At the risk of sounding like a total curmudgeon, not enough people have manners these days!
The simple acts of "please" and "thank you"? Lost! People press buttons on adjacent floors of elevators of 36 story buildings!
It just doesn't make any sense. In the words of Full House, whatever happened to dependability?
u/icecoldcokezero asked:
What is a basic etiquette everyone should know but not everyone follows?
Here were some of the answers.
Subway Etiquette
GiphyLet others off before you get on
Holy sh*t some people don't get this one. I've seen people just itching to get on the bus, so I've intentionally started moving before the bus stops so that I can be at the doors when they open, and they STILL try to get on before I've managed to get off.
Conversation Etiquette
Listen to the content of what other people are saying before replying.
To expand on this, listen to understand what someone is saying, not just to respond to it.
Listen so you hear when they make a short break so you can jump in and completely change the subject. This is my favorite thing to see people do, a real trait.
Music Etiquette
Headphones aren't optional in a public space. No one wants to hear your music or your video clips playing.
Also, kids can use headphones too. Don't make us listen to your kid's videos full blast when out in public mkay?
Egress Etiquette
When walking with several friends on a sidewalk, pair up two by two instead of everyone walking in a row so others can pass you on the sidewalk.
I work on a university campus and college kids seem particularly oblivious to this.
"I Do Need To Leave My House At Some Point" Etiquette
Don't park your f*cking vehicle in front of driveways or garages. In my current job this is a daily problem, I assumed most people would know that its not cool, but I clearly overestimated the intellect of humanity on that one. Dicks.
This has only happened to me once and I decided to let it slide. They were trimming a tree that my neighbor and I shared. So the truck was kinda blocking my driveway. Decided just to hang out in my house for a little bit longer instead of leaving then. But if this happened more often I would be salty
"The Line Is Not Optional" Etiquette
I'll never forget this one time this happened. It has happened to me many times but this one instance, the instant karma was so gratifying.
I was waiting in line at the Publix deli. So most people know you have to take a number and they call out your number to serve you. But when there is a lot of people we all kinda bunch together and it looks like a line.
Well this mother and her 12 year old daughter come in and you see the mother look around, I'm standing in this "line" of people looking at my phone waiting for my number to be called. I see this mother sneak in front of me. And I knew she was attempting to cut in front of me just based on her body language and facial expressions. I don't know how else to explain it. So she takes her place in the "line" and after the next person finishes (it would have been my turn) she walks right up to the deli and the woman asks is she is number such and such. Highly embarrassed and feigning complete ignorance, she looks at me and motions for where the numbers are. I point to it and with the biggest smile walk up to the deli and give them the number. Best day ever. Best part is, she was now at the end of the line because several other people had grabbed numbers while she was trying to blend in after "cutting" in front of me.
Moving Etiquette
let people get off the f*cking elevator first.
stand to the right on the escalator.
don't block doors on the metro/subway, no matter how crowded it is.
don't stand in the middle of a sidewalk staring at your phone.
don't stand on opposite sides of a hallway having a long conversation.
so many rules about standing/walking that people just don't seem to understand.
Human Etiquette
There is no person that everyone likes.
It's ok to admit when you were wrong.
You don't always have to have an opinion on everything. Saying "I don't know" is fine.
Forgiving people goes a long way.
Relations Etiquette
If you're mad at a company for some transgression, don't take your rage out on the customer service rep. Chances are, this person has people freaking out at them all day for things they have no control over. Be kind to customer service people - they are likely having a crappy day.
Public Conversation Etiquette
GiphyA huge pet peeve of mine is people who can't keep their mouth shut- that just have to constantly hear the sound of their voice.
The other day in the sauna at my gym, there was this guy doing that- he randomly asks another guy what he thought of Bernie Sanders running for president. They went back and forth for like 30 seconds but the other guy clearly wasn't interested and it tapered off. Not even a minute later. "Bro". "Bro", he nudges me. "You ever watch Shameless?"
"No." Doing the least possible to engage him here.
Asks another guy the same question 2 minutes later.
Shut the f*ck up, people. Small talk is fine, I'm not some anti social *sshole but you can learn to enjoy silence and not needing to have a conversation with every stranger you see. Especially in a situation like this- you're essentially holding people captive and forcing them to listen to your bullsh*t.
No Touchy
Don't touch people unless they say it's ok.
Don't touch people's pets unless they say it's ok (and don't complain if you do it anyway and get bit by a nervous animal).
Hallway Rulez
You walk in the halls the same way you drive in your car.
- Stay on your side of the hallway, dipping only to go around people.
