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People Explain Why They Ended Their Relationship With Their Best Friend

People Explain Why They Ended Their Relationship With Their Best Friend
Photo by GR Stocks on Unsplash

Whether you like to hear it or not, you'll have several "best friends" in your life and some stick around longer than others. Some will be around for as long as you're around; others enter your life for specific periods, leave their mark, and then go on their merry (or maybe not so merry) way.

After Redditor thisbloomingbud asked the online community, "Those who ended their relationship with their best friend: What was the breaking point?" people shared their stories. Do you see some of your own experience in any of these? You probably do. If there's something we all understand, it's the end of a relationship, the closing of a chapter, and the ushering in of another.


"He married a woman whose upbringing..."

He married a woman whose upbringing had resulted in her being repulsed by physical contact and sex in general. To try to fill the void in his life, he made a pass at my wife. I have not talked to him since she told me what he did.

fredzout

"He promised me..."

He promised me he would pay my rent with our business profits while I went out of town but instead bought a truck with our money and told my landlord that I had the money but refused to pay. My family ended up homeless.

ryanhedden1

"Our friendship had been really codependent..."

When my dad was dying of stage four cancer, she just smiled and said, "I didn't like him anyway."

Like, in the same room as him. He was awake and it was one of the last things he ever heard.

Our friendship had been really codependent and unhealthy for years, but that was the sentence that made me realize that she wasn't just edgy and kind of cold, she was actually a bad person. I only met up with her one time after that (for closure).

sleepylittlesnake

"Realized I was the one keeping the friendship alive..."

Realized I was the one keeping the friendship alive and she didn't really care. She's been passive aggressive and had lied and gaslighted in the past but she had become ruder and more dismissive lately and I was too angry with her to let it go. Looking back it was a long time coming.

ImaginaryNewspaper13

"She was always belittling me..."

When I realized her childhood/family was too dysfunctional and she was taking her anger/frustration out on me since mine was not. She was always belittling me and talking over me and I just realized it wasn't worth it. She was funny and we liked the same things but if I spent more than 2 hours with her, I came home feeling worn down.

four2andnew

"I tried everything I could..."

They became a meth addict and blamed everyone else for their problems. I tried everything I could to help them for over a year. I ruined a lot of my own life trying to be there for them. It was a hard lesson to learn that sometimes the people that you really love and care about are beyond help. It hurts to remember the person that she used to be and admit to myself that the person I knew is gone.

BareBearFighter

"I couldn't stand the thought..."

She was just accepting failure every time. She was dealt a horrible hand in life and inherited her dead mom's dilapidated hoarding house and moved in.

I offered to help her to clean it countless times but the last time i went in it looked like it needed condemning. She also dated a strung-out dead beat guy and they are so toxic together. Definitely lots of Xanax and probably heroin involved. The final straw was they bought a husky with no previous dog knowledge. Neither her nor her boyfriend could afford flea meds and the dog was likely anemic from the fleas. I spent my own money to help with her poor dog to clean it up. The next day her boyfriend was asking on FB where he could buy an xbox or PC for the lowlow.

I couldn't stand the thought of not coughing up the $100 to get flea meds and a flea bath for your clearly neglected dog but they can afford Xanax and Xboxes. I blocked her on everything, we were friends for 10 years but I couldn't watch her become such a piece of s*** anymore.

greenthot

"Makes it a lot easier."

He and I lived on opposite sides of the country. I had been thinking of moving to Phoenix at the time since I knew people there but I didn't care for the heat. He told me I should move in with him in Alabama and I could crash on his couch until we got a bigger place. Fast forward 6 months, 2 weeks away from moving 3 thousand miles, and I finally put my notice in at work. I get home and tell him on Discord and he asks me where I'm going to be living. I said with him since that was the plan. He then tells me I can no longer crash on his couch because he can't bring girls over when a random guy is living on his sofa. I was livid. I knew I couldn't find a place in two weeks when I wasn't even there yet but I tried.


