
"Depending on how much money a private jet would be in the cards as well as a flight license. This is one of my favorite things to daydream about"-freemason777
The best part of all of this is, it doesn't matter that these things are useless.
They bring us joy, and that is what matters.
"Boring" "Flame Thrower"???
"Definitely a boring company flame thrower. And a Barrett M82."
"Probably a supercar too, but not to drive it. I want to light it on fire in a public space as an appeal to consumerism right before I go take a private jet to Nappa Valley to eat at the French Laundry and get hammered on the most expensive bottles of wine I can find."-xdylanxfrommyspace
"There are many things I bought that I regretted it immediately. I love to try new stuff. Especially no-brand or brand that is not famous. My curiosity is very high, that is the problem."
"I wanted to know whether those products are okay for human being. For example, I bought BioAqua face products. The most product I regret is BioAqua aloe vera. After my third use of the product, I actually experience worst allergic in the world."
"My skin had a lot of red patches appeared in just few hours. It was itchy but not painful. Just I keep scratching my skin but I tried my best to control it."
"It took about three - five days to keep it clear with medication and creams. Then after a couple of weeks, I decided to use it again. I got the reaction."
"Thankfully, I still have the medication and the cream. So, I took it immediately. I also did not apply the cream that much compared to previous time."
"I still have the aloe vera bottle in my room. I wanted to throw it but I could not throw it. Yet, I cannot use it and yes, I feel sad when I saw it. So, you can understand how I feel."-nimbledealing53
Hobby Hobby Hobby!
"If I won the lottery - I would open a shop for my favorite hobby. I would manage it like a business, giving a decent wage to several workers allowing them to pursue a degree or whatever and have a job that doesn't suck."
"I'd lose money on running a store. But I'd enjoy it. I'd enjoy sharing my hobby, selling the stuff I love at reasonable prices and giving a few young people a good job in a stress free environment."
"Useless store, great life experience for the people I'd employ."-Dealthagar
Money doesn't solve all of the world's problems or all of a person's problems, even—but it certainly does make life a little easier here and there for those who need it.
Hopefully the 21st century sees all of us buying things with our millions of dollars.
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One of the most freeing realizations I've had was when I understood that not everyone was going to like me.
That's just the way it is for all of us, and I learned that it would be unfair for me to dedicate so much time worrying about what others might think.
It changed my life—improved it, I'd say.
That, combined with my willingness to take responsibility for my own actions, was crucial to my self-development.
Whether it's an epiphany or experience, there are many things that can happen and can successfully shift your perspective.
People shared their stories after Redditor drewyourstory asked the online community:
"What life event or experience changed your perspective?"
"From this, I learned..."
"Nearly died of a post-surgical hypoxic brain injury, followed by a variety of problems subsequently."
"From this, I learned that mortality is a fragile thing in a random, amoral universe."
It truly is. We really have no say in it either.
We really do not have control.
"Once you get your own place..."
"Once you finally get your own place, you appreciate and feel gratitude for things that you used to take for granted."
"It's helped me maintain..."
"My husband died after a sudden short illness. My life is divided by that point in time."
"There is before and after, I'm a different person now nearly 12 years later but I'm okay with that. It's helped me maintain a good perspective dealing with my current partner's stroke."
"He's doing ok but will never have the mobility he once had. Just taking one day at a time."
Sorry for your loss.
Silver linings exist... even in tragedy.
"I can put up with..."
"My spouse developed a chronic pain illness. She spent months in debilitating pain and there wasn't a goddamn thing I could do to help."
"When we finally got a diagnosis, she was able to start on some medications that improved her quality of life to near where it had been."
"Suddenly little problems just didn't seem important anymore. I can put up with a whole hell of a lot more than I ever thought possible because at least my partner's not in burning pain constantly anymore."
Thankfully, your partner is healthier, and the experience undoubtedly made you a stronger person!
"I had both hips replaced..."
"I had both hips replaced at 25 and will owe money for the rest of my life."
"My debt to income ratio keeps me from normal things like owning a house. I don't sweat missing a bill now and then anymore."
Society really should not allow this to happen.
"I think every single human..."
"I think every single human has experienced the feeling of post-traumatic guilt caused by something they've done in the past."
"For example, in elementary school, I had a best friend whose family was struggling financially. One day, he brings coins (pennies and nickels only) for his school lunch that day."
"I, for some stupid reason, smacked the change out of his hand as he took the change out to count how much he had."
"I got yelled at by the principal, who was walking behind me, and got suspended. Ever since that day, I have never ever made fun of someone's financial stability, given people money (especially the homeless), and never smacked anything out of anyone's hands."
"That moment changed my perspective on how the treatment towards others comes back to bite you."
"Holding my eight year old brother as he died from extreme medical incompetence then being stuck with his body for twenty minutes as a ventilator made his corpse breathe and a fault in the heart monitor didn't trigger the alarm to bring help and the nurses ignored the call light because they were 'busy with another patient'."
"I cared about people before then. I can switch that off and on at will now."
"Being from Canada..."
"Being from Canada, we're pretty sheltered here, so traveling to other parts of the world and seeing how poor some communities are really made me realize how lucky we are and how good we have it."
Many people in the Western world would learn a hell of a lot if they were humbled by the way others around the world live.
"I love him..."
"Having a child with autism. He is the most loving, kind, intelligent young man."
"I love him more than anything in the world, but I have to consider everyday events that others take for granted. There are things that will be overly stressful for him, and without any glaring differences, people are often not understanding."
"Family gatherings, grocery store visits, haircuts, the dentist, everything is planned."
"The world can be a noisy, chaotic, inconsistent place which are all things he really hates, but he meets every challenge head-on and I couldn't be prouder to call him my son."
"Have you ever just stood..."
"Have you ever just stood and looked at a dead person? The first dead person I ever saw was my father... I've seen probably more than my share after that too."
"Looking at someone with their lights permanently turned off changes something in you."
No one is immune from life's tragedies or trials and tribulations.
How do you handle them, though? That's the real test.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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