- If someone is stopped in the way (and you can't go around), speak (like honking) don't push (bumping their vehicle).
- Wave in passing, don't stop in the middle of the route to have extended discussions.
Why Me Worry?
GiphyIf you can't explain your opponent's side in a way that they'd agree with (due to either lack of knowledge or due to your emotional connection to your own side), then you don't know enough to be arguing them, or you're too emotionally biased to see the argument clearly.
The Golden Rule: No Track Suits
-if you are well dressed on a plane and there is a flight delay or cancellation, the ticket agent will help you in a way that she wouldn't if you were in a tracksuit. The preceding principle also applies to the following situatons: At restaurants, in certain nightclubs, taxi-hailing and when being pulled over by a policeman.
- never blame anger or a state of inebriation for a bad decision you've taken
- call it quits in time, whatever it is, rather than let it go on far too long in a wrong direction
- always explain and say goodbye to a person with whom you were romantically involved with, rather than becoming a ghost all of the sudden
- always treat people in the service industry how you'd want to be treated if your roles were switched
Maybe Trump Could Use This Advice
You don't need to understand someone to respect their wishes or believe they mean what they say they feel.
In other words: you don't have to be transgender to use someone's preferred pronoun; you don't have to understand why something you consider trivial someone else finds bullying or harassment before you stop doing it; you don't need to get why someone's relationship works to respect it; you don't need to understand why someone believes or doesn't believe in a certain religion to support their rights.
Your understanding is not a prerequisite to seeing others as people as opposed to symbols of otherness.
You're Literally In A Place Where You Can And Should Park
If you're going to park in a parking lot to wait for someone, park in a designated parking space.
It's unbelievable how many times I see someone parked by the curb or in one of the lanes of the parking lot, disrupting traffic without a care in the world.
You're in a parking lot. Take the extra 20 seconds to find a space while you wait for you passengers to return.
Things People Will Never Order At A Restaurant
Reddit user DGex asked: 'Reddit. What will you never order at a restaurant?'
Be it an old familiar, or a new establishment that has been the talk of the town, restaurant diners are always faced with a challenge once they are handed a menu.
Do they stick with what they know, and order the burger and fries or spaghetti and meatballs, which are both difficult to screw up?
Or do they get a little adventurous, and try the restaurant's specialité, even if it's something they've never tried before in their lives?
Generally speaking, it tends to be on a case-by-case basis based on the restaurant they are dining in.
Of course, some people have such an aversion to certain ingredients or dishes, that no matter the location, they will never order it.
"Reddit. What will you never order at a restaurant?"
Not What, But When...
"I'll never order 10 minutes before closing."- bearstrugglethunder
Speaking From Experience
"Ice in my drink."
"After decades in the industry, I've only ever seen one change the ice machine filters and clean the bin regularly."-Anna_Namoose
"I have almost twenty years of experience managing bars and restaurants."
"What do you think I won't get? "
"Stylish or not?"
"Ice."
"In everything."
"I can assure you that I have saw far more appalling ice machines in back of houses than immaculate ones."- Tricky_Routine138
ice waiting GIF by tarninabarnGiphyStay Consistent
"Anything outside of what their core business is."
"Not ordering fish at a steakhouse, a burger at a Mexican restaurant etc."- KinkyPTDoc
Why Pay For What You Can Make Yourself?
"Quesadilla."
"I'm not paying for tortillas and cheese."
"I always have that sh*t at home."- DGex
"Pasta."
"I can make it at home, I'm a decent cook and can make most pasta dishes at home."
'I eat out to have foods I can't make."
'I'm usually disappointed when I do order it."- bensmom2020
"Tuna fish sandwich."- Limp-Persimmon-5729
"A grilled cheese sandwich."
"There's just no way a restaurant can elevate it to make it worth the cost."- manderifffic
Hungry Grilled Cheese GIF by U by Kotex BrandGiphyCasear, Cobb, Waldorf...NOPE!
"Salad."
"It’s so cheap to buy the ingredients and most restaurant salad comes from a bag."
"It’s just dumb in 85% of the cases."- humancalculus
"$17+ salad."- Monowakari
Split It, Maybe?
"Oh, I've got a good one."
"Do not order the lasagna if you visit Brio Tucsan Grille."
"It's not awful, fantastic, or extraordinary; it's just normal."
"But why, you say, would you advise against eating a typical meal?"
"Considering that it contained 5200 calories. calories for two days."
"When I removed empty dishes from the table in front of guests, I would shudder."- KeyPersimmon445
If You Can't See The Sea, Maybe Avoid Seafood...