I did eventually move to Alabama and he and I plus 2 others got a big house. It was a mistake. He's hands down the worst person I could ever call a friend. He uses people. He'll make plans with you and ditch you. He'll tell you whatever you want to hear. I tried talking to him about some personal issues and he would treat it as some sort of competition of who has it worse. We moved away from each other but now we're living together because he needed a place to go after getting kicked out of where he was. He tells people that me and my other roommate were hurting financially and that's why he lives with us. Took me a while to confront the fact that we're not friends. First time I cried over losing a friend in my life. In hindsight it's good riddance. I might have to live with him now but I ignore him for the most part. Makes it a lot easier.

Jewpracabra

"The sad thing is..."

My childhood best friend was always ditching me at the last minute for any better opportunity that came up. Babysitting jobs, sleepovers with more popular girls at school, etc. She literally told me to my face, "We can always make plans another time." Well excuse me for thinking that my best friend would actually want to honor her commitments to me.

Enough was enough when she called me during the evening on a day she was absent from school demanding to know why I hadn't called her to see if she was ok. I had broken up with my boyfriend that day but she didn't give a s***. She just assumed I would always be there for her when she wanted me, but she'd kick me to the curb when I wasn't any use to her.

The sad thing is that I -wanted- to always be there for her. When things were good, she was an amazing friend and we had so many great times together. I still think back and wonder if ending our friendship was the right thing to do. But she didn't treat me right and I finally had to leave. I have never had the same bff/sister level friendship with anyone else. But I no longer invest my loyalty where I know I won't get it back.

madaboutpiano

"We haven't seen each other since."

Wouldn't come to my wedding even though he introduced my wife and I. Tried to explain to him there was nothing I wanted more other than for him to be there. His girlfriend at the time didn't want to go because she was insecure with her appearance.

We haven't seen each other since. My wife and I will be celebrating our 33rd anniversary soon.

GTO-farm

"After being ignored..."

After being ignored, pushed around, and controlled for 3 months I got the hell out of there. She wouldn't let me hang out with my other friend group at a Halloween dance because, "I have to hang out with the group I decided to match costumes with." She gave me disgusted looks. She talked with everyone but me at my lunch table. I got offered a spot at my other friend groups table and I took it immediately. I don't talk to her anymore.

LoudFish-2

"I was being sexually..."

She traded me up when she got transferred to a promotion. All of a sudden, she was too busy to call or text or spill tea.

I was being sexually harassed and walked out the door - I tried to drop hints about it. She always brushed me off, said I didn't understand the HR process (because she's in HR) and that I'm too intense about systemic racism and prejudice.

I dropped sh!t for this person. I bought her mother presents and shit for her birthday. I thought this person would be another aunt to my kids.

I wasn't cool enough for her. But now, i hear, shes super interested in learning about racial issues.

Big-Barda

"Luckily..."

When I realized that I couldn't tell them good news.

Every time I say something, no matter how big the accomplishment, it gets responded with a "oh cool but I did this.." I'm just not someone who feels the need to one up my friends. If they do something they're proud of then I'm gonna make the moment about them.

When I realized that i'm really uncomfortable around them.

A few years ago, I started to realize that I really don't look forward to hanging out with them. I still forced myself to see them because I thought it was me, I thought I was just depressed and something was wrong with me. I then began to pay attention to how I feel when I'm with them and I hate it. I feel like I have to pretend when I'm around them and be someone I'm not.

When I realized that they become different people when women are around.

I get it (I guess) that maybe sometimes you try to flex a little too hard when you're around a pretty girl but my god, this really rubbed me the wrong way. Every time there was a pretty girl around he says trying to show off, "I have this and that" and "I do this and that" making sure they hear. The worst is when they try to bring me down when women were around.

When I realized I'm just not like them.

