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Every year, people unite for one day just to screw with people. Spring has begun, and moods are generally positive. April Fool's Day is an opportunity to knock it all down. Don't waste it.

aab1020 asked: We are now less than 45 days from April Fool's Day. What 'long con' pranks should be started around now?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


"Honey, that house looks familiar..."

We spent 2 months in Europe 2 summers ago and rented out the house on Airbnb to cover expenses while gone. One of the renters was a film crew that shot a documentary about a local psychopath who killed a few people. The producers needed a home setting where they could interview witnesses and people who knew the guy or victims. There are plenty of interviews of people describing the murders and how evil this person was that clearly show our living room, guest room and kitchen in the background. My wife was not involved in managing the Airbnb listing so while I mentioned the film crew to her 2 years ago she never asked what it was about and I'm sure she has absolutely no idea that this footage exists. I plan on just casually coming across the documentary on April 1st and watch it with her to see her reaction.

mesayinghello

This tread won't self-destruct, though.

A while back I got an app that could send an error message to a computer with customized text.

For a few weeks I would send sporadic messages like "Monitor Error 1003." "Monitor synch error," etc.

On April Fools day I sent the message "Monitor radiation shield has failed, please step back 5 feet."

bardolino1999

This was back in the old Macintosh Finder days with a big 24" CRT. There are some apps that can generate windows 10 errors out there that you can google, but I haven't used them so I won't recommend them for anyone to install.

bardolino1999

THIS IS PURE GENIUS.

yuujinn

Always spin your eggs.

My great-grandpa got his kids to start cracking hard boiled eggs on their foreheads. Then, on April 1st, he gave my great-uncle a raw egg.

Dankpotatocat

This is why I always do the spin test before cracking eggs on my forehead.

UncleMoustache

MY GRANDPA DID THIS! I have never seen it anywhere but he would have us crack the confetti filled hardboiled shells and have a "lottery" with an actual hard boiled egg.

Bee_K1ng

Brilliant.

Here's how I convinced a friend his house was haunted.

Rain-x is the stuff you put on your windshield to keep it from fogging up. Instead, use it to write on your friend's bathroom mirror various "haunting" phrases. They go into the bathroom, lock the door, get in the shower, and come out to find someone has seemingly written on their bathroom mirror while they thought they were alone.

"Get out", "help me", something more personal, or whatever you like.

Every time you want to change the message, just use some dish soap and then glass cleaner.

Brainsonastick

Dip your face in it, then press your face to the mirror leaving a face print of it

Rakonas

This is a win/win, you'll scare the living sh!t out of your friend, AND you'll probably die.

DosReedo

Death in this case is just a bonus haunting.

windjamm

Found my April Fool's plans.

The old Penny Trick. I did this to my mom and it drove her nuts.

Day 1, you leave a penny in an obvious spot where you'd expect to find a penny, and wait for them to find it.

Day 2, repeat. Put another penny somewhere else, but obvious. Let them find it.

Repeat this off and on for roughly a week. After around a week, they should start to think about it more. Then start leaving them twice a day for the week.

On week 3, start leaving them in odd spots that pennies shouldn't exist. Bathroom sink, windowsill, inside their shoes. Get creative. Pillows, inside their pockets if you can manage it.

After a while if done right, it will drive them absolutely mad. I was questionable on its effectiveness when I first started it, but after week two my mom was freaking out because she kept finding them.

edit

Source for where I first heard of this:

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/17d7uy/whats_the_most_creative_way_of_driving_someone/c84fpei

TheTaoOfOne

I did something similar with plastic cutlery and almost ruined a friendship.

onthereels

Amazing.

This is more of a "day of" situation but it's too good not to share.

At my work we clock in by punching in our employee number. Last year one of my coworkers placed a sign on the time clock that read "the time clock has been updated for voice activation. Please state your full name followed by 'clocking in/out'."

All day I just heard people yelling at the time clock trying to clock in. It was incredible!

My manager was in on it too so no one was made late because of it. Just good clean fun.

badace12

This, but with Elmer's glue.

Bring hand moisturizer to work, and leave it somewhere like the break room. Conspicuously use it, and convince as many other people to use it as possible.

On April 1st, replace it with a bottle filled with water-based lube.

marco262

I would do this, but with hand sanitizer.

PaperCutOnYourAnus

Hmmm, we do have a communal bottle of hand sanitizer at work. I am a little tempted to do this.

DentD

Whatever this is funny.

Maybe not a long con, but you'll need a syringe, and idk how long that takes to get. Anyway in ninth grade, me and my friends always stole each other's food at lunch when someone got up to go to the bathroom.

So one time I filled white lindor truffles with ranch and two of my friends vomited.