"In a location not known for its seafood, lobster."
"Where are they going to get lobster, anyway?"- WillingnessInner9666
"Rocky Mountain Oysters."- Rollin_Soul_O
Eight Is A Few Too Many Legs...
"Anything cephalopod."- FarewellMyQueen
Pbs Nature Sea GIF by Nature on PBSGiphyUnless They Pick The Leaves Themselves...
"Tea."
'Compared to how much it costs to make at home, it's stupidly overpriced at restaurants."- Pure_Block_5309
There's nothing wrong with being a picky eater.
That being said, it's always worth trying something new before deciding you don't like it.
Even if no one should blame you for refusing to order sushi at a pizza counter.
"Never dip your pen in the company ink."
An age-old cautionary saying urging people not to get romantically entangled with their coworkers.
Doing so used to be illegal at many companies, whereas now it's grown to become a bit more commonplace, and often results in some cases of wedded bliss and happily ever afters (as demonstrated by The Office's Jim and Pam.)
Of course, when entering a relationship with a coworker, be it a one night stand or a committed, multi-year relationship, there is always the risk that it might not end well, resulting in your being forced to see your ex every day at the office (Bridget Jones anyone?)
"People who slept with a coworker, what happened after?"
Well, That's A Success?
"We became friends and she donated a kidney to me lol."- Headbobby
As If Nothing Had Changed...
"Got married 2 years later."
"'Co-worker' can mean different things and different circumstances, for instance:"
"Our company had 130,000 employees world-wide."
"Our group was housed in a building with 1,000 employees."
"We were not in each other's chain of command."
"It could have been somewhat awkward if it did not work out, but not awful."
"It did work out."
"Later on, saved money by carpooling!"- SyntheticOne
The Office Laughing GIF by NBCGiphyJust Couldn't Fight The Chemistry
"We were both working as actors in a small film, cast as romantic leads."
"She noticed I got tense when we had to kiss... and suggested we go on a date to practice kissing."
"We played mini-golf and practiced kissing."
"Then we continued practicing in her car in the parking lot after the mini-golf place closed until a cop came to investigate."
"Then we got a hotel room and practiced other stuff."
'I guess I'm a slow learner because she's still giving me remedial lessons."- Jake_Science
Nothing Personal, One Hopes..
"She had to fire me."
"Poor performance."- bilvester
Consider Long Term Goals First
"Fun."
"Highly recommend if you have a job."
"Do not recommend if you have a career."- bluegiant85
Renee Zellweger Office GIF by Working TitleGiphyOn To Bigger And Better Things
"Dated discreetly and after four years we got engaged."
"We then both told our supervisors we were leaving in the summer."
"At our last meeting as they were doing their good bye lunch for both of us with about 30 coworkers, they had us say a few words."
"I went first and said I was moving to a new city."
"Then it was my fiancés turn and she said she was also moving to that city, with me, because we’re engaged."
"It was glorious."
"We are happily married for 13 years and have an awesome daughter."
"Life is goooood."- lmc227
Jealous Much?
"I had a supervisor that I really hit it off with and had great chemistry."
"As soon as they found out we were dating, she got fired and immediately found a better job."
"We've been married for almost 13 years now."
"I feel I should clarify a little bit while still keeping the details as vague as possible because quite a few people worked there."
"She was my boss in the sense that if she told me something needed taken care of, I was expected to take care of it."
"She didn't actually have the power to fire me if our relationship went south, but she probably could have gotten me fired if she had been that type of person."
"We worked there for two years before anything remotely physical happened."
"Our lunch breaks lined up."
"After a few conversations, we became friendly and started spending most of that hour shooting the sh*t with each other."
"I was crushing on her hard, but didn't think she'd be interested in dating one of the janitors, so I didn't say anything in an effort not to make things weird at work."
"One day I let it slip to one of the other janitors that I had a crush on her."
"He thought it would be hilarious to immediately go and tell her what I said."
"The next day, she asked me if I had really said that."
"I was really embarrassed but admitted that I had said it."
"She basically told me she was feeling the same way and gave me her number."
"11 months later, we were married."
"There were two guys in upper management that had asked her out and been rejected."
"Their egos obviously took a hit when they found out she chose me."
"She was fired after being blamed for someone else's mistake."
"Then they refused to show the proof that she was the one responsible."
"It was bullsh*t, but it only took her two weeks to find a job that paid a lot more."
"Once they did that to her, I immediately became a terrible employee and openly talked sh*t about everyone in management until they really had no choice but to fire me."- Imahorrible_person
Nothing Lost, Nothing Gained
"We did it a couple of times then both went on with our lives."