They like starting facebook drama, they like to constantly assert dominance, they talk sh!r about anyone and everyone, think they're never wrong it's just... a lot. I'll never forget the one night I was talking to someone who had been an old friend and they made fun of them once they left and I just let them..

I can't bring new friends around them, I would never bring the girl I was talking to at the time around them, I would never bring family around them and yet I still wanted to be their friends because I believed that finding new friends at 20+ years old would be impossible and not something I wanted to do.

Luckily, as of a few weeks ago, I stopped responding to the group chat, I unfollowed them on social media and cutting ties with them. If anything I'd rather be alone than associating with them.

KidRadicvl

"After 22 years..."

After 22 years, my breaking point was him predicting a TV show's storyline outcome with 100% certainty- even said it was a spoiler not a prediction. Sent me 25+ texts and audio messages all day trying to show me what a prophet he was. Of course, it didn't come true and I said as much- very politely and as a joke. He would have preferred I ignore it like I did for all of his other theories and predictions which never panned out.

He sent 10 minutes of audio and long paragraphs of text to explain he was reverse jinxing the outcome. And to add insult to injury he tried to turn the tables on me by taking my hyperbole as literally. So not only did he accept zero responsibility for being wrong, he wanted to chip away at me.

He blamed everything on stressful work and living in a Corona world in 2020. My final message was about him not knowing when to let something go and there was no reason for him to be defensive. My jokes were whoosh- over his head.

Bottom line? He smothered me for decades. I always felt obligated to respond to his calls, e-mails, and texts at work and in my free time. And he wanted detailed, thought-provoking responses. He has let me down on the jobs I gave him and is oblivious about it. Drama king- always an issue with work, family, and gets triggered at every new article. Gave him two loans, never paid back one and has no idea he was wrong. Misery loves company- very competitive and liked me to be at his level of outrage and financial status. He gets real high or low when he's too tried, overworked, stressed, etc. yet time and time again will not listen to me when I tell him to sleep it off or at least give me a break.

My heart was broken for a week and I still am learning to make new habits. But I feel free. He is the type to drive to my house and apologize, so I am not looking forward to that. I'm sure he cannot think without me and no one else can listen to his rants/theories on government, society, family, bosses, money, philosophy, psychology, China, etc. He needs to learn.

Leach! Pest! But, oh, he is a "nice guy"!

jennychan_fla

"When they both decided..."

When they both decided to abandon me in the lowest and most depressed point of my life and when I was finally able to try and talk it out with them they both refused to accept any responsibility and blamed me, deciding that they were upset about minor things that had happened four months ago and they'd never talked to me about.

janiepantss

"He was a platonic friend..."

He was a platonic friend to my ex girlfriend of 6 years with whom i had recently broken up with. Found out he was telling her most of what I was sharing with him, including my follow-up dating. I was really taken aback as it was absurdly cruel on both sides.

We do not talk anymore and his only excuse was "you know me, i have a big mouth". He was a 33 year old man.

bowser85

"Somewhere in between..."

Somewhere in between cleaning her cats piss out of my things for the thousandth time and her and my husband having an emotional affair.

ClimbingVine

Red Flags That Signal Someone Wasn't Raised Right

"Reddit user spirallinggg asked: 'What immediately tells you that a person wasn't raised right?'"

Two young boys are having a pillow fight
Photo by Allen Taylor

Parents are meant to teach offspring how to survive in this world.

They're meant to guide us on how to be a good member of society.

But either some parents fail, or too many adults don't get the message.

And all that can lead to a mighty dysfunctional adult.

Redditor spirallinggg wanted to hear about the ways we can decipher if others have bad parenting, so they asked:

"What immediately tells you that a person wasn't raised right?"

Basic human decency is a sign of a good upbringing.