BackAllySurgeon

Your local feed or tractor supply will have large syringes designed for livestock vaccinations. You can buy 1 there.

DeathbyHappy

So, for all the students reading, know that if you get caught your going to get in trouble for both having a needle at school without a medical need (like epi or insulin) and for tampering with food. So, make your prank food at home, be sure you are aware of any food allergies, and definitely don't attempt to give them to a staff member.

a_junebug

What a great gift idea.

My friend got me with a glitter bomb one time, which she watched me open in my bedroom, right next to my bed. I still found glitter three years later when I moved apartments.

When it happened, I knew she would be wary of a counter attack, so I waited. And I decided not to just wait, but to long con her. I knew she liked candles, so I went for simplicity: I got her a candle that smelled great at first, but eventually burned down to smell awful. Not after an hour, mind you, but after quite a bit of it burned off giving a very pleasant apple pie scent.


Months went by, and I would see it at her place. Burned a little, but not too much. Occasionally I would notice it getting lower, but it was slow going. I got disheartened when I didn't see it any longer, until I noticed that she had moved it to her bedstand, right by where her head would be when she slept.

Aww, so sweet. She liked my gift.

Cut to many more months having passed. Almost two years since I first got her the candle, I get a bunch of angry texts late at night. "You ahole! That candle! It reeks in my bedroom!" My magnum opus had finally been achieved.

It turns out that she had brought her date home that night and put the candle on to set some ambiance. As they're getting hot and heavy, they start to smell what she described as "pure sewage". It took them five minutes to figure out it was the candle and not some sort of sewage backup, then the smell lingered for an hour.

In the end, the guy was a good sport and recognized a quality prank when he sees one, so it didn't ruin anything between them, but to have a long con end that spectacularly was just better than I could have ever hoped for.

RoloJP

Some men just want to watch the world burn.

I work with a group of 5-6 guys. I plan on separately swearing each of them to secrecy, then revealing that one of their coworkers is planning a wicked April Fool's day gag on them and that we should work to plan an even better one against this schemer. If I do it right, I'll have my coworkers conniving to destroy one another and sit back and watch it all unfold...as long as they don't catch on.

Edit: Thank you for the gold! Let me also add that I'm a good sport and fully expect to fail at this; HOWEVER, the epic win that would come from this actually working is a story I'll be able to tell forever. If anyone knows this Mash episode, I'd love to see it!! Maybe I can get a pointer or two. Lastly, I can't start too early or they'll figure it out for sure. I'm thinking two weeks might be ideal to start stirring up trouble.

OffAndRunning

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Chef's gave us some of their top tips for amateurs and beginner at home cooks that will really make a difference. They are trained professionals with years of experience in the kitchen, so they definitely know what we're all missing.

If you're looking to improve some of your cooking skills and techniques, but you're still learning how to boil water correctly, this list is for you.

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Let's learn from the masters!


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- Vexvertigo

"Instructions unclear I drugged my dinner party guests and now they're high on acid."

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- darkhorse85

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- Osolemia

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"Salt is important for sweets. A batch of cookies without that little hint of salt doesn't taste quite right."

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"If I drop anything else, my stupid hands are all over themselves trying to catch it (and often failing). But with a knife the hardwired automatic reaction is jump back immediately. Fingers out of the way, feet out of the way, everything out of the way. Good lookin out, cerebellum!"

- sonyka

"Speaking of KICKING in. On first full time cooking job I had a knife spin and fall off the counter. My (stupid) reflex was to put my foot under it like a damn hacky sack to keep it from hitting the ground. Went through the shoe, somehow between my toes, into the sole somehow without cutting me. Lessons learned: (1) let it fall; (2) never set a knife down close to the edge or with the handle sticking out; (3) hacky sack is not nearly as cool as it could be."

- AdjNounNumbers

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- Metallic_Substance

How else will you know it tastes good?

"Taste the food."

- OAKRAIDER64

"Also don't be afraid to poke and prod at it. I feel like people think the process is sacred and you can't shape/flip/feel/touch things while you cook them. The more you are hands on, the more control you have."

"No, this does not include situations where you are trying to sear something. Ever try flipping a chicken thigh early? That's how you rip a chunk out of it and leave it glued to the pan until it's burnt."

- Kryzm

Here's one just for laughs.

"When you grab a pair of tongs, click them a few times to make sure they are tongs."

- Kolshdaddy

"People really overlook this one. You've gotta tong the tongs a minimum of 3 times to make sure they tong, or else it can ruin the whole dish."

- BigTimeBobbyB

If you're looking to get into cooking or to improve you technique, pay attention to these few tips.

Salt generously, add an acid to brighten things up, and don't forget to taste your food!

If all else fails, you can always order take out.

Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

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