"It was just something we both wanted to do temporarily."
"Neither one of us wanted it to be serious or long-term, and so it wasn’t."- Listening_Heads
No Regrets Whatsoever
"We moved in together, got engaged, bought a house and had a baby."
"Don't let a job get in the way of your life."- AllSonicGames
Who'd Have Guessed...
"I slept with my boss back in 93."
"She instigated it."
"She’s sitting beside me."
"30 years later and two adult kids."
"Worked out!"
"I should add we did NOT care for each other at first. It was definitely not a case of 'will they, won’t they' but more of a 'will he quit or won’t he?'"
"Funny how life works."- Uncle_Bug_Music
Proceed With Caution
"Fun while it lasted, but very awkward after."- BrianH-84
Love cannot, and should not be denied, even if it is a coworker.
Anyone looking for a one and done, however, might want to look beyond the walls of your office.
Unless you like constantly being reminded of your past mistakes.
It can take a lot of courage to put yourself out there and let someone know you're interested.
As long as they're not creepy, aggressive, or crazy, it should be flattering, right?
If you're straight and a person of the same gender as you flirts with you, this should be easy to deal with.
In most cases, it took a lot more courage for them to ask than for you to hear.
The following question has been asked to many a straight guy over the years.
Let's see how the times and reactions have progressed.
Redditor FregeanCoder wanted the heteronormative gents out there to share with us, so they asked:
"Straight men, how would you react if a man hit on you?"
I've flirted with many a straight guy, and 99% of the time, it's all gone over well even if they turned me down.
Be Polite
buster keaton GIFGiphy"I've told them thank you but not interested."
twinturboboosted
"Pretty much this for me as well, no need to get scared, but at the same time I did have one super creep, not a comfortable experience."
Empty_Jellyfish_1995
Happy Endings
"My response was, 'I’m flattered, but it’s not my thing.' Guy insisted on buying me that drink anyway as an apology. Thirty years later, we’re still friends. I was best man at his wedding, and now they’re both like brothers to me."
ElectricTurtlez
"Wow, an 'apology' - for flattering you!? Maybe he felt that he made you uncomfortable. Sounds like a generous and humble person."
BoringBob84
"I wish men could do that when women reject them. For some reason, if a woman rejects a straight man he thinks 'being friends' is like a punishment."
Joygernaut
Aww Shucks
"My wife and I were at a gay bar with some friends and one time while alone a young man offered to buy me a drink… it was the most flattering feeling, which I of course told him as I politely declined. He must have been having a rough patch since he was very attractive and had no business hitting on a guy like me. Or maybe it was late and he was drunk."
corona-lime-us
"You could have been his type. Never know."
twinturboboosted
"Haha. Perhaps. I’ll cling to the possibility. I’m just grateful my wife agreed to marry me before I discovered IPA’s and how to smoke meat!!!"
corona-lime-us
Keeping it
"I had a man I thought was hitting on my girlfriend and telling us both multiple times he was into threesomes tell me in a forceful way at the end of the night was gay. I said ah, that's cool man good for you! He walked away looking kind of sad and defeated. It wasn't until the next day that we realized he was hitting on me and we all had a chuckle at my obliviousness."
Gettinrekt1
No Harm
"Well normally at first I’m polite and say no thanks in some way or straight out. If it ends there it’s amusing no harm done. But just like with women if they are overly aggressive after then it’s a lot different. Ashamed of how common that type of stuff is. It has nothing to do with people's sex life. People are capable of all kinds of things. We know this but seem to act like it doesn’t happen."
_Dirty_Deedz_
OHHHHHH!!!!
Seth Meyers Pain GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy"Probably the same way as when a woman hits on me - be oblivious to it until weeks later when it suddenly dawns on me."
Eccentric_Fixation
I always hate that A-HA moment.
Like, where was my mind at in the moment.
SEE MEEE!!!
Jim Carrey Flirting GIFGiphy"I'm gay, my oldest friend is straight. Took him to a gay bar once. He got very offended that no one tried to hit on him."
J8766557
Why not?
"I'm a straight, bearded, short but pretty muscular guy living in (very liberal) Berlin. Apparently, that's attractive for a lot of gay men so I'm getting hit on by men pretty regularly, a lot more than by women. I usually just tell them I'm not gay and then it depends on their reaction."
"Keep talking, do more drinking, keep dancing... Why not? I've been on the opposite side after a rejection by a woman and it's nice to just keep having a good time instead of an awkward exit that you'll cringe about 10 years later randomly."