Garbage

"They throw trash out a car window."

shershae

"I live on a busy road and I’m so sick of people throwing their trash in front of my house. Some guy tosses out a tall boy beer nearly every workday. I can’t wait to move. Also- so many cigarette butts! We live in a high fire hazard area so I’m worried one of these days they’ll start a fire. I try to go pick up litter twice a month."

Pinkmongoose

Random Aisles

"People who dump refrigerated grocery products on random aisles."

glockops

"I work in a grocery store. The best one I saw was someone who ordered a hot pizza from our pizza station, which is made-to-order. Then abandoned it in the cooler with the refrigerated take-and-bake pizzas we have."

"I get finding stuff from our service case abandoned, it's already cold and our prices are much higher than some people think (the last abandoned item I found was a $20 container of our fresh fruit salad [which comes in pre-cut]), but the pizza station has set menu prices, they should have known what they were getting into before they ordered."

weedtrek

Be Responsible

"Lack of personal accountability. they can never admit wrongdoing on their part. it's always someone else's fault."

Sona-kin

I always told my kids that a mistake doesn't define who you are... but what you do AFTER the mistake DOES. We're human. We're gonna screw up throughout our lives. It's unavoidable. What we can control, however, is choosing to apologize, fix the situation, make amends, etc."

nakedwithoutmyhoodie

Rude

Mean Girls Gossip GIF by Paramount MoviesGiphy

"When they talk badly about someone who hasn’t done anything wrong behind their back."

flowerzforthedead

THIS. I've seen coworkers talking behind the backs of new employees and drawing conclusions about every aspect of their lives. Like, you've seen that person for three days, you MF.

Cold-Load-4388

If you can't say it to their face, then don't say it.

Why do people have to crap talk?

Check Please

Escalate Customer Service GIF by FILMRISEGiphy

"Being super rude to people in any service profession. There is a time and place for actual, appropriate complaints but I see people constantly abuse service staff for no damn reason. Hell, even using 'please' and 'thank you' seems beyond some people. Bums me out."

CaptainLawyerDude

Others

"Lack of consideration for others."

NewVAinvestor1

"A lot of people do not fundamentally understand other people exist. They understand things exist. They understand those things should be referred to as people. But they do not understand those things have an entire existence and experience all their own exactly like them."

Sh3lls

No!

"When they can't take no for an answer."

NerdyPlaneResident

"I'm going to step up and admit to being guilty of this. For the longest time, I had it in my head that persistence pays off. Some of that was pop culture, some of that was tenacity in other areas of my life being rewarded, and then applying that to interpersonal relationships. Older and wiser me, though is more along the lines of learning to let go. It's still a struggle though, working against that original conditioning."

SergeantPsycho

Professions

"When someone looks down at others based on what they do. That just clearly shows that they've learned the same thing from their caregivers."

Leekayleigh_

"Oh yes. My husband took on a second job doing pizza deliveries. A few people laughed at him doing that at his age. They don't laugh when he explains his main job is simple and, deliveries are just driving blasting tunes and adds $900 a month after tax to our income. Then they see all the travel. Usually shuts them up."

CurvePuzzleheaded361

Offensive

For Real Wow GIF by DeStormGiphy

"Zero manners."'

Fuzzteam7

"I took a guy to a family beach condo because he says he never goes to the beach. Let him tag along with our group. Never said thank you one time. I dropped him back off at his house, and I said can you at least say thanks, he was so offended I asked or was trying to force a thank you."

berrey7

"BUT"

"When someone apologizes, and then adds a but onto it. For example, my boss held a meeting among the kitchen staff where he apologized for his attitude, and then added 'But you guys need to understand that I'm a no-bulls**t kind of person.' No sir, that's not how apologies work."

GimmickInfringement1

I hate a BUT.

Either you mean what you offer or don't say it.

man and woman together with boy and girl looking at green trees during day

Ioann-Mark Kuznietsov on Unsplash

Parenting isn't a simple job.

The health, safety and well-being of another human being is on the line. Eventually that human will enter society with all the lessons or traumas of their childhood shaping them.

That's a lot of responsibility.

But even the most well-meaning parents can mess up.

Keep reading...Show less
People on a date
Photo by René Ranisch on Unsplash

Though we mean nothing by it, there's no denying the fact that there are some characteristics, personality types, and behaviors that we find to be a total turn-off when it comes to dating.

The difficult part, though, is that what we find to be unattractive might be an unusual or unexpected thing to point out to someone else. To each their own, right?

Curious about what others' expectations were, Redditor DawnOfLegion1 asked:

"What's the weirdest dating requirement you have?"

Similar Intelligence

"He should be as smart as or smarter than me."

"There's no bigger turnoff than a guy who is noticeably dumber and there's nothing hotter than a guy who is particularly intelligent."

- _hootyowlscissors

"I'll second this. If he's slightly less intelligent, I can deal with it (although it IS a turnoff), but I've had friends date hot dumb guys, and I never got the appeal. At all. Even if the guy was sweet, I just kept thinking I would feel like I was messing with the village id**t. Not my thing at all."

- LeRuseRenard

Completely Available

"I require my date to be single. Not 'we have an understanding', not 'she doesn't understand me', and not 'we're separated and neither of us can afford an apartment on our own.' SINGLE. Not married."

"The last time a guy told me that his wife was okay with it, I told him that I wanted to hear those words from his wife. Never talked to him again."

- INobodyisme

Mind the Rules

"No getting up at 6:00 AM to do CrossFit."

"No drinking and driving."

"No crazy ex that seems to hang around with them a lot."

- Haelifae

One Word: Reciprocity

"Not a requirement, but if I paid for dinner, you paying for two ice creams or coffees isn’t all that bad."

- Soup_and_Rice

"Reciprocity."

"The older I get, the more I realize how important it is that they put in as much effort as I am."

"It doesn't have to be the same thing, have your own style; but I can't be doing all the work, all the time."

"This is with money (buy me dinner sometimes, offer to get my drink), sex (I can be a little more dominant, but you have to initiate sometimes, you have to be into it, I can't do all the work), romance or intimacy (reach out and grab my hand to walk, touch my back sometimes), or communication (text me first just to check in, for once)."

- TheLateThagSimmons

Weird Requirement: Weird

"She must be weird. And I mean truly, the kind of weird that makes other men run away."

- Vamluck

Just Equally Weird

"They have to be a little bit pervy and a little bit weird."

- CherryApple89

"When I was younger, if I was at the bar and there was a guy I thought might be fun to talk to, I would walk up and in the sexiest voice, I would tell them they have the hottest knees I have ever seen on a man."

"10 seconds flat, I would know whether they were someone I wanted to get to know. So I think I have the weird thing down."

- Dull-Geologist-8204

The Importance of Quiet Time

"I wanna be able to just chill with them doing nothing. I've been with someone who always had to be doing something and it got exhausting really fast."

- Shatteredfart

Seems Fair

"Not currently recovering from something."

"All tattoos must be spelled correctly."

"Employed."

"Four-tooth minimum."

- Mohawk60

Staying on Equal Footing

"Not sure how weird it is, but my rule is that I pay for myself every step of the way until we decide to become a couple."

"After that, we can split the bills, or take turns treating each other, etc., if that is what we both choose."

"Too many times I let a guy buy me dinner, and it is somehow implied that I now owe him something. Nope. All done with that."

- One-Internet-1982

"As a man, I have a lot of respect for that. I don't mind paying for dates and such, but I always get a bit of an icky feeling when the woman expects or demands it."

"I prefer more of an equal partnership rather than old-school gender roles, and stuff as basic as, 'Hey, you paid for the last date, let me get this one,' goes such a long way, and I feel like it also shows genuine interest from the other person."

- CaptainFresh27

Willing to Try New Things

"No picky eaters. It’s okay if you’re not a foodie, but I like to cook, and if you won’t give my food a chance, it’s not gonna work out."