Magnetobama
Back when we danced
"Not sure how it works nowadays with apps like Grindr but in the late 90s/2000s, we had a gay club in our city (no longer exists and there’s not another one unless you drive 30 min to a town over). Anyway, I was the straight friend in a group of gay guys because I loved EDM and I think by association, other gay men thought I was gay."
Always flattered, politely said no and they would turn to the next guy waiting in line for a drink and hit on them. Rinse and repeat. I think what I learned is that men regardless of sexual preference are all horny and will try again and again until they find someone down to clown."
irn
Thanks, Corey
"I was at a house party and he started hitting on me. I kind of panicked and said I was dating one of the girls at the party. Went over to her after and asked her to play along because he was hitting on me and I didn’t want to start a fuss. Ended up hooking up with her later that night and 16 years later were married with 2 kids. At our wedding speech, I thanked him even though he wasn’t there. Corey wherever you are, thanks bud."
reload88
Beautiful Hair
"Happened to me by a coworker. I very politely explained I wasn’t gay but it never changed my opinion of him. He eventually thanked me for dealing with it the way I did and I explained it wasn’t necessary to say thanks. I asked him why me though. He replied, 'You’ve got one hell of a head of beautiful hair!' And he was right."
Particular-Paper-558
Be Fair
Criminal Minds Fist Bump GIF by IONGiphy"I flirt a little but make sure he knows I'm straight and there is no opportunity for us to be anything but friends. Gay dudes are some of the best friends a straight guy can have and I don't give a f**k what anyone thinks about that. Just don't lead them on, it's not fair to them."
somedoofyouwontlike
Well it does sound like we've come a long way.
It's nice to know.
Let's flirt.
Whether we realize it or not, we have certain "tells" that will signal to other people what life is like at home, whether we're hard workers or parents or travelers.
Even single men, despite their age, have certain characteristics that can be spotted from a mile away.
Curious, Redditor hamsterdumpster asked:
"What screams 'single male lives here'?"
Questionable Decor
"Anything but a curtain acting as a curtain."
- Some-Nice-Basil
Minimalist By Nature
"When I first heard the description of a minimalist I was confused because as a single male, I had been living like that for years..."
- jnd_photography
A Glimpse into the Bathroom
"Three empty bottles of head and shoulders still in the shower, prob another bottle half full with tons of excess shampoo dried all around the outside."
"A small pile of leftover Irish spring soap bars maybe we can smash 'em together and make a full bar one day."
- Omnivore_Omri_23
Very Elaborate
"There's just a mattress on the floor in the bedroom."
- gambito705
Bottle Collections
"Empty liquor bottles lined up as decor."
- miranda_alexis
No Place for the Garbage
"There's no trash can in the bathroom."
- Iilsmokey
Key Characteristics
"Empty fridge except for a random beer and leftovers. White plastic chair. Everything black...black couch, black picture frames, black desk. Etc."
- elvishranger
Central TV
"A really big single-seat recliner in front of a massive TV with game consoles under it. Not that there's anything wrong with gaming, but there's a certain level of being committed to staying single when you have just one chair in your loungeroom, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Totallycasual
Shaving Day
"Stubble in the sink."
- Ok_Wave_7358
"And behind the sink faucets."
- Urrrsagrrl
National Pride
"A random flag hanging on the living room wall."
- bucktop
New Standard in Bedding Sets
"Using tee shirts as pillowcases. Lol (laughing out loud)."
- Ok-Mood9454
"Can confirm, have done this. They're about the same size and sometimes I can't (be bothered to) find a pillowcase."
- whyamionfireagain
Stereotypical Decor
"According to 90’s romcom/sitcoms: Lava lamp and a beanbag chair."
- sorentomaxx
"Can confirm: I love lava lamps."
- ithinkoutloudtoo
External Closet
"Speaking from experience. I got tired of having a floordrobe so I got an absolutely giant clothes drying rack where all of my clean clothes go."
- Bribase
"'This pile is clean, that pile is dirty.'"
- GSturges
"'...That pile is dirty but wearable.'"
- wageslave645
The Single Man Starter Pack
"Bare white walls or a s**tty poster on them... A large TV with no furniture other than a futon serving double duty as a bed... Beer everywhere, even on the ceiling."
- Barmacist
Enough Said
"All of the pizza boxes."
- somedream
"I called it the leaning tower of pizza."
- TheMohawkMan
While there's nothing wrong with being single, a guy should be mindful of what he keeps in his home, how he behaves, and even how his clothes appear, if he for some reason doesn't want to disclose to others that he's single or living alone.