- Pandaburn

A Lover of Drama

"If your profile says, 'No drama, please,' I immediately assume you are the drama or are too immature to handle life’s normal ups and downs and consider that to be drama."

- WillowWispWhipped

Intense Passion

"I love it when they have a hyper fixation."

- Unlikely-Base-4989

"The ADD/ADHD community loves you back."

- YakitoriChicken93

Knowing Your Own Limits

"No horse girls."

"I've got nothing against it, but it’s always very important to them and I’m too terrified of horses to be properly supportive, lol (laughing out loud)."

- Former-Finish4653

What's in a Name?

"They cannot have the same name as my sister or my mom."

"Alternatively, my name is unisex and a girl with my name is a turn on."

- Smellymyhand

Quite the Commitment

"I've decided that anybody I plan to spend my life with has to be willing to buy and ride a tandem bike with me."

- Sheepherder_7648

Despite the prompt being "weird requirements," some of these make a lot of sense, and more people might be adding these to their list of requirements after reading this.

But others are slightly more unexpected and likely fall under the "to each their own" category.

People on a busy street
Photo by Jason Wong on Unsplash

We all find ourselves having an unexpected run-in with someone we know on the street every now and then.

In some cases, it's a pleasant surprise and plans are immediately made to catch up.

In other cases, you dig out the first excuse you can to keep on moving, as this particular individual was not someone you hoped would re-enter your life.

Then, of course, there are the times you run into an ex.

Whether you ended things amicably or acrimoniously, it's always going to be an awkward encounter.

Just how awkward it will be, however, depends on your reaction.

Redditor rageondad was curious to hear how people would react if they unexpectedly saw their ex on the street, leading them to ask:

"You see your first ex on the street, what do you do?"

Nothing But Happy Memories...

"1st ex: say hi, nice conversation."

"All good."

"2nd ex: hide from her again, like I did that one time at the gas station."- jfg1435

Who?

"Ignore him because he’s not worth saying hi to."

"And I wouldn’t care about him at all."- Big-Elevator2491

One Way To Handle It...

"Start taking a sh*t on the side walk immediately."- ceiling_fanzz

Excuse Me What GIF by BounceGiphy

No Harm, No Foul

"Say hi."- hot-breadfruit_poop

"And ask how they are doing."

"I'm a curious creature, what can I say?"- Lamacorn

Nothing But Excitement

"Give each other a huge hug."

"We're going to see each other next week for the first time in 25 years."

"It'll be good."

"We've remained friends this whole time, so we're both looking forward to it."- riceme0112358

"Say hi, give him a hug, ask him what he's doing in town."- m00nf1r3

Couple Love GIF by PantayaGiphy

Ouch!

"Didn't you die?" -Reddit

"Wonder who dug her up."- 8urfiat

"Walk On By..."

"Just keep walking."- MythicalMicrowave

Walking By Moe Szyslak GIF by Football AustraliaGiphy

Even If It Means J-Walking

"Cross the street."- no_days_grace

Avoiding Your Ex In Five D's...

"Dodge, dip, duck, dive, and dodge."- catinatank·

The Passage Of Time

"I would wish her well if I recognized her."

"It’s been over 20 years since I’ve seen her."

"It’s not like we parted on bad terms or anything."- Fangsong_37

Lana Parrilla GIF by Paramount+Giphy

Go For The Jugular

"You've sure gotten old."- drpepper1992

About Face

"Run."- saus_blu

Remain Amicable

"Have a chat."

"We are still friends."- Mentalfloss1

Meg Ryan Comedy GIF by Coolidge Corner TheatreGiphy

Of course, the worst element of surprise is having no idea how we might react.

Try as we might to plan just what we'd do should we ever run into an ex, we can't possibly know what will actually happen should that moment arrive.

Though, hopefully it won't ever lead to defecating on the street.